Original subtitles

We won't rob the bank van, we'll just try to rob it... and fail.

PREVIOUSLY ON TUFF MONEY

We are the pillars of the local community.

This man wants 25% for logistics?

-Are you mocking me? -Calm down!

Those bastards attacked her and no one did anything. Police did nothing.

This is where you two come in.

I notice rehearsals are going from bad to worse.

-I don't know about these boys... -I'm not thrilled either.

Damn! "Inabit" watch says everyone's been punctual.

Freeze! Don't you move!

-Now what are you waiting for? -Scram.

-Gun it, Doru. Go! -Where to?

To Bucharest!

What if the Captain declares this car stolen?

We have to get out of town and hide somewhere.

-It's the fuel warning. -I know.

Go fill up.

With what money?

Just go!

Spending it already?

Want to get away or not?

-Yes. -Then move!

I'll pay, you fill up.

Just one thing:

Stay alert. Okay?

-You stay how? -Alert.

What are you doing?

Doru! Doru!

Get moving, boys, the Captain is here!

Sir!

Block the entrance and radio the crew to block the other too!

Pull the car there!

Block that.

Everyone out and cordon off the upper level!

Faster with the bandages!

Block the parking lot too! Both levels!

-Captain, a statement, please? -Get the press out.

-Please leave, you will be informed. -How much has been--

You're damaging evidence!

-Clear the area! -How many people were injured?

Was it an inside job?

Stay out! What do you think the tape is for?

No onlookers!

Everyone step back, we're moving the tape!

Doru!

Doru!

Did you sleep well?

Ionel!

Where were we?

Get yourself together!

You lied! It was supposed to be a rehearsal!

What's wrong?

It was like telling a kid to count to three

and yanking out the tooth on "one".

No time to be afraid.

By the way, where have you been for an hour?

Ten minutes!

Yeah, right.

Mr. Captain in the Romanian Police.

I call on your conscience.

This is stolen money!

-I know, you stole it. -No, you did!

I mean we did, but you forced us!

Oh, really.

How about this one:

You're this poor town's heroes.

We all need money, and you've helped us all!

I'm so proud of you!

As is Mr. Adi.

What? Yes, very proud. So, 12,560,000. What's the exchange rate?

Two point seven million euro, like Ms. Manager said.

And divided by four?

Station, come in!

Yes, Boss.

I requested two helicopters, why do I only see one?

The other one has broken down.

Broken down. No wonder people criticize us!

-Is everything alright? -Yes.

-So? -675,000 euro each.

Attention, everyone.

My share.

Your share.

Sniffy Bank Chick's share.

Guys, bag this separately.

And the Robin Hoodlums' share.

Love you, boys.

The immorality of this aside,

how did you come up with this wacky calculation

where we get the hardest job and the least pay?

It was our idea, our work. We deserve at least half of the whole.

-As a matter of principle. -Principle?

What do you need that much for?

It's a matter of principle.

If we go to prison, it should at least be worth it.

Guys, get rid of the car.

How do we carry all this?

Got another bag?

Get the bleach and take off the license plates, quick!

Oi!

What are you doing?

We should have gotten more.

I know.

-They lie to us... -Then they taser you.

And chloroform us both.

Then they stiff us on the pay-out.

At least I can pay for my wedding now.

And I can help Maria with her watch business.

But we can never tell them.

Never.

We're really going to keep it?

I don't know.

We need to hide it while we decide.

Yes.

And I know the perfect place.

Isn't this too visible?

That's the trick! And it's newly repaired.

No one will need to open it.

...we will identify witnesses and search for clues,

to determine the suspects.

I was watching that! Some guys robbed a bank.

So? Did they steal from you?

I know him, I work with his wife.

Such a slut.

There's Ms. Big Journalist!

As if anyone watches her local pieces!

This bank robbery is her one shot at fame.

...get fingerprints, we have skilled investigators...

Skilled my foot! Bunch of idiots!

-Elena, stop it. -I know them!

See the one in the back? Acting like he's taking measurements?

-A drunkard! -You know him too?

Who doesn't? He buys coffee and tops it up with rum.

With him, the case is as good as solved!

-He's just doing his job. -Incompetently!

Why didn't they find Maria's attackers?

Or the ones who pissed on Mirela's wedding dress?

If they were any good, they'd be solving cases in Bucharest, not this backwater!

We're lucky this robbery gets us some visibility!

In the middle of nowhere!

Hi.

Did I or did I not tell you to keep that phone on?

My battery died.

Your neurons died!

And we've been worried sick that something happened again!

Have you seen what goes on in this town?

Bank robberies, shootings!

-What shootings? -Shut up, I was making a point!

...that we will soon restore peace and order.

Ironically enough, I got to the high school on time.

I know. That watch doesn't lie.

If I'd been punctual, I'd have sabotaged it.

Yes.

Don't I fix everything?

Yes, you do. Thanks.

Maria, please forgive me. I had a problem with...

At work.

If I hadn't fixed the traffic, our lives would have been very complicated.

In that case, thanks for saving us all from disaster.

Sorry.

Keep up.

Sorry!

Wait!

If you drop me like this at the wedding...

Sorry, I didn't mean to.

What's with you today?

I'm tired.

I don't think it's that.

You rehearsed better drunk, last week.

I wasn't drunk, I had had two beers.

Listen...

-Is there something eating at you? -No.

Nothing.

I think there is.

And you're hiding it from me.

Ionel...

Is that how you want to start this journey together?

Fine.

What's that?

My winter tires, love.

Thought I'd store them with you.

No problem.

Why six, though?

-Six? -Yes.

A car has four wheels, so why six tires?

Two are spares, love.

-I need to go. -No, don't!

-Spend some time with me. -I can't, I'm on a mission.

You always are.

You could fuck me for a change.

There's been a bank robbery, didn't you see the news?

Yes, exactly. I'm worried, isn't it dangerous?

I got it covered.

Don't worry, alright?

Fine.

-Hey... I hope you catch the thieves. -That's why I'm going.

Lock the door and don't let anyone in.

Like Snow White let in the evil stepmother.

She can't breathe!

There, dear, it's alright.

Breathe, dear, breathe!

Easy, don't panic.

-Where's the Captain? -Why?

-Are you afraid of me? -No.

Just wanted to congratulate you both.

I really must say it's been done very professionally.

I had my doubts, but congratulations!

Same to you.

What's this?

Your share.

The weight isn't right.

I took it upon myself to reassess each party's effort.

A commission composed of me, myself, and I has decided

you only deserve 75,000 euro.

Excuse me?

We were going to split it evenly.

I changed the deal and kept your 600,000, without telling the Captain.

-Why? -Why?

So you see what mob work is like.

Shocked?

Who's the deer in the headlights now?

That backpack looks good on you.

I want my money!

Keep it down, people will hear!

I'll make a scandal!

Can we please get a statement?

Once I know what happened.

-Any suspects? -How much was stolen?

How are the guards doing?

Keep filming!

Manager, there was a robbery around 12.

Two unknown persons attacked the armored van.

-Loss? -We don't know yet.

We're calculating it with help from the Treasury.

You don't know how much was stolen?

The van had visited four branches, we're still centralizing data.

You'll have to issue a press statement.

After we assess the damage.

We can't put it off, head office insists.

-They called from Bucharest? -Yes.

I don't know what to tell them.

Maybe say the guards are unharmed?

That blow...

Believe me, I saw stars.

Not green like they say. Tiny white ones.

When I came to...

The armored doors had been torn off,

one guy was unloading the bags

and my colleague here...

was kneeling, hands behind his head.

I knew I had to strike back, immobilize at least one!

But they had guns!

I said: "Boys, don't! This sin will ruin your lives!"

Then one of the bandits put the gun to my head and said:

"Then pray!"

Then...

I felt like crying, because...

I thought he'd...

shoot me.

Thank you. Let's take a break.

Have a smoke, calm down.

Such daring chaps.

Yes, quite an ordeal.

The guards too, but I meant the attackers.

In our town? In broad daylight? With guns?

Unheard of in these parts.

I myself am shocked.

In all my years in the force, I've never...!

Do you think you'll catch them?

I believe so, yes.

They'll betray themselves,

buy expensive things.

Thank you.

Yes...

I am sure the Romanian Police will solve this case.

-We live to serve, madam! -Thank you.

Wait. Could we have a brief word in private?

I'll be right back.

Woman, are you insane?

Bringing that backpack into a police station?

I know it doesn't go with the suit, but we do what we can.

I really hope you have your sports shoes in there.

You're crazy!

No, you are, cutting my share.

Me? I even asked Mr. Adi to split it fairly.

But he wouldn't!

You asked him?

-You're a police captain! You make him! -I can't!

This is why we can't have nice things.

People don't do their job!

Please keep it down.

Excuse you?

This sum is nowhere near enough.

I'm with you, but what can I do?

I'd do anything!

Great, then give me a little bonus from your share.

I'm not saying half and half, but still.

Why me?

If Godfather Adi won't, who else is there?

The two traffic light guys.

Ask them, they got a quarter!

Beg from those wretches because Adi stole from my share?

Ms. Evelina, I understand your frustration.

I'll even ask Mr. Adi again,

see if I can get him to understand your situation.

But I can't split my share with you!

I can't!

-Heard about the heist? -What heist?

Some guys robbed a bank van! In broad daylight! In our town!

-They got it made. -They'll get caught.

Nah, they planned it all.

Nobody gets away with it in this country.

Everyone knows everyone.

They'll fight over money.

I'm giving them 3-4 days tops.

No way, they had ski masks and gloves on!

If they had masks and gloves, they can't get caught, right?

Get serious, they have new methods. Phone signals, geolocation...

They track people's phones on that street, at that hour.

They centralize traffic camera footage.

Technology!

By the way, who's going to diagnose the traffic lights in the center?

-Boss, we're busy. -We'll go!

Out of the question. You've just come back, you're tired.

Pavel here. I can go, I'm in the area.

Step on it!

Don't start with the "go faster, go slower" again!

Told you it's a stupid hiding place!

That workaholic is coming!

Damn workaholics!

This way!

Where do we take them?

Let's each hide our share.

It takes up less space.

Where?

Anywhere.

Just not at home or in places that can be linked to us.

Where, then?

Somewhere neutral and unfrequented.

Like where?

Make it as compact as possible.

In case the border guards get curious.

Seventy-five thousand euro, seriously?

It's not even enough to pay the guards.

There's my assistant, too.

Should I pay them out of my own pocket?

End up in prison for robbing a bank and make a loss, too?

Give me my full share.

-Please. -Please?

Please?

Your bank turned down my medical loan four times.

I said please too, and you didn't give a shit!

I'm not the bank.

Don't pout now. Guys!

Pass me a wad.

I'm not such a bad guy.

And to prove it...

Here, a little farewell gift.

Take the backpack or leave it. Up to you.

The head office in Bucharest called again.

Madam, you have to issue a statement.

It's been hours, the journalists are speculating.

-Tell them to wait. -Very well.

It's not for you.

Come give me a kiss.

What's wrong?

Maria isn't home.

-Where is she? -No idea.

But if she doesn't remember to keep her phone on,

I'll shear the other half of her head!

It's like I'm talking to the walls.

A drink, Boss?

Just coffee.

-Did you hide yours? -Yes.

-You? -Yeah.

-Don't tell me where. -I won't.

It's safer.

-Is it really okay to go? -Yes, we have to act normal.

Go to work like normal, have a beer like normal.

-But... -What?

They heard us talking about the heist.

A bad joke. I'm known for my bad jokes.

It would be suspicious if we didn't show up.

Act normal!

The police is sparing no effort.

Our crews coordinate and...

Your favorite table is waiting.

...and proceed with the investigation.

-I'll switch to the football right away. -No, the news is fine.

Can we please have two beers?

Yes, but for now the cameras are not working.

IMAGES FROM THE CRIME SCENE STATEMENTS

We hope to remedy this in the future. ..

Dad, you're on TV!

...that something like this could happen in our little town?

Scoot.

It is regrettable that this tarnishes the image of our town.

You're on all the channels, every five minutes!

We assure the population

that public order will be restored as soon as possible.

Thank you, Captain.

What is this world coming to?

I'll attach that rank slide with glue!

Turn it up, that's the bank manager.

-Can we get a statement? -What happened?

Yesterday, around 12:30,

a van from our branch of Euro Est Bank was robbed by persons still unknown.

The investigation is ongoing.

The guards opposed the robbers and were brutally injured.

They are now fine and getting the best medical care.

We support the authorities in apprehending the criminals.

Any questions?

Are there any suspects?

Not yet, I think.

Was the amount insured?

The National Bank requires all sums in armored vans to be insured.

Our clients' money is safe, it was never in any danger.

Sources say the amount stolen was 12.5 million lei, or 2.7 million euro.

Can you confirm that?

No, it was not 12.5 million lei.

It was 21.5 million lei,

or 4.8 million euro at the current exchange rate.

-What did she say? -21.5 million lei.

No way, that's almost double.

-Did she say 21? -Wasn't it 12?

Who will take responsibility for the robbery?

That's enough, thank you.

-Four point eight million euro! -I know.

Twice the money, twice the sentence?

You're the math whiz.

It can't have been that much!

It didn't feel like 4.8 million.

How do you know what it feels like?

I was there when Mr. Adi and the Captain counted it.

That crazy bank manager is wrong.

Insurance scam. That's what she's doing.

She won't hesitate to scam the insurance company as well.

So we're not just robbers, we're insurance scammers too!

I found something!

I found it!

A lot of money!

Where?

Come see.

Listen to this.

I was on the sofa.

Suddenly...

I thought I'd sort out the bookshelves,

to make room for the new stuff, and...

Guess what I found in this book!

One hundred and eighty-five dollars!

It's my handbook from university.

Wow. You were saving up in secret?

I had forgotten about it.

See?

Lucky you have me to make you roll in money.

Good.

There's nothing about any arrests.

Good!

They say the police have no new leads.

Also good.

"Captain Caraion leads the investigation."

So we're safe, right?

Right.

Though you can't always trust the newspapers.

Not always. But at least with this.

Where's Ms. Evelina's office?

She's expecting us.

-You can't go in. -Let us in!

Out of my way!

We couldn't stop them!

It's fine, the gentlemen have urgent business.

-Everything alright? -Yes, thank you.

-You tricked us! -Where's the other nine million?

There was only 12 in there!

I counted 12.5 million!

-Will you let me speak? -Go ahead.

There was 12.5 million in that van.

Where's the rest, up to 21?

So what was in the van doesn't match the amount missing?

-Yes. -Interesting.

We're talking nine million!

May I know why you care, since you all got your share?

With a bit extra from mine.

Mrs. Manager, I didn't take yours.

I am a very honest man.

I didn't take one leu from your share.

-You tell her, Mr. Adi. -Wait.

So you took nine million.

As revenge for us... well, for me taking your share.

So you took another nine million and blamed it on the robbery?

You got more than all of us put together.

Out of curiosity, Mr. Adi...

On what storey is your office located?

-I don't understand. -Please answer the question.

My office? Upstairs from my bar, first storey.

First, I see. And your office, Captain?

-Second storey, in the police station. -Perfect.

Now, on which storey are we here?

No idea, second, third?

Fourth.

-Fourth? -Exactly.

So: first storey, second storey, fourth storey.

You follow?

What do the storeys have to do with the nine million lei?

Nothing.

But they speak volumes of our respective status and IQ.

One, two... Four.

-So? -Mr. Adi!

You thought I'm a blonde broad, so you can fool me?

I was fair and ladylike with you, and you shafted me.

I didn't! Ms. Manager!

You shut up. You didn't lift a finger.

So!

My office is on a higher storey because I take higher risks.

Risks others don't have the balls to take.

Yes, I rectified the amount in my favor.

But the very fact you are in my office one day after the heist

denotes a very sad IQ level.

Blondie, are you taking us for suckers or for idiots?

Take your pick.

-Mr. Adi, please calm down! -Hands off!

Madam? Someone from Bucharest is here.

Hello.

Lt. Col. Parfenie, from Organized Crime.

-I've been tasked with the case. -Hello.

Aren't I on the case?

You being?

-Captain Caraion. -County Police?

You'll be working with me. Madam.

Welcome.

And the gentleman?

The Captain just told me he's an eyewitness.

We have an eyewitness!

We'll have a lot to discuss.

Don't leave town, please.

Why don't you tell him what you told me?

-I hardly think-- -Please go ahead.

Number of persons, car make, any other details, like height.

Age, perhaps?

Were they wearing masks?

Hey, guys!