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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,319
This programme contains
some strong language
2
00:00:04,320 --> 00:00:06,120
and adult humour from the start.
3
00:00:10,280 --> 00:00:11,599
SHE LAUGHS
4
00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:15,679
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to Mrs Brown's Boys!
5
00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,639
# She's Mrs Brown
6
00:00:18,640 --> 00:00:20,840
# That's Mrs Brown
7
00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:24,440
# Our Mrs Brown. #
8
00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:29,159
No, I can't make it out.
9
00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,599
Everything looks like
just a dead Chihuahua to me.
10
00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:35,639
Wait till I get some light.
You won't need a light.
11
00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:37,999
Sure the sun shines
out of my arse. Ha!
12
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:39,719
Don't believe your mother.
13
00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:44,519
Oh, hello! And season's greetings.
I'll be with you in a second.
14
00:00:44,520 --> 00:00:47,160
I'm just going deep into the forest
to check something.
15
00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:54,199
Mammy! What the hell are you doing?
Oh, Cathy, good girl.
16
00:00:54,200 --> 00:00:56,639
Dr Flynn is on the phone. Tell him
I'll be with him in a minute.
17
00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,520
I'm just checking something for him.
18
00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:02,680
Hello, Dr Flynn?
19
00:01:03,640 --> 00:01:07,639
Yes. Er, she said
she's just checking something.
20
00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:09,199
And I can't make anything out.
21
00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:12,079
Oh! Hot, hot! Hot!
22
00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:16,559
Shut up, ya big cissy. Uh-oh!
23
00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:18,120
HUGE FART
24
00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,759
Grandad, you blew out
the fecking candle.
25
00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:23,160
Sorry.
26
00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:29,960
Dr Flynn wants to know,
what are you checking?
27
00:01:31,440 --> 00:01:33,119
Dr Flynn asked me to check
28
00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:35,039
if Grandad's testicles
had gone black yet.
29
00:01:35,040 --> 00:01:37,519
No, Mammy, he asked you to check
30
00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:40,720
if Grandad's test results
had come back yet.
31
00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:47,439
Well, tell him the postman
hasn't come yet.
32
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,079
I'll get her to call you
later, Dr Flynn.
33
00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:52,239
Cathy, take him into his bedroom.
Come on.
34
00:01:52,240 --> 00:01:54,359
And you might think about shaving...
35
00:01:54,360 --> 00:01:55,400
..Cathy.
36
00:01:58,320 --> 00:02:01,119
Well, I could have done
without that.
37
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:03,680
In fact, I could have done
without this whole year.
38
00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:08,799
Everybody in February
was raving about Covid-19.
39
00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:11,360
Nobody talked about
the 18 Covids before that.
40
00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:19,319
And then people started panicking.
41
00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:22,960
Before you knew it, the shelves
in the shops were empty.
42
00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:29,879
What were people thinking?
43
00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:32,999
The man on the television said,
"We're going to have a pandemic."
44
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,919
And the next thing, people are
going, "Pandemic?! Oh, my God!
45
00:02:35,920 --> 00:02:38,279
"How will I wipe my arse?"
46
00:02:38,280 --> 00:02:39,660
SHE LAUGHS
47
00:02:39,661 --> 00:02:41,039
Madness.
48
00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:42,319
Rory and Dino decided
49
00:02:42,320 --> 00:02:45,999
that they wanted to get their own
brand of hairdryer on the market.
50
00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:48,519
The Wash And Blow Dryer.
51
00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:50,279
Where did they go to get it made?
52
00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:55,199
Wuhan in China! Yeah. They're still
there, and they can't get back.
53
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:59,039
Poor Grandad had to isolate himself
in his bedroom for two weeks.
54
00:02:59,040 --> 00:03:01,559
He lost seven pounds.
55
00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:04,559
All I fed him during the two weeks
was cream crackers and cheese.
56
00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:07,079
It's the only thing
that would fit under the door!
57
00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:08,120
SHE LAUGHS
58
00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:11,839
What's funny?
Nothing, Cathy. Sit down.
59
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:13,720
Do you want a cup of tea?
Yes, please.
60
00:03:20,920 --> 00:03:23,559
Hello, Winnie. Hello, Agnes.
61
00:03:23,560 --> 00:03:25,519
Is the weather bad out there?
62
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:27,520
VOICE MUFFLED
63
00:03:29,160 --> 00:03:32,480
Yeah. No, Winnie, in the script
it says mumble, not fuckin' mime.
64
00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:38,120
Here. Take that off ya.
Go on, take it off ya and sit down.
65
00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:42,919
Mammy, why is Winnie wearing that?
66
00:03:42,920 --> 00:03:45,239
You don't have to cover up now
for your next-door neighbour.
67
00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:46,799
Don't tell her.
68
00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:50,080
I get great fun walking around
the supermarket with Buzz Aldrin.
69
00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:56,319
Sit down, Winnie. Thanks, love.
Do you want tea?
70
00:03:56,320 --> 00:03:58,880
Oh, yes, please.
Ah, for fuck's sake.
71
00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:03,479
You look tired, pet. Why wouldn't
I be? I had Jim this morning.
72
00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:06,399
Mm. And how is Jim?
73
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:08,719
The happiest milkman in Finglas.
74
00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:12,839
Ah, lovely. Here, any news
from Rory and Dino?
75
00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:15,799
Oh, just the usual weekly FeckFace.
76
00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:18,599
"FaceTime." Whatever!
77
00:04:18,600 --> 00:04:20,599
Well, I hope they don't
get the virus.
78
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:23,440
Get it? Winnie, they probably
buckin' started it.
79
00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:28,959
Do you think so?
80
00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:30,000
No!
81
00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:35,599
Any news your end? Oh, yeah,
Sharon went to see a dietician.
82
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:39,319
Oh, good for her.
So, what did the dietician say?
83
00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:44,279
Well... she said he said
she could eat anytn...
84
00:04:44,280 --> 00:04:47,919
..anything other than... tomatoes.
85
00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:49,999
Do you want to try that again?
86
00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:51,399
She said he said...
87
00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:53,799
No, wait. Now.
88
00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:58,599
She said he said she could eat
anything... except tomatoes.
89
00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:02,799
You're doing it. You're getting...
You're getting so fuckin' close.
90
00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:04,000
Come on, come on!
91
00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:09,559
She said... Yes?
..he said... Yes.
92
00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:11,439
..she could eat anything...
93
00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:14,039
Yes?
..except tomatoes.
94
00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:16,199
AUDIENCE CHEERS AND APPLAUDS
95
00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:17,799
But Sharon doesn't like tomatoes.
96
00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,720
I know. Wasn't that lucky?
97
00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:24,399
I'm going over to see her.
See you later.
98
00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:26,919
Cheers, pet. See ya, chicken.
99
00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:29,599
You know, I really missed you
during the lockdown, Winnie.
100
00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:32,239
I missed you, too, Agnes. Hm.
101
00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:33,920
AUDIENCE: Aw!
102
00:05:34,880 --> 00:05:37,319
Could I borrow a couple
of toilet rolls off ya, love?
103
00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:41,439
Winnie, I swear to God,
if I had some I'd give them to ya.
104
00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:44,319
What did you do to amuse yourself
during the lockdown?
105
00:05:44,320 --> 00:05:46,599
Well, I did a jigsaw...
106
00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:49,399
Yeah? ..I did some knitting...
Mm-hm.
107
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:51,519
..and I ran out of stuff
to watch on the telly.
108
00:05:51,520 --> 00:05:53,360
I know, I know!
109
00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:56,640
So many feckin' repeats.
110
00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:03,759
# Stuff the turkey's arse with holly
111
00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:06,320
# Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la la-la! #
112
00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:08,520
Yeah, there.
113
00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:17,200
TREE COUGHS
114
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:20,959
God bless ya.
115
00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:22,280
That wasn't me, Winnie.
116
00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:28,239
Hiya, Mrs McGoogan.
117
00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:31,479
Ah, hello, boys. Just us, Ma.
118
00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:33,519
And me, Buster, Mrs Brown.
119
00:06:33,520 --> 00:06:37,119
Buster, I already said, "Us". Who
did you think I was talking about?
120
00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:38,959
I thought you were talking
about you, Dermo.
121
00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:41,279
If it was just me,
why would I say, "Us"?
122
00:06:41,280 --> 00:06:44,159
Well, you have put on
a bit of weight, Dermo.
123
00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:46,799
What? Just kidding.
124
00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:50,160
Hello, son. Ah!
Oh, no, no, no. No.
125
00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:54,160
Come on.
126
00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:57,399
Busy day? Busy enough.
127
00:06:57,400 --> 00:06:59,279
Just making people aware, you know.
128
00:06:59,280 --> 00:07:03,079
Yeah, he's a syringe,
I'm the vaccine. No, son,
129
00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:06,200
he's a syringe
and you're the buckin' disease!
130
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:11,599
Buster...
131
00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:15,079
Buster! I'm only joking.
132
00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:18,480
Now, get that sad face off ya
or Santa Claus won't come.
133
00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:22,759
What are you hoping to get
this Christmas, Buster?
134
00:07:22,760 --> 00:07:24,440
An STD.
135
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,439
A HDTV, Buster!
136
00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:31,319
Oh, thank God.
137
00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:34,719
That's why the Santa
in the shopping centre barred me!
138
00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,200
No way!
139
00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:40,639
So, Buster, what did you do to amuse
yourself during the lockdown?
140
00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:43,159
I read a book. By Shakespeare.
141
00:07:43,160 --> 00:07:44,679
Oh! Which one?
142
00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:45,799
Er...
143
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:47,080
..William, I think.
144
00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:53,599
Right, we'd better head back.
145
00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:56,479
Oh, Mrs Brown, watch out
for Knicky Knacky Dicky.
146
00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:59,959
Oh, I heard about this.
What's Knicky Knacky Dicky?
147
00:07:59,960 --> 00:08:01,639
Not "what", "who". Yeah.
148
00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:04,319
There's a fella going round the
estate knocking on women's doors,
149
00:08:04,320 --> 00:08:06,919
but before they open the door
he's sticking his willy
150
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,080
through the letterbox. No way!
151
00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:13,239
Oh, my God!
152
00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:15,680
Did they get a description?
Er...
153
00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:20,119
Of the man!
154
00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:24,239
Nope, nobody's seen him.
Not his face, anyway.
155
00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:26,119
See yas.
156
00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:28,559
Sharon thinks she recognised him.
157
00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:29,999
She saw his face?
158
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,040
No.
159
00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:36,240
Anyway, I'd better go,
have a shower. Right...
160
00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:40,519
Agnes? What, Winnie? Could I
scrounge some biscuits off ya?
161
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:43,879
Don't go near the cupboard, Winnie!
162
00:08:43,880 --> 00:08:46,159
Winnie, that's all the biscuits
I have to do me now.
163
00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:49,199
I don't have any spare.
OK, love.
164
00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:50,360
Oh!
165
00:08:51,320 --> 00:08:53,879
Buster's serious about
that Knicky Knacky Dicky.
166
00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:56,080
You watch out for him, Agnes.
I will.
167
00:08:59,680 --> 00:09:01,080
Oh, I will!
168
00:09:06,760 --> 00:09:10,599
Mm.
# Silent night
169
00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:13,279
# Holy night... #
170
00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:14,840
LETTERBOX RATTLES
171
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:18,880
TREE COUGHS
172
00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:22,400
Shh. God bless you.
173
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:27,160
LETTERBOX RATTLES
174
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:36,759
Go on, put your willy
in the letterbox, I dare ya.
175
00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:38,160
I'll bite it off.
176
00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:43,279
Hello, Father.
Are you OK, Mrs Brown?
177
00:09:43,280 --> 00:09:46,159
Yes. No, I thought you were...
that you... stick the...
178
00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:48,639
..in the... in the...
179
00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:49,920
Come in, Father, come in.
180
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:56,999
Ha! A mask.
Very good. Very inventive.
181
00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,200
Well...
182
00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:02,439
I bet these light up
or something, do they?
183
00:10:02,440 --> 00:10:05,639
No, Father, no. Christmas trees
are like priests. You know,
184
00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:07,400
the balls are just for decoration.
185
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,759
Tea, Father? I will, please.
186
00:10:11,760 --> 00:10:13,280
TREE COUGHS
187
00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:16,759
God bless.
188
00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:20,239
Well, Father, if you're looking
for Trevor, you're out of luck.
189
00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:22,239
He's not in this episode.
190
00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:25,519
No, I just popped in
to see how you and Grandad are.
191
00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:29,039
Oh, we're getting by. How did you
manage during the lockdown?
192
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:33,119
Grand, we got through it.
Mrs Brown, could you help me out?
193
00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:35,799
Certainly, Father,
just go through that door,
194
00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:38,880
through the garden gate and then
straight on to the main road.
195
00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:46,559
What's that, Father?
Oh! It's the post.
196
00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:49,319
I met the postman outside
and I offered to bring them in.
197
00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:53,439
Thank you very much. You said you
want me to help you with something?
198
00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:55,839
Just advice. Well, if I can.
199
00:10:55,840 --> 00:10:58,999
You have a way of
commanding attention, Mrs Brown.
200
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:00,399
Oh, Father, now...
201
00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:03,279
Well, yeah.
202
00:11:03,280 --> 00:11:06,359
I'm having trouble communicating
with the parishioners.
203
00:11:06,360 --> 00:11:07,799
Ah, parishioners, yeah, yeah.
204
00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:10,959
When I'm trying to deliver
the word of the Lord... Yeah.
205
00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:13,519
..I don't feel I'm getting
the message across
206
00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:16,479
and they don't listen to me.
Look at that, Father.
207
00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:21,239
Left the price on the back of
the card. How thoughtless is that?
208
00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:22,839
I'm sorry, what were you mumbling?
209
00:11:22,840 --> 00:11:25,119
That I can't really
get across the word.
210
00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:28,479
Crosswords? I love crosswords.
I'm very good at them, too.
211
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:32,679
Hiya, Mammy. Hello, Cathy.
Hello, Father. Hiya.
212
00:11:32,680 --> 00:11:35,199
Oh, Father Damien's having trouble
with his crossword.
213
00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:37,559
Really? What's the clue? No, no, no.
214
00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:40,839
I'm having trouble delivering
the word of the Lord.
215
00:11:40,840 --> 00:11:43,439
How many letters? About 12.
216
00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:45,919
"Delivering the word," 12 letters.
217
00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:48,399
No, no, communication.
218
00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:49,559
No. Too many letters.
219
00:11:49,560 --> 00:11:52,359
Oh, most of them are for me,
so you needn't worry.
220
00:11:52,360 --> 00:11:54,879
The clue! Let me think, Father.
221
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:57,679
Hello, Mrs Brown. Hello, Buster!
222
00:11:57,680 --> 00:11:59,720
Hiya. Hello, Cathy!
223
00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:04,079
Hello, Buster. All right, Father?
There you go, Mrs Brown.
224
00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:06,079
Thank you, son.
225
00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:08,479
Buster, here's a crossword clue
for you.
226
00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:10,719
Ah, Mammy, don't embarrass him.
227
00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:12,920
Don't be so fecking
condescending, Cathy.
228
00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:19,160
Buster, "Delivering the word
of the Lord," 12 letters.
229
00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:23,479
Ah, it's easy.
230
00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:27,599
G-A-L-L-A-B-O-U-T-E-V-E.
231
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:31,559
Gallabouteve.
It means "biblical epic".
232
00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:34,160
- See ya later.
- AUDIENCE CHEERS AND APPLAUDS
233
00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:38,399
Ah, one for me, one for me,
234
00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:41,559
one for you, one for me, one for me,
235
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:44,879
another one for you, one for me...
No, hold on. Go back.
236
00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:47,239
That's not for you.
That one's for me.
237
00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:48,839
I beg your pardon, Cathy.
238
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:52,359
I think you'll find, if it says
"Mrs Brown", that's for me.
239
00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:53,719
I am Mrs Brown.
240
00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:57,479
Oh, you are Mrs Brown.
But that says M-S.
241
00:12:57,480 --> 00:13:00,279
Ms Brown. I am Ms Brown.
242
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:07,120
I think you'll find that unless it
says M-S Cathy Brown, pacifically...
243
00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:10,239
..cos you're a spinster...
244
00:13:10,240 --> 00:13:13,039
..then it's for me.
I think Cathy might be right.
245
00:13:13,040 --> 00:13:16,199
Oh, I think you're in company here,
Father, not conversation.
246
00:13:16,200 --> 00:13:17,519
Oh, right.
247
00:13:17,520 --> 00:13:21,080
Well, I think you'll find it's in
my possession now and that's that.
248
00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:27,239
That girl has no respect. Can I get
back to what I was saying about
249
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:29,599
trying to really get my message
across this Christmas?
250
00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:31,759
Yes, Father.
Look, what you need to do is...
251
00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:35,959
Hiyas. Hello, girls.
Hello, Maria, hello, Barbara.
252
00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:39,519
Oh, wait a minute, back, back.
Get back. Back off.
253
00:13:39,520 --> 00:13:41,719
Father, you have to go.
Go? But why?
254
00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:43,920
New production rules.
Only four in a scene.
255
00:13:47,560 --> 00:13:48,799
Out.
256
00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:50,879
Cathy, show him out.
257
00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:53,799
See ya, Father Damien.
Thanks for dropping in.
258
00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:55,559
Enjoyed the chat.
259
00:13:55,560 --> 00:13:56,600
Nice man.
260
00:13:58,320 --> 00:14:00,999
Mrs Brown, it's Christmas,
that rule doesn't apply any more.
261
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,040
- I know, but he doesn't know that.
- SHE LAUGHS
262
00:14:04,041 --> 00:14:06,439
Mrs Brown? Yes? I know you booked
an appointment for me
263
00:14:06,440 --> 00:14:09,199
to style your hair for Christmas.
Yes, Friday, two o'clock.
264
00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:12,239
Well, Barbara's worried,
and to be honest, she's right to.
265
00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:15,359
What are you saying? I'm going to
do your hair here in the house.
266
00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:18,919
The salon is packed and we don't
want to take any chances. Chances?
267
00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:21,759
You know, with you
in the high-risk category.
268
00:14:21,760 --> 00:14:25,359
Me? High risk? Primio risko?
Or as they say in Russia...
269
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:26,720
..hhharhhhumtunkh.
270
00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:33,320
You know, people with
pre-existing conditions and...
271
00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:36,320
..the elderly.
272
00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:41,559
I see, Barbara.
273
00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:43,999
And what exactly would my...
274
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:45,800
.."pre-existing condition" be?
275
00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:56,079
Medications. You're on
a lot of medications.
276
00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:58,679
And they say, if you're on them,
that you should take extra care.
277
00:14:58,680 --> 00:15:01,079
Exactly, medications.
278
00:15:01,080 --> 00:15:03,080
SHE MOUTHS
279
00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:06,039
I suppose.
280
00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:07,519
Right, Barbara, let's go.
281
00:15:07,520 --> 00:15:11,160
See ya. See yas. See ya Friday.
282
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:24,800
Mammy, sit down. What's up?
283
00:15:26,080 --> 00:15:28,639
What do you know about
a competition in the Radio Times?
284
00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:30,239
I don't know anything about any...
285
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:33,079
Oh, wait a minute.
There was a competition
286
00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:35,279
that Winnie had in a magazine,
and she said the two of us
287
00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:37,799
should enter, for the craic.
And what was it for?
288
00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:42,039
The BBC have decided that,
after the Queen's Christmas message,
289
00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:44,639
that a member of the public
should deliver a Christmas message,
290
00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:47,359
and whoever wins the competition
gets to do it.
291
00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:49,879
Why do you want to know?
You've only won it.
292
00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:51,559
Fuck off!
293
00:15:51,560 --> 00:15:52,840
You are kidding me!
294
00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:57,120
Oh, Cathy, we only entered for fun.
295
00:15:59,880 --> 00:16:04,119
Winnie! Hiya, Cathy, love!
Hiya, Mrs McGoogan. Hi, what's up?
296
00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:06,799
Winnie, do you remember that
competition you got us to enter?
297
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:09,959
Oh... Oh, the one about the
Queen's message? Yes, yes, yes!
298
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:15,159
Oh, I do. Yes. To be honest, Agnes,
I bought 50 of them magazines
299
00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:18,000
and I entered it 50 times. Yeah.
300
00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:24,079
Really? Yeah.
301
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:26,079
It means that much to you?
302
00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:27,680
Yeah!
303
00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:33,679
I've prayed and prayed
to St Anthony, St Jude,
304
00:16:33,680 --> 00:16:37,039
St Ronaldo... He's not a saint.
..every night,
305
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:42,039
asking, "Oh, please, please,
PLEASE let me win."
306
00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:44,479
It would make my whole year.
307
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:46,480
AUDIENCE: Aw!
308
00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:50,879
Anyway, why are you asking?
309
00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:51,920
I just...
310
00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:55,519
I was just wondering if you'd heard
anything from them.
311
00:16:55,520 --> 00:16:56,639
No, nothing as yet.
312
00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:58,919
They're probably leaving it
till the last minute,
313
00:16:58,920 --> 00:17:02,119
you know, to keep it a secret.
314
00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:04,360
Yeah, secret. Yeah, probably.
315
00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:08,839
Anyway, I just came over to see
if you're coming to Foley's tonight.
316
00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:11,439
I don't know, Winnie.
The restrictions drive me mad.
317
00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:14,079
Ah, Agnes, come on. It'll be fun.
318
00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:17,279
They sell drink, don't they?
Yeah. Yeah, I'll be there.
319
00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:20,239
I'll see ya later, love.
See ya, Winnie, see ya. Bye!
320
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,039
See ya, Winnie!
321
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:24,479
And how are you going to tell her?
322
00:17:24,480 --> 00:17:27,639
I don't know. I'll think about it.
323
00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:29,599
Well, you'd better think fast.
324
00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:32,160
The longer you leave it,
the worse it's going to be.
325
00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:37,120
I didn't even... want to enter
the feckin' thing.
326
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:42,560
POSH VOICE: Well, hello...
327
00:17:43,880 --> 00:17:46,599
..hhhordinary people!
328
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:48,720
NORMAL VOICE: I'd be feckin' good
at this.
329
00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,880
Back away. Back away, Sharon.
Thank you.
330
00:17:57,840 --> 00:18:00,799
Hiya, Winnie.
How are ya, love?
331
00:18:00,800 --> 00:18:03,320
Back off. Keep your distance.
332
00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:10,439
Here you go.
Ah, cheers, pet. That's lovely.
333
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:13,719
Are they still doing
that social-distance thing?
334
00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:17,240
Leave them alone.
It's great craic watching them.
335
00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:21,279
Agnes, do you know what
I was thinking about today? What?
336
00:18:21,280 --> 00:18:24,199
You see them guide dogs?
What about them?
337
00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:26,440
Well, who picks up their shit?
338
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:32,440
Some things change,
some things never change.
339
00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:37,000
Lily Cunningham is 104 tomorrow.
340
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:40,399
We'll see.
341
00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:46,199
Winnie, see this competition?
My one, the Queen's Speech? Yeah.
342
00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:48,999
I told ya, Agnes,
I haven't heard anything yet,
343
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,599
but fingers crossed, eh?
344
00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:53,719
Oh, I don't know
what I'm going to wear.
345
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:57,519
Mother of God, she's not going
to make it easy for me, is she?
346
00:18:57,520 --> 00:18:59,599
Crisps, pet?
In a minute, Winnie.
347
00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:02,239
Winnie, I heard from them.
348
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:03,559
They sent me a letter.
349
00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:04,600
I won it.
350
00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:09,199
When? Today.
351
00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:13,279
But I was in your house twice today,
and you never said anything to me.
352
00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:14,919
I know.
353
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:16,519
Winnie...
354
00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:19,559
Back off, Agnes Brown...
355
00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:22,760
..you... you speech stealer!
356
00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:25,720
BANG!
357
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,080
Some friend!
358
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:34,960
AUDIENCE: Aw!
359
00:19:43,440 --> 00:19:47,399
What do you think, Maria? Super job.
Dino couldn't have done better.
360
00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:48,640
Well done!
361
00:19:48,641 --> 00:19:49,879
DOORBELL RINGS
362
00:19:49,880 --> 00:19:52,600
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Back off the door.
363
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:55,879
If there's a willy
coming through that letterbox,
364
00:19:55,880 --> 00:19:58,240
- it'll be addressed to me.
- SHE LAUGHS
365
00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:01,520
I'm ready.
366
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:07,800
Hello, Father. Well, do come in.
367
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,479
Post. Oh, you've become
a regular Postman Pat, Father.
368
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:16,840
Hi, Father Damien.
369
00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:19,960
Wait a minute.
370
00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:22,759
Barbara?
371
00:20:22,760 --> 00:20:23,960
Out.
372
00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:26,880
THEY MOUTH
373
00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:37,199
Here, hang on, Barbara,
I'll go with ya.
374
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:39,520
Oh, good shot. Two for one.
375
00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:42,599
So, you said you wanted
to see me, Mrs Brown.
376
00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:45,919
Yes, Father. You were saying
that you're having a problem getting
377
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:49,519
across your Christmas message. Yes.
Do you have a solution? I think so.
378
00:20:49,520 --> 00:20:52,759
The Queen thing gave me an idea.
"Queen thing"?
379
00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:55,359
Ach, never mind, Father.
Father, what you need to do
380
00:20:55,360 --> 00:20:58,559
is get a member of the community
to give the sermon on Christmas Day.
381
00:20:58,560 --> 00:21:00,039
Great idea. But who?
382
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:04,679
Well, it has to be somebody who's,
you know, who'd be listened to,
383
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:08,840
who's respected, somebody who's,
you know, pleasing to the eye...
384
00:21:09,800 --> 00:21:12,159
..somebody who the communicants
really like...
385
00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:13,919
..somebody who's modest.
386
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:15,079
Where's my light?
387
00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:16,839
Thank you.
388
00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:20,119
And somebody who'd be...
a good speaker.
389
00:21:20,120 --> 00:21:22,880
True. But... do you know
anyone like that?
390
00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:29,079
Well, Father, I'm not available,
391
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:32,599
and apparently
Boutros Boutros-Ghali has retired.
392
00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:33,880
So there's your person.
393
00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:39,759
You're absolutely right.
I think so. Thank you, Mrs Brown.
394
00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:40,959
SHE LAUGHS
395
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:42,879
Good luck, Father.
396
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:45,999
You're not going to tell me the name
you gave Father Damien, are you?
397
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:47,400
No.
398
00:21:49,160 --> 00:21:51,560
Get in here. Sit down.
399
00:21:53,320 --> 00:21:54,560
Hello, Winnie.
400
00:21:56,160 --> 00:21:57,559
What's going on?
401
00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:59,999
Mammy has something she wants
to say to your mammy, Cathy.
402
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:01,040
Go on, Mammy.
403
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:08,720
I'm sorry, Agnes. I shouldn't have
reacted the way I did.
404
00:22:09,720 --> 00:22:13,039
You deserve it. Oh, Winnie!
405
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:15,039
How humiliating for you.
406
00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:16,920
You must feel so small.
407
00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,879
But you're right, I do deserve it.
408
00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:24,159
Well, you're not getting it.
Cathy, don't stop me now.
409
00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:26,559
I'M not. They are.
410
00:22:26,560 --> 00:22:30,599
"It was always meant that whomever
gives the Christmas Day address
411
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:33,119
"should be resident
within the Commonwealth."
412
00:22:33,120 --> 00:22:35,199
You've been disqualified.
413
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:37,079
That's great!
414
00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:39,720
I mean, no way!
415
00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:43,599
Finglas is not in the Commonwealth?
I'll see ya later, Cathy.
416
00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:45,120
Come on, you. Right.
417
00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:50,199
Oh, Agnes, are you coming to Foley's
tonight for the karaoke?
418
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:54,399
I don't know, Winnie. People tend
to get very emotional when I sing.
419
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:56,239
Ah, come on, Agnes, it'll be fun.
420
00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:59,039
Of course I'll be there.
OK. And, Winnie?
421
00:22:59,040 --> 00:23:00,120
Yes, love?
422
00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:03,540
WINNIE GASPS
423
00:23:03,541 --> 00:23:05,039
AUDIENCE: Aw! Agnes, I...
424
00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:07,800
I... Just take it. I'll do without.
425
00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:12,319
Thanks, love.
See ya at the karaoke. Yeah.
426
00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:14,160
AGNES LAUGHS
427
00:23:17,040 --> 00:23:19,839
You really wanted to give
that speech, didn't ya, Mammy?
428
00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:21,639
Honestly?
429
00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:22,680
Yes.
430
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:26,919
I just thought
it would cheer me up. Yeah.
431
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,600
But I don't know what
it would have done for the Queen!
432
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:35,960
Oh...
433
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:43,480
"Somebody who's never had sex."
434
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:48,839
Something I, something G...
435
00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:50,640
..something something.
436
00:23:52,120 --> 00:23:54,439
Oh, yeah, course.
437
00:23:54,440 --> 00:23:55,600
Ginger.
438
00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:02,360
Hello, son. Hey, Ma.
439
00:24:04,040 --> 00:24:06,239
What's wrong with him?
Don't mind him.
440
00:24:06,240 --> 00:24:08,280
He reminds me of your father
after sex!
441
00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:11,959
So I've been told.
442
00:24:11,960 --> 00:24:14,079
I was usually asleep.
443
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:17,999
TMI. Oh, who's TMI?
Tommy, is it? What's wrong with him?
444
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:21,519
I dunno! He got a call in the car
and he's been like that since.
445
00:24:21,520 --> 00:24:23,999
Buster? Buster!
446
00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:25,279
What's wrong?
447
00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:27,559
I have a gig for Christmas Day.
448
00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:29,719
Really? Doing what?
449
00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:33,120
Father Damien's after asking me
to give the Christmas sermon.
450
00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:35,999
That's a great idea.
451
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:39,359
Good luck with that.
You'll be brilliant.
452
00:24:39,360 --> 00:24:41,880
I better get writing something,
then.
453
00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:46,039
Who's the baby's father again?
Joseph.
454
00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:47,559
No, seriously, come on, who?
455
00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:49,119
BOTH: Joseph!
456
00:24:49,120 --> 00:24:50,280
OK.
457
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:53,679
It was Joseph, wasn't it?
458
00:24:53,680 --> 00:24:55,919
My God, where's he off to?
459
00:24:55,920 --> 00:24:57,240
Bible study, I hope.
460
00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:01,279
So, Dermot, did you tell her?
461
00:25:01,280 --> 00:25:03,759
No. Tell me what?
462
00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:05,719
I believe you entered
a contest to address
463
00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:07,799
the nation in answer
to the Queen's address.
464
00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:09,519
I was disqualified.
465
00:25:09,520 --> 00:25:13,639
Apparently, Finglas is not in the
Credit Union, so I'm not doing it.
466
00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:16,199
Oh, yes, you are.
I don't think so, Dermot.
467
00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:18,999
Ma, I'm going to set up
a camera here in the house.
468
00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:20,399
You're going to do your address
469
00:25:20,400 --> 00:25:22,639
and we're going to put it
on the internet.
470
00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:25,359
And we are going to give you
a makeover.
471
00:25:25,360 --> 00:25:28,760
Me, a makeover? Why? What's wrong
with me? Where do I start?!
472
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:33,919
No, Mrs Brown, we're going
to do you up like the Queen.
473
00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:35,959
Freddie Mercury?!
474
00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:39,599
No, THE Queen. Oh, THE Queen.
475
00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,319
Right, you lot, let's get down
to the karaoke. You coming, Ma?
476
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:45,079
Yeah, yeah. Yes, I am, but you
go on, I'll follow yas down.
477
00:25:45,080 --> 00:25:46,639
ALL: See ya.
See yas.
478
00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:47,820
THE Queen?
479
00:25:47,821 --> 00:25:49,000
SHE LAUGHS
480
00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:54,640
So, this is Christmas 2020.
481
00:25:56,120 --> 00:25:58,679
I think that we can all agree
that this year has been...
482
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:00,639
What's the word I'm looking for?
483
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:02,439
..shit.
484
00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:04,959
But, you know, every cloud
has a silver lining.
485
00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:08,479
I haven't been able to hug
my grandchildren for ages,
486
00:26:08,480 --> 00:26:10,599
but they FaceTimed me every day,
487
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:14,039
so I actually saw more of them
than I ever did.
488
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:17,479
We discovered new heroes in our
lives - doctors, nurses, porters,
489
00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:22,639
truck drivers, cleaners, delivery
people and supermarket crews,
490
00:26:22,640 --> 00:26:24,360
people I used to take for granted.
491
00:26:25,880 --> 00:26:27,640
I hope I never do again.
492
00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:32,359
And television. Where would
we have been without the TV?
493
00:26:32,360 --> 00:26:36,759
You know, we were all determined
to make this show this year.
494
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:39,559
Nothing would stop us, because
in the middle of all the chaos
495
00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:42,359
and hurly-burly that's come at us,
496
00:26:42,360 --> 00:26:44,800
this year we need a... a laugh.
497
00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:49,039
I wish we could give
this whole year a makeover,
498
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:52,239
though we all learned a little bit
about ourselves this year.
499
00:26:52,240 --> 00:26:54,720
Some rediscovered
the importance of family.
500
00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:59,999
Me and Winnie realised
we really are best friends.
501
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:02,919
Cathy and Maria remembered why
they went into the health service
502
00:27:02,920 --> 00:27:04,599
in the first place.
503
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:09,079
And Sharon? She was shocked how
expensive batteries are for her...
504
00:27:09,080 --> 00:27:11,519
..personal electronics.
You know, her...
505
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:13,360
SHE BUZZES
506
00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:17,279
It's been tough.
507
00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:18,839
Some days, instead of going forward,
508
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:22,279
it felt like we were swimming
through porridge.
509
00:27:22,280 --> 00:27:24,279
Speaking of porridge,
510
00:27:24,280 --> 00:27:29,279
Ronnie Barker! Now there's a man
that could make me laugh!
511
00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:31,239
Thank God for comedy.
512
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:33,399
Whether it's Jimmy Carr
or Catherine Tate
513
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:36,159
or Michael McIntyre,
Lee Mack's Not Going Out,
514
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:42,279
Two Doors Down or Derry Girls,
comedy will always give us a lift.
515
00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:44,199
You can be sure of it.
516
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:45,679
When times are tough...
517
00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:47,199
MUSIC STARTS
518
00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:48,760
..we'll stand by you.
519
00:27:54,360 --> 00:27:56,719
# Oh...
520
00:27:56,720 --> 00:28:00,199
# Why you look so sad?
521
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:03,559
# The tears are in your eyes
522
00:28:03,560 --> 00:28:08,079
# Come on and come to me now
523
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:10,679
# And don't...
524
00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:14,159
# ..be ashamed to cry
525
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:17,639
# Let me see you through
526
00:28:17,640 --> 00:28:22,079
# Cos I've seen the dark side too
527
00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:25,279
# When the night falls on you
528
00:28:25,280 --> 00:28:28,359
# You don't know what to do
529
00:28:28,360 --> 00:28:31,479
# Nothing you confess
530
00:28:31,480 --> 00:28:34,479
# Could make me love you less
531
00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:36,800
ALL: We'll stand by you
532
00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:41,599
# We'll stand by you
533
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:44,919
# Won't let nobody hurt you
534
00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:47,360
# We'll stand by you
535
00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:51,040
# We'll stand by you
536
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:55,239
# Won't let nobody hurt you
537
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:58,919
# We'll stand by you
538
00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:02,719
# Take me into your darkest hour
539
00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:06,199
# And we'll never desert you
540
00:29:06,200 --> 00:29:08,560
# We'll stand by you
541
00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:12,879
# We'll stand by you
542
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:16,559
# Won't let nobody hurt you
543
00:29:16,560 --> 00:29:18,840
# We'll stand by you
544
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:23,279
# Take me into your darkest hour
545
00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:26,559
# And we'll never desert you
546
00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:31,239
# We'll stand by you. #
547
00:29:31,240 --> 00:29:32,760
AUDIENCE APPLAUDS AND CHEERS
548
00:29:36,360 --> 00:29:41,479
Goodnight, merry Christmas
and a very happy new year.
549
00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:43,639
Let me know
when you're ready to go, Dermot.
550
00:29:43,640 --> 00:29:45,559
It's running. Oh, no. Where?
551
00:29:45,560 --> 00:29:47,959
The camera is running.
It's recording!
552
00:29:47,960 --> 00:29:50,559
Ah, Dermot, for God's sake,
you never told me! I'm not ready.
553
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:51,919
Go!
554
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:53,519
POSH VOICE: How do you do?
555
00:29:53,520 --> 00:29:55,519
Feck you, anyway.
556
00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:57,599
I would firstly like
to thank Her Majesty
557
00:29:57,600 --> 00:29:59,599
for a wonderful Christmas greeting.
558
00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:03,479
It was a wonderful impersonation
of Olivia Colman.
559
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:06,439
I remember some years ago,
Your Majesty, when you had
560
00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:08,319
your "anus horriblis".
561
00:30:08,320 --> 00:30:12,359
Well, this year has been
an anus horriblis for all of us,
562
00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:16,400
but you, Your Majesty, you were
perfectly wonderful through it all.
563
00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:20,559
I am privileged
to address the nation
564
00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:24,159
or, as they are called,
the "people-us horribilis".
565
00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:26,719
But it was actually my best friend,
Winnie McGoogan,
566
00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:27,999
who made it possible.
567
00:30:28,000 --> 00:30:30,519
Say hello, Winnie.
Your Majesty,
568
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:32,599
and the people of the world,
569
00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:33,639
let me...
570
00:30:33,640 --> 00:30:35,399
CRASH!
571
00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:37,040
Thanks, Winnie. Sorry.
572
00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:40,079
So, where was I?
573
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:41,559
Oh, yes.
574
00:30:41,560 --> 00:30:44,360
People of Ireland...
and Great Britain...
575
00:30:45,320 --> 00:30:47,120
..and Isle of Man...
576
00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:50,120
Why is that light flashing?
577
00:30:52,080 --> 00:30:54,360
The battery's going. Hurry it up.
578
00:30:55,520 --> 00:30:58,359
I just want to say well done
to Liverpool FC on winning
579
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:00,399
the Premiership, Dublin on winning
the All-Ireland,
580
00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:02,119
congratulations to Lewis Hamilton,
581
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:04,639
Katie Taylor, Shane Lowry,
Rory McIlroy, St Helens,
582
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:07,159
Arsenal and Peter Wright -
all champions.
583
00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:09,880
And to Andy Murray, well done, son,
on a brave comeback.
584
00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:17,359
And to you, Your Majesty,
I hope in 2021
585
00:31:17,360 --> 00:31:18,399
your anus...
586
00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:20,960
# Our Mrs Brown. #
587
00:31:23,240 --> 00:31:24,800
SHE LAUGHS
73312
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