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♪ Born on the wrong end
Of the leash ♪
2
00:00:01,959 --> 00:00:04,289
-♪ He was a dreamer ♪
-♪ And a little schemer ♪
3
00:00:04,375 --> 00:00:05,665
♪ A nutty mutt living a dog's life ♪
4
00:00:05,750 --> 00:00:07,420
♪ But when he'd hear the bell for school ♪
5
00:00:07,500 --> 00:00:08,420
♪ He'd start to drool ♪
6
00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:10,130
-♪ One day he says ♪
-♪ I'll take a chance ♪
7
00:00:10,208 --> 00:00:11,748
♪ Trades his leash
For a pair of pants ♪
8
00:00:11,834 --> 00:00:14,174
♪ In a glance, school becomes
His favorite pastime ♪
9
00:00:14,250 --> 00:00:16,580
♪ I have buried a bone
for the last time ♪
10
00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:17,997
-♪ He says ♪
-♪ I want to be a boy ♪
11
00:00:18,083 --> 00:00:19,833
♪ Ooh, he's bad ♪
12
00:00:19,917 --> 00:00:21,207
♪ He's so over just being rover ♪
13
00:00:21,291 --> 00:00:22,581
♪ I gotta be a boy ♪
14
00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:25,207
♪ He says he's just gonna be a boy ♪
15
00:00:25,291 --> 00:00:26,671
♪ Turns out he's a regular Einstein ♪
16
00:00:26,750 --> 00:00:28,710
♪ And Leonard is treading a fine line ♪
17
00:00:28,792 --> 00:00:30,962
Why can't I be a normal kid
like any other?
18
00:00:31,041 --> 00:00:33,041
Now, doodle bug,
listen to mother.
19
00:00:33,125 --> 00:00:34,915
♪ I want to be a boy ♪
20
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,750
I hate dogs.
21
00:00:36,834 --> 00:00:39,714
♪ I gotta be a boy ♪
22
00:00:39,792 --> 00:00:41,462
♪ This power pup's gonna be a boy ♪
23
00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:43,462
I do not wish to be a dog.
24
00:00:43,542 --> 00:00:46,082
♪ Now this bowser's ready for trousers ♪
25
00:00:46,166 --> 00:00:47,496
♪ I got to be a boy ♪
26
00:00:47,583 --> 00:00:49,083
♪ His nose is wet but you can bet ♪
27
00:00:49,166 --> 00:00:52,206
♪ This teacher's pet is gonna be a boy ♪
28
00:00:52,291 --> 00:00:53,541
Yes!
29
00:01:09,625 --> 00:01:10,745
Okey-dokey, dominokey.
30
00:01:10,834 --> 00:01:12,834
We've got your protein for brain food,
31
00:01:12,917 --> 00:01:15,747
your complex carbs
to keep Mr. Blood Sugar up,
32
00:01:15,834 --> 00:01:18,254
and a squidge of syrup
33
00:01:18,333 --> 00:01:19,673
just 'cause you're so sweet.
34
00:01:20,834 --> 00:01:22,134
I cannot eat all this, mom.
35
00:01:22,208 --> 00:01:23,578
Do your best.
36
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:25,167
Big exam today--
37
00:01:25,250 --> 00:01:28,080
the National Aptitude
Scholastic Test Yearly,
38
00:01:28,166 --> 00:01:29,876
or N.A.S.T.Y. for short,
39
00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:32,289
but it won't be if you're prepared.
40
00:01:32,375 --> 00:01:33,915
Ha ha ha.
41
00:01:35,250 --> 00:01:38,630
This is perfect.
The biggest test of my academic career,
42
00:01:38,709 --> 00:01:40,579
and what's supposed to fortify me?
43
00:01:40,667 --> 00:01:43,537
"Poultry byproducts, corn gluten meal,
44
00:01:43,625 --> 00:01:48,535
ferrosulfate hydrochloride,
and manganese oxide"?
45
00:01:48,625 --> 00:01:50,205
I got to get me some real food.
46
00:01:50,291 --> 00:01:51,791
Psst!
Leonard!
47
00:01:54,625 --> 00:01:55,915
Go for it.
48
00:01:59,083 --> 00:02:00,923
Mmm-mmm, protein at last.
49
00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:02,080
Ahh.
50
00:02:02,166 --> 00:02:05,576
Now I feel the old synapses
starting to fire.
51
00:02:05,667 --> 00:02:07,247
Spot, get down!
52
00:02:07,333 --> 00:02:09,333
Leonard, don't let him eat off your dish!
53
00:02:09,375 --> 00:02:10,875
[both] Darn.
54
00:02:15,834 --> 00:02:17,134
[moans]
55
00:02:17,208 --> 00:02:19,998
My mom made me eat three bowls of oatmeal
56
00:02:20,083 --> 00:02:21,503
and last night's ham.
57
00:02:21,583 --> 00:02:23,713
I had to finish a protein shake
58
00:02:23,792 --> 00:02:25,252
and two granola bars.
59
00:02:25,333 --> 00:02:27,793
I polished off a tasty fish head,
60
00:02:27,875 --> 00:02:29,455
eyes and all.
61
00:02:32,083 --> 00:02:36,133
Mmm. Even better the second time.
62
00:02:36,208 --> 00:02:37,998
[all groan]
63
00:02:38,083 --> 00:02:40,003
♪ With every turn
Of the grinding blade ♪
64
00:02:40,083 --> 00:02:41,673
♪ My pencil grows sharper
And so does my brain ♪
65
00:02:41,750 --> 00:02:43,130
♪ With every turn
Of the grinding blade ♪
66
00:02:43,208 --> 00:02:45,128
♪ My pencil grows sharper
And so does my brain ♪
67
00:02:45,208 --> 00:02:46,708
Excuse me.
68
00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:48,922
The rest of us have pencils, too.
69
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,250
Ha ha. Sorry.
70
00:02:50,333 --> 00:02:52,713
All righty, mighty test-takers,
71
00:02:52,792 --> 00:02:55,712
don't turn your booklets over
till I say go. Go!
72
00:02:55,792 --> 00:02:58,082
That always cracks me up.
73
00:03:00,333 --> 00:03:03,173
[thinking]" B"-- the answer is "B".
74
00:03:03,250 --> 00:03:05,080
Just find the little "B" bubble
75
00:03:05,166 --> 00:03:06,416
and fill it in.
76
00:03:06,500 --> 00:03:08,460
Is that dark enough?
77
00:03:08,542 --> 00:03:11,042
No, no, it should be darker.
There, that's dark enough.
78
00:03:11,125 --> 00:03:13,375
Darn! I made a hole in the paper.
79
00:03:13,458 --> 00:03:15,038
♪ The answer to that is "B" ♪
80
00:03:15,125 --> 00:03:16,875
♪ The answer to that is "C" ♪
81
00:03:16,959 --> 00:03:18,289
♪ Yuh-duh-duh-duh
Da-da-da-da ♪
82
00:03:18,375 --> 00:03:19,955
♪ Hey, none of the above, whoa ♪
83
00:03:20,041 --> 00:03:20,921
Shush!
84
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:23,500
Sorry, sister. My bad.
85
00:03:24,583 --> 00:03:25,583
[bell rings]
86
00:03:25,667 --> 00:03:27,577
Boys and girls, I have the results
87
00:03:27,667 --> 00:03:30,077
of the N.A.S.T.Y. test you took last week,
88
00:03:30,166 --> 00:03:31,576
and there's great news.
89
00:03:31,667 --> 00:03:33,667
One of our students
has achieved the highest score
90
00:03:33,750 --> 00:03:35,710
in the history of the fourth grade
91
00:03:35,792 --> 00:03:37,002
at this school.
92
00:03:37,083 --> 00:03:38,173
Was it me?
93
00:03:38,250 --> 00:03:42,130
Yeah, right.
It was Scott Leadready II.
94
00:03:42,208 --> 00:03:46,788
Me? Ha ha ha. I had no idea.
95
00:03:46,875 --> 00:03:48,825
I don't have anything prepared.
96
00:03:48,917 --> 00:03:50,577
[hisses]
97
00:03:50,667 --> 00:03:52,377
Oh, what is it, Tallulah?
98
00:03:52,458 --> 00:03:54,828
Why are you acting so strangely?
99
00:03:54,917 --> 00:03:57,167
Is it because perhaps you know
100
00:03:57,250 --> 00:04:00,670
that Scott Leadready is no
ordinary fourth-grade boy?
101
00:04:00,750 --> 00:04:02,080
What? Yes, I am.
102
00:04:02,166 --> 00:04:03,286
No, you're not!
103
00:04:03,375 --> 00:04:05,455
With a N.A.S.T.Y. Test score like this,
104
00:04:05,542 --> 00:04:08,462
you've just been promoted
to the fifth grade.
105
00:04:08,542 --> 00:04:11,172
[cheering]
106
00:04:12,792 --> 00:04:15,132
Ah, the fifth grade.
107
00:04:15,208 --> 00:04:18,288
It seems like just yesterday
I was in the fourth grade.
108
00:04:18,375 --> 00:04:19,955
It was just yesterday.
109
00:04:20,041 --> 00:04:21,541
My, how time flies.
110
00:04:21,625 --> 00:04:23,745
Just think, at the rate I'm going,
111
00:04:23,834 --> 00:04:26,294
this time next year I could be in college.
112
00:04:26,375 --> 00:04:27,245
Isn't it enough
113
00:04:27,333 --> 00:04:29,043
that you're going to
be a grade ahead of me?
114
00:04:29,125 --> 00:04:32,075
Perhaps for some, but now
that I've had a taste of life
115
00:04:32,166 --> 00:04:33,706
in the fast lane,
116
00:04:33,792 --> 00:04:37,042
I don't know that I can
ever drive the speed limit.
117
00:04:37,125 --> 00:04:39,205
Here comes Scott.
118
00:04:39,291 --> 00:04:42,041
-Ooh, he's a special boy!
-Man, he's so cool!
119
00:04:42,125 --> 00:04:44,035
Hey, Scott, remember us?
120
00:04:44,125 --> 00:04:46,165
Why, no, I don't believe I--
121
00:04:46,250 --> 00:04:48,710
of course I do!
122
00:04:48,792 --> 00:04:49,882
[laughing]
123
00:04:49,959 --> 00:04:53,129
-He's so funny.
-Ooh, he's dreamy.
124
00:04:53,208 --> 00:04:54,628
Oh, man.
125
00:04:54,709 --> 00:04:56,419
Of all the dogs
they could have promoted...
126
00:04:57,667 --> 00:05:00,377
Well, Leonard,
it's been a slice of cheese,
127
00:05:00,458 --> 00:05:02,498
but the fifth grade awaits.
128
00:05:02,583 --> 00:05:05,713
Farewell. Parting is such sweet sorrow.
129
00:05:05,792 --> 00:05:09,502
Bill Shakespeare--
big fifth grade writer.
130
00:05:11,667 --> 00:05:13,457
Hey! Aren't you the new fifth grader?
131
00:05:13,542 --> 00:05:16,002
Yes, sir, sir. That I am, sir.
132
00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:18,213
What are you doing out here lollygagging?
133
00:05:18,291 --> 00:05:19,961
We got work to do, mister!
134
00:05:23,458 --> 00:05:27,538
Wow, it is bigger in fifth grade.
135
00:05:29,125 --> 00:05:31,125
Hey, is that stubble on your chin?
136
00:05:31,208 --> 00:05:34,208
No, dufus, it's ink from my pen.
137
00:05:34,291 --> 00:05:36,461
Wow, they use ink in fifth grade.
138
00:05:36,542 --> 00:05:38,712
Everything is happening so fast.
139
00:05:42,125 --> 00:05:44,955
Okay, everyone got that down?
140
00:05:45,041 --> 00:05:46,751
Uh, wait a sec.
141
00:05:46,834 --> 00:05:49,294
Do we have a problem, Mr. Leadready?
142
00:05:49,375 --> 00:05:50,955
Who, sir? Me, sir? No, sir.
143
00:05:51,041 --> 00:05:53,211
Hey, ever been to Big Sur, sir?
144
00:05:53,291 --> 00:05:54,711
Zip it.
145
00:05:54,792 --> 00:05:57,042
Yes, sir.
Oh, kind of surly, sir.
146
00:05:57,125 --> 00:05:59,785
Well, I said I wanted a challenge.
147
00:06:04,250 --> 00:06:07,290
Okay, finished my 15 minutes
of silent reading.
148
00:06:07,375 --> 00:06:10,915
Homework's done. Time to play.
149
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:13,330
Come on, Spot, let's go
throw a ball around.
150
00:06:13,417 --> 00:06:14,747
I can't.
151
00:06:14,834 --> 00:06:17,334
I've got 43 more
pre-algebra problems,
152
00:06:17,417 --> 00:06:19,327
100 vocabulary words to look up,
153
00:06:19,417 --> 00:06:22,327
and I'm supposed to outline
the next eight chapters
154
00:06:22,417 --> 00:06:24,627
of "Health For Kids, Grade Five."
155
00:06:24,709 --> 00:06:27,079
Ah, it's nice to just be a pet,
156
00:06:27,166 --> 00:06:28,916
isn't it, Mr. Jolly?
157
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:30,670
Oh, indubitably, Pretty Boy.
158
00:06:30,750 --> 00:06:32,130
No stress, no worries.
159
00:06:32,208 --> 00:06:33,748
Someone else takes care
160
00:06:33,834 --> 00:06:35,754
of your every whim, your every need.
161
00:06:35,834 --> 00:06:37,214
Ha ha ha.
162
00:06:37,291 --> 00:06:39,631
All you got to do is play dumb,
163
00:06:39,709 --> 00:06:42,249
but you, you're too dumb to play dumb.
164
00:06:42,333 --> 00:06:44,963
Ha ha ha!
165
00:06:45,041 --> 00:06:47,541
Hey, Pretty Boy, Mr. Jolly, want to play?
166
00:06:47,625 --> 00:06:50,375
When you love your work, it's not work.
167
00:06:50,458 --> 00:06:51,958
It is play.
168
00:06:52,041 --> 00:06:57,001
[Mr. Jolly] You're it. Ha ha ha!
169
00:06:57,083 --> 00:06:58,753
Oop, you missed me.
170
00:06:58,834 --> 00:07:00,254
Ha ha ha!
171
00:07:00,333 --> 00:07:04,083
Whoo-hoo! Whoa! Ha ha ha.
172
00:07:06,959 --> 00:07:09,129
Hurry up. We're going
to be late for school.
173
00:07:09,208 --> 00:07:13,418
Uh, sorry, but some of us
have a little more
174
00:07:13,500 --> 00:07:15,420
in their backpack than just lunch--
175
00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:17,580
Shakespeare, pre-algebra...ugh!
176
00:07:17,667 --> 00:07:19,877
Yeah, yeah, just come on.
177
00:07:19,959 --> 00:07:21,459
I don't want to be tardy.
178
00:07:21,542 --> 00:07:24,132
We're having a storyteller
come to class today.
179
00:07:24,208 --> 00:07:26,828
A storyteller? Oh.
180
00:07:26,917 --> 00:07:29,207
I remember storytellers.
181
00:07:29,291 --> 00:07:33,211
They talk, and all
you got to do is listen.
182
00:07:33,291 --> 00:07:36,831
Not nearly as rewarding as Shakespeare,
183
00:07:36,917 --> 00:07:39,287
but fun in a fourth grade kind of way.
184
00:07:39,375 --> 00:07:41,035
Hey, Leadready, what are you doing
185
00:07:41,125 --> 00:07:42,705
hanging around that kindergartner?
186
00:07:42,792 --> 00:07:45,582
I'm not a kindergartner.
I'm a fourth grader.
187
00:07:45,667 --> 00:07:47,037
Tell them.
188
00:07:47,125 --> 00:07:49,745
Uh, yeah, right.
I'll go set them straight.
189
00:07:49,834 --> 00:07:52,384
Uh, look, fellas,
190
00:07:52,458 --> 00:07:54,378
I helped him cross the street
191
00:07:54,458 --> 00:07:57,378
and then I didn't have
the heart to ditch him.
192
00:07:57,458 --> 00:08:00,128
He wanted to hang with a fifth grader.
193
00:08:00,208 --> 00:08:02,788
What are you going to do, right, homeys?
194
00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:07,880
[bell rings]
195
00:08:07,959 --> 00:08:12,249
[cheering]
196
00:08:12,333 --> 00:08:15,133
Hi, Scott.
197
00:08:15,208 --> 00:08:16,668
Uh, yo, Scott,
198
00:08:16,750 --> 00:08:18,290
uh, there's your little buddy again.
199
00:08:18,375 --> 00:08:19,915
Um, oh, so it is.
200
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,880
Hey, let's give him a thrill--
201
00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:24,289
let him spend recess with the big kids.
202
00:08:24,375 --> 00:08:25,535
Really? You mean it?
203
00:08:25,625 --> 00:08:28,825
Uh, yeah, sure. Go get him.
204
00:08:28,917 --> 00:08:31,207
It'll be a blast.
205
00:08:32,458 --> 00:08:34,748
Hey, they want you
to come hang out with us.
206
00:08:34,834 --> 00:08:35,834
Get out!
207
00:08:35,917 --> 00:08:36,917
No, really.
208
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,960
Really? Well, okay.
209
00:08:41,583 --> 00:08:43,923
H-Hi. Hi, guys.
210
00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:47,460
Hey! Oh! Whoa!
211
00:08:47,542 --> 00:08:50,082
Hey, guys, I'm claustrophobic.
212
00:08:50,166 --> 00:08:52,036
Come on! Get me out of here!
213
00:08:52,125 --> 00:08:55,035
Hey, hey! What are you doing, guys?
214
00:08:55,125 --> 00:08:57,325
[shouting]
215
00:08:57,417 --> 00:08:59,667
Oh, my gosh. I can't believe it.
216
00:08:59,750 --> 00:09:01,830
I was part of a dastardly plot
217
00:09:01,917 --> 00:09:03,827
to trash-can my best friend.
218
00:09:03,917 --> 00:09:04,997
What have I become?
219
00:09:05,083 --> 00:09:07,213
You're a fifth grader, man.
220
00:09:07,291 --> 00:09:09,541
Come on. Let's go do some more.
221
00:09:09,625 --> 00:09:14,205
[kids] Trash can! Trash can!
Trash can! Trash can!
222
00:09:24,375 --> 00:09:27,075
Leonard, I didn't mean to, um...
223
00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:29,746
I-I didn't want to, uh, have--
224
00:09:29,834 --> 00:09:31,924
I tried to, um...
225
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,330
Oh.
226
00:09:42,417 --> 00:09:45,417
Oh, nothing feels right
to me anymore, Mrs. H.
227
00:09:45,500 --> 00:09:47,420
I miss the fourth grade.
228
00:09:47,500 --> 00:09:50,210
I miss salt-and-flour maps
of South American countries
229
00:09:50,291 --> 00:09:52,001
and multiplying with jellybeans.
230
00:09:52,083 --> 00:09:54,003
I miss singing protest songs
231
00:09:54,083 --> 00:09:56,963
on Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday.
232
00:09:57,041 --> 00:10:00,881
♪ We shall not be moved ♪
233
00:10:00,959 --> 00:10:03,919
And most of all, I miss my friend Leonard.
234
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:05,580
He's my pal.
235
00:10:05,667 --> 00:10:07,577
I want to go through the grades
236
00:10:07,667 --> 00:10:09,247
with him by my side,
237
00:10:09,333 --> 00:10:11,583
not upside down in a trash can.
238
00:10:11,667 --> 00:10:13,077
[gasps] What?
239
00:10:13,166 --> 00:10:14,786
Uh, that's just a for-instance.
240
00:10:14,875 --> 00:10:17,705
Aw, don't you see what
I'm sayin' here, teach?
241
00:10:17,792 --> 00:10:20,082
I thought I was ready to grow up,
242
00:10:20,166 --> 00:10:21,496
but I was wrong.
243
00:10:21,583 --> 00:10:25,083
I love the fourth grade
and I want to come back.
244
00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:26,996
I want to be here now!
245
00:10:27,083 --> 00:10:28,923
[door opens]
246
00:10:30,458 --> 00:10:33,578
Well, if that doesn't
just make me want to cry,
247
00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:35,577
I don't know what.
248
00:10:35,667 --> 00:10:37,877
Oh, come here.
249
00:10:45,417 --> 00:10:47,707
[bell rings]
250
00:10:49,917 --> 00:10:53,327
[whistling]
251
00:10:53,417 --> 00:10:55,377
Hey, what do you want to do, Miles?
252
00:10:55,458 --> 00:10:56,998
I don't know.
253
00:10:57,083 --> 00:10:59,583
Say, Max, we haven't trash-canned
254
00:10:59,667 --> 00:11:01,577
any little kids in a while.
255
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:08,500
[shouting]
256
00:11:08,583 --> 00:11:10,253
[roars]
257
00:11:10,333 --> 00:11:12,333
And don't bother us anymore!
258
00:11:12,375 --> 00:11:14,875
Hold on, buddy. I'll get you out of there.
259
00:11:17,041 --> 00:11:19,831
[howls]
260
00:11:19,917 --> 00:11:22,707
How come nobody likes this?
261
00:11:26,041 --> 00:11:27,461
[whistle blowing]
262
00:11:27,542 --> 00:11:28,962
[alarm sounding]
263
00:11:29,083 --> 00:11:30,633
[dogs barking]
264
00:11:30,709 --> 00:11:33,289
[siren wailing]
265
00:11:46,667 --> 00:11:48,077
Ew!
266
00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:51,246
I am dog. Ergo, I drool.
267
00:11:51,333 --> 00:11:54,333
Leonard, honey,
I've got to trit-trot next door
268
00:11:54,417 --> 00:11:57,457
and borrow a bag of broccoli
for dinner tonight.
269
00:11:57,542 --> 00:12:00,252
Stay in the yard
and keep an eye on Spot, okay?
270
00:12:00,333 --> 00:12:02,173
Okay, Mom!
271
00:12:02,250 --> 00:12:04,250
Hey, you hear that, Leonard?
272
00:12:04,333 --> 00:12:05,543
No.
273
00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:07,415
Just wait, boy ears. You will.
274
00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:09,290
[ice cream truck music playing ]
275
00:12:09,375 --> 00:12:11,495
[both] Ice cream!
276
00:12:13,625 --> 00:12:16,455
Ice cream. Mmm.
277
00:12:16,542 --> 00:12:19,172
I enjoy being a boy.
278
00:12:22,041 --> 00:12:23,961
Ooh! [zip]
279
00:12:24,041 --> 00:12:26,291
Never dress for ice cream in haste.
280
00:12:31,959 --> 00:12:36,079
Leonard Amadeus Helperman,
where have you been?
281
00:12:36,166 --> 00:12:38,206
Amadeus?
282
00:12:38,291 --> 00:12:41,671
Didn't I ask you to stay
right here in the yard?
283
00:12:41,750 --> 00:12:43,880
Well, but me and Scott--
I was only--
284
00:12:43,959 --> 00:12:45,419
yes, ma'am.
285
00:12:45,500 --> 00:12:48,880
And now Spot is gone!
I can't find him anywhere.
286
00:12:48,959 --> 00:12:51,629
I am very disappointed with you.
287
00:12:51,709 --> 00:12:54,829
After all, he is just a poor helpless dog.
288
00:12:54,917 --> 00:12:57,077
He doesn't know any better.
289
00:12:57,166 --> 00:12:59,956
There's no need to insult my intelligence.
290
00:13:00,041 --> 00:13:02,291
Oh, but perhaps you know the dog best.
291
00:13:02,375 --> 00:13:04,075
He lives in your home.
292
00:13:04,166 --> 00:13:06,576
Wait. I think I hear my mother calling me.
293
00:13:06,667 --> 00:13:08,577
Scott! Coming, mother!
294
00:13:09,750 --> 00:13:11,290
[barking]
295
00:13:11,375 --> 00:13:13,535
Oh, my poor little Spotty.
296
00:13:13,625 --> 00:13:15,785
You're back. [sobbing]
297
00:13:15,875 --> 00:13:18,825
We thought we'd lost you forever.
298
00:13:18,917 --> 00:13:21,247
Leonard, our doggy is safe,
299
00:13:21,333 --> 00:13:24,673
and we'll never, ever lose him again.
300
00:13:24,750 --> 00:13:27,250
[thinking] I should have thought
301
00:13:27,333 --> 00:13:29,673
of this prodigal dog scam years ago.
302
00:13:29,750 --> 00:13:31,750
This is sweet.
303
00:13:35,959 --> 00:13:37,209
Mrs. Helperman,
304
00:13:37,291 --> 00:13:39,251
when the Doggy Dyne Detecto collar
305
00:13:39,333 --> 00:13:40,583
hits the vortex of lasers
306
00:13:40,667 --> 00:13:42,327
that make up our invisible fence,
307
00:13:42,417 --> 00:13:44,787
it activates a spray of pungent odors
308
00:13:44,875 --> 00:13:46,665
that only animals can smell,
309
00:13:46,750 --> 00:13:48,960
driving the victim, er, doggy,
310
00:13:49,041 --> 00:13:51,881
away from the perimeter. To wit...
311
00:13:51,959 --> 00:13:54,169
[alarm sounding]
312
00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:55,630
[whimpers]
313
00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:57,329
Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!
314
00:13:57,417 --> 00:13:59,127
Foul! Yuck!
315
00:13:59,208 --> 00:14:02,078
Ohh, month-old mushu pork.
316
00:14:02,166 --> 00:14:05,126
Ugh. The horror, the horror.
317
00:14:05,208 --> 00:14:08,788
Your dog will never leave this yard again.
318
00:14:08,875 --> 00:14:10,995
Well, that's just dandy.
319
00:14:12,333 --> 00:14:13,583
Are you okay, Spot?
320
00:14:13,667 --> 00:14:16,627
Oh, fine. Just fine.
Of course I'm not okay!
321
00:14:16,709 --> 00:14:18,629
If I can't leave the yard,
322
00:14:18,709 --> 00:14:21,169
then I can't go to school tomorrow.
323
00:14:21,250 --> 00:14:23,790
That means I'll miss the history test
324
00:14:23,875 --> 00:14:25,375
and fail social studies,
325
00:14:25,458 --> 00:14:27,708
and then you can just toss Harvard,
326
00:14:27,792 --> 00:14:29,082
my naval career,
327
00:14:29,166 --> 00:14:31,076
and president pro tem of the senate
328
00:14:31,166 --> 00:14:33,076
right out the window, baby!
329
00:14:33,166 --> 00:14:35,076
Whoa, whoa, everything's going to be fine.
330
00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:36,746
I've got an idea.
331
00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:47,577
There. Spot is now totally safe.
332
00:14:47,667 --> 00:14:49,707
Yeah, but just to be really safe,
333
00:14:49,792 --> 00:14:51,752
shouldn't you tell me the code, too?
334
00:14:51,834 --> 00:14:54,254
You know, so I could turn off the fence
335
00:14:54,333 --> 00:14:56,543
in case you're going to be home late
336
00:14:56,625 --> 00:14:59,415
or, like, the house blows up or something.
337
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:02,670
Well, yes, you should know the code,
338
00:15:02,750 --> 00:15:04,630
but you have to promise
339
00:15:04,709 --> 00:15:08,039
you won't ever, ever turn the system off
340
00:15:08,125 --> 00:15:10,325
unless you ask me first.
341
00:15:10,458 --> 00:15:12,788
Yes, ma'am. I promise.
342
00:15:12,875 --> 00:15:14,205
[groans]
343
00:15:14,291 --> 00:15:16,831
Well, okey-dokey, then.
Let's get ready to scoot.
344
00:15:18,625 --> 00:15:21,035
Okay, I'll just be
a little late to school,
345
00:15:21,125 --> 00:15:22,705
but I won't miss the history test.
346
00:15:22,792 --> 00:15:23,882
I can handle that.
347
00:15:23,959 --> 00:15:25,669
Spot, I can't turn the fence off.
348
00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:27,670
I just promised my mom.
349
00:15:27,750 --> 00:15:29,880
Yes, but... You didn't promise her
350
00:15:29,959 --> 00:15:32,579
you wouldn't tell me the security code
351
00:15:32,667 --> 00:15:34,627
so I could turn it off.
352
00:15:34,709 --> 00:15:36,919
Tell you the security--
353
00:15:37,041 --> 00:15:39,211
you don't even have to tell me the code.
354
00:15:39,291 --> 00:15:41,211
You can accidentally cough it out.
355
00:15:41,291 --> 00:15:43,541
You could burp it out. You know...
356
00:15:43,625 --> 00:15:46,535
[burps] 1, 2, 3.
357
00:15:46,667 --> 00:15:49,327
Need I go on? You get the picture.
358
00:15:49,417 --> 00:15:51,127
I guess I could do that.
359
00:15:51,208 --> 00:15:54,248
[Mrs. Helperman]
Leonard, honey, time to go.
360
00:15:54,333 --> 00:15:56,423
Leonard, my freedom is on the line here.
361
00:15:56,500 --> 00:15:58,540
You're going to help me, right?
362
00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:00,827
I don't know, Spot. I did make a promise.
363
00:16:00,917 --> 00:16:03,627
But maybe your freedom
is more important than that.
364
00:16:03,750 --> 00:16:05,420
But what if I get caught?
365
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:08,420
Is your freedom worth having
my mom never trust me again?
366
00:16:08,500 --> 00:16:10,500
I'm sorry. I-I-I just--
367
00:16:10,583 --> 00:16:12,333
come on, Mr. Lollygagger.
368
00:16:12,458 --> 00:16:13,538
Aah!
369
00:16:13,625 --> 00:16:15,245
[all] With liberty
370
00:16:15,375 --> 00:16:18,495
and justice for all.
371
00:16:18,583 --> 00:16:21,833
All except me, right, Leonard?
372
00:16:21,959 --> 00:16:24,329
[groans]
373
00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:27,577
And we call this unpaired electron
374
00:16:27,667 --> 00:16:29,667
a free radical.
375
00:16:29,750 --> 00:16:31,540
Ha ha ha.
376
00:16:31,625 --> 00:16:35,245
Electrons can be free but not a dog?
377
00:16:35,375 --> 00:16:37,535
Don't I deserve the same rights
378
00:16:37,625 --> 00:16:39,455
as a subatomic particle?
379
00:16:39,542 --> 00:16:41,082
[groans]
380
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:45,376
So, in 1860, America elected
a great president
381
00:16:45,458 --> 00:16:49,668
who was also a super-duper
champion of freedom--
382
00:16:49,750 --> 00:16:51,540
Abraham Lincoln.
383
00:16:51,625 --> 00:16:52,495
Ha ha.
384
00:16:54,625 --> 00:16:56,455
Whew.
385
00:16:56,542 --> 00:16:59,332
Go home and free your dog, son.
386
00:16:59,458 --> 00:17:01,668
Aah! I don't know what to do!
387
00:17:01,792 --> 00:17:03,712
Can't you just leave me alone?
388
00:17:03,834 --> 00:17:06,294
You're strange.
389
00:17:06,375 --> 00:17:08,375
Leonard, honey,
390
00:17:08,500 --> 00:17:10,420
are you all right?
391
00:17:10,542 --> 00:17:12,752
Uh, you know,
392
00:17:12,834 --> 00:17:15,504
all of a sudden, I'm not feeling so well.
393
00:17:15,583 --> 00:17:17,753
[playing the blues]
394
00:17:20,333 --> 00:17:21,633
[sighs]
395
00:17:21,709 --> 00:17:23,669
I had such plans, too.
396
00:17:23,750 --> 00:17:27,420
Did you know I was going to be
the first dog elected pope?
397
00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:29,420
Spot, you are going to be free.
398
00:17:29,500 --> 00:17:34,040
Leonard, you broke a promise
to your sainted mother.
399
00:17:34,125 --> 00:17:35,415
I knew you had it in you.
400
00:17:35,500 --> 00:17:37,420
Quick-- let's turn off that fence and get
out of here.
401
00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:38,880
Not so fast.
402
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:42,420
I promised my mom
I wouldn't turn off the fence,
403
00:17:42,500 --> 00:17:43,920
but I didn't promise her
404
00:17:44,041 --> 00:17:46,381
I wouldn't get you out of your collar.
405
00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:05,495
[both] Nah.
406
00:18:05,583 --> 00:18:08,083
I don't see what the big problem is.
407
00:18:08,166 --> 00:18:10,456
Why don't you just collapse your bones
408
00:18:10,542 --> 00:18:12,582
and slip out like me?
409
00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:15,710
I know, Spot.
410
00:18:15,792 --> 00:18:17,212
Why don't you grow a pair of wings
411
00:18:17,291 --> 00:18:19,211
and fly over the fence?
412
00:18:19,291 --> 00:18:22,131
You guys leave Spot alone.
He's in a lot of pain.
413
00:18:22,208 --> 00:18:24,708
That's it! I'll fly over the fence.
414
00:18:24,792 --> 00:18:27,542
And he's losing his mind.
415
00:18:27,625 --> 00:18:30,705
Ha ha. No. No, I'm not crazy, Leonard.
416
00:18:30,792 --> 00:18:34,382
Not crazy at all. Ha ha ha ha ha.
417
00:18:34,500 --> 00:18:36,210
Ah ha ha ha ha!
418
00:18:36,291 --> 00:18:39,171
Ah ha ha ha ha!
419
00:18:39,250 --> 00:18:43,330
Okay, I can see where the cackling
might make you wonder.
420
00:18:43,417 --> 00:18:46,417
Boys, I've got a brilliant plan.
421
00:18:50,542 --> 00:18:52,172
Oh, I get it.
422
00:18:52,250 --> 00:18:54,040
You're warming us up
for your brilliant plan
423
00:18:54,125 --> 00:18:57,375
by making us start out
with this stupid plan!
424
00:18:57,458 --> 00:19:01,208
Just make sure you lower me
on the other side of the fence.
425
00:19:01,291 --> 00:19:03,211
And stop all that licking.
426
00:19:03,291 --> 00:19:04,961
Muddle-headed escape attempts
427
00:19:05,041 --> 00:19:06,961
make me nervous, so sue me.
428
00:19:07,083 --> 00:19:09,543
Can we all stop fighting and do this?
429
00:19:09,625 --> 00:19:11,665
Spot's freedom is at stake.
430
00:19:11,792 --> 00:19:13,832
Yes, and, uh, more importantly,
431
00:19:13,917 --> 00:19:16,707
this harness is starting to ride up.
432
00:19:16,792 --> 00:19:19,502
[high-pitched voice] Let's go!
433
00:19:25,291 --> 00:19:27,461
Hey, what's going on up there?
434
00:19:27,542 --> 00:19:30,502
[coughs]
Oh, no. Oh, yuck.
435
00:19:30,625 --> 00:19:32,995
[coughing] Hairball.
436
00:19:33,125 --> 00:19:35,665
I told you to stop licking yourself.
437
00:19:35,750 --> 00:19:37,130
Oh, dear, it's a big one.
438
00:19:37,250 --> 00:19:38,710
That's disgusting.
439
00:19:38,792 --> 00:19:39,672
Oh!
440
00:19:39,792 --> 00:19:42,962
Pretty Boy, stop flapping.
441
00:19:43,041 --> 00:19:45,421
Steady, guys. Steady!
442
00:19:45,542 --> 00:19:47,422
Ah-choo!
443
00:19:47,542 --> 00:19:50,752
Ahh!
444
00:19:53,417 --> 00:19:56,747
-Ugh! [coughs]
-Ugh! [coughs]
445
00:19:56,834 --> 00:19:58,884
Here I go again.
446
00:19:58,959 --> 00:20:02,169
I made it, fellas!
Your sacrifice was not in vain.
447
00:20:02,250 --> 00:20:05,630
I'm free. Free, I say. Free!
448
00:20:05,709 --> 00:20:08,419
[siren wails]
449
00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:13,129
In future, escape first, celebrate later.
450
00:20:17,166 --> 00:20:20,376
All right, uh... Spot,
451
00:20:20,500 --> 00:20:21,880
come with me, nobody gets hurt.
452
00:20:21,959 --> 00:20:23,499
You leave my dog alone.
453
00:20:23,583 --> 00:20:27,003
Boy, I'm going to have to
ask you to stand back!
454
00:20:27,083 --> 00:20:28,503
[tires squeal]
455
00:20:28,625 --> 00:20:30,915
What is going on here?
456
00:20:31,041 --> 00:20:32,041
No need to worry, ma'am.
457
00:20:32,125 --> 00:20:33,745
The subject made an escape attempt,
458
00:20:33,834 --> 00:20:36,134
but Doggy Dyne is on the job.
459
00:20:36,208 --> 00:20:38,378
We're going to take care of him
460
00:20:38,458 --> 00:20:41,378
as soon as your son here
gets out of the way.
461
00:20:41,458 --> 00:20:44,828
Leonard, I sent you home sick, honey.
462
00:20:44,917 --> 00:20:47,287
I know, but Spot's my dog.
463
00:20:47,375 --> 00:20:49,205
I just had to come out and defend him.
464
00:20:50,792 --> 00:20:52,462
Mr. Doggy Dyne, this isn't working out.
465
00:20:52,542 --> 00:20:56,132
I want you to take your laser-
cyber-detecto things out of here
466
00:20:56,208 --> 00:20:57,708
and let my dog live in peace,
467
00:20:57,834 --> 00:20:59,044
is that clear?
468
00:20:59,166 --> 00:21:00,626
Yeah, but we--
469
00:21:00,750 --> 00:21:01,920
well, I was only--
470
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:03,210
yes, ma'am.
471
00:21:12,083 --> 00:21:13,293
[sighs]
472
00:21:13,375 --> 00:21:15,035
Sweet freedom.
473
00:21:15,542 --> 00:21:17,582
Oh, poor Spot.
474
00:21:17,667 --> 00:21:19,877
I just wanted you to be safe.
475
00:21:19,959 --> 00:21:21,879
Know what, mom? After today,
476
00:21:21,959 --> 00:21:24,879
I don't think Spot will ever
try running away again.
477
00:21:24,959 --> 00:21:26,669
[ice cream truck music playing]
478
00:21:26,792 --> 00:21:30,292
Do you feel well enough
to have an ice pop?
479
00:21:30,375 --> 00:21:32,625
I think I could handle that.
480
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,920
[groans]
481
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:40,540
In fact, I think I'm feeling well enough
to eat two ice pops.
482
00:21:41,750 --> 00:21:44,580
Now that's a dog's best friend.
483
00:21:44,667 --> 00:21:48,327
Ugh. Smells like rancid pork around here.
484
00:21:48,417 --> 00:21:50,077
Ah ha ha ha ha!
485
00:21:50,208 --> 00:21:53,918
Laugh it up, dog boy. Laugh it up.
33370
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