Original subtitles

I am Doru, he is Ionel,

and we're with the Public Works Department.

FROM THE PREVIOUS EPISODE

After years of being treated like dirt by drivers...

We showed off over a beer.

Never mind, we'll rob the armored van!

The bar owner, a shady guy,

took it very seriously and now he's forcing us to do it.

You will do the heist. 'Cause you said so.

Good day, Ma'am! You're about to get robbed.

To persuade the traffic lights guys,

threaten their families, their friends...

Some hoodlums sheared Maria, look!

Our burglars stained my wedding dress.

-Pee?! -Boys, look.

It would be best for everyone if you behaved.

Who stands to lose most if this heist goes ahead?

Us...

Look at those drifts!

We don't have a metro!

-Want to watch The Heat again? -No, they have guns.

-The Town? -Guns.

Only The Italian Job has a no-gun robbery!

Ionel, this is just ridiculous.

Hey!

-What's up, boys? -Just watching a film.

-Happy birthday, Doru! -Thanks.

It's your birthday? Why didn't you say?

I don't like celebrating it.

I knew, and I got you muffins!

I'll leave you two.

Just look at her.

I have a guilty conscience.

-What for? -Lying to Mirela.

Ionel...

Mirela can't know anything. Same for Elena and Maria.

It will be very dangerous.

Don't breathe a word!

Here's the plan.

Plan A is for those lunatics, Plan B is for us.

Plan A: we do all they want.

Plan B: we nitpick about everything.

Cars, equipment, info.

And we keep putting it off.

How?

The armored bank van comes this way.

I change that light, so it goes that way.

-Then... -What?

At least we have a Plan A for those lunatics.

But we'll make a Plan B, for us.

-What's plan B? -Plan B is this.

After the underpass, we direct it left.

In Plan A.

In our secret Plan B, we put up a traffic light there,

and force it right.

Got it?

I'm on it.

And that's how we strike.

I don't like your plan.

Why would it turn left and not right?

So no.

-No what? -I don't like it either.

Too many variables.

Well, you plan it if you're so smart.

Pass me the car.

Right.

It needs to go from point A to point B.

We need to make it turn right here.

And there's a traffic light here,

so here's where you boys step in.

This is a Polish model, very hard to connect.

But I'm sure Ionel will find a way!

Right, so we label this intersection Node 1.

Next, we ask the armored van nicely,

with two police crews,

to make a right here,

and label this Node 2.

Aw, how cute!

-In pink! -Never mind, let's move on.

What about this intersection?

I'll whip up a construction site

and divert traffic left.

We'll label it Node 3.

Right.

So the car makes a left, and then?

Well...

It goes on and on this way...

out of the underpass, and into this intersection.

Who handles this one?

Gelu!

Get some boys and set up roadworks there.

Divert traffic left.

-Yes, Boss. -And this is our Node 4.

So through the underpass, onto the street where we'll ambush...

And this is where you two come in.

To rob it, as it were.

Well, no.

We don't like your plan either.

-Why not? -It...

-It gets in the way of our plan. -Exactly! We...

took measurements on site.

Either you let us do it our way, or do it your way and leave us alone!

Or...

Let's vote.

Who's in favour of the initial plan?

And who's for our plan?

Right, plan voted.

Now for the date of the heist.

When will the armored van carry most money?

On the 15th.

-Two weeks from now. -I can't.

-Why? -Too busy.

Getting married.

But he says "I do" on Saturday. We strike on Friday.

Mr. Adi, if they like voting, let's vote.

Who's for the 15th?

Against?

We strike in two weeks.

What am I going to tell Mirela?

We'll think up something.

"Sorry, love, the day before our wedding

I have an armored car to rob!"

-The voting idea was yours! -You didn't vote to change the date!

So much for Plan B!

We'll come up with a Plan C.

Like what?

Here, you pick the radio channel.

Radio on!

Plunge and twist.

You try.

And twist.

Next time you get assaulted...

-Are you crazy? -Stay out of this.

-I'll get a shiv. -No, that can get you expelled.

Nail scissors, though, are self-defense.

I made a little pocket under the waist for the scissors,

so you don't waste time going through your bag.

There.

Perfect.

Thanks.

Sweetie, make sure you go straight for the jugular!

Oh, come on. Remember the pepper spray.

You want her stabbing people?

Those bastards attacked her and no one did anything.

Not the police, not you, not the school.

-I won't sit idly by. -No, you're educating her!

Wow, thanks! You remembered!

Why is it missing a slice?

Maybe it was the guys who sheared your daughter?

See? No stains!

-And it didn't shrink. -Great.

I hope you remember...

We're going to church tomorrow.

Church?

To set the time for the service.

Five more couples are getting married that day.

Then...

Why are you undressing me?

In case the priest tells us to wait until the wedding night.

In that case...

Like it?

-Like The Italian Job ! -Right!

Listen, that load of cash takes up a lot of space, right?

How bulky would it be?

In bills of 50 and 100...

Twelve million, one hundred and fifty thousand is about...

About one thousand wads.

Or 20 standard money bags.

How big are those?

40 x 60 cm.

Anyone got a measuring tape?

I thought something small and fast would be best.

It doesn't even have a boot!

Look.

Even I don't fit on the backseat.

I'll find something else, let's rehearse with this.

Pardon my interruption, Mr. Adi. A question about the plan:

Once you have the van ambushed, how will you open it?

In case you have memory problems, we haven't done this before.

Why are you looking at me?

Isn't it the bank's van?

So?

You think they teach us how to jimmy it?

I expected "Mr. Mobster" to provide the solution.

-Not look like a deer-in-headlights. -Now listen, sweetcheeks.

One: mind your damn manners and don't interrupt.

Two: I did time for attempted murder, not robbery.

He wants 25% for logistics?

Are you mocking me?

-Calm down! -Hands off!

-Mocking me? -That's enough!

I'll find a solution.

Meanwhile, can we rehearse with this?

Go, boys!

Get out quickly and block this off!

Put a couple over there!

Good! More over there.

Node 1, ready.

Lawmen, ready.

Node 2, ready.

Roadworks ready.

Node 3, ready.

Node 4 ready too.

Target approaching.

Initiating.

We're on.

Go.

Target approaching.

The traffic is stopped.

Turning green now.

Come on!

We're off.

Approaching node 2.

Crew 12, stand by.

Target turning right.

Node 2 successful.

We continue to Node 3.

You're welcome. Over to you.

-I see it! -Stand by! Incoming in 10, 9...

eight...

seven...

six...

Hey, what--

Target gone amok. I repeat, amok!

Not bad for the first go.

Mr. Adi, your team's pooped the scoop!

Chill, this is Plan C, not even planned!

Let them bollix it up.

I know, my fault this time.

The van gave us the slip.

We'll redo it until it goes like clockwork.

Fifty, seventy rehearsals a day.

Anything it takes to do it right.

Question: Do the van guards have guns?

Of course.

-But I doubt they have bullets. -You doubt?

And if they do?

It doesn't matter.

You block the doors so they can't come out.

How exactly?

No idea, I'll think about that too.

First, let's think of how to stop the van and open the doors.

I'll do my homework.

Fine, our work here is done.

Our job is waiting, see you for rehearsals.

Wait.

Overalls and ski masks.

Hold on to them.

-Do we wear them for rehearsals? -No, keep them,

until the heist, then you burn them.

I don't know about the boys.

I'm not thrilled either.

They're green, they don't even have a criminal record.

Everyone's late in each phase.

Damn! "Inabit" says they've been punctual.

-What's that? -A birthday gift from my daughter.

An Eastern European watch.

Right.

We need a better plan. One they can't botch.

The wedding crowns are meant to evoke

the crowns of old, worn by kings and emperors.

They symbolize the pride, the honor,

and the reward bestowed upon bride and groom

for their purity and virginity.

-So 3 o'clock, yes? -Yes.

Three precisely, I have other weddings.

And confession?

-We have to confess? -Absolutely.

No confession, no Eucharist. No Eucharist, no wedding.

Can't we do it the same day?

You're here. Why not confess right now?

Father, wait.

We're sort of unprepared.

I'm totally prepared.

-Hey, Ionel. -Doru, I need to confess!

-What? -Before a priest, for the wedding!

So confess.

And our thing?

Not a word, got it?

-I won't lie in confession. -So don't.

-Just leave it out. -No, that's still lying.

Lying by omission, but still lying. A burden on the soul.

Ionel, anything you say

is a danger to everyone, our families first of all.

And you can't confess what didn't happen!

-Ionel, can you hear me? -I won't lie.

Hey!

What do you think?

-You were right. -Wasn't I?

Aluminum is much softer and lighter.

-What's next? -I need five more of those.

What?

Five, then we go to the glassblower.

Why?

-Aren't we picking up the prototypes? -Yes.

So you'll come pick me up every day now?

If you want me to.

I won't get assaulted daily.

I'm not coming to guard you.

Really, Dad?

Suddenly you pick me up from school, take me to the workshop

to work on the project you don't even believe in?

I know you, you're hiding something.

Father, I didn't observe Lent, but at least I don't smoke.

Honestly now...

Did you commit the sins of the body?

Of both the body and soul.

That is not good.

Read the Paraklesis to the Theotokos,

and sin no more.

In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit...

Father, there's more.

It's a huge opportunity, this crafts' fair in Bucharest.

-When are you going? -The day after tomorrow.

I'll come along.

No need.

What if I want to come along?

I'll just take a minibus.

What does the copper want?

Hello, traffic police officer Simion. Your documents, please.

-What have I done? -I'll tell you in a moment.

Teodor Leonte, I should take your license.

This time, though, you get off with a fine.

-What for? -You just ran a red light.

-Me? -Yeah.

First, I don't run traffic lights, I fix them.

Second, I have a dashcam, let's see the pictures.

-Partner, do you copy? -Yes.

The driver claims he didn't run the red light and...

he has one of those recording things.

-A dashcam! -A dashcam.

I see. Copy that.

Then he was speeding.

Copy.

Right! You're getting fined for speeding.

The Captain wishes you happy birthday.

What Captain?

-Morning. -Morning.

EURO EST BANK THE BANK OF YOUR DREAM

Daddy's hero, let's connect you to the little robot.

Right.

Try it.

Won't you let me drive you to Bucharest?

-Please. -Dad, you're always late.

I won't be, I'm coming just for that!

It's important for me to be there on time, people are waiting.

Alright. Tomorrow.

But please be punctual.

No way!

It's the expensive one.

Yes, the nicer one.

How did you...?

I'll redeem it after the wedding.

I proposed to you with that ring.

And I said yes.

But it's more important to me that we're both happy with the wedding

than to wear a ring.

And I don't care if we won't have money.

I care about you.

About the two of us.

I need to tell you something too.

Try it on, alright?

Who's there?

I just wanted to look through the peephole.

I got a speeding ticket yesterday.

The Captain's harassing me!

They put a pick through my door!

You're sure you don't want me to pick you up?

-No, I'll see you there. -Okay.

What do you think?

What's this?

The interception car.

-No, Mr. Adi, it's a Dacia. -A Dacia Duster!

Roomy boot, new distributor, fresh suspension bushes...

Even AC to keep your ass cool.

I can't get in a car like that.

It's fine for rehearsals, but for the real deal I want a decent one.

Now you're nitpicking? Are you?

They drive, they get to choose.

So we don't have a car.

Fine.

Next time you tell me what car you want, including the year!

Let's rehearse with this one for now.

What are you doing, dimwit?

Who left this in my door?

Wait!

We cooperate. What's with the threats?

Police fining Doru, mobsters wrecking my home!

I can't work with this stress!

Sucker, you think we're idiots?

-That we'll just believe you? -Mr. Adi, please, let's calm down.

Let's rehearse.

Move that ambulance!

Get moving, boys!

I told you to block the cars, forget that shit!

Lawmen, ready as always.

Node 1, ready.

Stop fiddling with it!

We'll get shards in our eyes.

Play dead!

Put some oomph into it!

We're done here. Node 3, ready.

Node 4, ready.

We're waiting for the van. Good luck.

We can see it.

-Copy that. Node 1? -Light turning green.

It worked, next time we'll take bets.

Van turning right.

What are you doing?

Target moving straight.

I repeat: The target went straight, not right.

Node 2, failed.

Not my fault, Boss, they missed it!

Your mum missed her period! And you'll miss your salary!

No worries, they're sabotaging themselves!

I notice rehearsals are going from bad to worse.

Now what? Head back to the warehouse?

For a parent-teacher meeting?

Anyone copy? It's the van!

The van is coming my way!

Yes, target sighted.

Duster, step on it!

Great time to show up, dipshits!

Just half the route left, then we can go home.

For the next rehearsal, the Police should learn from Mr. Adi

and manage their intersection!

Understood, we'll fix it next time. Sorry.

HOW WAS LUNCH WITH THE GIRLS?

Getting to the underpass.

We're in the underpass.

I hope Node 4 is better organized.

SOS, the target braked suddenly.

What are they doing?

Shoo!

Get going!

-What was that? -I don't know.

What's wrong?

Freeze! On your knees, hands up!

Up!

We want to help you, not rob you!

Shut up and put this on.

-Crap, you're in on it! -Shut it and move.

-Ionel! -Shut up!

Hands up!

Get back!

You think you can cut through with that?

Shut up!

Doru. Doru, what's happening?

The heist.

No! This is a rehearsal! We're rehearsing!

No, Ionel, they suckered us.

But we're not dressed!

Guys, this is a rehearsal!

Shut up and put that on!

Such a tainted portrait of today's society.

Shush, and hands behind your head!

Tired, dickheads?

Move!

Move!

Alarm code 22! We've been robbed.

Two suspects in a red Dacia Duster.

What are you waiting for? Scram!

No.

No.

We won't do any heist.

It's done already, Grandpa. Shoo!

We refuse to shoo.

Let the police come, see what you've done.

-Criminals! -Fine.

Let's see who they believe.

You will tell them the truth and so will we.

Sure.

Ionel, let's go.

I'm not moving.

I don't want to go to prison and lose Mirela.

Mate, whoever Mirela is, if you stay, you lose her.

Stay out of this!

Let's go.

Doru... I want to marry Mirela.

Mate!

Go marry that woman, have kids with her,

live happily ever after in love.

Stay here like an idiot and you'll get locked up.

Let's go.

-They tasered me. -Plan C is now Plan A!

-They tasered me! -I know, now what?

An amandine, please.

A bright red car with a hole in the windscreen!

We stick out like a sore thumb!

-Where to? -Head for...

For Bucharest! Out of this damn town!

To the anti-corruption unit!

I can't believe they tricked us.

We did it! We actually did it!

Why didn't we leave the car there?

Why didn't you tell me?

-Floor it, Doru! Floor it! -Where to?

To Bucharest!

-What? -It's red.

Our car is full of stolen money!

And the police are behind us!

-Go! -Running a red light is bad luck.

Move it!

Okay.

We'll go to Bucharest another way. Turn around.

Shit!

Go left, easy!

Our wheels screeched!

You're never happy with my driving!

They didn't even tell us where to go next!

-Where the hell are we? -Brake!

Take a right! Right, now!

-Where are you going? -No idea!

Now what? Do we cross the river?

Maria...

Sorry!

-Careful! -Doru!

Watch the--

What now?

Get the hell out of town and to the anti-corruption unit!

You want to refuel with that cargo?

I can't answer all your questions.

You can't?

Did you or did you not promise there'd be no heist?

-Yes, but... -I'm not done!

What's that in the back?

-I was wrong, now what? -Thank you.

I'm sorry!

-What? -What?

-Keep going. -Going where?

Traffic light boys, where are you?

We've been looking for you.

-What are you doing? -Shut up.

Your fingerprints are all over that radio.

-Want to go back for it? -Just drive.

Faster.

Actually, no, go slow.

-I swear, you... -Stick to your driving.