Original subtitles

Okay, guys!

The owner's shutting down the hotel.

Otherwise, you're good?

Shutting it down?

It's Will's dad.

He wants to diversify his portfolio and get into charity work.

What a joke! He once punished me for looking at a bum.

Seems your father's changed. He wants...

to turn the hotel... into an orphanage.

- Fuck! - Well, it is a good cause.

Screw the kids.

Jason needs new sneakers. That's not a good cause?

- Not really. - What will become of us?

We're all in the same boat, you know, sweetie.

Except, of course, the manager's office, which is being transferred to Paris.

- Awesome! I've never been to Paris! - No, Thomas.

She's being transferred to Paris.

So they're sending us packing? Is that it?

Come on... I mean, come on!

Yeah, come on.

I'll kill you! I'll kill you, bitch!

So we do nothing? We're patsies, then.

- I know! - Damn.

William, do what you should've done long ago.

- We'll handle this, Thomas. - Talk to your dad.

No, stop. Of course! He's right!

That's it. Convince him. It's our only chance to save the hotel.

No. My dad and I aren't speaking--

I will. I'll... I'll talk to my dad.

I'm an expert in dialogue, so it should be easy. Here I go.

Well, that's all great.

And I've calmed down, so you can let me go.

Alright.

I'm cool. I'm cool...

I'm not cool at all!

- So you're a humanitarian now? - Is that how you greet your father?

This orphanage of yours will get everyone sacked.

So, what, I should apologize for helping poor children?

Let me stop you right there. You've never been poor.

You can't fire people like that!

Really? And since when do you think about others?

- What about you? - Please...

Just because you think you're, like, Che Guevara

doesn't mean I'll change how I run my empire.

You're using the word "empire" literally? Alright.

Do you know what Bill Gates, Warren Buffett and Bernard Arnault have in common?

They never took their sons' advice.

Now scram. I have work to do.

Goodbye, dear.

Shut the door!

What?! Are you crazy?

- It's bull-- - So?

Well, I did what I could, but...

He didn't want to hear it.

There you go.

You devote your life to your job and this is what you get.

I'm so...

What's that on my face?

- Tears. - No tears allowed here.

Happens to me when I think nobody cares or would notice it if I was gone.

We have to fight for the hotel! This place is ours!

Nobody can take it away! It's unfair!

Wanting to help orphans is hardly unfair.

- No, it's unfair! - Poor abandoned children need more--

It's unfair!

Why not stick his dad's feet into the deep fryer?

I like that. Good idea.

- Maybe something a little less violent. - Give him a hug.

- A little more violent. - Shoot him in the head.

We have to do something!

Doesn't it bother you? I mean, you're an orphan, aren't you?

Nonsense. I just lost both my parents.

Don't worry, he'll catch on eventually.

- So what should we do, then? - Nothing.

We have to do something. Look at you, all apathetic.

Delphine, it's an orphanage.

It's a moot point.

An orphanage!

Yo, Dad. Am I disturbing you?

Always.

Just one more thing.

You know, at first, I was supposed to work until the bellboy recovered.

Figures. Five minutes later, it's all about you again.

But the deal was I'd fill in for the bellboy.

And now, not only has he recovered, but he doesn't work for you anymore.

Sorry, but that wasn't the deal. It was that you'd finally get your act together.

I'm busting my hump.

Stop! You're unbelievable!

You carry luggage! Please!

Still, the only hotel you're turning into an orphanage is the one where I work.

My poor boy. You're not the centre of the universe.

Enough.

- Why not house your orphans in another hotel? - I'm not going to school you on tax evasion.

To become such a powerful hotelier, you sometimes have to cross the line.

- So it's all monkey business. - You've never had a problem with it before.

- So you're a goddamn crook. - Right.

I'm a goddamn crook and you're a model of virtue!

You know what? Go back to your shallow existence instead of lecturing me?!

You'll pick it up.

Of course. Pick it up.

Nice credit card, huh?

You can do so much with it.

Buying feels so good.

Now turn around... and go.

Scram!

Bye, dear.

Shut the door.

Save the hotel.

Save the hotel.

Hey. Whose idea was this?

Selim. He's a graphic designer.

- A paid one! - Is it working?

Are clients concerned, or...?

You're not leaving without signing the petition!

No! Come on, sign it! Orphans won't serve you breakfast! Sign it!

- It's slow going. - Sign it!

Excuse me. Someone told me the hotel was closing.

- And it bothers you. You want to sign. - No... not really.

You do know we all work very hard to offer you a memorable stay?

She certainly does.

Yes, but your colleague also gave me this piece of hash.

I don't need it for the time being.

You don't sign, you don't smoke. Meryl Streep's lost it.

Ma'am, please help us save our jobs.

Especially since an orphanage is useless. I grew up in a big house

with many other kids with no parents, raised by a team of adults.

It was fine.

- So that's it, then? - But, um...

Go on, beat it!

Without media coverage, we're screwed.

I'm... I'm leaving.

You're so selfish! I don't even know why I'm surprised!

It's over anyway. What's the difference?

- Yeah, what's the difference? - You're being a coward! That's what!

You're abandoning your family. What, you want us to become orphans?

Any minute now.

Wait.

I'm an orphan.

Didn't think he'd catch on so fast.

Maybe it's not cool to deprive orphans of a home.

They're already orphaned.

It's too long to explain. What matters is that Will's a selfish jerk.

A back-stabber.

The back-stabber's leaving, so it's all good--

You're so damn selfish!

You're so damn selfless!

Nobody here gives a damn about you. They're just worried about their jobs.

If you left now, right now, they wouldn't say shit!

Nothing. Not a word.

But I'm the boss' son, so if I leave, I'm just a spoilt brat.

Fuck you.

See? I thought things couldn't get any worse, but I was wrong.

- Because they're worse. - Indeed.

So it was all for naught, sir?

I'm not cut out for this, Hubert.

Have you even tried fitting in?

I don't belong here. That's how it is.

So what, then?

You'll go back to your old life and pretend nothing happened here?

Hubert, my dad's a billionaire.

What can I do but enjoy it?

You know, sir,

a man often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it.

- What movie is that again? - Kung Fu Panda.

The first.

Excuse me. I'm looking for the restroom.

I'm looking for acknowledgement after busting my hump here for 14 years, so...

Check the bottom of the crapper. You'll find my career there.

You were welcome

At The Grand Hotel

An illustrious place

We thought immortal

But the doors will close

The curtain will fall on The Grand Hotel

It's the death knell

For our clientele

It's been swell

No more hotel It's now an orphanage

Farewell hotel It's now an orphanage

Hello? Hello. It's about the hotel that's closing.

We really need the media to discuss--

No, we're not taking in migrants.

No, they're brokers, CEOs, filthy-rich people--

Good news. Our number of supporters has doubled.

- Great! - There are now seven.

- Seven? - That's two times three.

- No, that's six. - What'd I say?

- Seven. - And you said?

Six.

Actually, it's four. Well, I guess.

Did you read the textbook I bought you?

So no one cares about this place, basically.

Leave me alone! This is my home.

Fuck, no.

Why are you following me? Enough!

Oh, my colleagues!

Well, my former colleagues.

Because thanks to my father, all this is going away! Whoosh!

How so? Can you elaborate?

You wanted media attention, you got it.

Yes, of course, we can elaborate.

This is a glaring example of abuse of power.

If we do nothing, dozens of people will lose their jobs.

- Exactly! - Excuse me. I have a question.

Yes, sir. What paper do you represent?

Thierry Jocelyn, head of the future orphanage.

And I wanted to personally thank our generous benefactor, Mr. Mazières.

I was told he was here.

You're demonstrating against an orphanage?

How could you?

- It's more complicated than that-- - Care to explain?

Bastard.

It's a heaven-sent gift

from the generous owner of the hotel, Mr. Mazières.

I thought we'd have to abandon these children,

but Mr. Mazières was,

as it were, the Messiah we were awaiting.

Pardon me.

Yeah, okay, but we're all on the verge of losing our jobs.

Understand?

Not Clémence.

'Cause she's an escort.

- Wait. There are escorts working here? - For fucksake!

I'm trying to sleep!

- Who's he? - Yes, escorts!

He's deranged.

We're all getting sacked because of his stupid orphans!

Enough!

Enough already!

Grand Hotel!

Please. If we could all spare a thought

for all the orphans who have been deprived of a mother and father.

Boring!

So we intend to create...

- We're not leaving until you cool off. - I am cool!!

This is no joke for you, huh?

It's hilarious. I'm laughing my ass off.

I mean, it must be tough on you. This hotel is your life.

Yes, it's my life. Pathetic.

Come on, it's not pathetic. You're just passionate.

About something nobody gives a shit about. So I'm kind of alone.

Come on, you're not alone. I'm here.

Yeah. I'm just another one of your lost causes.

William's right. You shouldn't be so selfless.

I can't help it.

I'm always trying to solve other people's problems, even my clients'.

So you don't have to think about your own.

I've been there.

What now?

I don't know. Spend time with my friends, I think.

Silly me! I don't have any.

Come on now.

No, it's true. I have no friends. Just colleagues. And they can't stand me.

Come on...

Ever heard the staff praise me?

Staff, no. But clients, yes. Often.

And that's because you're hard on the staff.

And, well, I'm here to cheer them up. So it's all good.

You have it easy. Everyone likes you. You're sweet and kind and pretty...

Really?

You think I'm pretty?

Of course!

Feel better?

Yes. You're good, you know.

I know.

You can go. The door's not locked.

I know. The bolts were removed in 2007.

And, by next month, more than 200 children

will be sheltered, fed, and smiling again.

And someday, hopefully, they will have a family of their own!

Wait!

This isn't over.

Look who's here.

Come on. What's the holdup?

- Robotel? - Robotel?

He has something to say.

How'd you get Robotel back?

He's family, bro. He's blood.

He insisted, saying: "I'd never leave you in the lurch."

Right?

He forced me to come, threatening to reformat my hard drive.

Shut the fuck up, or I swear I'll turn you into a Minitel!

Better watch out.

Far from home

You sometimes feel lost

You sometimes feel tense

You don't know where to go

You need a hotel

A place you love

With people you love

An atmosphere you love

More than people at your service

A bellboy or a front-desk clerk

They are your friends above all

United in this song

Fuck the orphanage

Fuck the orphanage.

Fuck the orphanage

We don't give a shit about them

No, we do give a shit--

We only want a permanent job Fuck the orphanage

Fuck the orphanage.

Fuck the orphanage

They have no parents That's not our concern

Live and learn

Fuck the orphanage

Fuck the orphanage.

For all the motherless little bastards. Big up!

Asshole!

- Here we go. - They didn't like it?

'Course not. Let's go, let's go.

Asshole!

You can go back to your old life. We're done for.

- I don't want to die! - Nobody's dying, Thomas.

Still!

I don't want the hotel to close.

We've had so much fun.

Remember the fake wedding?

- And that time we killed a guy? - Yes, the dictator.

Him too.

And the time Selim brought Robotel back to sing a song and save us from the orphanage?

And when someone stole all your luggage.

I remember. That was fun.

Oh, Thomas, it's alright. Come here.

What are you doing here? You want to really hit rock bottom?

Go ahead. You might just beat a world record. I'm listening.

I'm leaving and... I wanted to apologize.

- For? - Everything.

I know I wasn't the perfect son.

I see that now.

What, did you smoke a fatty?

Sorry for the way I acted. It's your business, not mine.

But we're billionaires.

Not "we." I'm a billionaire.

You're a freeloader.

Don't you have enough money?

I mean, why all the scheming?

We'll still be rich in five generations, so why not play fair?

Why? Why? Why? Because money begets money.

And shareholders expect year-end dividends.

And if you always play fair, the IRS takes half your money.

- You're stealing money? - Everybody does it.

You don't become a billionaire by following the rules.

Meaning?

In life...

...you can cheat.

Just don't get caught.

That's the first thing I learned.

You know what I learned as a bellboy?

No, but do tell.

You can fit a small adult into a suitcase.

- You're stealing money? - Everybody does it.

You don't become a billionaire by following the rules.

You sonofabitch.

See, I may be worthless...

...but don't mess with my hotel.

- Get all that? - Well, no. I wasn't recording.

- Wait-- - You sonofabitch!!

Mr. Mazières! Mr. Mazières, please!

What's going on, Mr. Mazières?

Why are you under arrest?

Thanks, William.

You saved the hotel.

No. We saved the hotel.

And, Selim, thanks for what you did.

It didn't actually work, but it was nice to see you do something for us.

What do you mean, "us"?

There is no "us" or whatever.

Family and whatnot.

I only did it to protect my turf.

You're just... collateral damage.

- What about the lyrics? - What? They're just ordinary lyrics.

Don't take me for a sensitive soul.

Okay, I'm out. Love you. No! What's wrong with me?

Anyway, after everything that's happened, I finally found a real family.

Oh, you're such...

Them. Over there.

They're really nice.

Hey, guys, we did good.

Where were you?

Hiding. I was afraid you'd beat me senseless.

What about Paris?

Yes, but with your dad behind bars,

my future's a bit uncertain.

Actually, my future may be in your hands. You might become the boss, right?

You could even fire me!

Kidding. You wouldn't, would you?

Wait. Why "in my hands"?

William Mazières, what are your plans for the hotel

now that your father is no longer head of the first hotel group in Europe?

Will you be taking over the empire?

A statement, Mr. Mazières?

William, could you say a few words? What's going to happen?