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>> Jon: [ Distorted ] WHAT
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HAPPENS WHEN YOU TAKE A FAMILY
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FROM THE WITNESS PROTECTION
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PROGRAM...
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>> Susan: MOVE THEM TO
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NEW YORK CITY...
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>> David: AND GIVE THEM THEIR
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OWN REALITY SHOW?
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>> * DA-DA-DA-DA, DO-DO
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>> Jon: PREVIOUSLY ON
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"DELOCATED"...
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>> I'M DIVORCED.
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>> Jon: WHAT'S HIS NAME?
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>> NEAL.
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>> WE WANT YOU TO START PICKING
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OFF EVERYONE AROUND HIM ONE BY
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ONE.
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>> FIRST YOU KILL THE SOUL, THEN
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YOU KILL THE MAN.
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>> "DELOCATED" WAS PITCHED AS A
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RATINGS STUNT FOR SWEEPS WEEK.
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>> Jon: FRRT.
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FRRT.
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FRRT.
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* BA-DA-BA BA-DA BA
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>> All: [ Distorted ] FRRT.
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[ BUZZING ]
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>> Jon: WHOO!
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[ BOTTLE HISSES ]
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YEAH!
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VIOLá!
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HOMEMADE SELTZER.
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[ Foreign accent ] HERE YOU GO,
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MADAM, THE BUBBLY.
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>> OUI, OUI, MONSIEUR.
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>> Jon: [ LAUGHS ]
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CHEERS -- WHERE EVERYONE KNOWS
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YOUR NAME.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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MMM!
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MMM-MMM-MMM-MMM-MMM.
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OH, YEAH. IS GOOD.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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>> SO, I, UM -- I HAVE SOME NEWS
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I NEED TO SHARE.
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>> Jon: MM-HMM?
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>> MY EX-HUSBAND, NEAL, GOT IN
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TOUCH WITH ME RECENTLY, AND
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WE'VE....BEEN E-MAILING...
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SORT OF A LOT LATELY.
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[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]
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>> UH-HUH. YEAH. RIGHT.
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YEAH. NO. YES. NO.
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YEAH, RATINGS, RATINGS, RATINGS.
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YEAH, I GET IT. I GET IT. YEAH.
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OKAY. ALL RIGHT. BYE.
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SORRY, GUYS. THAT WAS MY BOSS.
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SO, BIG SEASON FINALE.
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WHO'S GOT A BIG IDEA?
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WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
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SHOOT HIM?
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>> Jon: [ Normal voice ] MAYBE
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WE'LL DO A THING ABOUT HOW KIM
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IS HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH HER
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EX-HUSBAND, WHO SHE JUST TOLD ME
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SHE'S BEEN E-MAILING WITH BEHIND
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MY BACK.
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HOW ABOUT THAT?
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>> NOPE.
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THAT SOUNDS LIKE A TERRIBLE IDEA
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'CAUSE THAT WOULD BE A LIE.
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>> Jon: SO YOU'RE NOT E-MAILING
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HIM BEHIND MY BACK?
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>> I AM, BUT I'M NOT HAVING AN
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AFFAIR.
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>> O-H-H-H-H! SHIZIT!
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* SOUNDS LIKE WE GOT OUR SEASON
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FINALE *
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MM!
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* KIM'S EX-HUSBAND IN THE
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PICTURE *
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* AH, SHAKE YOUR BOOTY
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* DO IT ALL NIGHT
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* DO IT ALL NIGHT
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[ SCATTING ]
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GREAT IDEAS, GUYS.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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OH, DUDE, YOU GOT A SELTZER
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MAKER?
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[ SELTZER MAKER BUZZES ]
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[ LAUGHS ]
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SOUNDS LIKE FARTS!
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[ LAUGHING ]
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SEASON FINALE, LAST EPISODE.
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NEED SOMETHING BIG FROM YOU
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GUYS.
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I DON'T KNOW IF YOU HEARD OR
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NOT, BUT KIM'S EX-HUSBAND'S BACK
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IN THE PICTURE, AND JON'S EX,
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SUSAN, SHE'S ENGAGED.
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>> I'M GLAD TO HEAR JON'S LIFE
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IS PERSONAL HELL.
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>> ACTUALLY, JON IS, UH, GETTING
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ALONG PRETTY WELL.
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IF ANYBODY'S HAVING A HARD TIME
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OF IT, IT'S YOU GUYS.
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I MEAN, ALL THIS BEATING AROUND
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THE BUSH, KILLING EVERYBODY ELSE
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EXCEPT JON.
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I DON'T KNOW, MAN.
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IT'S KIND OF MAKING YOU GUYS
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LOOK LIKE PUSSIES.
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>> WHAT ABOUT SEASON FINALE FOR
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MY SHOW?
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>> I DON'T KNOW YVGENY.
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I MEAN, JUST KEEP DOING VODKA
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JOKES, I GUESS.
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IT NEVER GETS OLD.
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LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, JON FROM
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"DELOCATED" ATTEMPTS TO JUMP
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OVER A SHOPPING MALL ON A
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MOTORCYCLE FOR THE GREATEST
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SEASON FINALE OF ALL TIME!
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HERE HE GOES!
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[ IMITATES ENGINE ]
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OH, MY GOODNESS, NO!
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HE CLIPS THE TOP OF THE
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BUILDING, CRASHES TO THE GROUND!
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AND THERE'S GOT TO BE A LOT OF
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GASOLINE!
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OH, NO! HE'S ON FIRE!
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HE'S ON FIRE!
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HOLY [BLEEP]
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OH, MY GOD! LOOK AT HIM BURN!
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THE RATINGS ARE GOING CRAZY, AND
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THE MONEY IS ROLLING IN!
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WHEW!
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NOW, THAT'S A SEASON FINALE!
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SO, HOW ARE THINGS WITH YOU AND
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KIM?
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HEY, WHEN ARE WE GONNA MEET THIS
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NEAL GUY, HUH?
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YOU THINK HE'S CUTE?
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I HEARD HE'S GOT A NICE SLAB OF
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BEEF ON HIM -- THICK CUT.
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>> Jon: WHAT, LIKE HIS ABS?
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>> MNH-MNH.
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[ SLAPS DESK ]
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I GOT IT.
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BOTH OF YOU CAN ATTEMPT TO JUMP
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THE MALL, AND THE ONE WHO
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SURVIVES GETS KIM.
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>> Jon: THERE'S NOT GONNA BE A
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MOTORCYCLE STUNT, OKAY?
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WHY ARE WE EVEN -- WHY ARE WE
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EVEN TALKING ABOUT MANUFACTURING
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AN IDEA IN THE FIRST PLACE?
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LOOK, THINGS ARE COOL WITH ME
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RIGHT NOW, ALL RIGHT?
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I GOT MY SELTZER MAKER.
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I'M ENJOYING THAT.
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LIFE IS GOOD.
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I DON'T WANT TO PUSH THINGS.
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>> MM-HMM. THICK CUT.
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>> Jon: OKAY, LIFE IS, FOR THE
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MOST PART, GOOD.
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>> FINE, IF YOU'RE OKAY WITH
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LOSING KIM.
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[ SNIFFS ]
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MM! THAT'S MY SCENT!
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>> [ CHUCKLES ]
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>> PAPA...
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PAPA...
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>> SO, YOU GET THE GREEN LIGHT?
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>> NO.
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>> YOU KNOW, UM, WE WERE HAVING
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THIS BIG NETWORK MEETING THE
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OTHER DAY, AND SOMEBODY BROUGHT
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UP THE FACT THAT IF YOUR DAD
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GETS SHANKED IN THE SHOWER,
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YOU'D TAKE OVER AS HEAD OF THE
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FAMILY.
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[ GRUNTS ]
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>> I THINK YOU HAVE
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GODZILLA-MONSTER-SIZED BALLS TO
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ASK ME TO HAVE MY FATHER KILLED.
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>> [ GULPS ]
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>> AND I ADMIRE YOU FOR THAT,
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MIGHTY JOE JON.
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>> I ADMIRE YOU, TOO.
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LET'S GET THE [BLEEP] OUT OF
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HERE.
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>> Jon: KIM, I LOVE YOU, AND I
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DON'T WANT TO LOSE YOU.
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NOT TO NEAL, NOT TO ANYBODY, NO
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MATTER HOW THICK THEIR CUT OF
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BEEF IS.
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[ CLEARS THROAT ]
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>> [ GASPS ]
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OH, MY GOD.
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[ Laughing ] JON!
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[ LAUGHS ]
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>> Jon: OPEN IT.
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>> I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE
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ACTUALLY ENGAGED.
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>> Jon: UH...
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[ LAUGHS ]
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SLOW IT DOWN AND BACK IT UP.
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NOBODY SAID "ENGAGED."
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THAT IS NOT AN ENGAGEMENT RING.
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>> SO WHAT IS IT?
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>> Jon: IT IS A "NEXT LEVEL"
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RING.
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>> WHAT?
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>> Jon: WE ARE TAKING THINGS TO
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THE NEXT LEVEL.
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>> OF ENGAGEMENT?
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>> OF LEVELS.
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WE'RE AT A CERTAIN LEVEL NOW.
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HERE'S ENGAGEMENT.
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HERE'S THE NEXT LEVEL, OKAY?
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THAT'S WHERE YOU GOT TO GO
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BEFORE YOU GET ENGAGED,
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BABY DOLL.
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>> BUT THE TOP LEVEL IS USUALLY
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MARRIAGE, AND THE MIDDLE --
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>> Jon: WELL, YEAH.
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MARRIAGE IS UP HERE.
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HERE'S WHERE WE ARE.
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>> NO. DOWN.
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>> Jon: HERE'S ENGAGEMENT.
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>> AND THE MIDDLE IS ENGAGEMENT.
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>> Jon: SEE, THAT'S THE MISTAKE
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A LOT OF COUPLES MAKE, AND
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THAT'S WHY THE DIVORCE RATE IS
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SO HIGH.
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BABY, IT'S THE NEXT LEVEL.
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HOW ARE YOU NOT PSYCHED RIGHT
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NOW?
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I CAN'T -- I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
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>> ARE WE ENGAGED? YES OR NO.
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I NEED AN ANSWER RIGHT NOW.
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>> Jon: LISTEN, I MEAN, I
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HAVE -- YOU KNOW, THE STUNT IS
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GOING ON.
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>> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
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W-WHAT STUNT?
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>> Jon: THE MOTORCYCLE STUNT --
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THE SHOPPING MALL.
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I -- DID I -- I TOLD YOU ABOUT
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THAT, RIGHT?
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>> NO. NOPE.
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>> Jon: YES. COME ON.
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>> ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?
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YOU SAID YOU HATED THAT IDEA.
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>> Jon: YES.
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OKAY, I HATED THE IDEA, BUT I-I
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MET WITH MIGHTY JOE JON, AND
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HE'S LIKE, "YOU GOT TO DO THE
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STUNT!"
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I WAS LIKE, "NO!
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I WILL NOT DO THE STUNT!
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NO WAY!"
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BUT THEN IT FELT LIKE, "WAIT,
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THEY COULD CANCEL THE SHOW,"
266
00:08:54,101 --> 00:08:54,501
OKAY?
267
00:08:54,501 --> 00:08:56,071
SO JUST...LISTEN.
268
00:08:56,069 --> 00:08:57,569
I'M DOING THE STUNT.
269
00:08:57,571 --> 00:08:59,071
IT'S IN A WEEK.
270
00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:01,272
JUST GIVE ME A WEEK. PLEASE.
271
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:03,314
>> CONGRATULATIONS.
272
00:09:03,310 --> 00:09:06,350
YOU'VE BOUGHT YOURSELF A WEEK.
273
00:09:06,346 --> 00:09:08,216
>> Jon: TO THE NEXT LEVEL.
274
00:09:10,951 --> 00:09:12,491
>> TODAY WE'RE JUST GONNA GET
275
00:09:12,485 --> 00:09:14,315
YOU USED TO THE BIKE, AND THEN
276
00:09:14,321 --> 00:09:16,191
WE'LL DO SOME TRAINING JUMPS IN
277
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:17,119
A COUPLE DAYS.
278
00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:18,634
>> Jon: WHATEVER DELAYS THE
279
00:09:18,626 --> 00:09:20,126
ENGAGEMENT CONVERSATION!
280
00:09:20,127 --> 00:09:21,697
>> I'M PSYCHED YOU'RE ACTUALLY
281
00:09:21,695 --> 00:09:22,525
DOING THIS.
282
00:09:22,529 --> 00:09:24,299
>> Jon: YEAH, I'M, UH, KIND OF
283
00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:26,127
[BLEEP] MY PANTS RIGHT NOW, BUT
284
00:09:26,133 --> 00:09:27,973
I GUESS THERE'S NO TURNING BACK.
285
00:09:27,968 --> 00:09:29,138
>> YEAH. DEFINITELY.
286
00:09:29,136 --> 00:09:30,366
>> Jon: LET'S DO THIS!
287
00:09:30,370 --> 00:09:31,100
>> YES!
288
00:09:31,104 --> 00:09:32,044
[ ENGINE REVS ]
289
00:09:32,039 --> 00:09:35,009
>> Jon: ONE, TWO, THREE!
290
00:09:37,144 --> 00:09:38,354
>> [ LAUGHS ]
291
00:09:38,345 --> 00:09:40,475
COME ON, YOU BABY. GET UP.
292
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:42,320
>> YOU ALL RIGHT, JON?
293
00:09:42,315 --> 00:09:44,375
>> LET'S SET THIS UP AGAIN!
294
00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:47,394
>> HEY, BUDDY, YOU OKAY? JON?
295
00:09:47,387 --> 00:09:49,557
JON! JON!
296
00:09:49,556 --> 00:09:51,116
>> JON!
297
00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:52,494
>> COME ON, JON!
298
00:09:56,730 --> 00:09:58,070
[ MONITOR BEEPS ]
299
00:09:58,065 --> 00:09:59,895
>> SO THE BULLET ENTERED THROUGH
300
00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:01,570
THE LOWER BACK AND CAUSED --
301
00:10:01,568 --> 00:10:02,998
>> I'M SOR-- UH, A BULLET?
302
00:10:03,003 --> 00:10:04,813
I-I THOUGHT HE FELL OFF HIS BIKE
303
00:10:04,805 --> 00:10:05,835
AND HIT HIS HEAD.
304
00:10:05,839 --> 00:10:07,009
>> NO. HE WAS SHOT.
305
00:10:07,007 --> 00:10:08,707
THAT'S WHAT CAUSED HIM TO FALL
306
00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:09,639
OFF THE BIKE.
307
00:10:09,643 --> 00:10:10,583
>> HE WAS SHOT?
308
00:10:10,577 --> 00:10:11,907
>> YEAH.
309
00:10:11,912 --> 00:10:15,822
>> H-HE WAS SHOT?!
310
00:10:15,816 --> 00:10:17,416
>> IT MUST HAVE BEEN SERGEI.
311
00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:19,017
HE MUST HAVE FOUND OUT ABOUT THE
312
00:10:19,019 --> 00:10:19,889
SEASON FINALE.
313
00:10:19,887 --> 00:10:22,587
>> I'LL BE BACK.
314
00:10:22,589 --> 00:10:24,089
>> NOW, I'M SURE YOU'VE ALL
315
00:10:24,091 --> 00:10:25,931
HEARD THIS, BUT WE BELIEVE THAT
316
00:10:25,926 --> 00:10:27,726
PATIENTS IN A COMA CAN PROCESS
317
00:10:27,728 --> 00:10:29,098
SOUNDS, AND I ENCOURAGE FRIENDS
318
00:10:29,096 --> 00:10:30,696
AND FAMILY TO VISIT AS OFTEN AS
319
00:10:30,698 --> 00:10:31,868
YOU CAN.
320
00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:33,895
WITH THAT IN MIND, WE'VE ALSO
321
00:10:33,901 --> 00:10:36,001
MADE AN ALTERATION TO HIS EKG
322
00:10:36,003 --> 00:10:37,003
MACHINE.
323
00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:39,544
THIS SWITCH CHANGES THE SOUND
324
00:10:39,539 --> 00:10:42,039
THAT YOU'RE HEARING NOW TO THIS.
325
00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:45,052
[ MONITOR MAKING "FRRT" SOUND ]
326
00:10:45,045 --> 00:10:46,375
>> OKAY, I'M SORRY.
327
00:10:46,379 --> 00:10:47,879
SO YOU -- ARE YOU SAYING YOU
328
00:10:47,881 --> 00:10:49,581
HAVE NO IDEA WHEN HE'S GONNA
329
00:10:49,582 --> 00:10:50,552
COME OUT OF IT?
330
00:10:50,550 --> 00:10:52,050
>> OH, IT COULD BE TOMORROW.
331
00:10:52,052 --> 00:10:53,722
COULD BE 20 YEARS FROM NOW.
332
00:10:53,721 --> 00:10:54,861
WE JUST DON'T KNOW.
333
00:10:54,855 --> 00:10:56,085
>> 20 YEARS FROM NOW?!
334
00:10:56,089 --> 00:10:58,959
>> I'M SORRY, BUT, YOU KNOW,
335
00:10:58,959 --> 00:11:00,059
WHEN IN "COM."
336
00:11:00,060 --> 00:11:01,630
[ CHUCKLES SOFTLY ]
337
00:11:01,628 --> 00:11:02,728
>> EXCUSE ME?
338
00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:04,600
>> YOU KNOW, LIKE "WHEN IN
339
00:11:04,597 --> 00:11:08,937
ROME" -- WHEN IN "COM-A"?
340
00:11:08,936 --> 00:11:09,766
I'M SORRY.
341
00:11:09,770 --> 00:11:11,570
IT'S A JOKE I'VE BEEN TRYING.
342
00:11:11,571 --> 00:11:15,741
I SHOULD JUST STOP SAYING IT.
343
00:11:15,743 --> 00:11:18,083
>> [ SNIFFLES ]
344
00:11:18,078 --> 00:11:20,408
JON.
345
00:12:01,088 --> 00:12:04,088
>> HUH.
346
00:12:04,091 --> 00:12:05,591
OH.
347
00:13:15,162 --> 00:13:17,902
>> HEY, JON.
348
00:13:17,898 --> 00:13:19,068
WASSUP?!
349
00:13:19,066 --> 00:13:20,166
LISTEN, MAN.
350
00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:22,037
THE NETWORK IS UP MY ASS,
351
00:13:22,035 --> 00:13:22,995
ALL RIGHT?
352
00:13:23,003 --> 00:13:24,943
THEY WANT TO CANCEL THE SHOW.
353
00:13:24,938 --> 00:13:27,038
THIS IS LITERALLY DEATH TO THEM.
354
00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:28,210
BUT, UH...
355
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:30,108
MIGHTY JOE JON, HE PITCHED THEM
356
00:13:30,110 --> 00:13:31,880
AN IDEA, AND THEY LOVED IT.
357
00:13:31,879 --> 00:13:32,749
[ CHUCKLES ]
358
00:13:32,745 --> 00:13:34,675
WE'RE GONNA DO A RATINGS STUNT.
359
00:13:34,681 --> 00:13:37,051
IT'S GONNA BE CALLED "WHO WANTS
360
00:13:37,050 --> 00:13:39,220
TO WAKE A GUY IN A COMA AND
361
00:13:39,219 --> 00:13:40,919
BECOME A MILLIONAIRE?!?"
362
00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:41,551
YES.
363
00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:43,564
>> NO, YOU ARE NOT DOING A
364
00:13:43,556 --> 00:13:45,556
STUPID SWEEPS STUNT WITH JON
365
00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:46,688
WHILE HE'S IN A COMA.
366
00:13:46,693 --> 00:13:48,133
>> WELL, I'M SORRY YOU FEEL THAT
367
00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:49,728
WAY, KIM, BUT THE NETWORK HAS
368
00:13:49,729 --> 00:13:50,729
POWER OF ATTORNEY.
369
00:13:50,730 --> 00:13:52,230
THAT MEANS WE CAN DO WHATEVER WE
370
00:13:52,232 --> 00:13:53,572
WANT TO WITH HIM.
371
00:13:53,566 --> 00:13:55,036
MAYBE [SIGHS] WE'LL PUT HIS
372
00:13:55,035 --> 00:13:56,795
HOSPITAL BED ON A MOTORCYCLE AND
373
00:13:56,803 --> 00:13:58,973
HAVE HIM DO THAT JUMP.
374
00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:00,872
SEE YOU AT THE EMMYS,
375
00:14:00,874 --> 00:14:02,214
SWEEPY-HEAD!
376
00:14:02,209 --> 00:14:03,539
[ LAUGHS ]
377
00:14:07,747 --> 00:14:10,077
>> THAT'S A GUY IN A COMA, AND
378
00:14:10,083 --> 00:14:12,593
THAT'S A MILLION DOLLARS.
379
00:14:12,619 --> 00:14:15,219
AND THIS IS "WHO WANTS TO WAKE A
380
00:14:15,222 --> 00:14:17,162
GUY IN A COMA AND BE A
381
00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:18,287
MILLIONAIRE?!?"
382
00:14:18,325 --> 00:14:19,885
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
383
00:14:19,893 --> 00:14:22,733
[ UPBEAT THEME PLAYS ]
384
00:14:25,232 --> 00:14:28,242
>> Crowd: EW!
385
00:14:28,235 --> 00:14:30,765
>> [ BURPS ]
386
00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:32,970
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
387
00:14:32,973 --> 00:14:35,643
>> OKAY, AMERICA, LET'S WAKE HIM
388
00:14:35,642 --> 00:14:36,112
UP.
389
00:14:36,109 --> 00:14:39,649
[ LOUD MUSIC PLAYS ]
390
00:14:39,646 --> 00:14:40,806
[ GOATS BLEAT ]
391
00:14:40,813 --> 00:14:44,323
>> Crowd: AWW!
392
00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:46,687
[ AIR HORN BLARING ]
393
00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:49,356
[ LAUGHTER ]
394
00:14:49,356 --> 00:14:52,056
[ MEN ARGUING IN CHINESE ]
395
00:14:55,128 --> 00:14:56,998
[ BUZZER SOUNDS ]
396
00:14:56,997 --> 00:14:59,327
>> NO LUCK THIS WEEK.
397
00:14:59,332 --> 00:15:01,272
BUT THAT'S JUST THE WAY THE
398
00:15:01,268 --> 00:15:02,638
"COMA" CRUMBLES.
399
00:15:02,635 --> 00:15:03,635
[ LAUGHTER ]
400
00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:05,666
TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR ANOTHER
401
00:15:05,672 --> 00:15:07,812
EDITION OF "WHO WANTS TO WAKE A
402
00:15:07,807 --> 00:15:09,637
GUY IN A COMA AND BE A
403
00:15:09,642 --> 00:15:11,012
MILLIONAIRE?!?"
404
00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:12,354
GOOD NIGHT, AMERICA.
405
00:15:12,379 --> 00:15:14,379
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
406
00:15:14,381 --> 00:15:16,221
>> KIM, I HEAR YOU.
407
00:15:16,216 --> 00:15:17,946
IT'S FRUSTRATING.
408
00:15:17,985 --> 00:15:19,815
YEAH, BUT HE BASICALLY SIGNED
409
00:15:19,819 --> 00:15:21,019
HIS LIFE AWAY.
410
00:15:21,054 --> 00:15:22,664
>> WELL, WHAT IF JON AND I WERE
411
00:15:22,655 --> 00:15:23,115
MARRIED?
412
00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:24,323
>> WELL, YEAH, IF YOU WERE
413
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:25,864
MARRIED, WELL, THAT WOULD BE A
414
00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:27,058
WHOLE DIFFERENT SITUATION
415
00:15:27,060 --> 00:15:28,660
'CAUSE YOU WOULD HAVE A ROLE IN
416
00:15:28,661 --> 00:15:29,661
ALL DECISION MAKING.
417
00:15:29,662 --> 00:15:31,732
>> AND WHAT IF JON AND I WERE
418
00:15:31,731 --> 00:15:33,201
ABOUT TO GET MARRIED?
419
00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:35,170
COULDN'T I JUST, LET'S SAY,
420
00:15:35,168 --> 00:15:37,168
MARRY HIM WHILE HE'S IN HIS
421
00:15:37,170 --> 00:15:38,170
COMA?
422
00:15:38,171 --> 00:15:41,341
I MEAN, W-WE ARE ENGAGED.
423
00:15:41,341 --> 00:15:42,741
>> ISN'T THAT MORE OF A
424
00:15:42,742 --> 00:15:43,712
FRIENDSHIP RING?
425
00:15:43,710 --> 00:15:45,210
SO, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
426
00:15:45,212 --> 00:15:46,912
LIKE A WEDDING CEREMONY IN THE
427
00:15:46,913 --> 00:15:48,353
HOSPITAL ROOM -- THAT KIND OF
428
00:15:48,348 --> 00:15:48,978
THING?
429
00:15:48,982 --> 00:15:49,852
>> YEAH. YEAH.
430
00:15:49,849 --> 00:15:51,149
IS THERE A PRECEDENT FOR THAT?
431
00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:52,391
>> HEY, THERE'S PRECEDENT FOR
432
00:15:52,385 --> 00:15:53,085
EVERYTHING.
433
00:15:53,086 --> 00:15:53,916
[ BOTH CHUCKLE ]
434
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:54,350
>> GREAT.
435
00:15:54,354 --> 00:15:55,864
>> OH, NEXT WEEK, IF HE'S STILL
436
00:15:55,855 --> 00:15:57,185
IN THE COMA, I'M GONNA COME DOWN
437
00:15:57,190 --> 00:15:58,060
AND DO THE SHOW.
438
00:15:58,058 --> 00:15:58,758
[ CHUCKLES ]
439
00:15:58,758 --> 00:16:00,088
I'M GONNA GET RIGHT UP CLOSE TO
440
00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:01,363
HIM, RIGHT IN HIS EAR, AND I'M
441
00:16:01,361 --> 00:16:04,231
GONNA GO, "OBJECTION!"
442
00:16:04,231 --> 00:16:07,231
[ LAUGHS ]
443
00:16:07,234 --> 00:16:09,774
YOU KNOW, MILLION DOLLARS --
444
00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:12,109
KIND OF GOT TO DO IT.
445
00:16:12,105 --> 00:16:14,435
>> HEY, JON.
446
00:16:14,441 --> 00:16:16,411
HOW'S IT GOING?
447
00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:23,750
>> UH, HEY, JON.
448
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:27,090
>> OKAY. THANK YOU.
449
00:16:27,087 --> 00:16:29,087
I KNOW THIS ISN'T EXACTLY AN
450
00:16:29,089 --> 00:16:31,089
IDEAL TIME...
451
00:16:31,091 --> 00:16:32,961
BUT, UM...
452
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:33,959
>> [ CLEARS THROAT ]
453
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:36,060
KIM, DO YOU TAKE JON TO BE YOUR
454
00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:38,103
LAWFULLY WEDDED HUSBAND -- TO
455
00:16:38,098 --> 00:16:40,098
HAVE AND TO HOLD, FOR RICHER,
456
00:16:40,100 --> 00:16:42,200
FOR POORER, IN SICKNESS AND IN
457
00:16:42,202 --> 00:16:43,402
HEALTH?
458
00:16:43,403 --> 00:16:44,903
>> I DO.
459
00:16:44,904 --> 00:16:48,314
OH, UM, I MADE THIS OUT OF A
460
00:16:48,308 --> 00:16:51,008
PIECE OF YOUR SKI MASK.
461
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:57,750
>> JON, DO YOU TAKE KIM TO BE
462
00:16:57,750 --> 00:16:58,750
YOUR LAWFUL--
463
00:16:58,751 --> 00:17:01,051
>> Jon: NO.
464
00:17:01,054 --> 00:17:02,824
>> JON?
465
00:17:02,822 --> 00:17:03,922
[ GASPS ]
466
00:17:03,923 --> 00:17:04,463
JON!
467
00:17:04,457 --> 00:17:06,327
>> KIM?
468
00:17:06,326 --> 00:17:07,486
>> NEAL?
469
00:17:07,494 --> 00:17:10,234
>> HEY.
470
00:17:10,230 --> 00:17:11,130
>> Jon: NEAL?
471
00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:11,831
>> JON?
472
00:17:11,831 --> 00:17:13,471
>> Jon: YOU'RE THICK-CUT NEAL?
473
00:17:13,466 --> 00:17:15,166
>> NEAL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING
474
00:17:15,168 --> 00:17:15,498
HERE?
475
00:17:15,502 --> 00:17:17,102
>> I'VE COME TO ASK FOR YOUR
476
00:17:17,104 --> 00:17:18,074
HAND IN MARRIAGE.
477
00:17:18,071 --> 00:17:18,941
[ FLUTE PLAYS ]
478
00:17:18,938 --> 00:17:20,338
I KNOW THE TIMING ISN'T GREAT,
479
00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:22,010
BUT I THOUGHT JON WOULD STILL BE
480
00:17:22,008 --> 00:17:22,778
IN A COMA.
481
00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:24,175
>> Jon: YEAH, WELL, GUESS WHAT.
482
00:17:24,177 --> 00:17:25,907
I'M NOT IN MY COMA, SO MAYBE YOU
483
00:17:25,912 --> 00:17:27,252
SHOULD, UH...
484
00:17:27,247 --> 00:17:29,977
HEY, UH, GUY IN THE FLUTE, WOULD
485
00:17:29,982 --> 00:17:31,452
YOU TAKE A BREAK?
486
00:17:31,451 --> 00:17:34,151
TAKE FIVE.
487
00:17:34,154 --> 00:17:35,994
LIKE I WAS SAYING, WHY DON'T YOU
488
00:17:35,988 --> 00:17:37,018
GET OUT OF HERE?
489
00:17:37,023 --> 00:17:38,293
>> I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
490
00:17:38,291 --> 00:17:39,991
THAT BLACK GUY WITH THE BLOND
491
00:17:39,992 --> 00:17:41,792
HAIR CALLED ME A COUPLE MONTHS
492
00:17:41,794 --> 00:17:43,304
AGO AND TOLD ME TO GIVE YOU A
493
00:17:43,296 --> 00:17:43,856
CALL.
494
00:17:43,863 --> 00:17:44,963
>> MIGHTY JOE JON?
495
00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:45,474
>> YEAH.
496
00:17:45,465 --> 00:17:47,265
THAT'S WHY I GOT IN TOUCH WITH
497
00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:48,497
YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE.
498
00:17:48,501 --> 00:17:50,141
HE SAID IT WOULD BE A GREAT
499
00:17:50,137 --> 00:17:51,937
SEASON FINALE MOMENT IF I ASKED
500
00:17:51,938 --> 00:17:52,938
YOU TO MARRY ME.
501
00:17:52,939 --> 00:17:54,139
TOLD ME TO GO ALL OUT.
502
00:17:54,141 --> 00:17:55,881
SO I GOT THE FLUTE PLAYER AND
503
00:17:55,875 --> 00:17:56,435
THE HAWK.
504
00:17:56,443 --> 00:17:57,313
>> WHAT HAWK?
505
00:17:57,310 --> 00:17:59,150
>> IT FLEW AWAY ON THE WAY OVER.
506
00:17:59,146 --> 00:18:00,846
IT WAS GONNA FLY THE RING OVER
507
00:18:00,847 --> 00:18:01,347
TO YOU.
508
00:18:01,348 --> 00:18:02,848
IT WAS IN ITS TALONS.
509
00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,479
>> Jon: WOW, THAT'S TOO BAD,
510
00:18:04,484 --> 00:18:05,024
MAN.
511
00:18:05,017 --> 00:18:06,317
THAT SOUNDS AWESOME.
512
00:18:06,319 --> 00:18:07,989
THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN COOL.
513
00:18:07,987 --> 00:18:09,817
>> ANYWAY, UM, MIGHTY JOE JON
514
00:18:09,822 --> 00:18:11,462
LED ME TO BELIEVE THAT YOU AND
515
00:18:11,458 --> 00:18:13,288
JON WERE THROUGH, BUT, UH, IF
516
00:18:13,293 --> 00:18:15,163
THAT'S NOT THE CASE, I'LL LEAVE
517
00:18:15,162 --> 00:18:16,162
YOU TWO ALONE.
518
00:18:16,163 --> 00:18:17,833
>> Jon: YEAH, AND TAKE YOUR
519
00:18:17,830 --> 00:18:19,370
FLUTE MAN, GET OUT OF HERE.
520
00:18:19,366 --> 00:18:21,196
GO LOOK FOR THAT HAWK.
521
00:18:21,201 --> 00:18:23,171
FEED HIM YOUR THICK CUT.
522
00:18:23,170 --> 00:18:25,210
I GOT THIN CUT RIGHT HERE,
523
00:18:25,205 --> 00:18:26,565
MAN -- DELI THIN.
524
00:18:26,573 --> 00:18:27,973
[ LAUGHS ]
525
00:18:27,974 --> 00:18:31,484
>> UM, JON...
526
00:18:31,478 --> 00:18:33,508
DID YOU MEAN "NO" WHEN YOU SAID
527
00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:34,053
IT?
528
00:18:34,046 --> 00:18:36,046
>> Jon: KIM, I LOVE YOU BEYOND
529
00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:38,388
WORDS, OKAY?
530
00:18:38,385 --> 00:18:40,145
BUT I MADE A PROMISE TO MYSELF
531
00:18:40,153 --> 00:18:41,853
THAT I WOULD NEVER GET MARRIED
532
00:18:41,854 --> 00:18:42,324
AGAIN.
533
00:18:42,322 --> 00:18:43,862
YOU DON'T WANT TO MARRY A
534
00:18:43,856 --> 00:18:45,486
PROMISE-BREAKER, RIGHT?
535
00:18:48,495 --> 00:18:51,355
>> WELL, THEN, I GUESS IT'S
536
00:18:51,364 --> 00:18:53,004
OVER.
537
00:19:01,608 --> 00:19:06,178
>> HO...MAN.
538
00:19:06,179 --> 00:19:11,049
GIRL WAKES UP GUY IN A COMA WITH
539
00:19:11,050 --> 00:19:12,390
A MARRIAGE PROPOSAL.
540
00:19:12,385 --> 00:19:14,385
GUY SAYS "NO."
541
00:19:14,387 --> 00:19:18,057
GIRL WINS A MILLION DOLLARS.
542
00:19:18,057 --> 00:19:19,887
>> Jon: WHAT -- MILLION DOLLARS?
543
00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:21,262
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
544
00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:22,901
>> LOOK, JON, I KNOW YOU'RE
545
00:19:22,895 --> 00:19:24,355
BUMMED, BUT HERE'S TO A GREAT
546
00:19:24,364 --> 00:19:25,274
SEASON FINALE.
547
00:19:25,265 --> 00:19:26,895
I COULDN'T HAVE THOUGHT OF A
548
00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:28,069
BETTER WAY TO TOP IT.
549
00:19:28,067 --> 00:19:30,567
>> I CAN.
550
00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:32,940
JUST RELAX.
551
00:19:32,939 --> 00:19:35,209
DO NOT CALL FOR ROB UNLESS YOU
552
00:19:35,208 --> 00:19:36,908
WANT HIM TO ALSO DIE,
553
00:19:36,909 --> 00:19:40,409
UNDERSTAND?
554
00:19:40,413 --> 00:19:42,283
I'M SORRY WE HAVE REACHED THIS
555
00:19:42,282 --> 00:19:44,982
MOMENT.
556
00:19:44,984 --> 00:19:48,324
BUT THINK OF LIKE THIS.
557
00:19:48,321 --> 00:19:50,321
I HAVE BEEN EATING MEAL FOR A
558
00:19:50,323 --> 00:19:52,663
VERY LONG TIME.
559
00:19:52,659 --> 00:19:54,659
FIRST...
560
00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:57,661
WAS APPETIZER.
561
00:19:57,664 --> 00:19:59,404
THEN...
562
00:19:59,399 --> 00:20:01,929
WAS SALAD.
563
00:20:01,934 --> 00:20:03,604
THEN...
564
00:20:03,603 --> 00:20:06,443
WAS SOUP.
565
00:20:06,439 --> 00:20:07,969
THEN...
566
00:20:07,974 --> 00:20:10,484
WAS CHICKEN.
567
00:20:10,477 --> 00:20:15,177
THEN COLESLAW.
568
00:20:15,181 --> 00:20:19,191
NOW THAT MEAL IS OVER, I'M READY
569
00:20:19,185 --> 00:20:22,015
FOR HOT FUDGE SUNDAE.
570
00:20:22,021 --> 00:20:24,461
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
571
00:20:24,457 --> 00:20:26,287
WE HAVE SIMPLY REACHED END OF
572
00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:27,433
LINE.
573
00:20:29,362 --> 00:20:31,702
[ SILENCED GUNSHOT ]
574
00:20:31,698 --> 00:20:33,098
>> [ Strained ] WHOA.
575
00:20:33,099 --> 00:20:34,599
AWESOME TWIST.
576
00:20:38,671 --> 00:20:40,541
>> [ SIGHS ]
577
00:20:40,540 --> 00:20:43,280
MIGHTY JOE JON.
578
00:20:43,276 --> 00:20:45,446
HE TRY TO TELL ME HOW TO RUN MY
579
00:20:45,445 --> 00:20:46,475
FAMILY.
580
00:20:46,479 --> 00:20:49,279
HE TRY TO GET ME TO KILL MY
581
00:20:49,282 --> 00:20:51,282
FATHER.
582
00:20:51,284 --> 00:20:52,994
HE HAD SOMEONE SHOOT YOU ON
583
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:56,985
MOTORCYCLE AND BLAME ME.
584
00:20:56,989 --> 00:21:01,489
[ LAUGHS ]
585
00:21:01,494 --> 00:21:05,004
RELAX.
586
00:21:04,997 --> 00:21:06,667
I'M NOT FINISHED EATING YOUR
587
00:21:06,666 --> 00:21:07,996
MEAL.
588
00:21:10,703 --> 00:21:14,373
NOT TIME FOR DESSERT JUST YET.
589
00:21:28,187 --> 00:21:32,017
>> Jon: [ SOBS ]
590
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:36,330
>> BARTENDER...
591
00:21:36,329 --> 00:21:38,159
MAY I HAVE A VO--
592
00:21:39,231 --> 00:21:41,071
[ "WHO WANTS TO WAKE A GUY IN A
593
00:21:41,067 --> 00:21:42,197
COMA AND BECOME A
594
00:21:42,201 --> 00:21:45,171
MILLIONAIRE?!?" THEME PLAYS ]
35969
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