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1
00:00:10,951 --> 00:00:14,951
www.titlovi.com
2
00:00:17,951 --> 00:00:20,191
Oh hi, Sally.
3
00:00:20,220 --> 00:00:21,120
It's Mary.
4
00:00:23,323 --> 00:00:26,363
Well, actually I was
wondering whether
5
00:00:26,393 --> 00:00:30,103
we should take the Brownies
somewhere else this weekend.
6
00:00:30,130 --> 00:00:31,230
Oh, no reason.
7
00:00:32,265 --> 00:00:34,465
No, nothing to do with work.
8
00:00:35,502 --> 00:00:36,372
Oh gosh.
9
00:00:37,637 --> 00:00:40,367
Well, anywhere really.
10
00:00:45,578 --> 00:00:47,108
Shetland?
11
00:00:59,192 --> 00:01:01,232
And in short, that's
why I have to sleep
12
00:01:01,261 --> 00:01:02,461
completely naked.
13
00:01:04,497 --> 00:01:06,197
Well, that's good to know.
14
00:01:06,232 --> 00:01:07,502
Okay, so just to
remind everyone,
15
00:01:07,534 --> 00:01:09,204
we're still on Amber
alert following
16
00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:10,465
the poisoned water attacks
17
00:01:10,503 --> 00:01:12,413
that took place in
Paris over the weekend.
18
00:01:12,439 --> 00:01:14,169
How far is Paris?
19
00:01:14,207 --> 00:01:15,577
Aside from Paris, what
else is going on, Joseph?
20
00:01:15,608 --> 00:01:17,138
Do we have a systems update?
21
00:01:17,177 --> 00:01:18,747
Yes, not great I'm afraid.
22
00:01:18,778 --> 00:01:20,648
Tuva's already looking into
who might be behind it.
23
00:01:20,680 --> 00:01:22,520
But we had an attack on one
of our own servers last night.
24
00:01:22,549 --> 00:01:24,219
Oh, fucking tense!
25
00:01:24,250 --> 00:01:25,220
I know.
26
00:01:25,251 --> 00:01:26,221
When exactly did it happen?
27
00:01:26,252 --> 00:01:28,362
No!
28
00:01:28,388 --> 00:01:29,518
Attention please.
29
00:01:29,556 --> 00:01:30,516
This is a test.
30
00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:33,157
Please take no action.
31
00:01:33,193 --> 00:01:34,393
What on earth are you doing?
32
00:01:34,427 --> 00:01:35,297
Sorry.
33
00:01:36,529 --> 00:01:39,469
I still get PTSD from
my time in Afghanistan.
34
00:01:39,499 --> 00:01:40,769
You never served
in Afghanistan.
35
00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:42,370
Yeah, I know.
36
00:01:42,402 --> 00:01:44,342
But the drone footage I
saw was very realistic.
37
00:01:44,371 --> 00:01:45,741
How much data was compromised?
38
00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:47,772
Yeah, it may sound
insulting really.
39
00:01:47,807 --> 00:01:50,437
Macedites from
the middle server.
40
00:01:50,477 --> 00:01:51,707
They did manage to
capture a tiny bit
41
00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:53,545
of Mary's internet
browsing history, sadly.
42
00:01:53,580 --> 00:01:54,810
Oh no.
43
00:01:54,848 --> 00:01:56,448
Please tell me none
of that was sensitive.
44
00:01:56,483 --> 00:01:57,683
No, apart from
45
00:01:59,352 --> 00:02:02,422
I have been looking
online for a new bra.
46
00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:03,555
Really, what type?
47
00:02:03,590 --> 00:02:05,360
Just a brown one.
48
00:02:05,392 --> 00:02:06,392
Yeah baby.
49
00:02:06,426 --> 00:02:07,626
Found him.
50
00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:08,730
This is our hacker.
51
00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:16,472
Fuck me.
-Oh my gosh.
52
00:02:16,503 --> 00:02:18,243
Gosh, what a dick.
53
00:02:18,271 --> 00:02:20,341
Sorry, Jerry, do you mind
using less bad language?
54
00:02:20,373 --> 00:02:21,343
Seriously?
55
00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:23,482
Shit is fine
thought, isn't it?
56
00:02:23,510 --> 00:02:24,780
Now I say shit all the time.
57
00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:25,881
No you just talk shit.
58
00:02:25,912 --> 00:02:27,482
There's a difference.
59
00:02:27,514 --> 00:02:28,684
Oh yeah!
60
00:02:29,883 --> 00:02:31,753
No, you have to let go.
-Sorry.
61
00:02:31,785 --> 00:02:32,815
This guy is good.
62
00:02:32,852 --> 00:02:34,852
He once hacked the NSA database.
63
00:02:34,888 --> 00:02:36,788
NSA database, really?
64
00:02:38,258 --> 00:02:40,288
You know maybe we should
bring this guy in.
65
00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:41,326
Make him part of the team.
66
00:02:41,361 --> 00:02:42,431
Absolutely not.
67
00:02:42,462 --> 00:02:43,702
I'm serious.
68
00:02:43,730 --> 00:02:46,230
I mean Tuva used to
be a hacker, right?
69
00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:48,396
I don't know if I
appreciate the term hacker
70
00:02:48,435 --> 00:02:50,535
because I'm also a singer.
71
00:02:50,570 --> 00:02:52,640
The only reason Tuva is here
72
00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:54,742
is because she made a bargaining
plea with the government
73
00:02:54,774 --> 00:02:57,884
in exchange for some
highly sensitive intel.
74
00:02:57,911 --> 00:02:59,411
Please don't say-
75
00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:00,646
It was about the
Brexit campaign.
76
00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,650
What that was about.
77
00:03:02,682 --> 00:03:05,422
My point is we should
keep our enemies close.
78
00:03:05,452 --> 00:03:07,252
Surely we can agree on that.
79
00:03:07,287 --> 00:03:09,417
Look, give me 48 hours with him.
80
00:03:09,456 --> 00:03:10,656
If it doesn't work out,
81
00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:12,930
I'm willing to take
the hit on this.
82
00:03:12,959 --> 00:03:14,489
Fine.
83
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:15,357
Really?
84
00:03:15,395 --> 00:03:16,355
Why not?
85
00:03:16,396 --> 00:03:19,296
I have complete faith in you.
86
00:03:19,332 --> 00:03:22,872
Ah, looks like I'm
finally rubbing you off
87
00:03:22,902 --> 00:03:23,772
on me.
88
00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:25,544
Finally-
89
00:03:25,572 --> 00:03:26,442
Rubbing off on you.
90
00:03:26,473 --> 00:03:27,343
Rubbing?
91
00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,274
Rubbing off on you.
92
00:03:28,308 --> 00:03:29,408
I'm finally-
93
00:03:29,442 --> 00:03:30,882
Yes.
94
00:03:30,910 --> 00:03:31,850
Rubbing off on you.
-Yes, that's the saying.
95
00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:32,848
You're rubbing off on me.
96
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:33,709
You wish.
97
00:03:35,515 --> 00:03:36,745
Oh, one final thing.
98
00:03:36,783 --> 00:03:38,753
Barnaby Bailer will be
delivering his seminar
99
00:03:38,785 --> 00:03:41,315
on the politics of
cyber security this week
100
00:03:41,354 --> 00:03:42,464
to which you're all invited.
101
00:03:42,489 --> 00:03:43,419
Bailer?
102
00:03:43,456 --> 00:03:44,816
The middle east attache?
103
00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:46,358
I love that guy!
104
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:48,533
He and I used to make
these cupcakes together
105
00:03:48,561 --> 00:03:50,761
when he was over for nine 11.
106
00:03:52,365 --> 00:03:53,765
Who's running his
protection detail?
107
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:55,900
'Cause last time
got pretty rowdy.
108
00:03:55,935 --> 00:03:57,395
Oh, I'm sure his
people will run it
109
00:03:57,437 --> 00:03:59,367
given his somewhat
contentious legacy.
110
00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,366
Well, I'll pop down
there just to be sure.
111
00:04:01,408 --> 00:04:02,738
Know what I'm saying?
112
00:04:02,776 --> 00:04:04,976
I can't hear you.
113
00:04:05,011 --> 00:04:06,951
Just in case it
should come up,
114
00:04:06,980 --> 00:04:09,950
I actually used to
date Barnaby Bailer.
115
00:04:09,983 --> 00:04:11,423
What the fuck?
116
00:04:11,451 --> 00:04:12,621
Jerry, please.
117
00:04:12,652 --> 00:04:14,592
When we were in
university together.
118
00:04:14,621 --> 00:04:16,621
I don't suspect he'll
remember me, though.
119
00:04:16,656 --> 00:04:18,826
It was all, you
know, very brief.
120
00:04:18,858 --> 00:04:21,928
What, like in a premature
ejaculation kind of way?
121
00:04:21,961 --> 00:04:24,501
Sorry, I really don't
know what that is.
122
00:04:24,531 --> 00:04:25,871
Well, I'm sure
Joseph can show you.
123
00:04:30,637 --> 00:04:31,867
Well, what is it?
124
00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:34,910
Jerry?
125
00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:35,981
I don't know,
should we look it up?
126
00:04:42,716 --> 00:04:43,576
Thank you very much.
127
00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:44,476
Thank you.
128
00:04:51,524 --> 00:04:52,634
My contact at
the NSA has agreed
129
00:04:52,659 --> 00:04:54,629
to let me view
Jerry's internal file.
130
00:04:54,661 --> 00:04:56,501
Can you save it onto
the private server?
131
00:04:56,529 --> 00:04:57,829
It's important.
132
00:04:57,864 --> 00:05:00,674
Sure, do you
want an ice cream?
133
00:05:00,700 --> 00:05:03,600
Did you get
anything I just said?
134
00:05:03,636 --> 00:05:04,536
No.
135
00:05:12,912 --> 00:05:15,082
Is everything okay?
136
00:05:15,115 --> 00:05:18,115
Yeah, I don't know where
Jerry got to, that's all.
137
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:21,691
Oh, he and I usually have
a coffee around this time.
138
00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:25,861
Well, I'd bring him a coffee
and just watch him drink it.
139
00:05:25,892 --> 00:05:27,732
Thanks Mary.
140
00:05:28,628 --> 00:05:30,058
Oh, Quentin.
141
00:05:30,096 --> 00:05:30,956
Hello.
142
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:35,935
Sorry, I picked up mom's glasses
by accident this morning.
143
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:37,899
I thought you said
you couldn't see.
144
00:05:37,937 --> 00:05:40,537
Oh well, she can't at night.
145
00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:44,005
What are you up
to this evening?
146
00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:48,624
Well, I usually help mom
with her bath on Wednesdays.
147
00:05:49,916 --> 00:05:53,086
Let me know if I can
ever be of service.
148
00:05:53,119 --> 00:05:56,059
Oh, I don't think
mom would like that.
149
00:05:56,089 --> 00:05:59,029
She wouldn't know
if she can't see.
150
00:05:59,059 --> 00:06:02,829
She would know if there
were four hands in the bath.
151
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:03,762
Yes.
152
00:06:05,965 --> 00:06:07,925
Half an octopus.
153
00:06:07,967 --> 00:06:08,837
Yes.
154
00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:12,708
See you later.
155
00:06:12,739 --> 00:06:13,609
Okay.
156
00:06:17,510 --> 00:06:18,180
So I thought I'd start out
157
00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:19,951
by giving you like a quick tour
158
00:06:19,979 --> 00:06:21,179
and then I don't know.
159
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:23,724
Probably just hang
out, grab a drink.
160
00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:24,980
Maybe some tail.
161
00:06:25,018 --> 00:06:27,088
Guys, this is Tom.
162
00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:29,160
He's the one that hacked
our server the other night.
163
00:06:29,189 --> 00:06:30,119
Hey Tom.
164
00:06:30,156 --> 00:06:30,986
Hi.
165
00:06:31,024 --> 00:06:32,564
This is Mary.
166
00:06:32,592 --> 00:06:34,862
Mary's been with GCHQ
from the beginning.
167
00:06:34,894 --> 00:06:36,134
When was it founded, Mary?
168
00:06:36,162 --> 00:06:37,032
1919.
169
00:06:38,031 --> 00:06:38,971
Right, so then.
170
00:06:38,998 --> 00:06:40,968
Well, not quite.
171
00:06:41,001 --> 00:06:42,941
I'm actually a lot
younger than I look.
172
00:06:42,969 --> 00:06:44,599
Really, by how much?
173
00:06:44,637 --> 00:06:47,137
Gosh, no one's ever
asked me that before.
174
00:06:47,173 --> 00:06:49,883
Plus she's absolutely
filthy, you know what I mean?
175
00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:51,139
The mouth on her.
176
00:06:51,177 --> 00:06:52,677
This is Tuva.
177
00:06:52,712 --> 00:06:54,012
What'd you get up
to this weekend?
178
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:55,817
Not much.
179
00:06:55,849 --> 00:06:57,979
I just went to a club, got
with couple of salty jerks.
180
00:06:58,018 --> 00:06:59,648
Your accent's really fresh.
181
00:06:59,686 --> 00:07:00,586
Who is not to use it?
182
00:07:00,620 --> 00:07:01,860
It's a mix.
183
00:07:01,888 --> 00:07:04,088
So you hacked the GCHQ server?
184
00:07:04,124 --> 00:07:05,664
Yep.
185
00:07:05,692 --> 00:07:08,662
I don't know whether
to be impressed, annoyed
186
00:07:08,695 --> 00:07:09,595
or aroused.
187
00:07:10,897 --> 00:07:11,897
Probably annoyed.
188
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:13,571
Annoyed.
-Aroused.
189
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,840
I could sell the
sprinters off if you like.
190
00:07:15,869 --> 00:07:17,199
Hey Tom, this is Joseph.
191
00:07:17,237 --> 00:07:18,197
Yeah I'm sorry, I'm Joseph.
192
00:07:18,238 --> 00:07:19,668
How are you?
193
00:07:19,706 --> 00:07:20,136
I'm actually
Jerry's best friend.
194
00:07:20,173 --> 00:07:21,043
PA.
195
00:07:21,074 --> 00:07:21,914
Sorry, no, you go.
196
00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:23,841
Colleague.
197
00:07:23,877 --> 00:07:25,007
Do you always dress like that?
198
00:07:25,045 --> 00:07:25,975
Yes, why?
199
00:07:27,681 --> 00:07:29,081
No, that's cool.
200
00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:31,075
I was just wondering if it
was for a bet or something.
201
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:33,717
I can't even tell
if he's joking.
202
00:07:33,753 --> 00:07:35,863
Are you joking?
203
00:07:39,225 --> 00:07:40,255
Do you work out?
204
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:43,063
'Cause your traps are amazing.
205
00:07:43,096 --> 00:07:45,696
No, just came out like this.
206
00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:49,197
Let me introduce
you to Christine.
207
00:07:49,235 --> 00:07:52,965
She's like the scary
Mary Poppins of the team.
208
00:07:55,675 --> 00:07:57,275
He seems nice.
209
00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:59,710
I just think he finds me
a little bit intimidating,
210
00:07:59,746 --> 00:08:01,276
which is a shame really.
211
00:08:03,783 --> 00:08:05,023
You know, he's
hiding something,
212
00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:06,191
I'm sure of it.
213
00:08:06,219 --> 00:08:07,949
Our hands are tied, Chris.
214
00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:09,717
Sorry.
215
00:08:09,756 --> 00:08:12,926
Whitehall don't want us
digging around about Jerry.
216
00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:14,889
What's that noise?
217
00:08:14,928 --> 00:08:17,028
Are you still on
the Anthrax case?
218
00:08:17,063 --> 00:08:18,773
Sort of.
219
00:08:18,798 --> 00:08:20,268
Phantom of the Opera, Damascus.
220
00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,000
It's just starting.
221
00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:32,651
Well hey, just
out of interest.
222
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:34,249
Is it possible for
someone like you
223
00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:37,250
to hack into say, I don't know,
224
00:08:37,283 --> 00:08:39,753
the NSA database?
225
00:08:39,786 --> 00:08:42,916
Have a look around,
delete the odd file?
226
00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:43,886
You know someone's
actually trying
227
00:08:43,923 --> 00:08:46,093
to access your file right now.
228
00:08:46,126 --> 00:08:47,826
What?
229
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:49,701
Oh, that's uh, yeah.
230
00:08:49,729 --> 00:08:51,929
Can you abort that transfer?
231
00:08:51,965 --> 00:08:52,995
Just for fun?
232
00:08:54,167 --> 00:08:56,037
Yeah, I can just do,
233
00:08:57,137 --> 00:08:57,997
aborted.
234
00:09:05,245 --> 00:09:06,105
Uh...
235
00:09:06,146 --> 00:09:07,776
What's happening?
236
00:09:07,814 --> 00:09:08,784
It's uploading again.
237
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:09,715
What the?
238
00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:12,821
I could just permanently
delete the file.
239
00:09:12,852 --> 00:09:16,762
I would love to see
what that looks like.
240
00:09:18,825 --> 00:09:20,955
I love your cologne, by the way.
241
00:09:20,994 --> 00:09:23,704
I'm not wearing any.
242
00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:24,830
Still.
243
00:09:24,864 --> 00:09:25,904
Done.
244
00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:46,992
Jerry.
245
00:09:47,020 --> 00:09:48,250
Yeah?
246
00:09:48,288 --> 00:09:50,158
Should I clean up
your browsing history?
247
00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:51,830
Yeah, please.
248
00:09:51,858 --> 00:09:53,758
That would be great.
249
00:09:55,795 --> 00:09:57,225
I'll be back.
250
00:09:57,263 --> 00:09:58,163
Hey.
251
00:09:58,198 --> 00:09:59,368
Hey man.
252
00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:00,329
I just wondered
if you would fancy
253
00:10:00,367 --> 00:10:01,867
going to the canteen together.
254
00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:03,101
I do know that curly
sausage you like.
255
00:10:03,136 --> 00:10:04,836
Oh man, I'd love
to but actually
256
00:10:04,871 --> 00:10:07,341
Tom and I are going
out for T-bones later.
257
00:10:07,374 --> 00:10:08,914
Tonight?
258
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:09,982
Oh, 'cause I'm not
doing anything.
259
00:10:10,010 --> 00:10:11,950
You know, I look at this guy
260
00:10:11,978 --> 00:10:14,948
and I can't help but
think about that saying,
261
00:10:14,981 --> 00:10:17,751
you hang around with
chickens, you cluck.
262
00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:20,754
You hang around with
eagles, you fly.
263
00:10:22,188 --> 00:10:23,358
Yeah, I know but the main
thing with eagles though
264
00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:25,390
is that they all have
mental health problems.
265
00:10:25,425 --> 00:10:26,785
All done.
266
00:10:26,826 --> 00:10:29,926
So when is actually-
-Excuse me.
267
00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:31,203
Yeah, thank you.
268
00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:38,812
Dude, seriously, how
do you stay in shape?
269
00:10:38,838 --> 00:10:40,368
Well, I used to be a gymnast
270
00:10:40,407 --> 00:10:42,137
but I just got too big.
271
00:10:42,175 --> 00:10:43,935
Yeah, I know, me too.
272
00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:45,207
So what kind of stuff?
273
00:10:45,245 --> 00:10:47,105
I mean, can you
show me something?
274
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:47,977
It's been a while.
275
00:10:48,014 --> 00:10:48,924
Come on man.
276
00:10:48,948 --> 00:10:49,978
I'm out of practice.
277
00:10:50,016 --> 00:10:50,876
Come on.
278
00:10:50,917 --> 00:10:52,117
Oh, hej guys.
279
00:10:52,152 --> 00:10:53,092
Come on yeah!
280
00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:54,789
Okay, watch this.
281
00:10:59,259 --> 00:11:00,129
Oh!
282
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:01,830
Wow, what the fuck!
283
00:11:02,929 --> 00:11:03,799
That was great.
284
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:05,000
That was-
285
00:11:05,031 --> 00:11:06,401
Did you see that?
-Yeah, I did.
286
00:11:06,433 --> 00:11:07,433
Well, I used to do that all the
time when I was in gym club.
287
00:11:07,467 --> 00:11:09,897
What, you were a gymnast?
288
00:11:09,936 --> 00:11:11,036
Oh, it was mostly
combat rolls,
289
00:11:11,071 --> 00:11:11,911
that kind of thing.
290
00:11:11,938 --> 00:11:13,408
What's combat roll?
291
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:14,440
Oh well, hang on let me just,
292
00:11:14,474 --> 00:11:16,384
I just need a bit of space to...
293
00:11:16,409 --> 00:11:17,279
Thank you.
294
00:11:19,279 --> 00:11:20,849
It's sort of like,
295
00:11:23,983 --> 00:11:25,923
get your leg over
296
00:11:25,952 --> 00:11:27,252
sort of like this.
297
00:11:28,488 --> 00:11:30,258
You paid someone
to teach you that?
298
00:11:30,290 --> 00:11:31,120
Yeah.
299
00:11:33,126 --> 00:11:35,196
Isn't that just
a teddy bear roll?
300
00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:36,958
Yeah, combat roll.
301
00:11:36,996 --> 00:11:37,426
But we used to practice a
lot more complicated stuff
302
00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:39,234
in my bedroom.
303
00:11:39,265 --> 00:11:41,095
Like what?
304
00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:42,274
Oh, I can't really
demonstrate here
305
00:11:42,302 --> 00:11:43,142
because it's not the space,
306
00:11:43,169 --> 00:11:44,069
and it's not the height?
307
00:11:44,104 --> 00:11:44,944
For you?
308
00:11:44,971 --> 00:11:45,841
Come on.
309
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:46,442
I just can't really.
310
00:11:46,473 --> 00:11:47,943
I'm not warmed up.
311
00:11:47,974 --> 00:11:50,144
Joseph, Joseph,
Joseph, Joseph!
312
00:11:51,978 --> 00:11:52,948
Okay, okay!
313
00:11:52,979 --> 00:11:54,909
Joseph, Joseph, Joseph!
314
00:12:06,860 --> 00:12:07,490
You hungry?
315
00:12:07,527 --> 00:12:08,927
I could eat.
316
00:12:28,014 --> 00:12:29,254
Oh man!
317
00:12:30,116 --> 00:12:31,016
Yeah?
318
00:12:32,952 --> 00:12:34,492
Hey.
319
00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:36,391
Hey, what the fuck?
320
00:12:36,423 --> 00:12:38,293
Is everything okay?
321
00:12:38,324 --> 00:12:39,594
Yeah, why?
322
00:12:39,626 --> 00:12:41,426
You know I got tased, right?
323
00:12:41,461 --> 00:12:42,561
No I know that,
but what are you,
324
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:43,995
what happened?
325
00:12:45,165 --> 00:12:46,495
Just fancied a change.
326
00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:48,073
What, from man to woman?
327
00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:49,471
What'd you do to your hair?
328
00:12:49,502 --> 00:12:50,342
I wanted to make it blonde.
329
00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:51,570
No.
330
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,114
No?
331
00:12:53,139 --> 00:12:54,339
No, that would never
work with someone
332
00:12:54,374 --> 00:12:55,514
of your coloring.
333
00:12:55,542 --> 00:12:58,282
And you end up
looking like a bee.
334
00:12:58,311 --> 00:12:59,211
Buddy.
335
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:03,251
So have you,
336
00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:04,153
you're finished with Tom now.
337
00:13:04,184 --> 00:13:05,424
Is he gone back,
338
00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:06,622
where is he?
339
00:13:06,653 --> 00:13:08,363
He'll be in later
this afternoon.
340
00:13:08,388 --> 00:13:10,558
We got totally shit
faced last night.
341
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:17,299
What's up?
342
00:13:17,330 --> 00:13:18,200
Oh, nothing.
343
00:13:18,231 --> 00:13:20,471
Wait, wait a minute.
344
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:22,570
Dude, is this because of Tom?
345
00:13:22,602 --> 00:13:26,112
No.
346
00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:28,269
Listen, you need to relax
347
00:13:28,308 --> 00:13:30,278
and just be your own man.
348
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:32,010
Okay, you do you.
349
00:13:32,045 --> 00:13:33,445
That's the coolest
thing you could do.
350
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:34,310
Yeah.
351
00:13:34,347 --> 00:13:35,217
Okay?
352
00:13:35,248 --> 00:13:36,148
Yeah.
353
00:13:37,117 --> 00:13:38,447
Well yeah, just as long as
354
00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:40,115
you and I get to-
355
00:13:41,087 --> 00:13:42,057
What?
356
00:13:42,088 --> 00:13:44,288
Well, you know, remain-
357
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,464
Oh, what like this?
358
00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:48,033
Yeah.
359
00:13:48,061 --> 00:13:50,561
Yeah, no this
will never change.
360
00:13:50,597 --> 00:13:53,127
All right, thank you, good.
361
00:13:56,269 --> 00:13:57,469
So what are you doing tonight?
362
00:13:57,504 --> 00:13:58,714
Do you want to go out to
the cinema or something?
363
00:13:58,738 --> 00:14:01,268
No, I'm out again
tonight with Tom.
364
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:06,250
So when was the last
time you saw Barnaby?
365
00:14:06,279 --> 00:14:08,649
Gosh, maybe 40 years ago now.
366
00:14:10,617 --> 00:14:13,147
I still think about
him every day, though.
367
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:14,686
Can I ask,
368
00:14:14,721 --> 00:14:17,321
are you still a virgin?
369
00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:18,187
Oh, yes,
370
00:14:20,293 --> 00:14:22,233
but only fairly recently.
371
00:14:23,697 --> 00:14:28,227
And when was the last
time you washed your wig?
372
00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:29,538
It's not a wig.
373
00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:32,411
Tommy, hey.
374
00:14:38,178 --> 00:14:39,208
So listen, I was just
thinking of having
375
00:14:39,245 --> 00:14:40,245
some birthday drinks.
376
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:42,220
I can't, I'm sorry.
377
00:14:42,248 --> 00:14:43,448
No, it's not tonight.
378
00:14:43,483 --> 00:14:45,093
Sorry, I should
have been clearer.
379
00:14:45,118 --> 00:14:46,218
I know you and Jerry
got a thing tonight,
380
00:14:46,252 --> 00:14:47,222
which is fine.
381
00:14:47,253 --> 00:14:48,223
No, I just mean in general.
382
00:14:48,254 --> 00:14:49,764
I probably can't make it.
383
00:14:49,789 --> 00:14:50,689
Well, that's cool.
384
00:14:50,724 --> 00:14:52,364
That's cool.
385
00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:53,332
I'm not really flexible anyway.
386
00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:55,500
I'm booked anyway 'cause yeah.
387
00:14:55,528 --> 00:14:56,728
Just let me know.
388
00:14:56,763 --> 00:14:59,103
I am letting you know.
389
00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:00,772
I can't make it.
390
00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,300
Well, let's not
rule anything out.
391
00:15:02,335 --> 00:15:04,365
I mean it's not for
eight months, Tom.
392
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:06,114
Okay, I want you guys here.
393
00:15:06,139 --> 00:15:09,409
Here, here, here,
and here throughout.
394
00:15:09,442 --> 00:15:10,682
Got it?
395
00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:12,210
Also, I'm gonna
need you to clear
396
00:15:12,245 --> 00:15:13,705
a little more space
over here just in case
397
00:15:13,747 --> 00:15:15,747
I need to do karate.
398
00:15:15,782 --> 00:15:17,682
I had a bodyguard buddy
399
00:15:17,717 --> 00:15:20,717
who lost his job because
there wasn't enough space
400
00:15:20,754 --> 00:15:23,164
for him to do karate
at a key moment.
401
00:15:23,189 --> 00:15:24,189
All right, back up a bit.
402
00:15:24,224 --> 00:15:25,564
Little more, little more.
403
00:15:28,194 --> 00:15:30,234
Yeah, another two or three
feet, right over there.
404
00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:33,403
So, are there any areas
you'd like me to accentuate?
405
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:34,333
Oh well.
406
00:15:35,335 --> 00:15:37,365
The vicar at church,
407
00:15:37,404 --> 00:15:40,244
he always says that I
have lovely cheek bones.
408
00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:42,643
My only worry is that if
I bring those out any more,
409
00:15:42,676 --> 00:15:45,246
you're going to look like
a skull on a broomstick.
410
00:15:45,278 --> 00:15:46,178
Right.
411
00:15:47,380 --> 00:15:48,380
Cigarette?
412
00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:51,216
Yeah, all right.
413
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:07,703
Go on ahead.
414
00:16:09,736 --> 00:16:11,366
I'll have this one.
415
00:16:13,807 --> 00:16:15,407
You got a light?
416
00:16:18,211 --> 00:16:20,351
Are you still lighting
your cigarettes?
417
00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:21,580
I just chew mine.
418
00:16:50,744 --> 00:16:51,714
Lips?
419
00:16:51,745 --> 00:16:53,445
Oh, yes please.
420
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:56,220
I'd really like him
to tight up lips.
421
00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:58,219
I'd go for bright pink.
422
00:16:58,251 --> 00:16:59,851
If it's the first time
you've seen each other
423
00:16:59,886 --> 00:17:01,386
in a while,
424
00:17:01,421 --> 00:17:03,861
then you want your
lips to look like a,
425
00:17:03,890 --> 00:17:05,460
cat's butt hole.
426
00:17:05,492 --> 00:17:06,362
Oh.
427
00:17:09,262 --> 00:17:11,432
And do lots of men
find that attractive?
428
00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:12,674
No.
429
00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:14,499
But, Barnaby will.
430
00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:15,544
Let's start.
431
00:17:16,636 --> 00:17:17,496
Guest list.
432
00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:24,442
No, the whole thing
needs to be redone.
433
00:17:24,477 --> 00:17:25,647
If I can't pronounce
a last name,
434
00:17:25,679 --> 00:17:26,779
I want them off the list.
435
00:17:26,813 --> 00:17:27,783
Woo, ha, ha.
436
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:31,380
Good.
437
00:17:34,788 --> 00:17:35,688
Oh wow.
438
00:17:36,790 --> 00:17:38,360
Ow!
439
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:39,861
Did you do that
piercing yourself?
440
00:17:39,893 --> 00:17:40,793
No,
441
00:17:41,861 --> 00:17:43,601
I just slept awkwardly.
442
00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:45,830
I actually see a
bit of blood, though.
443
00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:46,825
Are you coming?
444
00:17:46,866 --> 00:17:47,726
Oh no, I think me and Tom
445
00:17:47,767 --> 00:17:48,697
are just gonna hang.
446
00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:49,695
Cool.
447
00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:52,266
No, where are you going?
448
00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:53,705
To the Barnaby Bailer thing.
449
00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:55,680
Barnaby Bailer's here?
450
00:17:55,709 --> 00:17:56,939
Politician?
451
00:17:56,976 --> 00:17:59,476
Yeah, I know, what
a fucking nickhead.
452
00:17:59,512 --> 00:18:00,812
I should go.
453
00:18:00,847 --> 00:18:01,717
Be fun.
454
00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:02,548
That's what I meant.
455
00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:03,622
Be fun.
456
00:18:03,650 --> 00:18:05,190
Should go.
457
00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:09,620
I need you in that corner.
458
00:18:11,491 --> 00:18:12,561
Bailer!
459
00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:13,462
Hi.
460
00:18:13,493 --> 00:18:14,633
Jerry Bernstein, NSA.
461
00:18:14,661 --> 00:18:16,431
We did nine 11 together.
462
00:18:16,463 --> 00:18:17,763
Can I get you a little cupcake?
463
00:18:17,797 --> 00:18:19,827
You fucking maniac?
464
00:18:19,866 --> 00:18:21,966
I'd love a glass
of milk, please.
465
00:18:22,002 --> 00:18:24,772
Right, can someone get
Barnaby a glass of milk?
466
00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:26,174
Hi, Barnaby.
467
00:18:26,206 --> 00:18:26,966
Would you mind just
taking a quick pic
468
00:18:27,007 --> 00:18:28,537
for our social media?
469
00:18:28,575 --> 00:18:29,505
No, of course not.
470
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:30,442
Would you like me in it again?
471
00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:31,407
No, of course not.
472
00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:32,614
You know, let me do this.
473
00:18:32,645 --> 00:18:34,675
I'm really good at
wildlife photography.
474
00:18:34,714 --> 00:18:35,684
How do you?
475
00:18:35,715 --> 00:18:36,575
Right.
476
00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:37,776
Okay, one, two,
477
00:18:39,219 --> 00:18:40,649
Chris, you may
wanna try to smile.
478
00:18:40,687 --> 00:18:42,487
You know just imagine
there's been an attack
479
00:18:42,522 --> 00:18:43,592
on U.S. soil.
480
00:18:46,393 --> 00:18:47,633
Still no good.
481
00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:49,200
Why don't we sex
this up a little.
482
00:18:49,229 --> 00:18:50,899
Tom, leave that, come here!
483
00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:52,500
Throw your arm
around Bailer, yeah.
484
00:18:52,532 --> 00:18:54,702
Oh this is, yeah, this
is better right away.
485
00:18:54,734 --> 00:18:55,604
Here we go.
486
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:56,595
Sorry Jerry.
487
00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:57,796
Hi, I'm Barnaby Joseph Harry.
488
00:18:57,837 --> 00:18:58,837
I'm not sure if
your concerned about
489
00:18:58,872 --> 00:18:59,912
having a natural mouth shape.
490
00:18:59,939 --> 00:19:01,239
But if you say wagamama a lot,
491
00:19:01,274 --> 00:19:02,614
it gives you a very kind of
492
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:03,682
honest look.
493
00:19:03,710 --> 00:19:04,740
Shall we try that?
494
00:19:04,778 --> 00:19:06,678
One, two, three.
495
00:19:06,713 --> 00:19:08,453
Wagamama.
496
00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:09,721
I've actually
never been to one.
497
00:19:09,749 --> 00:19:10,949
Oh, it's really great.
498
00:19:10,984 --> 00:19:11,824
The only thing is the
food always arrives
499
00:19:11,851 --> 00:19:12,521
at different times.
500
00:19:12,552 --> 00:19:13,252
Why?
501
00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:14,646
No one knows.
502
00:19:14,688 --> 00:19:15,718
Chris, take a look at this.
503
00:19:15,755 --> 00:19:16,855
I think it's terrific.
504
00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:18,560
Evelyn looks rough.
505
00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:20,862
Oh hi, Barnaby.
506
00:19:20,894 --> 00:19:22,034
How are you?
507
00:19:22,062 --> 00:19:23,602
Hi, I'm good, thanks.
508
00:19:23,630 --> 00:19:26,970
Mary Needham, we were
at Oxford together.
509
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,540
St. Johns?
510
00:19:28,568 --> 00:19:30,668
Right, are you the
one that had a stroke?
511
00:19:30,704 --> 00:19:31,974
Oh gosh, no.
512
00:19:32,005 --> 00:19:33,935
It's just make up.
513
00:19:33,973 --> 00:19:35,983
Right, lovely
to see you again.
514
00:19:36,009 --> 00:19:37,909
I'm surprised you
even remember me.
515
00:19:37,944 --> 00:19:40,014
I don't remember you.
516
00:19:40,046 --> 00:19:40,946
Okay, shall we start?
517
00:19:40,980 --> 00:19:41,950
Yes.
-Great.
518
00:19:41,981 --> 00:19:44,521
Everyone, we're gonna start.
519
00:19:44,551 --> 00:19:46,451
Just so you know
I'm gonna be up top
520
00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:48,756
in case anyone tries to poof!
521
00:19:53,960 --> 00:19:54,760
Did you see where Tom went?
522
00:19:54,794 --> 00:19:55,704
Sh!
523
00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:03,671
Right, well, hello everyone.
524
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:05,713
Thanks so much for having me.
525
00:20:05,739 --> 00:20:08,879
In an increasingly digital world
526
00:20:08,908 --> 00:20:11,748
cooperation between
intelligence agencies
527
00:20:11,778 --> 00:20:13,278
has become vital.
528
00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:17,583
And never has politics
played such an important role
529
00:20:17,617 --> 00:20:19,617
in how we view cyber security
530
00:20:19,652 --> 00:20:20,552
as a society.
531
00:20:23,056 --> 00:20:26,056
In 1997, I started
a very long journey
532
00:20:28,928 --> 00:20:30,828
together with my wife, Samantha.
533
00:20:30,864 --> 00:20:32,704
We moved into Downing Street
534
00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:35,702
with a promise to the
people of Britain.
535
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:38,936
No wait, what, what, what!
536
00:20:42,108 --> 00:20:46,048
Okay, our friends
from Greenpeace in?
537
00:20:48,815 --> 00:20:51,685
Sorry, anyways
onwards and upwards.
538
00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,522
Good.
539
00:20:54,554 --> 00:20:57,864
Either we treat hacking
offenses as serious crimes or
540
00:21:00,660 --> 00:21:03,660
or face the consequences of...
541
00:21:03,697 --> 00:21:06,867
Has someone hacked the system?
542
00:21:06,900 --> 00:21:08,670
I expected better than
this, to be honest.
543
00:21:11,071 --> 00:21:14,011
Excellent, now it's
all over Twitter.
544
00:21:15,041 --> 00:21:16,811
Anyone know who's responsible?
545
00:21:16,843 --> 00:21:17,983
I must say I'm looking forward
546
00:21:18,011 --> 00:21:19,881
to explaining to
Rupert which one of us
547
00:21:19,913 --> 00:21:24,023
decided to invite a random
hacker into the building.
548
00:21:24,050 --> 00:21:25,890
Go ahead, there's nothing here
549
00:21:25,919 --> 00:21:27,989
that says this was
the work of Tom.
550
00:21:28,021 --> 00:21:29,121
Let's get this sorted.
551
00:21:37,030 --> 00:21:38,000
Could be a different Tom.
552
00:21:38,031 --> 00:21:40,871
Oh my God.
553
00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:45,010
* This is Ground
Control to Major Tom *
554
00:21:45,038 --> 00:21:49,978
* You've really made the grade
555
00:21:50,010 --> 00:21:54,010
* And the papers want to
know whose shirts you wear *
556
00:21:54,047 --> 00:21:55,417
Wanna go get some T-bones?
557
00:21:55,448 --> 00:21:57,078
Yeah.
558
00:21:57,117 --> 00:22:01,787
* Now it's time to leave
the capsule if you dare *
559
00:22:12,832 --> 00:22:13,772
Very nice.
560
00:22:14,734 --> 00:22:15,874
Cat bum.
561
00:22:15,902 --> 00:22:17,072
Oh, thank you.
562
00:22:25,679 --> 00:22:27,709
* Hooray hooray hooray
563
00:22:27,747 --> 00:22:29,447
* Misery is on the way
564
00:22:29,482 --> 00:22:30,782
* There are bad times
565
00:22:30,817 --> 00:22:33,117
* Just around the corner
566
00:22:33,153 --> 00:22:34,653
* There are dark clouds
567
00:22:34,688 --> 00:22:37,058
* Hurtling through the sky
568
00:22:37,090 --> 00:22:39,060
* It's as clear as crystal
569
00:22:39,092 --> 00:22:41,092
* From Bridlington to Bristol
570
00:22:41,127 --> 00:22:43,057
* That we can't save democracy
571
00:22:43,096 --> 00:22:44,956
* And we don't much care
572
00:22:44,998 --> 00:22:46,828
* We better all
learn the merits *
573
00:22:46,866 --> 00:22:48,966
* On the old red flag
574
00:22:49,002 --> 00:22:53,612
* And wait till we
drop down dead *
575
00:22:56,612 --> 00:23:00,612
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