All language subtitles for Its a Sin s01e05.eng

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Hello, Pink Place and Chinese Laundry,

how may I help you?

Thank you.

I'm sure that's very funny,

but I could be someone important.

I could be calling about work.

Is he there?

Yes, hello Mrs. T.

I'll just get him now.

Ritchie, it's your mom.

And how are you?

How's the show?

It's nice, yeah.

I've got a job for life there.

I'm very lucky.

Richie, where are you?

Coming.

Here he comes.

Here he is, taking his time as always.

Hi, sorry I was outside.

It's just a quick call,

but I was just wondering about Christmas.

Oh God, it's November.

Well, that's close enough.

Didn't see you last year.

Well, I thought we could
all have a nice time.

I just don't know.

I've got an audition

for this thing on
Scottish TV, police thing.

Well, that's nice.

Do we get that?

No, it's only in Scotland.

I've not got it yet, but I
need to sort of be on standby.

But it's been ages since we saw you.

I know.

That's the job, sorry.

But just think about it though.

Please come home.

It's been such a long time.

I'd love to see you.

I heard Birmingham Rep,

they're doing a production
of "Hay Fever" next summer.

I could audition.

Birmingham, how are
you gonna go up there?

Well, I can.

There are trains with toilets.

I can manage.

Seriously though, what
if you need a piss on stage?

I'm not that bad, do you mind?

No, but the thing is,
you've done "Hay Fever."

They're not going to cast
the same boy in Birmingham.

They don't do that, do they?

Not as a rule, but they might want me.

When has that ever happened?

There's gotta be a first time.

You don't need to make faces.

I'm not.

I just think let's get over this bit

'cause your tum's not very well,

but you were like this in
July and you got much better.

So let's wait for that to happen.

Then we can think about Birmingham.

Oh, you were brilliant in that show.

Oh, you were amazing.

God, you were funny.

I was good, wasn't I?

Absolutely brilliant.

You were, I'm not even kidding,

you were the best thing I've ever seen.

Come on you.

Bedtime, it's late,
nearly half past seven.

♪ It didn't hurt me ♪

♪ You wanna feel how it feels ♪

♪ You wanna know, know
that it didn't hurt me ♪

♪ You wanna hear about the deal ♪

There now, give you a good shake.

Rattle, rattle, rattle.

Good night then, darling.

And we need a word in the
morning about your mom and dad.

Up your bum.

Up yours too.

Good night.

♪ Be running up that hill ♪

♪ Be running up that building ♪

♪ If I only could ♪

Oh, look at you, oh no, no, no, no, no.

I'm okay, I just fell.

It's all right, I fell, that's all.

I just feel a bit hot.

He was on AZT, but he's
been on DDI since August.

Honestly, I'm going
into hospital on Wednesday

for the Pentamindine.

They can look at me then.

Everything okay?

Yeah, Richie fell out of bed,

and he's got a bit of a temperature.

Tell him God blesses his soul.

Charity from downstairs
says, "God blesses your soul."

Oh, I feel better already.

He's such a beautiful boy,

but you know what they say, don't you?

You know what the AIDS stands for?

What?

It stands for angels in disguise.

They are preparing the
way for his eternal life.

He's very lucky.

Yeah.

Well Dr. Sullivan can take
a look at you first thing.

Till then, no more scares,
thank you very much.

Now get some sleep, and you too.

That's telling you.

Now do what she says.

I'll come back first thing.

And you lover boy, night then.

I'll be home tomorrow,
so don't sell my bed.

Okay, I know you.

Too late.

How are you getting home?

I'll get a taxi, don't worry.

I think Paul's awake.

No, I won't bother them now.

Could be your last chance.

We've got another lonely Joe, no visitors,

no parents or sisters or anything.

He's got to have friends.

We keep saying, "Can we phone anyone?"

He says, "No," and he lies
there all day dying of shame.

Hey, I heard you were in.

Come and say hello.

He'd like that.

Hey, Jill wants to say hello.

Jill Baxter, she's here.

Hello Paul.

Hello sweetheart.

Which one are you?

Jill, friend with Richie.

Can't remember.

It's okay, nevermind.

I can go if you want.

No.

I love you.

It's about time.

I left it a bit late.

I was busy.

I love you too.

He's got all sorts of complications,

but my main concern is
the lymphoma in his chest.

We caught it early, but
the next thing we do

is to offer chemotherapy,

but that's gonna make him even weaker.

So you'd say not?

It's his decision, but
really let's be sensible.

Let's say no.

I'm saying yes.

I know, but Richie you've got to look

at the overall picture.

Could the chemo help?

Yes, yes it could.

Well, there we are.

But we're saying the
chemo could make you

feel even worse.

Then let's find out.

I'm not gonna not have treatment, am I?

Now, shut up and wheel it in.

Oh, my god, you're impossible.

You two are murderers and
I'm going to call the police.

Did I tell you he's an actor?

Oh he knows that.

He's got my episode of "Tom's
Midnight Garden" on VHS,

and he pauses it on that bit
where I bend over the barrel,

and he has a little fiddle.

Frankly, I look so good in that shot,

I'd have a wank myself.

In fact, I have.

So go and get my chemo.

Oh, here comes trouble.

How'd it go with the chemo?

Oh, he's like Asterix the
Gaul that boy, indomitable.

He's sitting up, he's had some food.

Actually, I though I'd pop
in and see Paul, is that okay?

Oh yeah, he's okay.

He's rallying.

We're having a good day.

Room 703.

Yep, I know, thanks.

See ya.

If you've come here
to convert these people,

I will have you thrown
out onto the street.

I swear, that man, Reggie Lessips,

he's from the church, he
asked for me and I came.

You know he's queer.

I have blessed him.

I thought you'd gone.

They said you'd gone back to Nigeria.

I was in the west,

and I saw terrible things.

Ugh, my heart bleeds.

I went into hospitals and I saw people,

locked away with no medicines.

These doors were locked,
and the people behind them

were like animals.

I said, "Who are they?"

And they said, "They are the devils.

We let them die."

People with that disease.

But men and women, so many
women, and children too.

Have you got it?

What if I did?

Have you got it, Rosco?

- No.
- Oh God.

I haven't got it, no.

Thank you, thank you.

Don't thank God.

I just got lucky with who I fucked.

You know, it is so difficult Rosco.

It is the hardest challenge
the Lord gives us,

to forgive.

I don't want your forgiveness.

No.

I mean can you forgive me?

Do you know who I keep thinking about?

Donald Basset.

Would we know if he was dead?

He'd have an obituary in
"The Stage" wouldn't he?

Might do.

You don't know that it was him.

Yes, it was.

No, but it's kind of a good story.

He was ill and he infected you,

but that version's a bit easy.

It cuts out the hundreds
and hundreds of boys

you were having sex with at the same time.

It wasn't just me.

No, we all did.

But that's what I mean.

It's not really fair to blame Donald.

Just because he's the only boy

whose name you can remember.

You cheeky bastard.

You say what you see.

Do you think I infected him?

I wasn't saying that.

Because I did, with others,

'cause I knew and I kept having sex.

I thought I'd stop,

and I did a lot of times,
I stopped a million times.

I stopped with you.

But there were nights with too much booze,

actually, nights when
I was stone cold sober,

and if a boy just looked
at me in the right way,

a boy with that look in
his eye, I'd fuck him.

I would fuck him hard and
he could fuck me all night,

any way he likes.

I wonder how many I killed?

Don't say that.

I knew it was wrong
and I kept on doing it.

Do you hate me now?

There you are, at last.

Oh my God, what's wrong with you?

It says infectious diseases.

What the hell's that supposed to mean?

For god's sake, Richie, what is it?

What's happened, what's wrong?

What are you doing here?

We thought, surprise, we turned up,

and then your neighbor,
that woman downstairs,

she said you were here.

Oh, she would.

What's wrong, what is it?

Look, it's really nice to see you,

but I think we should all sit
down and have a little chat.

It's a bit complicated to explain.

Well evidently it's so complicated,

you chose not to tell us anything.

Now all I would like - We said to them,

- is a bit of common sense,
- we said, "What was it?"

They said infectious diseases

If that's not - You tell us,

- too much to ask.
- Richie, you tell me

- Clive, Clive, Clive.
- What's that mean?

Richard, what's wrong with you?

I've just got...

He's got some infections

and problems with his gut, and his lungs,

and right now there's a
lymphoma in his chest.

A lymphoma?

In his chest.

But that's cancer.

Don't be ridiculous,
that's what lymphoma means,

it means cancer.

Sort of, yeah.

Do you mean?

You've got cancer and you didn't tell me?

It's a sort of cancer.

I only got it 'cause I'm not well.

I've got AIDS.

I'm gay.

I'm homosexual.

I contracted HIV, and I'm
sorry, but now it's AIDS.

Where's your doctor?

It's a Saturday.

I don't think he's in.

He's called Dr. Sullivan, but-

- I wanna speak to a doctor.

Well, I'm quite sure
you believe all this

and this whole thing's got
completely out of control.

We'll get you better.

We'll get you better, all right?

We'll get all the shit, we'll clean it up.

I will scour it out of you, okay?

You really are very young, all of you.

You should see your faces.

We thought Christmas,
that's what we thought.

He won't come home for Christmas,

so we'll surprise him in November.

I've brought presents.

That's from Lucy.

Ah, that is from Auntie Elaine.

What on Earth's been going on?

I'm sorry.

Have you got cancer
or have you got AIDS?

It's both.

One causes the other.

Now, I don't need you-

- AIDS is like an immunity
thing, so you get weak,

and that causes the lymphoma.

My friend, Sarah, you remember Sarah,

how much did I like her, Richie?

I thought she was so wonderful,

and she had breast cancer and she died.

Are you telling me that she was weak,

that you get cancer because you're weak,

that you catch cancer
like catching a cold?

Because let me tell you
that is not how it works.

Okay, look, I know this is terrible,

but really this place
is looking after Richie,

and they're doing the most brilliant job.

Jill's here every day,

and I know we've only
met a couple of times,

but you might as well know
I'm Richie's boyfriend.

Well, no not really.

Well, I'm not not.

I know, but not now.

No, but that's who I am.

Ash, just shut up, yeah?

It's not the right time.

If you could hear
yourselves, you sound absurd.

But it's infectious isn't it, AIDS?

It's completely infectious.

It's like smallpox, it's like leprosy,

and it kills you, that's what it does.

So this isn't AIDS, is it?

They let us walk right in,
so it can't be, can it?

If you could wait five or 10 minutes,

I'll have a word with the registrar.

- I want to speak to someone
- Yes, if you can wait

who knows my son - five or 10 minutes

who has seen him.

Dr. Lucas knows Richie very well.

We were told Dr. Sullivan.

He's not on today,
but Richie's got quite

a number of doctors.

I don't know how much he's told you,

but Richie's got all sorts
And you never phone

- of different conditions.
- The parents?

My son is on this ward
and you don't phone me.

That's not our decision.

My son is in that room
with cancer and AIDS,

and has got, what did she say?

She say he's got something
wrong with his gut?

And you, you didn't think to phone.

We are not here.

His parents are clearly not here,

and you think that's wise, do you?

Like we aren't good for his health at all.

Is that right?

I'm afraid that's up to Richie.

His doctor is Dr. Sullivan.

Now you get him, get him, get him.

Hi, it that Suzie?

It's Lorraine.

There's a situation here.

I want a word with you.

Yes, I think we should.

There's a little sort
of kitchen down here.

They've got a room for families,

but there's someone in there.

Oh, okay.

Right, how's Lucy?

I'm really very sorry.

Do you want a tea or a coffee?

No, I don't want anything.

- I can put the kettle on.
- I said no.

I wanna say, and I'm
not criticizing Richie,

I just think you should know,

I told him to tell you 100 times.

See what you don't understand is this.

Boys are terrible, Jill.

They will do anything.

They are randy, they just are.

So when something like gay comes along,

it's just another chance to unload.

And someone like Richie,
he's young and he's pretty

and there'll be lots of those
men paying him attention

and so he goes

rutting once in a while.

But that doesn't make him homosexual.

It's a little bit of fun,
but then you grow up.

I suppose I don't know,
maybe some boys are like that.

But then there's Richie, who's gay,

absolutely definitely gay.

He's beautifully gay.

I'm sorry, but look at him.

I mean he's an actor, he
sings songs from the musicals,

he's never had a girlfriend.

And now he's got a gay disease.

Yes, yes he has.

Oh gosh.

I'm sorry.

Don't mind me.

We're just having a chat.

I'm getting some squash, two ticks.

Oh, this is a private conversation.

That's all right.

How is he?

Sleeping.

Sandra's got a son,
Derek, down the corridor.

This is Valerie.

I'll be gone in a minute.

Do you think I should have known?

Maybe.

It's like there's this
world of secret little codes.

And they like that,
boys, they like secrets.

Who's this?

It's my son, Richie.

You didn't know Richie was gay?

Jill, did you see that charity thing?

Canceled, little bloody idiots,

they couldn't get the
hours extended she said.

Are you implying that's a problem?

I think they're just gonna
move it to the pub next door.

Shall we go back to Richie?

No, excuse me, what do you mean?

What about?

Well you seemed to be surprised

that I didn't know about my son,

like that makes me one of your idiots.

Okay, we should leave this.

That's not what I said.

You implied it.

Oh well, I didn't mean
to imply anything, darling.

Pardon me for implying.

Let me make it clear.

What the hell were you lookin' at?

I beg your pardon?

If you didn't know he
was gay all those years,

what did you see when he
was 11, when he was 15, 16?

How old is he, 30?

All 30 years and every
little speck of him's

bent as a nine bob note
since the day he was born.

I'll ask you again, love,
what were you lookin' at?

You're his mother.

You're supposed to think
about him day and night.

So what the fuck were you doin'?

How dare you.

Get the door.

I didn't know.

It's 'cause I was being lied to.

All right sweetheart, I'm done.

I wasn't, I didn't...

Have I got this right?

I'm being blamed for not knowing my son,

when you conspired

and moved heaven and earth to lie to me.

I wasn't lying.

You sat there next to him, in my house,

time after time after time

with this great big elaborate lie.

I told you, I said every time,

I told you I wasn't his girlfriend.

And then you sat there simpering,

laughing at every word he said,

and you think I'm the one who's deceived.

Never mind about him having a boyfriend.

Where the bloody hell is yours?

I was doing what Richie wanted.

Is this what you are, a chorus girl,

running round after these
boys with no life of your own?

Okay, but I don't really
think this is about me.

But I think this is
absolutely about you.

Because you stood in the
way, you stood in the way.

If I couldn't see it, it's
because you stood in the way,

you monstrous

big bitch.

Have you found him yet?

No, but I'm phoning round.

What's your name?

Lorraine Fletcher.

Noted.

Where's my husband?

That's what I wanted to say.

He's in the TV lounge down there.

- Down where?
- Down there.

Well, what's the point of this?

He's dying.

For God's sake, is
that supposed to help?

There's no cure, Val.

That's what they say.

That's what those queers

and those women and their doctors all say,

because they all do and they say

and they think the same things.

They all worship the same rubbish.

Now you, you stop it, stop it, stop it.

I don't want you coming in here.

This is private.

I'm sorry.

I really sorry.

I want to know, are you infectious?

Well I could be, yes.

I know it's caught from sex.

Oh don't, Mom.

But how, how do you catch?

It's fluids, like blood and you know,

oh don't do this to me.

And spit, is it in your spit?

No one really knows.

You're not infectious,

not to me.

My boy, oh my boy.

My boy.

I'm sorry, Mom.

Oh, you silly thing.

I wanted to tell you.

Oh, I know sweetheart.

You are going to be fine.

I'm gonna take you home
and I can make you better.

Your grandmother
bought me a copy of this.

Do you remember, she had
that great big bookcase?

No, no, no, no.

Hi, it's only me.

How is he?

Not bad, thank you.

He's okay.

Can I talk to him?

He's fast asleep.

What does the consultant say?

Well, I'm afraid he was shocked

that a boy in Richie's condition

could be given chemotherapy.

That was his choice.

So now it's his fault?

Okay, we thought we could get the ferry.

We'd love to see him.

I think it's best to wait.

We could just pop in for
10 minutes, that's all.

I would remind you that
you had an awful lot of time

with him when I didn't.

I'll tell him you called.

Thank you, bye bye.

Oh, Jesus Christ.

I'm reading him "Watership
Down," but I'm rubbish.

I can't do all the voices.

I said to him there's only
one actor in this family.

Do you remember that "Hay Fever?"

Oh, it was brilliant.

You were so good in that.

I bought you some Garibaldi,

'cause I thought if you get
hungry there's fruit in them.

Bit dry.

I've still got that thrush.

Who was that on the phone?

Jill, she sends her love.

Is she gonna come visit?

She says she's very busy with work.

You can have a bit of TV.

I'll nip down the pub.

Oh yes, I thought you would.

I'm allowed a drink.

Did I say you couldn't?

Thank you for the permission.

Now, I was thinking how
much you used to love this.

Do you remember?

It's okay, just sit down.

You were 5-years-old,
and you'd dance around

because it was so funny,

and you'd be a little mouse.

Oh, do you remember?

And you loved the bit where
it says how lucky we am.

♪ A mouse lived in a windmill ♪

♪ In old Amsterdam ♪

♪ A windmill with a mouse in ♪

- ♪ And he wasn't grousin' ♪
- Do you remember

because it changes the rhyme
to rhyme with Amsterdam?

♪ How lucky I am ♪

♪ Livin' in a windmill in old Amsterdam ♪

How lucky we am.

♪ I saw a mouse ♪

Don't you think?

♪ Where, there on the stair ♪

How lucky we am.

♪ Right there ♪

♪ A little mouse with clogs on ♪

I'm a little late, sorry.

Stopped off for supplies,

although this is far too good for you lot.

Hello darling.

Nice to see you.

- You all right?
- Yes.

No, no, I'm not stopping
if you don't mind.

What's news from the Rialto?

We spoke to that solicitor.

He said technically Richie's mom and dad

could be breaking the law.

He said that here's evidence
that Richie could be unsafe.

He said that medical care is definitely

going to be worse on the Isle of Wight.

But so what?

I mean what are we gonna
do, take them to court?

I would.

Fuck them, do it.

But the solicitor
said that Richie said yes,

that's the problem.

Right, so I've done my sums,

and I've worked out that
Richie did that voiceover

for that Japanese cartoon.

I guess that sort of thing is repeated

for at least five or six years,

which amounts to £700, minus my 10%.

You should have this as an advance.

What for?

Well to go there, to the Isle of Wight,

just move there properly
for as long as it takes.

That should get you a couple
of rooms in a nice little B&B

or whatever they have
on the Isle of Wight.

Just go, lay siege on the
doorstep till they give in.

I can't go, I've got to work.

Well, I'm all right.

If we take the car, we could
get Richie out the house

and drive him back.

No, I wasn't thinking of a rescue.

But we could.

You're goin' there for one reason,

and that's to say goodbye,
because this only ends one way.

No, but he was ill last
July and then he got better.

And one day he won't.

I'm sorry darling, but
that is an absolute fact.

So take the money and fly.

Listen, I've gotta go.

If there's any money left, I'll have it.

Good luck.

Give him my love.

That's five nights upfront,
but we might be longer.

Is that a problem?

That's fine for the next three weeks,

but soon as we hit Christmas,
we've got bookings.

I'll let you know as soon as we can.

Have you got a telephone?

It's called the Bay Tree
House on the seafront.

It's just a 20 minute
drive from your house.

What on earth have you done that for?

I told you, I said clearly
he's not well enough.

That's okay, we can wait.

We're here for as long as it takes.

You know what I don't understand,

am I supposed to find this intimidating?

Valerie, we're not causing trouble,

we're just here, and we love him.

It's as simple as that.

If you ever want the afternoon off

or just an hour to yourself, we can come.

Are you saying I can't cope?

I'm just saying here we are,

and I will phone every day
until he's ready, okay?

Lots of love.

Okay, well I'll try you again tomorrow.

Give him my love, bye.

Okay, well give him my love,
tell him I said, "Hello."

Thanks Valerie, bye.

Just tell him we'd really love to see him,

and we're waiting, okay.

Let's say another five nights.

I really wanna see him,

and I think if you ask him
I bet he'll say the same.

Will you try?

♪ Roll out the barrel ♪

♪ We'll have a barrel of fun ♪

♪ Roll out the barrel ♪

♪ We've got the blues on the run ♪

So Dr. Clare said if we
can reduce the Phenytoin,

then well that's one less pill,
and that's got to be good.

Now I remember when your
granddad was in hospital,

he said, "If only they'd
stop giving me medicine,

I'd be fine."

You remember him?

Yeah.

He was a terrible man.

What do people know?

In what way?

The neighbors, Auntie Kat?

Do they know what's wrong with me?

It's none of their business.

I don't wanna be a secret.

Now, you just think
about getting better.

Boys die in London,

and they say it's cancer or pneumonia,

and they don't say what it really is.

Look, maybe we should think about tea.

They just lie and I don't want that.

Do you know why?

I had so much fun.

I had all those boys.

I had hundreds of them.

Oh Richie, don't talk like that.

And do you know what?

I can remember every single one of them.

Some boy's hair or his lips,

the way he laughed at a joke,

his bedroom, the stairs,

his photographs,

his face as he cums.

Seeing him across the club
six years later and thinking,

oh, that's him,

and he's with someone and he looks happy.

And I think, oh that's nice,

'cause they were great.

Some of them are bastards,
but they were all great.

That's what people will forget,
that it was so much fun.

Do you understand what I mean?

No.

That's why I need to see Jill.

Will you get her for me, please?

Hi, I got your message.

It wasn't so cold at the time.

I should have said
let's meet in that cafe.

Well, we can go there.

He said he wanted to
see you, so here I am.

I should apologize really.

I haven't handled this very well,

I realize that now, and I'm sorry.

No, I'm sorry too.

It was a bit mad turning up like that.

I just didn't know what else to do.

You made things very difficult.

Okay, and I'm sorry,

but all we wanna do is
see him and say hello

and give him our love.

He died yesterday,

yesterday afternoon.

Yesterday?

They said it was his heart,
pressure from the lymphoma.

No pain they said, before you
start, so it wasn't my fault.

Would have happened wherever he was.

Did he say anything?

Not really.

But what was the last thing he said?

He asked for some water.

Yesterday.

You didn't think, we
were sitting in the B&B.

You couldn't tell us last night?

My son had died, you
weren't top of my list.

But, I really did get this wrong,

and I'm sorry about that.

No, it might be nice
if we found that café.

There's so much I want to ask.

All those years in London, there
must be a thousand stories.

Were you with him, yesterday?

Were you there at the end?

No, I'd gone downstairs.

He was on his own?

- Yes.
- There was no one with him.

That's not my fault.

Actually it is your fault, Mrs. Tozer.

All of this is your fault.

Well thank you very much.

That's ridiculous.

But it is, right from the start,

'cause I don't know what happened to you

to make that house so loveless.

But that's why Richie grew
up so ashamed of himself.

I think we're finished.

And then he killed people.

And what is that supposed to mean?

He was ashamed, and he
kept on being ashamed.

He kept the shame going
by having sex with men,

and infecting them and then running away.

'Cause that's what shame does, Valerie.

It makes him think he deserves it.

The wards are full of men
who think they deserve it.

They are dying, and a
little bit of them thinks,

yes, this is right.

I brought this on myself.

It's my fault because the sex
that I love is killing me.

I mean it's astonishing.

The perfect virus came
along to prove you right.

So that's what happened in your house.

He died because of you.

They all die because of you.

I didn't know.

Merry Christmas.

Jill.

Do you remember when
he thought he'd lost it?

I might have.

That's your mother.

Cheers, cheers.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Hi, how are you doing?

Fine.

- Hi.
- Hi, Jill.

Hello there.

Hi, do you mind?

I'm Jill.

What's your name?

Marcus.

You okay, Marcus?

Anything I can get for you?

No.

Well, I might just sit here
for a bit if you don't mind.

Is that okay?

Yeah.

Good.

She made good view of me indeed so much

that sure me thought her
eyes had lost her tongue.

But this is a woman's speech.

So what, I'm being radical.

Now, shut up heathens.

Where was I?

I left no ring with her.

No, I've done that, hold on.

Richie, can I say you're terrible?

No, you can't, fuck off.

For she did speak in starts distractedly.

She loves me, sure.

The cunning of her passion invites me

in this churlish messenger.

None of my lord's ring?

Why, he sent her none.

I am the man.

If it be so, as it is, poor lady,

she were better love a dream.

♪ When your day is long ♪

♪ And the night, ♪

♪ The night is yours alone ♪

♪ When you're sure you've had enough ♪

♪ Of this life ♪