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1
00:00:10,007 --> 00:00:10,017
HEY, LIONEL.
2
00:00:10,022 --> 00:00:11,012
WHAT?
3
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:12,011
WANT SOMETHING COOL?
4
00:00:12,011 --> 00:00:14,011
I CAN MAKE A COOCHIE COME OUT OF
YOUR HAND.
5
00:00:14,009 --> 00:00:14,019
HOW?
6
00:00:14,021 --> 00:00:16,021
GO LIKE THIS, BRO.
7
00:00:16,018 --> 00:00:17,018
COME HERE.
8
00:00:17,019 --> 00:00:18,019
LIKE THIS?
9
00:00:18,023 --> 00:00:21,013
NO, THIS WAY, MAN.
10
00:00:21,011 --> 00:00:23,011
NOW OPEN AND LOOK AT IT.
11
00:00:23,011 --> 00:00:26,001
HOLY SHIT
THAT'S TIGHT.
12
00:00:26,002 --> 00:00:28,012
I'M A NASTY NIGGA
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
13
00:00:28,014 --> 00:00:29,014
YOU DO IT.
14
00:00:29,011 --> 00:00:30,011
CHECK IT OUT.
15
00:00:30,008 --> 00:00:31,008
WHAT'S IN HERE?
16
00:00:31,008 --> 00:00:34,018
OH! WHAT THE FUCK
AAH!
17
00:00:34,019 --> 00:00:37,999
[ SOBS ]
I DON'T HAVE ANY -- THESE ARE
18
00:00:38,003 --> 00:00:38,023
MY GOOD SHORTS.
19
00:00:38,019 --> 00:00:40,009
IT'S IN MY MOUTH.
20
00:00:40,014 --> 00:00:42,024
[ ROARS ]
21
00:00:46,008 --> 00:00:48,018
♪ I LIKE CHEESE
♪ I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I
22
00:00:48,023 --> 00:00:51,013
♪ LI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-KE
23
00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:54,019
♪ CHEESE
CHEESE! CHEESE! CHEESE!
24
00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:56,000
AGHHHHHHHHH! AGHHHHHHHHH!
25
00:00:56,004 --> 00:00:57,004
LOITER SQUAD.
26
00:00:57,002 --> 00:00:58,022
AGHHHHHHHHH!
27
00:00:58,021 --> 00:01:01,011
WHO'D YOU HEAR'S COMING OUT
HERE TODAY?
28
00:01:01,010 --> 00:01:02,010
OH, SERENA WILLIAMS.
29
00:01:02,009 --> 00:01:02,019
OH, YEAH?
30
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:04,000
YEAH.
31
00:01:04,003 --> 00:01:05,013
I'M SABRINA WILLIAMS.
32
00:01:05,016 --> 00:01:07,006
THAT'S MARS, MY SISTER.
33
00:01:07,016 --> 00:01:08,996
WE'RE AT THIS TENNIS COURT.
34
00:01:09,003 --> 00:01:11,013
LET'S GO PLAY TENNIS 'CAUSE I'M
A CRAZY BITCH.
35
00:01:11,015 --> 00:01:14,015
REMEMBER AT THAT U.S. OPEN WHEN
I LET THAT FRENCH NIGGA OPEN
36
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:17,010
MY PUSSY
THAT'S WHAT I'M ABOUT TO DO.
37
00:01:17,008 --> 00:01:18,018
WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?
38
00:01:18,020 --> 00:01:22,010
[ LAUGHTER ]
YOU TOOK OFF WORK TODAY TO BE
39
00:01:22,008 --> 00:01:22,018
HERE?
40
00:01:22,017 --> 00:01:23,007
WELL, YEAH.
41
00:01:23,008 --> 00:01:24,008
LIKE, A PRETTY BIG DEAL.
42
00:01:24,010 --> 00:01:26,010
I DIDN'T VOLUNTEER IN MY
DAUGHTER'S CLASS TODAY.
43
00:01:26,016 --> 00:01:27,016
Y'ALL WANT SOME AUTOGRAPHS?
44
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:28,020
I KNOW YOU DO.
45
00:01:28,020 --> 00:01:30,010
[ LAUGHTER ]
WE FROM COMPTON.
46
00:01:30,009 --> 00:01:30,999
YOU ARE?
47
00:01:31,002 --> 00:01:32,002
WE'RE FROM THE HOOD.
48
00:01:32,005 --> 00:01:33,005
YOU NEED TO GO BACK.
49
00:01:33,010 --> 00:01:34,010
GOODBYE.
50
00:01:34,008 --> 00:01:36,008
[ LAUGHTER ]
YOU GO BACK TO COMPTON WITH
51
00:01:36,009 --> 00:01:38,009
YOUR FAKE WEAVE.
52
00:01:38,010 --> 00:01:40,010
[ GRUNTS ]
[ GRUNTS ]
53
00:01:40,014 --> 00:01:42,004
I BEAT THIS BITCH A LOT.
54
00:01:42,005 --> 00:01:42,015
NO.
55
00:01:42,022 --> 00:01:44,002
I BEAT THIS BITCH ALL THE TIME.
56
00:01:44,005 --> 00:01:47,995
SHE AIN'T SHIT
YO, YOU...
57
00:01:48,002 --> 00:01:51,012
[ LAUGHTER ]
WE ARE VERY CALM PEOPLE.
58
00:01:51,010 --> 00:01:54,000
THIS IT BULLSHIT
EAT MY PUSSY
59
00:01:54,004 --> 00:01:55,024
HAS YOUR TEMPER EVER GOTTEN
OUT OF YOUR CONTROL?
60
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,000
HAS YOUR TEMPER EVER GOT OUT
OF YOUR CONTROL?
61
00:01:58,005 --> 00:01:59,015
DOES IT LOOK LIKE WE HAVE
TEMPERS?
62
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:00,010
NO.
63
00:02:00,011 --> 00:02:01,011
I GOT NO TEMPER.
64
00:02:01,008 --> 00:02:03,018
[ SHOUTS ]
TELL HER. TELL THAT BITCH.
65
00:02:03,017 --> 00:02:06,997
ONLY WHEN I'M ON MY PERIOD
AND THERE'S BLOOD COMING OUT OF
66
00:02:07,002 --> 00:02:11,022
MY PUSSY I MAY GET A LITTLE
MAD.
67
00:02:11,021 --> 00:02:14,021
[ SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY ]
YOU REMEMBER THAT PARTY WE
68
00:02:14,021 --> 00:02:16,001
THREW FOR QUEEN LATIFAH?
69
00:02:16,006 --> 00:02:17,996
I WAS DRUNK OFF THEM MIMOSAS.
70
00:02:18,005 --> 00:02:18,015
HEY.
71
00:02:18,022 --> 00:02:20,012
AND THEM MARGARITAS.
72
00:02:20,011 --> 00:02:22,001
I WAS SHAKING MY BLACK ASS.
73
00:02:22,006 --> 00:02:22,016
UH-OH.
74
00:02:22,022 --> 00:02:23,022
ON YOUR PERIOD?
75
00:02:23,022 --> 00:02:24,012
YEAH.
76
00:02:24,014 --> 00:02:25,024
I'LL GET HELP.
77
00:02:25,018 --> 00:02:27,018
[ GROANING ]
[ MOANING ]
78
00:02:37,015 --> 00:02:42,995
[ COUGHING ]
NO.
79
00:02:43,006 --> 00:02:44,006
NO!
80
00:02:44,010 --> 00:02:48,010
[ GAGGING ]
FUCK YOU GUYS
81
00:02:48,015 --> 00:02:53,005
NO FINGERPRINTS, NO SECURITY
CAMERAS, NOTHING.
82
00:02:53,010 --> 00:02:54,020
IT'S...
83
00:02:54,018 --> 00:02:55,008
DAMN.
84
00:02:55,011 --> 00:02:57,011
WE'RE NEVER GONNA SOLVE THIS
ONE.
85
00:02:57,007 --> 00:03:00,017
LET'S PACK THIS SHIT UP.
86
00:03:00,022 --> 00:03:06,012
OH SHIT
HMM, SO, IT LOOKS LIKE WE
87
00:03:06,011 --> 00:03:15,021
HAVE OURSELVES A DEAD BODY AND
NOBODY KNOWS WHY.
88
00:03:15,018 --> 00:03:17,008
SO, IS THE BITCH DEAD?
89
00:03:17,007 --> 00:03:18,017
THE BITCH IS DEAD.
90
00:03:18,018 --> 00:03:19,998
LOOK.
91
00:03:20,002 --> 00:03:23,002
ORANGE JUICE.
92
00:03:23,004 --> 00:03:25,014
JUST SQUEEZED.
93
00:03:25,007 --> 00:03:27,017
GOD DAMN IT, HE'S GOOD.
94
00:03:27,023 --> 00:03:31,013
DAMN RIGHT.
95
00:03:31,016 --> 00:03:35,016
YEAH, IT'S A CLEAR-CUT CASE
OF MURDERCIDE.
96
00:03:35,020 --> 00:03:39,020
HOW THE FUCK DID YOU DO
THAT?
97
00:03:39,019 --> 00:03:41,999
WHAT'S HE GONNA DO NEXT?
98
00:03:42,004 --> 00:03:43,014
I DON'T KNOW.
99
00:03:43,016 --> 00:03:45,996
THIS IS WILD.
100
00:03:46,004 --> 00:03:47,014
WHY DIDN'T WE THINK OF THIS?
101
00:04:01,019 --> 00:04:04,999
[ GUNSHOT ]
LOOKS LIKE WE'VE FOUND OUR
102
00:04:05,004 --> 00:04:07,024
PEANUT-BUTTER
ORANGE-JUICE-SQUEEZE KILLER.
103
00:04:08,001 --> 00:04:10,021
[ GASPS ]
IT'S HER?
104
00:04:10,020 --> 00:04:12,020
YES. ARREST HER.
105
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:13,020
OH.
106
00:04:14,001 --> 00:04:15,011
GET HER.
107
00:04:15,009 --> 00:04:19,009
BEFORE YOU GO, CAN I ASK YOU TWO
QUESTIONS, MIKE G.?
108
00:04:19,014 --> 00:04:20,024
WELL, THAT'S ONE.
109
00:04:20,021 --> 00:04:22,021
HOW DID YOU DO IT?
110
00:04:22,020 --> 00:04:24,020
IT'S SIMPLE.
111
00:04:24,020 --> 00:04:27,010
WHEN I GOT HERE, I NOTICED THE
ORANGE JUICE WAS ON THE RIGHT
112
00:04:27,009 --> 00:04:29,019
SIDE OF THE TABLE, WHICH LED ME
TO BELIEVE THAT THIS BITCH IS
113
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:32,000
LEFT-HANDED.
114
00:04:32,005 --> 00:04:35,995
SINCE TOMORROW IS THURSDAY AND
SCHOOL BUSES ARE YELLOW, I KNEW
115
00:04:36,004 --> 00:04:38,014
I HAD TO MAKE A SANDWICH.
116
00:04:38,014 --> 00:04:42,004
THEN I SCREAMED THE NUMBER FOUR
SILENTLY IN MY HEAD FOR AN HOUR
117
00:04:42,003 --> 00:04:44,003
AND THAT'S WHEN SHIT GOT
REAL.
118
00:04:44,006 --> 00:04:46,996
SINCE BIRDS ARE AFRAID OF ASIAN
PEOPLE...
119
00:04:47,004 --> 00:04:49,024
[ BIRD SCREECHES ]
...THE LADY GOT KILLED WHEN SHE
120
00:04:49,020 --> 00:04:52,000
MURDERED HERSELF, OBVIOUSLY.
121
00:04:58,009 --> 00:05:00,999
HEY, THIS IS A MIKE G.S.I.
122
00:05:01,003 --> 00:05:02,013
RESPONSE.
123
00:05:02,008 --> 00:05:05,018
UM, IF YOU'RE WATCHING THIS,
MIKE G., YOU FUCKING SUCK AND I
124
00:05:05,021 --> 00:05:06,021
HATE YOU.
125
00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,020
YOU'RE NOT EVEN, LIKE, A COOL
DARK.
126
00:05:08,018 --> 00:05:09,018
YOU'RE, LIKE, A ASHY DARK.
127
00:05:09,022 --> 00:05:11,012
[ MOUSE CLICKS ]
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
128
00:05:32,006 --> 00:05:33,006
BAGEL'S TRYING TO DRIVE.
129
00:05:40,015 --> 00:05:42,015
[ INHALES SHARPLY ]
BICEP.
130
00:05:42,022 --> 00:05:44,022
YOU SEE THAT? YOU SEE THAT?
131
00:05:44,019 --> 00:05:47,019
YES.
132
00:05:47,023 --> 00:05:52,013
AZTEC WARRIOR -- A FIERCE,
HIGHLY TRAINED SOLDIER FROM DAY
133
00:05:52,011 --> 00:05:55,011
ONE, BORN INTO A SOCIETY DRIVEN
BY WARFARE.
134
00:05:55,016 --> 00:05:58,996
THE AZTEC WARRIOR IS TO BE
FEARED BY ALL.
135
00:05:59,003 --> 00:06:02,023
A BLOOD -- BORN ON THE STREETS,
DOING ANYTHING TO MAKE THAT
136
00:06:02,022 --> 00:06:04,002
MONEY.
137
00:06:04,003 --> 00:06:07,013
SLINGING ROCK, AMERICAN PUNKS,
AND FORNICATING ALL IN A DAY'S
138
00:06:07,015 --> 00:06:08,005
WORK.
139
00:06:08,011 --> 00:06:10,011
YOU'D BETTER WATCH YOUR BACK.
140
00:06:10,015 --> 00:06:15,005
THE AZTEC WARRIOR WEARS THE
SKINS OF SLAIN JAGUARS, TRIBAL
141
00:06:15,010 --> 00:06:19,010
TATTOOS, AND OTHER FIERCE
ACCESSORIES MADE TO INTIMIDATE.
142
00:06:19,016 --> 00:06:24,016
EQUIPPED WITH A LARGE BLADE,
WOODEN CLUB, BARBED SPEAR, AND
143
00:06:25,001 --> 00:06:27,021
HIS BODY IS COVERED WITH ARMOR.
144
00:06:28,001 --> 00:06:32,021
THE BLOOD WEARS A RED FLANNEL,
RED BANDANA, AND ALSO HAS
145
00:06:32,017 --> 00:06:36,007
VARIOUS MARKINGS AND TATTOOS,
SUCH AS A FIVE-POINTED STAR AND
146
00:06:36,010 --> 00:06:39,010
A DOG'S PAW BURNED INTO THE ARM
WITH A CIGARETTE.
147
00:06:39,011 --> 00:06:43,021
HE'S EQUIPPED WITH A HANDGUN,
STEAK KNIFE, AND A FEW HOMIES.
148
00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:47,000
WHO IS DEADLIEST?
149
00:06:47,004 --> 00:06:50,014
THE AZTEC WARRIOR IS AT A
DISADVANTAGE NOT BEING ABLE TO
150
00:06:50,016 --> 00:06:54,016
HIDE OR CAMOUFLAGE HIMSELF IN
HIS OWN FAMILIAR SURROUNDINGS.
151
00:06:54,017 --> 00:06:57,017
BUT WITH ALL HIS TRAINING AND
KNOWLEDGE OF WAR, WILL HE BE
152
00:06:57,020 --> 00:06:58,010
ABLE?
153
00:06:58,009 --> 00:06:59,019
WHAT'S UP, BRO?
154
00:06:59,018 --> 00:07:06,998
[ GUNSHOTS ]
UH, NO.
155
00:07:07,006 --> 00:07:11,006
THE AZTEC WARRIOR PROVED NOT TO
BE FIT ENOUGH AND NO MATCH FOR
156
00:07:11,016 --> 00:07:13,016
THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR.
157
00:07:17,017 --> 00:07:18,017
LOOK AT THAT.
158
00:07:18,017 --> 00:07:20,997
DO YOU EVER SEEN SOMEBODY MAKE A
FISH BOWL?
159
00:07:21,002 --> 00:07:24,002
I DON'T THINK YOU HAVE.
160
00:07:24,004 --> 00:07:26,014
WHOO!
161
00:07:27,016 --> 00:07:28,016
MY MAN!
162
00:07:28,018 --> 00:07:29,018
THEY DON'T WANT IT WITH ME.
163
00:07:29,021 --> 00:07:34,011
I AM THAT NIGGA
♪ MY LITTLE SECRET
164
00:07:34,013 --> 00:07:38,013
♪ NO ONE NEEDS TO KNOW
♪ MY LITTLE SECRET
165
00:07:38,008 --> 00:07:42,008
♪ DOESN'T HAVE TO SHOW
♪ MY LITTLE SECRET IS
166
00:07:42,014 --> 00:07:51,024
I'M ON MY FLOW ♪
167
00:07:51,018 --> 00:08:00,998
♪ NO PEEKING CAUSES NO LEAKING
♪ I'VE GOT MY GIANT TAMPON ON
168
00:08:01,005 --> 00:08:04,995
ALL GIANT TAMPONS CAN HELP
YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE ON AND OFF
169
00:08:05,003 --> 00:08:06,003
THE COURT.
170
00:08:06,006 --> 00:08:09,016
MADE OUT OF TITANIUM AND
GLAUCOMA CAN HELP YOU DURING THE
171
00:08:09,018 --> 00:08:14,008
DAY SO YOU DON'T HAVE...COMING
OUT OF YOU.
172
00:08:14,009 --> 00:08:17,999
♪ MY LITTLE SECRET DOESN'T
HAVE TO SHOW ♪
173
00:08:18,002 --> 00:08:21,022
♪ MY LITTLE SECRET THAT I'M ON
MY FLOW ♪
174
00:08:21,020 --> 00:08:26,000
♪ MY LITTLE SECRET
♪ NOW YOU ALL KNOW
175
00:08:26,002 --> 00:08:26,022
HEY.
176
00:08:26,018 --> 00:08:28,018
BITCH, I'M DRUNK, BITCH.
177
00:08:29,015 --> 00:08:31,005
I WANT TO -- I'M STILL TRYING
TO FIGURE OUT WHAT I CALLED THAT
178
00:08:31,015 --> 00:08:33,005
GIRL, MY GIRLFRIEND THAT WAS
HALF-BLACK, HALF-JAPANESE AND
179
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,022
THE COOLEST --
PROBABLY KIM CHAN.
180
00:08:34,019 --> 00:08:36,019
NO, IT WAS LIKE --
NO, LIKE, IT WAS LIKE --
181
00:08:36,023 --> 00:08:37,023
BITCH!
182
00:08:37,023 --> 00:08:41,003
IT'S PROBABLY --
[ GRUNTS ]
183
00:08:41,003 --> 00:08:46,013
[ SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY ]
LIONEL! LIONEL!
184
00:08:46,015 --> 00:08:48,015
AAH!
185
00:08:48,019 --> 00:08:53,019
[ SHOUTING ]
THIS SHIT IT SUCKS.
186
00:08:53,019 --> 00:09:03,019
[ LAUGHS ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
187
00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:13,020
[ LAUGHS ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
188
00:09:13,019 --> 00:09:16,019
[ SIGHS ]
ALL RIGHT.
189
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:18,010
WHERE ALL THE BLACK PEOPLE
GO?
190
00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:27,016
[ LAUGHTER ]
COME ON. LET'S DO THIS.
191
00:09:27,020 --> 00:09:31,010
[ THUD ]
AHH!
192
00:09:31,015 --> 00:09:35,005
[ CATS MEOWING ]
AND THEN, I LOOKED TO MY
193
00:09:35,007 --> 00:09:36,007
LEFT.
194
00:09:36,007 --> 00:09:38,007
"WHY IS THIS BITCH GETTING
JUMPED BY SIX NIGGAS"
195
00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:39,011
WHAT?
196
00:09:39,016 --> 00:09:40,996
I GOT IT, FELLAS.
197
00:09:41,003 --> 00:09:45,013
OH SHIT, MY NIGGA
MAN, OPEN THAT SHIT MAN.
198
00:09:45,016 --> 00:09:46,996
OH!
199
00:09:47,006 --> 00:09:47,016
HELL YEAH.
200
00:09:50,002 --> 00:09:51,002
HEY, YOU NEED ONE OF THESE.
201
00:09:51,005 --> 00:09:51,015
HELL, YEAH.
202
00:09:51,021 --> 00:09:52,011
OH!
203
00:09:52,011 --> 00:09:53,021
HEY, HE'S CHARGED UP.
204
00:09:54,001 --> 00:09:55,011
HE'S CHARGED UP.
205
00:09:55,012 --> 00:09:58,012
OH SHIT
YOU OKAY?
206
00:09:58,013 --> 00:10:02,003
TOO MUCH PURPLE POW?
207
00:10:02,004 --> 00:10:03,024
MY NIGGA
OH, NO.
208
00:10:03,023 --> 00:10:05,013
YOU SEEING WHAT I'M SEEING?
209
00:10:05,013 --> 00:10:08,003
OH, NO, THEY DID.
210
00:10:08,002 --> 00:10:10,012
♪ PURPLE POW
NOW, LOOK.
211
00:10:10,013 --> 00:10:14,023
♪ PURPLE POW
♪ DRINK IT, DRINK IT, DRINK IT,
212
00:10:14,022 --> 00:10:18,012
DRINK IT ♪
YOU WANT SOME?
213
00:10:18,008 --> 00:10:20,018
♪ HE GETS ROWDY
♪ GLASS OF WATER
214
00:10:20,021 --> 00:10:22,021
♪ THAT'S A PARTY
♪ PURPLE
215
00:10:22,017 --> 00:10:24,007
OH!
216
00:10:24,008 --> 00:10:25,008
MY ASS.
217
00:10:25,016 --> 00:10:26,016
OH!
218
00:10:26,023 --> 00:10:28,023
WAIT A MINUTE.
219
00:10:28,021 --> 00:10:30,011
OH! AM I BLEEDING?
220
00:10:30,010 --> 00:10:32,010
HOLY SHIT
OH!
221
00:10:32,009 --> 00:10:33,999
DUDE, YOU DO.
222
00:10:34,002 --> 00:10:35,012
OH, LIONEL BOOTY CUT.
223
00:10:35,010 --> 00:10:36,020
[ CHUCKLES ]
WHAT DID HE DO?
224
00:10:36,018 --> 00:10:37,018
YOU MEAN, WHO DID HE DO?
225
00:10:37,017 --> 00:10:40,997
♪ PURPLE POW
UM, TACO?
226
00:10:41,002 --> 00:10:44,012
ONE, THAT'S A STUPID NAME, AND
TWO, YOU LOOK LIKE A UGLY
227
00:10:44,010 --> 00:10:45,010
ARABIAN DUDE.
228
00:10:45,009 --> 00:10:47,019
SO, LIKE, STOP TELLING PEOPLE
YOU'RE BLACK.
229
00:10:47,022 --> 00:10:49,022
ARE YOU WEARING FAKE
EYEBROWS?
230
00:10:49,018 --> 00:10:50,018
I AM NOT.
231
00:10:50,018 --> 00:10:54,018
[ LAUGHTER ]
THEY LOOK GOOD, THOUGH?
232
00:10:54,021 --> 00:10:55,011
YEAH.
233
00:10:55,010 --> 00:10:56,020
YOU FEEL ME? THANKS.
15600
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