Original subtitles

Subtitles downloaded from www.OpenSubtitles.org

[Takasaki Igu]

Good morning, Igu!

How do you eat so well?

Haru-san.

I'm leaving.

So cold!

I can't think of anything to draw forthe new storyboard.

But it's good that you slept well.

Your eyes are red.

You couldn't sleep again?

I'm fine.

0h your hair is curling up.

At the back.

Then...

See you later.

Have a nice day.

He forgot it.

Tsure!

Tsure.

Here, you forgot your cell phone.

Thanks.

What's wrong?

This is all stuff people don't need anymore.

It is trash after all.

There's even more now since the holidays are just over.

Tsure, your hair is still curling up.

See you.

I call my husband whom I've been married forfive years "Tsure."

"My S0 has got depression."

Translated by yuizaki_libra@livejournal Timed by bittersweet_bun@ourhour

Tsure is a very methodical person.

He makes his own lunchbox every morning...

...and chooses one type of cheese he likes for each day of the week.

He also has a set necktie to wearfor each day.

Since today is Monday, it would be Emmental cheese and blue necktie.

Hello. This is Web soft Laboratory Japan.

Yes. Please wait a moment.

0ne part of plug-in software is currently not working. Yes.

No, no...

No, I'm not saying that it's a low-quality product...

Tsuda-san.

Let me check.

Igu.

Isn't it nice to be you?

Come here.

Hah, caught you.

0uch ouch! 0uch!

Someone sent a claim addressed to you.

If possible, I'd like you to settle this just by phoning him.

If something like that is sent to our director, the audit team will learn about it.

I'm really sorry about this.

Yes. Takasaki? He's here. Please wait a moment.

Takasaki-san, you have a call on line 1.

Who's that?

"I'm sorry forthe trouble, but there is something I would like to inquire."

It's that usual whiny customer.

Thank you forwaiting. This is Takasaki from the support center.

I'm Mikami.

[Mikami Ryu]

Regarding the previous case, since there was no progress made through the phone,

I asked your directorto write me a letter.

Yes, with regard to that case, I sincerely thought that we should call to apologize to you...

I don't want you to apologize or anything.

Your company's products are user- unfriendly in the first place.

I already told your directorthat.

I'm sorry but I would like to ask one thing.

How is it that something like a computer can be this user- unfriendly?

Even that user manual too.

So many technical terms that I don't understand a thing.

I don't understand so I have to make this kind of phone calls.

Therefore, it is not my understanding that is the problem,

but the actual quality of the product, don't you think? Huh?

Takasaki-san?

Dear sir.

The characterforthe "taka" in my name...

...is not the one with the square, but the one with the ladder.

- Who cares about that now? - I do.

Since it's my name, I would feel really bothered if you get it wrong.

The character in my name Takasaki...

...is not the one with the square but the one with the ladder.

My job is to draw comics.

But I'm a little different from professional comic artists.

Professional comics authors produce a number of comic books.

They draw a lot and earn a lot of money.

Yes, this is the Takasaki residence.

Hello. I'm Kimizuka from Comic Bazaar. Is that Haruko-san?

Yes?

I have received your new storyboards. Please continue with this plot.

I got it.

Also, the results of the reader survey are out forthat and the previous edition.

As usual, they are really harsh.

0ur editor-in-chief told me to discontinue the series after next month's edition.

I asked him if we could wait and see if it'll get better, but he didn't listen.

I understand. Since that's what the readers want, I guess it can't be helped.

Ah~ I'm so sorry.

- Understood. - Alright.

This is awesome. The character is really interesting.

- Thank you. - It's really good.

Can I sit here?

So what did that whiny customer say?

He demanded us to produce a simple computerthat everyone can use.

He should ask Bill Gates that instead.

If he doesn't know how to use a computer, just don't use it.

Why must he call and complain about every single thing?

- Think with his own head before calling. - Don't badmouth customers.

0h right. What happened to Takano-san's farewell party?

I'll just reserve somewhere nearby through the Internet.

You can't just choose anywhere.

But don't you think it's just tiring to have so many farewell parties?

Yeah.

This.

It looks really good!

You can have it if you want.

- Are you sure? - I don't have any appetite.

- Yay! - Here. I haven't used them.

I don't like cheese.

- I'm diggin' in! - Sure.

[Monday, January 17] Got a call and was told that my series will be discontinued.

Must fix dinner.

Hah...

You know today, I got a call from the person-in-charge.

He told me that since the response is bad, my series will be discontinued.

I know it can't be helped,

but who in the world would break that kind of news through the phone?

For some reason I don't have any appetite.

I feel sluggish too. I'm just gonna take a bath and go to bed early.

You didn't catch a cold, did you?

What's wrong, Tsure?

Haru-san.

What?

I...

...can't make my lunchbox.

You forgot to start the timer forthe rice cooker?

That's not it.

What's the matter?

I can't do anything.

My head hurts.

I...

...want to die.

What do you mean you want to die?

You can't die with this.

You're just tired from work.

I have to go to work.

You should take a day off and go to the hospital.

I can't take a day off.

Then at least go to the hospital.

Can you go alone?

I'm alright.

[Psychosomatic medicine] Kamo Clinic

- Hello. - Hello.

Please have a seat overthere.

Sugiura-san, please enter the examination room.

Judging from the syndromes, typically it is depression.

Depression?

Please don't worry too much.

I believe you know about this, but depression happens when you have low spirits.

Normally people have mood swings,

but when one cannot stop feeling depressed by himself, that's when he has depression.

But um, I also often have back pain and headache.

Well, a lot of people think that...

...depression only has mental signs such as sleep disorder, fatigue and anxious feeling.

But in fact, it also shows physical syndromes such as stiff shoulders, joint pain, headache and nausea.

Takasaki-san, depression is also called "a cold of the heart."

Acold of the heart?

That's why there's no need to worry.

Taking medication can help suppress the syndromes.

We will solve the root problem little by little then.

Um, Sensei.

If I take medication, how long would it take for me to get cured?

This varies for different people, but even if the treatment goes smoothly,

it will one take half a yearto a year and a half to return to the normal condition.

Half...

...a year?

Hello?

Depression?

Yeah. That's what he said.

After getting my medication, I'll go to work.

What do you mean go to work? Just take the day off.

I can't do that.

He said that if I take medication, the syndromes will be suppressed.

I'm alright.

What do you mean you're alrig...

Give me some clear explanation.

Hello. Thank you.

Please keep this piece of paper and wait for a while.

Luvox* and flunitrazepam* huh? (* used to treat depression)

That doctor is really frank about the patient's illness. I'm sure you were shocked.

But well, being told frankly makes you feel more at ease than getting a half-baked answer.

But the medicines won't have any effect right away.

Sleeping pills help, though.

Sleeping pills?

Sleep- inducing drugs.

Sugiura-san.

[Depression]

Depression happens when the level of serotonin, a neurotransmitter in nerve cells,

...is so low that messages can't be passed well between the cells.

Then, can it be cured by medication?

But why did the serotonin level drop?

[Thursday, January 6] Tsure didn't have any appetite. We didn't eat and had a fight.

Thank you forthe food.

You only had one bowl right? I even made takikomi rice* foryou. (* rice seasoned with soy sauce and other ingredients)

But it's not that delicious.

Not that delicious? This is oyster, alright!

I don't really taste anything.

0h yeah? Then don't force yourself.

My dishes taste bad anyway. I'm not good at housework.

[Tuesday, January 11] Tsure complained of back pain without any reason.

- Haru-san. - Yes?

My back hurts...

What? Yesterday you said your hips hurt.

Because you listened to music untiI midnight.

When you catch a cold or have muscle pain, if you don't want to get better, you won't.

I can't sleep because you're snoring too loudly.

- It's been like this every night recently. - Sorry.

Can you go sleep in the next room?

0kay.

Sorry. I don't want you to be here today.

0h I see.

Hello? This is Kurita barbershop.

This is Haruko.

0h. You rarely call us at this time of the day.

Working hard, aren't you?

I'm reading your comics.

What? You're buying them? You could have told me to send them to you.

Well, I got them delivered here together with the comics we use in the shop.

- You don't have to buy them the month after next month. - You're sending them to me?

My series will be discontinued after next month.

- Discontinued? - Since it's not popular.

Really? I thought it was interesting though.

Thanks.

But well, the series looks like it's written by an amateur anyway. Don't worry about me.

How is Mikio-san?

Say...

...do you know what depression is?

Depression? I do. Why?

Seems that Tsure has got depression.

What should I do?

He must be really stressed from work.

You should help him take it easy.

So I should just act like normal and let him relax?

Yeah. Since he's got depression, don't make a big fuss when he's around.

Got it.

Thanks. Talk to you latter.

Something happened to Haruko?

Seems that Mikio-san's got depression.

- He's really serious, unlike Haruko. - Yeah.

Alot of things happen when he goes to work, I guess.

Let's see how things go.

You filled this up already?

Your handwriting is weird.

- Is it bad? - 0f course.

People who read this kind of comic books are young girls, right?

Yeah.

Then shall we buy another one?

What a waste.

Sorry.

[Comic magazine - February edition] [Monthly readers' survey]

Considering the current days, I should have used rounded handwriting instead.

You don't have any appetite today too?

Do you easily catch a cold?

Though I look like this, I've been training in gyms so I don't really catch a cold.

Did you catch a cold?

It's good for someone with depression to eat a lot of vegetables.

Didn't you tell me before to just act normal?

I don't want to buy vegetables cos they are always so heavy.

How on earth are they this heavy?

Hello.

Ah, hello.

- These winter camellias bloomed already. - Yeah.

0h, I have yourfavorite item in the store.

- Really? - Yeah.

But I'm busy today. I'll come when I have time.

- I'll see you soon. - See you.

Vegetables are really the foundation of good health.

Even Igu only eats vegetables.

Eat lots of vegetables.

Haru-san, isn't the deadline coming soon?

I don't care. It's gonna be discontinued anyway.

I know it's frustrating to have your series discontinued,

...but you should still work hard untiI the end.

There are people who look forward to reading your comics.

Nope, there are not.

That's why the response was so bad that my series got discontinued.

Always thinking only about the negative side of things...

...and giving up way too early is a bad habit of yours, Haru-san.

Ratherthan my job, please be concerned about your own body.

You're too busy from work. Why don't you take this chance and relax a little?

Sorry for having got depression.

But I'm really relieved to know what's been causing everything.

You couldn't sleep and had hips pain also because of that, right?

Sorry for not realizing it sooner.

Depression is like a cold of the heart; it will make everyone around suffer.

Afterthe restructuring, the number of employees has decreased.

If I take a break, the company will be in trouble.

But don't force yourself.

I understand my health the most.

Don't worry.

I'm digging in.

I'm digging in.

Chief, I have something to say. Could we go to the conference room?

Can't we just talk here?

If you have something to tell me, say it quickly.

I've got depression.

Everyone can get depression when work is this busy.

So stop complaining.

Work hard forthose who were retrenched too.

I can't do it.

It's a nikki sui* bottle produced in the Meiji era. (* cinnamon colored water)

So many air bubbles inside. It will make such a wonderful flower vase.

At that time, the art of making glass bottles was called glassblowing.

People used to blow one bottle by one bottle.

It may look unrefined due to its thickness,

but when you hold it in your hands, you can feel the unspeakable warmth.

- Do you like it? - Yes!

Ah... I'm so sorry for only buying the cheap ones.

Not at all.

When people like you are interested in all this old stuff, I'm really happy.

That bottle is merely a glass bottle...

...but it is here now because it wasn't broken.

It is here now because it wasn't broken.

There is value in things that are not broken?

- Haruko-san. - Yes?

Thank you.

I'm home.

Welcome back.

I'm so sorry. Today I was rushing to finish the script so I ordered sushi instead.

Sorry. I need to lie down a little.

Tsure.

Why don't you resign from work?

I can't do that.

Why can't you? Does work cure your illness?

You became like this because of work, you know?

- But... - But what?

But...

...if I resign now,

...it will cause everyone trouble.

You don't have to think about them.

Tsure.

There is value in things that are not broken.

If you don't resign from work,

I'll divorce you.

Don't fall apart, Tsure.

- Haru-san. - Hm?

Is this the right tie?

Today's Wednesday so that's the correct one.

Here you go.

How is my hair?

Um, looks good.

0kay. Then...

- I'll see you later. - Have a nice day.

You want to have a part-time job? What are you saying all of a sudden?

That's impossible, Takasaki-kun.

Well then, I guess there's no other choice.

[Letter of resignation]

- Let's go to the conference room. - I'm fine here.

You see...

Letter of resignation is usually handwritten.

Plus since you're an official employee here,

you have to hand in your resignation statement, not a letter of resignation.

Yes.

Done.

"I would like to resign by January 24."

Here it is.

Thanks foryourwork.

But you see, I'll be in trouble if you stop working right away.

You have to hand over your duties to someone.

You should know, right?

There's no mistake. Thank you foryour hard work.

Thank you so much. You have been a great help.

I'm sorry about what happened. If you have some interesting new idea, let's work together again.

Did I put my best into drawing this girl?

I always feel like this when I hand in my scripts.

Why am I never confident?

I'm just full of negative thoughts.

For someone who is pessimistic and lazy like me,

the only thing I became interested in was drawing comics.

After graduating from high school, I worked at the town where I was born.

The same thing just repeated every day.

"I want to become a comic artist!"

With that wish, I went to Tokyo to attend an art school.

To the pessimistic and lazy person that I am, that was the first adventure I ever had.

But the people I met there were only those who both have so much talent and confidence.

And just when I completely lost hope,

"You have the talent to draw comics that no one else has."

The person who told me that was Tsure.

I didn't know anything besides girls' comics,

and Tsure was the one who taught me that there are many other kinds of comics.

I wanted Tsure to praise my work, and continued to draw.

Lfinally had debut when my short comics published in a magazine.

But drawing comics couldn't coverthe living expenses.

We eventually got married.

"Haru-san, just draw manga. I'll take care of the living expenses."

That was Tsure's marriage proposal to me.

I could draw manga because there are Tsure and Igu by my side.

There are three ways to treat depression.

0ne is pharmacotherapy where medication can help suppress the symptoms.

Another is psychotherapy which improves the mental aspect of the illness.

Lastly, we have environmental control therapy in which one adjusts the environment...

...and interpersonal relationships that could be the cause of the illness...

But the best treatment is to take a break from everything.

Depression happens when there is a decreased amount of serotonin released from nerve cells.

That's why we have to increase that amount of serotonin.

Serotonin is made up of amino acid and tryptophan,

so you have to eat eggs and banana every day.

And...

...this.

Well, I can eat nattou*. (* food made from fermented soybeans)

You like it?

Yeah.

But since you hate it...

It stinks!

Can you stir it quietly?

I'm digging in.

The day he resigns from work.

Ah, Tsure! Wait for me!

You don't have to do what you can't.

When you don't feel well, just leave early.

Here, please take care of this.

Have a nice day.

Yes. This is Web soft Laboratory Japan.

Yes.

Takasaki?

He's taking a day off.

I'll try my best to assist you. Could you describe to me the specific malfunction?

Morning, Igu!

It's cold. Close the window.

Haru-san, it's winter now, isn't it? The air is cool and so refreshing.

Somehow I'm in a really good mood. Seems that the medicine's taking effect.

Really?

Haru-san, thanks for everything.

These are winter camellias? So pretty.

Good morning.

Lovely, aren't they?

- Here it is. - Thank you.

Sorry, the characterfor "taka" is wrong. It should have a ladder, not a square.

0h dear, I'm so sorry. I'll change it.

Ah, hello.

Seems that the medicine is taking effect. I'm feeling really well.

0h that's great. But you can't neglect it.

Depression is like a pendulum.

It will get better and worse many times before you gradually recuperate.

I'm done. Thank you.

Let's not rush things and just have you treated gradually.

Why don't you keep a journal?

Ajournal?

It's part of cognitive- behavioral therapy.

It helps one become aware of the fact that one's got depression and accept it.

Accept that I've got depression?

You can just simply write down your symptoms oryourthoughts or anything else really.

[Friday, February 18] [Lt's hard.]

Tsure.

Yeah?

Have you taken medicine?

Yeah.

Why must I feel so horrible now afterfeeling so well before?

You'll be well again soon.

Haru-san.

Hmm?

Maybe I'll keep being like this from now on.

That's why, Haru-san...

I want you to carry on your own normal routine.

If you get dragged into this whole illness of mine, you will become sick as well.

Asick person shouldn't worry about others.

It's alright.

Even if I force you to eat nattou, I won't eat it, so it's okay.

0h yeah?

"Now, you will feel well and then unwell."

What a bothersome illness.

- Good morning! - Good morning!

You don't have to go this early if you are meeting yourfriend later.

Since it's the last day, I want to take the train with you.

Thank you.

Let's go.

You did put up with this so well, didn't you?

Starting tomorrow you don't have to take this train anymore.

Thanks for everything you've done.

You really think so?

I do. You're great, Tsure.

I'm really happy...

...when you said that.

You don't have to cry, right?

I know, but...

I know, but...

Yes, this is Web soft Laboratory Japan.

Takasaki...

He's taking another call right now. I'll be glad to answeryour questions.

If it's that whiny customerfrom before, I'll talk to him.

Takasaki's just done with his call.

This is Takasaki speaking.

This is Mikami.

Sorry to botheryou, but there's something I'd like to inquire.

Someone told me the other day about this update, and I did it.

But then the whole thing just got worse.

I see. Could you tell me more about what happened?

This is me?

Yes.

So cute.

This is me.

- Next to you is "Tsure"? - Yes.

Looks like him.

I'm thinking it'd look good to scan this and put in the words in this format.

As expected of you, Haruko-san.

Though I'm in charge of our reunion, I'm totally bad at this kind of things.

Maybe we're not going this year.

You're not coming?

Yeah, I'm kinda busy with work.

I guess this will come to an end some day too.

It's a strange reunion after all. We all had ourwedding ceremony at the same time in the same church.

But it's not a bad idea to celebrate that time together once a year.

We were so happy then, weren't we?

This is the last time for us.

The last time?

We're getting a divorce.

I'm in charge of it this year, so we decided to part ways afterthe reunion.

That's why I wanted Haruko-san to illustrate this lovely invitation letter.

Well, a lot of things happen in five years.

Things will be tough from now on, but I'll just have to try my best.

Erm...

Thank you for everything.

Thank you for all the hard work, Takasaki-kun.

Things must be tough, but do your best.

- Thank you foryour hard work. - You too.

Thank you foryour hard work.

Tsure resigned from work.

I see. So you resigned from work?

You could have taken leave though.

My wife said she would divorce me if I don't resign.

You've got such a great wife.

I got depression because of my divorce.

When you have this illness and are all by yourself, sometimes...

...you will think that maybe it doesn't matter if you don't get cured at all.

It was from my office.

It must be scary when the phone suddenly rings.

- Takasaki-san? - Yes.

Yeah.

I got it.

He's getting better after resigning from work.

That's why you don't have to worry.

How about money? Are you good?

Yeah. I have unemployment insurance so I'm good for now.

If you have trouble with that, just call me.

Thanks.

Bye.

Fall more.

Fall more.

Snow falls and piles up.

The train has to stop.

There will be a power outage.

Everyone has to stop working.

I won't try hard.

- Here you go. Thanks. - Thank you.

Here. Thank you very much.

This place hasn't changed a bit.

When I faced upwards to have my beard shaved, I always stared at that stain on the ceiling.

So nostalgic.

What? 0ut of all things, you only miss this stain on the ceiling?

How's Haru-chan?

Thank God she is well. She's still drawing comics that can't sell.

Comics that can't sell? You're sure mean.

When you have time, come over. I'll cut your hair.

Thank you so much. Well then.

- Thanks, Toshio-kun. - Sure.

Do you think he'll succeed his father?

I don't know.

- But I'm glad he's well now. - Yeah.

I heard he resigned from his job in Tokyo and came back because he got depression.

What? Really?

0h I'm so sorry. Did I cut you there?

Tsure.

Here's your hot milk.

I'm so tired from not being able to sleep at night.

You don't have to go to work anymore, so why don't you take a nap?

It's impossible for me to sleep at noon.

I would feel guilty.

Guilty?

Before when you went to work, I always took a nap after lunch.

Look.

You just have to lie down like this and idle around.

Hey, come here.

Like this?

You're so stiff.

More like this...

This was all you did, Haru-san?

From time to time I would draw comics. I also do some housework.

Are you judging me?

Somehow...

...it feels like I'm being left behind.

I feel lonely...

Look at Igu! It's even more slovenly than I am.

Does Igu everfeel lonely?

Well...

Reptiles are cold-blooded.

I also want to turn into a reptile...

Get up.

If you turned into a reptile...

...it wouldn't be this warm here.

Amonth after he resigned from work.

Tsure blames himself for being useless. He would cry and apologize for everything.

[Friday, March 25] [I'm so sorry]

I'm such a useless owner.

I'm so sorry, Igu.

It's also my fault that Haru-san's comics don't sell.

I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry.

This has absolutely nothing to do with that.

When you're better, take me to Ryuuguujou*! (* Palace of the dragon god Ryuujin)

I was worried to hear that you resigned from work.

But you seem betterthan I thought.

- Here, have some tea. - Ah, thank you, Haruko-san.

Here you go.

What's that?

Hot milk. It's good forthis illness.

0h I see.

It must have been a very tough time foryou, Haruko-san.

Not at all.

He's been the meticulous kind every since he was small.

That's exactly why you got depression.

Well, just drink milk orwhatever helps and get better soon, foryourwife's sake.

- 0kay? - Yeah.

The man is the backbone of the family.

That's why as long as he thinks about his family, he'll be able to overcome anything.

My eldest kid is taking his entrance exam this year.

To be honest, it's hard to get him into a private school since ourfamily has too much debt.

But since our kid is trying so hard, we have to try our best to do something too.

Even the money to feed that lizard is by no mean negligible.

Right, Haruko-san?

What should I do?

It's impossible for me now.

I'm so useless.

I can't be as strong as you, Nii-san...

I only wish people would quietly give him support...

...instead of crushing his spirit even further.

[People who dislike reptiles are not welcomed]

Tsure switched completely from not being able to sleep to sleeping all day.

He would eat breakfast and then sleep.

He would eat lunch and then sleep.

He would have some snack in the afternoon and then sleep.

0f course he sleeps at night too.

260 thousand...

Haru-san.

Look, Tomo-chan is having her own exhibition.

Really?

You should go.

She was your classmate after all. You should go and congratulate her.

But...

I'll be sleeping so it's gonna be fine.

Then I guess I'll go.

Why do I feel so sleepy? It's as if I was under a witch's spell.

Like Cinderella?

The princess sleeps underthe witch's spell in "The Sleeping Beauty" by Tchaikovsky.

Whatever.

This is still betterthan you not feeling sleepy at all.

Thank you so much for coming.

- That was great. - Really? Thank you so much.

- All the best to you! - Yes please come again.

- Please have this if you'd like. - 0h thanks.

- Thank you. - Take care.

I'm back.

Tsure.

I'm just a nobody...

Doesn't that stain on the ceiling resemble Igu?

You were awake?

You're right.

It looks just like Igu.

I'm really grateful to you, Haru-san.

Sorry.

I can't do anything.

Why...

...did he commit suicide?

Seems that it's because he considered himself a useless human being.

For people with suicidal thoughts,

it's a dangerous time when they are about to get better.

I... cut his hairthe other day.

"The last time you cut my hair was when I was in high school."

"I feel refreshed," he told me.

He...

...was looking at that stain on the ceiling...

...and laughed so many times.

Tou-san.

Just think that...

...it was great that you could help him freshen up during his last moments.

0kay.

How is Mikio-kun?

He's gonna be alright. He has Haruko.

He's gonna be alright.

- Hello. - 0h, hello.

Those cherry blossoms bloomed so beautifully, didn't they?

They really did.

The spell has broken for our sleeping prince.

But he's still underthe spell named "depression."

Hey, think about what you enjoy doing.

- What are you thinking about? - About when I cook.

Cooking is fun foryou?

I want to eat my favorite dishes.

I also want to do laundry and some cleaning.

What~?

Since Haru-san is so bad at them.

Right?

My bad.

Then why don't you cook?

Haru-san.

You put too much salt.

I can't tell the taste anymore.

I didn't follow the recipe well and made this whole mess too.

I'm really useless after all.

That's not true. It's still so much betterthan what I make.

Even if you praise me like that, I don't feel happy at all.

How can you say that?

Depression is an illness that causes everyone trouble.

That's why people say it's like a bad cold.

If so, this illness is undeniably the kind of cold that space aliens would catch.

The cold of the whole universe.

When you get better, go fly in the sky.

[People who dislike reptiles are not welcomed]

Afterthat, 0tou-san tried to write like a young girl. The kind of rounded handwriting?

He imitated that.

"I'm truly looking forward to Takasaki-sensei's new series," he wrote.

- He really did it, didn't he? - Stop doing that. So embarrassing.

- These strawberries are delicious. Have some. - Yes.

Ah but I have to go to the hospital now.

0h I'm so sorry. I just kept rambling on about meaningless stuff.

That's not true. I had a lot of fun.

- Please make yourself at home. - Take one.

Ah then I'll have one. Thank you.

Have a good trip.

- Take care, okay? - Yes.

Here you go.

0h thanks.

- I'll be back soon. - See you later.

He seems much betterthan I thought.

Yeah. He's been well lately.

He'll gradually get better.

Even the sun extends the straw of a tatami mat one by one.

But...

I know this is hard to accept, but the scariest part comes when he's about to get cured.

You have to be careful when he shows signs of that.

You mean...

...he'll become suicidal?

Yeah...

I know.

I learned a bit from reading books.

The human heart is mysterious, isn't it?

It's also the first time for me at this age to think about what the heart is.

The person who made me ponder about all this is Mikio-san.

Lately, I've been thinking...

...not about the reason Tsure got depression...

...but the meaning behind his getting this illness.

You have...

...grown so much, haven't you?

Thanks.

0h?

What is this? Is this part of something?

The divorce takes up so much of my energy. I'm exhausted.

To think that this person doesn't have me in his heart anymore, somehow...

...it's like rejecting all the feelings we used to have for each other.

It was hard.

I have to do my best from now on.

You don't have to try so hard.

You don't have to try hard when things get tough.

Just stay the same way.

My husband's got depression.

But I have decided not to try my best.

It's really hard,

but I won't try my best.

What are you looking at?

0ur eyes met. It's so cute~

Aturtle keeps anotherturtle as a pet?

Did you say something?

Nope.

We can't rely on unemployment insurance forever. [Takasaki Chibi]

It's gonna be fine. I'll work.

What? You're gonna work part-time?

No. I'm gonna draw comics. That's what I love to do the most.

You said this to me before, didn't you? That I would be able to become a comic artist.

I'm afraid it would be hard for us to accept this.

This kind of character is not popular among our readers.

Hold on.

For example, the kind of character that we would want is...

- Something like this... - Sorry.

I can also help with the page for readers' submission. Will you let me do it?

What?

My husband's got depression.

Please give me work to do. Please help me.

My husband's got depression. Please give me work to do!

You really scared me when you suddenly said your husband's got depression.

I'm sorry.

The person I'm gonna introduce to you is my ex- boss.

- Here you go. - Thank you.

Actually, I also got depression...

...and got transferred from the department for comic magazine to here.

Are you all well now?

0f course I can't be as well as I was before.

Well, we have this handbook here...

...so you don't have to stress too much.

This is what we are publishing next.

You can say it's a book on self-enlightenment.

I would like an illustration for the beginning and end of each chapter.

To be frank, this kind of book used to be mocked at before.

But I came to understand this after going through the illness myself.

Books like this can help save a lot of people.

Will you accept this job?

0f course, please let me do it.

After Tsure got depression, it felt as if we were left behind by the society.

But that's not true.

The two of us not alone.

"My husband's got depression"? What? You really said that?

It was at the spur of the moment though.

Everyone must have judged you, right?

No, not at all.

It's embarrassing still.

You know, I'm glad I could say it.

Up untiI this point, I haven't been able to tell anyone.

I thought no one would be able to understand because people hold a lot of grudges against depression.

I didn't want people to pity us either.

But that wasn't it.

I hid it from everyone because I'm ashamed of the fact that you got depression.

That's why I'm really glad I could tell people...

...that you got depression.

Sorry.

You have grown strong, haven't you, Haru-san?

I will grow even strongerfrom here on.

Because we have Igu and Chibi here too.

Thank you.

Here. Help me clean this page.

[May]

Takasaki-san!

0ur company is gone.

Its parent company hasn't been doing well and withdrew. Its branches in Japan were dissolved.

When it comes to the push, foreign companies are indeed cruel.

You got better, didn't you, Takasaki-san?

Yeah... I looked horrible then.

That whiny customer...

...I wonder how he's managing.

Haru-san.

I was told that the company was dissolved.

You made the right choice of resigning then.

But it's kinda sad to think that everything I did there disappeared as well.

Company is company. It doesn't mean what you did was futile.

Yeah...

Haru-san, you should comb your hair.

I don't have time forthat now. Need to finish this last part.

Hey your name's printed wrongly here.

It's the character "Taka" with a square.

They should have checked for mistakes before sending this for printing.

Who cares about that kind of detaiI?

- That's not good. It's your name. - I got it.

- Really? - I said I got it.

You should call them before you forget.

I'm busy right now. I'll do that later.

You will just forget about this later.

If you care that much, then why don't you call them?

I...

I can't make phone calls.

If you can't then shut up!

Ah~ I'm done.

Tsure.

Tsure.

Tsure!

Tsure!

Tsure!

Just now...

...I felt as if...

...you were really far away.

And yet,

I just kept pestering you.

I really hated myself forthat.

No one will be bothered even if I disappear.

From time to time,

I just can't help...

...detesting the fact that I'm here.

My body became really restless.

I can't stand it.

Haru-san.

Is it really okay...

...for me to stay here?

It's okay foryou to be here.

Sorry, Tsure.

I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.

What are you looking at?

0h.

Freshwater shrimps.

They're cute.

You know, Sugiura-san.

I wanted to get cured for my wife whom I've caused to worry so much.

But now...

I want to get cured for my own sake and not anyone else's.

Yeah, this is cute.

Wow, they are really expressive.

- Thank you forthe hard work. - Thank you.

0h right. It should be the "taka" with a bridge.

We corrected your name on the cover. I'm so sorry forthe mistake.

- Not at all. Thank you so much. - Thank you.

But I hope you still work hard at comics too.

I'm not skilled enough to draw a proper series yet so they are not very good.

Not very good? Did the editor-in-chief say that?

Ratherthan the editor, it's like the readers don't seem to like what I draw...

An artist should draw what he truly wants to draw.

Sorry for my rude question, but was your previous series what you truly wanted to draw?

Editor-in-chiefs are good at telling what the artist feels about his works.

Kimizuka-kun must have thought so too.

The readers' survey is just an excuse.

Anyway, thank you forthis.

0h, what are you doing?

Just drawing what I want to draw.

This is interesting.

Four pages...

If you can draw 8 pages plus the cover page,

we can start the following month.

Are you serious?

Thank... Thank you so much!

Thank you so much.

I'll try my best.

What I want to draw is so nearby!

"I'm Fujii Yuka from Weather Report. Let's look at the weather in each part ofJapan."

"First of all, the Meiyu-Baiu frontal cloud area approaching Japan is expanding."

"This cloud zone is expected to stay nearJapan for some time."

People say that depression is largely affected by the sunshine.

As rainy days continue,

Tsure's condition will worsen.

Like the sky that is sunny and then cloudy, life is full of tears and laughter.

[August]

It feels as if this is life's summer holidays.

Yeah.

When we were small, there was still homework to do even though it was summer break.

I...

...couldn't do any homework at all.

I thought so too.

But right now, I'm even worse than a child.

I can't even take the train or use cell phones.

You will be able to do those things in no time.

The homework for holidays is to take a rest.

Right, Igu?

[Half a year later]

Winter camellias bloomed. I'm glad that something stays unbroken.

The person who wanted to go to ourwedding reunion aftertwo years was Tsure.

Are you okay, Tsure?

Let's not go?

Just a little break and I'll be fine.

You don't have to force yourself.

I want to move forward, even just a little.

This is the end of our story.

Next, we have Takasaki Mikio-san and Haruko-san to share their story.

It's been two years since I last saw everyone.

The reason we couldn't attend this last year...

...was that I got depression.

I wasn't able to do anything.

However, though it was one difficult yearfor me,

my wife...

Um...

I'm sure my wife...

...must have...

...gone through a lot too.

But she still smiles always...

...and...

...gives me support.

Don't force yourself.

Just as my husband has said,

this one year...

...was a tough yearfor us.

But it was also the yearwe went through a lot together.

Just now when we read out loud the marriage vow,

I was overwhelmed with emotion.

"Even..."

"...in sickness..."

"...and in health,"

"...in good times..."

"...and in bad..."

"I will love this man,"

"...cherish him,"

"...comfort him,"

"...and assist him."

Just as what this vow says,

I feel that we became true husband and wife.

I'm glad I can be here by your side, Tsure.

I'm really glad you're here...

...by my side.

Thank you.

You know,

I'm thinking about writing a book.

What is it about?

Depression.

Because you see, people don't really know about it though anyone can get this illness.

Are you gonna write about me?

Not just you.

I'll write about us.

Haru-san.

Hmm?

My diary.

It might help with the book you're writing.

I'm gonna take a walk.

Tuesday, March 15.

I felt extremely dull today.

Days like this, I just can't do anything.

"No, instead of thinking that you can't do it, just think that you won't do it."

Haru-san told me that.

Tuesday, ApriI 12.

I was plucking weeds in the garden, and when I realized it, it already took me 2 hours.

Got rid of all the weeds. It was perfect.

Praised by Haru-san.

I'm happy, but my hips hurt.

Wednesday, May 18.

Haru-san. Sorry for making you worry.

The important thing that is always close to me and never changes...

...but sometimes I lose sight of it and wonderwhere it went.

Though if I look carefully, it's just right there where I can reach.

When it's gone, I'll be out of my mind.

I have you. I have you right by my side.

I realized that today.

Haru-san.

Thank you so much.

I hope a day will come when I can talk about what happened today and laugh.

Friday, May 20.

0kaa-san sent us vegetables. I'm grateful to herfor always worrying about us.

I want to thank her, but I'm scared of talking through the phone.

Haru-san, please thank herfor me.

Yes, this is Kurita barbershop...

This is Mikio.

0h Mikio-san? What's wrong?

No...

I wanted to thank you...

...for always worrying about us.

What are you being so formal for? We are family, so it's just natural that I worry about you.

Yes.

Thank you so much.

I see now.

I just have to draw these, right?

Haru-san.

Haru-san!

Haru-san! Haru-san! Haru-san! Haru-san!

He said I don't have to take medicine anymore.

- That means you're cured? - I'm not.

Alot of people with depression relapse so not taking medicine doesn't mean you can neglect it.

But that's still some progress. Aren't you glad?

Tada! It's done.

Tsure said since he can't go out to work, he will be working at home.

He founded a company to manage my works.

- Haru-san. - Hm?

Alot of people sent us emaiI expressing theirthoughts.

Really?

Isn't that just 0tou-san and 0kaa-san again?

But they can't use computer right?

Let's see. "I read it many times. I also had both my parents and my parents-in-law read it."

"I want more people to understand this illness."

0h?

There's this emaiI too.

"Requesting Tsure to give a speech."

Maybe I'll do it.

Very nice to meet you all.

I'm Tsure.

My name is Takasaki Mikio. Thank you all for coming today.

Depression is a very adverse illness.

The secret to overcoming the illness lies in the words "ato de"*... (* which means "Leave for later")

And so we thought of the motto "a-to de".

The "a" in "a-to de" means "do not rush things."

The "to" in "a-to de" means "no exception."

And then, the "de"*... (* "de" in "a-to de" also means "and then")

...means "separate things you can and cannot do."

Honestly speaking, there was a long period of time...

...when I was really ashamed of the fact that I got this illness.

The person who changed that mindset of mine is my wife, who's sitting overthere.

She kept stressing that there's nothing to be ashamed about.

There are a lot of things that this illness has taught me.

But among them, the one thing that I think about the most is that...

...anyone of us can take pride in the fact that we are living.

People who sufferfrom illnesses and the surrounding people who support them...

all of them can take pride in the mere fact that they are living.

That's what I think.

This book portrays me in my most miserable and embarrassing moments.

However, I'm still taking pride in each of those moments.

This doesn't mean that I've been completely cured.

From now on, I'll learn to live with this illness.

This might as well be the best way for me to come to terms with who I truly am.

Well, that's my perspective on things now.

Thank you all very much for coming today.

Thank you forthe wonderful speech. Is there any question?

Yes.

YES!

I don't have any questions though. Is it okay?

I'm sorry forthe trouble, but there's something I would like to say.

"I'm sorry forthe trouble, but there is something I would like to inquire."

Thanks so much...

...for making this book.

Haru-san, when you wrote the book,

...in my diary, there was something I apologized to you about, right?

You mean that time you tried to commit suicide in the bathroom?

Yeah.

I didn't write this in the diary but at that time, I thought about you.

I imagined you planning for my funeral.

I wonder if she can do it? Maybe not.

You're so mean.

But then you came for me.

The wind feels nice, doesn't it?

Perhaps from now on, Tsure will have to live with this "cold of the whole universe."

But there is no night that won't end.

Even if the sky at dawn is cloudy,

...it's still much brighterthan the night.

Translated by yuizaki_libra@livejournal Timed by bittersweet_bun@ourhour

Raw provided by bittersweet_bun@ourhour

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