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LIFE AT THE RANCH

My name's Pamela.

Pamela? That's beautiful.

Beautiful? I think it sounds like a porn star.

Don't you?

Oh, never mind.

Manon!

This is Quentin. He's in film school.

Manon's my childhood friend, we live together and everything.

That's Quentin. He knows Chloe.

- No, Antoine knows Chloe. - We were classmates.

Oh yeah, right.

Maybe Quentin doesn't know Chloe.

Chloe's a doll. I haven't known her long,

but she's a real trip, I love her.

Hey, Lola! Come meet Antoine and Quentin.

- Lola's my BFF. - Wanna make out?

This is Louis Lindenberg.

Hey, where's Bart?

Check the living room.

The living room?

Shit...

He's so not in there.

- Olympe, have you seen Bart? - I think he took off.

No way!

- What'd you do to him? - What's that?

Gimme some!

- What is it? - A drink I invented.

- What's in it? - Vodka, strawberries, sugar, lemon...

- Gluten-free, totally organic. - Great.

I was looking everywhere for you.

Here, take this.

- Champagne? - No, beer.

Seriously Bart, I felt excluded.

When was that?

When you two started going out.

Pam, stop laughing, it's not funny.

Sorry.

Let's get down to business!

The leading cause of blindness in France!

I'm freaking out, I can't find a corkscrew.

This is some sweet shit!

But I can't find a corkscrew...

- Open it with your ass! - A corkscrew!

- Smash it open! - I don't want red, I want white.

Not cool, Lola.

Give me back my smoke.

A Marlboro Light blowback. How rank!

Don't drink from the bottle, moron!

- I need a Gin Fizz. - I'll make you one.

- With something fizzy. - Gin Perrier?

No, Gin Fizz, you know.

Pam!

That's so disgusting!

- Don't spit in the chicken! - Kiss me on the lips.

Get off me.

Come on!

Come on!

Hey, Jude!

What're you doing? Don't leave!

You gotta try her amazing love cocktails.

Stay with us. Take her coat off.

Bruno'll be pissed at me.

Fuck Bruno!

- Party time! - Happy Birthday, Raf!

Pam, I dig you.

- Thanks for the party. - You dig me.

Pam, you know, you and me...

We're like eggs, sunny side up...

- Steak and eggs... - We'll be an omelet for life!

- Where's Lola? - She left.

- She did not. - Yes, she did.

Someone said she left, but...

Watch out!

Give me a sip.

Tastes like grape juice!

Got a light?

Where's Raffy?

Know where he is?

Raf, there you are.

Ham sandwich?

See you tomorrow.

This way.

- Sandwich, anyone? - I'll have some.

I scored nothing tonight.

Zero, nada, zilch!

I missed something here.

What's wrong?

I'm hurting, and you don't give a shit.

I do give a shit. I totally give a shit.

I'd never cheat on Bruno, not even with The Invisible Man!

I don't wanna go home. I don't wanna sleep alone.

I hear you. But if you sleep at the Ranch,

you'll be on the couch with me.

With Raffy the snore monster!

Bring it on! Anything not to sleep alone.

Seriously?

Manon, stop shit-stirring.

Hey, that looks like Sven's scooter.

- Yeah, right. - Almost the same.

It stinks in here.

Want some cake?

- Where is everyone? - I don't know, sleeping.

We're not sleeping.

I need an Alka-Seltzer. I feel like I'm speaking German.

You guys are harsh.

- Can I have a piece? - It's delicious.

Cut me a piece.

I want some too.

I'll bring the whole cake in.

Not my 20th birthday cake! You're cruel.

At 20, you have to share.

Feel ok, Bart?

No, I got a headache.

Where's Bart?

Hey man! How's it going?

How do they make cakes like this?

Hand me a Lucky, would you?

Could someone wipe my hands?

- Our paper towels are in the john. - I can't move.

Bart, can you get the paper towels?

You need to clean up.

You do it, Mommy.

- You've got some here. - Here, here...

I'm tired, girls. Cut it out!

Stop squirming. What's wrong?

- What are you looking for? - William Faulkner.

- Who? - Faulkner: Sanctuary.

Like, William Faulkner.

- Scoot over. - Fuck that book, man.

You don't know the power of Faulkner.

The guy won't leave without his book.

You guys wanna come to my place for dinner next week?

Totally!

Go on, you'll be late.

Get lost.

Then Lola goes: "Touch my tits," "my nipples are hard!"

You were pretty horny yourself last night.

You were lusting after my friend Benjamin.

- What's he do? - He's a singer.

Like American Idol?

No, he's good. I might become his manager.

- What about your creeps, Pam? - What creeps?

You only talked to them for hours! Antoine and Quentin.

Did you score one?

No way, they were too ugly.

- You've fucked ugly guys before. - We just talked.

You mind moving your hand?

It's all sweaty.

Bart was all alone on the couch. Poor guy.

I know, that was bad.

Move your legs!

Pam, give me some sugar.

In your dreams.

You bitches!

You're both bitches.

You're studying at brunch?

Yeah, I made note cards.

I'm philosophical, so I'm brunching.

- To each his own. - To each his own shit!

Fuck you.

Fuck you too.

Oh, hon, I'm so sorry.

- Get away! - Want a massage?

I'm still trashed and you kick me in the balls!

I'm boiling hot. I gotta get out of this thing.

I'm sorry, Raffy. Honestly.

- Where are my jeans? - Here.

Know what? I gotta study, get lost.

Masked number... Louis.

It smells like sex in here, doesn't it?

That's pretty. I like it.

I'm at the Ranch.

I'm gonna catch some rays, Place des Vosges.

I'll call you later, we'll hook up.

Ok. Later, dude.

I'm out of here. I have to study.

- Move. - You move.

- She's such a bore. - Give me some sugar, Pam.

Are you nuts? Keep dreaming.

Manon, gimme some sugar.

I'm working!

You never gimme any sugar lovin'!

Businesses use sports vocabulary in metaphors such as:

team spirit, team leader, and fair play.

Sports values reflect those of the society in which they exist.

Isn't that kind of dry?

- You have to do it this way. - Why?

To get the grade. I do what they ask, and I do it well.

You could try thinking outside the box.

Athletes, like citizens, must play by the rules

for the match to run smoothly.

You're impossible, but I adore you.

Manon, stop it! You're drooling on me.

It's not funny. Your breath reeks!

- Yeah, doesn't it? - Nasty.

But you're cute.

You're a bad influence. I'm going back to sleep.

Your feet are cold.

Pam, you've stopped going to school.

No, I still go.

I just haven't been feeling well lately.

How's lover boy Topher?

Still got a toilet brush up his ass?

I sent a text. No spelling mistakes, but no answer.

His crotch still hairy?

- Still collecting degrees? - He's getting into his PhD.

- But is he getting into your pants? - Very funny!

- Does he like dirty jokes? - We communicate differently.

- Like, nothing deep? - Actually, he sees the real me.

Whatever!

- Why do you say that? - I just love saying "whatever".

You're the kind of girls who take mega notes.

But I totally shared mine at exam time!

You did not.

You used them and did better than me, bitch!

Did you all go to Hermitage?

Not all of us. Manon, Pam, Bart, Jude and me.

Don't make a braid.

Personally, I was very happy at Hermitage.

- Is that why you worked there? - It paid for my therapy.

Yeah, after Hermitage you're a total head case!

Don't laugh. I'm happy to report I no longer suffer from depression.

And my job was cool, I was Cafeteria Boy.

Did you wear a hairnet?

Hermitage was rated 3rd best school in France.

Those fuckers kick all the slow kids out

to get that ranking.

- It's a totally elitist system. - Not at all.

When you have access to a privileged education,

you're part of an exclusive group.

Still, we had a blast there together all through our teens.

What about salt and pepper pussies?

The Mystery of the Salt and Pepper Pussies!

- Ever fuck a cougar? - No.

Inquiring minds want to know: are their pubes striped?

My theory is, when they turn gray, they fall out!

- Old people have no body hair! - Old people are bald and blind!

Why weren't we invited?

- You wanna come? - It's blondes only!

- What's with the whispering? - That's rude.

- Knock it off. - Tell us too.

Is this Manon Does Paris?

So what's the plan?

We need to turn down the volume, guys.

It's getting late,

we're gonna catch hell.

Can I get a ride on your scooter?

- Shotgun! - Why you?

Because I called it.

But I said it first.

That's how shotgun works. Whoever calls it, gets it.

It's BB Bruno!

- Go in the phone booth! - I'm at Bart's.

Don't laugh.

You want me to list everyone here?

- Not again! - Tell him to come to the concert!

It'll be our good deed of the day.

They're 21, for fuck's sake!

I'm not getting trashed, Bruno!

Twenty-one and a half!

Women burned their bras, you know.

Fucking pain in the ass!

Jude, you're a doormat.

Pam, you sleeping here?

Where'll we sleep?

There's room at our place.

- At the Ranch? - Wanna sleep at the Ranch?

I'm trading you for two gorgeous hunks.

We'll start heading over.

- Call Chloé. I'll call Olympe. - Ok.

- Olympe? - Gouda!

We're going to this guy Benjamin's gig.

Want my mom to get her chainsaw out?

Hey, Chloé.

Cool. What'd you eat?

Sounds yummy.

- Who's gig are we going to? - Benjamin's.

- How old is Manon? - 20

Who gives a fuck about her?

Come on, he does.

Tonight I'm gonna make her mine.

Any 16 year olds out there?

- You do 15 year olds? - I do 14 year olds, dude.

They're 17 to 22, and they look cool.

I'd say between 16 and 40, 22 is my average.

Drummers score 4 out of 5.

Singers bat a thousand. Pisses me off!

How about managers?

One out of 5, but always the best one!

What made you want to be a manager?

What made you want to play drums?

Women love it, it's primal.

You cash in on the band's talent. Thanks a lot!

- Stick to distribution. - Ok, fine.

Copyrights. Make us rich.

Hi, Mom.

Hang up, dude!

Sorry, guys, it was my mom.

Don't forget, we're Dirty Dog Shit. Total punk rockers!

I wanna puke.

Feeling seasick? First gig on a boat?

I need my soda pop.

We gotta practice!

- Can we get an autograph? - Sure.

- Who's Candice? - Me.

It's so amazing to see you in person.

- What's her name? - Mailys. We're sisters.

Candice.

With love...

Benji.

Want our autographs too?

My first autograph.

- Mailys. - How do you spell that?

Samson's giving her his number.

- Where's your name from? - It's Basque.

Samson on the drums! Sven on bass guitar!

On vocals and guitar, Benji!

Hey, everybody!

They showed a short before The Servant.

Wish I'd seen it.

Hey, Topher.

Hi, I'm Lola.

I'm warning you, I've been drinking.

Speaking of which, have you seen Hong Sang-soo's latest?

Night and Day? Yeah.

I was a bit disappointed.

Oh yeah?

With what?

Hong Sang-soo's latest film.

What didn't you like?

I found it lazy compared to his others.

What film?

Night and Day. Hong Sang-soo.

A Korean filmmaker.

He probably has something like...

1,000 fans in France, if that.

Maybe a few hundred in Korea.

Don't know him.

He's brilliant.

Except for his last one.

But Woman on the Beach was amazing.

Yeah, I loved it. He was back on form

after Tale of Cinema, which was so boring.

The first half is comedy, it's ok. But the second half falls apart.

I disagree. I think the whole film works.

Are you Belgian or something?

Why do you say that?

- Is it my accent? - Yeah.

- What accent? - I've heard that before.

Waiter?

How'd you like Center Stage?

Loved it. Thanks for the DVD, I'd wanted to see it for ages.

Maggie Cheung blew my mind. I'm so in love.

But it's true that...

it's a drastic change in style for Stanley Kwan.

It's like a documentary. Did you see The Goddess?

No, but I've seen other films with Ruan Lingyu.

- At the Cinema? - No, at a festival.

- Sorry. - No, go ahead.

There's a Wong Kar Wai night.

Yeah, they have one every six months.

I went two years ago.

I went three or four years ago, I can't remember.

I guess that's out, then.

You're sure you're not from somewhere else?

His girlfriend's Korean, maybe that's it.

She says hi by the way.

Korean? Is she a friend of Jung Li's?

- How is Jung Li? - Who's Jung Li?

- Your ex. - Her name is Delphine.

Whatever. An Asian bitch is an Asian bitch.

We don't hang out anymore.

Glad to hear it.

How long has it been now?

About six months. She's studying engineering in Grenoble.

She's even into math?

- I'm sulking? - Yes, that's why I'm sulking.

You talk down to me.

You spend the whole night talking to a million people

and when we're finally alone, all you do is text. It pisses me off.

I spent the whole time with Lola, looking for you, like a loser.

You were fucking wasted.

Who's that Benjamin guy? Think he's hot?

He's pretty hot.

Nothing happened. He played a gig.

If I was with him, he couldn't play his gig.

So you're going to bed, end of story?

End of story.

Like, you're right and I'm wrong?

Exactly. You got it.

- What's wrong, sweetie? - I'm so depressed.

What's wrong? Did you fuck up?

Topher dumped me, I'll never pass my driving test, I'm a wreck.

He dumped you for real?

I can't stop crying, it's horrible.

Topher's an asshole.

Do I call Bart an asshole?

- It's all over. - We'll go out and talk.

I fucked up. My life, my driver's license...

Don't be silly, honeypie.

Hey, what's up?

I hope you passed. I hear it's easy to copy.

No one can copy Topher.

Yeah, they broke the mold.

Everyone's pissed off at us for talking.

Who gives a shit about the laws of the road anyway?

You have to get up earlier.

Let's go for potstickers.

Ok. What'll we have with them?

Fried rice.

Can we drink, too?

Sure. We'll have some wine.

- You coming? - Come.

You guys go ahead.

Come with us! Let's go.

- My purse! - You wild woman!

Stop it.

Come on.

- Don't I get a ""goodbye"", girls?" - Bye!

Was the goal tonight to stuff our faces?

I feel sick, I wanna puke.

I hate puking. I've done it three times:

On a friend's mom on Halloween,

after fondue and Indiana Jones, and after a fish fry on the beach.

Remember getting carsick as a kid?

- Are you eating to forget? - Very funny.

So give us the scoop.

He said it's over, but this is no time to split up.

Scoot over.

- Manon, you've got dandruff. - It's over.

It never started!

- Hey guys! - What?

- Pam, shut up! - Need toilet paper?

Tampon, Manon!

We don't want to hear about your crimson tide vagina!

How disgusting!

See her pussy?

Nah, she's like my kid sister.

Manon, cool it.

- You're so crude. - You got caca on the comforter!

Stop it!

- Those were my panties. - The panties?

The ones she swiped from you?

- Pam? - Yeah?

Where'd you get your panties?

Show us your panties.

What panties?

- Show us. - Come on.

I'm not wearing panties.

When did you stop wearing panties?

Two seconds ago?

Don't you ever go without?

Smokin' hot beaver!

Bastard!

- Topher's the bastard! - Not a total bastard though.

Shake your booties!

Can I say something? Are all our guys fucking head cases?

Are we all fucking lushes?

- I talked to my shrink about it. - What'd she say?

I told her I always go for fucked-up guys. It's not funny!

I'm not laughing.

She says we choose guys we want to save

cause their suffering makes us feel stronger.

Whereas if the guy's strong...

Does my breath stink or what?

She's a fucking lunatic.

Stop shouting!

It's true what I'm saying, it's super important!

- It's dumb. Who isn't tormented? - Me!

Everyone's tormented.

- Jude's not tormented. - But her guy is.

Thanks a lot, Pam.

Hot ass Lola!

Not like that!

I'm looking for a corkscrew!

Manon, get the door.

Olympe! Get your pussy up here!

Go, girlfriend!

- Sexy! - Look out!

- I'm drawing up a business plan. - Cool.

I'll be interning at this place

where you learn how to start a business,

create your own company and all that.

I've contacted some backers in the States.

Raffy?

Where are you?

Tell him to pick up some ice cream!

Can you pick up some ice cream? You heard me, ice cream.

I want a Cornetto.

One Cornetto... and a pint of Cookie Dough.

Cool. That sounds good.

Shut up, you sluts!

Did she call us sluts?

I wanna see Bousquet the Bitch.

She's out of her mind.

Fuck you.

- I'm gonna explode. - And I feel pregnant.

Ok, Chloé, baby time!

Put your arms inside. Ready?

We're doing this in one shot.

It's a girl! Mazeltov!

- I want my ice cream. - I saw this documentary.

It's about...

these two women...

- Got a microwave? - Don't eat that, it's nasty.

There aren't any cigarette butts in it.

Work it, Samson!

- You just got a spoon for yourself? - Here's one, Raf.

Too baggy!

- You always look great. - Thanks.

Come sit on my lap.

- Who are you calling, Raf? - Kenza.

- Who's Kenza? - The Party Queen!

Who's Kenza?

Fuck the hipster bimbos!

- I'm scared! - Chill, I got it under control.

Shit! Fuck it.

It's dripping on me!

- Sven, don't step on the tampons. - The strap-ons?

Get your shoes on or we'll never leave!

How do you feel?

Not great.

- I need a big hug. - Me too.

Don't worry, we're gonna party. We'll forget about all that shit.

How many are you?

Let's have a potsticker contest. Where's Pam?

There she is. Pam!

I can just see it now.

- What? - We're gonna end up at McD's.

Let's get some lox and bagel and go home.

This is lame. I'm gonna go see the two giants.

- What's she up to? - Who knows.

Hey!

I'm throwing a pee party between two cars!

Hang on a sec! Fritz and I are rolling a joint.

Frederick and I are rolling a joint.

Hold my purse.

I'm freezing my ass off.

Omigod, Pam! Lola's all over Tom Sawyer.

- Huh? - You're missing the show!

- Just a sec. - Fucking hell!

- Get up, hurry! - Wait.

- This is unbelievable. - Here it comes.

- Pam, hurry up! - It's coming.

- She's going for it. - Ok, I'll piss on myself.

- Pam, you're missing everything! - Ok, I'm pissing.

Amazing. This is so cool.

I'm pissing in the street here, dude.

Would you mind keeping your eye out?

- I'd rather watch Lola. - Watch out for people walking past!

Chill! She's making out with Tom Sawyer.

That Berliner's not putting up any walls.

Check out my puddle!

Nasty.

Gross. They're totally making out.

Let's go hassle them.

Lola, it's freezing, let's go!

Lola, I've had it up to my ass, I'm outta here.

Hang on, let me get Fritz's number.

No, I'm taking a taxi. Coming, Manon?

Can I have your number?

Wait up, girls!

Wait for me.

Taxi!

Taxi!

Over here!

Pont Neuf.

We don't have any money!

- Shit... - Take my card.

I'm flat broke.

You sure it's ok?

Damn, you smell good.

I love it.

I wanna sleep so bad.

Oh no!

Pam, we're late, it's half past!

- Half past what? - Half past one.

- Are you ok? - No.

- What's wrong? - My stomach hurts.

- Is it bad? - Yeah.

- Is it your appendix? - No, it's not my appendix.

- Should I go without you? - This sucks.

Go without me.

Did you throw up?

No. I don't think it's food poisoning or anything.

- What'd you eat last night? - Nothing special.

- Want some Pepto Bismol? - No.

That shit's a placebo, it doesn't work.

- You're the placebo. - Right!

Want me to call your mom?

No, don't worry, I'll call her.

But take notes for me.

And tell the teacher I have a fever.

I'll tell him you're fine. I mean sick. Dying.

Thanks.

A tall blond Northerner...

- Who's that? - Fritz.

- Does he live in Berlin? - No, Paris. But he's in Berlin now.

So?

- Is he good-looking? - Gorgeous.

I'm calling him next week.

You didn't go home together?

No, Pam! Putting ketchup on that is a sacrilege!

I like it. Got a problem?

You ruin it that way.

I'll sit next to Samson if it bothers you that much.

Come here.

Finally, an understanding soul. You love me, ketchup and all?

Nobody noticed my new curtains!

- Exquisite. - Thanks.

Sven, I dreamt about your mom.

She was dancing in the street with my mom.

- Dancing? - Totally getting down.

- Does your mom have a lover? - Yeah, Georges.

What?

Samson's mother's lover is Jude's dad.

What a slut!

Louis' mother is an online cruiser.

- She's on Be2. - No, she's on Meetic.

If it's him, make something up. I don't feel like talking to him.

Hey, Bart. How's it going?

She's in the loo, can you call back?

Tell him she's taking a big dump.

Ok, see you later. Bye.

- Go easy, it's strong. - What's wrong?

"Stop askin' questions, girl" "What's your game?"

"I'm gettin' irate" With you stayin' out late

"With your gangsta friends" "Always makin' me wait"

"Turn the volume down, baby"

"They're not gangstas," "they're my homies!"

Don't rap it, you're supposed to enunciate.

Louis 14th style.

You're trying to rap.

Amelie Mauresmo...

Can I get a cig to roll a joint, Louis?

Don't call, turn off your phone.

- I can't do that. - Turn off your phone and have fun.

- I can't, I love him. - Let him stew in his own juice.

- I'm gonna call. - He needs to learn his lesson.

I'm calling.

Amelie Mauresmo...

Is there any white wine?

I know, I'm uncontrollable.

I got carried away, I know.

Don't be mad at me, I'm sorry.

But you don't either!

You don't give a shit either!

I'm sick of you freaking out about your fucking exams!

Are you there for me when I need you?

Barthelemy! Barthelemy!

I'm in a tiny apartment, everyone can hear me.

Pamela! Pamela!

I sent you two texts!

Two texts! Two texts!

You're a total moron, you drive me crazy!

You're a fucking asshole.

And I'm a fat whore too!

Fat whore! Fat whore!

Stop it, that's mean.

I've had it with that bastard.

But Bonny Beaver's family no longer got along.

At Bonny Beaver's cremation, the whole gang got together.

Some of the tears that were spilt were fake.

But whose?

To whom did Bonny Beaver represent a threat?

Who hated her enough to eliminate her?

Whom did she overshadow most?

Who killed Bonny Beaver?

I used our hangouts: the Ranch, the Crash Pad...

That's so cool.

I made up rules so we won't argue.

- I got Love Cocktail. - Listen...

- Give me some Cookie Dough. - Hang on.

Hang on!

Stop hogging it, I want some too.

Hang on! One more bite.

- Give me a spoonful. - Wait!

Lola, no! Give it back!!

Cookie Dough is sacred, you've been hogging it forever.

Listen to me!

- Give me that Cookie Dough. - No.

- Put some in my spoon. - You're not getting any.

In my spoon!

I got it all over!

How's it going?

Not great, I have a sore back.

- A sore butt? - No, a sore back.

Oh, a sore back! Gotcha.

I'm seeing the chiropractor at 2:00.

Sounds like a laugh.

I'll come in my PJs. I'm pretty rank right now.

We'll go as shanky as possible, ok?

Sounds good.

See you in half an hour.

Ok, see ya.

See ya, toots.

- You mean the gang? - Yeah.

I get the feeling Manon can't stand me anymore.

No, Pam, there's no relation. You're being paranoid.

That girl's studying for her driver's test.

I can't escape it.

- God, it hurts. - Perfect position for smooching.

Stop it! It hurts.

- It hurts? - Yeah, when I move.

Don't worry, he'll crack you.

- What? - He'll crack you.

Don't freak me out.

- Cracking doesn't hurt. - It does hurt.

- No, it doesn't hurt, it cracks. - It hurts.

On a pain scale, what's waxing?

Calm down or you'll crack it yourself.

We're being obnoxious.

Everyone in here looks...

Sick, that's right!

And we're sick of hearing your twaddle.

He's coming back to Paris tomorrow.

He can't see me like this, I look like a crippled puppy.

We'll get you a cool neck brace.

It was so magical.

I felt a special connection between us.

I'm sure he'll call me.

- Maybe he'll show up at your door. - Topher?

No, Fritz the Berliner.

The only problem is, he thinks he's a rocker.

- Does he wear black eyeliner? - No, but he could.

I like guys in make-up. Like Johnny Depp.

It's stylish. Original.

I'm telling you, Bart is crazy about me.

It's getting more and more serious.

- Yeah? - He says I'm the love of his life.

He wants kids and everything.

If you get married, I'm Maid of Honor.

That'd be a trip.

We'll throw a big party.

But Manon and Jude don't take us seriously.

It pisses me off, because it's really important for me.

Maybe we'll just elope.

You can't elope. Everyone knows everyone in Paris.

It'll be headline news in no time.

We'll go to City Hall, like grown-ups. It'll be cool.

You could get Louis Lindenberg to be the priest.

He'd make a hilarious priest.

It's ok, don't worry.

How's it going?

Yeah, me either.

I totally blew it, big time.

I've been awake since 8:00, killing time.

I wanted to call at the right moment. Not too early, not too late.

You know, the perfect moment.

I thought 11:50 sounded good. Not too early, not too late.

So I called and got his voicemail.

I left this pathetic message. I sounded like such a stupid twat.

He'll never call me back, ever.

Now I'm alone in my room, in a total state.

Hang on, I'm trying to light a cig

and I've got my neck brace on.

I've got a sunburn too, to top it off.

I called five minutes ago and he hasn't called back!

Yeah, but maybe his plane hasn't landed.

Or there's a snowstorm in Berlin,

or his bags were rerouted to the Congo.

Who knows?

Do you think he'll call me?

No. I imagined the whole thing, like always.

He'll never call me back.

You'll call him?

Why would he pick up for you and not me?

Ok, go ahead, call him.

You think he's ignoring me?

Ok, but mask your number.

Call me right back.

Well?

Did you hear his voice? Isn't it beautiful?

If he doesn't call back by tonight, I'll forget about him.

What're you doing?

I'm doing nothing, wanna do nothing with me?

You got a cure for hysterical women?

They used to put a pot of hot water between their thighs

so the vagina would drop.

So it's really over?

Yeah, I'm sick of hysterical broads.

I want a nice, old-fashioned girl-next-door. No drama.

So who's the target?

- Is that her? - No, it's Paola.

Hey, mind if I eat your mashed potatoes?

- She didn't touch them, did she? - No.

I hate eating off other people's plates.

Damn, thought it was mine.

Your saliva mixes with theirs.

You got a message.

It's Vero K.

- Who's she? - Someone to avoid.

- Vero who? - Vero K.

There are 2 Veros: Katour and Lebowski.

- Is she a fan? - No, she's in my class.

She's a brain.

- At what? - At everything.

We had this essay to write.

About the Hundred Years' War. So we teamed up.

But I didn't want to do it, so I told her my cat died.

She thought that was so sweet, she did the whole thing.

Paola again. Seven calls in seven minutes!

Why doesn't Fritz call me?

Shit! I thought it was mine.

Who's Fritz?

- Fritz the Berliner. - What Berliner?

The Berliner I met at The Baron.

- The Berliner. - You in love?

Maybe he's not back yet.

Yeah, maybe he's stuck at the airport or something.

Imagine if he saw you in your neck brace.

I can't pee, it burns.

Get a bladder infection last night?

I think so.

Must've been the champagne.

- Are you sure? - Or the white wine.

- Champagne causes it? - Or the beer.

- What else could it be? - The gin and tonic?

- Maybe it was the pineapple. - The pineapple?

Once I got a bladder infection from eating pineapple.

Why wasn't I invited last night?

It was a costume party. Look.

- How're you and Bart? - Much better.

- Honestly? - Yeah.

Seriously, we're really happy now.

Why now and not before?

Bart can be oversensitive.

- You still cheat on him? - No way!

- You've stopped? - I never did!

- When did you last cheat on him? - Fuck off, I never have!

When'd you take "your ""Libertine"" status off MySpace?"

We haven't argued in two and a half months.

You're so lucky. Why won't Fritz call?

Did you say "Fritz" in your message?

Should I text him?

I'm not sure of his name. I heard someone call him Fritz.

- His name might be Frederick. - Whatever.

- How long have you been waiting? - Six hours and 37 minutes.

- Jesus, what's the big deal? - It's 6:44 pm now.

- Call at 6:45. - I don't like round numbers.

Wait until 8:00.

Remember that nursery rhyme?

I'm off to Biarritz To see my friend Fritz

He's waiting at the Ritz

We'll drink Gin Fritz And listen to Liszt

On the train I'll read Leibniz Goodbye, Austerlitz.

I'll recite it.

I used to think Fritz was just a rhyme.

She never stops calling! 6:58, 6:59, 7:04, 7:08...

She's obsessed.

- I did tell her I loved her. - No wonder she's calling.

It was only to get laid. Works every time.

- Got a suppository? - They're for yeast infections.

I'll cook. What's in the fridge?

- Nothing. - There's some hummus.

- Hummus. - Oh yeah?

The stuff you brought back?

Ok guys, it's Fritz!

Get rid of your cigarette.

Concentrate.

You said Fritz!

You're such a dumbass!

I don't know, that might be his name.

- Will you wear your neck brace? - No way.

- You can't wear that top. - I know, it's not right.

I can see why.

Topher says it's not sexy. But I was afraid

if I wore something too nice, he wouldn't call. So I wore this.

"We said natural!"

I can't go like this.

- Sure you can. - I'm taking the brace off.

No! He won't understand why you can't move.

Try to kiss the door.

I can move without the brace.

It's Fritz!

What if he kisses you and you can't move?

It's Fritz!

- You forgot your keys? - It's Manon! Shit!

- She's gonna kill me. - You have so much toilet paper.

Samson, not the toilet paper!

I refuse to carry a whole pack around.

- I hate buying toilet paper. - So I have to buy it for you?

Give it back, Samson!

Come in.

Hello.

I came to see how she's doing.

I'll get out of your way.

Can she hear us when we talk?

She may be able to. In any case, you must talk to her.

I mean, it's good to talk to her.

Will it help?

It's hard to say. But it's best to assume that it will.

It will help you in any case, to say goodbye.

It's important to say goodbye, to get closure.

You may have things to tell her, like you love her, perhaps.

Things we forget to say to our loved ones,

and that we regret not saying when it's too late.

It happened during the night?

Yes, last night her condition suddenly worsened.

This morning, we found her like this. We put her on oxygen

to help her breathe.

How long will she stay like this?

We can't say how long she'll be with us.

Check me out, Run DMC!

Yeah!

Cool!

I found my top.

- This is way better. - Awesome!

What is?

My crochet vest.

- Gorgeous. - You're wearing that?

Hi darling, I work with Thierry Mugler.

Shall I dress you for the party?

Oh yes, please! Fritzo Frutz will be there!

How'd it go? You didn't say.

- Great. He's a vegetarian. - Get out!?

He loves animals. He's a sweetie, he loves nature.

He's really clean-cut.

- Kind of a know-it-all. - Sounds like a mama's boy.

He can tell a chestnut from a poplar.

- He's smart. - You mean boring.

Groovy!

You look like a bag of McDonald's fries!

A bag of Fritz fries!

Hello!

Wow, girlfriend!

If I were a guy, I'd rip that dress off with my teeth!

Careful, it's fragile.

It's fierce.

Costume party's over, we gotta go.

Fritz is German and Fritz is punctual!

- Get dressed, you look like a slob. - I'm changing!

Fritz can't see her in that dress.

I know he loves animals and she's in leopard...

But she's beautiful, right?

It's no good, Pam.

- It's the perfect occasion. - I agree.

This isn't sluts' night out, it's a gallery opening!

Jude, it's not slutty! Not if you wear it to a classy place.

- Otherwise, yeah, it's slutty. - She's right.

She looks like Dustin Hoffman in Tootsie!

I look like Dustin Hoffman?

You look like you're in drag!

I look like Dustin Hoffman?

She does not!

Go change.

I like it and I'm wearing it.

Good. You don't look slutty.

Fine, keep it on.

- Lola, you should go before us. - Why?

To prepare him for us.

I'm not ashamed of you. Besides, Fritz is very open-minded.

- You think he'll get Pam's humor? - Sure, Germans are real funny.

If anyone disses me, I'll put my fist in their face.

No one's dissing you, you're just inappropriate.

Fuck off, you gotta be free.

Free maybe, but not cheap.

We're going to a chic gallery opening,

it's Fashion Week,

nobody wears a skin-tight leopard dress

that barely covers their ass!

- You look like a whore. - I like it.

What about Sarkozy's law on passive soliciting?

When did you start liking Sarkozy?

You're ridiculous. You say such stupid things.

Come on, go change.

No, I'm wearing this.

You see your grandma today?

What's wrong with her?

My granny's gonna die!

- I feel like a monster saying that. - Tie-dye!

Tie-dye is back in fashion!

- Hey, she's my granny. - Yeah.

So what?

Or I could do something really hardcore!

Hey horsey, chomp that bit!

Fritz!

Stop it Pam, you're scaring me!

Put this on your head, no one'll notice your dress.

She's a wailing siren!

Enough.

We need something edgier, Raf!

- It's my label! - The Chic Label.

It's not your label, it's our label!

Benjamin's right, it's our label.

I'm in charge of image development.

You need at least 100,000 euros.

Money's not the issue, it's about the artists.

Where's the console?

- It'd be better over there. - Over there!

You'll look like a pro with the white backdrop.

You drink too fast.

Do you mind?

- Not at all. - Good.

Lola, look, peanuts!

- You're the peanut. - I love peanuts.

What about you, you like peanuts?

She won't even answer me.

Maybe she's slightly trashed.

I now realize Fritz is a complete and total asshole,

and only one person truly matters...

Topher's the love of my life. I know that now.

- You're sure? - Of course I'm sure.

I know he's obsessed with his bullshit Asian films...

But he's the one, you know? I can't explain it.

- You're sure? - Totally.

Fritz is such an asshole.

Wanna hear about another asshole?

- Get lost. - I'm not in the mood.

Come here. I've had it with life at the Ranch.

I wanna live with you.

I wanna move in with you.

I love you.

- Hey, you. - What's up?

- Are you Pam? - Yep.

- Nice to meet you. - Same here.

Thanks...

for coming to help us.

It's nice of you.

- You're the one moving out? - Yeah, and she's moving in.

Can I keep the saddle?

No, it's mine.

I'm taking your bed.

Hold your horses, partner.

It's my Ranch, I'm head filly.

I'm taking her bed.

- Is this yours too? - Yeah.

It's cute.

You think so?

I like this guy!

- No regrets? - Don't be silly!

This is yours. I won't take it.

I can keep it?

I'm taking your place, but I love you!

Welcome to the Ranch.

What do you do?

Never ask a Berliner that question.

We don't really do anything.

Sorry.

I'm an artist, I've got a studio. I paint, I sculpt...

And I study literature.

Really? Me, too.

Yeah? What year?

Second. Majoring in art and literature.

Actually it's pretty varied.

We do lit, and some languages too.

Berlin's a huge city, sparsely populated.

Nobody works.

I was fascinated by the ruins,

the way people appropriate the city as it's being rebuilt.

Sounds great.

You should come.

Listen... I'd love to.

You should come now, it's hopping. It's not dead, like Paris.

- It's a happening place. - Berlin's a party town.

I love to party. I'm all about clubbing and partying.

There's the Panorama, the Maria,

the Watergate...

People fly in on EasyJet on Friday night,

spend the weekend at the clubs

and leave Monday morning, totally fried.

- It's like a party marathon. - Exactly.

So come!

I don't know... Can I stay with you?

Sure, no problem. I've got a big bed, a big apartment.

- Are you serious? - Yeah, come.

Is it still cool in September?

In August I'll be in Auvergne, at Manon's house, with the girls.

September's cool too.

We'll go to the lake. There are lakes near Berlin.

You can swim naked without feeling like a total criminal.

- It's great. - I get the picture!

Too cool.

When do you leave?

- For Berlin? - Yeah.

- Tomorrow. - Really?

This is the street.

Nice.

- We're almost there. - Say when.

See that guy, behind the guy in white?

- That's my boyfriend. - Your boyfriend?

Wanna get a drink? That was a short ride.

- Ok, gun it. - Ok, head down!

- Where'll we go? - To the zoo, in Vincennes!

Ok.

Chloe?

Can you help me through the barbed wire?

I heard you.

I'm not a country girl either. Make an effort, for Manon's sake.

I'm hungry.

We'll eat after our walk. You'll survive, you're not a child.

Wait!

Lift it. I've got the dress.

Your sweater's caught. There, go ahead.

What a klutz.

Hey Toph, it's Lolo.

I was just wondering how you're doing.

Call me if you get a chance. Bye.

I'm starving, aren't you?

This is pretty.

So is this.

Come on!

Hurry up!

The lighter's not in the pack.

Where's the lighter?

Let's go.

I can't find the lighter.

- You guys bring the bag. - Huh?

No way!

Give me a smoke.

There's smashed tomatoes in my bag, dribbling down my legs...

- I don't want to be here. - I hear you.

It feels like everybody's pretending.

- I don't think they are. - You don't?

Manon's enjoying the hike.

Manon's a two-faced bitch.

- Let's split, then. - Ok.

Tomorrow, or the next day?

You'll come with me?

I'm not thrilled to be here either.

It's easy enough to leave, we just hop on the train.

I don't care how she's feeling, that's her problem.

I'm so exhausted. I don't feel guilty at all.

I don't care. Not one bit.

I don't think she's doing so well herself.

No doubt about it! But I couldn't care less.

I don't want to know.

Since I took her place, she's been distant.

- You didn't take her place. - That's how she sees it.

I don't resent her for leaving.

Still, I think leaving the Ranch was hard for her.

We're just an old couple falling apart at the seams.

When you're on vacation, you don't sulk all day

and act passive-aggressive.

We're her friends, she feels she can be herself.

She's bringing the whole mood down to get attention.

It's unacceptable.

She's being a drama queen.

She's milking it for all it's worth.

We don't know how she feels.

I don't feel great either, but I don't impose that on you.

I don't dump my shit on you guys to make you feel bad.

I know you're all bored here.

It hurts my feelings, but I don't say anything.

She could go back to Paris and leave us in peace.

That would be better than staying and moaning

that the mountains, my picnic and the hard-boiled eggs are all shit.

That's just it, Manon!

She's your friend, she's being real. If she's bored, she's bored.

If the hard-boiled eggs piss her off, she won't pretend they don't.

I'm sorry, but when you're in a group,

you try not to make the other people feel like shit all the time.

You guys are being really harsh.

Got a light?

Tough climb?

- Is there a knife for the bread? - Here.

With the salami.

Who wants an egg?

Break a leg!

There's not even a cutting board.

Want an egg, Pam?

Cut it on my ass, it's so hard!

Pass me the Saint-Nectaire.

Who wants an egg?

Egg toss, catch.

Fucking hell! I don't believe this.

Who is it?

Bart... denied.

- Bart the butthead. - Is he your boyfriend?

I'm single.

Bart and I are history.

Hi, Manon!

- Who are the gnomes? - They have a dog!

My dad's cousin's kids.

Can we get the salt?

Don't throw it!

She's got a Romeo and Juliet T-shirt!

- What'd you say? - Come closer, bitch!

I don't wanna.

- Who's your boyfriend, Malina? - I don't have one.

Favorite star?

- What's so funny, Antoine? - Nothing.

Could I get a little ham?

Your head's in a fog, huh?

Had a bit too much to drink?

- Is she bugging you? - A little.

Too much red wine?

Was it Bordeaux?

I'll give her some ice tea.

"It says "Baron de Lestac"..." It's Bordeaux.

Bordeaux, I thought so. Strong stuff, huh?

Let her do it!

I'll eat, that'll help.

- Want some water? - No.

Got a plate?

I can use this.

It's not very clean.

We need to do some dishes.

That'll be fine, with the sauce.

Mmm, looks good.

So, do you have a boyfriend?

Robert, I'm free as a bird.

Too bad I'm no spring chicken.

- My heart is taken, Uncle. - That's the way of the world.

And he's not just anybody.

Tell us more.

We want to know.

He's a singer.

Benji.

The one on TV.

He's your boyfriend?

You've got good taste.

Might as well pick a cute one.

He may be cute, but he shouldn't sing.

You old grouch.

He's not singing to you.

As long as Robert approves.

Is a singer ok, Robert?

- Planning on drinking a lot of that? - No, but...

- It makes you feel happy? - It's really good.

Think you can keep drinking when school starts again?

I'll have to be more serious then.

What are your plans?

My plans aren't so clear, I flunked all my classes last year.

I'm a little bit lost.

But I'm going to Berlin.

- Berlin? - Yeah.

Actually, I met a guy.

He lives in Berlin. He said I could stay with him.

He's very handsome.

You're going to explore new horizons.

- I don't know... - You don't know yet.

No. We'll see.

I've stopped questioning myself.

You have to question yourself.

She's gonna get a little Berliner.

A little Berliner, that'd be cool.

Is it Topher? Christopher?

Yeah!

Who's Christopher?

Her ex-boyfriend.

But apparently...

- They're still an item. - Yeah.

I'm not sure, but they've called each other twice now.

It's heating up again.

That's the Roche's place.

That's the church.

Hey, Gerard! How's it going?

Hello, there.

I'm bringing in the cows to milk.

- It's milking time? - Yeah.

- Give me a hand? - Sure.

You can round them up. You're not useless bums, are you?

Not at all.

Then let's go.

You're not getting out of this, you!

Hey, dumbbell! Get a move on!

Dumbbell!

Keep moving.

Look alive, dumbbell.

Pick up the pace.

We'll never get there at this rate.

There's work to be done.

My god!

Get back with the herd!

Come on, my little Normandy cows!

Come on!

Can I touch the bull's balls for luck?

Sure, go ahead.

- I wanna try! - Where've you been, Chloe?

Too cool.

Amazing.

Disgusting.

- It's hot. - Go on.

This'll help you and Topher get back on track, Lola.

Incredible!

It's almost the same!

Just kidding, it's not.

It's all over your hands.

I love it.

Gerard, why do you still do it by hand?

That's how I've always done it.

All my life. My parents milked by hand.

- Is it a question of ethics? - Not at all.

I've got a machine, but I never set it up.

- Is it better for the cows? - No.

Why aren't you with the others?

I don't really feel like it.

Why aren't you with the others?

I don't know.

This afternoon, I'm going to buy shoes.

Really?

- Where? - Clermont.

- Who's taking you? - Isabelle.

- Your aunt? - Yeah.

What kind of shoes?

Nike Air. White ones.

Sweet. You got a cool aunt.

- You're driving there? - Yeah.

Think I could ask her to drop me off in Clermont?

We'll have to ask, but it should be ok.

That'd be cool.

See you soon?

Yeah, probably. See you around.

Too bad you won't be here tonight.

You'll miss the hoedown!

Watch out, my hat!

Call me with the Topher update.

Ok. I'm seeing him tomorrow.

Are you getting your bags?

Yeah.

We're gonna go get them.

I'll get in this side cause there's a baby seat.

Don't forget to leave the keys.

- Don't take them. - We'll leave them under the rock.

Shall I run after the car?

We're throwing water, for luck.

Bye, have fun!

Bye, Manon, thanks!

Manon... you ok?

You ok, girl?

Let's spin this one again!

Arms in the air!

A sea of hands!

That's pretty.

Yeah, definitely.

- Wanna take a picture? - Yeah...

Want me to hold that, Toph?

This, too.

Nice camera. You're well-equipped.

Hang on.

You look beautiful.

To the right?

What'd she say?

The bathroom's over here...

Yeah, it's nice.

And this is Sarah's room...

That's kind of a laundry room.

I don't recommend going in there.

I'll show you later.

He's so good.

Isn't he gorgeous?

This is my room.

With a wall of suitcases.

Yeah, I did that. Like it?

Nice.

Best of all, the aquarium.

I've even got an aquarium.

You're into fish now?

Yeah, they're alright. They're my pals, I see them everyday.

I like them.

You put roses in two different vases?

Yeah.

Careful, that's bad luck.

Really? How so?

They say roses in different vases cause death in the family.

Really?

What are these scraps?

I wad up little paper balls...

Paper balls!

On the suitcases, they make primitive calendars.

You know, the suitcases represent your emotional baggage!

Your past. And I've hung them on the wall.

Why is the wall leaning forward?

It goes with the whole concept.

Like your baggage is looming over you.

Threatening to crush you.

No, it's just for decoration.

- What? - It's great.

- Yeah, I like it. - Me too.

I really like it.

Subtitles by Julie Meyer and Sionann O'Neill

Subtitling TITRA FILM Paris