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>> Jon: [ Distorted ] WHAT
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HAPPENS WHEN YOU TAKE A FAMILY
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FROM THE WITNESS PROTECTION
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PROGRAM...
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>> Susan: MOVE THEM TO
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NEW YORK CITY...
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>> David: AND GIVE THEM THEIR
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OWN REALITY SHOW?
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>> * DA-DA-DA-DA, DO-DO
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>> Jon: PREVIOUSLY ON
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"DELOCATED"...
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WHY ELSE WOULD I PUT MY FAMILY
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ON CAMERA TO RISK THEM BEING
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MURDERED IF I WASN'T IN A SWEET
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LOFT?
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>> YOU SHOULD DO A REALITY SHOW
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ABOUT ME.
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I AM A COMEDIAN.
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HELLO, EVERYONE, AND WELCOME TO
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"YVGENY!"
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AND NOW I GET READY FOR
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"SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" AUDITION.
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[ APPLAUSE ]
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[ GLASS CLINKS ]
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>> Jon: "NIGHT MOVES,"
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BOB SEGER.
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>> MM.
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>> Jon: PRETTY GOOD, RIGHT?
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>> YEAH, THAT WAS PRETTY GOOD.
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LISTEN, JON, THE REASON I CALLED
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YOU IN HERE TODAY WAS TO TALK
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ABOUT A FEW THINGS ABOUT THE
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SHOW.
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>> Jon: MM.
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>> "DELOCATED!" WAS PITCHED AS
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[CLICKS TONGUE] A RATINGS STUNT
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FOR SWEEPS WEEK.
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WE NEVER THOUGHT IT WOULD GO
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THIS FAR.
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MAYBE A COUPLE OF WEEKS AT THE
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MOST, AND THEN WE THOUGHT YOU'D
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BE MURDERED.
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>> Jon: [ SCOFFS ]
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>> I'M PSYCHED THAT YOU'RE STILL
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ALIVE, BUT WE WERE NEVER
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BUDGETED TO GO THIS LONG.
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ANY-HOOZIES, I'M GONNA HAVE TO
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REVOKE YOUR NETWORK CREDIT CARD.
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>> Jon: UNBELIEVABLE!
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>> AND I'M GONNA NEED THE KEYS
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TO YOUR JAGUAR.
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>> Jon: I DON'T HAVE A JAGUAR.
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WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
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>> THEY DIDN'T GIVE YOU A
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JAGUAR?
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>> Jon: NO.
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>> THAT'S [BLEEP]
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YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO GET A
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JAGUAR.
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>> WHAT IS THIS?
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>> David: 2X+6.
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>> Jon: [ Sighing ] OH, BOY.
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[ SIGHS ] OH, BOY.
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[ SIGHS ]
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[ SIGHING ]
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[ EXHALES SHARPLY ]
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[ SIGHS ]
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OH, GOD.
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>> IS, UH...
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IS EVERYTHING OKAY OVER THERE?
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>> Jon: YEAH.
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JUST SOAKING IT ALL IN -- EVERY
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LAST DROP OF THIS PLACE.
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>> OKAY, JON.
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DO YOU WANT TO TELL US WHAT'S
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GOING ON?
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>> Jon: THE NETWORK HAS MADE
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SOME PRETTY SERIOUS BUDGET CUTS
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TO ALL THEIR SHOWS, INCLUDING
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MINE, AND, UH...STARTING IN A
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MONTH, THEY WILL NOT BE PAYING
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MY RENT ANYMORE.
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>> OH, MY GOD.
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>> David: WOW.
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SO WHAT ABOUT ME AND MOM?
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>> Jon: I DON'T KNOW.
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YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO ASK MOM.
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>> David: [ SIGHS ]
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>> Jon: IN ANY CASE, WE'RE GONNA
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HAVE TO REALLY TIGHTEN OUR BELTS
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AROUND HERE.
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YOU KNOW, MY PARENTS HAD A B&B
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WHEN I WAS A KID, AND IF THEY
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CAN MAKE IT WORK, THEN SO CAN
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WE, RIGHT?
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>> JON, I HAD NO IDEA YOUR
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PARENTS HAD A B&B.
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>> Jon: YEAH.
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I WORKED THERE TILL I WAS 10.
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WORKED MY ASS OFF.
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>> OKAY, NOBODY'S SAYING YOU
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DIDN'T SO...
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LISTEN, HOW ABOUT THIS?
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WHY DON'T WE COME UP WITH WAYS
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TO BUDGET?
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>> Jon: THAT IS A GOOD IDEA.
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BOOM.
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THAT IS WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO.
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OKAY, GUYS.
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I THINK WE ARE DOING A VERY GOOD
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JOB WITH THIS BUDGET, BUT WE
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NEED TO DO A FEW MORE THINGS.
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ONE OF WHICH, ROB, NO MORE
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NUMBER TWOS FOR YOU IN THE
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APARTMENT.
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>> EXCUSE ME?
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WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO GO TO THE
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BATHROOM?
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>> Jon: NOT UP FOR DISCUSSION AT
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ALL.
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FIGURE IT OUT.
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GO TO THE DELI OR SOMETHING.
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ALL RIGHT, WHAT ELSE CAN WE DO?
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>> HOW ABOUT WE GET RID OF THE
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CABLE?
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WE, LIKE, HARDLY EVER WATCH TV.
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>> Jon: ABSOLUTELY NOT.
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THAT'S WHERE I GET MY HOOPS AND
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MY HOCKS.
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>> David: WHAT'S "HOCKS"?
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>> Jon: HOCKS -- HOCKEY.
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I WISH I COULD SAVE MONEY ON
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ABBREVIATIONS.
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I'D SAVE A TUSH-LOAD OF CASH
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WITH SOME WELL-PLACED "BREEVS."
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THEY'RE GONNA STOP PAYING RENT
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IN TWO WEEKS, AND I GUESS NOW WE
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GOT TO FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU AND
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DAVID ARE GONNA DO.
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>> Susan: WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
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>> Jon: I MEAN, I DON'T SEE HOW
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YOU CAN POSSIBLY AFFORD THIS
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PLACE.
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>> Susan: I DON'T PAY RENT.
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>> Jon: YOU DON'T PAY RENT HERE?
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>> NO.
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>> Jon: WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
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>> Susan: WHAT DO YOU ME-- THE
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NETWORK PAID FOR IT.
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>> Jon: EXCUSE ME?
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>> AND I GOT IT IN THE DIVORCE.
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I ALSO GOT THE JAGUAR.
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DIDN'T YOU GO OVER THIS WITH
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YOUR LAWYER?
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>> Jon: HOW -- HOW IS IT THAT
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I'M THE ONLY "BUDGE VIC" IN THIS
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WHOLE THING?
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>> Susan: WHAT'S -- WHAT IS
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"BUDGE VIC"?
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>> Jon: BUDGE VIC -- A BUDGET
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VICTIM.
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>> Susan: OH, OH, OH.
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>> Jon: NO ONE ELSE LIKES TO
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PULL A GOOD BREEV AROUND HERE?
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>> Susan: OH, HE DOES.
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HE'S REALLY GOOD AT IT,
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ACTUALLY.
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>> I DO DO THAT SOMETIMES.
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"KITCH" -- I'VE SAID "KITCH,"
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ACTUALLY.
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>> Susan: HE CALLED ME "SUZE."
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>> YEAH, SUZE. I CALL HER SUZE.
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SHE LIKES WHEN I BREEV.
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>> 'SUP, BUDDY? HOW YOU DOING?
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WHAT DID YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME
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ABOUT?
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>> I DON'T WANT TO DO JUST MY
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SHOW.
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I WANT TO DO OTHER ACTING, OTHER
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ROLES ON THE NETWORK.
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>> OKAY.
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>> WHEN I WAS KID, I DID LOTS OF
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THEATER.
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I PLAYED GREAT RUSSIAN TRAIN
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ROBBER IGOR PACHENKO.
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I AM IGOR PACHENKO, THE GREAT
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RUSSIAN TRAIN ROBBER!
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BE CALM, OR I WILL MURDER YOU!
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SEE?
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I WANT TO BE TAKEN AS SERIOUS
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ACTOR.
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>> HELL YEAH, YOU SHOULD BE
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TAKEN AS A SERIOUS ACTOR.
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AS A MATTER OF FACT, YOU KNOW
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WHAT?
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I JUST PITCHED YOU TO BE THE NEW
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LEAD IN "JEWISH GHOST."
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YEAH.
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YOU LOST. MM.
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YEAH, SECOND CHOICE.
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BUT YOU'RE IN THE GAME, DUDE,
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HUH?
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LOOK, I GOT TO ROLL.
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I'M ON TWO OTHER CALLS, BUT GOOD
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MEETING, ALL RIGHT, FELLAS?
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HEY, PETE, YOU STILL THERE?
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[BLEEP] YOU, DUDE.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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>> LET'S RESET.
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>> Jon: IT'S HARD.
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I MEAN, YOU EXPECT ME TO JUST
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GET A JOB LIKE THAT?
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IT'S IMPOSSIBLE. I CAN'T --
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>> I UNDERSTAND.
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BUT LOOK, BUDDY.
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I'M TRYING TO DO EVERYTHING I
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CAN FOR YOU.
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I MEAN, I GOT YOU THIS PART ON
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"JEWISH GHOST," AND I WAS ABLE
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TO HIRE DAVID AS MY ASSISTANT.
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>> David: HEY, JON, THEY'RE
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READY FOR YOU ON SET.
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>> Jon: TRY "DAD," ALL RIGHT?
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>> David: I'M JUST TRYING TO BE
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PROFESSIONAL.
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UH, RIGHT THIS WAY, PLEASE.
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>> Jon: YOU CAN BE PROFESSIONAL
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AND ALSO CALL ME DAD AT THE SAME
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TIME, OKAY?
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>> PICTURE'S UP.
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>> Jon: [ SIGHS ]
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>> ALL RIGHT, ROLL SOUND.
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>> SOUND SPEED.
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>> AND...ACTION.
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[ EERIE MUSIC PLAYS ]
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>> [ Echoing ] O-O-O-O-O-O-Y.
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>> Jon: [ SCREAMS ]
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>> O-O-O-O-O-O-Y!
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>> JEWISH GHOST, NO!
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>> AND CUT!
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OH, THAT WAS --
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THAT WAS AWESOME. NICE JOB.
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>> THAT FEEL GOOD?
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>> SO GOOD.
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>> David: I AM IN AWE.
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>> IT FELT REAL.
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THAT ONE FELT REAL.
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>> THAT WAS TERRIFIC.
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>> THAT WAS GOOD.
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>> THANKS, MAN. THANK YOU.
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>> THAT WAS REALLY GOOD.
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>> [ WHISPERING ]
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>> David: [ SCOFFS ] OKAY.
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HEY, MAN. SO, REALLY GREAT.
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REALLY GREAT JOB.
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UM, I THINK WE GOT IT.
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>> Jon: OH, REALLY?
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OH, I MEAN, YOU KNOW, COOL,
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TOTES.
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BUT, UH, YOU DON'T -- Y-YOU
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DON'T NEED ANY MORE TAKES?
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>> David: YEAH, NO. WE'RE GOOD.
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UM, ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW, THERE'S
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SOMETHING ELSE WE WERE TALKING
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ABOUT MAYBE YOU COULD DO.
266
00:07:31,685 --> 00:07:32,885
>> Jon: OH, YEAH.
267
00:07:32,886 --> 00:07:34,686
DO SOME WILD LINES, RIGHT?
268
00:07:34,688 --> 00:07:36,758
MAYBE ME AND THE WOLF MAN LAY IT
269
00:07:36,757 --> 00:07:37,757
DOWN.
270
00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:38,758
>> HEY, MAN!
271
00:07:38,759 --> 00:07:40,029
DON'T CALL ME THAT.
272
00:07:40,027 --> 00:07:41,357
>> David: UH, NO.
273
00:07:41,361 --> 00:07:43,261
I WAS ACTUALLY MORE THINKING,
274
00:07:43,263 --> 00:07:44,803
UM, YOU COULD, LIKE, MOP THE
275
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,668
FLOORS, LIKE, FOR REAL, AND, YOU
276
00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:50,837
KNOW, THEY'LL PAY YOU, SO...
277
00:07:50,838 --> 00:07:53,368
>> Jon: OH.
278
00:07:53,373 --> 00:07:54,843
THIS IS WORSE THAN I THOUGHT IT
279
00:07:54,842 --> 00:07:55,642
WAS GONNA BE.
280
00:07:55,643 --> 00:07:57,343
I-I GOT TO THINK OF MORE WAYS TO
281
00:07:57,344 --> 00:07:59,354
CUT BACK.
282
00:07:59,346 --> 00:08:00,806
>> WELL, MY FRIEND OFFERED TO
283
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:02,584
LET ME TEACH AT HER YOGA RETREAT
284
00:08:02,583 --> 00:08:03,923
THAT'S COMING UP.
285
00:08:03,917 --> 00:08:05,517
I MEAN, I'LL BE GONE FOR A FEW
286
00:08:05,519 --> 00:08:06,989
WEEKS, BUT IT'LL PROBABLY HELP.
287
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:08,687
>> Jon: THAT'S A LONG TIME, BUT,
288
00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:10,019
I MEAN, IN THE END, IT'LL BE
289
00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:10,723
WORTH IT.
290
00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:12,434
WE CAN GO BACK TO THAT EXPENSIVE
291
00:08:12,425 --> 00:08:14,285
BONE LUBE WE LIKE.
292
00:08:14,294 --> 00:08:15,464
MAYBE I SHOULD CANCEL MY GYM
293
00:08:15,462 --> 00:08:16,562
'SHIP.
294
00:08:16,564 --> 00:08:18,404
>> YOUR WHAT?
295
00:08:18,398 --> 00:08:19,598
>> Jon: GYM MEMBERSHIP.
296
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:20,670
GOD, YOU KNOW WHAT?
297
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:22,298
IT'S NO FUN ABBREVIATING IF NO
298
00:08:22,302 --> 00:08:24,302
ONE ELSE DOES IT.
299
00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:25,674
>> GOT TO TELL YOU, I DON'T KNOW
300
00:08:25,673 --> 00:08:26,973
WHY ANYBODY WOULD PAY FOR A GYM
301
00:08:26,974 --> 00:08:28,444
WHEN THERE'S A GREAT PLACE TO
302
00:08:28,441 --> 00:08:30,511
WORK OUT FOR ABSOLUTELY FREE, 24
303
00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:32,510
HOURS A DAY, WITH LOCATIONS ALL
304
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:33,452
OVER THE CITY.
305
00:08:33,446 --> 00:08:34,646
>> Jon: WHERE'S THAT?
306
00:08:34,648 --> 00:08:37,818
>> [ SCOFFS ]
307
00:08:37,818 --> 00:08:39,818
RIGHT HERE.
308
00:08:39,820 --> 00:08:41,350
>> Jon: RIGHT WHERE?
309
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:43,524
>> THE STREET.
310
00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:45,693
CHECK THIS OUT. LOOK AT THIS.
311
00:08:45,693 --> 00:08:47,733
EVERY CONSTRUCTION SITE PROVIDES
312
00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:49,658
YOU WITH YOUR OWN FREE CHIN-UP
313
00:08:49,663 --> 00:08:50,663
BAR.
314
00:08:50,664 --> 00:08:52,374
[ GRUNTS ]
315
00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,365
ABSOLUTELY FREE.
316
00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:55,697
[ GRUNTS ]
317
00:08:55,703 --> 00:08:57,073
LOOK AT THIS -- YOU GOT MILES OF
318
00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:57,840
JOGGING TRACK.
319
00:08:57,838 --> 00:08:59,368
WHY DON'T YOU GO RUN ACROSS THE
320
00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:00,012
BROOKLYN BRIDGE?
321
00:09:00,007 --> 00:09:01,537
YOU'LL GET A HELL OF A WORKOUT,
322
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,411
AND THEN AFTERWARDS...
323
00:09:03,410 --> 00:09:05,080
YOU CAN WARM DOWN WITH A NICE
324
00:09:05,078 --> 00:09:06,608
LITTLE STREET STRETCH.
325
00:09:06,614 --> 00:09:07,484
[ GRUNTS ]
326
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:09,120
AND HERE'S THE KICKER -- THE
327
00:09:09,116 --> 00:09:11,046
WHOLE THING COST ME ABSOLUTELY
328
00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:11,891
NOTHING.
329
00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:13,345
>> Jon: [ LAUGHS ]
330
00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:14,523
STREET STRETCH!
331
00:09:14,521 --> 00:09:16,891
I THINK YOU'RE ONTO SOMETHING.
332
00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:20,934
>> YOU KNOW, IF I WAS SECOND
333
00:09:20,928 --> 00:09:24,098
CHOICE, THAT MEANS I'D GET PART
334
00:09:24,097 --> 00:09:28,497
IF SCOTT WOLF GOT SICK.
335
00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:29,965
OR WORSE.
336
00:09:29,970 --> 00:09:31,140
>> NO.
337
00:09:31,138 --> 00:09:32,038
>> PLEASE?!
338
00:09:32,039 --> 00:09:32,739
>> NO.
339
00:09:32,740 --> 00:09:34,680
IF YOU WANT SCOTT WOLF DEAD SO
340
00:09:34,675 --> 00:09:37,005
BADLY, YOU KILL HIM YOURSELF.
341
00:09:37,010 --> 00:09:38,880
BUT YOU CANNOT DO IT.
342
00:09:38,879 --> 00:09:41,049
YOU ARE NOT KILLER, YVGENY.
343
00:09:41,048 --> 00:09:42,718
YOU WOULD HAVE TO BECOME
344
00:09:42,716 --> 00:09:44,646
COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON TO
345
00:09:44,652 --> 00:09:46,992
DO IT -- LIKE ACTING.
346
00:09:46,987 --> 00:09:49,157
DON'T THINK OF BULLETS AS REAL.
347
00:09:49,156 --> 00:09:50,786
DON'T THINK OF BLOOD, DEATH --
348
00:09:50,791 --> 00:09:51,761
NONE OF IT REAL.
349
00:09:51,759 --> 00:09:53,429
PRETEND YOU ARE CHARACTER, LIKE
350
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:54,156
ON TV.
351
00:09:54,161 --> 00:09:56,001
>> LIKE JAY LENO!
352
00:09:55,996 --> 00:09:58,166
>> YES, RIGHT.
353
00:09:58,165 --> 00:09:59,725
LIKE J-LO.
354
00:10:02,502 --> 00:10:03,602
>> Jon: YOU KNOW, WE'RE GONNA
355
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:04,643
HAVE MATCHING COSTUMES, AND
356
00:10:04,638 --> 00:10:05,708
WE'RE GONNA MAKE A VIDEO AND
357
00:10:05,706 --> 00:10:06,636
THEN SELL DVDs.
358
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,140
YOU KNOW, IT'S GONNA BE CALLED
359
00:10:08,141 --> 00:10:09,141
"STREET STRETCH."
360
00:10:09,142 --> 00:10:10,042
>> OKAY, WAIT.
361
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:11,413
SO YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU A
362
00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:12,711
TIME SLOT FOR AN INFOMERCIAL, IS
363
00:10:12,713 --> 00:10:13,083
THAT IT?
364
00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:13,710
>> PLEASE!
365
00:10:13,714 --> 00:10:14,554
>> I DON'T KNOW.
366
00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:15,617
DAVID, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
367
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:16,875
>> David: YEAH, LET ME CALL YOU
368
00:10:16,884 --> 00:10:17,754
BACK.
369
00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:20,451
UM, YEAH, I DON'T KNOW.
370
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:21,923
IT DOESN'T REALLY SOUND LIKE THE
371
00:10:21,922 --> 00:10:23,162
TYPE OF PROGRAMMING WE'RE
372
00:10:23,156 --> 00:10:24,656
FOCUSING ON RIGHT NOW.
373
00:10:27,527 --> 00:10:28,957
>> Jon: YOU DIDN'T WANT TO CALL
374
00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:30,602
ME DAD 'CAUSE YOU WANTED TO BE
375
00:10:30,597 --> 00:10:31,927
PROFESSIONAL, IS THAT RIGHT?
376
00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:32,572
>> YEAH.
377
00:10:32,565 --> 00:10:33,195
>> Jon: OKAY.
378
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:35,200
THIS IS ME BEING PROFESSIONAL.
379
00:10:35,202 --> 00:10:36,872
SHUT THE [BLEEP] UP.
380
00:10:36,870 --> 00:10:39,140
OKAY, I DON'T NEED A KID TELLING
381
00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:42,679
ME ABOUT PROGRAMMING, OKAY?!
382
00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:44,846
OKAY, NOW THIS IS ME SWITCHING
383
00:10:44,845 --> 00:10:46,845
TO BEING YOUR DAD.
384
00:10:46,847 --> 00:10:48,717
I'M SORRY I JUST YELLED AT YOU.
385
00:10:48,716 --> 00:10:50,046
I LOVE YOU.
386
00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:51,920
NOW PLEASE SHUT THE [BLEEP] UP.
387
00:10:51,919 --> 00:10:54,789
I'M TRYING TO MAKE MONEY, OKAY?
388
00:10:54,788 --> 00:10:55,188
OKAY?
389
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:56,858
ALL RIGHT, NOW I'M SWITCHING
390
00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:58,457
BACK TO BEING PROFESSIONAL.
391
00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:00,088
KEEP YOUR [BLEEP] MOUTH SHUT AND
392
00:11:00,093 --> 00:11:00,933
BUTT OUT.
393
00:11:00,928 --> 00:11:01,858
WE'RE GOOD?
394
00:11:01,862 --> 00:11:03,632
>> WELL, I CAN GIVE YOU A
395
00:11:03,630 --> 00:11:04,770
LATE-NIGHT TIME SLOT.
396
00:11:04,765 --> 00:11:05,565
>> Jon: YES!
397
00:11:05,565 --> 00:11:06,765
I MEAN, T-THAT WOULD BE
398
00:11:06,767 --> 00:11:07,797
INCREDIBLE!
399
00:11:07,835 --> 00:11:09,165
>> Both: ONE, TWO, THREE!
400
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:10,469
"STREET STRETCH"!
401
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:12,473
>> Jon: "STREET STRETCH" -- THE
402
00:11:12,472 --> 00:11:13,812
ULTIMATE FREE GYM.
403
00:11:13,807 --> 00:11:16,507
THE PERFECT PLACE TO STRETCH.
404
00:11:16,509 --> 00:11:18,509
WORK YOUR ABS.
405
00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:22,821
WORK YOUR QUADS, YOUR TRICEPS,
406
00:11:22,850 --> 00:11:24,850
DELTS.
407
00:11:24,852 --> 00:11:27,692
HIT THE WEIGHT ROOM.
408
00:11:27,721 --> 00:11:29,721
TRY THE CLIMBING WALL.
409
00:11:29,723 --> 00:11:30,963
USE ANY NUMBER OF OUR
410
00:11:30,958 --> 00:11:32,728
STATIONARY BIKES AND WORK YOUR
411
00:11:32,726 --> 00:11:34,656
BICEPS AT THE SAME TIME.
412
00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:36,661
AND WHEN YOU'RE ALL DONE, HIT
413
00:11:36,663 --> 00:11:38,633
THE STEAM ROOM.
414
00:11:38,665 --> 00:11:40,725
>> Both: "STREET STRETCH"!
415
00:11:40,734 --> 00:11:42,174
>> Jon: AND THERE YOU HAVE IT --
416
00:11:42,169 --> 00:11:43,769
A NEW CONCEPT IN EXERCISE THAT'S
417
00:11:43,771 --> 00:11:44,941
PRICED RIGHT TO BEAT THE
418
00:11:44,938 --> 00:11:46,568
RECESSION BLUES IN TODAY'S TOUGH
419
00:11:46,573 --> 00:11:47,783
ECONOMY OF HARD TIMES.
420
00:11:47,775 --> 00:11:48,275
[ CLAPS ]
421
00:11:48,275 --> 00:11:49,875
AND WITH THE STREET STRETCH
422
00:11:49,877 --> 00:11:51,237
DVD, BARGAIN-PRICED AT JUST
423
00:11:51,244 --> 00:11:52,984
$5.99, WE'RE GONNA SHOW YOU ALL
424
00:11:52,980 --> 00:11:54,510
THE WAYS YOU CAN TURN ANY
425
00:11:54,514 --> 00:11:55,854
NEIGHBORHOOD INTO YOUR OWN
426
00:11:55,849 --> 00:11:56,779
PERSONAL GYM.
427
00:11:56,784 --> 00:11:58,694
JUST GO TO streetstretchin.wow,
428
00:11:58,685 --> 00:11:59,745
OR CHECK OUR THE
429
00:11:59,753 --> 00:12:01,253
"STREET STRETCH" RV ON OUR
430
00:12:01,254 --> 00:12:02,794
UPCOMING "STREET STRETCH" TOUR.
431
00:12:02,790 --> 00:12:03,660
[ CLAPS ]
432
00:12:03,656 --> 00:12:05,526
"STREET STRETCH"!
433
00:12:05,525 --> 00:12:07,155
>> WELL, WE HAD OUR DOUBTS, BUT
434
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,060
WE'VE ACTUALLY RECEIVED A DECENT
435
00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:11,632
AMOUNT OF CALLS ABOUT THE DVD.
436
00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:12,674
>> Jon: AWESOME.
437
00:12:12,665 --> 00:12:14,295
WHEN DO I START SEEING MY MONEY?
438
00:12:14,301 --> 00:12:16,671
>> WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
439
00:12:16,669 --> 00:12:17,809
YOU MEAN MY MONEY.
440
00:12:17,805 --> 00:12:19,735
>> WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA,
441
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:20,239
WHOA, WHOA.
442
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,610
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
443
00:12:21,608 --> 00:12:22,608
>> I'M TALKING ABOUT
444
00:12:22,609 --> 00:12:23,739
"STREET STRETCH," MY IDEA.
445
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,083
I FIGURED YOU WERE JUST HELPING
446
00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:25,878
ME GET IT DONE.
447
00:12:25,879 --> 00:12:27,049
>> Jon: NO, WE NEVER HAD A
448
00:12:27,047 --> 00:12:28,717
CONVERSATION ABOUT ANY OF THAT.
449
00:12:28,715 --> 00:12:30,075
>> WELL, WE ALSO NEVER HAD A
450
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:31,723
CONVERSATION ABOUT YOU TELLING
451
00:12:31,718 --> 00:12:33,018
ME WHERE I COULD GO TO THE
452
00:12:33,020 --> 00:12:33,720
BATHROOM.
453
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:34,890
>> Jon: ROB, YOU AND I WERE
454
00:12:34,888 --> 00:12:36,058
THERE TOGETHER WHEN YOU BROUGHT
455
00:12:36,056 --> 00:12:37,186
UP "STREET STRETCH."
456
00:12:37,190 --> 00:12:38,960
I THOUGHT IT WAS GREAT, I LOVED
457
00:12:38,959 --> 00:12:40,689
IT, I PITCHED IT, I FIGURED IT
458
00:12:40,693 --> 00:12:42,203
WAS OUR IDEA WHEN I DID THAT.
459
00:12:42,195 --> 00:12:43,625
>> I TOLD YOU ABOUT MY
460
00:12:43,630 --> 00:12:45,200
"STREET STRETCH" IDEA, WHICH I
461
00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:46,628
HAVE HAD FOR 12 YEARS.
462
00:12:46,633 --> 00:12:48,103
>> Jon: YOU'VE BEEN CARRYING
463
00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:49,641
AROUND THIS IDEA IN YOUR
464
00:12:49,636 --> 00:12:51,166
TESTICLES, AND YOU STUCK IT IN
465
00:12:51,171 --> 00:12:52,971
MY IDEA VAGINA, AND THEN I TOOK
466
00:12:52,973 --> 00:12:54,843
IT, AND IT CAME OUT OF ME.
467
00:12:54,842 --> 00:12:56,342
"STREET STRETCH"!
468
00:12:56,343 --> 00:12:57,283
"STREET STRETCH"!
469
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:58,947
AND I GAVE BIRTH TO THE IDEA AND
470
00:12:58,946 --> 00:12:59,876
MADE THIS HAPPEN.
471
00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:01,210
>> YOU TOUCH THIS IDEA BABY,
472
00:13:01,214 --> 00:13:02,754
AND I'M GONNA SUE THE [BLEEP]
473
00:13:02,749 --> 00:13:03,279
OUT OF YOU.
474
00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:04,253
IT'S THAT SIMPLE.
475
00:13:04,251 --> 00:13:05,691
>> David: ALWAYS GET IT IN
476
00:13:05,685 --> 00:13:06,185
WRITING.
477
00:13:06,186 --> 00:13:07,116
>> HE'S RIGHT.
478
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,760
>> Jon: LOOK, I SPENT ALL MY
479
00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:09,755
SAVINGS ON THIS.
480
00:13:09,756 --> 00:13:10,716
I BOUGHT AN RV.
481
00:13:10,723 --> 00:13:11,723
>> YEAH, I KNOW.
482
00:13:11,724 --> 00:13:13,294
I WAS THERE WHEN YOU BOUGHT IT.
483
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:15,063
NOW, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, I GOT
484
00:13:15,062 --> 00:13:16,062
TO GO DOWN TO THE DELI.
485
00:13:16,063 --> 00:13:20,933
>> Jon: ROB.
486
00:13:20,934 --> 00:13:22,644
>> David: LOOK, JON.
487
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:24,905
I WAS GONNA SHOOT YOU AN E-MAIL
488
00:13:24,905 --> 00:13:26,765
ABOUT THIS, BUT...YOU GOT TO
489
00:13:26,773 --> 00:13:28,243
START PAYING YOUR RENT NEXT WEEK
490
00:13:28,241 --> 00:13:29,881
OR YOU'RE GETTING KICKED OUT OF
491
00:13:29,877 --> 00:13:30,737
YOUR APARTMENT.
492
00:13:30,743 --> 00:13:32,213
DAD, YOU ALREADY HAVE A PLACE TO
493
00:13:32,212 --> 00:13:33,752
STAY, AND IT'S ALL PAID FOR.
494
00:13:33,746 --> 00:13:34,946
>> Jon: THANK YOU, DAVID.
495
00:13:34,948 --> 00:13:36,618
AT LEAST THERE'S SOMEBODY AROUND
496
00:13:36,616 --> 00:13:37,986
HERE THAT UNDERSTANDS THAT I'M
497
00:13:37,985 --> 00:13:39,345
THE ONE THAT SHOULD BE LIVING
498
00:13:39,352 --> 00:13:40,322
IN THE SWEET LOFT.
499
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:44,020
>> David: I-I MEANT THE RV.
500
00:13:44,024 --> 00:13:45,194
[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ]
501
00:13:45,192 --> 00:13:46,862
>> THAT'S GOING ON FACEBOOK.
502
00:13:54,767 --> 00:13:57,667
>> Jon: [ SOBBING ]
503
00:14:04,277 --> 00:14:06,877
[ HORNS HONKING ]
504
00:14:14,054 --> 00:14:17,364
SO, THE BEDROOM IS BACK HERE.
505
00:14:17,657 --> 00:14:19,257
THAT'S THE BATHROOM.
506
00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:21,429
KITCHEN AND THE STOVE UNDER
507
00:14:21,428 --> 00:14:23,798
HERE, AND, YOU KNOW [SIGHS]
508
00:14:23,796 --> 00:14:24,826
THAT'S IT.
509
00:14:24,831 --> 00:14:25,771
THAT'S MY PLACE.
510
00:14:25,765 --> 00:14:26,995
>> HEY, JUST TRY TO STAY
511
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,440
POSITIVE, SWEETIE, ALL RIGHT?
512
00:14:28,435 --> 00:14:30,035
YOU KNOW, YOU CAN -- YOU CAN
513
00:14:30,037 --> 00:14:31,667
JUST PRETEND YOU'RE LIVING IN
514
00:14:31,671 --> 00:14:32,971
THE COUNTRY OR SOMETHING.
515
00:14:32,973 --> 00:14:34,313
>> Jon: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW.
516
00:14:34,307 --> 00:14:39,177
IT'S...IT'S HARD.
517
00:14:39,179 --> 00:14:40,949
>> THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU TOLD ME
518
00:14:40,948 --> 00:14:42,078
ABOUT YOUR PARENTS.
519
00:14:42,082 --> 00:14:43,722
THEY FOUND A WAY TO MAKE IT
520
00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:44,876
WORK.
521
00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:47,024
YOU CAN, TOO.
522
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:03,197
>> Jon: [ With accent ] SAY,
523
00:15:03,203 --> 00:15:05,373
THERE, WELCOME TO THE B&B.
524
00:15:05,372 --> 00:15:06,812
HOW ABOUT SOME CHERRY PIE,
525
00:15:06,806 --> 00:15:07,166
THERE?
526
00:15:07,174 --> 00:15:07,984
HAVE A SLICE.
527
00:15:07,975 --> 00:15:09,205
>> SOUNDS A LITTLE IRISH, I
528
00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:09,779
THINK.
529
00:15:09,776 --> 00:15:11,076
>> Jon: [ Normal voice ] NO,
530
00:15:11,078 --> 00:15:11,878
THAT'S MAINE.
531
00:15:11,878 --> 00:15:12,348
>> MAINE?
532
00:15:12,345 --> 00:15:13,805
>> Jon: [ With accent ] SOME
533
00:15:13,813 --> 00:15:15,183
CHERRY -- TASTE YOU REAL NICE,
534
00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:15,752
THERE.
535
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:16,448
SAY, THERE.
536
00:15:16,449 --> 00:15:18,149
[ Normal voice ] ANYWAY.
537
00:15:18,151 --> 00:15:20,151
[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]
538
00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:21,023
>> HI.
539
00:15:21,021 --> 00:15:22,061
>> HELLO.
540
00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:24,115
>> Jon: HELLO, WELCOME.
541
00:15:24,124 --> 00:15:25,864
YOU MUST BE THE STEINBERGS FROM
542
00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:26,958
ANN ARBOR, MICHIGAN.
543
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,160
>> Both: THAT'S RIGHT.
544
00:15:28,161 --> 00:15:29,361
>> Jon: WELCOME TO THE
545
00:15:29,362 --> 00:15:31,062
STREET STRETCH B&B.
546
00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:32,774
I'M YOUR HOST, JON.
547
00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:35,435
THIS IS ROB WITH THE BAGS.
548
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:36,795
EVERYTHING OKAY?
549
00:15:36,803 --> 00:15:38,773
>> YOUR WEBSITE DIDN'T MENTION
550
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:40,811
ANYTHING ABOUT THE B&B BEING IN
551
00:15:40,807 --> 00:15:41,407
AN RV.
552
00:15:41,408 --> 00:15:42,938
>> Jon: UH, YES.
553
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:45,882
THAT WAS INTENTIONAL BECAUSE, AS
554
00:15:45,878 --> 00:15:48,418
WE ALL KNOW, PEOPLE THAT LIKE
555
00:15:48,415 --> 00:15:50,015
B&Bs ARE ALL ABOUT THE
556
00:15:50,017 --> 00:15:51,777
"VENCH" -- THE, UH -- THE
557
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:52,894
ADVENTURE.
558
00:15:52,885 --> 00:15:55,015
>> LOOK, UM, I'M SORRY.
559
00:15:55,022 --> 00:15:56,992
THIS IS PREPOSTEROUS.
560
00:15:56,990 --> 00:15:57,990
WE'RE LEAVING.
561
00:15:57,991 --> 00:15:59,461
AND I EXPECT TO GET OUR DEPOSIT
562
00:15:59,459 --> 00:15:59,989
BACK.
563
00:15:59,993 --> 00:16:01,233
>> Jon: HOLD ON A SECOND.
564
00:16:01,228 --> 00:16:01,858
LISTEN.
565
00:16:01,861 --> 00:16:03,361
JUST WAIT A SECOND, OKAY?
566
00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:05,233
I'LL GIVE YOU YOUR FIRST NIGHT
567
00:16:05,232 --> 00:16:06,432
FREE, OKAY?
568
00:16:06,433 --> 00:16:09,243
JUST TRY IT BEFORE YOU MAKE UP
569
00:16:09,236 --> 00:16:11,766
YOUR MIND.
570
00:16:11,771 --> 00:16:14,771
>> IT REALLY IS VERY LOVELY,
571
00:16:14,774 --> 00:16:16,114
HONEY.
572
00:16:16,109 --> 00:16:18,979
>> WELL, I DO LIKE THE DETAILING
573
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,478
ON THE CURTAINS.
574
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,150
>> I THINK WE'LL TRY IT.
575
00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:23,849
>> WHAT'S YOUR NAME, PAL?
576
00:16:23,850 --> 00:16:24,380
>> SAM.
577
00:16:24,384 --> 00:16:25,924
>> SAMMY. "TO SAMMY."
578
00:16:25,918 --> 00:16:27,218
HEY, CAN YOU GUYS DO
579
00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:28,190
JEWISH GHOST?
580
00:16:28,188 --> 00:16:29,318
>> All: O-O-O-O-Y!
581
00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:30,822
>> [ Laughing ] NICE!
582
00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,833
THAT WAS PRETTY GOOD.
583
00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:33,885
HEY, MAN.
584
00:16:33,893 --> 00:16:35,233
WHO SHOULD I MAKE IT OUT TO?
585
00:16:35,228 --> 00:16:36,158
>> RUN.
586
00:16:36,163 --> 00:16:38,003
>> YOU GOT IT, RON.
587
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:41,867
>> NO, NO. NOT RON.
588
00:16:41,868 --> 00:16:43,868
RUN.
589
00:16:43,870 --> 00:16:46,010
RUN.
590
00:16:49,309 --> 00:16:51,439
>> [ PANTING ]
591
00:17:01,954 --> 00:17:02,964
>> WE WERE JUST --
592
00:17:02,955 --> 00:17:04,815
>> Jon: HEY! HEY, HEY!
593
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:05,364
>> HEY.
594
00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,028
>> Jon: WHERE'S MY B&B?
595
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,056
>> IF YOU MEAN THE RV, IT'S BEEN
596
00:17:09,062 --> 00:17:09,562
IMPOUNDED.
597
00:17:09,562 --> 00:17:11,062
YOU'VE BEEN ILLEGALLY PARKED
598
00:17:11,064 --> 00:17:11,964
HERE FOR A WEEK.
599
00:17:11,964 --> 00:17:13,174
YOU DIDN'T NOTICE ALL THE
600
00:17:13,166 --> 00:17:14,226
TICKETS ON THE FRONT?
601
00:17:14,234 --> 00:17:15,874
>> W-WE WERE RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE
602
00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:17,098
OF OUR SALMON SCRAMBLE WHEN
603
00:17:17,104 --> 00:17:18,374
THERE WAS A POUNDING ON THE
604
00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:18,911
DOOR.
605
00:17:18,905 --> 00:17:20,335
WE HAD TO PACK AND LEAVE IN FIVE
606
00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:21,340
MINUTES.
607
00:17:21,341 --> 00:17:22,881
VERY DISAPPOINTING.
608
00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:24,035
MARIAN, COME ON.
609
00:17:24,043 --> 00:17:25,413
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH.
610
00:17:25,412 --> 00:17:27,182
AND I LOVED THE CROUTONS.
611
00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:28,880
[ LAUGHS ]
612
00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:32,051
>> HERE YOU GO.
613
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:38,391
>> O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-Y.
614
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:39,931
[ HANDLE RATTLES ]
615
00:17:39,926 --> 00:17:42,596
[ CLATTER ]
616
00:17:42,595 --> 00:17:47,295
O-O-O-O-Y.
617
00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:51,300
O-O-O-O-Y?
618
00:17:51,304 --> 00:17:56,184
OY.
619
00:17:56,176 --> 00:18:00,046
>> WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!
620
00:18:00,046 --> 00:18:01,546
PLEASE DON'T KILL ME.
621
00:18:01,548 --> 00:18:04,548
>> OH, I'M NOT GOING TO KILL
622
00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:06,551
YOU.
623
00:18:06,553 --> 00:18:08,523
HE IS.
624
00:18:12,259 --> 00:18:14,429
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
625
00:18:14,427 --> 00:18:17,027
>> I AM IGOR PACHENKO, THE GREAT
626
00:18:17,029 --> 00:18:18,669
RUSSIAN TRAIN ROBBER!
627
00:18:18,665 --> 00:18:21,195
STOP THIS TRAIN AT ONCE!
628
00:18:21,201 --> 00:18:23,071
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT,
629
00:18:23,069 --> 00:18:24,939
WAIT.
630
00:18:24,937 --> 00:18:27,207
DID MIGHTY JOE JON PUT YOU UP TO
631
00:18:27,207 --> 00:18:27,907
THIS?
632
00:18:27,907 --> 00:18:28,907
IS THIS A JOKE?
633
00:18:28,908 --> 00:18:31,638
I NEVER JOKE ABOUT ROBBING
634
00:18:31,644 --> 00:18:32,954
TRAINS.
635
00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:34,575
>> FINISH HIM, IGOR PACHENKO!
636
00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:39,019
[ BOTH GRUNTING ]
637
00:18:39,018 --> 00:18:42,218
>> [ LAUGHS ]
638
00:18:52,465 --> 00:18:54,465
>> [ SIGHS ]
639
00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:55,997
AND SCENE.
640
00:18:56,002 --> 00:18:57,442
>> David: YEAH, LET ME CALL YOU
641
00:18:57,437 --> 00:18:58,207
RIGHT BACK.
642
00:18:58,205 --> 00:19:00,535
I'M ABOUT TO GO INTO MY 2:00.
643
00:19:00,540 --> 00:19:02,140
[ SIGHS ]
644
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:05,711
JON. JON, WAKE UP.
645
00:19:05,712 --> 00:19:06,252
DAD.
646
00:19:06,246 --> 00:19:07,676
>> Jon: [ Slurring ] W-WHAT'S
647
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:08,250
THAT?
648
00:19:08,248 --> 00:19:10,018
WE GOT CARAMELIZED ONIONS IN THE
649
00:19:10,016 --> 00:19:10,446
FRIDGE.
650
00:19:10,450 --> 00:19:13,990
>> David: WHOA, DAD.
651
00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:15,656
I'M HOMELESS, DAVID.
652
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:17,255
YOUR DAD IS HOMELESS.
653
00:19:17,257 --> 00:19:19,127
>> David: MY DAD IS WASTED.
654
00:19:19,125 --> 00:19:21,155
>> Jon: WHAT, I CAN STILL DO A
655
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:22,560
"JEWISH GHOST" CAMEO.
656
00:19:22,562 --> 00:19:24,262
O-O-O-O-O-O-Y VEY!
657
00:19:24,264 --> 00:19:25,574
>> David: DAD, I GOT
658
00:19:25,565 --> 00:19:27,465
SUNRISE ADVENTURE RVs TO LOOK
659
00:19:27,467 --> 00:19:29,037
INTO YOUR RV B&B IDEA.
660
00:19:29,035 --> 00:19:30,065
>> Jon: OH, YEAH?
661
00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:31,599
HOW MUCH MONEY ARE THEY GONNA
662
00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:33,314
PAY ME FOR -- THAT'S A PRETTY
663
00:19:33,306 --> 00:19:34,036
BIG IDEA.
664
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:35,580
>> David: IT'S A VERY GENEROUS
665
00:19:35,575 --> 00:19:36,205
OFFER.
666
00:19:36,209 --> 00:19:37,409
YOU'LL BE VERY HAPPY.
667
00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:38,750
CONGRATULATIONS, DAD.
668
00:19:38,745 --> 00:19:40,345
YOU MADE A PLAN, AND IT WORKED.
669
00:19:40,347 --> 00:19:41,347
>> Jon: [ SOBBING ]
670
00:19:41,348 --> 00:19:42,518
>> David: DAD, COME ON.
671
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:43,415
>> COME ON, JON.
672
00:19:43,416 --> 00:19:44,616
>> David: DAD, IT'S OKAY.
673
00:19:44,617 --> 00:19:45,587
>> IT'S ALL RIGHT.
674
00:19:45,585 --> 00:19:47,185
>> Jon: [ Crying ] CAN I PLEASE
675
00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:48,616
TAKE A SHOWER AT MY SWEET LOFT?
676
00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:49,561
[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]
677
00:19:49,556 --> 00:19:50,686
>> KNOCK, KNOCK, BITCH!
678
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,120
DID YOU TELL YOUR DAD THAT
679
00:19:52,124 --> 00:19:53,164
"DELOCATED!" GOT THE
680
00:19:53,159 --> 00:19:54,289
"JEWISH GHOST" BUDGET?
681
00:19:54,294 --> 00:19:55,704
>> David: NO, I MADE UP A STORY
682
00:19:55,695 --> 00:19:57,255
ABOUT AN RV COMPANY BUYING HIM
683
00:19:57,264 --> 00:19:57,604
OUT.
684
00:19:57,597 --> 00:19:59,267
I WANTED HIM TO THINK THAT HE
685
00:19:59,266 --> 00:20:01,026
CAME UP WITH THE SOLUTION TO HIS
686
00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:02,473
PROBLEMS -- YOU KNOW, MAKE THE
687
00:20:02,469 --> 00:20:03,669
STAR OF THE SHOW HAPPY.
688
00:20:03,670 --> 00:20:04,570
>> IMPRESSIVE.
689
00:20:04,571 --> 00:20:06,171
MAYBE SOMEDAY I'LL GIVE YOU A
690
00:20:06,172 --> 00:20:06,572
RAISE.
691
00:20:06,573 --> 00:20:08,343
>> David: OR MAYBE SOMEDAY I'LL
692
00:20:08,341 --> 00:20:09,241
TAKE YOUR JOB.
693
00:20:09,242 --> 00:20:10,212
[ CHUCKLES ]
694
00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:14,184
>> OR MAYBE SOMEDAY YOU'LL BE
695
00:20:14,180 --> 00:20:15,180
FIRED.
696
00:20:15,181 --> 00:20:17,621
>> SOMEDAY AS IN TODAY?
697
00:20:17,617 --> 00:20:20,487
>> YEP. RIGHT NOW.
698
00:20:20,487 --> 00:20:22,257
BYE-BYE, BITCH!
699
00:20:22,255 --> 00:20:24,115
>> I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE PROUD
700
00:20:24,123 --> 00:20:25,693
OF MY BROTHER.
701
00:20:25,692 --> 00:20:27,692
TODAY, HE HAS TRULY BECOME REAL
702
00:20:27,694 --> 00:20:29,234
MIRMINSKY.
703
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:31,558
>> YOU MEAN REAL PACHENKO!
704
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:35,104
[ LAUGHTER ]
705
00:20:35,101 --> 00:20:37,101
I DIDN'T KNOW HALLOWEEN CAME
706
00:20:37,103 --> 00:20:38,343
EARLY THIS YEAR!
707
00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:40,638
[ LAUGHTER ]
708
00:20:48,548 --> 00:20:50,418
[ LAUGHS ]
709
00:20:50,417 --> 00:20:54,147
[ SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ]
710
00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:59,389
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
711
00:21:03,663 --> 00:21:06,673
[ LAUGHS ]
712
00:21:06,666 --> 00:21:09,366
>> MY NAME IS IGOR PACHENKO, THE
713
00:21:09,369 --> 00:21:12,539
GREAT RUSSIAN TRAIN ROBBER!
714
00:21:12,539 --> 00:21:15,409
STOP THIS TRAIN AT ONCE!
715
00:21:15,408 --> 00:21:17,838
>> OKAY, JESSE JAMES!
716
00:21:17,844 --> 00:21:21,814
[ LAUGHTER ]
717
00:21:30,189 --> 00:21:34,189
[ GRUNTING ]
718
00:21:34,193 --> 00:21:39,373
[ SCREAMING ]
719
00:21:39,366 --> 00:21:42,666
>> [ LAUGHING ]
720
00:21:48,841 --> 00:21:51,811
AH! BRAVO!
721
00:21:52,111 --> 00:21:53,181
[ MUSIC STOPS ]
722
00:21:53,179 --> 00:21:55,109
THREE CHEERS FOR IGOR PACHENKO,
723
00:21:55,114 --> 00:21:57,784
THE GREAT RUSSIAN TRAIN ROBBER!
724
00:21:57,784 --> 00:22:00,654
HIP, HIP! HOORAY!
725
00:22:00,653 --> 00:22:03,523
HIP, HIP! HOORAY!
726
00:22:03,523 --> 00:22:06,393
HIP, HIP! HOORAY!
727
00:22:06,393 --> 00:22:09,903
[ LAUGHS ]
728
00:22:09,896 --> 00:22:11,856
>> AND SCENE.
44582
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