All language subtitles for The.Broken.Hearts.Gallery.2020.WEBRip.XviD.MP3-XVID

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He spent the carnival trying to
win me one of those giant bears.

Spent all his
money, has really bad aim.

All he ended up with
was this consolation prize.

Then I thought to myself,
maybe he's my consolation prize.

I'm moving to New York
for college and dreams,

and he's playing Halo
and contemplating a penis tattoo.

So I just said it.

"Maybe we should break up."

And I was expecting him to say,
"No, I can't live without you, Lucy."

But instead, he said,
"Maybe you're right."

And that was it.

Now all I have left of our love
is this sad, second-place duck.

And all his worldly possessions.

Lucy, is this his retainer?

He used to take it out when
we'd make out or have a snack.

My favorite memories.

He needs this. He has a shark mouth.

Don't listen to Amanda.

Your collecting is quirky and adorable.
You're basically an anthropologist.

Correct, Nadine.

I live in a cave of souvenirs,
like The Little Mermaid.

Nothing wrong with being
sentimental. -Sentimental?

It was sentimental when we
were 12. This is full mental.

A bike tire?

Okay, this is active trash.

What the hell?

A used condom? -It's not
used. It's in the package.

Gross matches, old...
A Monopoly thimble?

That's different.

That's not his.

I'm sorry, Luce.

Okay. Breakup tradition.

Let's wait outside of the liquor store
for someone to buy us a box of wine.

And then drink it
through Twizzlers. -Yes!

Let's go. -Let's go.

Wait, are these his car keys?

Vroom, vroom, bitch.

Lucy, we're leaving.

Lucy, let's go!

Lucy!

Found it. -What's happening,
Grey Gardens?

Guest list for the Meszaros
opening at the gallery tonight.

If I lost this, Eva
would skin me alive.

Okay, she can't possibly be
that scary. -She's terrifying.

Eva Woolf is the most
influential gallerist in New York.

As your lawyer, I'm saying, calm
down. -Well, you're not a lawyer.

You're in law school.

Whatever. I can still defend
myself when I murder Jeff.

I love you. -Maybe one day,
our paths will cross again.

Look at that little baby model. She
has no idea she's an endangered species.

Are you gonna marry Yulia
and get her a green card?

Destiny has other plans for us.
Maybe we'll meet in another life.

Does she know that? Oh, God.
-That I believe in reincarnation?

Well, I saw that coming. -You
know what else I love about Max?

Oh, please. We're
waiting with bated breath.

Ignore her. She hates
joy and confetti.

Nadine, I've said it five times.
Confetti is trash that falls from the sky.

Max is a fully grown man. I went
to his place in the West Village.

What?

And he cooked me dinner with
ingredients he had in the fridge.

He has a fridge? -What?

And you know what else he
has? Coffee-table books.

So he has a trust fund.

I can't hear his roommates having sex
through the walls because he has none.

You guys are using those noise-canceling
headphones I got you, right?

They don't work. You are so loud.

Sorry. -Just can't believe
he chose little old me.

That literally makes no sense. -Are
you joking? You are a literal goddess.

Are you guys exclusive?
Have you discussed?

There's no need. I'm satisfying him
in all areas. What more could he want?

Don't be stupid.

The first time Jeff
was ever inside me,

I told him I would castrate him if
he ever spoke to another human woman.

Fine. I'll confirm tonight.

After I impress Eva,
enjoy the open-bar spree,

it'll be the greatest
night of my life.

That's what people say in horror
movies before they get herpes and die.

I'm going to work now.

No.

Little souvenir. This was fun.

Pay up. They're still
together. -Oh, yeah.

Snacks for later. Come find it.

She seems so happy.

What...?

Excuse me. Can you...? -Let me in.

What are you doing? Please, don't.

Hi. For Lucy? -Why
are you getting in? No.

Lyft. Adolfo in a silver Prius.

I'm not... -7023
Decatur. Start the ride.

Really? Are you serious?
This is a private car.

You're everyone's private
driver. Clever. -No, no, no.

That's Uber. Also not what I'm saying.
Can you please get out of my car?

I selected "no talking."

Listen, Adolfo, I... -Adolfo?

I would love to hear
your story. -Okay.

It's just that I've had the worst night
of my life, and I just wanna go home.

Where are you going?

7023 Decatur.

Do you have an aux cord?
Or just put on Hot 97.

Anyway, how was your night?
Can't be worse than mine.

Do you see this
grown-man tie, Adolfo?

Well, this belonged to Max, and it's
practically all I have left of our love

because tonight, he shook
up my life to its very core.

It didn't start this
way, Adolfo. Oh, no.

I was happy once. In love
like a big, dumb idiot.

This is my favorite part.

Just before the show
when all the art is hung.

It feels like we're getting the
toy store ready for Christmas.

Cute. But Eva gets back
today and we have a lot to do.

I love her so much,
gives me diarrhea.

She discovered Cindy
Sherman in a Laundromat.

Gave Basquiat his first solo show.
I just wanna grow up to be her.

Thrilled that I pay
you to socialize.

Max, we are meeting with
Marlene Dumas this afternoon.

Word is, she split with Zwirner.

Strategy session, my office.

Close your mouth, person.
It's unbecoming. Up, up, up.

Oh, wait. Excuse me, Mr.
Sexpot Gallery Director?

Hot tip, Marlene Dumas?
Focus on her riskier works.

I read that she prefers the
paintings that embarrass her.

You are my favorite secret weapon.

God, you make me look good.

Wait, he actually said those words?
-He was paying me a compliment.

I'm sure the first rule of compliments is,
don't reference yourself in a compliment.

Don't interrupt. You're derailing my story.
-Oh, sorry. I thought this was my car.

Well, as I was saying, we
were very subtle at work.

No one suspected a thing.
-What's going on with you and Max?

Can I help you, Harvard?

I may not have feelings,

a love life of my own, or
any friends, for that matter,

but I do have eyes.

Okay, you're loitering.

Junior year, I took a gender
study class at Harvard...

There it is.

...about the social
expectations in a woman's life,

and I think you're unconsciously
subjugating yourself to prop him up.

Classic overachiever.
-She seems really smart.

So we had this art opening
at the gallery tonight,

which is why I'm an absolute vision.

Thank you.

Again!

You might pace yourself.
This is a work event.

Calm down, Judge Judy. I
am just trying to have fun.

Do they teach you that at Harvard?
-Yeah. It's a general education course.

Sounds really fun. -Wasn't meant
to be fun, just educational.

Have you seen Max tonight?

Looks like Dr. Amelia
is back from Paris.

What? What are you talking about?

Me? I don't know. I'm not fun.

Sorry I couldn't go to an Ivy. I
couldn't afford to pretend to row crew.

Sue me. Sue me.

Max never uttered a word
about any sexy doctors,

and Harvard's an energy vampire,
so I didn't let her get to me.

Hello... -Eva.

You. -Hello, goddess, you, also.

I'm not one of those bitches
that doesn't empower women.

Well, that is... It's great
to hear. -So you're up.

What?

Max is giving remarks. Get
up there. Introduce him.

To be honest, I've had a few
tequilas. I don't think...

I'm not your sorority
sister. Just go.

So like any booze bag with a fear
of public speaking, I had more.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen
and those who do not subscribe

to traditional gender roles that
are a product of patriarchal society.

Am I right?

Sorry.

I am here to introduce Max
Vora, director of Woolf New York.

Max joined Woolf in 2014.

Where was I?

Told you so.

Fuck this. Okay.

Question for the group.

Speaking of the devil here, when
did dating one person become uncool?

Because I don't understand.

Jane Austen, she didn't
write about polyamory.

No, no, no. It was just
Emma. It wasn't Emmas.

Oh, we are living in very muddy
times. People are lying constantly.

Oh, shit. -I know.

We only have 10 years before we
all drown in the melting ice caps,

but I swear, the most sacred
resource is not the ozone.

Oh, no. It's honesty.

Excuse me. Hey. Lucy... -Where
is that? Oh, no, no, no, sir.

You stay back. I'm
fine. Yep. That...

Are you...?

Lucy?

Lucy, I know. I know.

I know. -Who is she?

It's Amelia. She's my
ex. It's complicated.

Okay, Lucy, listen. You're a blast.

I don't even use that word, but
it fits for you. You are so funny.

But we're in completely
different places in our lives.

I'm 35 years old. I
need to find that thing.

And that thing is not me?

This sucks.

Eva doesn't want you
to come in tomorrow.

Right. That's nice of her.

Personal day would be good.
I'm probably concussed.

Eva doesn't think you
should come back...

ever.

I'm fired?

Honestly, I think you're
better off without him.

Came to New York to
have my own gallery.

I can't even hold down a
job as a gallery assistant.

I'm doomed.

Hello?

Oh, okay.

I'm sorry, Adolfo.

Yeah. No, I'll cancel.

Okay.

You're not Adolfo? Who are you?

My name is Nick.

What? Nick, you just drove
me home? Are you insane?

What was the plan?
You're just gonna...

What? Weaken me with paint fumes and
then just knock me out with lumber?

Leave me for dead? -I did you
a favor. I, too, had a bad day.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God, it's locked.

No. No. -Oh, shit. This is the end!

Can I say something? -Help! Help!

Help, please! Oh, my
God! -It's unlocked.

Okay. Good night. Thanks.

She says, "I don't read
books." -God, Nadine.

Stop dating the pretty, illiterate ones.
-But they make the best accessories.

Yeah, but a shared value system
is the key to everlasting love.

I hate everyone, and
I want them to die.

So does Jeff. That's why we've
been together for six years.

Jeff never speaks. That's
why you've been together.

No, but he comes alive
when we make love.

Max broke up with me.

And I'm fired.

I can't believe it's over.

Is that a crab cake?

It's gonna be okay. -No, it's not.

That...

Oh, yeah. It's gonna be so great.

I can't live like this. We're
getting smell complaints.

Do you know that place
where you feel nothingness?

No.

Here. -My breasts?

No. Underneath your breasts.
It's called your heart.

Oh, my God. -This is where
people keep their hearts.

Try and be sensitive.

Lucy.

You wanna try getting
out of bed today?

I'm busy. -Doing what?

This lady's teaching me
to French braid my hair.

It's impossible. Save
yourselves the anguish.

Have you just been masturbating and
braiding your hair for three weeks?

My vibrator will never break my
heart. -Can we be sex positive?

No one is supposed to
climax that much. Ask Jeff.

Is Jeff in here?

Jeff? Hey! What are you doing?

You can't have a good relationship
because you're mourning the old one.

She's right. You live in the past.

Yeah. It's because the past is
filled with memories and happy times.

How is someone your everything one
minute and then they forget you the next?

Ask Nadine. She's dumps
bitches on the regular.

This is not about me. -Nadine.

Don't do that. -That's it.

Hey! No! Amanda, stop.

Stop it! Come on.

No! -Please, don't. Please.

I need these things.
Okay? Trust my process.

We are coming from a good
place. We're worried about you.

You sit shiva in this room. -Hovel.

Getting rid of things doesn't
mean getting rid of the memories.

Marie Kondo says... -We do
not speak of her in this house.

Okay, these things, they can't
just end up in some landfill.

Do these things spark joy?

Does this spark joy? -Yes.
Clearly. A lot of joy.

Seriously? -Yes.

At least get rid of the ex
memorabilia. Give it back to them.

What? I just call my exes
out of the blue? -Yeah.

The ex memorial goes today. -Fine.

Okay, a few things.

Not this.

Yeah, Luce, I don't... I don't
think that I can accept this.

Don't you have a box under your bed where
you keep mementos from past relationships?

Yeah, I do. And I even have, like,
a thing or two from us, but...

What?

Well, like, your collecting is...

It's creepy.

I couldn't be with someone who just needed
to memorialize every second of every day.

And not to mention your room. I
mean, whenever I would stay over...

it was like hooking
up in a mausoleum.

I'm sure that's on someone's
bucket list. -I don't...

We broke up because of my stuff?

Not no.

I think we can take this,
but most of this is crap.

Crap? What? You have a whole
shelf of crap back there.

Those were my mother's.

Oh, so you get it. Right?

No. Those are collectibles. This
is crap. -This is ridiculous.

Literally, no one understands me,
so I'm just gonna just be on my way.

Okay. Are we done?

No. No, we're not done. Can
I have a job application?

Even after she ghosted me...

I still keep them.

It's contact lenses. It's
pretty gross, actually.

Nick, Marcos.

Bump up. -The usual?

Yeah, make it a
triple. -Shitty day?

Yeah. Eviction notice.

I wouldn't say terrible.
-We have 30 days to open.

Our entire livelihood is in danger.

I don't know how I'm gonna
feed my pregnant wife,

but other than that,
it's pretty good.

Welcome to the hospitality
industry. Basically a slow death.

Are you Asian Gordon Ramsay?
Why would you say that?

Get out. -Fine, I will.

I have to explain to my pregnant wife that
we're not gonna have money in two weeks.

I'm gonna pay you.
-I know you will.

You complete me. -Goodbye.

Bye. -Bye-bye,
little Kimchi Taco.

Goodbye. -Later.

Goodbye. Don't touch me. Where's
the nearest bridge? Anybody?

You'll like it here. Yeah, the
chef is supposed to be good.

It's okay. Just gonna
have a conversation.

Yeah.

Okay.

You got this. Okay.

Thank you.

Excuse me. Can I help you?

Hey, girl. Cute dress.
I'm just meeting a friend.

What friend? -Those ones.
Over there. That's my friend.

Oh, shit. -That guy
just saw you and ducked.

No, no, no. He just
dropped his menu.

I just gotta talk to him for five minutes.
-I'm sorry. I can't let you do that.

Oh, hey, I know that guy.
Adolfo-Nick. What's up, dude?

Hey. -Yo. You know her?

It's a long story. -Ma'am,
I have to ask you to leave.

"Ma'am"? We're the
same age. You can relax.

You're carrying a
garbage bag. -Yeah.

And you tell people where to sit for
a living. And your dress is undone.

Unhandle me! What the...?

I care for you so
much. -Let go of me!

Okay. You can let me go. -That's
the craziest thing I've ever seen.

I had it under control
until you interfered.

You magically show up
everywhere. Are you my stalker?

I think the words you're
looking for are "thank you."

And then I say, "You're welcome."

I'm Lucy.

Charmed, I'm sure.

You good, Lucy?

Yeah, yeah. No, I'm okay. -Okay.

I'm just processing it. Wait. Wait.

Hey, hello. What?

You just manhandled me, and you're
gonna just leave me alone on the street?

Hey! Hey! You hit
her? You just hit her?

No, no, no. -No.

I see what's going
on. You just hit her.

No. -Okay. That's cool, man!

You hit a lady. That's
nice. -No, no, no.

I didn't hit her.
-This is my fault.

This is not your fault.

Being a woman is like living in a goddamn
nobody-believes-me movie every day, okay?

But today is not that day
because we are gonna fight him.

Come at me, homey. -I really...

Come at me! -Oh, no.

Oh, my God. Fuck! -You come at me!

This is all your fault.

I'm so sorry. We should
get some ice on that.

Here's an idea: Why
don't you leave me alone?

No. Only a terrible person would
leave you alone in your time of need.

Yeah. And I think you
are that terrible person.

No. I'm nice.

If you got to know me,
you'd be obsessed with me.

Oh, great. Okay, the car was just pre-game.
This is where you actually murder me.

And yet you are still following
me. -What? You're a squatter?

I guess so. -Construction worker?

Sometimes. -Are we
playing 20 questions?

If you must know... -I must.

It's an old YMCA, and I'm
turning it into a boutique hotel.

What? You're serious? -Yes.

Welcome to the Chloe Hotel.

I'm building a place that feels
like the spots I fell in love with

when I first moved to New York.

Those little places
that only exist here.

But I've spent five years,

and, as you can see, every cent that
I have, and it's all falling to shit.

So, what are you gonna do?

Looks like it's coming together.
Is this gonna be the lobby?

Nothing gets by you.

What's gonna happen up there?

That's phase two. I can't
afford to touch it right now.

Still hurts? -Yeah. Just a bit.

Wait. You're doing it wrong. Give
it to me. -How am I doing it wrong?

Can't have ice touching the
skin. You need a middleman.

Okay. Do you want whiskey?

Yes, please.

She really got you good, huh?

Yeah. She sure did.

Here. This will cure what ails you.

Wow, whiskey really is Mother
Nature's painkiller, huh?

What have you got in here, Lucy?

Oh, my God.

An espresso machine?

Don't go too deep. -And a sock.

Cat in the Hat. -Okay.

Yep. -Oh, my God. Are
those toenail clippings?

You've seen quite
enough, mister. Yeah.

I'm gonna... -Oh, my God.

Thanks for coming. -I get
it. You're a pessimist.

That is the worst thing
anyone has ever said to me.

You collect these things in anticipation
that your relationships are going to end.

No. -It's crazy.

No, no, no. You're wrong.
They're a celebration of memories.

You're a hoarder.
-I'm not a hoarder.

Hoarder. Hoarder. -Take it
back. I'm not a hoarder. Stop!

You want evidence that your
relationships existed in the first place.

Are you afraid that you won't
remember the guys you dated?

I don't need to
explain myself to you.

How about you? You've never collected
anything from a past relationship?

No. I'm a minimalist.

I can fit everything I
own inside a backpack.

When the zombie
apocalypse comes, I'm out.

Nice. You're one of those.

Yeah. One of...

One of what? -You know.

"I'm a lone wolf. I
don't need anybody."

But really you are just
scared of showing your insides.

Yeah. Everyone either
leaves, disappoints or dies.

Okay, Mr. Rogers. Can't wait for the
new show: Uplift the Nation.

So funny. What are you
gonna do with this stuff?

That's a good question.

When love crumbles, how
do you preserve its ruins?

Why don't you leave
it here? -What? No.

Come on. -No, I can't do that.

Just let go. -No,
no, no. It's okay.

Sure. It'll be okay. -Okay.

This...

Oh, look. It's a
nail. Perfectly placed.

Would you look at that?

Kind of looks cool.

It's like art in a gallery.

The Sad Gallery.

More like the Broken Heart Gallery.

Do you have a marker?

What? -You have a marker, I just...

No, I don't. -Come on. Please.

I have a brilliant idea.
-Why do you want it?

I'm feeling inspired.
Let me express.

Think fast.

Nice.

Oh, sure. Draw on the wall.

Thank you for letting
me express myself.

You're welcome.

Wait. What's the security
like in this place?

Is there security?

You're worried that someone is
gonna break into my unfinished hotel

and steal your ex-boyfriend's tie?

No. That won't happen, right?

No, it wouldn't happen. -No.

No, you're right. I should leave it.

Yeah, I can leave this.

It'll be good. I'm...
I'm gonna leave it.

No. I can't, actual... No.

What? You're looking
at me. -I'm not. What?

I'm sorry. This just
got weird. -It's okay.

No, I'm... I'm gonna
go. But I will... Bye.

Bye. -He was my high
school sweetheart.

He moved across the
country, and we lost touch.

But smoked too much weed, wouldn't call
you back. He would be a terrible husband.

I make my husband
wear it when we ****.

Lucy? Babe?

Are you okay?

Maybe you could try to get a job?

My birthday week is coming up,

and I expect a really
thoughtful and expensive gift.

There's no birthday week. -Yes.
It's the week of your birthday.

You're not a 16th-century monarch.

You can't command multiple days
for your personal festivities.

Remember our Monopoly tournaments?

Well, I need a Get
Out Of Jail Free card.

Anyway, last night, it was rough.

I wish I could talk to you about it.

Bye.

Lucy.

Nick?

Can I come in?

No. No, no, no. Lucy is dead.

How'd she die?

Decapitated on a roller
coaster. -That's a shame.

She had such a nice head.

And you are not wearing any pants.

Pants. No. Not wearing those.

Shoelaces in a bag?

Go ahead. Judge me.

No judgments.

Wait. What are you doing here? -I
wanna show you something. Come on.

How did you get in here?
-Your roommates let me in.

Those bitches.

Okay. So this map was just here
when you showed up this morning?

Yep. -Who could have left it?

I know a construction
worker, a delivery guy,

one of your multiple personalities?

This is amazing.

There are broken people out there like
me, people who need to let go and move on.

Good. Well, you can take
the stuff and move on.

There's nowhere else like this. I
wish someone had done this for me.

The Broken Heart Gallery
could be a community service.

No. This is my hotel.

It is not some sort of Lost
and Found for hoarder stalkers.

Again, not a hoarder. -Hoarder.

No. We've been through this.

Oh, wow, this is the shrine
to exes you were talking about?

I didn't say... I...

It's a direct quote.
-I didn't say that.

Lucy, this is my friend Marcos.

Hey. Oh, my God. We're friends now?

That would explain why I'm
building a bar top for you for free.

Can you not...? Don't listen
to him. -Friendship. Servitude.

I am the godfather
to his unborn child.

No, he's lobbying for
the position of godfather.

Plot twist: It's not going well.
If I had to guess, you know?

Would you want this man
to be your spiritual guide?

No. Maybe my TV guide.

Am I right? -Terrible dad joke.

I like her. Let's get to work.

Okay. -Nice to meet you.

Wait. Wait, wait, wait.

I can help. I...

I can help with the hotel in
exchange for gallery space.

No. -No, I can help.

I can... I can paint. I can saw.
I can lift and lay tile, grout.

Is that...? That's a thing. -Yeah.

It's not gonna happen.

That sounds like free labor, and,
Nick, you love free labor, don't you?

You do. Come on.

Come on. -You don't have
a plan for the balcony yet.

I did say I had a plan for the
balcony. I said it was phase two.

Sorry, balconies
are really important.

He gets it. -They're essential.

What is going on?
-Two people agreeing.

Maybe eternal friendship. I don't
know. -We're bonding. We're friends?

We should take it
step by step, but sure.

Okay. -It's a good start.

I hate both of you. -Is that a yes?

No. No. -Hell, yes.

Of course. We could use the help.
You start tomorrow, 7 in the morning.

Get us the coffee, right?
You know, gotta pay the piper.

We do love oat milk. You can get
almond milk if you don't have it.

Soy milk, whatever. Have fun with
it. But nothing with actual dairy.

He gets really
sensitive in his tummy.

Okay. All right. Let's... -He
has IBS, it's embarrassing.

IBS is a real thing. -Stop it.

Tell me more about his tummy. -This
is not happening. There is no tummy.

Goodbye.

Dude. What? No. -We have
30 days. We need help.

This is Morris.

My husband and I got him together.

My husband left.

Morris took it pretty hard.

Yeah, he died immediately.

Let me get this straight. You are collecting
other people's junk in addition to your own?

Oh, shut up, Jeff. I
should text Max about this.

He likes to be up to
date with galleries. -No.

Don't do that. -You're
right. I'll slide in the DMs.

That's more chill.
-You need to get a grip.

He is dating a doctor
with the face of an angel.

You're a monster.

Thank you. Okay, you need
some sexual Listerine.

Jeff agrees.

What about that new guy, Nick?

Last time I slept with someone I
worked with, it ended very badly.

Oh, my God. That is so true, Jeff.
That does sound like progress.

Thank you.

Why don't you invite your
"friend" Nick to my birthday?

I came up with a new
theme, murder karaoke.

It combines my favorite
things, murder and karaoke.

A heavenly combo. -A
perfect combination.

You guys.

I am in love.

Her name is Irina, and she's got
tiny baby bones like a baby chick,

and I just wanna build a nest for her
and chew her food for her and feed her.

Jesus, I give it two weeks.

Do I detect cynicism from
the great believer of love?

She's right. You've banged more
Russian models than a tech billionaire.

If you were a guy, we
would hate you. -Yeah.

I don't need this. -Yes, you do.

No, I don't. No, I don't. Okay.
-Yes, you do. Eat the pasta.

Hey, Nick, I...

I can't work anymore
this week, dude. -Why?

Your homeboy's been commissioned to build
a new table for that hotel in Fort Green.

Really? That place is so cheesy.

Oh, my God. How dare I take their money
when you don't like their mason jars.

Look, man, I know...

I know things are tough, but I have
a meeting at the bank on Friday,

and I will get you your money.

You are first on my
list. -Oh, there's a list?

Can I see the list, or...?

It's a theoretical list.
Nick... -It's gonna happen.

Come on. -I can't
keep doing this, man.

I got a family. All right? I
have responsibilities. I'm sorry.

Don't shut off on me. I...

Show me those blushy cheeks.

Oh, my God. I just feel so warm
inside when I see them. Show me...

I'm fine, man.
Please, just go, okay?

All right.

Good morning, building
buds! Who's ready to work?

Because I am. Check me out.

Look at this belt, a
practical belt for tools.

Here is your coffee, Marky
Mark. -All right, Lucy Liu.

And then, for you, I got the
special milks. -Thank you.

Dude. -Sorry.

Her Majesty looks a little upset
this morning, so tread lightly.

Oh, no. We need to talk about our
feelings? Because the CFO has arrived.

Chief Feelings Officer is here.

Let's hold hands. Okay, bring it in,
guys. -God. Dad jokes. Okay, I'm out.

See you, dude. -Bye.

Who is that? -Yeah,
you're in the right place.

Hi. -Hey.

Are you here for the Broken Heart Gallery?
-Yeah. Is this that heartbreak thing?

Yeah. You're in the right place.
Welcome. I'm Lucy, head curator.

Yeah. Willhelmina.

So how's this whole thing work?

I don't know. How does
this whole thing work?

Well, why don't you we start by you
telling me what you brought and why?

Yeah. Well, met my ex,
Gina, while I was actually...

Oh, wait. Pause.

Do you mind if I record this?

Just, you know, for our
socials. -Yeah. Sure.

Take a step back against this.

Right. Here? -Ooh, that is perfect.

And go.

I was in the hospital.

I was recovering from a pretty
nasty skydiving accident.

She was my nurse and had a
body cast covered all my tats,

so Gina, she drew
these ones on for me.

When I could walk, I
asked her to marry me.

But then she changed her
mind three weeks later.

No. -Damn, Gina.

Anyway, time passed,

but this just sat in the corner
of my bedroom, taunting me.

How long have you held on to it
for? -Six... Five years. Five years.

Feels good to admit that, you know?
Then I heard about this place, so...

And how exactly did you
hear about this place?

My masseuse's Instagram. -And how
did your masseuse hear about it?

Don't listen to him. Are
you ready to hand it over?

Yeah. Yeah, I'm ready. -Okay.

It has an odor.

Okay.

You did it. -I did it.

How does it feel?

This is the first time in, like, five
years that I feel a little lighter.

Really? -Yeah.

That's amazing. Thank you.

If you ever wanna see this
again, you can visit any time.

It'll be in my care,
right here. -Okay.

Or, perhaps, at another location.

No, definitely at this
location. Don't worry about him.

Who is he? -Just one last thing.

We just ask for a small donation.

Just to keep the gallery
going. -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There you go. It's only
5 bucks. It's all I have.

Perfect. -All right.

Thank you so much.

We're in business, baby.

And Bonus Jonas,
I'm making you clams.

I'm going to take this.

Thing about breakups is,

someone can ruin your life
just by disappearing, you know?

And then you hang on to the hope
that they'll barrel through your door

full of believable explanations as
to why they didn't actually ghost you,

or lose your number,
or just stop loving you.

So what my ex left was a
jar of organic Choconut.

So, heartbroken, I would
spoon it little by little

while listening to Michael Bolton's
"When I'm Back On My Feet Again."

It's rancid now.

Kind of like my ex-girlfriend's
soul. I hate you. Just kidding.

I hope you die.

How do you get over someone?

You just press some button on
your body and morph into a cyborg?

Just keep going. Don't look
back, don't dwell on anything.

Okay, so you just
bottle everything up

until you implode in a fiery
act of self-destruction?

No. I manage my expectations.

Marcos took another job.

Our interior designer quit
last week, but I'm fine.

I'm not upset. Why?

Because I saw it coming a mile
away and I managed my expectations.

Okay, so you don't ask anything of anyone,
which is why you're not asking me right now.

Asking you what? -I'll
be your interior designer.

Come on! -Good God.

Designer is just a fancy word for
curator. Or it's the other way around.

I don't know, but regardless,
there's cool stuff all around us.

You just need someone
to help you look for it.

Okay, but cool stuff means
expensive, and I'm pretty much broke.

The key to collecting is seeing
value where others usually don't.

You know, one lady's trash
is another lady's treasure.

Kind of like relationships.

And where might one
find these treasures?

Well, it is moving day.

First day of the month,
leases start and end,

so New Yorkers are leaving
pure gold out on these streets.

She's cute, she's charming,
she's calling my name.

She looks like rats live inside
of her. -Then she's habitable.

Lucy, it's 40 blocks to the
Chloe. We are... We're not walking.

Welcome to the
nonviolent firearms show.

Oh, my God.

How do I seem to find
myself in this predicament?

I'm tired. Can we take a break?

Absolutely not. This was your idea.

Fine, but can you distract
me? Tell me your life story.

My life story? -Yeah.

But my life hasn't
even happened yet.

Don't you ever think about what
you're gonna tell your biographer?

Is that something you think about?
-All the time. It'll begin as such:

"It all started on a
sticky August afternoon."

Oh, my God. Lucy, stop. Stop it.

Okay. Your life story. Go.

Really? -Yes.

My parents really never
settled down. We moved a ton.

That must have been hard.

Think it make...
Made me independent.

So where would you go on holidays?

Grandma's house.

Tell me more about G-Ma.

Well, she lived in this little place
called Kenosha, which is in Wisconsin.

She looked like a Keebler elf.

My grandma loved two
things, football and boxing.

She chewed tobacco
till she was 90. -Nice.

And I always thought she
was this sweet old grandma,

but it turns out she was
a bookie her entire life.

Okay, Grandma. -I
know. What a badass!

After she died, they found a
wad of cash under her mattress.

And she left it for me.

So that's what you used
to start the Chloe. -Yeah.

And then you named it after
her? That's such a sweet tribute.

I didn't actually... -Ice cream!

Hey!

You know, we still haven't been to
the coolest little shop in Brooklyn.

Only real insiders
know about it.

And what about
you? Why New York?

I followed a man.

Did the man know you
were following him?

He did when I snuck into his
apartment, impaled him with an ice pick

and feasted on his remains.

Frightening.

But what's the real reason?

Well, growing up, my mom was an
art history professor at Bard.

So it was winter like
90 months of the year.

So every weekend, she'd
take me to the Hessel Museum.

And she taught me that art tells
stories about people, places,

movements, moments in time.

The coolest thing about my
mom is, she really sees art...

in everything.

Like, anywhere.

What city has more
art than New York?

You know, I think this project is
really having a positive impact on me.

I woke up this morning,
my pillow was totally dry.

And then feel my bag. It's so light.

I am growing too. I have not
called you a hoarder today.

Typical man.

Proud of himself for something
that isn't an achievement.

Okay. Good talk. I'm
gonna go get a coffee.

Do you want anything?

No, I quit coffee. Only water
or booze for this temple.

I'm Paleo.

I'm not sure that's what Paleo means.
-No, no. It has to do with nuts.

Okay. I'm gonna go. -Okay.

Hi there. -Hi.

I'm here for the
72-inch television.

You guys are like the last
book shop on earth, huh?

We're the real deal.
It was my grandfather's.

Oh, okay. Well, I was about
to say something that...

It wouldn't have gone well.
Anyway, thank you so much.

Have a great day. -All right.

Oh, hey! Your case.
-I got it. I know him.

Excuse me. Do you mind?

Move! Oh, my God! Move.

Excuse me. Do you have a moment
for Planned Parenthood? Okay.

Excuse me. Do you have a
moment for Planned Parenthood?

Yes. -Thanks.

I gotta go.

Do you have a moment
for Planned Parenthood?

Oh, you don't care about
reproductive rights?

It's a first edition.

No. -Yeah.

Lucy!

Max!

Hi! Oh, my God.

This is so random.

Hi.

French. -Oh, sorry.

I just got back from
Paris, so still in there.

Right. -This is Amelia.

You saw her the night that...

Are you okay? I'm a doctor, so...

Me? Me? Me good. Me... I'm great.

Because last time... You know.

Right. That night. Oh, my God.

That was such a fun night.

I was just really living my
truth and, like, enjoying myself.

I'm in my mid-20s.

You know, I barely
even wash my face.

And sometimes I
moisturize, if I feel fancy.

But I just have the collagen
ready to go. I'm 26, so...

Lucy! Hi.

There you are.

Got the flat white for you.

I... -Yeah. I'm
her assistant, Nick.

Hey. I'm Max. -Hi.

This one really knows how
to treat her staff, you know?

Staff? -She didn't tell you?

Lucy started her own gallery.

Yeah. Big deal. I mean, it's still
underground, but it's gonna be...

It's gonna blow up. Big. Big
time. Blowing. Lots of blowing up.

That's...

That's exceptional.

Where is it? I'd love to come visit.

And we would also love
you to come visit sometime,

but we are late for
that meeting with that...

Meeting. Larry. -Larry! Larry.

Gagosian?

Yeah. -Yeah.

He's like a... How did
you describe him? Like a...

Oh, he's like a
post-modern teddy bear.

Just the sweetest guy. -Yeah.

You know?

Oh, yeah. -Never met him.

We have to... -Yeah, he
hates it when we're late.

We should really run. -He does.

But great to see you.
-Nice to meet you.

Gagosian? Okay.

Shit.

He's just moved on. It's...

Why is it so hard for
me and so easy for him?

Am I that forgettable? -Are you
kidding me? Max aches for you.

He said so himself. You're the
wild card, the fun, the sparkle.

You think so? -I... He thinks so.

Yes. -Right.

Come on. Let's go in here. -Okay.

Do you think Max and the
doctor have moved in together?

No. No, Max likes his
personal space, so...

She probably has an amazing
but crazy skin care routine.

What if he likes it?

Wait, where are we?

Great, is this the
third attempt at murder?

Can we get it over and done with,
please? Just put me out of my misery.

Hey, Yan. Do your thing.

What? -I'll never
tire of that reaction.

Yan. -Hey, man.
How's the hotel going?

Excellent.

Don't listen to her. She's a
glass-half-full kind of gal.

You're right, yeah. It's
better to be a brooding cynic.

Can you please go get my sign?

So he just makes anything in neon?

Yeah, including a blinking
sign over your head

that says "Keep Back 200 Feet."

Check this out. It's gonna look great
hanging in the lobby of the Chloe.

It's Latin for "Into the middle of
things." It's what the hotel stands for.

It's a place where people will
meet and intersect in our story.

The Chloe will always be a
place they stopped along the way.

See? I have feelings.

Remember when I drove my
car into a parked school bus?

Well, I'm not the
mess you once knew.

I have my shit together.

Promise.

Hey. Who was that? -No one.

Oh, hello, fancy pants.
Where are you off to?

Well, we are going to the bank.

I have that meeting,
and I am terrified.

This is it. Make or break, right?

I'm coming along to play the race
card. -I think it'll be very effective.

Thank you. -Look
on the bright side.

The gallery is bringing
in a bunch of revenue.

No. I'm cautiously optimistic
in a very negative way.

I've lost all hope. -But
we should probably...

Wait, wait. Before
you go, take a seat.

I want you to listen
to this. -We're...

No, come on. It'll just take a
minute. It'll be good for you.

I need to share.

"Dwayne and I met on New Year's Eve.

We stole this bottle of champagne

and resolved to drink it
together the next year.

But Dwayne got sick and
next year never came.

Lately, I've found
myself drinking alone,

but this is the one bottle I
can't bring myself to open."

Nope. Nope!

Nick, are you crying? -Why...?

No. Why would I...? What?

Why wouldn't you cry?
Dwayne is dead, dude.

They're about to drink a bottle
together and now he's a ghost.

He didn't ghost him. He's an actual
ghost. Why would you do that to us?

We said we're about to blackmail
a man into giving us money.

I don't know. Crying's
my favorite activity.

It's true. She's very
good at it. -Thank you.

Last weekend we got together, and we just
re-enacted scenes from The Notebook.

I wrote you every day. -Every day?

I wrote you every day! -I
never stopped thinking...

As much as I admire this budding friendship,
we have to go because we are running late.

Sure.

Upper hands. Okay.
-Marcos, let's go.

You got this. Good luck. -I'm okay.

April, 2006. Maxwell
Desmond's bar mitzvah.

So I show up and I do
my best move for him.

He was just kidding.

He actually had gotten
an over-the-pants handy

from Jenny Gluck that night.

So I've kept this yarmulke as a
reminder that men can hurt you.

"You're not a hoarder."

"Thank you for saying that.
I do really appreciate that."

"You hair looks
great." "Yours does."

"Thanking you..."

Hi. Gallery donation?

Is Nick here? -No.

Just me. Us.

Cool.

Do you want me to tell him you
stopped by? Leave a message?

No.

Okay.

See you later.

"She kind of seemed like a bitch."

"Stop. You can't say that. Go.

No.

No! Think about what you said."

That was sweet but psycho.
Next up, we got Ben.

"I Wanna Know What Love Is."

Hi, thank you, guys, so much
for coming to my... Jeff.

For coming to my birthday.

I know this is a really
important day for all of us,

and, you know, as I was
reflecting on my last 27 years,

I was kind of thinking
ahead to my death.

What is happening? -Eyes up.

And I was thinking that at my
funeral, I wanna be taxidermied

and I want a photo booth so people
can come and take photos of me.

And I'll have wine and
hats and different things.

What do you guys think
of that? -Inspired!

Happy birthday, Amanda!
-Happy birthday, Amanda.

How's it going? -Hi!

I picked up your dead man
cake... -Oh, my God, thank you.

...that you asked a
stranger to get for you.

This is my wife Randy and
that's my baby inside of her.

Oh, my God, tell us everything
about being pregnant.

Pretty terrible so far.

Well, the making of it
was fun, the creating it.

I'll shut up.

I wanna murder your face!

I love you!

I wanna push you down the
stairs, I love you so much.

Do you ever worry
about Jeff's safety?

Oh, he's a dead man, but
it is the rule of friendship

you can't really testify against
your friends, so I know nothing.

Totally. -Hey, I have
something to show you.

- We're in New York
Magazine, baby! -Oh, my God. What?

- I know.
It's... -Shit.

This is amazing news. -Can't
wait until Max sees this.

- I have moved from denial
to anger. -What do you mean?

Oh, the five stages of grief. I
am angry at Max and I want revenge.

And I'm not talking about squirting
lube all over his good suits.

Is that something that you've done?

We open the gallery with
a Broken Hearts ball.

Gatsby style. Call every
influencer in New York.

Honestly, I'd love to say yes, Lucy,
but I haven't heard if I got the loan.

It's not looking good.
I'm really worried.

But if I get it... -We can do it?

We can do it.

Yes! -I don't know when.

All right, next up we got Lucy and Nick
singing "Don't Go Breaking My Heart."

I don't really...
Lucy, I don't sing.

We haven't spoken about this, but I
have a really shocking singing voice.

Karaoke's not about talent. It's
about commitment. Everyone knows that.

Yeah, but I'll make
a fool of myself.

That is one of life's greatest
pleasures. I should know.

Do we have Lucy? Do we
have Nick? -Yep, coming up.

I'm sober. I'm dead sober.

Thought you might say
that. -Here's some shots.

Okay, no, this is very... We actually...
-No, no, no, that's perfect. Thank you.

What's your excuse
now, huh? -Nothing.

We got this, Nick. No,
Nick! -I'm gonna go.

I like this song.

Oh, damn.

I love you!

Am I on the right
rhythm? -Oh, that's good.

Nick, everyone!

Does everyone remember
that it's my birthday?

How sad are you gonna be when I
die? -Terrified of life without you.

Unless there's kids involved and
it will probably fill up that void.

But you'll be missed.

You can't marry within a year.
-I won't. Who would I marry?

Which one of my friends
would you marry? -Amanda.

Just kidding. It's not like
I've thought about it before.

I think that's a good fit. -Right?

I approve of that.

You guys talking about death
again? -It's our foreplay.

Do it now.

Yes, ma'am.

You're cute When you
beep-beep-beep, how do you...?

It's not a joke, that's
okay. -That wasn't a truck...

Can't compare me to a truck. -It
wasn't a truck, but it was like...

It was a truck backing up.

So let me ask you something. -Sure.

You're spending every
day with her, right? -Yes.

Dude, I haven't seen you this happy
since... Don't make me say her name.

Okay, can we not talk
about this, please, Marcos?

You are a straight,
white dude in America.

If your only thing is that you
don't wanna fall in love, like...

Can you please...? -Cry me a river.

Marcos, can we please
not do this? -We are.

We are in the conversation
you don't wanna be in.

And I'm saying it... No,
I'm saying goodbye. Okay?

Oh, my God. You guys, I...

I'm getting too skinny.
I'm wasting away right now.

I think it's really important
that we go get tacos, like...

I want a taco and I
wanna sleep in a taco.

I wanna drive a taco. -Let's go.

But wait, where is Nick? Did he...?

Oh, he drove Marcos and Randy home.

Why do you keep talking about Nick?
You should put your penis in his vagina.

Oh, I should put my penis
in his vagina? -Yeah.

I wanna get a taco first,
then you can... -Okay.

Penis, penis, penis. -Okay.

Tacos first.
-Tacos, tacos, tacos.

Where did Jeff go?

Oh, he's waiting in
bed for me in his mask.

That's... Oh, God.

I know you love it, you're
into that. -It's too much.

Okay.

Remember me?

Hey, Max.

What are you doing here?
-Just hoping we could talk.

Okay.

Go on.

I don't really know where to start.

I guess...

How about "I'm sorry for causing the
worst breakup in the world's history"?

Or "I'm sorry for using you like
a stepping stone for my career

like Sigourney Weaver
in Working Girl"?

Or "I'm sorry for treating you
like my own personal sanitary napkin

that I bled onto heavily in
the heaviest part of my period."

You know that second day of your
period where you're gushing blood?

I've heard of it.
-That's what you did.

And you didn't even
have the courtesy

to wrap it in toilet paper
when you threw it away.

Sorry. -You belong in
jail for what you've done.

We're gonna put a hex on you.
-Yeah, we're bloody witches.

Ladies, that's enough.

Where are your effing socks?

That's a good question. -This
is weird for us now, so...

Great friends. -Yep.

They brought out
some excellent points.

I'm so sorry.

I don't think I can
live without you.

What about Amelia? -Amelia.

Come on. Amelia? We broke up.

I haven't stopped thinking
about you since I ran into you

and then I read about you
in New York Magazine.

I was wrong about you, Lucy.

I wanna be with you.

I don't know.

Hey.

Hey. -What's this guy doing here?

Why is your assistant
talking to me like that?

I'm not her assistant, guy.

Why are you bringing her
a cake at 3 a. m., guy?

Because I can. -Guys.

It's okay.

I was dropping this off.

Custom single-layered cake.

You brought me
Amanda's cake? -Yeah.

Well, you know, Marcos
paid for it, and...

I don't know, he really
likes you, so I thought I'd...

Marcos likes me.

Right.

Yeah.

We were kind of in the
middle of something.

I'm gonna go.

Hey.

How about it? Let's have a drink.

I mean, you've seen it so many times, but
Harvard's in the corner, she's cowering.

Oh, my God. -I'm
like, "This is crazy."

I really miss the
Woolf Gallery. -You do?

Yeah, of course.
It was my dream job.

It was run by a woman
so ahead of her time,

she gave space and a voice to artists no
one deigned to care about or listen to.

See, I never even
knew you felt that way.

You never asked.

You never really asked
me about myself, ever.

I know I made a detour... -A detour?
That's what we're calling that?

Your GPS just didn't work the day
you cheated on me, or what's...?

It wasn't a detour,
it was a big mistake.

Please give me another chance?

And you're serious about this?

Would you close your eyes?

Okay. -Can you put your hands out?

Okay, open them. -Wait.

What? How did you get this?

I took it.

Our love story's not over.

You broke into the gallery?

Wow, we really need to work
on the security situation.

Just have dinner with me, please?

I'm actually... I have a lot
of late night commitments, so...

I figured you'd say that, so I
thought about: "What about breakfast?"

Oh, yeah, no, I'm not a morning
person, so that won't work.

There is a meal
somewhere in the middle.

Do you know what it's
called? -Fine. Lunch.

But no booze, except for rosé.
But that's just pink water.

Hey! I picked up some vintage rackets.
Thought they might look cool in here, right?

Is everything okay?

I didn't get the loan.

So this is it.

Oh, shit. I'm... I'm so sorry, Nick.

This really sucks.

But, hey, we can
figure something out.

This is just a setback.
-It's not a setback.

This is real life, Lucy.

You know, we can't all live in your
fantasy land of magical thinking.

I can't just go into a closet, wish
really hard, and it will all work out.

That's not how life works.

That's what you think of me?

If the Chloe closes, the gallery
closes too. We're in this together.

No, we're not. Okay?

I let myself get
distracted, but not anymore,

so take your stuff
and get out of here.

So that's it? -Yeah. That's it.

Okay.

Yeah, you can just shut me out, but
I made a commitment to every person

that walked through that door
with their heart on their sleeve.

I am not giving up.

And you shouldn't either.

If you'll just meet with me,

I can show you the Broken Heart Gallery
takes a whole new approach to art.

We're trending on Twitter.
We have 50.000 followers.

Everyone is damaged. Have you
ever been heartbroken? Hello?

Hello?

Oh, my God. He hung up on me.

That was the last one.

I've tried every gallery in
the greater tristate area.

You haven't tried everyone.

Oh, right, yeah.

I'm sure Eva just misses watching me
eat my own ass in front of her eyes.

Her and her friends, just:

You never know unless you try.

No. Eva, she gave me a second chance.
She's not about to give me a third.

Well, what if a handsome man,

with a cute, cute butt,
put in a good word for you

and all you have to do is pick
up the phone and see what happens?

Really? -Maybe.

Cliffhanger.

You're erratic, irresponsible,
and, quite frankly, a liability.

It's young people like you who
reaffirm my choice not to procreate.

The last time I saw you was like listening
to Brad Pitt talk about architecture.

It just went on and
on and on. -Right.

And on and on and on.

It was utterly relentless.

Please give me a chance.

The Broken Heart Gallery,
it's changed my life.

Clearly, otherwise, you
wouldn't be here groveling.

Oh, well, I think
groveling is a strong term.

This is the definition of groveling.

I've learned a few things in my day.

Never look at your body naked
under a fluorescent light.

It's only okay to bounce a check once.
After that, it's a thing you're known for.

And when you see talent, grab it.

I'd like to include
the Broken Heart Gallery

as an exhibit here at
the Woolf in one week.

Show your collection alongside mine.

What?

Did I drop acid and
this is my ego death?

No, no. It's a huge opportunity.

Don't worry, I'm gonna be here to
guide you every step of the way.

Oh, that won't be
necessary. Thank you.

Oh, my God. Thank you so, so much.

I mean, I don't even
know what to say.

What do you say when Michael Fassbender
invites you to lie naked by his pool?

I do have one condition.

I have been working
so hard for this.

This is literally a
lifelong dream come true.

Well, let me be the first to say
"congratulations" and "you're welcome."

Come on, let's go celebrate.

Sorry, I'm late. I got caught up...
-Cool, cool, cool. I don't care.

Teach me how to break
up with someone. -What?

Just walk me through
your dumping process.

We don't call it that. It sounds
harsh. Wait, why are we doing this?

Because I just... I need to
let Max go. Once and for all.

Good.

Teach me. I'm your vessel.

Most stories are
stories of... betrayal.

And ours is a story of hope.

Hope that what we shared
will guide you... home.

Yeah.

Come closer. -Okay.

Thank you...

for being my home.

Oh, my God. -I know.

Oh, my God! -I know!

Okay, but I'm definitely
not doing that.

Hey. Is it time for dinner?

I just wanna know. What
happened with Amelia?

You know what happened. That's over.

Just be honest with me.

I really thought I
was gonna marry her.

And she wasn't ready.

And she moved to Paris.

And then she came back right when
she sensed you could be happy,

which is always how that happens.

So you kept hurting me
because she kept hurting you.

I didn't mean to hurt
you. -No, of course not.

You're the hero of your love
story and the villain in mine.

We're just not meant to be together.

I'm gonna go.

Paris, it's an amazing place, and...

We were staying at La Bristol,
which is incredibly fancy.

It's a little
overrated, if you ask me.

I drew a bath, and I wanted
her to get in it with me.

Personally, I hate baths. They're
a warm, wet place to overthink.

So she left to get a
pastry for... five hours.

I bummed a cigarette off of Olivier.

I sat in the tub, shriveling.

So, naturally, I realized
I had to move to Paris.

I kept the bath water.

Oh, sweet Jesus, he was gorgeous.

I drank a little.

So, in conclusion,
I've made hoarding chic.

You'd be proud. A triumph
for pack rats everywhere.

Who are you talking to?

No one.

You are always making these
weird, sneaky phone calls

and leaving messages for someone.

Are you here to talk about my phone
bill? Or are you here to apologize?

I'm sorry.

Option B. Excellent choice.

You were the first
person I wanted to tell.

Miraculously, a private lender
backed me and I got the loan.

What? -I did it, I got it.

You got...? That's amazing! You're
not the only one with good news.

Eva Woolf wants to make
the Broken Heart Gallery

a reality by sponsoring
it at the Woolf.

No way.

And despite you
being a dick monster,

since the hotel is gonna be saved,

I wanna keep the
exhibit at the Chloe.

I'm really happy for you, Lucy.

You deserve it.

I'm sorry. I've never had a guy
be happy for my success before.

It's kind of weird,
but... No, it's good.

Wait. How are we gonna
pull it off in time?

Please. I've been waiting my
whole life to pull this off.

Anastasia, Irina, Valeria, Yulia...

I need to make it right with the Russians
or Putin is gonna have me poisoned.

We did it.

We did.

We're good together you and
me. A monster and a human.

A what and a who?

Well, humans need
monsters to stir things up,

and monsters need humans to
fix everything they break.

It's just simple science.

Do you think, in life, you
ever get to feel successful?

Or is it just an illusion,

like, at any given moment, it
could be taken away from you

because it was never
yours to begin with?

I think everyone feels that way.

No one tells you that being an adult is
just walking around, feeling like a fraud.

You know?

Like, who gave me a credit card?

And how do I cancel my
gym membership? It's...

What does Congress even do?

But you do know what
Congress does, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Do you have any plans tomorrow?

What do you wanna do?

Well, you know those sneaky
phone calls I've been making?

I wanna introduce you to someone.

I'm in.

Good morning, boys.
Brought your lotto tickets.

And I got a good
feeling about this one.

Remember the deal: We're
gonna split this even. Okay?

We got a witness, so...

Hey, Joe.

I brought your spicy snacks, but don't
tattle on me like last time, okay?

That's my guy.

Hey, Cheryl.

Hi.

Who's the dime?

Nick, this is Cheryl.

Nice to meet you.

This little slice isn't
your girlfriend, is she?

No. I'm as single as a dollar bill.

Want a cocktail? I'm buying.

Sure. I mean, it's 5:00
somewhere, right? Huh, Cheryl?

Can I sit here? -Yeah,
sit down, take a load off.

Look at you.

Want to play a board game?

Monopoly.

My all-time favorite.

Me too.

I used to play almost every
night with my daughter...

Lucy.

Lucy.

I'm sorry, I didn't...

Yeah. Yeah, so if you could just stop
flirting with my mother, that'd be great.

Her mother. I am far too young.

Look at this body. It's as
tight as a Mormon teenager.

Mom! -What?

Are you jealous?

You know, a wise woman once
told me jealousy is unbecoming.

Oh, really?

You said that.

I love piano players.

Is he your boyfriend? -No.

Well, you can't marry him.
-No. No, I would never.

I'm going to.

Is that so? -Yeah.

Well, I'll be maid of honor, then.

Okay.

I love this song.

We used to listen to
this when I cooked dinner.

"Cooked" is a very strong word
for what you used to do with food.

Come and dance with me.

Thank you.

Thank you for taking me today.

Thank you for being there.

It's usually hard,

but today was really nice.

Do you want to have a drink with me?

Yeah.

We're not gonna drink down here.

We're going to a bar?

Can you come with me?

Okay.

I've never been in here.

I wanna show you something.

Shut up with that secret trapdoor.

Just follow me. Come on.

Watch your head.

What is this? Hipster Narnia?

You just made this secret,
sexy bar on your own?

Well, I have many hidden talents.

Oh, how about you just casually
tickling the ivories back there?

Way to bury the lede, Piano Man.

Which one?

Here's to finishing what we started.

To finishing what we started.

Well...

So...

I just saw you naked.

That is how sex works.

Right.

But we're...

We're friends.

What if we're more than friends?

How do we find out?

You know, I've honestly
been sitting here,

just racking my brain
through ways to figure it out.

And I only seem to have
come up with one solution.

What's that?

I think we gotta do it again.

Yeah, me too.

Meet me at the neon store
at 10 a. m. tomorrow.

I have another
surprise for you.

A surprise?

Count monster in.

So now that you and Nick are...

Is that what you think
heterosexual sex looks like?

Makes me nervous just thinking about
it, but now that you guys are, you know,

what have you collected from him?

A safety net because
she rescued him.

Well, we're partners.
Partners help each other.

And visit each other's
moms. -That's very serious.

Oh, and by the way, my
mom fully hit on him.

Cheryl is a legend.

Oh, yes. Cheryl. -Get it, Cheryl.

Lucy.

How much I owe you? -No,
no, no. These are on me.

It's the least I could do.

Your gallery has helped me so much.

After Dwayne died, I was lost.

One minute we were laughing,
stealing that bottle of champagne.

And the next...

I kept everything that he owned.

The thought of letting go meant facing
reality and I just couldn't, so...

Again, you really helped.

Thank you. -Thank you.

So I'll see you at the gallery
opening? -Yes. Most definitely.

And I'm gonna bring a date.

Nice.

Look at you, Oprah,
healing the masses.

I think what Amanda is trying
to say is, you're very inspiring.

You should have your own TED Talk. -No,
I'm trying to say she's Dolly Parton.

We had eight blissful
years together.

He was really focused
on work, but...

That's what I loved about him.

His passion, his intellect.

This is how I like to remember him.

I mean, isn't he beautiful?

Nick?

So if you just wanna come through...

Lucy.

Hi.

Hi.

I...

This is my...

I'm Chloe.

Lucy. Wait. Stop, okay?

Chloe? As in the Chloe Hotel?

You told me it was for your
grandma. -No, I didn't. You assumed.

Like you always do.

You never corrected me.

You built this for her? -No.

Are you with her? -No. If
you just give me a second

to explain it to
you... -Explain what?

You mocked me for keeping Max's tie
and you built a hotel in her honor?

That's not fair. You
started a gallery for Max.

No. No. You don't get to do that.

I showed you exactly who I
am. From the very beginning.

I introduced you to my mom.

And now you've lied to me? I feel
like... I don't... I don't even know you.

I wanted to tell you, okay? I
just didn't know when or how.

It's not easy for me to
open up like it is for you.

No, it's not easy for anyone, Nick.

The best part about being selfish
is, you get to do it alone.

This is clearly a bad
time. I'm gonna go.

No. Your name is on
the door. You stay.

I'll go.

Hey. I guess she slipped this under the
door one night when I was working late.

I didn't find it, you know,
until two years after we broke up.

Tonya's out of my life. -Obviously.

I had to dump her ass, you know?
Like N'Sync. Like "Bye, Bye, Bye."

Hey, guys! -Okay, I don't...

Is Lucy home?

She's on the roof? Great. Thanks.

Just so you know, if a gorgeous
woman just pushed you off the roof,

and she, you know... She was wearing a
blue, really, like, beautiful jumpsuit.

And you fell to the ground
and you just died instantly.

And your lifeless body was
just kind of sitting there.

And then this other girl...
-Who's also gorgeous.

Gorgeous. -Who's a
stay-at-home model.

Stay-at-home model
in a purple top.

If she was just driving this monster truck
and she just kept running over your face.

Just over and over
and over and over.

Yeah. And, like, you were
completely not recognizable anymore.

We would say it was an accident. Yeah.
And we have two alibis and a Jeff.

And I know from law school,
that's a really strong case.

Ironclad.

Cool.

Okay. Goodbye. Nice to...

Jeff. Great.

Listen, I wanted to tell you that...

What?

The Broken Hearts Ball is your night,
and I just wanted you to know that...

I'm gonna steer clear
of the hotel, okay?

The Chloe Hotel?

For what it's worth, I was
only showing her around.

I named the hotel after her a long time
ago, and it got too late and too expensive...

to change it.

I'm sorry.

Okay.

Many artists have
fallen in love with me.

I didn't see you there. But,
yes, I know about all your lovers.

That's a very strange
thing to say. Very odd.

I have something for
your installation.

I married a man who was
jealous about everything.

If I was enthusiastic
about a book, about a place,

about a flower,
about a human being...

jealous.

There's nothing inside.

I left him. I sold the ring.

I started the Woolf Gallery,

and I vowed to represent artists
who made me feel enthusiastic.

I never looked back.

Did you regret marrying him?

Never.

I wouldn't be me if our
paths hadn't crossed.

I also wouldn't be
me if I hadn't let go.

Pain, my dear, is inevitable.

It's what you do
with it that matters.

Hey, what's up?
-Hey. How you doing?

What are you doing?

Oh, hello! Thank you. -I've
never seen her do that before.

That's weird.

I don't really know
what I'm doing here.

I don't know. I've never
been broken up with.

I don't know what it
is about this room,

but there's something about
it that's so much less...

"Hoardery"?

Doesn't look like a homeless woman
just lives here in her free time.

You know what? I should throw
you guys out in the trash.

Marie Kondo your
asses. How about that?

Is Nick coming tonight? -Yeah.
Inquiring minds wanna know.

Don't know, don't care. It's
my night. I'm just doing me.

Fine. Later. -No, now.

You always say later and
you never pay. -I always pay.

You owe me so much... -Pay?
Wait, what? What is going on here?

What secrets do you hold? -Nothing.

Nadine?

We bet that you and Nick
would get back together.

I said no. I won,
obviously. I always win.

You what? -We bet on
all your relationships.

How do you think I
afford this lifestyle?

Wait. How much have you
bet over the years? -Like...

Pennies. -Barely anything.

No, tell me right now.
You tell me. You...

Seven hundred and
ninety-eight dollars, 34 cents.

Now? You choose to speak now?
Oh, we're getting a divorce.

We were never married.

Well, hurry up and ask me so I
can fricking divorce you already!

Will you marry me? -Get out!

That's why I think possums are pretty much
the coolest animal in the entire world.

But if you're gonna have possums in there,
meerkats need to be in the conversation.

They can stand up on hind legs like
this, looking around everywhere.

They also can run on four legs.
Feed them bugs if they were your pet.

They run around in the desert.

Don't touch that jerky. It's
too close to the bug spray.

So you're really not
coming? -I don't know, man.

Don't feel well and I'm worried
about the hotel opening and...

I think I'm coming down
with a fever. So, yeah.

Do you mind feeling my forehead?

It's really hot,
right? -You're fine.

That's what I thought.

We have to go. I didn't put
heels on to show up late.

Real comforting. You guys
are gonna be great parents.

A sick man disgusts me. You need
to explain to him what's going on.

No, I don't. He's a
moron. Look at him.

Like you're so evolved?

All men are morons. We let you run
things. -Not the humanity speech.

You ruined the planet, started wars,
killed the bees. You raped and pillaged.

And if you opened your eyes to
what was going on in the world,

you'd never stop crying.

I feel I had nothing to do
with that, but I will take it.

As far as men go? He's
way stupider than I am.

You do realize I'm standing
right here and I can hear you?

Yeah, well, I pointed at you.

Listen up. You're not sick. You
need to tell him what's going on.

No, I don't. -I will be outside.

Can you please come back?
-We're not going to be late!

All right.

Nick, you're not sick,
buddy. -Oh, I feel very ill.

Right. You're heartbroken,
bro. -No, I'm not.

Yeah, you are. -No, I'm not.

Where do you think the money came
from? -I don't know. Where did...? What?

The loan that saved your ass. -Yes?

The hotel you named after
another woman? -What about it?

Remember that mysterious
private lender, Nick?

Lucy convinced Eva Woolf
to float you the money, man.

She saved your ass. It's like
she's your knight in shining armor

and you're the stupidest
princess I have ever met.

No. You know what? I'm not a
stupid princess. Take these.

I didn't mean it literally.
Don't take offense.

Oh, so I'll just pay for this...?

I can't believe you did
this with your crazy.

My crazy is beautiful.

Crazy beautiful.

I mean, team spirit or... What?
I don't know. Where's Jeff?

I hate him. I love him. I mean, I
hate him. What are you doing to me?

How's this?

My body's not rejecting it. -No?

No, that's too much. Don't.

Hello, hoarders and art freaks.

Welcome to the Broken Heart Gallery.

Yes! Yes.

This gallery does not have
hundred-thousand-dollar paintings

or precious sculptures.

It has... crap. A lot of it.

But these are the things we keep,

the souvenirs that tell
the stories of our lives,

even if that is a
half-eaten crab cake.

Hey, I need that order.
-I thought you canceled it.

Yeah. Can you
un-cancel it? -Yeah.

I began collecting

because I lost someone
a long time ago.

Her body is still here,
but her memory is gone.

So, in many ways,
she is gone too.

My mother was my first heartbreak.

I was afraid I would end up like her,
that I would forget and be forgotten.

So I clung to things, which
kept me from moving forward.

Heartbreak is the loneliest, most
isolating feeling in the world.

And the truth is, it
happens to us all.

It is the great equalizer.

And without heartbreak, I
wouldn't have built this place.

So, I guess, in the end,
the thing that broke me...

also made me whole.

Lucy! Sorry. Excuse me. Sorry.

Sorry.

Okay.

Lucy.

So I'd like to direct your attention
to some of the installations...

Lucy!

Well, this is awkward.

Nick! What are you doing?

What does it look like?
It's... It's a grand gesture.

This is kind of a bad time.

If you just wanna wait patiently,
quietly, until I'm done...

No. No, I can't do that.

The map was mine.

Wait. What? -The map.

I put the map in here.
I know I said he...

It's kind of random. I don't know.
I was just trying to throw you off.

I met Chloe working at
a hotel. And she was...

I fell in love with her.

And then she left me for my boss.

And I was devastated.

And I promised myself that I would never
let anyone make me feel that way again.

And then I met you.

And so I put the map on the wall
because I wanted to see you again.

Could have just asked me
to dinner or something.

Yeah. In hindsight. -Next time.

Probably. Good thing, you know?

But love makes you do crazy,
stupid, irrational things, and...

And I guess what I'm trying
to say, Lucy, is I love you.

Try it again. Try it again.

I love you, Lucy.

Yeah, I heard you. Gonna
get back to my speech now.

Maybe I should just...

You should stay. -Sort of
awkward that you're not...

Oh, my God.

Love him back! Right?

Yeah, I think you should love him
back. -You should love him back.

I know that was sweet, but you
don't know what the context is, so...

Love him back. -Love him back!

Love him back! Love him back!
-Oh, we're chanting? We're chanting now.

Love him back! Love him back!
-Whoa, okay. Okay, this is...

Love him back! Love him back!

Okay, enough! Be quiet.

Just... Excuse me.
Thank you, excuse me.

Hi.

I'm a lump of coal. I feel nothing.

I changed the
name of the hotel.

It's no big deal.

Okay, if I didn't do this, they would
all turn on me, so this is for them.

You're the only person I
didn't collect anything from.

Why's that?

Because I love you too.

Okay, okay.

Okay. Hi. Okay...

This is the bottle from the
first whiskey we shared together.

And this is the pen Lucy
used to defile my hotel,

and this is the hotel room key from when
Lucy and I first started connecting...

What are you doing?

I'm doing the thing about the stuff,
you know, that the other people did.

I'm sorry. She has no manners.

Okay, that's cute, but you don't need
this because we're never breaking up.

Not even in a zombie apocalypse.

I'm sorry, he's such a hoarder.

We don't use that
term. It's derogatory.

No, taught you so well.

The End

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