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1
00:00:00,134 --> 00:00:02,844
¶¶
2
00:00:08,442 --> 00:00:10,482
¶ Look at that sun Look at that sky
3
00:00:10,478 --> 00:00:13,208
¶ Look at my sweater vest I look so fly
4
00:00:13,214 --> 00:00:15,714
¶ Look at that mailbox Look at that tree
5
00:00:15,716 --> 00:00:18,246
¶ It's about as beautiful As it can be
6
00:00:20,788 --> 00:00:23,288
¶ Today is gonna Be exceptional
7
00:00:23,290 --> 00:00:25,720
¶ Never boring Even for a minute
8
00:00:25,726 --> 00:00:28,056
¶ It's my world And we're all livin' in it
9
00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:35,700
¶ Never boring Even for a minute
10
00:00:35,703 --> 00:00:38,273
¶ It's my world And we're all livin' in it ¶
11
00:00:45,579 --> 00:00:47,479
ZACK: I got her.
I got her. Take that!
12
00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,311
MELISSA: I shall resist!
13
00:00:49,316 --> 00:00:51,346
Oh! So much for resisting!
14
00:00:51,352 --> 00:00:53,192
MILO: Wait, let me...
Wait up!
15
00:00:53,187 --> 00:00:55,217
No, no, no, no, no!
No! No!
16
00:00:55,222 --> 00:00:57,392
(GROANS) No!
17
00:00:57,391 --> 00:01:01,361
(SIGHS IN EXASPERATION)
One of these days I'll
actually get to finish a game.
18
00:01:01,362 --> 00:01:02,662
Murphy's Law.
19
00:01:02,663 --> 00:01:04,263
Has it always
been like this?
20
00:01:04,265 --> 00:01:05,395
Pretty much.
21
00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,499
I remember the day when
we first met Milo.
22
00:01:07,501 --> 00:01:09,801
It was about
13 years ago.
23
00:01:11,205 --> 00:01:12,435
(GLASS SHATTERING)
(LOUD CRASHING)
24
00:01:19,380 --> 00:01:20,950
Sara, is your father
home yet?
25
00:01:20,948 --> 00:01:22,778
Nope.
Hmm.
26
00:01:22,783 --> 00:01:24,523
Murphy's Law and no Martin.
27
00:01:25,453 --> 00:01:27,093
I guess we're having a boy.
28
00:01:28,522 --> 00:01:30,462
Oops. Right now!
29
00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:32,058
Sara!
Yeah, I'm on it.
30
00:01:32,059 --> 00:01:33,359
Call an ambulance.
31
00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:34,690
Aw, Mom.
32
00:01:34,695 --> 00:01:36,555
Oh, hey.
How did you and Melissa meet?
33
00:01:36,564 --> 00:01:39,204
When we first met,
it was...
Harrowing.
34
00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:42,300
I was gonna say first grade,
but, yeah.
35
00:01:42,303 --> 00:01:43,803
It was the first day of school,
36
00:01:43,804 --> 00:01:46,114
and I don't mind saying, I was pretty excited.
37
00:01:46,107 --> 00:01:48,607
I was thrilled at the prospect of meeting new friends.
38
00:01:49,743 --> 00:01:51,813
I was also a little nervous, too.
39
00:01:51,812 --> 00:01:54,312
I had never really been away from Mom and Dad before.
40
00:01:56,217 --> 00:01:59,047
But I knew it would be okay, because I had my backpack.
41
00:02:01,422 --> 00:02:03,222
(BARKING)
42
00:02:04,125 --> 00:02:05,585
Diogee, go home.
43
00:02:05,593 --> 00:02:07,693
You're not supposed to
be in line for the bus.
44
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:10,463
(BARKS)
45
00:02:11,432 --> 00:02:12,632
(WHINES)
46
00:02:12,633 --> 00:02:15,433
Hi, I'm Melissa Chase,
age six.
47
00:02:15,436 --> 00:02:16,936
I'm precocious.
48
00:02:16,937 --> 00:02:18,467
HI, I'm Milo Murphy.
49
00:02:18,472 --> 00:02:19,972
I'm... hazardous.
50
00:02:19,974 --> 00:02:22,844
We just met, so now we're
gonna be best friends.
51
00:02:22,843 --> 00:02:25,813
We're not best friends
just because we met.
52
00:02:25,813 --> 00:02:28,113
I mean, we're not four.
53
00:02:28,115 --> 00:02:30,015
Okay. How does it work?
54
00:02:30,017 --> 00:02:32,747
Well, best friends share
goals and ideals
55
00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:35,693
which they cultivate by
having shared experiences.
56
00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:36,859
Oh, okay.
57
00:02:36,857 --> 00:02:40,357
By the way, I'm noticing
you have a lot of owies.
58
00:02:40,361 --> 00:02:41,461
Yes, I do.
59
00:02:41,462 --> 00:02:43,332
And I earned
every one of 'em.
60
00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:45,900
And your backpack
is really big.
61
00:02:45,900 --> 00:02:48,370
I need my backpack
because of Murphy's Law.
62
00:02:48,369 --> 00:02:50,339
I have no idea
what that means.
63
00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,378
Melissa, are you okay?
64
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:00,350
Yeah, I'm good.
65
00:03:00,347 --> 00:03:01,607
What was that
all about?
66
00:03:01,615 --> 00:03:03,215
Oh, that's just
Murphy's Law.
67
00:03:03,217 --> 00:03:06,247
Anything that can
go wrong around me,
will go wrong.
68
00:03:11,825 --> 00:03:13,225
Uh, Dad?
69
00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:16,462
Diogee.
70
00:03:16,463 --> 00:03:18,003
We're gonna have to
keep an eye on you.
71
00:03:17,998 --> 00:03:19,058
(DIOGEE BARKS)
72
00:03:23,804 --> 00:03:25,244
Have a seat.
73
00:03:25,239 --> 00:03:28,539
Mm. Might be safer
to be over here, then.
74
00:03:30,311 --> 00:03:31,981
Or maybe over here.
75
00:03:35,482 --> 00:03:36,822
Yeah, this is good.
76
00:03:36,817 --> 00:03:38,347
Oh. Okay.
77
00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:39,592
I understand.
78
00:03:55,502 --> 00:03:59,202
DOOFENSHMIRTZ: But it wasn't till I got outside the photo store
79
00:03:59,206 --> 00:04:01,266
that my life changed forever.
80
00:04:01,275 --> 00:04:03,305
I had a nemesis.
81
00:04:05,079 --> 00:04:08,079
That was how I
first met
Perry the Platypus.
82
00:04:08,082 --> 00:04:10,452
So, how did you and that
fussy old guy meet?
83
00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:12,381
It was a long time ago,
84
00:04:12,386 --> 00:04:13,616
in the future.
85
00:04:13,621 --> 00:04:15,391
ANNOUNCER:
New time agent recruits.
86
00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:17,619
Please select a vehicle for your driving test.
87
00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:19,285
If you survive today,
88
00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:21,433
you'll get your first assignment and partners tomorrow.
89
00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,058
Thank you.
90
00:04:23,063 --> 00:04:25,603
"The time delineation gear
is for quick trips
in local space
91
00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:28,869
"allowing you to move
three times faster
than local time."
92
00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:30,469
Ooh! Super speed!
93
00:04:31,905 --> 00:04:34,565
All right, Cavendish.
You are on your way
to becoming
94
00:04:34,575 --> 00:04:36,535
a fully fledged time agent.
95
00:04:36,543 --> 00:04:38,443
This deserves a lolly!
96
00:04:40,114 --> 00:04:41,754
Slide over, stretch.
I need a ride.
97
00:04:41,749 --> 00:04:43,419
Wait a moment!
Who are you?
98
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:44,917
Is this for me?
Thanks!
99
00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:45,978
That's mine!
100
00:04:45,986 --> 00:04:47,886
Ugh! What flavor is this?
101
00:04:47,888 --> 00:04:49,488
Black currant.
102
00:04:49,490 --> 00:04:51,560
I'm not even gonna ask
what that is.
103
00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:52,888
(CAR POWERS UP)
Wait, wait, wait!
104
00:04:52,893 --> 00:04:54,393
What are you doing?
No, no, no, no.
Wait! Don't!
105
00:05:01,935 --> 00:05:03,835
What. Was. That?
106
00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,098
Shortcut through
the Mesozoic.
107
00:05:06,106 --> 00:05:08,406
Come on, let's get
some burritos.
108
00:05:10,844 --> 00:05:12,984
Tres burritos, Rita.
109
00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:15,310
That means,
"Three burritos, Rita."
110
00:05:15,316 --> 00:05:16,546
Great crabknuckles.
111
00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:20,520
You risked our lives
for a lousy burrito?
112
00:05:20,521 --> 00:05:24,361
No, no, no. I risked
our lives for
an amazing burrito.
113
00:05:24,358 --> 00:05:27,628
So good, it only exists
in this time and place.
114
00:05:27,628 --> 00:05:29,088
You want nachos
with yours?
115
00:05:29,096 --> 00:05:30,926
You would make
a terrible partner.
116
00:05:30,931 --> 00:05:32,501
Yeah? Oh,
I wasn't asking.
117
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:58,019
So! What've you got
in the backpack?
118
00:06:00,294 --> 00:06:02,464
Oh, boy.
First day of school.
119
00:06:02,463 --> 00:06:04,863
It's a new day for you,
Bradley Nicholson.
120
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:07,665
This is a small jar
of vinegar
and a piece of oak.
121
00:06:07,668 --> 00:06:09,568
And a big...
You have
a giant hook?
122
00:06:09,570 --> 00:06:11,040
Wow. Way to bury
the lede.
123
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:14,608
There it is, Dad.
The Snowflyer 1.5.
124
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:17,478
I can't wait to get
this baby up
on the mountain.
125
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:23,751
Okay, I can't wait to get
Snowflyer 2
up on the mountain.
126
00:06:23,751 --> 00:06:25,981
So, what'd you use
a grappling hook for?
127
00:06:27,187 --> 00:06:28,787
(SCREAMS)
128
00:06:29,757 --> 00:06:31,717
Hey. What happened
to the bus?
129
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:33,425
Murphy's Law.
Yeah.
130
00:06:33,427 --> 00:06:34,887
He's my...
131
00:06:35,863 --> 00:06:39,063
Oh, Milo Murphy.
132
00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,597
I'm not sure
I like this.
133
00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:42,732
Don't worry.
You'll get used to it.
134
00:06:49,576 --> 00:06:51,176
(JET ENGINE BUZZES)
135
00:06:54,248 --> 00:06:55,608
Here. Quick,
put this on.
136
00:06:55,616 --> 00:06:56,776
You might need it.
137
00:07:05,526 --> 00:07:07,186
(DOLPHINS CLICKING)
138
00:07:07,194 --> 00:07:08,694
Well, this
is pretty cool.
139
00:07:08,695 --> 00:07:10,225
CAVENDISH:
It's in the manual.
140
00:07:10,230 --> 00:07:13,530
Page nine, paragraph 15,
line five.
141
00:07:13,534 --> 00:07:17,404
A recruit may not use
a company vehicle
for personal use.
142
00:07:17,404 --> 00:07:19,444
There are rules, man.
143
00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:21,870
I know. I just don't
always choose to follow them.
144
00:07:21,875 --> 00:07:24,735
When we get back
to our own time,
145
00:07:24,745 --> 00:07:26,845
I will be reporting you
to the proper authorities.
146
00:07:26,847 --> 00:07:28,877
Not everything's
in the manual.
147
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:31,522
Sometimes you gotta improvise
when the unexpected happens.
148
00:07:31,518 --> 00:07:32,818
Like that.
149
00:07:35,122 --> 00:07:36,922
Oh, no!
Those kids need help!
150
00:07:36,924 --> 00:07:37,994
Come on.
Let's role.
151
00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:42,027
What are you doing?
152
00:07:42,029 --> 00:07:44,329
Yeah, that looked
a lot cooler in my head.
153
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:47,969
(JET ENGINE BUZZES BY)
154
00:07:54,842 --> 00:07:56,242
Oh, no. We're going
to lose them.
155
00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:57,643
Not if I can help it.
156
00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:11,286
CAVENDISH:
Now they're
going too fast.
157
00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:12,361
What're we gonna do?
158
00:08:16,864 --> 00:08:18,734
And now
they're airborne.
159
00:08:18,732 --> 00:08:21,602
Wait. We'll use the
time delineation gear.
160
00:08:21,602 --> 00:08:23,802
The what now?
It's the
time delineation gear.
161
00:08:23,804 --> 00:08:26,674
It allows you to move
three times faster
than local time.
162
00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:28,113
That is
in the manual.
163
00:08:28,976 --> 00:08:31,036
(SLOW VIOLIN MUSIC PLAYING)
164
00:08:44,691 --> 00:08:45,761
Hang on.
165
00:08:52,299 --> 00:08:53,369
Woo-hoo!
166
00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:55,727
We're actually
driving on water.
167
00:08:55,736 --> 00:08:57,866
Yeah, I bet that
wasn't in your manual.
168
00:09:02,643 --> 00:09:03,943
Hey, you got 'em?
Got 'em.
169
00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:13,789
(BRAKES SCREECH)
170
00:09:15,556 --> 00:09:16,856
Boss, take it
outta gear!
171
00:09:16,857 --> 00:09:18,157
Take it
outta gear!
172
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:19,218
(BOTH SCREAMING)
173
00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:22,828
That was amazing.
174
00:09:23,864 --> 00:09:26,734
(CHILDREN LAUGHING)
175
00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:28,833
So, Murphy's Law.
176
00:09:28,835 --> 00:09:31,395
Things happen and you
just have to roll with it?
177
00:09:31,405 --> 00:09:33,665
Well, yeah,
that's pretty much it.
178
00:09:33,674 --> 00:09:35,844
Cool. I'm in.
179
00:09:35,842 --> 00:09:37,412
Really?
Yeah.
180
00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:38,781
I mean,
it was scary at first,
181
00:09:38,779 --> 00:09:40,409
but you made it
look so easy.
182
00:09:40,414 --> 00:09:41,754
You mean it?
Yeah.
183
00:09:41,748 --> 00:09:43,178
You're really nice, Milo.
184
00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:46,123
So, does this mean
we can be friends?
185
00:09:46,119 --> 00:09:47,389
After that ride?
186
00:09:47,387 --> 00:09:49,147
We're gonna be
best friends.
187
00:09:56,797 --> 00:09:59,967
Oh, Milo Murphy.
188
00:09:59,967 --> 00:10:02,797
Wow, you really do make
a terrible first impression.
189
00:10:02,803 --> 00:10:04,573
He does.
I do.
190
00:10:04,571 --> 00:10:06,871
DOOFENSHMIRTZ: Oh, so that's
how you met Cavendish.
191
00:10:06,873 --> 00:10:08,973
Yeah, that was
a cool story, bro.
192
00:10:08,976 --> 00:10:10,536
Uh, I'm not done.
193
00:10:10,544 --> 00:10:12,114
What, you're not?
194
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:14,282
'Cause you just saved
a bunch of kids,
I just assumed it was...
195
00:10:14,281 --> 00:10:16,251
Okay, okay,
I'm sitting back down.
196
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:18,479
So, let me tell you
what happened the next day.
197
00:10:18,485 --> 00:10:19,845
MR. BLOCK: Come in already.
198
00:10:21,922 --> 00:10:23,992
Okay, let's see
what we got here.
199
00:10:23,991 --> 00:10:27,091
Recruit No. 68427,
Cavendish.
200
00:10:27,094 --> 00:10:28,564
This is your new partner,
201
00:10:28,562 --> 00:10:29,932
Vinnie Dakota.
202
00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:31,900
Hoo boy.
It's you.
203
00:10:31,898 --> 00:10:34,098
Wait a minute,
do you two know each other?
204
00:10:34,101 --> 00:10:35,471
Here it comes.
205
00:10:35,469 --> 00:10:37,999
I'll tell you exactly
what I know about this man.
206
00:10:38,005 --> 00:10:39,165
When someone
is in trouble,
207
00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:41,712
he's a good man
to have around.
208
00:10:41,708 --> 00:10:43,608
Balthazar Cavendish,
209
00:10:43,610 --> 00:10:45,380
pleased to make
your acquaintance, sir.
210
00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:47,676
Pleased as well.
211
00:10:47,681 --> 00:10:49,281
And thanks.
Don't mention it.
212
00:10:49,282 --> 00:10:50,352
I won't
213
00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:51,980
Although I might. Later.
214
00:10:51,985 --> 00:10:52,845
I'm sure you will.
215
00:10:55,355 --> 00:10:57,585
Whatever. Get out
of my office.
216
00:10:57,591 --> 00:11:00,031
And that's how
Cavendish and I
became partners.
217
00:11:00,027 --> 00:11:01,827
Wow, my story
was totally better.
218
00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:04,158
It's not a contest.
No, no, I mean...
219
00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:05,834
But if it was,
you know...(CHUCKLES)
220
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:07,602
Winner!
221
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:09,370
¶ It's my world and we're all livin' in it ¶
222
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:14,144
This is Chad reporting
for the Jefferson G.
County School Channel.
223
00:11:14,141 --> 00:11:16,341
It's only eight hours
till tonight's
Speech and Debate
224
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:17,613
League of Death
and Destruction
225
00:11:17,611 --> 00:11:19,041
Crosstown Explosion Event.
226
00:11:19,046 --> 00:11:21,046
So preparations are underway.
227
00:11:23,016 --> 00:11:24,876
ZACK: Milo, isn't this
speech and debate?
228
00:11:24,885 --> 00:11:26,715
Why is there
a wrestling ring here?
229
00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:29,690
After all the excitement
of Athledecamathlon
and Cake 'Splosion,
230
00:11:29,690 --> 00:11:31,060
most scholastic competitions
231
00:11:31,058 --> 00:11:32,558
have added
an athletic element.
232
00:11:32,559 --> 00:11:34,959
There's Melissa
and her team practicing.
233
00:11:34,961 --> 00:11:36,161
Pro, con.
234
00:11:36,163 --> 00:11:39,033
Practice topic is,
"Running water
on your toothbrush
235
00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:40,802
"before you brush them."
Go!
236
00:11:40,801 --> 00:11:42,401
Pro, getting your
toothbrush wet first
237
00:11:42,402 --> 00:11:44,072
makes the toothpaste stick.
238
00:11:44,071 --> 00:11:45,541
Con.
239
00:11:45,539 --> 00:11:47,169
The water softens the bristles
so they don't clean as well.
240
00:11:47,174 --> 00:11:50,584
Wow. I had no idea
speech and debate
was like this.
241
00:11:50,577 --> 00:11:53,207
It really got my heart rate
up to aerobic levels.
242
00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:54,413
And I was just watching.
243
00:11:54,414 --> 00:11:55,984
That's the idea,
actually.
244
00:11:55,982 --> 00:11:57,382
We've been
training for months.
245
00:11:57,384 --> 00:11:58,554
Yes, months.
246
00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:00,652
And Milo's mere presence,
here at this practice,
247
00:12:00,654 --> 00:12:01,994
could blow
the whole thing.
248
00:12:01,988 --> 00:12:03,488
Aw, come on, Bradley.
(CLOTH TEARING)
249
00:12:03,490 --> 00:12:04,920
(BOTH SCREAM)
(CRASHES)
250
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:07,890
See?
251
00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,664
Milo, Zack, please.
252
00:12:09,663 --> 00:12:11,063
I need you two
to fill in on the team.
253
00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:12,934
Gee, I don't know, Melissa.
254
00:12:12,933 --> 00:12:14,903
Arguing just doesn't
come naturally to me.
255
00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:16,201
Yeah, it does.
256
00:12:16,203 --> 00:12:17,273
No, it doesn't.
257
00:12:17,270 --> 00:12:19,570
Yeah, it does.
No, it...
258
00:12:19,573 --> 00:12:21,513
Oh...(CHUCKLES) Hey.
259
00:12:21,508 --> 00:12:22,568
I'll take that
as a "yes."
260
00:12:22,576 --> 00:12:23,636
(SPRINGS CREAKING)
261
00:12:24,344 --> 00:12:25,444
If you don't mind,
262
00:12:25,445 --> 00:12:27,905
please get Milo
as far away as possible.
263
00:12:27,914 --> 00:12:29,114
Like, Alaska.
264
00:12:31,685 --> 00:12:33,935
(BLOWS WHISTLES)
All right, boys,
265
00:12:33,936 --> 00:12:36,186
in each debate,
one of us gets the pro side
and one gets the con,
266
00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:38,889
but you'll need to do it
using your body,
not just your mouth.
267
00:12:38,892 --> 00:12:42,132
Points are distributed
for verbal acuity
as well as physical technique.
268
00:12:42,129 --> 00:12:43,189
Let's get to work.
269
00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:46,101
An apple a day
keeps the doctor away.
270
00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:47,999
Oranges have
more vitamin C.
271
00:12:48,001 --> 00:12:50,141
Cats are more
self-sufficient.
272
00:12:50,137 --> 00:12:51,697
But dogs can fetch
your slippers.
273
00:12:51,705 --> 00:12:54,235
Sports montages
are overused.
274
00:12:54,241 --> 00:12:56,641
But they're an economical way
to further the story...
(GRUNTS)
275
00:12:56,643 --> 00:12:57,943
Yes
No.
276
00:12:57,944 --> 00:12:59,044
Yes.
No.
277
00:12:59,045 --> 00:13:01,545
Golf's not a sport,
it's a pastime.
278
00:13:01,915 --> 00:13:03,005
I agree.
279
00:13:05,085 --> 00:13:07,545
ZACK: Country music
is better than western music.
280
00:13:07,554 --> 00:13:09,494
I did not know
there was a difference.
281
00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:12,057
You guys ready?
282
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:13,928
Seems like we've been
training for days,
283
00:13:13,927 --> 00:13:15,227
but it's only
been 32 minutes.
284
00:13:15,228 --> 00:13:17,798
I'm still not sure
I got enough
practice debates in.
285
00:13:17,798 --> 00:13:19,128
You got this, Milo.
286
00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:21,772
We got this.
Now, let's
get into character.
287
00:13:21,768 --> 00:13:23,128
(CROWD CHEERING)
288
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:25,166
Hello, all 17 of you
289
00:13:25,172 --> 00:13:27,072
tuning into Jefferson G.
County School TV,
290
00:13:27,073 --> 00:13:30,183
and welcome to today's
speech and debate event.
291
00:13:30,177 --> 00:13:32,307
Joining me
is my fellow judge Mr. Drako.
292
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:34,652
Good evening,
debate-wrestling fans.
293
00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:36,308
And our guest host
for this evening,
294
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:37,976
Coach Nolan Mitchell.
295
00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:41,194
It's Coach Cobra
Big Bowlin' Nolan,
thank you very much.
296
00:13:41,188 --> 00:13:43,988
Oh...(CHUCKLES)
the air in here
is electric.
297
00:13:43,990 --> 00:13:47,190
Coach Cobra
Big Bowlin' Nolan
is super excited
298
00:13:47,194 --> 00:13:48,594
about tonight's event.
299
00:13:48,595 --> 00:13:50,125
Okay, coach.
300
00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:52,460
For you viewers out there,
I guess it's not hard to tell
301
00:13:52,465 --> 00:13:55,165
whose idea this incredibly
expensive event was.
302
00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:57,168
Thank goodness we started
to sell ads on this channel.
303
00:13:57,838 --> 00:13:59,668
(ANNOUNCER READING)
304
00:13:59,673 --> 00:14:01,813
Extreme! You'll never sleep again!
305
00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:04,508
I'm sure there are better ways
to spend this money.
306
00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:06,111
If the vampire here
got to blow up
307
00:14:06,112 --> 00:14:07,482
the sports field
for his event,
308
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:09,980
Coach Cobra
Big Bowlin' Nolan
can have this.
309
00:14:09,983 --> 00:14:11,683
Geez, Nolan,
bring it down a bit.
310
00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:14,145
All right.
And refereeing
tonight's event
311
00:14:14,154 --> 00:14:16,824
is our own shop teacher
Mr. Menke.
(CROWD CHEERING)
312
00:14:16,823 --> 00:14:20,193
First up from Jefferson G.,
they're smart and crazy.
313
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:22,163
Put your hands together for
314
00:14:22,162 --> 00:14:25,262
Intellectual Insanity Plea.
315
00:14:27,334 --> 00:14:28,834
COACH MITCHELL: Please welcome
316
00:14:28,835 --> 00:14:31,135
the Melissanator!
(CROWD CHEERING)
317
00:14:32,973 --> 00:14:36,413
MR. DRAKO: Beware
the Zack Attack, ha-ha-ha.
(CROWD CHEERS)
318
00:14:40,213 --> 00:14:41,713
MURAWSKI: And finally,
319
00:14:41,715 --> 00:14:43,145
hmm, Milo Murphy.
320
00:14:43,149 --> 00:14:46,049
Uh-oh.
Yeah, are we
at a safe enough distance?
321
00:14:46,052 --> 00:14:48,222
Murphy!
He's planning on bringing
322
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:51,061
the awe and destruction
of Murphy's Law.
323
00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:52,687
If I was the other team,
324
00:14:52,692 --> 00:14:54,462
I'd expect pain.
325
00:14:54,461 --> 00:14:58,101
Hmm, that goes for anyone
in this building, actually.
326
00:14:58,098 --> 00:15:01,228
I, uh... Maybe this
was a bad idea.
327
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:02,074
(STARTING BELL TOLLS)
328
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:05,039
Did it just
get cold in here?
329
00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:06,398
MURAWSKI: And now,
prepare yourself
330
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:10,776
for the nightmare-fueled world
of Los Debators Gigantes.
331
00:15:10,777 --> 00:15:14,877
MR. DRAKO: Bow down
to Infinitive Splitter.
332
00:15:14,881 --> 00:15:16,281
Whoa.
333
00:15:16,283 --> 00:15:18,023
Don't let them
intimidate you,
334
00:15:18,018 --> 00:15:20,118
They're trying
to get into your heads.
335
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:21,620
(HOWLS)
(CROWD CHEERING)
336
00:15:21,621 --> 00:15:23,351
MAN: (SHOUTING)
Oh my goodness, what?
337
00:15:23,356 --> 00:15:24,516
Too late,
they're in.
338
00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:26,024
They're in.
339
00:15:26,026 --> 00:15:28,456
MURAWSKI: Back from the grave,
to carry you off to yours,
340
00:15:28,461 --> 00:15:30,231
The Retorter.
341
00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:31,300
(CHEERING)
342
00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:35,872
MR. DRAKO: And finally,
there is no mercy from
343
00:15:35,869 --> 00:15:38,699
La Locutora.
344
00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:41,913
Hi, nice to see you guys again
345
00:15:41,908 --> 00:15:43,108
I really love
your outfit.
346
00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:44,579
You're going down, Murphy.
347
00:15:44,577 --> 00:15:46,437
I'm not really sure
how this all works.
348
00:15:46,947 --> 00:15:48,547
Stop being so nice.
349
00:15:48,548 --> 00:15:49,778
(OPENING BELL RINGS)
(CROWD CHEERING)
350
00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:51,153
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
351
00:15:51,151 --> 00:15:53,551
MR. DRAKO:
First debate, "Front lawns,
352
00:15:53,553 --> 00:15:55,153
"Right or reckless?"
353
00:15:55,155 --> 00:15:58,655
Infinitive Splitter,
you have the pro argument.
354
00:15:58,658 --> 00:15:59,718
(CLANGS)
355
00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:04,897
A well-manicured lawn
can increase kerb appeal
and property values,
356
00:16:04,898 --> 00:16:07,398
which contribute
to a healthy local economy.
357
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:08,470
Oh!
(CHEERING)
358
00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:10,998
He opens
with a verbal clothesline.
359
00:16:11,004 --> 00:16:13,344
A lawn converted
into a front vegetable garden
360
00:16:13,340 --> 00:16:14,940
could provide food
for your family and friends
361
00:16:14,941 --> 00:16:16,611
and there is
no greater value than that.
362
00:16:16,609 --> 00:16:18,239
Boom!
(CHEERING)
363
00:16:18,244 --> 00:16:19,884
Suplex to the brain!
364
00:16:20,513 --> 00:16:22,183
ZACK AND MILO: Yeah!
365
00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:25,617
Okay, debate number two,
366
00:16:25,618 --> 00:16:28,318
"Boy bands,
blessing or blight?"
367
00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:29,521
Seriously?
(FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING)
368
00:16:29,990 --> 00:16:31,220
Oh no.
369
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:35,789
Coach Grab-Big-Bowl-o-Nolan
knows that music.
¶ Murray...
370
00:16:35,795 --> 00:16:38,025
It's Murray the Middleman,
¶ ...the Middleman.
371
00:16:38,031 --> 00:16:39,931
the Middletown School mascot.
(CROWD BOOING)
372
00:16:39,933 --> 00:16:42,103
He buys product
from wholesalers
¶ Murray the Middleman
373
00:16:42,102 --> 00:16:45,102
and then sells them
to retailers at a hefty price.
374
00:16:45,105 --> 00:16:46,635
What's he doing here?
Who knows?
375
00:16:46,639 --> 00:16:48,869
Back to round two,
"Boy bands."
376
00:16:48,875 --> 00:16:51,675
The Retorter will kick us off.
377
00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:53,508
Boy bands are a joke,
378
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:55,383
the kids have
no real talent.
379
00:16:55,382 --> 00:16:58,182
The Retorter
is raising them
over his mental hand.
380
00:16:58,184 --> 00:17:00,494
The songs
are paper-thin, radio-bait
381
00:17:00,487 --> 00:17:01,787
and like losers...
382
00:17:01,788 --> 00:17:03,318
Could it be?
383
00:17:03,323 --> 00:17:05,393
They always peak early.
384
00:17:05,392 --> 00:17:06,862
Yes!
(CROWD CHEERING)
385
00:17:06,860 --> 00:17:10,400
The zombie
lands the power slam!
Ouch.
386
00:17:10,397 --> 00:17:12,457
Well, the joke's
on you, Retorter,
387
00:17:12,465 --> 00:17:15,195
boy bands
are a great proving ground
for young talent,
388
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:18,801
plus their images
have improved
teen magazine sales by 23%,
389
00:17:18,805 --> 00:17:21,165
thus stimulating
the national economy.
390
00:17:21,174 --> 00:17:24,414
And Zack Attack
has landed a stunner
on that zombie,
391
00:17:24,411 --> 00:17:26,511
and this crowd
is eating it up.
392
00:17:26,513 --> 00:17:29,413
Wait! What is
Murray the Middleman up to?
393
00:17:29,416 --> 00:17:30,746
Murray's distracting the ref
394
00:17:30,750 --> 00:17:33,120
with a sale
of referee jerseys.
395
00:17:33,820 --> 00:17:35,420
(CROWD GROANS)
396
00:17:36,923 --> 00:17:38,323
(WHISTLE BLOWS)
Out of bounds.
397
00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:40,215
MR. DRAKO: Five points.
398
00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:41,426
What!
399
00:17:41,428 --> 00:17:44,598
Coach Cobra Big Bowlin' Nolan
doesn't like this one bit.
400
00:17:44,597 --> 00:17:47,297
How could Murray the Middleman
get away with it?
401
00:17:48,902 --> 00:17:50,602
Where did that come from?
Is it...
402
00:17:50,603 --> 00:17:51,873
Yes!
403
00:17:51,871 --> 00:17:55,411
The Janitor
is in the house!
404
00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:56,508
Ha!
(CROWD CHEERING)
405
00:17:56,509 --> 00:17:59,209
How are those profits
looking now, Middleman?
406
00:17:59,212 --> 00:18:00,312
Drako, trade seats with me.
407
00:18:00,313 --> 00:18:02,213
Sorry about that, guys.
408
00:18:02,215 --> 00:18:04,445
It's all right, Zack,
we have several rounds to go.
409
00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:06,921
(ENERGETIC MUSIC PLAYING)
410
00:18:09,689 --> 00:18:12,119
MAN:
¶ You've done your best to prepare for this
411
00:18:12,125 --> 00:18:15,185
¶ You were training like a man possessed
412
00:18:15,195 --> 00:18:17,525
¶ You've been worn down, dragged down
413
00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:19,700
¶ Poked, prodded, pushed and pressed.
414
00:18:21,267 --> 00:18:24,367
¶ The training regimen is quite confusing
415
00:18:24,370 --> 00:18:27,370
¶ It sets your brain and body back to using
416
00:18:27,373 --> 00:18:29,373
¶ You put your battle-strength
417
00:18:29,374 --> 00:18:31,374
¶ And arguments and reasoning to the test
418
00:18:33,413 --> 00:18:35,613
¶ It's a proven test of dying will
419
00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:41,315
¶ It's just a bunch of unrelated skills you're utilizing
420
00:18:42,489 --> 00:18:45,259
¶ The future debating is death and destruction
421
00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:48,328
¶ Across town to start a debate
422
00:18:48,328 --> 00:18:50,388
¶ Defend your argument
423
00:18:51,498 --> 00:18:53,328
¶ Defend your argument
424
00:18:54,334 --> 00:18:57,404
¶ Defend your argument!
425
00:18:57,403 --> 00:19:00,143
¶ So if you wanna take home the prize
426
00:19:00,140 --> 00:19:01,910
¶ Defend your argument ¶
427
00:19:01,908 --> 00:19:03,038
(CLANGS)
428
00:19:03,776 --> 00:19:05,076
MELISSA: It's the last round.
429
00:19:05,745 --> 00:19:07,505
Now it's up
to you, Milo.
430
00:19:07,514 --> 00:19:08,954
Our final topic today,
431
00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:12,448
"Winning awards
or participation trophies?"
432
00:19:12,452 --> 00:19:14,652
Los Debators Gigantes
won the coin toss,
433
00:19:14,654 --> 00:19:16,354
and has selected "winning."
434
00:19:16,356 --> 00:19:17,956
THE RETORTER:
We're all about winning!
435
00:19:17,957 --> 00:19:20,527
You are definitely
going down, Jefferson.
436
00:19:20,527 --> 00:19:21,427
(GULPS)
437
00:19:21,427 --> 00:19:24,327
And this last showdown
for the win
438
00:19:24,330 --> 00:19:28,470
will be a cage match!
439
00:19:28,468 --> 00:19:29,698
(CROWD CHEERING)
440
00:19:29,702 --> 00:19:31,842
Ooh, this is so cool.
441
00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:32,938
Ugh.
442
00:19:32,939 --> 00:19:34,369
Wait, Milo.
443
00:19:34,374 --> 00:19:35,844
The fact that you
even agreed to do this
444
00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:38,542
and all the crazy events
we've been through together
tonight,
445
00:19:38,545 --> 00:19:40,505
has made me see
that the win
isn't what's important.
446
00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:42,683
This. This is important.
447
00:19:42,682 --> 00:19:45,422
Being in a cage match
with those crazy
Middletown kids?
448
00:19:45,418 --> 00:19:47,318
No, spending time
with my friends.
449
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:48,450
Ow, thanks.
450
00:19:48,454 --> 00:19:49,654
Thank's, Melissa.
451
00:19:49,656 --> 00:19:51,386
(CAGE MECHANISM CRANKING)
452
00:19:51,391 --> 00:19:54,491
MR. DRAKO:
Los Debators Gigantes,
you're up first.
453
00:19:54,494 --> 00:19:55,564
Begin.
454
00:19:55,562 --> 00:19:57,232
Winning is everything.
455
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:59,960
Without a winner,
how can there be goals
for students to strive for?
456
00:19:59,966 --> 00:20:02,526
Participation trophies
only encourage mediocrity.
457
00:20:03,303 --> 00:20:04,743
Vicious intellectual
piledriver.
458
00:20:04,737 --> 00:20:06,497
She mentally
climbed that cage
459
00:20:06,506 --> 00:20:10,206
and brought down
her full fury
on Murphy's brain.
460
00:20:10,210 --> 00:20:11,680
Can he recover?
461
00:20:11,678 --> 00:20:13,508
Oh, for crying out loud.
462
00:20:13,513 --> 00:20:16,383
And now Milo will make
his final argument.
463
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:18,082
I would like to start off
464
00:20:18,084 --> 00:20:19,924
by saying what a good job
you and your team
have done tonight.
465
00:20:19,919 --> 00:20:21,819
What?
Murphy is staggering
466
00:20:21,821 --> 00:20:24,761
to his mental feet,
but clearly he's
still stunned.
467
00:20:24,757 --> 00:20:27,257
Participating
with your friends
is what's important,
468
00:20:27,260 --> 00:20:28,360
not winning.
469
00:20:28,361 --> 00:20:30,601
I'm just glad
I had the opportunity to try.
470
00:20:30,597 --> 00:20:31,757
Oh, my word!
(CROWD GASPS)
471
00:20:31,764 --> 00:20:33,764
Murray the Middleman
was hiding under the ring!
472
00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:35,666
He's in the cage
and attacking the ref!
473
00:20:35,668 --> 00:20:37,068
What can anyone do?
474
00:20:37,070 --> 00:20:38,700
Every time you have to
label someone a winner,
475
00:20:38,705 --> 00:20:40,065
you're labeling
the rest losers,
476
00:20:40,073 --> 00:20:41,573
and no one here today
is a loser.
477
00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:43,114
Except you guys, Murphy.
478
00:20:43,109 --> 00:20:44,209
COACH MITCHELL:
It's The Janitor,
479
00:20:44,210 --> 00:20:45,440
and he's got the key
to the cage!
480
00:20:45,445 --> 00:20:47,175
Oh, thank goodness!
481
00:20:47,180 --> 00:20:49,380
Just by participating,
I've already won.
482
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:50,512
If I had my way,
483
00:20:50,516 --> 00:20:51,676
everyone here
in this gym tonight
484
00:20:51,684 --> 00:20:53,184
would get
a participation award.
485
00:20:53,186 --> 00:20:55,146
COACH MITCHELL: Oh, Middleman!
486
00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:56,748
MILO: In fact,
487
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:59,886
I'd be fine forfeiting
so you can have the win.
488
00:20:59,892 --> 00:21:01,132
You're gonna forfeit?
489
00:21:01,127 --> 00:21:02,727
Oh no, you don't
get to be the better man,
490
00:21:02,729 --> 00:21:04,299
I'm twice as good as you.
491
00:21:04,297 --> 00:21:06,097
I'm forfeiting twice as hard.
492
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:08,630
(BLOWS WHISTLE)
493
00:21:08,635 --> 00:21:11,635
MR. DRAKO: Murphy's done it!
Jefferson wins!
494
00:21:11,638 --> 00:21:13,598
Jefferson wins!
495
00:21:14,407 --> 00:21:15,807
This slipped
into utter nonsense,
496
00:21:15,808 --> 00:21:17,438
I'm not even sure
what I'm still doing here.
497
00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:18,843
(GRUNTING)
498
00:21:20,380 --> 00:21:22,710
Bill, Stan, this was
a lot of fun tonight.
499
00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:24,775
Thanks for doing this.
Hey, no problem.
500
00:21:25,485 --> 00:21:26,875
The superintendent!
501
00:21:26,886 --> 00:21:28,386
Another wrestler?
No,
502
00:21:28,388 --> 00:21:30,218
that's the school's
actual superintendent.
503
00:21:30,223 --> 00:21:31,593
None of this
was approved.
504
00:21:31,591 --> 00:21:32,761
We might be
in a lot of trouble here.
505
00:21:32,759 --> 00:21:34,829
¶ It's my world and we're all livin' in it ¶
506
00:21:36,262 --> 00:21:38,302
¶ Go, Milo Go, Milo, go
507
00:21:38,298 --> 00:21:40,928
¶ Oh, thanks, everybody That is so motivational
508
00:21:40,933 --> 00:21:43,973
¶ Go, Milo Go, Milo, go
509
00:21:46,406 --> 00:21:48,636
¶ Whoa
510
00:21:48,641 --> 00:21:51,981
¶ Whoa ¶ I'm not sitting here watching the world turn
511
00:21:51,978 --> 00:21:53,608
¶ You know I'd rather spin it
512
00:21:53,613 --> 00:21:56,013
¶ Go, Milo Go, Milo, go
513
00:21:56,015 --> 00:21:58,515
¶ It's my world and we're all livin' in it ¶
37704
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