Original subtitles

But the point is, if you're gonna spend all day fucking,

shouldn't Pied Piper be a dude you wanna fuck?

All right. Let's do an exercise.

You've got unlimited time and resources,

you can build anything in the world you want with your compression,

anything at all, what's it gonna be?

- Three, two, one, go. - Go, go, go.

You said I have unlimited time? Now. Now, now!

A new Internet.

What? Why?

Okay. Well, I haven't really thought this through, so...

Okay.

I own a telescope... Of course you do.

...and I brought it out one night to look at the full moon.

Of course you did. And I got to thinking...

"Wow, we put a man on the moon

using the computing power of a handheld calculator."

And then I thought, "Okay...

"there's literally millions of times

"more computing power in my phone

and that's just sitting in my pocket doing nothing." Right?

So then I thought, there's, what, billions of phones

all around the world with the same computing power

just sitting in people's pockets.

So then I thought, "What if we use all those phones

to build a massive network?"

We use my compression algorithm

to make everything small and efficient to move things around, and...

if we could do it...

we could build a completely decentralized version

of our current Internet, with no firewalls,

no tolls, no government regulation,

no spying. Information...

would be totally free in every sense of the word.

You wanna build a new Internet?

Yeah, it's-- Richard, I like it.

That I would fund.

Well, I-I-- I don't know if it's possible, and--

Look, if this new Internet is the man of your dreams

and this is the man that you wanna fuck,

then you need to fuck him.

That man I will pay you to fuck.

Where the fuck is that kid?

Wait a minute.

Aw, shit.

They kicked us out of this place.

I'm at the wrong fucking school.

Richard, you find that man, fuck him good.

Careful please. He's gonna peel out.

♪ Cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort ♪

Monica, I need to--

Oh. You're not...

Monica? No. Thank God. I'm Ed Chen.

Laurie put me in the good office and moved Monica down the hall.

Way down the hall.

Okay. Sorry.

You're gonna listen to Russ Hanneman?

Richard, you sound like a crazy person.

I know, but-- but Russ is right.

I mean, I hate the video chat. I really do.

Oh... What?

Oh, wow, you can see right into the--

Yeah, I'm very aware.

Laurie is punishing me for taking your side

and going against her, so she moved me down here

and gave my office to that little

brownnosing shit, Ed Chen.

Anyway, Richard, you're not gonna seriously go home

and tell the guys in your company

that even though your user rates are skyrocketing

that you wanna pivot.

For the past 48 hours,

I've been trying to rewrite the core video chat code,

and I literally can't.

Instead of typing, I just bite my fingernails.

I think, subconsciously,

I would rather bite my own fingers off than work on this platform.