Original subtitles

I'm so excited. I'm so excited!

Let me guess. You're still squealing about the fact

That we're going on "gotcha with gilroy smith" together?

Yes, this is my first talk show. It's gonna be so much fun.

Sweetie, when you've been in hollywood as long as I have,

You'll realize talk shows are no big whoop.

Gilroy will ask us some questions.

- We'll tell amusing stories. - And we will be adorable.

You know what, tawn? I thought that I'd be nervous tonight,

But with you by my side, I've got nothing to worry about.

So how many talk shows have you done before?

None. This is my first one. Aren't you nervous?

Well, I am now. Why would you tell me that?

Here we go, girls. I cannot tell you how happy I am

To have the two of you on my show tonight.

Honestly, gilroy, we're thrilled.

Well, enjoy your gift baskets,

i>- - and I'll see you in a few minutes.

Oh, hey, you can watch. I'm gonna do a promo for tonight's show.

Cool. Look at the gift baskets. They're so nice.

Next on " gotcha with gilroy smith"...

They're funny, they're cute...

- I call funny. - Dibs on cute.

...They're "so random"'s tawni hart and sonny munroe tonight.

I call sonny.

We'll ask them some questions and with any luck,

We'll get 'em to say something super personal

And super embarrassing.

Are we on the right show?

It's the number-one talk show in america, sonny. Girl up.

That's "gotcha with gilroy smith."

It's like a talk show that punches you right in the neck.

-

* off to the races, I'm going places *

* might be a long shot, not gonna waste it *

* this is the big break and it's calling my name *

* yeah! *

* so far, so great, get with it *

* at least that's how I see it *

* having a dream is just the beginning *

* so far, so great, believe it *

* can't take away this feeling *

* taking a ride with chance on my side *

* yeah, I can't wait *

* so far, so great *

i>- * so far, so great * -

Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com

♪ yaooww! ♪

I wait my whole life for my first talk show appearance

And I'm on the one that gets you?

I know.

I'm considering stabbing myself in the leg

With a fork just to get out of it.

I already tried it with a spork, but it broke.

Stupid spork. Not a spoon, not a fork,

Can't get me out of an evil talk show. What good are you?

Still, he did get us gift baskets.

If he thinks he can trick us

Into letting our guard down by giving us--

Hey, chocolate covered walnut clusters!

Sweet! - I love these. You want one?

Me too. Yeah. -

Gotcha!

That guy...

Is not to be trusted. We need to make a pact.

When we're out there, we've got each other's backs.

- Right. - Team sonny and tawni.

Okay, like this. And then...

i>- High five. High five it. -

Give it up, ladies and gentlemen,

For gilroy smith!

Welcome, everybody.

Okay, we have got some great guests tonight.

Brad and angelina...

-...Not on the show. -

But before we bring out our actual guests,

Let's take a look at them doing their thang

On "so random!"

Check it out. I'm still at work.

Check it out. Me too and I'm so bored.

Excuse me, would one of you mind hanging up the phone

And helping me?

Check it out. I have to go. I have an annoying customer.

Check it out. Me too and she's a hippie.

- Check it out dance? - Check it out dance.

* they're the best of friends with the worst of 'tudes *

* they're the check it out girls *

* and they're checking out for you *

* check it out! *

Give it up for tawni hart and sonny munroe.

Get over there.

Girls, you're sitting

Pretty far away there. You a little nervous?

Nervous? No.

We're just really really close.

Yeah, and one of us has a very bony knee.

Come on, the person next to the host gets the most screen time.

Whew! And there's better lighting too.

You two seem to have a lot of fun, and you work really well together.

Who don't you work well with?

Pfft. We all love each other.

Pfft. What she said.

I'm talking nico and grady. Come on.

I'm guessing they're idiots.

No no, they're not idiots.

A hint of scabanero peppers,

The hottest pepper known to man

And security guards.

Perfecto!

- Hot lips. - Huh?

Hot lips, hot lips, hot lips!

Oh, here she comes.

The snake has been released

And it's huge! -

What you doing, man? There's a snake on the loose.

- No. - Fine, I get it.

You like nico and grady,

But don't they get on each other's nerves? - Sometimes.

But when they do argue,

It's over something really meaningful.

How come you get to be the chicken anyway?

Because I have more of a chicken body,

And you have more of an egg body.

It's not fair.

I always have to play the thing that comes out of you.

No, no, I come out of you sometimes.

Oh, please. You played the mother, I played the baby.

You played the stomach, I played the barf.

I was on a roll.

Level 9 is not a roll.

Yeah, well, of course you'd say that.

You can't get past level 5. -

Your game stinks.

- My game stinks? - Uh-huh, uh-huh!

At least I've got a game where it counts. You never kissed a girl.

Oh, guys, come on, this is so--

Really? Never kissed a girl?

You know I'm waiting for just the right lady.

They're great guys.

You know, they don't just walk into a room, gilroy.

They make an entrance.

Man, this isn't "mackenzie falls."

Okay, I'm not really getting the smack talk about the boys.

What about zora? She seems pretty weird.

Pfft!

- Zora? - Weird?

If by "weird, " you mean "adorable." duh!

Ha! It works!

My cold cut catapult works.

I see it also works with cheese.

In fact, zora may be tiny,

But she makes a big first impression.

Don't you knock?

And don't forget, she's great with kids.

- Oh, yeah. - Great.

Little girl setting herself up for failure.

How precious.

Zora, zora, zora, zora!

Blossom scouts do not bark at little girls.

It's not in the handbook.

- Are we doing this? - Oh, we're doing this.

Whoa, whoa!

So no idiots, no weirdos?

That's the story you're sticking with?

- You betcha. - That's terrific.

We'll be right back with sonny munroe and tawni hart

On "gotcha with gilroy smith."

You girls are giving me nothing!

Oh, really?

That's just the way that we roll. Ain't that right, tawni?

Yep.

The weird thing is everybody knows you two don't get along.

You don't even have a handshake you can agree on.

It's almost as if you made a pact backstage

Before the show started.

- - that's ridiculous, gilroy.

- - and we're back

With exclusive backstage footage

Shot with our hidden gift basket "gotcha" cam.

Let's roll the footage and watch these two make a pact.

We need to make a pact. When we're out there, we've got each other's backs, okay?

- Tawni: Right. - Team sonny and tawni.

Gotcha!

- She made me do it. - Tawni, we had a pact.

Pact's off. We're dealing with a man

Who puts cameras in gift baskets.

I've got nothing to hide.

I'm just a girl from wisconsin who got a shot

At being on her favorite hit tv show and her dream came true.

When I was four, I overfed my best friend's goldfish

And it exploded.

I'm sorry, becky.

Tawni, I don't think that was the kind of secret he was looking for.

Come on, tawni fessed up to something...

Stupid, but still, there was fessing.

No one makes a pact

Unless they've got something they wanna hide.

S-sometimes they do.

Do they, sonny? Do they really?

Do they, sonny? Do they really?

'cause sometimes I heard

You get to have that perfect dance

With that one special person.

Just gonna have to settle for me.

This is sweet.

I have my moments.

You gotta press "play."

Oh, right. Sorry.

And when we return, we'll figure out what sonny was thinking about

When she made that weird face that looked like

She was thinking about something.

You're watching " gotcha with gilroy smith."

Becky, I'm sorry. I'll get you another goldfish.

Fine, I'll get you a designer purse--

Gold like the fish I killed.

Tawni, I think we need to recommit ourselves to the pact.

Gilroy's really freaking me out.

Have some cookie dough. It'll help you relax.

Thank you.

- This is good. - Right?

Really good.

I just wanna get through this ridiculous show

Without saying something embarrassing I'm gonna regret.

And we're back.

So what did you guys do on your break?

Did you have some cookie dough? Did you make another pact?

Of course we made another pact.

The cast of "so random! " sticks together through thick and thin.

We've made pacts that sonny wasn't even a part of.

You have?

Let's do this thing! -

- This is why I don't trust. - Why are we dressed like this?

Because we're on a mission. We need disguises. Now back in your poses.

- - ow! Stop shocking me.

Sorry. I haven't yet mastered my powers.

My hair itches.

I have never felt more free.

I was born to wear a cape.

- - ow!

What was that for?

I just mastered my powers.

Now back in your poses.

Gilroy, why don't you ever ask questions like,

"what's your favorite ice cream?"

Or "what's your favorite dog combination?"

Labradoodle. - Chocopoo, which is a combination

Of ice cream and a dog.

It's the ice cream that licks itself.

Yeah, back to the dirt.

In the latest issue of "tv weekly" with this handsome fella on the cover,

Sonny said that, and I quote,

"tawni hart is a drama queen prone to throwing diva fits."

What? I didn't say that.

I know. I just made that up. But is she?

Are you thinking about it?

Oh my gosh, she's actually thinking about it.

You're actually thinking about it.

Hey, tawn, you ready to go back to rehears--

You shaved your head.

Actually, it's a bald cap,

But symbolically yes,

I did shave my head.

If I don't have the best hair,

I may as well not have any hair at all.

- Stop thinking about it. - I didn't say anything.

- But you were thinking. - What were you thinking about?

I was thinking about how

When I came to "so random!"

Tawni and I were like this.

Don't need another girl! I'm the funny girl.

And the pretty one!

Let's think of this studio as a school.

I'm the head cheerleader, and you're the new kid.

And you're all gung-ho and wanting to join the squad.

You've got all these great ideas and you're full of enthusiasm.

- Yeah, that's right. I am. - Well, knock it off!

I can't believe you stabbed me.

I didn't stab you. You stabbed yourself.

You just stood there and watched, which is just like stabbing,

So it's really your fault. I knew you were out to get me.

I'm not out to get you. Here, you need to rinse it off.

Really? 'cause the way I read it was more like,

"I hope she gets kicked off the show."

That is the worst tawni impression I've ever heard.

So that face you made.

I know that face.

That is the face of a girl who's got a boy crush.

So who is it?

Is it nico?

No no no. I mean, we went to the movies once,

But it was just as friends.

And he had the best time.

It's not just a tiara.

It's a key that opens a door

To a secret unicorn stable.

I don't know what any of those words mean.

it's just...

So special.

Do you need a tissue?

I'm good.

Nico.

Nico and I are just friends.

Okay, all right.

How about grady?

I love grady, but grady needs a really classy girl.

He has really refined tastes.

Get him out.

I guess we know what the pan's used for.

He made me an omelet yesterday.

So what's your impression of chad dylan cooper?

Because I heard he made quite an impression on sonny.

- Oh. - He did?

Um... How long is this show?

It'd feel shorter if you'd spill a little bit.

About chad dylan cooper? There's nothing to spill.

I heard the first time you two met

He stole your heart.

stole my heart?

What? He did not steal my heart.

- See you later. - Okay.

"sonny, thanks for the yogurts.

Chad dylan cooper."

I didn't give you any--

Chad dylan cooper just stole my yogurt.

Oh, my gosh, chad dylan cooper just stole my yogurt!

But, gilroy, if you really wanna know,

The truth is...

Chad is in a very exclusive relationship

With somebody very special to him.

Oh my gosh, what happened to you? Are you okay?

Not really. I'm--

Yo, baby!

Okay, so enough of this.

Let's get back to celebrating me, all right?

Whoa. Hey, guys, I hired you. Whoa.

C-h-a-d!

i>- -

Okay.

At least there's still one chad standing. Huh? Right?

Tawni, you wanna weigh in on this one?

There's gonna be a weigh-in?

If I had known that, I wouldn't have eaten all the cookie dough.

Gilroy, you heard the pact that tawni and I made.

We're not gonna dish out each other. We're dish-free boring people.

Just here. Anywhere else I'm fabulous.

And she's-- she's--

Well, we made a pact so I can't say.

Well, since you two are so on the same page,

Looks like I'll need a third opinion.

Please give it up for chad dylan cooper!

What's up, y'all?

Hey!

- What are you doing here? - I'm here promoting my book.

You wrote a book?

No no, I read a book.

What are you two whispering about?

One of your "secret dates"?

I'm just here to talk about my book.

Actually you're not. I wanted you both here

So I could get your reaction to this.

Let's roll the clip.

Do they, sonny?

Do they really?

Look, it was sweet of you to put that picnic together.

It was way sweet.

But the bad blood between our two shows

Has run too deep for too long to be healed by a bowl of egg salad

And even the best of intentions.

Just because you wish for something

Doesn't make it so.

- Oh, chad dylan-- - shh.

- Whoa! - Where did you get that?

Didn't know you were being filmed, huh?

Apparently, someone at "mackenzie falls"

Doesn't like sonny very much.

So as we say on the show,

Gotcha!

But you got nothing, all right?

That was totally taken out of context.

That's what I do. If I were to wait for things to be in context,

I would not have a show.

Still, it seems the two of you

Have a little something something going on. Care to comment?

Yep, right after this commercial break.

- We're not taking a break. - Well, we are. Let's go.

You're leaving me here by myself?

- Yes. - Yes!

So I don't just do comedy.

I also have other talents. You wanna see?

Do I have a choice?

Rubber pencil!

That never gets old.

I can't believe gilroy tried to do that to us.

He's a jerk. I can't believe I read that book for nothing.

You know, tawni and I made a pact earlier

That we wouldn't tell anyone's secrets.

I think that we should probably do the same thing.

Okay, fine. I didn't read the book.

No, you were talking about between us.

Gotcha. Yeah, we don't have secrets.

- Do we? - I don't know.

Do we?

And then when I was six,

I learned this move.

I didn't win little miss flexible for nothing.

Well, let's see how flexible you really are...

Okay. -...'cause we are gonna stop talking about you

And check in with sonny and chad

On our hidden backstage "gotcha" cam.

But they're having a private conversation.

I know. Isn't it awesome?

Come on, admit it. You've been wanting to get this girl

Since the day she got to "so random!"

Honestly, what has she ever done for you?

Why don't you go talk to him?

No no no, I couldn't do that.

Sure you can. You're tawni hart, remember?

Okay okay, here I go.

I'm back.

I have no idea how to talk to a normal guy.

Just be yourself.

You're right. Here I go.

I'm back. I can't do it.

I know tonight didn't go the way we thought it would,

But I just wanted to say that--

That you're proud of me?

--That you should stick to dating movie stars,

Hotel heirs and princes.

So you must be thrilled how "gotcha"

Is gonna get sonny now.

Yeah.

Yeah, I couldn't be more thrilled, gilroy.

I mean, wait a second. Like us liking each other?

Yeah, I mean, I don't really want to talk about my feelings

- In front of a live studio audience. - Right.

Especially feelings we've never talked about before.

- Yeah. You have feelings? - Do you have feelings?

I mean, since you're really asking,

And it's just the two of us.

Right, and there's no cameras this time or anything.

- I really-- - no, listen,

It's what I'm here for.

- You go first. - No, you go first.

- Okay, same time. - Yeah.

One...

Two...

I was gonna say that, yeah.

- Chad: Two and a half. - We could do that.

- Hey! - You're right, gilroy.

What has sonny done for me except steal my spotlight?

- Give me back my remote. - No, it's mine.

No no no, it's time for tawni talk. Have a seat.

Your camera's over there.

Oh. Hey, america. Hey!

That was so much easier to say

- Than I thought it would be. - Ah! What was easy?

What did they say?

- I almost had them. - Gotcha!

Hey, look, rubber pencil.

When we go out there, we've got-- I have the hiccups.

Pfft!

When we go out there, we've got each other's backs--

Right. -

What was so easy? What did they say? - Wait wait!

Where is the pencil? It's my gag.

- I need it. - Oh, I'm sorry.

Chocopoo, which is a combination

Of messing up my line again.

- - yay!

We should make a pact.

When we go out there, we've got each other's backs.

Right. -

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