Original subtitles

♪ Hakuna Matata ♪

♪ What a wonderful phrase ♪

♪ Hakuna Matata ♪

♪ Ain't no passing craze ♪

♪ It means no worries ♪

♪ For the rest of your days ♪

♪ It's our problem-free ♪

♪ Philosophy ♪

♪ Hakuna Matata ♪

♪ Yeah! ♪

♪ Hakuna Matata! ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa! ♪

♪ Hakuna Matata! ♪

♪ It means no worries ♪

♪ For the rest of your days ♪

♪ It's our problem-free ♪

♪ Philosophy ♪

♪ Hakuna Matata ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa ♪

You know, for once I wish that hog would bring home the bacon.

Knowing Pumbaa, he's probably asleep under a tree, snoring up a storm and...

getting his neck measured?

Two possibilities here.

Possibility one, Pumbaa's getting fitted for a bow-tie 'cause he's getting married

or two, Pumbaa's getting fitted for a noose 'cause he's getting hanged!

- Pumbaa! - Wait! What? Wait! Who?

Your criminal past has caught up with you!

You gotta run or they'll hang your hide.

Pumbaa, next time try running away!

Do you mind? My name is Mr. Buttons.

I have no intentions of hanging anyone's hide.

And quite frankly, I resent the accusation.

Yeah? Well, Buttons, riddle me this.

What were you doing sizing this here hog neck for a noose?

Well, I was taking measurements for his tuxedo and bow tie.

Mr. Pumbaa is not getting executed, he's getting married.

There's a difference?

No offense, but I don't wanna marry you.

Not me!

I am only here to make certain this

wedding is carried out in strict accordance

with the revered warthog traditions and bylaws

as stipulated in this book.

So you're getting married?

And when were you planning to tell me?

But I didn't know I was getting married.

It is a prearranged marriage, decided and set in stone

years before Mr. Pumbaa was even born.

And now, it is my duty and distinct pleasure

to present Mr. Pumbaa's bride to be...

Come out now, Miss Rosebud. It's alright.

Rosebud, this is Mr. Pumbaa,

the warthog you're going to marry.

And that's Mr. Pumbaa's friend.

It's it's a... pleasure to meet...

Alright now, you can get to know Mr. Pumbaa later.

It's been a long day and you need to rest.

The ceremony is at at 12:00 noon tomorrow.

Don't you dare be one second late!

We'll be there! Yeah, bye-bye.

Let's get out of here. We can be miles away by noon tomorrow.

Gee, Timon, I don't if I should defy warthog traditions.

They're important for the cultural identity that connects

one generation of warthogs to the next.

Stop it, Pumbaa! You're creeping me out.

Well, getting married is a tradition.

Pumbaa, forget the lousy tradition.

If you get married, you will never hunt bugs, sing songs or go on wacky,

high jinks-filled adventures with your loyal and devoted pal, Timon, ever again!

Gee, I wouldn't like that.

Don't worry, Pumbaa. I'll find you a way out of this wedding.

For you benefit and for the benefit of all freedom-loving,

armpit-scratching, bug-eating brothers everywhere!

How are you going to do that, Timon?

There's always a loophole, Pumbaa. The challenge is knowing where to find it.

Maybe it's in Mr. Button's Big Book of Warthog Traditions and Bylaws.

Save your strength, Pumbaa and leave the challenges to me.

I mean it takes a superior intellect like myself to know there's only one place

we'll find the aforementioned loophole.

There, in Mr. Button's Big Book of Warthog Traditions and Bylaws.

I'll ask if we can borrow it.

Pumbaa, when you go looking for a loophole,

you have to be deceitful and underhanded, or else it doesn't count.

How are we going to get that book without waking up Mr. Buttons?

We'll have to replace it with a similar type object, of equal or same size.

I know!

We'll use your copy of the Warthog Traditions and Bylaws.

"Holiday hog traditions, summer swine socials...

jungle tea parties, hoof clapping."

Here we go! "Warthog weddings!"

"Tradition allows the groom absolutely no say in who he marries, when he marries

or whether he even wants to marry."

"It is the bride's special day and there is no way you can get out of it, buddy."

Whoa!

Pumbaa, I found it! I found the loophole!

"If the bride decides, with justifiable cause,

that she cannot love her designated husband

due to ill-mannered behavior,

unacceptable personal appearance or foul body odor,

she can call the wedding off!"

Well, that settles it.

It does?

Okay, Pumbaa, your motivation is a compulsive

desire to be absolutely disgusting.

I want rude, I want crude, I want bad manners... go!

No, no, no, sorry, Pumbaa.

I'm not feeling the wretchedness, the squalor.

From the top again, please!

But Timon, those are the worst manners I've got!

They're awful!

Awful is not good enough. We're going for atrocious!

Timon, can I come out now?

Alright, come on out!

Keep soaking.

But Timon, I've been soaking in this smelly mud hole

eating stinkbug burritos for an hour!

I smell terrible!

Terrible won't cut it, Pumbaa.

We're going for horrendous!

But it's almost noon and Mr. Buttons warned us not to be one second late!

You are two hours late!

Go on.

Yeah! Well, that's the kind of pig I am!

He don't play by the rules.

I'm my own hog

and nothing's going to cramp my style.

What do you think of that, sister?

What is that smell?

Why, that'd be me!

Well, now then, shall we begin?

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to witness

the sacred union of these two warthogs in wedded matrimony.

If anyone has reason to believe they should not be married,

speak now or forever hold your..."

Excuse me.

No! There is no excuse!

The warthog wedding is a time-honored tradition

and you've made a mockery of it.

Your manners are atrocious

- and... - And his personal appearance?

Repulsive!

Attaboy, Pumbaa!

This is an outrage!

What can you do?

This prearranged wedding is part of a respected warthog

tradition. I mean, it's not like there's some big loophole

on page 346 of that big book of yours.

But there is!

There is?

The wedding can be called off entirely if the bride doesn't love the groom.

And how on Earth could Rosebud love

that sloppy, smelly, ill-mannered pig?

With all my heart.

- Who said that? - I did!

I am the bride.

Shouldn't I decide if I'm in love with Mr. Pumbaa or not?

Well, technically.

But there must be a way around that!

Well, there's always a loophole...

But I'm crazy in love with Pumbaa.

You are?

Pumbaa does everything I've never been able to do.

Dress weird, talk back, smell bad and live wild!

But that's not me! Except for the smelling bad part.

I'm nothing but a fraud!

He put the phony in baloney!

I'm not a wild biker hog! I'm kind, sincere and down-to-earth!

He's sensitive and caring and not afraid to cry.

I like smelling the flowers, catching raindrops on my tongue.

Wedding's off.

It is?

I need me a hog who lives on the edge. The wilder, the better!

So now he's not good enough for ya?

Well, you'll never find a husband that's half the hog that Pumbaa is!

Look no further, Rosebud!

I'm your man! Rugged and untamed!

I beg your pardon. I'm an animal!

I stink!

I love...

Run, Pumbaa! We may be cowards, but we're fast cowards.

Retention, retreat, these actions are futile against I, Congo Quint.

The bravest, strongest, most adventurous adventurer west of the Great Rift Valley.

Psst, Timon, I think I'm wearing diapers.

Shush.

But I haven't worn diapers since I was a wee, little, tiny baby.

Will you shush?

Hey and I'm wearing a dress too!

- Shush! - But I look like a little girl!

Pumbaa, be quiet! You want to get us caught?

Hi, there.

Attainment, trophy, worthy achievement!

Pumbaa, there's a gorilla in our midst.

What precious little babykins!

I have always wanted my own little sugar plum dumplings and now I've got you,

I could die!

Big hug! Big hug! Loving you!

You little buttercup, sweetie pies! Look at you. Look at you!

You must be so tired and hungry and cold. Forget about it.

You just lie down. I'll forage some bananas

that'll put hair on your little chests and your arms and your legs

and your little tootsies, look at you!

I can't stand it! You'll be just like mommy!

Timon...

Quiet Pumbaa! I'm trying to figure out why this gorilla is treating us like babies?

Hey...

Pumbaa!

The reason this gorilla is treating us like babies

is because she thinks we're babies!

No!

Yes! And this gives me a great idea.

Don't you see? Don't you get it? Don't you realize what we've got here?

Yeah! We've got me in a dress!

Pumbaa, Pumbaa, Pumbaa!

We have got ourselves an 800 pound gorilla bodyguard,

who is going to keep us, her little buttercup, sweetie pies,

safe from trigger-happy Bungalow Bill out there!

Timon!

Don't give me the shocked warthog look.

This is perfect! We make like baby apes

and we're safe as houses!

It'll be a piece of, you know, layers... with frosting...

- Cake? - No thanks, I already ate.

I already ate!

This is a tough room. Just relax. This is foolproof.

What could possibly go wrong?

Clutch the purse, my gracious, for me?

Correctimo.

I, an absolutely normal ape,

have adored you from afar for countless years and now I have come

to ask for your hand, in marriage!

My! This is all so sudden, I couldn't possibly...

let me fix my face, we'll leave immediately!

Would you keep an eye on my little bambino infant-tots

for a teenie-tiny moment?

A rival for mom's affections.

Make like a baby.

At last! Congo Quint has you!

Mr. Lucky, ta-da!

I can't stand it! This is so sweet!

Look at their little punums. They like you too.

And I like them.

Brainstorm! How about I take the babies for a long walk?

Just me and them, we'll get to know each other better.

Big ape to little ape and ape-ette.

So... that big mister man thinks he can mess with my little buttons,

sweetums, does hims? Ho! Ho!

Well, I won't let anything get my little baby spots. No, no, no.

You'll be safe and sound right here, where I can protect you.

See, what'd I tell 'ya?

I don't know, Timon.

I feel like the biggest liar in the whole world.

- It's not nice to lie. - Nice?

Excuse me, Pumbaa of Sunnybrook Farm.

You think that hunter is concerned with "nice"?

The only "nice" thing he's thinking is how "nice" we'll taste

with a side of coleslaw and a root beer.

Besides, nice guys finish last.

Ooh and there's big smile.

Perfect!

And just in time!

I've got a surprise for my precious little babies who love me!

And mama loves them, too, yes I do!

Timon...

I don't the looks of this.

Pumbaa, obviously this is some type of special occasion.

Look at those little angels! They're so cute!

You look up "cute" in the dictionary, there are these children.

They're the cutest babies in the entire cartoon.

What'd I tell 'ya?

Now for the surprise. Are you ready? Are you ready?

Come play...

With your new friends!

Go ahead, go ahead. You should play nice.

Excuse me, I don't want to sound inhospitable,

but I've got something to confess.

Excuse me a moment, mom.

Just a few private words with my sibling here.

Pumbaa, what do you think you're doing?

I can't go through with it, Timon. We're not her babies!

What we're doing is dishonest and it's going to get us killed!

I've got to tell her the truth.

Pumbaa, old buddy, no! The truth is a dangerous, deadly thing.

Believe me, sometimes it's better to tell a lie.

In fact, most times it's better to lie.

Well that's for me to decide! And I've decided to tell the truth.

Fine, go tell.

Missus Gorilla lady...

I...

You see, the thing is, we're not babies.

We were just acting like babies.

That way we could take advantage of your maternal instincts

for our own personal safety and comfort.

You see, Timon, honesty is the best policy.

Ha! Jubilation! Congo Quint has done it!

There's no one to stop me this time.

Happy, Pumbaa?

This is what you get for telling the truth.

Congo Quint has done it!

The world's first and only picture of a warthog and a meerkat together.

Celebrational!

This photo in my name, "Congo Quint,"

will grace the cover of every newspaper in the world.

Congo Quint is the bravest, strongest, most resourceful

photographer on this, or any other, continental plate.

Pumbaa, I've just had the most remarkable idea.

Smile! Great! Work with me!

♪ Yummy, yummy, yummy, I've got bugs in my tummy ♪

♪ And I feel like munching you ♪

♪ Bugs are such a sweet thing Good enough to eat thing ♪

♪ That's just what I'm gonna do ♪

♪ Ooh, I love to hold ya ♪

♪ Ooh, I love to kiss ya ♪

♪ Ooh, love, I love 'em so ♪

♪ Sweeter, sweeter than sugar ♪

♪ Bugs, I won't let them go ♪

♪ Yummy, yummy, yummy, I've got bugs in my tummy ♪

♪ And as sickening as it may seem ♪

♪ Nutrition's what their givin' It's what keeps me livin' ♪

♪ And they taste just Like peaches and cream ♪

♪ Kinda like sugar ♪

♪ Kinda like spices ♪

♪ Kinda like... ♪

♪ But they do ♪

♪ Kinda sounds funny ♪

♪ But love, honey ♪

♪ Honey, I love you ♪

♪ Yummy, yummy, yummy, I've got bugs in my tummy ♪

♪ And one more will satisfy ♪

♪ Love, you're such a sweet thing ♪

♪ Good enough to eat thing ♪

♪ Sweet thing that ain't no lie ♪

♪ I love to hold ya, love to kiss ya ♪

♪ I love you so ♪

♪ No ♪

♪ Love is sweeter, Sweeter than sugar ♪

♪ Love, I won't let... ♪

Stink bug!