All language subtitles for The.Young.Offenders.S01E00.Christmas.Special.WEBRip.H264-RBB
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Filipino
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hindi
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Igbo
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Javanese
Kannada
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Malayalam
Maltese
Maori
Marathi
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese
Punjabi
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Sundanese
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Tamil
Telugu
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Xhosa
Yiddish
Yoruba
Zulu
Odia (Oriya)
Kinyarwanda
Turkmen
Tatar
Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,999 --> 00:00:08,998
INSTRUMENTAL:
We Wish You A Merry Christmas
2
00:00:08,999 --> 00:00:11,999
How are you? You look nice.
Happy Christmas, love.
3
00:00:15,162 --> 00:00:18,227
You look gorgeous
in your Christmas jumper.
4
00:00:18,229 --> 00:00:19,837
Gwaaar! Go on to fuck!
5
00:00:19,839 --> 00:00:24,225
For subtitling services, contatct:
waqas.zahoor89@gmail.com
6
00:00:24,227 --> 00:00:26,226
I love your Christmas hat,
it's gorgeous.
7
00:00:26,227 --> 00:00:27,227
CLAMOURING
8
00:00:30,227 --> 00:00:31,361
No, no!
9
00:00:34,227 --> 00:00:35,227
CLAMOURING
10
00:00:35,228 --> 00:00:37,226
Where's your proof of purchase,
you fucking prick?!
11
00:00:37,227 --> 00:00:39,226
Watch his fucking back, will you?
12
00:00:39,227 --> 00:00:41,226
Happy fucking Christmas.
13
00:00:41,227 --> 00:00:43,226
# Repeat, repeat, repeat
Repeat the sound of joy
14
00:00:43,227 --> 00:00:45,360
# Repeat, repeat, repeat
Repeat the sound of joy
15
00:00:45,361 --> 00:00:48,226
# Repeat, repeat
# Repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat
16
00:00:48,227 --> 00:00:49,360
# The sound in joy. #
17
00:00:49,361 --> 00:00:51,495
That was a load of bollocks!
18
00:00:59,895 --> 00:01:03,226
Christmas is a time for giving,
but when you've got fuck all,
19
00:01:03,227 --> 00:01:05,227
it's also a time for taking.
20
00:01:08,752 --> 00:01:11,752
Take it easy, you're getting pine
needles all over the new carpet!
21
00:01:11,754 --> 00:01:15,753
Would you stop going on about
their new carpet?
22
00:01:15,754 --> 00:01:17,753
But it's cream.
23
00:01:17,754 --> 00:01:18,754
I'm taking off these plastic bags.
24
00:01:20,754 --> 00:01:22,289
Not until we're outside.
25
00:01:29,754 --> 00:01:30,754
HE GRUNTS
26
00:01:30,755 --> 00:01:33,753
TREE PLAYS CHRISTMAS CAROL
27
00:01:33,754 --> 00:01:35,754
You had one job.
28
00:01:38,754 --> 00:01:40,753
It's the perfect time for me
and Jock to be doing house calls,
29
00:01:40,754 --> 00:01:43,753
because there's a film being shot
in the city and the whole of Cork
30
00:01:43,754 --> 00:01:46,753
is off trying to get selfies with
your man Robert Sheehan.
31
00:01:46,754 --> 00:01:49,154
I'm going through a crowd of fans
at the moment.
32
00:01:49,155 --> 00:01:50,753
Yeah, they're really annoying.
33
00:01:50,754 --> 00:01:53,753
SCREAMING
34
00:01:53,754 --> 00:01:56,753
OK, I'm only going to do this once.
You ready?
35
00:01:56,754 --> 00:01:57,754
CHEERING
36
00:01:58,754 --> 00:02:00,753
SCREAMING
37
00:02:00,754 --> 00:02:02,570
SHE SOBS
38
00:02:02,572 --> 00:02:04,636
Do you think you were the right
actor to play this character,
39
00:02:04,637 --> 00:02:06,193
seeing as you are not gay?
40
00:02:06,195 --> 00:02:07,478
Oh, well, I am gay.
41
00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:09,479
I'm gay for women,
I think about women
42
00:02:09,480 --> 00:02:12,479
in the same gay way
that gay men think about... gays.
43
00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:15,479
And you'll never guess
who's been hired for security.
44
00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:17,479
Stand back! Billy Murphy.
45
00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:20,479
The film producers figured
if he was working on set,
46
00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:21,480
at least he wouldn't be breaking in.
47
00:02:21,481 --> 00:02:24,479
I will fucking punch you. Get back!
48
00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:27,281
All in all, it doesn't seem
very Christmassy this year.
49
00:02:27,282 --> 00:02:29,479
Might be something to do with
our housing estate
50
00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:32,014
being more like Armageddon.
51
00:02:32,015 --> 00:02:33,880
It's been non-stop with protesters,
52
00:02:33,881 --> 00:02:36,480
and half of them are only there
to get on the telly.
53
00:02:36,481 --> 00:02:39,479
It's been 30 days since
the residents of what's been dubbed
54
00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:42,479
the Real Capital of Cork -
or Real COC for short -
55
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:44,479
barricaded themselves
in their council estate,
56
00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:46,479
creating their very own hard border.
57
00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:48,613
The guards are struggling
to keep control.
58
00:02:48,614 --> 00:02:52,479
Only residents and food deliveries
are allowed past the barricades.
59
00:02:52,480 --> 00:02:55,014
Who ordered Szechuan
duck and chicken balls?
60
00:02:55,015 --> 00:02:56,479
That's me, that's me!
61
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,479
I paid by card.
62
00:02:58,480 --> 00:03:00,479
Building repairs, me fucking hole!
63
00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:03,479
The authorities offered the same
upgrade to the housing estate over,
64
00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:04,480
but once they got everyone out,
65
00:03:04,481 --> 00:03:06,479
they demolished the lot of it.
66
00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:09,479
That's not going to happen to us.
These houses are perfectly fine.
67
00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:11,147
KNOCK ON WINDOW
68
00:03:11,148 --> 00:03:13,479
Mam, the weird smell's there again!
69
00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:15,479
Is the canary still alive? Yeah.
70
00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,479
Then stop worrying about it.
Jesus.
71
00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,479
Just cos some langer
in City Hall thinks our houses
72
00:03:20,480 --> 00:03:22,880
Aren't good enough
for his safety standards.
73
00:03:22,881 --> 00:03:26,479
CROWD AGREES
74
00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:29,479
Like, what would them firemen
be doing if they weren't
75
00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:31,479
putting out our fires anyway?
Ever think about that?
76
00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:33,747
CROWD AGREES
77
00:03:33,748 --> 00:03:36,479
SHE COUGHS
78
00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:38,479
You OK? I'm fucking fine.
79
00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:40,481
SHE COUGHS
80
00:03:41,748 --> 00:03:44,479
EXCLAMATIONS OF DISGUST
81
00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:46,281
Do you have a hanky, no?
82
00:03:46,282 --> 00:03:49,281
Mam has a hard-on for
everything Christmassy,
83
00:03:49,282 --> 00:03:52,282
but she's always been too broke
to get a real Christmas tree.
84
00:03:53,881 --> 00:03:55,015
It's lovely.
85
00:03:56,480 --> 00:03:57,880
# ..happy new year. #
86
00:03:57,881 --> 00:03:59,147
What the fuck?
87
00:03:59,148 --> 00:04:00,479
# We wish you a merry Christmas... #
88
00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:01,613
Why three Christmas trees?
89
00:04:01,614 --> 00:04:04,282
They say you can't get oil
past the barricade.
90
00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:07,747
We're going to line them up
like the Christmas tree...
91
00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:09,480
Christmas trees.
92
00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:14,479
Ah! Fucking hell!
93
00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:16,480
Ha-ha! Ha-ha!
94
00:04:16,481 --> 00:04:18,479
You can't do that.
95
00:04:18,480 --> 00:04:22,480
Burning Christmas trees
is like burning Christmas.
96
00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:27,281
Did you get to the doctor?
97
00:04:27,282 --> 00:04:29,479
What's he going to tell me
that I don't already know?
98
00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:31,479
Stuff about medicine.
99
00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:32,480
Fuck that.
100
00:04:33,480 --> 00:04:36,479
FLINT STRIKES REPEATEDLY
101
00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:38,479
Fucking thing. Give me that fag.
102
00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:40,479
Are you sure you should be smoking?
103
00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:43,479
It'll help bring up the phlegm.
That's true, actually.
104
00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:44,480
Sure, when you walk around,
105
00:04:44,481 --> 00:04:47,479
you always see people smoking
and coughing.
106
00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:51,480
SHE COUGHS
107
00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:54,613
SHE COUGHS
108
00:04:54,614 --> 00:04:56,479
Mam!
109
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:59,613
Are you OK, Mam? Mam!
110
00:04:59,614 --> 00:05:03,479
Everybody, get out the fucking way!
NOW!
111
00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:05,015
CLAMOUR
112
00:05:11,282 --> 00:05:14,479
Only one of you can travel with her
now, lads.
113
00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:17,147
I never understood what
an ambulance chaser was until now.
114
00:05:17,148 --> 00:05:20,480
SIREN
115
00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:30,480
SHE COUGHS
116
00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:34,480
It says here she's doing phenomenal.
117
00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:38,480
It says "pneumonia".
118
00:05:40,015 --> 00:05:42,480
SHE COUGHS
Is she going to be OK?
119
00:05:44,282 --> 00:05:45,480
It's not looking good.
120
00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:50,479
The pneumonia has done
severe damage to her lungs,
121
00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:52,480
and the smoking hasn't helped.
122
00:05:57,480 --> 00:06:00,479
We can't just stand round here
and watch my mam getting more sick.
123
00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:03,479
The most important thing
is to help lift her spirits.
124
00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:06,480
Being in hospital over Christmas
is going to be really tough.
125
00:06:06,481 --> 00:06:09,147
I'll pick us up
something to eat, yeah?
126
00:06:09,148 --> 00:06:10,282
Happy meal?
127
00:06:15,481 --> 00:06:22,480
SOMBRE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC:
We Wish You A Merry Christmas
128
00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:26,148
Mam, you need something
to lift your spirits.
129
00:06:27,481 --> 00:06:29,479
What would you like?
130
00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:30,480
Yeah, we...
131
00:06:31,881 --> 00:06:33,480
..we'll get you whatever you want.
132
00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:39,480
SHE MUMBLES
133
00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:45,480
Sorry, I didn't quite get that one.
134
00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:49,480
I've never seen a white Christmas.
135
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:54,480
Hey.
136
00:06:55,480 --> 00:07:00,480
Are you sure there's nothing else
that might lift your spirits?
137
00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:03,479
Like... A bike.
138
00:07:03,480 --> 00:07:04,480
Aye.
139
00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:07,480
We could get you a bike. Yeah.
140
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,282
Just whisper the make and model.
141
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:18,480
No.
142
00:07:44,282 --> 00:07:46,480
Ho-ho-ho, Merry Christmas!
143
00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:51,881
I fucking hate Christmas.
144
00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:56,479
Who's all that crap for, anyway?
145
00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:59,414
Conor and Jock.
I bought presents for them?
146
00:07:59,415 --> 00:08:02,479
We'll need to drop it off to their
house on the way home. Not a hope.
147
00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:04,281
Their estate's like a war zone.
148
00:08:04,282 --> 00:08:05,479
OK, we'll walk.
149
00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:07,614
Enda, did you bring your rape alarm?
Yep.
150
00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:10,480
Fine.
151
00:08:11,748 --> 00:08:13,479
Don't worry about it.
152
00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:16,479
I'll do everything I'm told,
because it's not about me,
153
00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:19,014
it's about my money for Christmas
on people I don't even like.
154
00:08:19,015 --> 00:08:20,479
That's what this is about.
155
00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:23,479
I'll get you close. You can
fuck the presents over the wall!
156
00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:25,480
Barry, stop being a prick.
157
00:08:25,481 --> 00:08:26,747
What?
158
00:08:26,748 --> 00:08:28,479
You can't even get in.
159
00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:29,480
I know a way.
160
00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,480
You're going to break
the fucking thing, Barry.
161
00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:42,613
When you've got one dead parent,
and another nearly dead parent
162
00:08:42,614 --> 00:08:45,479
in the hospital, the last thing
you need is optimism.
163
00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:47,481
There's actually lots of
successful orphans in the world.
164
00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:51,479
Like Batman.
165
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:53,281
I'm not an orphan.
166
00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:54,480
Well, what are you
getting angry at me for?
167
00:08:54,481 --> 00:08:56,480
I'm just trying to comfort you.
168
00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:02,148
Superman. Stop it.
169
00:09:03,748 --> 00:09:05,480
Harry Potter. Quit it.
170
00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:12,479
God.
171
00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:14,480
He's the ultimate orphan.
172
00:09:15,480 --> 00:09:16,480
And very successful.
173
00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,881
Hey! We could try praying
to Him first, no?
174
00:09:31,282 --> 00:09:34,479
The Lord God
works in mysterious ways.
175
00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:37,480
Lads, get a load of
this fucking prick.
176
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:43,479
ON IPAD: Why did you choose
to film in Cork city?
177
00:09:43,480 --> 00:09:46,147
Well, we needed a lot of
weird-looking background people,
178
00:09:46,148 --> 00:09:48,480
and Cork has a lot to offer
in this area.
179
00:09:50,748 --> 00:09:53,480
Could you point that thing
in a different direction, please?
180
00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:10,479
Here. We'll give you
the phone unlocking code
181
00:10:10,480 --> 00:10:13,480
after you tow the snow machine
to the hospital.
182
00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:16,479
And how are you going to
get it out of there?
183
00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:19,479
That church is like Fort Knox
since they started filming there.
184
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:22,479
We know this place better than
we know our own dicks.
185
00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:25,479
We break in to drink the altar wine.
186
00:10:25,480 --> 00:10:28,480
And this time, we know
a guy on the inside.
187
00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:34,479
Explain it to me again.
188
00:10:34,480 --> 00:10:36,479
It's a coin-toss competition.
189
00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:37,613
Best of five.
190
00:10:37,614 --> 00:10:41,479
If we win, you let us in
and turn a blind eye.
191
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:43,613
What do I get if I win?
192
00:10:43,614 --> 00:10:45,880
The knowledge that you won.
193
00:10:45,881 --> 00:10:48,479
What more could you want
than the winning feeling
194
00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:50,479
of a coin-toss competition?
195
00:10:50,480 --> 00:10:52,480
You'd be king of the tossers.
196
00:10:53,881 --> 00:10:55,479
Are you fucking serious?
197
00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:58,479
King of the fucking tossers.
198
00:10:58,480 --> 00:10:59,480
Fuck off.
199
00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:02,614
You can punch us.
200
00:11:03,748 --> 00:11:05,479
What the fuck?
201
00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:06,747
Do you want to help your mam or not?
202
00:11:06,748 --> 00:11:09,479
Well, obviously, but I bruise
like a fucking peach. Yeah,
203
00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:12,015
but you know the only thing he gets
a kick out of is inflicting pain.
204
00:11:14,480 --> 00:11:15,480
Fuck's sake.
205
00:11:16,881 --> 00:11:19,747
For every coin toss that you win,
206
00:11:19,748 --> 00:11:22,479
you get to punch one of us.
207
00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:23,480
Both of you.
208
00:11:23,481 --> 00:11:26,479
That's the deal. Fine.
209
00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:28,147
Has anyone got a coin?
210
00:11:28,148 --> 00:11:29,479
I've a chocolate one.
211
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,480
Do you mind if it's British?
212
00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:37,147
Heads.
213
00:11:37,148 --> 00:11:38,880
Thank fuck!
214
00:11:38,881 --> 00:11:40,014
My go.
215
00:11:40,015 --> 00:11:41,480
HE LAUGHS
216
00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:49,479
Tails.
217
00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:52,480
HE LAUGHS
218
00:11:53,481 --> 00:11:56,480
Arm. Leg.
219
00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:00,479
It's vitally important now
that you don't move,
220
00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:03,479
because I don't want to
hit you in the face.
221
00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:05,015
OK?
222
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:12,148
Ooh! Ow!
223
00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:16,479
That kind of stung.
224
00:12:16,480 --> 00:12:17,613
Ooh!
225
00:12:17,614 --> 00:12:19,015
All right?
226
00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:23,747
I once tried to give up gambling,
but I found it really difficult,
227
00:12:23,748 --> 00:12:27,479
because even when
you're not gambling... Argh!
228
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:28,480
..you're still KIND of gambling,
229
00:12:28,481 --> 00:12:30,479
doing things that
don't feel like gambling.
230
00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:32,613
Do you know what I mean?
Not really.
231
00:12:32,614 --> 00:12:35,281
Like, I once battered this fella,
232
00:12:35,282 --> 00:12:38,480
so I got sent away for a couple
of months to Cork Prison.
233
00:12:40,415 --> 00:12:41,747
But had I not stabbed him,
234
00:12:41,748 --> 00:12:45,479
I could be a fucking dentist now
or something.
235
00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:46,480
I won again!
HE LAUGHS
236
00:12:47,748 --> 00:12:49,480
It's my lucky day.
237
00:12:50,614 --> 00:12:53,014
Oh!
238
00:12:53,015 --> 00:12:54,480
Stomachs.
239
00:12:57,480 --> 00:12:59,147
BOTH: Ooh!
240
00:12:59,148 --> 00:13:00,282
THEY COUGH
241
00:13:01,282 --> 00:13:02,747
HE LAUGHS
242
00:13:02,748 --> 00:13:04,479
Whoo!
243
00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:07,479
If I get this now, this is going to
be three out of three.
244
00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:09,479
Just flip the fucking thing, yeah?
245
00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:11,479
All right. Relax.
246
00:13:11,480 --> 00:13:12,614
Jesus!
247
00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:20,479
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
248
00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:21,480
Whoa, whoa!
249
00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:26,480
I win.
250
00:13:28,415 --> 00:13:29,480
Fuck!
251
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:37,480
We need two people to replace those
actors who got pissed over lunch.
252
00:13:39,881 --> 00:13:43,480
Have any of you extras
got acting experience?
253
00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:48,481
Just get me two of
the weirdest-looking fellas here.
254
00:13:52,480 --> 00:13:54,479
Will they do? They're perfect.
255
00:13:54,480 --> 00:13:56,479
EXTRAS GROAN
256
00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:58,480
Right, you two, come with me.
257
00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:04,480
BACKGROUND CHATTER
258
00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:07,480
What the fuck? Fuck you!
259
00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:10,479
FUCK!
260
00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:12,480
GENERAL MOANING
261
00:14:12,481 --> 00:14:14,480
Get the fuck out...!
262
00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:22,479
The IFTAs will be BEGGING me
to take an award after this.
263
00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:23,881
Begging me on their hands and knees.
264
00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:34,479
Excuse me, Mr Sheehan.
265
00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:36,880
Don't talk to me.
266
00:14:36,881 --> 00:14:39,480
I think he's acting.
HE INHALES
267
00:14:39,481 --> 00:14:43,479
Are you acting? Shush, please.
268
00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:44,880
Thank you.
269
00:14:44,881 --> 00:14:47,147
Five minutes, everyone.
270
00:14:47,148 --> 00:14:49,479
I took two sources of inspiration
for this scene.
271
00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:52,479
The original movie, Alien -
"Argh, argh!" -
272
00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:57,479
and this old Maltese lady
who was having an asthma attack.
273
00:14:57,480 --> 00:15:00,479
And she was making
the most fascinating sounds.
274
00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:03,479
Strange, like...
HE GASPS
275
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:06,479
That's where it comes...
That's where the noise...
276
00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:07,480
Wow. Yes, indeed it does.
277
00:15:07,481 --> 00:15:09,880
Ah, you can hear the Maltese
in that.
278
00:15:09,881 --> 00:15:11,479
Yeah - thank you.
279
00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:14,479
So good. Yeah, so good. Maltese.
280
00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:17,747
You can hear it, like, yeah,
it's Maltese. Yeah, yeah.
281
00:15:17,748 --> 00:15:21,479
That's more just
someone doing a lisp.
282
00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:22,480
Yeah.
283
00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:26,747
Any tips?
284
00:15:26,748 --> 00:15:28,479
Tips?
285
00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,479
Acting tips. It's our first time.
286
00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:33,479
What do you mean,
it's your first time?
287
00:15:33,480 --> 00:15:34,747
OK, let's start it up, please!
288
00:15:34,748 --> 00:15:39,479
Ah, ah, ah! Listen, whatever you do,
do not look into the camera.
289
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:43,281
OK? Great. You'll be great.
You'll be great. OK, great.
290
00:15:43,282 --> 00:15:45,479
All set. 342, take one.
291
00:15:45,480 --> 00:15:47,479
Argh!
292
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,479
And track.
293
00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:51,479
HE GASPS
294
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:52,480
Action.
295
00:15:52,481 --> 00:15:55,479
Argh!
GUNSHOT AND GASPING
296
00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:59,613
I fear this fight may be at its end.
297
00:15:59,614 --> 00:16:04,479
Those soldiers may slash my flesh,
298
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:08,479
but God is my only judge.
299
00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:09,480
HE GASPS
300
00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:14,480
Promise me one thing.
301
00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:18,147
You have our word.
302
00:16:18,148 --> 00:16:20,479
You're looking straight
into the camera.
303
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,613
Can we reset, please?
304
00:16:22,614 --> 00:16:24,747
What did I just say?
305
00:16:24,748 --> 00:16:26,479
Don't look at the camera.
306
00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:27,480
And what did you do?
307
00:16:29,015 --> 00:16:30,479
I looked at the camera.
308
00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:32,479
Yeah.
309
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:33,480
Sorry, Mr Sheehan.
310
00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:42,480
Those soldiers
may slash my flesh but God -
311
00:16:42,481 --> 00:16:45,480
God is my only judge.
312
00:16:47,148 --> 00:16:49,880
You've missed your mark.
You have our word.
313
00:16:49,881 --> 00:16:51,479
You've missed your mark.
314
00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:53,479
Your mark is here.
315
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,479
It's really, really simple.
316
00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:57,414
Don't look at the camera,
stay on your mark,
317
00:16:57,415 --> 00:16:59,479
concentrate, yeah?
318
00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:01,479
I really want to get it
on this next one, lads, OK.
319
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:04,479
Go for it, boy. I've got a good
feeling about this one, yeah?
320
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:05,480
Yeah, yeah.
321
00:17:09,282 --> 00:17:11,479
You have our word.
322
00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:14,479
He's reading his lines
off his fucking hand.
323
00:17:14,480 --> 00:17:16,479
Promise me one thing.
324
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:17,480
HE BELCHES
325
00:17:17,481 --> 00:17:18,881
Cut.
326
00:17:23,415 --> 00:17:27,480
Those soldiers may have
slashed my flesh, but...
327
00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,479
Cut to FUCK!
328
00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:32,480
Argh!
329
00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:44,014
Argh!
330
00:17:44,015 --> 00:17:45,480
Argh...
331
00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:49,747
God is my only judge!
332
00:17:49,748 --> 00:17:51,479
HE GASPS
333
00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:52,480
CONOR STIFLES A LAUGH
334
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:57,479
God is my only judge!
335
00:17:57,480 --> 00:17:58,480
HE GASPS
336
00:17:58,481 --> 00:18:00,015
STIFLED LAUGHTER
337
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:04,281
Sorry, boy, sorry, boy. We've got
this, we've got this. Right.
338
00:18:04,282 --> 00:18:07,414
Use a prop - use it.
339
00:18:07,415 --> 00:18:10,480
God is my only judge.
340
00:18:10,481 --> 00:18:12,479
HE GASPS
341
00:18:12,480 --> 00:18:14,479
LAUGHTER
342
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:16,748
STIFLED LAUGHTER
343
00:18:19,481 --> 00:18:22,479
I'm never going to get this out.
344
00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:23,480
HE GROANS
345
00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:25,480
CONOR AND JOCK LAUGH
346
00:18:25,481 --> 00:18:30,414
Can we please just get a bit
of professionalism around here?
347
00:18:30,415 --> 00:18:31,479
Aww...!
348
00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:32,480
Take 57.
349
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:37,479
I heard Robert Pacino say once
that great performances
350
00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:38,881
come out of pain and suffering.
351
00:18:40,015 --> 00:18:43,014
I'd like to think we had something
to do with helping Mr Sheehan
352
00:18:43,015 --> 00:18:44,479
get to that place.
353
00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:46,480
Promise me one thing.
354
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:50,015
You have our word.
355
00:18:51,480 --> 00:18:52,480
Find my mother.
356
00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:55,480
Tell her...
357
00:18:58,614 --> 00:19:03,014
Tell her how deeply sorry I am
358
00:19:03,015 --> 00:19:05,481
for leaving her in her time of need.
359
00:19:13,415 --> 00:19:14,480
HE GROANS
360
00:19:15,881 --> 00:19:17,479
And cut.
361
00:19:17,480 --> 00:19:20,480
Ohhh! Thank fuck for that!
362
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:24,480
Get out of my way, you two amateurs.
363
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:27,480
Argh!
364
00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:36,479
Hey, hey. We're coming.
We're coming.
365
00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:38,480
Just back it up to the gate.
366
00:19:45,480 --> 00:19:46,480
HE GROANS
367
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:54,480
HE GROANS
368
00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:58,415
All right, Billy.
369
00:19:59,881 --> 00:20:01,479
Heads or tails?
370
00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:02,480
Heads.
371
00:20:02,481 --> 00:20:03,747
HE GROANS
372
00:20:03,748 --> 00:20:05,415
Fuck this!
373
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:09,480
Over here.
374
00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:16,480
I'm sorry about this, lads,
but I take my job very seriously.
375
00:20:17,614 --> 00:20:19,480
THEY GROAN
376
00:20:21,415 --> 00:20:23,480
THEY COUGH
377
00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:28,479
What would you be doing
with a snow machine, anyway?
378
00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:30,479
You can't sell snow.
379
00:20:30,480 --> 00:20:32,480
It melts.
380
00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:36,415
It's just my mam's not well.
381
00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:40,480
And the doctor's saying
she might not make it.
382
00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:46,414
You see, she's always wanted
to see a white Christmas.
383
00:20:46,415 --> 00:20:48,480
We were just trying
to do something for her.
384
00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:52,480
You know what?
385
00:20:52,481 --> 00:20:56,480
I was really sick
in hospital once.
386
00:20:58,415 --> 00:21:01,479
The only thing I wanted
was for someone to sit with me
387
00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:03,480
so I wouldn't be alone.
388
00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:06,614
But no-one came.
389
00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:11,480
Who's sitting with your mum
right now?
390
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:15,480
No-one.
391
00:21:18,415 --> 00:21:19,479
Lads, get the fuck out of here
392
00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:22,480
before I kick the living shit
out of you again.
393
00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:26,480
Thanks, Billy. Thanks, Billy.
394
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:31,014
And tell your mam
I was asking for her.
395
00:21:31,015 --> 00:21:32,480
Yeah.
396
00:21:47,148 --> 00:21:48,480
We tried our best, Mam, but...
397
00:21:52,748 --> 00:21:55,147
What an awful Christmas!
398
00:21:55,148 --> 00:21:57,479
Don't worry about it.
399
00:21:57,480 --> 00:21:59,479
The traffic is very bad.
400
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:01,479
Yeah.
401
00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:05,479
I'll see you when I see you,
all right?
402
00:22:05,480 --> 00:22:06,480
Merry Christmas, son.
403
00:22:06,481 --> 00:22:09,415
Merry Christmas, boy.
404
00:22:10,480 --> 00:22:13,147
I think for every time one of us
has a nice Christmas,
405
00:22:13,148 --> 00:22:16,414
someone else out there
is having a shit one.
406
00:22:16,415 --> 00:22:17,479
Hiya. Hello.
407
00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:19,479
Hey, just thought
we'd come over and say hi.
408
00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:22,479
I'm Conor, this is Jack.
Conor.
409
00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:24,479
Hello, Jack. I'm Francie.
Thanks for calling over.
410
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:27,479
Pleased to meet you, boy.
I like your eyebrows, kid.
411
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:30,479
Oh, yeah? Have you got a razor?
I could do yours for you.
412
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:32,479
Go away. You're joking me.
413
00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:34,479
THEY LAUGH
414
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:36,480
Do you want...? What would I be like
with one of them?
415
00:22:36,481 --> 00:22:38,281
KNOCK AT DOOR
416
00:22:38,282 --> 00:22:39,479
A hospital is the one place
417
00:22:39,480 --> 00:22:41,479
where a stranger will never
tell you to fuck off.
418
00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:42,480
Ssh, ssh!
419
00:22:43,881 --> 00:22:46,147
Good morning, doctor.
SHE LAUGHS
420
00:22:46,148 --> 00:22:47,479
They'll all be happy to see you.
421
00:22:47,480 --> 00:22:49,480
THEY LAUGH
422
00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:55,479
You can even go up and hug
someone you never met before
423
00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:57,479
and they'll be grateful for it.
424
00:22:57,480 --> 00:22:59,480
HE SOBS
425
00:22:59,481 --> 00:23:01,479
Bang. Boom.
426
00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:05,479
An old handshake or even
a pat on the back in person
427
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:08,479
will mean more than getting
some shitty gift in the post.
428
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:10,479
Stay still. Am I plucked?
429
00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:14,414
THEY CHEER
430
00:23:14,415 --> 00:23:18,479
And doing something that might only
take a minute out of your day
431
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:21,480
could last a lifetime
in the memory of someone else.
432
00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:26,479
ALL: Santa is a fanny!
433
00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:30,281
Get away from me.
You need to get back into bed.
434
00:23:30,282 --> 00:23:31,614
Get off me. Mairead, listen.
435
00:23:32,481 --> 00:23:35,479
Whoa! Whoa!
436
00:23:35,480 --> 00:23:36,480
Get back.
437
00:23:36,481 --> 00:23:38,479
I'll fucking do it.
438
00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:41,479
Oh! Aww, Jesus!
439
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:44,479
Sorry. What's going on?
I want to go home.
440
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:47,281
She needs full-time
medical supervision.
441
00:23:47,282 --> 00:23:48,415
Argh!
442
00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:51,479
Everyone.
443
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:52,480
Let's be civilised.
444
00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:59,747
Look, you might know about sickness,
you might know about medicine -
445
00:23:59,748 --> 00:24:04,147
but I know my mam, and she wants
to be home for Christmas,
446
00:24:04,148 --> 00:24:06,148
and that's where she needs to be.
447
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,480
I don't even know who owns this.
448
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:22,480
HUBBUB
449
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:26,480
Right, come on, then.
450
00:24:28,015 --> 00:24:29,880
What's she doing out of hospital?
451
00:24:29,881 --> 00:24:32,480
Nice to fucking see you, too.
Come on.
452
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:38,479
Can we get some help here, please,
lads? Sick mammy coming through!
453
00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:41,147
Mothers spend their whole lives
looking after other people,
454
00:24:41,148 --> 00:24:43,479
so when one of them gets sick,
everyone knows it's time
455
00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:45,480
to put their differences aside.
456
00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:56,480
Could you stop here
for a second, please?
457
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:00,613
One second.
458
00:25:00,614 --> 00:25:04,479
INDISTINCT CHATTER
459
00:25:04,480 --> 00:25:07,479
Driver, can you get us to
the other side of that barricade?
460
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:09,479
Not a bother, boy.
461
00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:11,479
Are you still there?
462
00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:14,479
Yeah. I think I just figured out
our publicity campaign.
463
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:15,748
Driver, chop-chop.
464
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:20,479
It's been two hours.
465
00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:23,479
We're never getting out of
this war zone of a housing estate.
466
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:25,479
I told you not to come this way.
467
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,148
Concentrate. Stop.
Brake, brake, brake!
468
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:41,147
Oh, that's great. He'll gallop off
now and tell everyone we're here.
469
00:25:41,148 --> 00:25:43,479
In our neighbourhood,
the riot police usually only turn up
470
00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:45,479
at good birthday parties.
471
00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:47,479
SHOUTING
472
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:50,147
'Reinforcements are being
sent in to help the Gardai
473
00:25:50,148 --> 00:25:51,479
'dismantle the barricades.'
474
00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:54,479
Everyone, let's do this peacefully.
475
00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:56,479
We're all people of Cork here.
476
00:25:56,480 --> 00:25:58,479
You can take our land,
477
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:03,479
but you'll never take our FREEDOM!
478
00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:04,480
Come on!
479
00:26:04,481 --> 00:26:06,479
Aw - for fuck's sake!
480
00:26:06,480 --> 00:26:07,747
'The actor Robert Sheehan
481
00:26:07,748 --> 00:26:11,479
'has come to show his support for
the Real Capital of Cork,
482
00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:14,613
'and it appears he has watched
Braveheart one too many times.'
483
00:26:14,614 --> 00:26:18,480
CHEERING
484
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:31,281
Long live the Real fucking Capital
of Cork!
485
00:26:31,282 --> 00:26:33,747
I'm not fucking going anywhere.
This is my fucking home.
486
00:26:33,748 --> 00:26:37,479
Fuck off, you fucking liar.
Get your fucking hands off me!
487
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:40,281
Fucking hell!
Get your fucking hands off me!
488
00:26:40,282 --> 00:26:43,479
Get your fucking hands
off my sister. She's dyslexic!
489
00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:47,281
Right, which house is theirs?
And let's get the fuck out of here!
490
00:26:47,282 --> 00:26:48,480
It's that one there.
491
00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:52,480
Jesus Christ!
492
00:26:54,148 --> 00:26:56,479
Right, whoever did that,
you own up straightway
493
00:26:56,480 --> 00:26:58,281
or I'm calling the Gardai.
494
00:26:58,282 --> 00:27:00,479
Mentioning the Gardai
is one idiotic thing to do
495
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:03,147
with this shit going on
around the corner.
496
00:27:03,148 --> 00:27:05,480
HUBBUB
497
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:10,479
OK. Which one of you was it?
498
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:12,479
Get back in the fucking car.
499
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:14,748
Get back in the fucking car, Bobby.
500
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:29,748
There's only one tree left.
501
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:41,881
How about we burn
the kitchen chairs instead?
502
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:48,881
MAIREAD COUGHS
503
00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:52,479
COUGHING CONTINUES
504
00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:54,282
Keep calm.
505
00:27:57,480 --> 00:27:58,480
I am friends with a guard.
506
00:27:58,481 --> 00:28:00,479
Dad, don't fucking say that!
507
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:02,479
SCREAMING
508
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:03,480
SHOUTING
509
00:28:03,481 --> 00:28:05,613
Oh, fucking hell!
510
00:28:05,614 --> 00:28:07,479
SHOUTING
511
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:10,414
Ah, no, no! No, no, no!
512
00:28:10,415 --> 00:28:12,015
Fuck! Dad, do something!
513
00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:15,480
He's not rain, Barry!
514
00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:21,480
COUGHING
515
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,479
GASPING
516
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:30,014
She's having a seizure.
517
00:28:30,015 --> 00:28:32,747
Quick, just get something
for her mouth. To eat?
518
00:28:32,748 --> 00:28:34,613
No, like a wooden spoon
or something.
519
00:28:34,614 --> 00:28:37,480
That won't help - you just need to
wait for it to pass.
520
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:39,480
It's OK, it's OK, it's OK.
521
00:28:41,415 --> 00:28:42,880
SHOUTING
522
00:28:42,881 --> 00:28:44,479
Go home, everybody, go home.
523
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:45,480
This is our home.
524
00:28:45,481 --> 00:28:47,479
You, you fucking prick!
525
00:28:47,480 --> 00:28:50,479
SHOUTING
526
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:53,479
GASPING
Mam, can you hear me? Come on!
527
00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:54,480
Mam.
528
00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:57,480
Mam, come on, fuck that,
come on, please.
529
00:28:58,480 --> 00:29:01,282
SHOUTING
Everybody go home!
530
00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:06,479
This is our home!
531
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:09,747
Mam? Wake up, Mam. Come on, please!
532
00:29:09,748 --> 00:29:11,479
SHOUTING
533
00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:14,014
Calm down!
We're going to be all right.
534
00:29:14,015 --> 00:29:15,748
Mam, wake the fuck up, will you?
535
00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:20,613
I think you only realise
how important hope is
536
00:29:20,614 --> 00:29:22,480
when it's taken away.
537
00:29:26,614 --> 00:29:28,479
HUBBUB
538
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:31,480
Without hope, a community can be
torn to shit.
539
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:36,479
But if you gives someone hope...
540
00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:38,479
..even just the tiniest bit...
541
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:40,480
GASPS
542
00:29:42,480 --> 00:29:44,480
COUGHS AND RETCHES
543
00:29:48,015 --> 00:29:50,480
I'm just doing my job!
544
00:29:51,881 --> 00:29:53,614
Stop it! Stop it!
545
00:29:58,415 --> 00:30:00,282
Mam. What you looking at?
546
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:06,479
HUBBUB
547
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:08,481
CROWD QUIETENS
548
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:19,014
COUGHS
549
00:30:19,015 --> 00:30:22,148
Give her some space,
give her some space. You're OK.
550
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:25,480
Get away. It's OK, it's OK.
551
00:30:25,481 --> 00:30:27,481
I'll give you space.
552
00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:34,479
Girls, get back inside!
553
00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:35,481
Orla!
554
00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:49,480
It's snowing!
555
00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:02,481
TINKLING MUSIC PLAYS
556
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:13,480
INSTRUMENTAL:
We Wish You A Merry Christmas
557
00:31:34,015 --> 00:31:35,614
Happy Christmas, everyone.
558
00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:50,480
Happy Christmas to you, too, Mister.
559
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:54,480
Thank you. You're welcome.
560
00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:01,479
Maybe Christmas
IS a time for giving.
561
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:03,480
Even when you've got fuck all.
562
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:08,480
Bah, humbug.
47694
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.