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There's still time

to get your picture taken with Santa Claus

just in time for Christmas.

Ho ho ho ho!

Gang, it's Christmas Eve.

Let's just squeeze in one more practice.

Mom, again?

Yes, again.

Okay, from the top.

You're being a classic dork.

Just finish the song...

Come on, people, we're losing focus here.

Well, as much as I hate to be the one to break up the party,

I have a sick parakeet to attend to.

I have to zoom into work.

Zoom? No more tickets like last week, please, honey.

Honey, those people were driving too slow.

Besides, how else would we have met the Gundersons?

I'm just sorry you have to work Christmas Eve, that's all.

I know.

But tomorrow, I'm all yours.

These extra hours are just temporary,

just until I find a new job.

Hey, you know what the silver lining is?

I have all this extra time, I can organize.

I've already organized the DVDs by color this time.

Color?

Color Purple, Purple Rose of Cairo, Purple Rain, Pur...

What are you doing?

Adding "organize DVDs" to my to-do list.

Hey, everything's gonna be fine,

just as long as life doesn't throw us any more curveballs.

I'll get it.

Ho ho ho!

Why are you wasting electricity with an electric Santa?

- Dad? - Grab my bag.

I got a hernia.

Uh...

Would I be allowed in?

Yeah, yeah, come on in.

It's great. Honey!

What is he doing here?

I didn't know he was coming.

He never comes for Christmas.

Okay, put him in Kenny's room, and Kenny can sleep with Pete.

He's not sleeping with me. He wets the bed.

Nonsense. He's fine as long as he doesn't drink anything.

Ahh!

Hey, bunkmate.

Nothing stops the Red Liner Express

from its 7:35 AM departure.

You kept me up till 2 AM snoring.

Adenoids are a serious condition.

Well, at least you didn't...

Oh, man, you wet the bed.

I believe you're engaging

in what's commonly known as projection,

and I would submit that that pee is, in fact, yours.

Are you kidding me?

Ow!

Oh, you still stink at football!

I hate to break it to you guys,

but last night, I ate most of the pancake mix,

so I hope you guys like stale toast,

'cause I'm getting there first.

It's Christmas morning.

"Early bird gets the worm" in Latin.

Ho ho ho ho!

Good morning, sunshine.

Go get Grandpa and we'll open presents.

And put on something nice.

It's Christmas.

Hey, Grandpa, Mom wants us all downstairs.

You don't know what knocking is?

What do you got to say for yourself?

Don't shoot the messenger?

Did you get this tree right out of a box?

It has sentimental value, you know?

You are a softie, Pamela, just like my kid.

Thank you.

That's not a compliment.

Okay, then.

Jake, you go first.

Yeah.

Shocking.

Let's see what we got here.

"To Jake, from Santa."

Over here, over here!

No, wait, wait.

Get my good side.

Wait. Never mind.

They're both my good side.

Just get in one more?

Little to the left. There.

I realize star athletes are known for their victory dances,

but must you do them for everything?

My crumpets are ready.

- Really? - Okay, who's next?

- Me, me, me! - Okay, go, go!

- Delightful. - A telescope?

And good timing.

That's what I wanted.

Cassiopeia should be in fine form this week.

Hey, Mom, can I eat all the crumpets?

I want crumpets!

Better be another telescope under there.

Uh, hey, I don't see my name tag.

Hey, you're gonna love it, okay?

Santa got you something great this year.

- What? - Right, honey?

What... Why are you looking at me?

You... You were supposed to talk to Santa.

Uh, no, no. I specifically remembered

asking you to speak to Santa when you...

- No. - Yes.

No, no, no. You didn't. You were telling...

Santa forgot my Christmas gift?

No, no, no. No, no.

Look, you're just tricky to buy gifts for, that's all.

You've tried karate, trumpet, tennis, painting, guitar.

It's hard to keep up with what you want sometimes.

Oh, Pete, Pete, we're so sorry.

We're sorry, buddy.

We're so sorry.

We're gonna fix this as soon as possible.

Hold on a second.

Dr. Kidder.

Are her feathers intact?

Well, you know...

Ah, wait! Do not plug in anything when the tree's on.

The circuits are already overloaded, okay?

Hon, I'm gonna start the beef Wellington.

Wellington? Wow, that sounds ambitious.

Apparently, all you do is coat a beef tenderloin in pat,

wrap it in crepe to keep it moist,

roll it in puff pastry, and cook.

Easy-peasy.

No. I'm just thinking it might be easier this year

to do something simple like do a turkey?

Okay, just because I have to work today

doesn't mean I am not gonna try to make this Christmas special.

Okay.

This tree looks kind of bare without the star on the top.

I just didn't get the...

Your Grandma used to put our happiest photos

on this Christmas star decoration she made, and, uh...

I would sit there looking up at the tree on Christmas morning.

Yeah, that was the most wonderful thing

about Christmas morning.

Yeah.

Then somebody broke it.

Hmm.

Be right back.

Pete, it's the last one, so Merry Christmas.

Thanks.

Yeah, it fell in the toilet.

No present.

It's officially the worst Christmas ever.

Pete.

Look, uh, I'm sorry.

I'll make this right.

Dad, I wanted the telescope.

Dad, it's perfect.

The Leonid meteor shower's next week,

and there's an eclipse next month

at 43 degrees ascendancy in the western sky.

Wow. You sure know your eclipses.

You know something?

There's a book I think you might want to have a look at here.

Hey, Crazy Legs Kenny, want to play catch?

- Sure. Let me get my coat. - All right, buddy.

What about me?

Yeah, no, no.

Okay, buddy, today I'm gonna teach you how to spiral, okay?

Cool. That sounds neat.

Come on, snap out of it!

No long faces.

I asked for one thing... one...

And I got nothing.

Well, the same thing happened to me,

just about the same age you are right now.

You got nothing for Christmas?

Nothing, zip.

You'll get over it.

Come on. Buck up, Kenny.

I'm Pete.

- Hey, Kidder! - Think fast!

Better get used to the taste of ice!

Ah!

I'm blind!

See you at football.

We're coming' for you, Kidder!

You better run!

No! No! No!

- Aah! - Aah!

Oh, Pete, you're on chopping duty.

I just had a very traumatic incident.

It looks like there are lights on at the neighbors',

and I saw a car in the driveway.

Well, new neighbors means an introduction is in order,

and I know the perfect way.

The Kidder family is gonna keep its Christmas traditions

or die trying.

Please don't say...

Time for caroling!

Let's go!

Where'd you get these sweaters?

Wow, you actually like something that I made?

Not really.

I just wanted to know where I'd take it back.

Come on, Dad. They're not so bad.

The rash is much worse.

I can't wait.

Hello. We are the Kidder family.

We live next door,

and we wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood.

Gang?

Pete, sing.

Sing, dork boy!

Um...

Can we go now?

Yep. Excuse us. Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

- Let's go. - We're done.

Hey, Dad said not to mess with that

while the tree's plugged in.

What are you, the plug police?

Seriously, I mean, you have to unplug

the lights from the tree, or it'll overload.

- I'll do it. - Hurry up.

I have a Sky I ander playoff with Kenny.

Come on.

I'm trying.

Forget it.

Oh! Ah!

What happened?

Uh, ask Pete. It was totally his fault.

Jake, Pete's not here.

Actually, I am.

Oh, my goodness!

Hey, Pete, what did you do?

I didn't do anything! Tell him, Jake.

Nah, he totally did it.

Pete broke my telescope?

I didn't break it.

I tried to save it.

You broke it!

No, I didn't!

- Guys! - Yes, you did!

- Guys! Guys! - No, I didn't!

Ooh!

Now I did.

Pete, go to your room.

Go.

It's not like Pete to do this.

Well, at least my dad isn't here to witness this mess

and to judge us for...

Oh, wait. He is.

I'm sorry that Christmas is going off the rails.

- Oh. - Here.

Merry Christmas.

It's dancing lessons again.

I thought maybe this year, we'd actually finish them.

Hey, the 15 minutes we made it to last year were terrific.

Oh.

It's the Bronskis.

All set for the big game.

It would not be Christmas Day without the annual football game.

Let's tango outta here.

Uh...

Okay, well, maybe this year, we'll learn the rest of the steps.

Yeah. Okay.

Snow on the trees.

No dorks allowed!

Frozen field.

This seems like the perfect opportunity

for me to freeze my hiney off.

It's a Christmas Day tradition.

Every year, the Bronskis crush us in football.

Hey, Pete!

You better wear your mouth guard.

Let's go, Bronskis!

Let's go, Bronskis!

Blue 42, set.

Here! I'm open!

I'm open! Right here!

Yeah!

Whoo!

- Yeah! - Whoo!

- Oh! - Bronskis!

That feels so good.

What are you waiting for?

Pete, pick up the ball!

- Ah ah ah! - Hurry up! Come on!

Hurry!

Bronski!

I'm open, I'm open!

Ooh!

I admired the way you mopped up your own blood

after the Bronskis cleaned your clock.

Thanks.

Why are you smiling?

'Cause I bet against you.

Bye, guys. Drive safe. Safe drive home.

Actually, you know what? Now I feel bad. Here.

Oh. Thank you.

Yeah, right.

- Good one. - Thank you.

Hey, guys, great news.

The German shepherd's gonna make it.

That makes one of us.

What's wrong?

Another catastroPete.

- He threw the winning pass. - That's great.

To the other team.

Oh, Pete!

I'll come in and we can talk about it.

As soon as I check that dinner.

It's raw.

No. No, no, no.

The recipe said 300 for two hours.

Did you reset the oven after the power went out?

What? No.

So no Christmas dinner?

Way to go, dufus!

This family sure knows how to throw a Christmas...

right in the toilet.

I don't know why you had to make dinner so complicated anyway.

Well, I... I was just trying to make Christmas memorable.

Memorable, just like the Titanic.

Let's just... Can we put it in the microwave?

Does that work? Does it fit?

Just put that... Put that down!

So what are we gonna eat then?

Hey, out in Christmas land,

you're listening to the best station in the city.

Don't touch that dial.

We have your favorite Christmas classics all night long.

Don't forget to look out your window

for tonight's meteor shower.

And if you're lucky, you may spot Santa, too.

106.5, the station that makes you want to listen.

Smells good.

Mmm.

Hey, guys, hey.

We may not have a home-cooked meal,

but we can be thankful for other things we do have, right?

We're together, we're healthy.

And with time off, I can spend more time with you guys.

That's what you guys are calling getting fired now?

Time off?

I wasn't fired.

I was downsized, and it's temporary.

What?

Nothing, except if you'd have gone to law school like I did,

then you wouldn't be a professionless hobo.

Well, I have a profession.

- I'm an advertising executive. - Oh.

I analyze customer needs,

and I help companies craft messages

that drive consumer demand, so...

But it's actually just a fancy way of saying

that you sell snow boots to dogs.

I was assigned that account,

and I made the most of what I got,

which is more than I can say for you.

What's that mean, son?

- I don't know. - Wow, this is delicious.

Maybe we should have cheeseburgers every Christmas.

Tastes a little bit worse than my old wingtips.

Lousy food, everybody's mad.

Thanks a lot, Pete.

You're blaming me.

There was an irrefutable chain of events.

You shorted the power, which ruined the meal,

and that's why we're here for dinner.

Dinner? Your brother's eating a hot dog.

You call that Christmas dinner?

No, I don't,

but this is the best we can do on Christmas Day.

So everyone is just gonna eat their meal

and be grateful for Christmas dinner.

Go Christmas or go home.

Could this day get any worse?

Oh, no.

- Oh! - Oh!

I just puked again.

The whole family got food poisoning because of you.

Thanks a lot, dorkwad.

I'm keeping this.

It's mine now.

Hey, bud.

Unh! Whoa.

Coming through.

My favorite shirt.

Oh, honey, it'll smell great...

once we bury it in the backyard.

Mom...

And, Pete, I know it's hard being the middle child,

but we'll start fresh again tomorrow.

Merry Christmas.

You don't have to sleep with your brother anymore.

I'm leaving.

Clearly, I'm not wanted here.

Oh, I forgot.

Um... I got something for you.

Here.

Remember that lousy Christmas I told you about?

When my Uncle Charlie came from old country?

He said there was something special about this.

And when the time came,

I was supposed to pass it on to someone else in the family.

What's so special about an empty box?

I don't know.

I'm just doing what I promised,

passing it on.

Maybe you'll figure it out.

What are you doing?

What are you surprised for?

There's nothing for me here.

You came here. I mean...

Dad, what are you doing? You just got here.

Come on, I know when I'm not wanted.

Thanks for nothing.

Nothing stops the Red Liner Express

from its 7:35 AM departure.

Um, what are you doing in my room?

Grandpa's in my room, sleepyhead.

He left.

Oh! Oh, you wet the bed again.

I believe you're engaging

in what's commonly known as projection,

and I would submit that that pee is, in fact, yours.

Ow!

Ooh, you still stink at football!

Well, last night, I ate most of the pancake mix,

so I hope you guys like stale toast.

It's Christmas morning.

"Early bird gets the worm" in Latin.

Good morning, sunshine.

Go get Grandpa and we'll open presents.

- And put on something nice. - Very funny.

- It's Christmas. - Grandpa's not in Kenny's room.

Grandpa?

What about knocking?

I thought you left.

What's that? Knocking.

Did you get this tree right out of a box?

It has sentimental value, you know?

Um, is this supposed to be funny,

having Christmas again?

I mean, yesterday was the worst Christmas ever.

Do you have a fever, Pete?

Honey, want to go check and see if Pete has a fever?

Fever?

Here, let me feel your forehead.

Nope, it's not hot.

Presents! Jake, you go first.

Yes! All right, let's see what we got here.

"To Jake, from Santa."

What have we got here?

Yes!

My crumpets are ready.

Okay, um...

great joke, recreating the worst Christmas ever.

Okay, I get it.

The tree fell down, Grandpa left angry,

dinner was an epic fail,

but just consider me punished, okay?

Did he fall and hit his head?

His head looks a little misshapen today.

Of course not.

Did you, Pete?

Look, I didn't hit my head.

I had Christmas yesterday. Don't you...

Oh, you fixed the glass while I was asleep.

Nice touch.

Okay, let's get Pete's present.

All right.

Oh, that's what this is about.

Okay, I'm ready for my present.

Okay.

- Okay. - Right?

- Pete's present. - Yeah.

You...

You?

Uh...

Santa forgot my present... again?

- Oh, honey... - Uh...

Oh, we're so sorry.

So just 'cause I messed up,

you make me go through this all over again?

Look, we're not doing anything, Pete.

Okay, you're really starting to worry me.

Buddy, maybe you want to go back to bed.

Thanks.

Hey, Kidder!

Even the Bronskis are in on this?

- Think fast! - Oh!

Impossible!

As impossible as your... face!

Ha! Yeah!

That doesn't even make any sense!

- Yeah, it does. - Yeah.

Oh! Oh!

We're coming' for you, Kidder!

You better run!

Not again, not again.

Oh, my... Come on. Why?

Aah!

Aah!

Oh, Pete, you're on chopping duty.

I just had a very traumatic incident and...

Honey, there are lights on at the neighbors'.

I saw a car in the driveway.

Well, new neighbors means an introduction's in order,

and I know the perfect way.

Let's go, Bronskis!

- What are you waiting for? - Here we go!

It's raw.

- So what are we gonna eat then? - Oh, no.

Oh!

What are you doing? You just got here.

Come on, I know when I'm not wanted.

Nothing stops the Red Liner Express from its 7:35 AM...

Ho ho ho ho!

Did you get this tree right out of a box?

It has sentimental value, you know?

Okay, now you're just messing with me.

I get it. I ruined Christmas.

I'm sorry, okay?

Okay, I got dinner in the oven.

Now what's going on with you, Pete?

Are you okay?

Does insanity fall into the okay category?

Honey, I know that things have been rough lately,

and we haven't been able to spend as much time together.

That's not it, Mom.

Then what is it, honey?

We did all this already.

Everything that's happening today has already happened before.

Oh, that's just dajeo vu,

that feeling like, "I've been here before,"

but really you haven't.

Well, then what's that feeling when today

is exactly like yesterday, when nothing has changed,

and you feel like you're going completely nuts?

I call that working for a living.

Come on. I know what you need.

You need to get outside, you need to get some fresh air.

Build a snowman.

Mom, look, I really appreciate the trademark positive attitude,

but this is one thing fresh air is not gonna fix.

Did we just lose power?

No. Jake plugged in his video game when the tree was on.

It shorted the fuse.

Jake!

No.

I'm stuck in Christmas!

Ho ho ho ho ho!

Ho ho ho!

Ho ho ho! Ho ho ho!

Nothing stops the Red Liner Express

from its 7:35 AM departure.

Why is this happening to me?

You still stink at football!

Hey, you been in your room all day.

I want to give you this.

Oh, right, the box. No, thanks.

Take it. You'll figure it out.

Thanks for nothing.

No, no blows to the head,

unless a snowball counts.

Okay, everyone seems fine, so the hallucinations

probably aren't from food poisoning.

It's not that, no.

No.

Pee.

I know, I know. Nothing stops the Red Liner Express

from its 7:35 AM departure.

Yeah, yeah!

Now you caught me all misty.

Honestly, I've got bigger things to worry about.

Mom wants us downstairs.

Another Christmas Day!

- Unbelievable! - Pete?

Oh, just go back to your business.

Don't worry about me.

Kenny will get the telescope I asked for.

Jake will get a football, then he'll ask Kenny to throw it around,

and he'll blow the fuse,

and yet, somehow, I will get blamed like always.

- Honey... - Then we're gonna get food poisoning,

and Dad will argue with Grandpa,

and then get Grandpa really mad so he leaves.

Oh, wait. It gets better.

Then, tomorrow, we'll do it all again!

Everything!

He is an interesting kid.

Totally nuts, but very interesting.

Why am I the only one that can remember anything?

- Hey, Kidder! - Oh, wait.

- Think fast! - Oh!

Yeah! Whoo!

Bronskis!

We're coming' for you, Kidder!

You better run!

Not this time.

I got you figured out.

You can't hurt me anymore.

Yes!

Whoo!

Hello!

Hi.

Um, are you okay?

Who, me?

Yeah, I'm more than okay.

Uh, my pants aren't ripped.

Well, celebrate the small things in life, right?

I'm Katie.

Merry, merry Christmas.

That's one too many merries.

But a lot of things have been repeating these days.

So, you just moved in?

Yeah. Yeah, from Wisconsin

just in time for Christmas.

Well, sorry about the caroling.

My mom takes it pretty seriously.

You've been caroling at our house?

O h, wi Il...

will carol at your house,

in like, yeah, 23 minutes.

Oh, that's perfect.

My mom and I just baked a ton of Christmas cookies,

and we've got nobody to give them to.

Well, uh, I'll see you in a bit.

Think I'm due for a tree crash power outage.

That is an odd family tradition.

Yeah. Maybe I'll skip it this time.

Whoa!

What happened?

Um, ask Pete.

Did you do this?

No, actually, I was watching it all happen

from start to finish outside.

I even took this on my phone.

Oh, my goodness! What is it now?

So you watched all this happen?

You took the time to record it? You didn't help?

Yeah. Yeah, why didn't you help?

Dad, that's not the point.

I had nothing to do with this.

Pete, what is wrong today?

Why won't you tell us what's going on with you?

There's just no winning here.

How's about a little help here?

Oh! Oh!

Where's my crossword?

It's not like Pete to do this.

It's a fiasco. My dad's here.

Look, I'm sorry this Christmas is going off the rails.

Maybe this will make up for it.

Merry Christmas.

It's dancing lessons...

same as last year.

Hey, now nice. Dance lessons.

You guys have fun while your son's stuck in a repeating day.

Well, that kind of shattered our moment.

Uh, perfect.

The football game is on.

You call it football. I call it torture.

- Have fun. - Yeah.

You know what you witnessed this morning?

Can we keep that just between us?

Is that fair?

Does everyone get grumpy when they become a grandpa?

Well, you just don't get grumpy.

You gotta work at it.

Takes time, like making a fine wine.

You gotta bottle it up,

let it sit for a couple of decades,

and then, oh, boy,

then you can uncork some vintage grumps,

some downtown grumps.

Hey, uh, Grandpa, can you keep a secret?

Sure.

What would you do if you were cursed

to live the same day over and over again?

That's not a curse.

Sounds to me like a gift.

A gift?

Repeating the same day over and over?

Well, you get to live consequence-free.

Wake up with a clean slate every morning,

even though the night before,

you punched some turd in the nose?

Sounds like a hoot to me.

Never thought about it like that.

Hey!

You were passing me the ball.

No, no, no. You were passing me the ball.

Ohh!

Maybe it's time to turn the tables.

- Let's go, Bronskis! - All right, here we go, now.

All right, let's go! All right!

Come on, now!

Blue 42, set, hut!

I'm open!

Jake, I'm open!

Kidder!

Aah!

Ooh!

Ooh!

Ha ha! That's what I'm talking about!

What are you doing?

Unsportsmanlike conduct! You're benched!

What? But it was a preemptive strike!

They were gonna smash me in ten seconds!

You got exactly ten seconds to hit the bench.

Move it!

You got sauce, kid.

You bet against me.

A friendly wager with neighbors.

You know what part I liked best?

When you didn't let the two big oafs intimidate you.

Us underdogs, we gotta strike back.

Strike back.

I like the sound of that.

You! Laundry now!

Um, I don't see my name on any tags.

- Keep looking. - Uh...

A football?

- What? - Um...

That's what I wanted.

Well, how do you like that?

This is just what I wanted.

So what did I get for Christmas?

- Oh... - Uh...

Oh, Jake, we're so sorry.

Yeah, um...

Are you kidding me? Santa forgot about my present?

- No. - No?

No, he didn't.

You said he was in there!

This is his house, isn't it?

- Yeah. - Is it?

- Yeah, this is... - You told me that.

- Hey, Bronskis! - How am I supposed to know?

- Think fast! - Ow!

Hey!

Pete said you needed help with the crossword puzzle?

I do?

Hi, I'm Katie.

Hey, neighbor. I'm Pete,

and I'd say you're a cheesehead.

What did you call me?

Hi, I'm Katie.

- Go Badgers! - What are you talking about?

- Go Bears? - No.

Pfft!

Hi, I'm Katie.

'Sup, girl? Hmm!

Just... Just no.

What up, girl? Uh!

Where is he?

I don't know.

You said he would be here.

No, I didn't. You said he would be here.

Ho ho ho ho ho!

Did you reset the oven after the power went out?

What? No.

So no Christmas dinner?

Thanks a lot, dufus.

I don't know why you had to make dinner so complicated.

It's not.

And that would be dinner.

Looks a little small.

I do have a high metabolism.

Nice.

All right, let's go!

Let's go, Bronskis!

Come on, now!

Blue 42, set, hut!

Here we go! Over here!

Jake, I'm open! Right here!

One Mississippi, two Mississippi.

Kidder!

Ohh!

You sure you want to do this?

I mean, the dabbler shouldn't mess with the king.

Last time, you quit after, like, twenty minutes.

Yeah, well, maybe 'cause you were being such a competitive jerk.

Okay, you know what? I don't have time for remedial football.

- I should go practice. - Whoa!

I've been practicing, yeah.

I might even be better than you now.

Really? So you want to get humiliated.

All right, fine.

Let's do it.

- You ready? - For anything you've got.

Oof!

I'm open! I'm open!

One Mississippi, two Mississippi.

Er-aah!

Wait for it.

Yeah!

Go, 88!

I did it! Yeah!

Yeah!

There's no way we lost. We're the Bronskis.

Pieces of green. Thank you, shorty.

That was fifteen from you, five from you,

ten from you, ten from you.

That's right. Thank you, ma'am.

Twenty from you.

How'd we do?

Look here. That's how we did.

You did wonderful. You were great.

Thanks. You know, I feel like celebrating.

I'm game for that.

I don't know.

Hey, Bronskis!

Think fast!

- Ooh! Ah! - Ooh!

Okay, you go first.

One, two, three.

Nnn.

Uh... uh.

On three, all right? On three?

- Both? - Yeah, yeah, both of us on three.

One, two, three.

Unh!

Hey, Bronskis!

Draw!

Oh!

Yes! Yes!

It was funny, come on.

Get it off.

Are you sure this is supposed to be fun?

Yeah.

Oh, man.

Come on, put your back into it.

Like little windshield wipers.

Go fast as I am.

Ready? Go. Do it fast.

Well...

Fast, not molasses.

I'm glad Mr. Schultz could be persuaded to open his store today.

Well, you got style, kid.

Hey, uh, hit me again.

Sure thing, kid.

You know, when I first started hanging out with you,

I was concerned you might be a bit of a whiner.

But you know what?

You became a real tough guy.

Takes one to know one.

Tell me that story again when you were in the Navy.

When you short-sheeted the admiral's bed?

How do you know that story?

I must be losing my memory.

Sundae number twelve.

Thanks.

You know something?

This day, today, may be the best day

I have had in a long, long time.

You know why?

And not because of this.

But because we swapped stories and laughed.

Can I ask you something?

Whatever.

Why'd you decide to come to Christmas this year?

Well, I got my reasons.

It's what your grandmother would have wanted.

I was worried that...

I might get the cold shoulder.

And instead...

I got hot fudge.

Cheers.

You got it, son.

Hey, neighbor. I'm Pete.

I'm Katie.

The great state of Wisconsin

is the number one manufacturer of sharp cheddar cheese

with 143 million pounds a year,

but I bet blue cheese is actually your favorite.

Wow. How do you know all that?

Oh, I've got a sense about people.

Well, nice... nice to meet you.

Are you having a good Christmas?

A merry, merry Christmas, actually.

That's funny. That's my expression.

Well, it cheers Mom up anyway.

What about your dad?

Ahem. Uh...

he's not here right now.

Yeah, well, my family's mostly out to lunch, too.

Grandpa's pretty cool,

but the only problem is he doesn't remember

what happens one day to the next.

Yeah. Yeah, I've got a grandpa like that, too.

No, it's not what you think.

So what's your favorite Christmas carol?

Jing I e Be Il s.

But why do you ask?

No reason.

Ha ha ha!

This is my favorite carol.

Mine, too.

- Really? - Yeah.

Revenge is sweet.

Too sweet.

I think I'm gonna puke.

Hey, sweetie, how you doing?

Oh, please don't say that word... sweetie.

My stomach hurts enough already.

Uh, well, no wonder. Look at all this stuff.

Where did you get all this money?

Oh, Grandpa won it by betting on me at the game.

Take as much as you want,

but just remember to spend it before midnight.

Okay, no more betting.

And, Pete, Dad and I are really proud of you

for winning the game,

but you and Grandpa mooning the other team?

No one likes a show-off.

Come on, Dad! What are you doing?

You just got here!

Come on, I know when I'm not wanted.

Well, there's the sound of Grandpa leaving...

again.

It's futile.

Just like the house.

You clean it up, mess it up, clean it up.

What's the difference?

It'll just be a mess again soon.

You're awfully philosophical tonight.

It's a very strange Christmas we've been having.

But tomorrow's a new day.

Don't count on it.

Are you putting designer sunglasses on a snowman?

Yeah. I won them from somebody at the game.

You like?

I guess.

Looks like somebody's had an excellent Christmas.

Not exactly.

I've been doing everything I want every day,

but, somehow, everything doesn't feel

as great as it should feel.

Could I ask your advice on something serious?

Sure.

Okay. What would you do if you had to relive

the same day over and over again?

What wouldn't I do?

I mean, anything, everything.

It's not all it's cracked up to be.

Are you telling me that you keep on reliving Christmas

over and over and over?

Yeah.

Look, I know it sounds crazy,

but it's true, and it never ends.

But that's great.

I mean, the thing that's so amazing about Christmas

is it forces you to slow down and look up

if only for a single day.

For me, it's like a lousy gift I keep getting again and again,

and it's getting old.

Come on, Dad! What are you doing?

You just got here!

Come on, I know when I'm not wanted.

You're really leaving?

Yes, sir.

I came here to reconnect.

It's just turned into closing arguments.

Your parents certainly do not want me here,

but that's my fault.

But, Grandpa, you're the coolest.

But you're the only one that thinks so.

I strived all my life for more...

More money, more success.

And maybe I took the most important things in life for granted,

but life doesn't give you a second chance.

I had a second chance.

I screwed it up,

and if you ever get a second chance

to do the right thing, then you grab it!

And for goodness sake, hold onto it with both hands.

Look, I think you're looking at it the wrong way.

How's that?

Well, if I had a chance to relive Christmas

over and over again...

I know I would only want one present.

What?

Nothing.

Nothing.

Seriously?

I mean, not a thing.

No thing.

I would just want to spend one more day

with all my family together...

before my dad passed away.

But... But I thought...

I usually just tell people that he's traveling.

It's just easier sometimes.

I'm really sorry, Katie.

Me, too.

But thanks.

But, um...

if what you're telling me is true and you're not pulling my leg,

which I'm sure you are...

then I've got some advice for you.

What?

Appreciate what you have.

Do the things you never thought you could.

And use your gift for good.

Nothing stops the Red Liner Express

from its 7:35 AM departure.

- 7:35 AM. - Yeah.

And you also wet my bed.

Oh, you still stink at football!

What in the world?

Do you know what time it is?

Yeah, time for me to practice.

Oh, you still stink at football!

Sorry.?

Merry, merry Christmas.

Merry, merry Christmas, Pete.

It's not like Pete to do that.

I know, with my dad here?

Since when does this kid get up early

and make us chocolate waffles?

Did we tell him that we had chocolate waffles on our honeymoon?

Sounds like Pete's put on some tunes.

Well, it's perfect timing, because...

Uh, Merry Christmas. That's your present.

It's dancing lessons again.

Maybe this year, we'll find time to go.

Dancing at Christmas?

Takes me back.

Remember that first Christmas when we were dating?

Ah, when you got the Christmas parade

to make a detour to my house?

Hole in the roof?

Fake snow for atmosphere.

Just keep dancing.

Ho ho ho ho!

Ho ho ho ho ho!

Listen, Pete, I am so, so sorry

we forgot to talk to Santa about your present.

It's okay, Mom.

I know you're juggling a lot.

Listen, there's one Christmas tradition we haven't done yet.

Let's do it, you and me.

Oh, in all the hubbub,

I forgot about our taffy-making tradition.

I think we should have stuck with the old recipe.

Come on. If this recipe is good enough

the fine folks took the time to upload it to the internet,

then it's good enough for us.

- I can't move my hands. You? - Nope.

Uh, Mom, you're making it worse.

Help!

Anyone? A little help here?

Okay, I guess we have to wait for the rescue party.

Mom, remember when I was nine and I ran away

'cause you said I was too young to watch the midnight movie?

Mm-hmm.

How long was it till anyone noticed?

I noticed.

I was behind you in the car the whole time

you were trudging down the road to the bus stop.

Really?

I felt so independent when I decided to come back home.

Well, you decided on your own that running away was silly.

I was just hedging my bets

in case the idea didn't sink in fast enough.

Hey, Pete, I know it's hard being the middle child.

You know, you got your older brother

with the age advantage over you,

and the younger one, who sucks up all the attention.

But you're finding your way.

You think Grandpa and Dad will ever stop arguing?

Honey, sometimes in life things just are the way they are,

and try as you might, there's nothing you can do to change it,

no matter how much you might like to.

It's not good enough.

Well, sometimes life surprises you when you least expect it.

Okay.

Oh, finally.

Wait. You're not just gonna abandon me here, are you?

My nose itches.

- Oh. - There you go.

Thanks, honey.

Mmm.

You actually call these sweaters?

I know they're a tad itchy,

but Mom went through a knitting phase,

and they are Christmassy.

Christmassy? Oh, boy.

Merry Christmas, Josephine!

- Hello. - Hi, Josephine.

May I help you?

Only if you like caroling.

Oh, that's wonderful!

Just wonderful!

You know, I'm all alone this Christmas,

and you've... you've made me very, very happy.

Thank you.

I'll just get you some treats.

Please, playing for you was the only treat we really need.

Right, Grandpa?

Yeah. I mean, we may look like ding-dongs,

but we do enjoy spreading Christmas cheer.

- Hello. - Hello.

We are the Kidder family from next door,

and we wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood.

- Wow! - Nice one, Pete!

- I can't believe it. - That's great.

When did he learn to play like that?

Well, let's hurry up.

We got, like, ten more houses to hit before football.

Pete, since when did you learn to play the guitar?

Yesterday.

He has my genes.

Pete, you brought a mascot?

Yeah. You know, I thought he'd cheer you up

after the Kidders demolish you on the field.

Ooh!

When pigs fly!

Sorry. I'm not inventing pork wings until tomorrow.

Yeah!

Let's go, Kidders!

Let's go, Kidders!

Blue 42, set, hut!

Here we go!

Jake, I'm open! Right here!

We're gonna get you, Kidder!

One, Mississippi. Two, Mississippi.

Aah!

Yeah! Yeah!

Yeah!

Yahoo!

The mascot!

It was the mascot.

Thank you! Thank you!

Oh, yeah! Thank you!

Jake, what's wrong?

I don't know. I'm just not feeling the game this year.

When did you get so good?

Benefit of being the overlooked middle child.

You get a lot of free time on your hands.

All those times you never asked me?

Guess I really can play.

Yeah, that makes one of us.

Look, I don't get it.

You live for football.

I mean, I just scored the winning touchdown and we won.

Why are you so upset?

I got benched from the school team, okay?

You?

Yeah.

How is that possible?

Apparently, my passes are off,

and the coach thinks that I cost us the last two games,

so he took me off first string.

Well, you just got to get your confidence back.

You know, get back on that football horse.

Get back on the what?

The football horse.

You're such a weirdo.

Hey, Pete, you brought a mascot?

To cheer you up after the we win.

- Yeah, when pigs... - Fly.

Yeah, yeah, got it. Thanks.

Are those Bronskis?

Hey, Jake, next play, I'm gonna set you up for a winning pass.

What are you talking about?

Just trust me, okay?

They're gonna try to sack you,

so I'm gonna set you up for a winning lateral.

Are you psychic?

Just be ready.

Blue 42, set!

Let's go, Kidders!

I'm open!

What are you waiting for?

Go! Go!

Yeah! Nice job, Jake!

Look at that! How about that?

Hey!

What did I tell you?

You're back on the football horse!

That was a nice play. Come here.

Nice play, Jake.

Kidder boys rule the day!

- Yeah! - Yeah!

Get a picture. Come here.

Everybody bunch in together.

Picture for Dad.

I know he likes his pictures.

That's a Christmas star moment, don't you think, Dad?

Your grandmother could really make a Christmas.

I got money to collect.

Hey, Dad, meet Amanda and Karen.

Amanda? Karen.

Their software firm is going public soon,

and they're gonna need some serious help

with their online ad campaign.

Yes, but how did you know?

Small town. Word gets around.

And my dad is one of the best creative minds around.

Wow. If your work is as sharp

as your son's game, we should talk.

Uh, definitely. Is tomorrow...

- How was the game? - Amazing, actually,

and I think I might have landed a new job lead, thanks to Pete.

- What? - Yeah.

I'm so happy!

Should be close.

It's raw.

- What? - It's raw.

Did you reset the oven after the power went out?

- No. - What?

So no Christmas dinner?

Way to go, dufus!

Hey, who wants beef Wellington anyway?

I wanted it.

I wanted to dazzle you guys with beef Wellington.

Instead we have steak tartare.

I think it's gonna be good.

It's a bit frozen, but, you know, I think if we have the salad.

Let's do the salad.

We'll have some, um...

Stop.

Oh, look.

I got it, I got it.

- Look at that. - Ooh, that looks good.

- Look at that. - Should we taste it?

- Oh, yeah, yeah. - It's hot.

It's, um... It's interesting.

It's got a...

I think the word is inedible.

Oh, I shouldn't have improvised that sauce!

That was delicious.

I don't remember, I swear,

adding that port wine reduction sauce,

but it was delicious.

Oh, uh, no, I got the dishes.

Uh, all right.

Thanks.

Mmm. Honey, that was delicious.

And what a pleasure to have such lovely guests.

That's the kind of tradition I like.

It was so kind of you to invite us.

To be honest, we've been a little lonely this holiday,

but your Pete knew all the right things

to say to get us over here.

The more the merrier, I always say.

How about a little music?

Okay.

That was my dad's favorite song.

He was a cellist, and we'd all sing along.

May I?

Hey.

Thank you for tonight.

It was fun and good for my mom.

Yeah. I'm glad that this day could be perfect for everyone.

But Grandpa and my dad won't stop arguing,

even on a great day like today.

Listen, you can't change who people are, Pete.

But there must be something I can do

to make them quit arguing.

Do you know what?

Maybe they just need help finding common ground.

Common ground? With those two?

Yeah. I mean, a common goal always brings people together.

I don't know how I let Pete talk me into this.

Me, neither. It's freezing.

Give him two eyes, it would help.

Nose isn't bad.

It's way too round down there.

It's what?

It's too round. It's wrong.

It's called perspective, Dad.

There's more than one way to make a snowman.

No, there's not more than one way to make a snowman.

- There's more... - Not round like this.

It looks like Fatty Arbuckle down there.

I don't even know who that is, Dad.

Dad, this is a snowman. It's perfect.

You know what you did?

Something you've done a lot in your life.

- What? - You chose the wrong way.

- I chose the wrong... - Yes!

- It's a snowman, Dad. - Oh, is it?

- There's a thousand ways... - It's not... It's a snowman.

- Okay, there! - I'm outta here.

Dad, Dad! Why don't you remake the head?

Okay, if you don't like the body,

why don't you remake the body, okay?

If you don't like this,

let's just chop it off here and fix the snowman

- if it takes us all day. - You know what?

Are they still going at it out there?

I mean, what is it?

Nothing I do gets them to stop.

But, Dad, what are you doing? You just got here.

Come on, I know when I'm not wanted.

What are you doing? You just got here!

Come on, I know when I'm not welcome.

Okay, no. Come on, Dad, come on.

We're making your fantasy snowman here.

We're gonna make your fantasy snowman.

Stick your head in the snowman.

I'm making the snowman!

I'm gonna stay out here.

I'm gonna finish the snowman.

What are you doing?

What are you surprised for?

There's nothing for me here.

You came here!

I'm not asking you to leave!

Come on, I know when I'm not wanted.

You're wanted, Dad! Come back here!

Nothing ever changes.

Is this how it's gonna be?

Are Grandpa and Dad gonna fight for the next million years?

You dumb star!

I hope you turn into a red dwarf!

What are you yelling at a star for?

It's complicated.

More complicated than projecting listening skills

- onto a mass of... - Just buzz off, okay?

Pete, maybe I can help.

How do you do it?

Be so cheerful and smart and great at everything?

I was born that way?

It really brings up the fascinating question

of nature versus nurture.

Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for being a jerk.

I guess I'm just jealous, okay?

Of me?

Pete, I'm jealous of you.

Me? Mr. Middle Child, ordinary Pete,

who can't stick to anything? Why?

People always expect me to be so smart

and perfect all the time,

and it's exhausting.

You know how many times

I've retied my bow tie today to keep it perfect?

Nineteen.

That is a little obsessive.

But you?

Do whatever you want, have fun.

People don't lay the same expectations on you.

You know what?

I didn't even want that telescope.

Feels good to say.

You didn't want it?

Then why didn't you say anything?

Things have been really tough on Mom and Dad lately,

and I just wanted to give them one less thing to feel guilty about.

Anyway, if you want it, it's yours.

Nah, you keep it.

I really have everything I need.

And, Kenny, just 'cause you're perfect

doesn't mean you can't loosen up and have fun, too.

And one more thing.

Ah!

Oh, snowball fight, huh?

Oh!

Oh, nice.

But you can't dodge this one.

Get ready! Here it comes!

Here it comes! Here it comes!

Ohh!

Good night, Pete.

Merry Christmas.

Dad?

Did you and Grandpa always argue?

Um...

Well, sometimes.

But after your grandma died,

something that should have brought us closer together

actually made us grow farther apart.

I don't know. It happens sometimes.

I miss her, too.

She was funny.

She always smelled like peppermints.

After she passed away...

my dad just kind of walled himself off.

Think he regretted not spending more time with us.

He must have been really sad.

You know something?

My mom had the best Christmases ever.

Every room in the house was decorated with lights.

The presents were wrapped perfectly, and the...

And the tree, the tree was,

I don't know, it was just lit up, you know, like a wonderland.

When Grandpa starts griping about our Christmas, I...

He's really just missing Grandma.

Uh, well...

Never really thought about it like that.

Um...

Hey, good night.

Merry Christmas.

Good night.

Do you think I'm crazy?

No. I believe you believe what you're saying.

You say that every time.

It's funny, though.

Reliving the same day is like watching a movie over and over again,

and nothing's what I thought it was.

Well, if what you're saying is true and you're not pulling my leg,

which I'm sure you are,

sounds to me like you've been given a chance

to make Christmas perfect.

That's what I thought, too.

But as far as Grandpa and Dad,

maybe perfect isn't attainable.

You know, you once told me that the best thing about Christmas

is it forces you to slow down

and look up at all that's around you.

I said that?

Guess I'm smart.

Forces you to look up.

You just gave me an idea. Thanks.

Welcome.

What's going on here?

I need you to enhance this photo of the ornament

that's on top of the tree.

And I raided your Duracells.

Um, how come?

No questions, okay, buddy?

Come on, Dad. What are you doing? You just got here!

Come on, I know when I'm not wanted.

- What? Grandpa, don't go. - Pete, please.

You can't!

Y'all have a nice Christmas.

Wait! Before you go,

you might want to slow down and take a look up...

at the tree.

You found the Christmas star.

We just recreated it.

It's amazing.

It's a gift from all of us to you and Dad,

memories old and new.

It's perfect.

Remember that picture?

It's Mom at the bake sale.

Yeah, that's the year I burned the turkey.

Look how happy we were.

Yeah, we were.

Well, I really should go.

Uh, Dad?

I'd like to ask you to stay for Christmas,

and that's an invitation that's long overdue.

Really, I gotta go.

I can't impose anymore.

Sorry, Grandpa.

You're not going anywhere tonight.

You know, I was a pretty mean linebacker back in 1968.

Then you have to go through me.

And me.

Oh, boy.

And me, Dad.

You guys broke me.

I mean, I'll stay another night.

What can I do, you know.

- Thank you, Grandpa. - Thank you.

As long as I'm gonna be stuck in a day,

let it be this one.

What?

The train didn't crash.

Nothing stops the Red Liner Express

from its 7:35 AM departure.

Wait a minute.

Okay.

Hey. Morning, Pete.

Hey, you gave us some Christmas.

So Christmas is over?

Honey, I'm sorry Christmas is over, too.

It's okay.

It's more than okay.

Look how much the star looks like the one that Mom made.

- No, better. - Yeah.

No, no!

Touching by you is out.

Good evening, radio land.

Don't touch that dial.

Hope you enjoyed that meteor shower last night.

Christmas may be over,

but New Year's Eve is just around the corner.

Music classics are coming at you all night long.

- Hi. - Hey.

What a fantastic party.

And the food looks delicious.

Oh, you guys can put those over here.

Okay.

Hey, guys, I baked all these cookies,

so make sure you eat up.

Okay.

How you guys doing?

Good.

Dude, you want to play with my new Christmas toy?

Sure. I'll show you my telescope.

I'm so glad you could make it.

Oh, it's my pleasure, dear.

It's always nice to have some holiday cheer.

I'd like to introduce you to my father-in-law.

George, you remember our neighbor, Josephine?

The lady with the great spirit

and a touch of a Philadelphia accent?

- Foxborough born and bred. - Attagirl.

Honey, keep some hot toddy hot for me.

I'll be back in an hour.

What's with the outfit?

I've got that job interview with the software firm,

thanks to Pete.

So do I look hip?

Honey, anyone who meets you won't have any doubt.

Save some of that for me.

Hey, Grandpa?

Yes, sir?

Thanks for nothing.

Excuse me?

Remember that Christmas box you gave me,

the one full of nothing?

Finally figured it out.

What is it?

I realized that life's like an empty box.

It doesn't matter what you get out of it.

What really matters is what you put into it.

It's a music box.

It was broken.

Must have fixed itself.

Like a whole lot of other things around here.

I love you.

So did you end up having a merry Christmas

or a merry, merry Christmas?

You know, I've lost count,

but that's just fine with me.

Ho ho ho!?