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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,796 --> 00:00:05,714 [The Oops] Previously on Kidding... 2 00:00:05,797 --> 00:00:07,216 I'm sorry, what did you say? 3 00:00:07,299 --> 00:00:08,717 I said you've had a minor stroke. 4 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:09,885 Astronotter is getting on that rocket! 5 00:00:09,968 --> 00:00:11,553 [Scott] You want Astronotter? 6 00:00:11,637 --> 00:00:13,138 Give me one more day a week with my daughter. 7 00:00:13,222 --> 00:00:14,223 [Cornell] An aide brings them to the bus stop 8 00:00:14,306 --> 00:00:16,558 and they wait until they forget why they wanted 9 00:00:16,642 --> 00:00:17,184 to leave in the first place. 10 00:00:21,355 --> 00:00:23,315 [man over P. A.] Please remain calm. 11 00:00:23,398 --> 00:00:25,400 Thank you for visiting "Pickles on Ice." 12 00:00:25,484 --> 00:00:27,069 [Brian] It's all my fault. 13 00:00:27,152 --> 00:00:28,612 It's all my fault. 14 00:00:28,695 --> 00:00:30,739 I broke her throat, Dad. 15 00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:33,075 ‐ I‐‐I broke Tara's throat. ‐ [man] Of course not. 16 00:00:33,158 --> 00:00:36,495 Stupid dick‐nose piece of shit. 17 00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:38,539 ♪ light, quirky music ♪ 18 00:00:38,622 --> 00:00:44,294 ♪♪♪ 19 00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:46,463 [electronic door chime] 20 00:00:46,547 --> 00:00:49,216 [both grumbling unintelligibly] 21 00:00:52,177 --> 00:00:53,804 I'm sorry, I can't hear you. 22 00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:56,098 [both grumbling unintelligibly] 23 00:00:56,181 --> 00:00:58,141 ‐ What? ‐ [gun cocks] 24 00:00:58,225 --> 00:00:59,977 What the fuck? You fuckin‐‐ 25 00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:00,936 [gun cocks] 26 00:01:01,019 --> 00:01:03,313 What the fuck? Oh, my God! 27 00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:04,648 [yelps] 28 00:01:04,731 --> 00:01:10,445 ♪♪♪ 29 00:01:19,705 --> 00:01:21,582 ♪ lively percussive music ♪ 30 00:01:21,665 --> 00:01:27,421 ♪♪♪ 31 00:01:33,719 --> 00:01:36,722 [dog barking] 32 00:01:36,805 --> 00:01:39,641 [groans] 33 00:01:39,725 --> 00:01:42,603 ♪ tense music ♪ 34 00:01:42,686 --> 00:01:45,772 ♪♪♪ 35 00:01:45,856 --> 00:01:48,859 [tires screeching] 36 00:01:55,032 --> 00:01:57,993 [panting] 37 00:01:58,076 --> 00:02:03,040 ♪♪♪ 38 00:02:06,418 --> 00:02:09,212 [engine revving] 39 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:14,259 [tires screeching] 40 00:02:18,722 --> 00:02:20,557 [groaning] 41 00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:23,310 [panting] 42 00:02:23,393 --> 00:02:25,354 [indistinct radio chatter] 43 00:02:33,111 --> 00:02:35,697 [Jeff] I almost got a plate number. 44 00:02:35,781 --> 00:02:37,032 [panting] Are you guys okay? 45 00:02:37,115 --> 00:02:39,368 [laughs] We're great, Jeff. 46 00:02:39,451 --> 00:02:41,161 We're great. We're great. 47 00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:42,996 We're so motherfucking great right now. 48 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,791 We're the best! We're so good! 49 00:02:45,874 --> 00:02:47,668 Fuck you! 50 00:02:47,751 --> 00:02:49,002 ‐ I ran as fast as I could. ‐ [Jill] Oh, yeah? 51 00:02:49,086 --> 00:02:51,505 Are you gonna catch the guy? 52 00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:52,798 Are you gonna tell him to take a calm me down breath? 53 00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:55,092 You gonna teach him to read? 54 00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,385 I think it'd be safer for you guys 55 00:02:56,468 --> 00:02:57,886 to stay at Dee Dee's with me. 56 00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:59,888 [laughs] You're the one they wanna hurt. 57 00:02:59,971 --> 00:03:01,640 You're the one who is talking to their children 58 00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:03,225 in the middle of the night. 59 00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:05,227 Nobody is safe around you. 60 00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:07,354 Is that a ring? 61 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:09,272 Go away. 62 00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:11,733 Congrats, pal. 63 00:03:11,817 --> 00:03:13,402 Thanks, bud. 64 00:03:19,783 --> 00:03:21,034 ‐ I'm just gonna‐‐ ‐ [Jill] Jeff! 65 00:03:21,118 --> 00:03:22,411 ‐ I swear to Christ. ‐ [Jeff] Yeah. 66 00:03:22,494 --> 00:03:25,414 ♪ mournful music ♪ 67 00:03:25,497 --> 00:03:29,459 ♪♪♪ 68 00:03:43,932 --> 00:03:45,517 [Deirdre] Where's the sitter? 69 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,269 I sent her home. It was getting late. 70 00:03:48,979 --> 00:03:50,480 You used the stove. 71 00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:52,899 Is there another way to make risotto? 72 00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:54,151 You should be in bed. 73 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:56,903 You know I can't sleep without Dolores. 74 00:03:58,321 --> 00:03:59,990 You named your axe Dolores? 75 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:02,409 After Dolores Claiborne. It's my favorite axe movie. 76 00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,119 It's a hatchet. 77 00:04:04,202 --> 00:04:06,163 [sighs] Why can't you just let me live? 78 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:08,206 Here. 79 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:12,544 Go to sleep. Blade side out. 80 00:04:12,627 --> 00:04:14,880 I know how to sleep with an axe, Mom. 81 00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:18,717 Wow. 82 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,135 Grandpa teach you how to make this? 83 00:04:20,218 --> 00:04:22,846 No, Dolores did. She's from Tuscany. 84 00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:25,223 Thanks for dinner. 85 00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:26,933 I don't know what I'd do without you. 86 00:04:27,017 --> 00:04:28,685 If you really want Astronotter back, 87 00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:29,853 I can give you some advice. 88 00:04:29,936 --> 00:04:31,104 Sure. 89 00:04:31,188 --> 00:04:31,938 Just ask yourself... 90 00:04:32,022 --> 00:04:33,523 what would Grandpa do? 91 00:04:39,780 --> 00:04:41,698 ♪ slow music ♪ 92 00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:47,496 ♪♪♪ 93 00:04:48,747 --> 00:04:50,081 Dad? 94 00:04:50,165 --> 00:04:51,917 You keep sleeping. 95 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,336 I won't let anything happen to you. 96 00:04:54,419 --> 00:04:55,837 [Jeff] How long have you been sitting there? 97 00:04:55,921 --> 00:04:57,631 Go back to bed, Jeffrey. 98 00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:00,133 When the gun goes off, then you can wake up. 99 00:05:01,802 --> 00:05:03,762 I'm sorry I put you all in this situation. 100 00:05:03,845 --> 00:05:06,014 The world is full of lunatics 101 00:05:06,097 --> 00:05:08,266 who think the world is full of lunatics. 102 00:05:11,436 --> 00:05:14,439 None of this would've happened if I hadn't fired you. 103 00:05:14,523 --> 00:05:17,567 You can't really fire your father. 104 00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:20,362 If he can't protect you from yourself, 105 00:05:20,445 --> 00:05:22,155 he'll protect you from everyone else. 106 00:05:22,239 --> 00:05:23,532 [gun clicking] 107 00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:30,956 I'm still sorry I did it. 108 00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:34,000 Don't you worry about me. 109 00:05:34,084 --> 00:05:35,544 I'm having a social summer. 110 00:05:35,627 --> 00:05:40,090 In fact, your mother and I are taking a long vacation. 111 00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:42,801 What's that mean? 112 00:05:42,884 --> 00:05:45,220 She and I went through a rough patch, 113 00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:46,471 but we've recently reconnected. 114 00:05:46,555 --> 00:05:51,518 Bags are packed. We're leaving tomorrow morning. 115 00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:54,771 Where? I'm not sure yet. 116 00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:56,940 The unknown, I guess. 117 00:05:57,816 --> 00:06:00,360 I don't think Mom can travel right now. 118 00:06:00,443 --> 00:06:00,986 [bell dings] 119 00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:03,154 Hold that thought. 120 00:06:03,238 --> 00:06:04,614 Made you an egg tart 121 00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:07,075 for that squishy, squishy tum‐tum of yours. 122 00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:16,459 Oh, damn thing's on the fritz again. 123 00:06:20,130 --> 00:06:22,966 That quiche should've set a half hour ago. 124 00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:24,426 ♪ light, ambient music ♪ 125 00:06:24,509 --> 00:06:25,886 Dad, why don't you come sit down? 126 00:06:25,969 --> 00:06:27,637 Sit? 127 00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:30,891 I'm gonna have to lay on the goddamn floor 128 00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:32,601 and start that pilot light. 129 00:06:32,684 --> 00:06:34,436 Dad, it's not a real oven. 130 00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:35,604 You don't have to tell me that. 131 00:06:35,687 --> 00:06:37,105 I wanted a Thermador, 132 00:06:37,188 --> 00:06:40,108 but your mother, she just microwaves everything. 133 00:06:40,191 --> 00:06:42,110 Did you glue these drawers shut? 134 00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:44,738 They're not real drawers, Dad. They don't open. 135 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,741 We're on the set. 136 00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:50,160 What? 137 00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:51,578 What the hell is this? 138 00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:55,957 Where are we? 139 00:06:56,041 --> 00:06:58,835 Where'd the wall go? 140 00:06:58,918 --> 00:07:01,129 I had photographs on that wall! 141 00:07:02,213 --> 00:07:05,300 Where's the wall, Jeff? 142 00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:08,637 Where's the fucking wall? 143 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:12,140 ♪♪♪ 144 00:07:12,223 --> 00:07:15,727 There used to be a wall there. 145 00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:17,979 And a door and a window! 146 00:07:18,063 --> 00:07:20,649 [breathing heavily] 147 00:07:20,732 --> 00:07:22,525 Come back, Dad. 148 00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:24,861 ‐ I'm fine. ‐ Come back. 149 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:26,655 I'm gonna get you an ambulance. 150 00:07:26,738 --> 00:07:29,449 No, don't do that. I'm fine. I'm okay. 151 00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:31,660 I think it's just a toothache. 152 00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:36,164 ♪♪♪ 153 00:07:43,296 --> 00:07:44,464 ‐ Hi. ‐ [shrieks] 154 00:07:44,547 --> 00:07:47,175 Did you make an Oops last night? 155 00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:49,844 ‐ [wailing] ‐ She did. 156 00:07:49,928 --> 00:07:52,639 That's why she takes Plan B, 157 00:07:52,722 --> 00:07:55,225 the number one gynecologist recommended 158 00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:56,810 morning after pill. 159 00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:58,103 Oops as Directed. 160 00:07:58,186 --> 00:08:01,523 I mean, is "cinema" too strong of a word? 161 00:08:01,606 --> 00:08:04,651 Because to me, this is cinema. 162 00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:06,236 [doorbell rings] 163 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:08,154 Ah, she's early. 164 00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:09,656 [inhales] Come on. 165 00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:11,533 [Scott] Dee Dee, welcome. 166 00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:15,245 Oh, this is Amber, my female girlfriend. 167 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:17,205 We need to talk about Astronotter. 168 00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:19,165 Oh, it‐‐ it's not a good time. 169 00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:20,083 You said to come over. 170 00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:22,293 I know. I wanted you to see the house. 171 00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:25,505 It's big, isn't it? For a house. 172 00:08:25,588 --> 00:08:27,173 We need to talk about Astronotter. 173 00:08:27,257 --> 00:08:29,134 We already had that discussion 174 00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:31,553 and I said it wasn't going to happen. 175 00:08:31,636 --> 00:08:33,388 Blake Griffin was there. The‐‐the sports person. 176 00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:35,390 ‐ How is that relevant? ‐ It's not. 177 00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:36,891 Blake Griffin is a friend of mine. 178 00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:38,893 Hm. 179 00:08:38,977 --> 00:08:40,145 I have an offer for you. 180 00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:42,731 You can't afford me. 181 00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:45,859 Still...you'll wanna hear it. 182 00:08:45,942 --> 00:08:46,693 ♪ mournful music ♪ 183 00:08:46,776 --> 00:08:49,195 Which brings us to the revised terms 184 00:08:49,279 --> 00:08:51,031 for the division of communal assets. 185 00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:54,743 My client will forfeit Astronotter, 186 00:08:54,826 --> 00:08:58,747 an intellectual property so valued at $21.4 million... 187 00:08:58,830 --> 00:09:00,665 ♪♪♪ 188 00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:02,208 ...Snagglehorse, intellectual property value 189 00:09:02,292 --> 00:09:05,378 of $18.2 million. 190 00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:07,922 Ennui Le Triste, with an intellectual property 191 00:09:08,006 --> 00:09:11,092 value of $26.1 million. 192 00:09:11,176 --> 00:09:13,386 Uke‐Larry, $29 million. 193 00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:15,930 Thump‐Thump, $9.4 million, 194 00:09:16,014 --> 00:09:20,935 and The Oops, $12.4 million. 195 00:09:21,019 --> 00:09:23,605 And per our terms, my client, Mr. Perera, 196 00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:25,982 forfeits his rights to the aforementioned 197 00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:27,984 intellectual properties and in return, 198 00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:30,236 he will be granted sole custody 199 00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,113 of one, Maddy Perera. 200 00:09:32,197 --> 00:09:35,575 Yes, that's right. 201 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:39,662 ♪♪♪ 202 00:09:43,374 --> 00:09:46,294 [machines beeping] 203 00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:49,589 What do you want me to do? 204 00:09:49,672 --> 00:09:51,091 [breathing raggedly] 205 00:09:51,174 --> 00:09:54,135 Say something. 206 00:09:54,219 --> 00:09:56,554 [breathing heavily] 207 00:09:56,638 --> 00:09:59,474 Say something, please. 208 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:01,601 [crying] Say something. 209 00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:04,646 Say something. Say something. 210 00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:06,731 [sobbing] Say something. 211 00:10:09,484 --> 00:10:12,529 [sobbing] 212 00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:19,536 What happened to the Lamborghini? 213 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,621 You're the Lamborghini. 214 00:10:23,790 --> 00:10:25,959 Can we also have a Lamborghini? 215 00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:28,211 I'm gonna see you all the time. 216 00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:32,090 On the weekends... most weekends. 217 00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:33,383 Previously agreed to weekends. 218 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:35,760 As well as two weeks during 219 00:10:35,844 --> 00:10:38,054 Celebrity Cruise Lines Pride at Sea. 220 00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:40,140 [engine turns over, car starts] 221 00:10:40,223 --> 00:10:42,976 Can you bring Dolores when you come to Daddy's house? 222 00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:44,519 Well, that's up to your father. 223 00:10:44,602 --> 00:10:47,397 Go ahead, Deirdre. Give her the axe. 224 00:10:50,108 --> 00:10:51,651 Love you, Lunch Bug! 225 00:10:51,734 --> 00:10:53,278 Was it the risotto? 226 00:10:54,279 --> 00:10:57,282 [phone vibrating] 227 00:11:01,244 --> 00:11:03,454 [sighs] Yeah? 228 00:11:03,538 --> 00:11:07,083 What happened? 229 00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:09,085 [sighs] 230 00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:11,254 ‐ I spoke to the neurologist. ‐ Yeah? 231 00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:13,631 He had a stroke. 232 00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:14,799 He isn't... 233 00:11:16,551 --> 00:11:19,721 He's not, uh...speaking. 234 00:11:22,473 --> 00:11:24,726 They don't know if he's gonna be able to come back. 235 00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:26,936 But... 236 00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:29,564 but I need to talk to him. 237 00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:31,941 I need...I did it. 238 00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:35,069 I made‐‐I made it happen. 239 00:11:35,153 --> 00:11:37,739 I did it. I fixed it. 240 00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:40,575 I gotta go get Will. 241 00:11:43,995 --> 00:11:44,954 [indistinct PA announcement] 242 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:49,083 [toilet flushing] 243 00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:52,253 [gargling] 244 00:11:52,337 --> 00:11:54,047 You want the end of this? 245 00:11:55,924 --> 00:11:58,760 I spoke to the guy who got Phil's lungs. 246 00:11:58,843 --> 00:12:00,803 I'm never smoking anything again. 247 00:12:00,887 --> 00:12:04,182 So are you gonna meet the lungs in person, like the eyes? 248 00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:06,559 Or...are lungs better over the phone? 249 00:12:06,643 --> 00:12:07,894 We're staying in a hotel for a week. 250 00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:12,148 My mom says I can only go to the school and hotel, 251 00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,859 so I definitely can't go see the guy who has Phil's lungs 252 00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:18,404 and I definitely can't take my girlfriend out anywhere. 253 00:12:18,488 --> 00:12:20,865 You should make out with her at the aquarium. 254 00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:23,117 That's where I treat my seasonal depression. 255 00:12:23,201 --> 00:12:25,286 It's the dolphins, man. 256 00:12:25,370 --> 00:12:26,371 Their sadness eats my sadness. 257 00:12:26,454 --> 00:12:29,332 [school bell rings] 258 00:12:29,415 --> 00:12:32,377 For your kiss breath. 259 00:12:34,712 --> 00:12:35,838 [door opens] 260 00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,340 [indistinct chatter] 261 00:12:37,423 --> 00:12:39,175 [door shuts] 262 00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:46,933 [spits] 263 00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:13,918 [footsteps echoing] 264 00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:38,401 ♪ ominous music ♪ 265 00:13:38,484 --> 00:13:43,114 ♪♪♪ 266 00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:44,407 Who are you? 267 00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:47,035 I'm Jeff Pickles. 268 00:13:47,118 --> 00:13:48,453 There was an old Jeff Pickles, 269 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:50,872 but now it's time for a new one. 270 00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:53,041 That's me. 271 00:13:53,124 --> 00:13:56,377 The old Jeff lost his way when your mom killed your brother. 272 00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:59,088 Then she divorced him, started seeing another man 273 00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:02,050 and that broke him completely. 274 00:14:02,133 --> 00:14:04,552 Your mom, she's a nurse. 275 00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:07,138 She took the Nightingale Pledge. 276 00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:10,099 Do you know the Nightingale Pledge? 277 00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:12,560 It goes like this... 278 00:14:12,643 --> 00:14:15,980 I will abstain from what is deleterious. 279 00:14:16,064 --> 00:14:17,732 Do you know what deleterious means? 280 00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:20,943 It means...harmful. 281 00:14:21,027 --> 00:14:24,947 And unfortunately, your mother is very harmful. 282 00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:26,365 She was driving the car. 283 00:14:26,449 --> 00:14:29,452 She should've told Phil to put his seat belt on. 284 00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:32,080 She harmed him. 285 00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:34,540 I don't want her to harm you too. 286 00:14:34,624 --> 00:14:36,959 My mom didn't kill my brother. 287 00:14:39,003 --> 00:14:41,589 I'm sorry, but she did. 288 00:14:41,672 --> 00:14:43,174 No. 289 00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:44,759 He's still alive. 290 00:14:44,842 --> 00:14:46,761 What? 291 00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:50,264 I looked into his eyes. They were his eyes. 292 00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:54,560 I stared into them and they stared back. 293 00:14:54,644 --> 00:14:58,022 His lungs wrote me an email and I emailed them back. 294 00:14:58,106 --> 00:15:00,358 I talked to his heart on the phone 295 00:15:00,441 --> 00:15:02,527 after it ran 20 miles. 296 00:15:02,610 --> 00:15:05,113 His heart is training to run a marathon. 297 00:15:05,196 --> 00:15:07,657 Phil is training to run a marathon. 298 00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:10,660 ♪ light music ♪ 299 00:15:10,743 --> 00:15:13,037 ♪♪♪ 300 00:15:18,376 --> 00:15:20,128 Put this in the trunk. 301 00:15:20,211 --> 00:15:23,047 ♪ ominous music ♪ 302 00:15:23,131 --> 00:15:25,508 I'm not gonna hurt you, pickle pal. 303 00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:30,638 ♪♪♪ 304 00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:37,728 ♪ When it's time to make a choice, make a choice ♪ 305 00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:45,778 ♪ You only need to listen to the voice that's true ♪ 306 00:15:54,245 --> 00:15:55,580 Come on, Will. We gotta go. 307 00:15:55,663 --> 00:15:58,416 I'm your dad now. 308 00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:02,503 [grunting] 309 00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:04,088 [shouts] 310 00:16:07,842 --> 00:16:09,177 [both grunting] 311 00:16:13,431 --> 00:16:14,765 [Will] Dad? 312 00:16:14,849 --> 00:16:17,852 [breathing heavily] 313 00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:22,565 [panting] 314 00:16:28,779 --> 00:16:30,072 Mr. Pickles. 315 00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:31,115 [whispering] He just beat the shit out of that guy. 316 00:16:33,826 --> 00:16:36,787 [indistinct radio chatter] 317 00:16:39,957 --> 00:16:41,959 [Officer Brannagan] Will? 318 00:16:42,043 --> 00:16:44,503 Can you tell me what he said to you? 319 00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:48,549 It's okay. 320 00:16:50,051 --> 00:16:52,261 He said that he's the new Jeff Pickles. 321 00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:55,723 Well, we all know that there's only one Jeff Pickles 322 00:16:55,806 --> 00:16:56,682 and he doesn't wear a mask. 323 00:16:56,766 --> 00:16:58,601 What else did he say? 324 00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:01,103 Um, that my mom... 325 00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:04,732 that she ruined everything 326 00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:06,108 because she killed my brother. 327 00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:11,864 That if she'd told Phil to put on his seat belt, 328 00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:15,618 that none of this would've happened. 329 00:17:17,495 --> 00:17:19,747 You okay? 330 00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:21,415 Just answer the officer's questions. 331 00:17:21,499 --> 00:17:23,751 Did you say anything back to him? 332 00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:27,546 I told him that in a lot of ways, Phil's still alive. 333 00:17:29,131 --> 00:17:30,591 What did you mean by that? 334 00:17:30,675 --> 00:17:33,261 You know, in our memories. 335 00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:39,642 Do I have to go back to school? 336 00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:41,269 No, we can go home. 337 00:17:41,352 --> 00:17:43,312 A‐actually, can I go with Dad? 338 00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:51,279 ♪ tense music ♪ 339 00:17:51,362 --> 00:17:55,324 ♪♪♪ 340 00:18:03,708 --> 00:18:07,003 You are my family 341 00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:09,005 and I'm here to protect you. 342 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:14,051 ♪♪♪ 343 00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:23,686 [sighs] 344 00:18:25,146 --> 00:18:27,273 I did it. 345 00:18:27,356 --> 00:18:29,025 They're back. 346 00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:31,569 I got 'em all back. [laughs softly] 347 00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:37,825 Astronotter, she's going to space. 348 00:18:39,493 --> 00:18:41,662 And we're gonna broadcast it. 349 00:18:41,746 --> 00:18:42,747 And... 350 00:18:42,830 --> 00:18:44,915 and... [sniffles] 351 00:18:44,999 --> 00:18:49,211 ...and I got it all back. 352 00:18:54,425 --> 00:18:56,844 Because... 353 00:18:56,927 --> 00:18:58,387 you taught me what to sacrifice. 354 00:19:03,517 --> 00:19:05,978 [sniffles, sighs] 355 00:19:07,605 --> 00:19:11,484 I'm...proud... 356 00:19:11,567 --> 00:19:14,737 Of...you. 357 00:19:16,405 --> 00:19:18,866 [inhales] 358 00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:30,044 Are you afraid people are going to not like you anymore 359 00:19:30,127 --> 00:19:31,879 after seeing what you did to that guy? 360 00:19:33,798 --> 00:19:37,009 Even Jesus had enemies. 361 00:19:37,093 --> 00:19:38,969 Jesus never beat the shit out of anyone. 362 00:19:39,053 --> 00:19:40,513 He didn't have a son. 363 00:19:44,058 --> 00:19:46,102 I'm sorry about your dad. 364 00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:49,939 Promise you'll be there for me when I'm old? 365 00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:52,942 I know you will, I just... 366 00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,902 need to hear you say it today. 367 00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:56,737 I promise. 368 00:19:56,821 --> 00:19:57,947 Thanks. 369 00:19:58,030 --> 00:20:01,492 We should go see Grandpa. 370 00:20:01,575 --> 00:20:06,455 He stopped...talking, so... 371 00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:07,873 maybe you could do one of your magic tricks. 372 00:20:07,957 --> 00:20:10,334 Make him say something. 373 00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:17,925 Hey, Dad, I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, 374 00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:20,678 but I really like your new haircut. 375 00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:25,099 ♪ soft music ♪ 376 00:20:25,182 --> 00:20:29,145 ♪♪♪ 377 00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:30,938 [Deirdre] The stroke triggered something 378 00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:33,149 called vascular dementia. 379 00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:35,484 His doctors want us to decide on his long‐term care. 380 00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:40,197 They talk about him like he's a bag of broccoli. 381 00:20:40,281 --> 00:20:41,157 [both chuckling] 382 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,869 But he can‐‐ he can walk, he can eat. 383 00:20:45,870 --> 00:20:48,122 What are our options? 384 00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:50,082 What happened to your hand? 385 00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:53,544 What are our options? 386 00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:56,297 [mechanical voice] There is so much the Koreans 387 00:20:56,380 --> 00:20:57,631 are trying to prove this year. 388 00:20:57,715 --> 00:20:59,508 Just look at the grace and beauty 389 00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:01,552 and flow to those jumps. 390 00:21:01,635 --> 00:21:03,637 And it's not just the technical difficulty, 391 00:21:03,721 --> 00:21:06,015 it is the artistry. 392 00:21:06,098 --> 00:21:09,185 In other news, Mr. Pickles almost Mr. Killed A Guy today 393 00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:11,228 in the parking lot of a Columbus high school. 394 00:21:11,312 --> 00:21:12,563 Sources describe the perpetrator 395 00:21:12,646 --> 00:21:16,025 as a large‐headed version of the popular TV host. 396 00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:18,360 He's really gone, isn't he? 397 00:21:20,446 --> 00:21:22,072 Yeah. 398 00:21:22,156 --> 00:21:23,157 Well, there's in‐home care, 399 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,993 which means we'd basically have to hire 400 00:21:26,076 --> 00:21:29,038 a nurse around the clock. 401 00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:31,665 And even then, he's never gonna take the pills. 402 00:21:34,752 --> 00:21:36,962 How is he? 403 00:21:37,046 --> 00:21:39,256 [sighs] 404 00:21:39,340 --> 00:21:41,425 Have you ever... 405 00:21:41,509 --> 00:21:44,512 have you ever wanted to turn back time? 406 00:21:44,595 --> 00:21:47,598 ♪ light music ♪ 407 00:21:47,681 --> 00:21:50,351 I was just thinking that same thing. 408 00:21:50,434 --> 00:21:52,561 [Deirdre] Thank you. 409 00:21:52,645 --> 00:21:54,396 Great. Okay. Bye‐bye now. 410 00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,025 That was Toyco. 411 00:21:58,108 --> 00:21:59,777 Are they mad? 412 00:21:59,860 --> 00:22:01,904 No, it's odd. 413 00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:04,281 They're making more dolls. 414 00:22:04,365 --> 00:22:07,409 They sold out online. 415 00:22:07,493 --> 00:22:09,870 I guess breaking that guy's face 416 00:22:09,954 --> 00:22:12,081 actually made children want more of you. 417 00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:13,874 [scoffs] 418 00:22:13,958 --> 00:22:16,919 [phone vibrating] 419 00:22:17,002 --> 00:22:21,966 ♪♪♪ 420 00:22:34,562 --> 00:22:37,106 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on, hold on. 421 00:22:40,150 --> 00:22:42,111 Wasn't this guy the worst? 422 00:22:42,194 --> 00:22:45,155 Yes, but he's about to send Neil Armstrong to the moon. 423 00:22:49,201 --> 00:22:51,996 Hey, pal, two parts gin, one part lime juice. 424 00:22:52,079 --> 00:22:54,540 What's the holdup? 425 00:22:57,543 --> 00:23:00,254 I don't know how I feel about leaving him here. 426 00:23:00,337 --> 00:23:02,631 He's so...alone. 427 00:23:05,259 --> 00:23:07,887 He's not alone. 428 00:23:07,970 --> 00:23:10,681 [slow music plays in background] 429 00:23:12,266 --> 00:23:15,936 ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪ 430 00:23:16,020 --> 00:23:20,316 ♪ Be mine ♪ 431 00:23:20,399 --> 00:23:24,570 ♪ For the rest of my life ♪ 432 00:23:28,782 --> 00:23:31,619 ♪ I can't hide the way I feel... ♪ 433 00:23:31,702 --> 00:23:34,496 Hello. 434 00:23:34,580 --> 00:23:35,998 What's your name? 435 00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:41,754 ♪ Be mine ♪ 436 00:23:41,837 --> 00:23:43,797 ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh... ♪ 437 00:23:43,881 --> 00:23:46,300 [sighs] 438 00:23:48,552 --> 00:23:49,720 [groans] 439 00:23:53,182 --> 00:23:54,808 Where are you going? 440 00:23:54,892 --> 00:23:56,852 Just give me the drink before you pour it down my throat. 441 00:23:56,936 --> 00:23:59,188 [sighs] 442 00:24:01,774 --> 00:24:04,443 I'd like to buy you another one and... 443 00:24:04,526 --> 00:24:06,612 find out everything there is to like about you. 444 00:24:06,695 --> 00:24:09,531 I'd like to buy you a taxi ride in the other direction. 445 00:24:09,615 --> 00:24:11,367 Well, aren't you seven shovels short of a grave. 446 00:24:11,450 --> 00:24:14,244 Well, aren't you arrogant and charmless. 447 00:24:14,328 --> 00:24:16,121 Why don't we just get to the end of this 448 00:24:16,205 --> 00:24:17,957 and you can pour gasoline on my lap. 449 00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:19,667 I bet you'd look good on fire. 450 00:24:19,750 --> 00:24:21,377 I bet you'd look the same. 451 00:24:21,460 --> 00:24:23,295 Have we met before? 452 00:24:23,379 --> 00:24:25,839 I don't think so. 453 00:24:25,923 --> 00:24:27,174 I'm Louise. 454 00:24:27,257 --> 00:24:30,511 Hello, Louise. I'm Seb. 455 00:24:33,764 --> 00:24:36,934 Home, Seb, since you asked. I'm going home. 456 00:24:37,017 --> 00:24:38,894 ♪ soft music ♪ 457 00:24:38,978 --> 00:24:43,482 ♪♪♪ 458 00:24:43,565 --> 00:24:46,360 How do they know each other? 459 00:24:46,443 --> 00:24:47,569 That's our mom, Will. 460 00:24:50,155 --> 00:24:52,491 Oh. 461 00:24:52,574 --> 00:24:53,701 What time does the bus come? 462 00:24:56,161 --> 00:24:57,538 Any minute now. 463 00:24:57,621 --> 00:25:00,541 ♪ dramatic music ♪ 464 00:25:00,624 --> 00:25:05,462 ♪♪♪ 465 00:25:20,227 --> 00:25:23,939 [soft clicking] 466 00:25:30,904 --> 00:25:33,115 Do you think it was my fault? 467 00:25:35,075 --> 00:25:37,036 Was what your fault? 468 00:25:38,787 --> 00:25:39,913 I was driving the car. 469 00:25:39,997 --> 00:25:41,790 I'm the mom. 470 00:25:41,874 --> 00:25:46,045 Be honest with me right now. Was the accident my fault? 471 00:25:53,844 --> 00:25:56,388 Nobody thinks that. 472 00:25:56,472 --> 00:26:01,185 Now, please don't let the words 473 00:26:01,268 --> 00:26:03,353 of crazy, large‐headed people 474 00:26:03,437 --> 00:26:06,106 get inside your normal‐sized head. 475 00:26:06,190 --> 00:26:08,150 I'm asking you. 476 00:26:08,233 --> 00:26:08,984 Am I responsible? 477 00:26:09,068 --> 00:26:11,945 Am I the parent? 478 00:26:12,029 --> 00:26:14,865 You are the parent. 479 00:26:14,948 --> 00:26:16,492 You're not responsible. 480 00:26:17,493 --> 00:26:21,663 Wanna go find some sunshine? 481 00:26:21,747 --> 00:26:22,956 [breathes shakily] In a minute. 482 00:26:23,040 --> 00:26:25,793 Okay. 483 00:26:25,876 --> 00:26:26,710 ‐ Thank you. ‐ Yep. 484 00:26:41,767 --> 00:26:44,937 I know that was hard today, with Grandpa. 485 00:26:47,064 --> 00:26:48,816 I think he'll be okay. 486 00:26:51,235 --> 00:26:54,154 ♪ ominous music ♪ 487 00:26:54,238 --> 00:26:59,993 ♪♪♪ 488 00:27:07,459 --> 00:27:09,670 You okay? 489 00:27:09,753 --> 00:27:13,173 Are you...sad I don't look like Phil anymore? 490 00:27:14,675 --> 00:27:16,844 No. 491 00:27:16,927 --> 00:27:18,971 I always saw you. 492 00:27:22,474 --> 00:27:24,726 I, uh... 493 00:27:24,810 --> 00:27:26,770 I want to show you something 494 00:27:26,854 --> 00:27:28,939 that I found in Mom's closet. 495 00:27:33,235 --> 00:27:35,279 What is this? 496 00:27:35,362 --> 00:27:38,240 ♪ soft music ♪ 497 00:27:38,323 --> 00:27:44,037 ♪♪♪ 33810

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