Original subtitles

Ah-hyuck!

♪ H-h-h-hit it ♪

♪ Like father, like son ♪

♪ You're always number one ♪

[both] Yes!

♪ There's buddies There's pals ♪

Yeah!

♪ You always seem to work things out ♪

♪ Can't you see you're two of a kind ♪

♪ Lookin' for a real good time ♪

Whoa!

♪ A real good time ♪

Aah!

♪ Report to the Goof Troop ♪

♪ And we'll always stick together ♪

♪ Always stick together ♪

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ The best of friends forever ♪

♪ Side by side wherever we go ♪

♪ We're always ready to roll ♪

♪ Now gimme a beat ♪

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ And we always stick together ♪

Gawrsh!

♪ We're the Goof Troop ♪

♪ The best of friends forever ♪

♪ Now we're calling everyone ♪

♪ Come along and join the fun ♪

♪ Report to the Goof Troop ♪

♪ Baa ba doo da bop baa ba doo bop ♪

Yeah!

Well, with this dish of a satellite,

I'll be picking up football from every time zone--

At least I would if that goof wasn't slower

than a snail stuck in frozen molasses.

What are you waiting for, Christmas?

[Goofy] No. I'll be done by labor day, though!

Lemme see, insert bolt "Y" in socket "C,"

through washer "G," under rivet "F,"

over brackets "Q," "R", "S" and "T."

Hmm. Didn't know this was gonna require

a working knowledge of the alphabet.

[creaking]

Say, Petey, could ya bring up

that 7/16 double-toothed whatchamacallit?

Come get it yourself!

[Goofy grunts] Would if I could, but I can't.

Goldbrickin',

and me payin' good money, too.

That yuckin', half-steppin' dipstick,

if he thinks he's gettin' the full buck 50, he's nuts.

Makin' me climb all the way up... here.

Whoa...

Whoa!

Whaa-ha-ha-hoo!

Whoa!

Do somethin', ya goof.

Hang on, Petey. Whoa!

Don't let go, Goofer.

[both] Whoa!

[crash]

Pete, what have you been up to?

About 50,000 feet.

Daddy, you look all green and icky like something in back of the 'fridgerator.

Try my strawberry sludge lollipop.

It'll make ya feel better.

Look, ya goofin' goofball,

ya almost got me killed!

Ooh, mama-roonie.

A cherry pink '62 Thunderhead

LeGrande Del Bravo.

Cute car.

Cute? Teddy bears are cute.

That car is the stuff that dreams are made of,

not that I could afford her in a million years.

Mommy, you should buy that car for daddy and make him feel better.

I wish I could, honey. He'd love it, wouldn't he?

She's a beaut, all righty.

On a scale of one to seven, three bein' highest,

I'd give her a 12.

You can say that again, Goof.

Uh, say what again?

[Pete] "Better business association of Spoonerville

announces the 8th annual busy bee contest.

Winner will receive a trophy

and certificate of appreciation."

Aw! They forgot to mention winning the kind of good publicity

that'll make me rich enough

to buy the car of my dreams.

Man, he's been tryin' to win that for the last eight years.

What? What? What are you two whispering about?

[nervous chuckle] Eight? Did I say eight?

I meant, uh...

Late! He means we're late, late, late.

[dog panting]

[Peg] "Now hiring--shark groomer." No, thanks.

"Great opportunity-- toxic waste recycler."

Oh, yeah, right.

Honey, don't feed poopsie your sugar shock-o cereal.

But they're enriched with one essential vitamin,

and half a nutrient,

and it is good for her, too, Mommy.

Pistol, the last time puppy had sugar,

we had to scrape her off the ceiling with a spatula.

Mommy, you already have one job,

and you say me and P.J. are a full-time job,

so why do you want three jobs?

Secret, okay?

I need money 'cause I wanna surprise daddy

with that car he wants.

But nothing here looks too promising.

I wish I could think of something.

I know. Buy me a pony, and I'll let you sell rides,

or dress daddy up like a high-diving pig,

or, I know, you can sell P.J.!

[barking and whining]

-[Peg] Poopsie! -[laughing]

Dogs, go figure.

[growling] [whimpering]

[gasps] My windows!

Window washing, that's it!

[whines]

Just call us the grime busters.

I haven't been able to see main street

since I could touch my toes.

Come on, kids, we're gonna have to use

some real elbow grease on this grease.

-[tires screech] -Hey! Can I play, too?

Join the clean team.

Don't wanna alarm ya, Peg,

but there's a real ugly, dangerous-lookin' character

-lurkin' in there. -Goofy, that's you.

[chuckles] So it is.

Ah-hyuck! Didn't recognize me without my glasses.

-But you don't wear glasses. -My point exactly.

Okay! Now, after expenses for cleaner, rags,

and cute outfits,

we made $2.78.

Not bad for the first day.

[Pete yawning]

Oh, Peg, what are ya doin' up so early?

Kiss, kiss. Can't chat, honey.

Gotta get goin'. Bye-bye.

Oh, but it's saturday, love puddle.

Our one and only day together,

with you bringin' me snacks

while I watch 16 hours of football.

No, sorry, sugar pop, got work to do.

Work? What work?

Washing windows. Yesterday we earned two whole dollars and 78 cents.

[Pete laughs]

That's enough to buy two whole goldfish

or half a bottom feeder.

[laughing]

If that's the most support you can muster, buster,

zap your own breakfast.

Oh, but, hon, I don't know how to work this thing.

Oh, it's as easy as switching the TV

to the all-sports channel.

-[bell dings] -[explosion]

Dad. Go figure.

Okay, I'm officially bored.

With all this free time,

guess I could practice my award speech.

First of all, I'd like to thank someone near and dear to our hearts--

A man whose never-say-die attitude

could be an inspiration to us all,

someone whose hard work and dedication

made this award possible...

Me. There they are.

I'll make 'em feel guilt like they never felt.

I'll say I contracted acute lonely-itis

brought on by chronic neglect.

Hurry up and shake a leg while you're at it.

It's almost on.

Come on, Pistol, we can't miss it.

You think we'll all be stars and get residual payments?

Well, pleased as petunias to see you, too.

Hurry, Dad! It's mom's commercial.

Oh, this is so exciting!

♪ So if you can't see the sky ♪

♪ Give Peg a try ♪

♪ When the pigeons got ya down ♪

♪ She's the best in town ♪

Thank you, thank you so much.

-[all laughing] -[Peg] That was great.

Oh, I get it, a little business on the side.

TV commercial, exploding breakfast,

my own wife's turnin' against me.

What are you talking about?

Jig's up, toot-sweety.

Your tryin' to steal my busy bee award.

How dare you even think that, Peter?

-If you knew the reason-- -[telephone rings]

We're not buyin' any.

[telephone rings]

I said we're not--

Ooh, why, hello, Mr. Mayor,

your highness, sir. [laughs]

You know, if it's about them safety violations,

check's in the mail, right along with a little somethin' for--

-[indistinct voice on the phone] -Huh? Uh-huh. Yes. Mm-hmm.

Oh, I see. Yeah.

And you want what now?

You got the wrong number.

Who was that, honey?

Ooh, nobody but the mayor

wantin' the one and only Peg

to wash the windows at City Hall.

Oh! Isn't this wonderful? There's so much to do.

I'll need more rags, more cleaner, more polish.

Oh, Pete, be a dear and get me

some nice scaffolding, won't you?

Forget it! I got-- [groans]

Who does she think she is, anyway?

I wear the pants in this family!

Oh, and on your way back, could you stop by the cleaners

and pick up my pants? Mwah-mwah. Love you.

So then could I interest you

in a semi-automatic front-loading backhoe?

[Pete] Does the word no have any special meanin' to ya?

Whoa!

Then how about our automatic gutter cleaner?

Look! All I want is scaffoldin' for my wife. Got that?

Hey! Your wife that window-washin' cutie

I saw last on the tube night?

Yeah, that's the one.

We hear the little woman's a front-runner

for the busy bee award.

Gonna stand by and let her steal it from ya?

This little baby's the SP 1500.

Look, Edison, what's the SP stand for?

Uh, simply fantastic. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, I knew that.

Ya got your hot air compressor with feather-touch control.

Whoa!

[Pete yells]

Whoa!

...And 200 squeegee power window scrubbers.

It's high-concept, user-friendly, top of the line.

Get the little woman the manager's special.

[chuckles] Couldn't pay the junkyard to take it off our hands.

You take this baby and walk away with the bee prize.

[both chuckle]

[man] I'm pleased as pickled peanuts

to announce Peg's appointment

as official City Hall window washer.

-[applause] -[flash bulb pops]

So how does it feel to be the man behind the woman

-behind the man? -Not so fast.

As a semi-law abidin' somewhat tax payin' citizen,

I happen to know you gotta take bids on this job.

Well, yeah, I believe you're right.

And I say I could do your windows better, quicker, cheaper.

Well, I was hoping you wouldn't lose your suspenders over this, Peter,

but if you want a fight, you got one.

And where's that scaffolding you promised me?

Right over here, dear.

[Peg] What is that?

[Pete] This is the finest window washing condiment

your money can buy.

Tried and true and tested over the ages.

Why, it was a machine just like this

that washed the windows on the pyramids.

I don't know what no-good you're up to,

but I'm gonna win that job no matter what.

Three feet up,

I-- I can handle this.

Four feet, no sweat.

Five, it's not so bad

'cept I'm gettin' a nosebleed

and I'm kind of startin' to black out.

Whew! I think this is gonna take some creative thinkin'.

[panting, straining]

[panting] When this is over, Pete's gonna eat broccoli for a year.

Now, look, goofster,

Peg's in trouble, serious trouble.

Could lose the award.

Gawrsh! We gotta do somethin' to help her out.

-Good thinkin'. -Whoa!

You start on this side of the buildin',

and maybe she'll have a fightin' chance.

Now, you got your automatic scrubbers, easy-listening CD,

ready-made ballast and eardrum swabber.

All's you gotta do is just sit back and clean those windows.

[laughing]

Don't worry about a thing.

Uh, lemme see now, listen to the windows, blast the CD,

swab the scrubber, and eat a drummette.

[male voice on the CD player] Ah, the SP 1500--

Leisurely adrift on the zephyrs of solitude,

but to keep that heavenly vessel stable,

one must master the intricacies of ballast.

Give a gentle twist.

Whaa-ha-ha-hooey!

-[cooing] -Shoo! Shoo!

Well, hey, that tickles. [laughing]

Hey, hey!

Ah-choo!

[man clears throat] Can we get back to business?

Sorry.

[male voice on the CD player] Let's try that again.

Gently turn the regulator.

Gently.

The window washer is the high-wire artist

of the industrial world,

But remember,

safety is the first order of the day.

The harness adds an extra cushion of comfort

for those courageous craftsmen.

Whaa-ha-ha-hoo!

You know, I could get seriously hurt doin' this.

Good thing I ate a light breakfast. Ah-hyuck!

[Goofy panting]

[male voice on the CD player] Let's continue, shall we?

Don't stop on my account.

[male voice on the CD player] Ah, the indispensable dispenser pump,

where would the artist of the air be without it?

Engage the mechanism

and observe the economy of form,

the precision of propulsion.

[sputtering]

[male voice on the CD player] And what true craftsman can't appreciate

the computer-automated squeegee?

Gawrsh.

Cease and desist, pegums,

or be harangued with meringue.

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

Prepare to be eclaired.

Peter!

When there's a fly in the ointment,

keep the fly away from the windows.

Pete! What do you think you're doing?

If you only knew the real reason I was working this hard...

why do you have to always compete with me all the time? I know what I'm doing.

I can wash those windows better than you can!

You've never cleaned a thing in your life!

Pete, what are you doing over there?

What's that, dear?

Can't hear ya,

too many air molecules.

-[Peg] Peter! -Uh-oh.

[Peg] Peter!

[Pete] Sweet petunia, come back!

Oh, don't worry, honey, I'll save ya!

Aah!

Hold on, poofikins.

[Peg] Peter!

[Pete] Whaa-ha-ha!

Whaa-ha-ha-hey!

Whaa-ha-ha-hooey!

Get outta my way, goofmonger.

Oops! Sorry, Petey.

That better?

[Pete screams]

Hold on, Pete.

[Goofy] Whaa-ha-ha!

[thunder crashing]

Hey, Goof, get down here

and get me down from here.

[Goofy] Whaa-ha-ha-hey!

Don't worry, Petey,

I'm the decimated driver.

[gulps] Turn, turn!

Whoa!

Hold onto your helium, Peg.

[Goofy yelling]

[gurgling]

[mumbling]

[Pete screaming]

Hey, where are you goin', Petey?

[screaming]

Good thing your not afeared of heights, huh, Petey?

[panting] That's for sure, goof. Otherwise I'd be...

[wind blowing]

Gosh.

[both screaming]

Hello, Honey Pie.

Nice shade of lipstick.

If by chance we don't die, I'm gonna kill you.

All right, all right. Now stay calm just like me.

Everybody be careful.

I can save us. I'm in pink condition,

at the pinochle of my powers.

I'm at the height of...

Of 50,000 feet.

All right, come on, you can do it, Pete, old buddy.

Just don't look down.

I gotta learn to listen to myself.

No. I'm not cavin' in.

I'm gonna do this for that ever-lovin' pumpkin-faced praline of mine.

I did it!

Now all I have to do is...

There!

[air hissing]

Oh, that was a wonderful idea, Pete,

even better had you taken into account the effects of gravity.

Oh, yeah.

[all screaming]

Oh, Peg, this is all my fault.

Ya gotta forgive me.

You're a better busy bee than I could ever be.

A thousand pardons.

A thousand? Okay, start.

-I beg your pardon. -One.

-I beg your pardon. -Two.

-I beg your pardon. -Three

[Pete] And I beg your pardon.

1,000. Whew!

You know, cough drop, I think you may have missed one.

Maybe you'd better start all over again

Just to be safe.

[sobbing] Pegums!

That trophy had your name on it from the start,

and I tried to cheat ya.

I'm pond scum, a lowly amoeba,

a vinegar stain on the fabric of life.

I know you are, dear. You missed a spot.

I couldn't feel any worse if I tried.

Well, I know something that might make you feel better.

-[horn honking] -Surprise, Petey!

Ooh, mama-roonie.

The 62' Thunderhead LeGrande del Bravo.

Yep. Peg bought her for ya.

She's in brand spankin' new condition, too,

Except this power steerin's not too powerful.

I can't quite find the clutch.

[Pete] Don't scratch her.

The brake, goof! Hit the brake!

Aah!

[crash]

Thanks, goof. For a minute there,

I thought I'd hit rock bottom,

then you came along.

[gear whirring]

[police officer] Ahem. Let's see now-- parking on a residential lawn on a Tuesday

between 10 and 4 without a permit within 15 feet of a red zone

while blocking access to a fire hydrant

on an alternate street-cleaning day.

[sad chuckle]

♪ Gimme a beat ♪

[theme music playing]

Yeah!