Original subtitles

Subtitles by explosiveskull

Great art comes from suffering.

That's true. We all lead relatively safe lives.

We're fighting wars overseas,

but you'd never know it from walking around Brooklyn.

Then there's your emotional suffering,

but no one has got time for your emotional suffering.

They've got everybody working so hard.

People don't have time to see their kids!

You think they have time for your art?

No.

Terrorism happens!

Or some big bad thing happens every few days in the news!

And everybody's saying,

"Why are you wasting your time on art?

There are more important things happening in the world."

But what artists do is as important as anything else.

Society's always against the artists,

because artists have something to say

'cause they present uncomfortable truth!

We're all looking at the same world.

An artist sees how fucked up it is,

and that maybe it doesn't have to be that way.

To have someone looking at your art

and have them get that perspective,

that can be profound.

But you can't have that perspective

unless you unchain yourself from everything society tells you!

Start with this.

Everything your mother taught you was wrong.

Thank you, thank you, Mr. Levkowitz.

Thank you very much.

Fucking...

Fucking shit!

Ow! Fuck!

- Yo. - Hey, man.

Hey.

Hey.

You know, real life is bullshit.

You spend all this time in art school,

and then people think that you just paint for a hobby.

Ugh, my God.

- Just had a meeting with a gallery owner. - Oh.

Yeah. He told me I wasn't dark enough.

Did you tell him to go fuck himself?

No. He's friends with my dad.

Yo.

I'm so cold.

My landlord turned off my heat.

Can they do that?

I'm not supposed to be living there.

And I didn't pay my rent, so yeah, they can do that, I guess.

Thanks, Kelsey.

Yeah. Hey, you slept with Chloe Brown, right?

Yeah, like three years ago in the pottery room at school.

I mean, I get that she's hot and everything, but she's just

like this puddle of shallow bullshit, and her art sucks.

Her pussy paintings were really cool.

Oh, yeah, she's so cool

that she could put pictures of her trimmed cute little vagina out there

and call that art.

What's wrong with that?

All I'm gonna say is that a vagina by any other name is just a cunt.

Where have you been?

Stephanie, you didn't tell me you were coming over.

I don't have much time.

I have to get a train back to Greenwich.

Move in with me.

I'm married.

I have a house.

But you love me.

I don't see why you can't just be happy with things the way they are.

Your mother says that even when you get what you want, you are never happy.

Yeah. She knows me so well.

What do you have to complain about?

Your life is great.

You're not poor.

Your parents are nice.

Those things seem like advantages in life.

They're not helping me as an artist.

Talk about a white people problem.

I'm white.

All I have is white people problems.

What other kind of problems am I supposed to have all the sudden?

It's not my fault I haven't suffered.

You're always suffering or sufferable.

You know, you don't actually have to lead a miserable life to be an artist.

That's just a romantic stereotype.

What do you know?

You live in the suburbs.

Outside of pot and chardonnay, you don't know anything about the world.

Don't get down on me for wanting to have a nice, comfortable life.

I just think there's more to life than that.

You know, it's... it's pretty cute that you care so much about this.

But don't tell your mom that we're fucking without a condom, okay? It's weird.

It's weird because you're married to somebody else.

Okay. I have to go.

Don't go.

I have to pick up the dry cleaning before I go home... To my husband.

Love you.

We had, uh, dinner with Stephanie and her husband last week.

You shouldn't have let that one go.

She broke up with me. I wasn't happy about it.

Well, her husband's a charming guy.

And he's loaded.

He's an asshole.

He's older than you. It's gross.

Whatever happened with that meeting I set you up with last week, Levkowitz?

He didn't like my work.

I'm sorry, sweetheart. I think it's really good.

- I know you do. - Hmm.

Mom.

Um,

you know how you always say that you want to support me as an artist?

Anything I can do.

I had this idea for a project, and it involves you.

Um, and I think it could be really, really interesting and... and edgy and...

and powerful.

- How can I help? - I want you to sit for me.

I want to do a portrait of you.

A nude.

I don't think so, honey, I mean I'm...

I... I love you. I want to be supportive, but, uh, no.

This is... is... this is the thing with you, right?

You want to be supportive, but when it comes down to it, you don't.

That is not true.

- Then come on, Mom. - I'm not sitting naked in front of you.

This is important, Mom.

Th... not just for me. Like this is important as a piece of art.

Important how?

It'll examine the mother and son relationship from a whole new perspective.

A perspective with no barriers.

A... and what aspects of our relationship are you planning on exploring?

There's the psychological aspect.

- Mm-hmm. - Like how you fucked up my whole way of thinking.

Is that what you think?

For example.

And then, yes, there is the sexual aspect.

Okay, stop. That's just disgusting.

I'm willing to go there

if that's where I need to go to be true to my art.

Forget it. I am 47 years old. I'm your mother. It... it's weird.

I'm not doing it.

I'm not going to sit naked in a room in front of you

so you could explore whatever weird sexual fantasies you have about me.

You don't like the idea of sitting in a room with me naked,

or you don't like the idea at all?

I can see how the idea is interesting, but I'm sorry.

I'm not that liberated.

What if I did it from pictures?

Like selfies?

No, no. No, not selfies.

I would have to get a friend to come and take pictures of you,

and then I would paint it from those.

It's not gonna be as good, but it's a start.

And maybe if you saw the potential of what I'm trying to do,

you would change your mind.

Mom, this could be incredible.

Hey, do you have 300 dollars I could borrow?

I know I owe you some money already.

How about this? I need someone to take some pictures for a project I'm working on.

Yeah? You'll pay me?

- Three hundred bucks. - Shit.

I would do it for free for you, you know,

- if I didn't need the money. - I know.

All right, it's in Larchmont,

you're gonna have to take a train from Grand Central and a cab from the station.

Who's the model?

It's my mother.

I want you to do some nudes for a series of paintings I'm doing.

Really, your mom? That's cool.

- You think? - Yeah. I mean, that could be really interesting.

I'm trying to push myself into some darker material. And I just...

There's something not entirely right about our relationship.

What kind of poses do you want?

Standard dynamic poses. Maybe something reclining. Get as many angles as you can.

It means a lot that you trust me with this.

Yeah, man. I know you'll get me what I need.

I mean, with your mom.

Yeah.

Hey.

Is that David Crays?

Yeah, that's him. I've seen him in here a few times.

He's one of my favorite painters.

- Someone you don't hate? - Shut up.

- Have you ever spoken to him? - No way. He's scary looking.

I'm gonna buy him a drink.

Hi. You're David Crays, right, the painter?

I took a class on transgressive art in school,

and I really flipped out when I saw your paintings.

I mean, they seriously changed my life.

Um.

Okay, well, I don't want to keep you. I just wanted to buy you a drink.

Excuse me?

Hi, could I get two of whatever he's having, please?

You got ID?

- Seriously? - Seriously.

But I come in here all the time. You know what? Whatever.

Here you go.

Sit down.

My name's Johnny. I'm 41.

- So what's up, guys? - Right. Your energy is hot through the whole...

Guys.

This... this is David.

I thought we'd be alone.

Oh, no, no, no. These are... this is Hannah and Christina. They're my roommates.

Oh, it's right there.

Ah!

You cannot bring him in here.

- Why not? - He's a homeless person.

He's not homeless. He's a famous painter.

- You're not going to have sex with him, are you? - Oh my God...

He's like 90.

Okay, like it's better than that frat boy you brought home the other week

- that came all over the couch. - Well, he was my age at least.

- That was really disappointing. - Okay, guys, just please be cool.

I might have bled a little in there.

Ew.

Come on. He's just kidding.

You came, didn't you?

Yeah, but what about you?

I don't cum.

- Hi. Quinn, right? - Hi.

Hi.

Uh, Dan talks about you all the time.

- I can't believe we have never met before. - We met at graduation.

Oh, yeah. Right, of course.

Uh, Dan is embarrassed by us, so, uh, we hardly ever get to meet his friends.

Well, he's just trying to do things on his own.

Yeah, which is why he wants to do these paintings, right?

Yeah, I think it's a really great idea.

Listen, I'm really nervous, if you can't tell.

It's okay. So am I.

Okay.

Good morning.

Did you paint that?

I like that very much.

It reminds me of something I might've done when I was younger.

Yeah, it was, um, it was an exercise for class.

We were supposed to do a painting in the style of a painter we love. Just...

- So you chose me. - Yeah.

No wonder I like it.

Can we get a drink now?

Uh, it's still kind of early.

It's almost 11.

- Oh, shit. I got to go to... I got to go to work. I... - You going to your studio?

Yeah, I wish. No, I work at a coffee house.

But you can stay here as long as you want.

See you at the bar later?

Yeah, if you want.

I do.

- Okay. - Do you have any money?

Uh, yeah, I have a 20 in my room.

I'll pay you back later.

Okay.

I love this record collection.

These all Dan's?

No, uh, those are mine, mostly.

Hardly ever listen to them anymore.

You're really beautiful.

Stop.

You're making me blush.

You haven't even taken your clothes off yet.

It has been a while since I have been naked in front of someone who's not my husband.

It's not like he even notices.

I'll notice.

That doesn't help.

I'm old.

There was a woman in her 80s that came into school to pose all the time.

And younger ones, too, I'm sure.

They weren't all eye candy.

So, um,

what, do I just take off my clothes?

Normally, a model will get undressed in private and put a robe on.

But I think you should just start taking your clothes off now.

Okay.

Like this?

Slower.

Now take off your bra.

Okay, here goes.

You look incredible.

Lie down on the couch.

Okay.

Unbuckle your jeans.

So, is that good?

Very.

I feel bad.

I'm married.

Oh, yeah.

You never cheated on your husband before?

Once.

It was an art dealer, actually.

He was a fun guy.

I feel bad about Dan.

He was onto something good here.

- Hmm. - Trusted me.

We can take them now.

I wouldn't be so nervous.

Okay.

Hmm.

Is your husband coming back soon?

No.

He's at work.

Can you get that?

Dan.

Hey, I got your pictures.

Oh, great.

I'll get your... I'll get your money. I'll be right back.

You're Quinn, right?

I heard a lot about you.

- Stephanie. - Hmm.

Cool.

What pictures?

Just something Dan asked me to help him out on.

Hmm, that's very secretive.

Yep, it's all good.

Thanks, man. Really helps out.

Nice meeting you.

You too.

That's who you got to take pictures of your mother?

How do you know about that?

She told me. No wonder she got so weird about it.

What are you talking about?

When I asked her about it, she turned red.

Quinn is my best friend.

Would you send Quinn to take naked pictures of me?

No, but that's different.

Why? Because I'm not your mother?

'Cause, you know, just 'cause she's your mother,

doesn't mean that she's not a hot MILF to someone else.

She's a married woman, like... The hell's wrong with you?

You are just the most innocent person sometimes.

Are you really ready to live in this world?

- Let's see the photos. - No!

- Why not? - Because I told her I wouldn't show anybody else.

- She wouldn't care if I saw them. - Maybe I would.

Are you really gonna paint something with those pictures,

or did you just have them taken for your own entertainment?

So a minute ago, I was too innocent,

and now I'm the weird pervert who jerks off to pictures of his mom?

- Then why did you do it? - 'Cause I thought it was a good idea.

And it never occurred to you that maybe no one else wants to live

in your creepy mother fantasy world with you?

Apparently, you do.

Fine.

I'm leaving.

But you haven't heard the end of this.

Yeah, I went to it. And that was it.

Yeah, it's the same...

Same issue. Same concern. Hey.

Hi.

This drink is on me. Here's the 20 I owe ya.

Oh, thank you.

Did you sell a painting?

As a matter of fact, I did.

Congratulations. I thought you weren't painting anymore.

- Thank you. - You're welcome.

It's an old one. Not one of my best,

but it's nice to see my name still has a little value.

I can't believe it doesn't have more. I mean, you have works in museums.

Yes, my paintings still appreciate. I don't get any of that money.

So why don't you paint more?

Back when I was someone people interviewed,

they would occasionally ask me why I painted,

as if I could ever answer such a... an inane question.

How the fuck do I know why I painted?

But I do know why I stopped painting.

Why?

None of your fuckin' business.

Shit.

You stole my fucking painting!

I sold it to Brett Wysinski in Chelsea.

Wait, for how much?

Twenty thousand dollars.

You sold my painting for 20,000?

Sort of. I put my name on it. I figured you stole it from me.

I stole what from you?

My ideas. You admitted yourself that was your project.

I want some of that money.

I'm not giving you any of that money.

I sold that painting on my name, not on the quality of the work.

If it had been better, it would've sold for more.

You are a cynical bastard!

- You know that? - You don't even understand what I've done for you, do you?

Have you ever sold a painting for 20,000 dollars?

Of course I haven't.

You just did to Brett Wysinski.

He's got a good reputation. He could make or break an artist like you.

If anybody finds out I duped him, he'd look like a fool.

Your work is good. You proved it.

I suggest paying him a visit and showing him your work.

If he won't help ya, you can take your paintings to any other gallery in the city

and tell them truthfully

that your last painting sold for 20,000 dollars to Brett Wysinski.

So you're saying I should blackmail him?

It's your foot in the door. Push it open a little.

You'll see anything goes in this business.

Just do me one courtesy. Don't steal my ideas anymore.

Who is it?

It's me.

What do you want?

Open the door.

What the fuck, man?

What are we talking about?

My mother,

- who I trusted you with. - What? I got the pictures like you wanted me to.

Yeah, that's not all you got, is it?

- I don't know what you're talkin' about. - You didn't delete the pictures,

you fucking idiot!

You just put 'em in the trash. You need to delete them!

I can't believe you fucked my mother!

Oh, yeah.

It just kinda happened, okay?

I didn't go out there with the intention of doing that.

She's my mother.

I know! I know. To you, she's your mother.

But to me, she's a very sensual person.

Sensual?

She's hot, okay?

You may not see it, but she is.

I see her as a person, not as, you know, my mother like you do.

Come on, man.

Remember, we always said we wouldn't let a chick come between us, right?

Fuck you.

What about my dad?

I don't think we should tell him, do you?

What?

Look, I really like her.

I mean she's warm, nice and protective.

She really loves you.

Oh my God.

You wanted something dark, didn't you?

You wanted to explore something dark

about your relation with your mother.

- Maybe this is an opportunity for you to explore that. - Are you fucking kidding me?

No. Look, the normal person would come in here

and beat the shit out of me for fucking his mother.

But we're artists.

We don't live by the normal tenets of society.

If we did, you wouldn't have sent me up there to take those pictures.

And I wouldn't have done what I did.

We can't edit our psyches just because society says we should behave a certain way.

You know that better than anyone.

Look at those pictures,

and maybe you will find that something in yourself that you were looking for.

What would my dad say?

If the paintings are great, he'll support you.

He doesn't have to know I was involved. Nobody does.

You're an asshole.

- Come on, man. Let me buy you a drink. - No.

I... I got to walk around or something.

Okay.

- Hi. - Hey.

- Hi. I'm here for Brett Wysinski. - Yeah?

- My name is Kelsey Fricke. - Yeah, sure, one second, Kelsey.

Thank you.

Hey, yeah, Brett? Um, Kelsey Fricke is here.

Okay. Okay, cool. He'll be right down.

Hey, is... is this a Marcel Jacob?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. It's actually... it's an interesting painting.

It's from the time when he was becoming disillusioned with Dada.

- Oh, yeah. - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Yeah, you can really see that. It almost looks like constructivism.

I know. He had such a distinct voice no matter what style he used.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

I always loved the idea of Dadaism.

Like I really wanted to love it, but I don't know.

I never fell in love with it like I fell with futurism.

Oh my God. I know exactly what you mean.

Futurism, it... oh my... It's like... it's like all energy...

- Yes! - ...and, like, power.

- Yeah. - Do you know what?

It kind of has this sexy fascism thing going on.

- Do you know what I mean? It's like... - I do!

Brett. This is Kelsey Fricke. Remember?

She... she has some paperwork on the Crays painting?

- Right, yeah. - Yeah.

- Come on back to my office. - 'Kay.

So, what is this paperwork you have?

I was actually wondering if you would take a look at some of my paintings before we start.

- You're an artist. - Yes, as I said over the phone.

I'm afraid I can't help you. I only take established artists, mostly dead ones, to be honest.

Yeah, but David said that you should really take a look at my work.

Do you have paperwork or not?

No, I do. But...

So how much did you get for his painting?

Below six figures.

He said he only got 20,000.

Is that what he told you?

- Yeah. - It's not really my sort of thing.

So this paperwork you have?

Um...

This...

this is the painting you sold, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, that's from my Instagram page.

From three years ago.

When I painted it.

Wait. What?

And if you zoom in on the signature, you'll see that I painted it,

and he stole it from my apartment and replaced my signature with his.

And he got you to sell it.

- This doesn't prove anything. - But it's true.

If Norman Chazelle finds out, he's gonna be pissed.

I mean, he's the one that bought it, right?

And isn't he like a really important collector?

- Are you blackmailing me? - No.

Then what do you want?

- I just want you to look at my work. - Which I've already done.

No, what you've already sold for a low six figures.

For 25,000. I was lying.

Look, I don't want your money. I just want your help.

My help?

Selling my work.

I could maybe offer you an internship.

You'd have to dress a little more professionally,

but it's a good start in the business, answering phones, updating the website.

- You know, there's a lot to learn. - No. No way.

- I'm not doing that. - That's the best I can do.

Okay, you know what, I am blackmailing you.

If you don't help me, I will call Norman Chazelle and tell him

that he just spent 25,000 dollars

on an artist who just graduated three years ago.

Let me see that.

Is this you?

- What do you mean? - Do you dress like this every day?

Yeah.

You know, there are whole sections of the vintage clothing store

where they have clothes

that haven't been taken off the bodies of dead Iraqi soldiers, right?

I get it. You don't like the way that I dress.

You don't look like someone who's making any money.

Well, I'm not making any money. That's why I'm here.

- You're a creative person though, right? - Yeah.

And this is the best that you came up with creatively?

Yeah.

I can buy new clothes.

Julian Schnabel wears a bathrobe to dinner parties.

Yeah, but Schnabel sucks.

Schnabel sells because people want to be near him.

Because he's an interesting person.

Because he wears a bathrobe to dinner.

Because being around Schnabel makes you a better person.

It doesn't matter that you think his art sucks, because you don't matter.

Okay.

Wear something that'll make an impression.

And then we can talk about me helping you. And unfuck your hair.

Yo!

Shit.

You got a haircut.

Are you done? Great to see you.

I'll see you in there. Go have fun.

Dan, the man!

Come here, boy.

Hey, Austin. Thanks for inviting me.

You're my blood.

I need to hang out with you more so I can stay grounded.

You know, my life is just insane these days.

Austin, David Nicking wants to say hi.

I got to go. Have some drinks. These are all sponsored and shit.

Thanks for bringing me to this.

Yeah. I'm surprised he didn't invite you himself.

Why would he? He hates me.

Why?

Because he's a douchebag.

Oh, look. There's Chloe Brown.

Let's go bask in the glow of her awesome bullshit.

It's strange because both my parents are artists,

so I grew up in this artistic home.

So my work doesn't seem shocking to me.

- My gosh. - Why are you so obsessed with her?

I'm not obsessed with her.

Uh, don't ever say that.

I'm gonna go say hey to Austin.

Kelsey.

- Hey. - It's so cool you came.

Oh, thank you for inviting me. This is awesome.

Are you kidding me? You're my blood.

I need to hang out with you more so I can stay grounded.

Aw, this is all so exciting, what's happening to you.

Is that Quinn that you brought here?

Uh, yeah, why?

He... he just makes me a little nervous, that's all.

I mean, when was the last time the dude took a shower?

I mean, I don't know. He's been living in a studio, so...

Jesus.

This is where they find the... the new, young talent, so I'll be back. Give me a second.

Dan.

So nice to see you.

What are you doing here?

Gregory is looking to buy some art.

You've met my husband.

Gregory Buckland.

Dan Pierson.

I've told you about Dan.

We went to high school together. He's an artist.

His parents came to our wedding.

He did the painting of the girl in the fire.

Oh, the one in the laundry room.

It's in the laundry room?

So what are you doing here?

Austin's my friend. We went to art school together.

Oh, you're the gay one.

- Right. - What?

Gregory, can I steal you for a moment?

- Sure. Excuse me a second. - Sure.

- You told him I was gay? - Well, you were a little, right?

What are you talking about?

Remember, we did that threesome with David Conway? You sucked his cock.

I did not suck his cock!

My chin might have touched it for like a second. It was an accident.

Well, you can see how that would stay with me.

Hey, Chelsea.

Kelsey. It's Kelsey.

- Sorry. - I always thought it was Chelsea.

Nope. And we've only known each other for like five years.

Can I give you some advice?

You don't have to be such a bitch all the time.

Oh my God. Chloe, thank you so much for that advice.

But I have to be true to myself as opposed to being someone I'm not

because otherwise, I would be pretentious.

- You're calling me pretentious? - No.

I'm calling your vagina paintings pretentious and derivative.

- Of what? - Of my vagina paintings.

You can't be serious.

- Okay, they are like exact rip offs. - They look nothing like yours.

The only difference is that they're your vagina and not mine.

I'm sorry that people are more interested in my vagina paintings

than your vagina paintings.

Maybe you should've groomed a little.

Or wait, that was the point, wasn't it?

Warts and all?

They were honest.

They were gross.

Clearly, we have different relationships with our vaginas.

"Clearly, we have different relationships with our vaginas."

I just threw up in my vagina.

Why don't you paint a picture of it?

I'm sure it'll do as well as the others.

You're Quinn Donahue, aren't you?

Yes. Do I know you?

Claire Babchak.

I work for Austin.

Really? You buy his paint for him?

Actually, Austin sent me over here to throw you out.

Did he say why?

No.

I'll tell you what, I'll leave peacefully if you come with me.

I don't want to fight.

Come with me for a drink around the corner.

I'm Austin's assistant. I can't leave.

A quick drink.

He won't even notice you're gone.

And if I say no?

I'm unpredictable.

Ramon tells me that Austin won't sell me a painting.

- What? - Really?

He says it will devalue his art 'cause I'm not a respected collector.

This kind of thing happens all the time. It's purely an ego thing.

Dan, you're his friend, right?

Yeah.

Maybe you could put in a good word for Gregory.

Yeah, that would be very helpful.

Look how interesting you're turning out to be.

Okay.

Let me, um, let me go talk to him.

- Great. - A great idea.

Dude. I didn't know you were gay.

What?

It all makes sense now.

Listen to me. You know that guy, Greg Buckland?

No.

The guy, he said that you won't sell him a painting.

- Ramon's guy, yeah. - Okay.

I think that is great. Don't sell him anything. He's an asshole.

Who do you think buys art, Dan?

As long as he has money, who gives a shit if he's an asshole?

They're just gonna put it on the wall somewhere.

Okay. Charge him a fuck load for it. He'll pay it.

Everybody loves Austin.

Nobody likes him. Are you kidding?

You don't like his art?

It's just like him, superficial, loud, and kind of annoying.

It's easy to toss insults at someone when they're in the spotlight.

Maybe if you were more successful,

you wouldn't be so bitter about his success.

I knew him before he was in the spotlight. And he was always like that.

Austin works really hard.

A lot of the people in art school,

it was like they were in law school or something.

They were always talking about business plans and career planning.

Austin was one of those people.

Well, it's naive to think that you can do this these days without playing the game.

It's a business too, you know?

I didn't go to art school to study business.

I went there to get as far away from that shit as I could.

Well, thanks to our new friend, Daniel,

looks like we have ourselves a deal.

A little more than I'd like to have spent,

but, um, believe me, it was well worth it.

Now, I suggest we go back to my place

for a little celebration with some C&C.

Definitely.

Come on, Dan.

What's C&C?

Champagne and coke.

- Uh-huh. - No. I can't do that.

Kissed a girl?

- If I did that... - ...pull the car around.

Give us one second.

What the fuck is wrong with you?

What?

What about my mother?

Why do you have to make such a big deal about it?

Your mom and I just need each other right now.

May need something, but it's not you.

You think I'm not good enough for your mother?

Yeah, something like that.

Maybe you're not good enough for her. Ever think of that?

As far as mothers go, she's pretty fucking awesome.

It doesn't matter how awesome she is! She's my mother!

You can't have her.

Where have you been?

I was getting rid of your friend.

I sent you over there to throw Quinn out, not go out with him.

He's gone.

Just stay away from him, for your own good.

He's a total disaster.

Hi.

I made you some soup.

- You made soup? - Yeah.

This is so weird.

You can't say you don't know what this will do to your mom if you paint these.

I can't censor myself just because it might hurt her feelings.

It's not censoring yourself. It's called being a decent humanbeing.

I'm not a decent human being. I'm an artist.

Give her a break. She's never done anything but be good to you.

That's her soup.

She sent you.

It's her recipe.

Okay, she made it.

She just thought it would cheer you up.

Do you remember when we were 15 and I posed for you?

And I thought you were so weird.

I had never done anything like posing naked before.

I don't think that anyone had ever even seen me naked.

- I didn't think you'd do it. - Hmm.

And then your mom walked in.

And she didn't get mad or yell or anything.

She just closed the door and said, "Are you staying for dinner?"

She just wants you to be happy.

Come on.

I don't want to let her down.

I really like this one.

Want to buy it?

Yeah, okay. How much?

Four hundred bucks.

I mean, that's a discount. Obviously.

Really? Really? Listen, will you call John? Tell him I need him here, okay?

Jesus Christ, you look like you just got off the PATH train.

God, you're such a snob.

- I'm not even from Jersey. I'm from White Plains. - Oh, God. Come on.

Jesus Christ.

It's okay. Sorry.

That is Connor Fontaine, all right?

His father died a couple months ago, left a huge collection to the man.

He's like real cute.

Hmm. He is one of the most sought-after bachelors in New York.

Come on. I'll introduce you.

What? Really?

Get a grip, all right?

See if you can get through this without embarrassing us both.

Connor, there's someone I'd like you to meet. Kelsey Fricke.

Connor Fontaine.

Kelsey's a, uh, new artist, rising star.

Nice to meet you.

You showing somewhere? Maybe I've seen your work?

No, I... I doubt it.

I'm taking her on, for myself.

- That's not like you, Brett. - No. It isn't.

Well, either you've got something on him or...

or you're something special.

- Kelsey, where do you live? - Uh, in Bushwick.

She's really a rags to riches story.

Yeah, my dad worked in a mine.

I guess you could say he got shafted.

Shut your drunken mouth.

Kelsey doesn't need some rich, little shit making fun of her family.

You think it's her fault she was poor?

- Well, I didn't mean anything. - No, it's okay.

No, no, no, no, no, it's not okay.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to be an artist in this world?

Even with money, it's fucking impossible.

I think you must be really, really talented to have made it this far.

I have nothing but respect for you.

Thank you.

I love this one.

Has anyone seen these?

Like who?

People who might buy them.

Not really.

Do you have pictures of these like on your site?

I don't have a site.

But I have pictures of them I can send you.

I know a buyer who would love these.

Anthony Burkhart.

He loves taking new artists and introducing them to the world.

He's been trying to get Austin to paint a mural in his apartment.

I could convince him that you should do it.

How would you do that?

I'd tell him that you're talented.

He listens to me.

I'd love to do a mural.

I'll see what I can do.

I could be your agent.

What about Austin?

Austin's career is doing just fine.

Well, I really admire people who know what they want out of life.

- Right. - Well, I'm 27, and I have no idea what I want to do.

I mean, you like art, right? You never thought about being an artist or...

Oh, no, no. I'm not a creative person. No.

I get my demons out on a couch, not on a canvas.

Yeah, you don't really seem like the type of person with problems at all.

- Yeah? - Mm-hmm.

Well, I do.

Yeah.

My... my dad was always on top of me.

He was a control freak.

One day, I was 11 years old, I was in my room.

And, um, I was jerking off.

And my dad came in, and he caught me.

So I stopped with my hand frozen in place.

And he... he came over to me with that stern, stoic look on his face.

And he grabbed my little cock,

and he yanked on it.

Hard.

And he said, "Grab it like you mean it, boy.

Don't be such a fruitcake about it, or you'll be here all day."

He didn't say that.

True story.

I never told anybody that before.

Yeah, parents fuck you up, that's for sure.

- Hey, I'm sorry. - No, I'm... I'm glad you came in. Come in. Lock the door.

I'll just...

Sorry, I... I don't normally do all this. Uh, it's just, uh,

it's been a tough time lately.

No, no, I get it. I mean, I don't know what I would do if my parents died.

You're really easy to talk to, you know?

I love that.

Kind of feels like I've known you forever.

- Like we're childhood friends, you know? - Yeah.

Hey, man. I thought you ghosted. Oh, hey, check this out.

- Can I talk to you for a minute? - Um...

Yeah, sure, Dad.

- What's going on? I was hungry. - This isn't working out.

- What? Why? What did I do? - You just sucked him off in the bathroom, didn't you?

- Did he just tell you that? - He didn't need to tell me it. You... you did though, right?

So?

I'm trying to introduce you to the world as a serious artist not as a fucking cheap date.

- It's not like I slept with him. - That's not the point!

Did you tell him how Ruskin and Calvert influenced your art

while you were unzipping his pants?

- No. - Did you mention your admiration for Anna Blunden

while you were fondling his balls?

No?

Or even that you find futurism sexy? Did you tell him that?

It's...

I see all of it in your work, but I'm not hearing you talk about it.

Because it wasn't that kind of conversation.

If you can't talk about your art with Connor Fontaine,

then who the fuck are you gonna talk about it with?

He was raised in a museum. Jesus Christ.

He had a De Kooning in his bedroom growing up.

Listen, he's going through a lot right now.

He's a fucked up rich kid with a lump on his dick.

Yeah. That's right.

I sucked him off, too. At least I knew what I was getting out of it.

Okay, you know what? You don't understand.

Guys like that,

they don't like girls like me.

And I don't understand how someone as talented as you are could have such low self-esteem.

You got to get a fucking grip.

Hey, we didn't know if you were coming back or not, so we let them take your plate.

It's okay.

Is everything all right?

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yes.

Yeah, we're g... we're going to a club after this. You want to come?

I... No, I should probably go home. I have work in the morning.

- We got to go. - Mm.

- Hey, come on. - Mm.

It's a new painting.

Actually, your friend Quinn, painted that.

He gave it to you?

I bought it. I love it.

You gave him money?

You know, uh, I've got an old friend at Bank of America.

He said he'd take a look at your art for a new building they're opening up.

What... what... what does that even mean?

- How can you not understand that? - I am talking to Dad.

Dad, you were saying?

My friend, Jeffrey Bush, we were talking about our kids.

I told him how you went to art school, how you're trying to be an artist.

He said he'd take a look at your work.

They... they don't want my paintings. They want pictures of puppy dogs.

I thought you said you work isn't dark.

I said my work wasn't dark enough.

Besides, I'm against everything that Bank of America stands for.

So it's okay to deposit your checks there,

but not okay to sell them one of your paintings?

You always have to hold money over my head, don't you?

- Well, if you don't like it, why don't you get a job? - I have a job.

I'm an artist.

Just 'cause it doesn't pay me money doesn't mean it's not a job.

That's exactly what it means.

What is going on between you two?

My whole life I've looked up to you for moral guidance.

Turns out, you're just a bunch of hypocrites.

- It... am I missing something here? - I don't...

You know, for an artist, you're pretty judgmental, especially about infidelity.

- I'm married. - Yeah.

I don't know what you're doing with that fucking guy. He's a fucking joke.

He's nice. He's handsome.

- He's rich. - Yeah, he's successful.

He's 50 fucking years old. You don't think I'll be successful by the time I'm 50?

Okay, well, maybe I didn't want to have to wait that long.

And we've been going out since the 10th grade,

and you still haven't really sold anything.

That's not how it works.

- That's how it worked for Austin Gamby. - Yeah.

Speaking of high school, do you remember that girl Britney Conner?

She used to tell people she was related to Peggy from Mad Men.

Yeah.

We had English together in 9th grade.

We made out at the '90s dance.

Okay. Well, I'm not gonna ask about that

because we were definitely going out then.

But apparently, she's a total junkie now.

She lives somewhere near here.

She stole like 2,000 dollars' worth of jewelry from her mom.

Really?

I always thought she was cool.

Being a junkie isn't cool.

That's just your silly idea from watching Trainspotting.

What do you know about it?

Okay.

Why don't you call Britney Conner and see if she can help you be more dark?

Maybe she'll let you be a junkie with her.

- Maybe I'll do that. - Good.

But just do me a favor.

If you fuck her, wear a condom, because I don't want to get AIDS.

Hey.

Remember that buyer I was telling you about, Tony Burkhart?

Yeah.

Well, he loves your work.

We have a meeting with Tony and his wife, Lena,

at their apartment on Thursday.

Meeting for what?

I told you, they want someone to paint a mural for their apartment.

And they want me?

They want to meet with you.

And they're not talking to anyone else right now.

Listen.

The Burkharts are two of the most influential buyers in the city.

Everyone's going to want you once you get this job.

That's so awesome that you're an artist.

Yeah. Doing what you love.

I'm still trying to sell something, it's like...

You go out into the world, and nobody gives a shit.

Right?

Nobody gives a shit about anyone.

That... that's why I got married.

Can you fucking believe it?

We were so fucking high, so we got married.

It was in a church, too, because Breck was a choirboy.

He was raped and abused as a child.

But he's really smart and talented.

He's been looking for a job.

But it's been tough.

What does Breck do?

I don't know. But you know what, Dan?

It's been really nice to see you and all.

But, you know,

do you have any money?

- That's what I, uh, I wanted to see you... - Wait a minute.

I remember you now. Dan.

You're the preppy guy I made out with at the dance.

Yep. That was me.

You tried to finger me, and I wouldn't let you.

No, I didn't.

Are you sure?

Yes.

Well, it was somebody.

Guys!

This is Dan.

He wants to buy us some drugs.

You fucked him?

N... no.

I offered, but he wants to do drugs with us.

What type of drugs do you think we do?

I was thinking maybe some heroin.

Wait! Leslie!

- Where you going? - Home. This was a bad idea.

Don't say that. I'm glad you came.

Oh, why? So I could see you with your tongue down some girl's throat?

My tongue? No. She... she was just looking over some paintings.

Oh, give me a break. I saw you.

It's true. She gave me a kiss of goodbye, but it wasn't like tongue.

It might have looked like tongue.

- Do you have your contacts in? - I don't wear contacts.

- I've seen you with glasses. - I wear reading glasses.

What's in the box?

Cookies.

I made cookies for you.

Now I feel really stupid.

- What the fuck am I doing here? - No.

Don't feel stupid.

I love cookies. Don't be like that.

You're so beautiful.

Come on.

Leslie.

Aw.

"Dare to dream."

Yeah, except they don't want you to dream.

They want you to sleep

because if you're asleep and dreaming, you just can't do anything.

So yeah, dare to live your life, dreaming about the life that you could've had.

But once you realize that all your stupid little dreams aren't coming true,

life is gonna suck for you.

So, dare to do that.

It's supposed to be inspirational.

Well, the kitten's never gonna catch the piece of yarn.

Hello?

Hello, everyone.

And you are?

- Dan. - Dan.

You look like a nice suburban white boy.

Smells like Ivory soap in here.

It's not something I'm used to smelling at this address.

Well, I find myself in a desperate room.

Dan.

Tell me about yourself.

I'm an artist.

What medium?

I'm a painter.

A painter? That's a noble profession.

- You ever dipped in dab before? - What is that?

Yeah, I thought so.

All right.

I'm gonna set you up with the pearl.

But Dan can only do half 'cause this is good shit.

And we don't want him dying.

Okay? Good.

That'll fix you up.

But I'm gonna need 500 bucks.

Is that okay with you, Dan?

Because I assume you're the one who's treating?

Now, Dan,

I would like you to come over here

and suck my cock.

- What? - I want you to get on your knees and suck it.

I... I don't...

It's not that big of a deal.

All these other guys have sucked my cock.

The question is how bad do you want it?

I already know their answer.

Come on, we've all done it. Freddy's done it a bunch.

Yeah, come on, Dan. You could look at me while you do it.

Come on. Suck him off. Let's get this party started. I'm fuckin' dying.

It's down to you, Dan.

I'm gonna get out of here now.

If you go and take this money, then we don't have a deal.

Dutch, that's not fair.

Yeah, what the fuck, Dutch? I'll suck you off. You can fuck me in the ass if you want.

Yeah, fuck her in the ass.

A deal's a deal.

I'm sorry I let you guys down.

You know what?

I think I can keep the money.

But I suggest you leave.

This place is gonna get very dark in the next few hours.

I don't think it's something you want to see.

- I don't know why. I guess he likes you. - But he asked me out.

It's not a date, all right?

This is what artists do. They have dinner with potential buyers.

Okay.

Yeah, but what do I wear?

Oh my God.

I just had lunch with Anthony Burkhart.

He told me that you said that I wasn't interested in doing the mural for him.

Tony wanted someone new.

I introduced you. You didn't think this would get back to me?

And Quinn, y... you're gonna sell him Quinn?

He's talented.

He's talented at fucking things up.

He's talented at fucking women.

Apparently, he's fucked you.

I think it might be better for the both of us if I stop working here.

So do you know Herbert Draper?

- Uh, British, Victorian, right? - Yeah.

I really loved his work, and all the paintings that I've been doing recently

are really influenced by him.

Do you know Wilfrid Moser?

- Uh, yeah, yeah. He's, uh, he's Swiss. Abstract. - Yeah.

Yeah, I saw a, uh, retrospective of his in Barton.

Is this a test?

Can we not have an art history quiz?

I was just thinking that you... you've never seen my work, so how do you know if it's good?

Well, Brett says it's good.

Yeah, but that's Brett's job.

Well, Brett's good at his job.

I want to talk about you.

Yeah, it's not my favorite subject.

- Really? - Yeah.

Well, most artists love to talk about themselves.

Yeah, I know. I hate it.

I was actually hoping you'd take me to your studio and show me some of your work.

My studio is my bedroom.

Even better.

- Brett said that... - Oh, will you forget about Brett?

- Uh, yeah. I'm... I'm trying to. - Okay.

No, no, no, no, I'll put this on the company.

I mean, we're talking business, right?

Are we though?

Welcome.

Ugh.

Done.

'Kay.

Hold on, I need to take it. Hello?

Hey, I've been texting you. How'd it go?

It actually... it went really well.

He's, um, he's actually... he's actually here.

He's what?

Yeah, he came by to see the studio.

Right.

- Which is your bedroom. - Yeah, but, um...

it's... it's... it's not like I was gonna do anything.

Then what the fuck is he doing there?

Listen to me, all right, it's really simple.

You want to sell him something? You want to date him? You can't do both.

I'm... I want to sell him something.

Good. 'Cause he's fucking awful at dating. All right?

But he's really good at buying paintings.

I got it.

What's up?

Well, I think... I think I'm just gonna walk you out.

Seriously?

Yeah.

You'll call me tomorrow?

Yeah, I'll, uh, I'll call Brett.

I just have to come to terms that I'm not good at this.

I mean, even if my art is good, which I still don't know if it is,

I am so bad at all this other shit,

like all of the schmoozing and the pretending that I have this ego

and figuring out what to put on my Instagram.

That stuff isn't important.

Yes, it is.

And I... I don't know what to do

because I cannot keep working these shitty jobs for the rest of my life.

Okay, what is going on with you two?

I don't know what his problem is.

- You have to go talk to him. This is crazy. - He won't talk to me.

All right, I'm doing it for you.

Yo.

Quinn says he's sorry.

Fuck him. I'm sick of him.

Come on. He's your best friend.

He's the worst friend ever. He is totally unreliable.

What happened?

He said that you're not a good friend because you're not reliable.

You don't pick your friends because they're reliable, do you?

What are we, accountants?

He said we don't pick our friends because they're reliable. We're not accountants.

He's just using this whole bohemian act as an excuse to be a total fucking asshole.

Like he always does.

He's not buying that.

Tell him that he's living in the past.

He still has his high school girlfriend,

and he'll never move on in life until he breaks up with her

and stops taking money from his parents.

Oh, he's not gonna like that.

He needs to hear it.

He said you need to break up with your girlfriend 'cause he's... she's bringing you down.

You tell him just because he's fucking my mother

doesn't mean he knows anything about my life.

He said something about you fucking his mother?

Tell him we broke up.

- You broke up with his mother? - Just tell him.

He said that they broke up.

Yeah?

Yeah.

He said he couldn't let it get in the way of your friendship.

He said that?

His words.

Fuck it. I'm over it anyway.

I'm done with the whole mother thing.

It was dumb, the whole idea.

What happened?

I just can't deal with it anymore.

You always do this. You get so close, and then you give up.

Like you're scared of actually doing something great.

Your mom thinks it's because you never worked.

You never worked.

I didn't say I agreed with her.

I'm just saying that those paintings were a great idea. And I know you.

I know you even better now that I dated your mom.

You have to finish those paintings.

I don't think I can.

What the fuck is wrong with you? And you too, Kelsey.

- What about me? - Who said this shit was easy?

You guys can't just give up being artists because you had a bad day.

So you haven't sold anything.

Van Gogh sold one painting his entire life.

That's one more than I have.

And he killed himself. I'm not even dark enough to kill myself.

Quinn!

Shit.

You son of a bitch.

- What did I do? - Claire.

That's what you did.

- I didn't know she was your girlfriend. - Like fuck you didn't!

Are you really mad at me about Claire?

What else?

What about that blur effect you stole from me?

Remember that? You know what I'm talking about.

Tell me. What I never understood is you stole it from me.

So why were you always mad at me for doing... Ow! Ooh!

- Oh! - You were never gonna make a fucking dime!

Now get this asshole off of me. Bruising my integrity!

- Ow! - Oh!

- I'm sorry. - You fuck!

- Chill, chill! Chill! - Hey, hey, hey, hey! Break it up.

I didn't fucking mean it! Jesus.

He's not really mad about any of that stuff.

He's mad about this one time in school when we got drunk and fooled around.

You and Austin?

Yeah. We were just drunk or something, and it happened.

It wasn't a big deal, or I didn't think it was.

But then he wanted it to keep going. And I'm not gay.

Well, Austin's not gay either.

Who knows, man?

He had a girlfriend back then. Pretty one, too.

Yeah, Jackie Hernandez.

You messed around with her, too.

- How'd you know about that? - I thought everybody knew about that.

- You make it sound like I'm an asshole or something. - I'm not.

He started getting mean with me.

The point is I can paint circles around that guy.

He thinks because he's got a fucking gallery behind him

that he's Francis fucking Bacon. He's a fucking hack!

- He's really not that bad. - Oh, fuck him!

I'm going back to my studio.

I'm gonna paint some shit that he won't even understand.

This place is a mess.

I've been having a rough time.

What is this?

That's what I've been working on, some nudes of my mother.

- Jesus. That's not you, is it? - No.

Look, man, I know you... you... you've been going through some stuff, you know.

But you're... you're putting it into the work.

That's... that's a w... I haven't even figured out how to do that yet.

"Dare to dream."

I love this.

Uh, I'm... still... I'm... figuring 'em out still.

I... I got to show these to Charles when you're done.

- You would do that? - Yeah, man.

You th... you think he would hang them?

It's a little dark for him.

But I think that he could make a big deal about this.

Really?

It's dark?

How much longer is this gonna take?

Claire, look, we like the artist.

But we set aside a lot of stuff for this today.

I am so sorry, Tony. Um, he says he's on his way.

Where the fuck have you been?

We were supposed to be at the Burkharts' four hours ago.

- Oh. Yeah, what time is it? - I was there.

I kept calling you.

Fuck!

- I could come now. - It's too late. You fucked it up!

Seriously? I'm just a little late.

It took me two weeks to get them to agree to talk to you.

You think you're the only fucking artist in the city that wants to work with them?

They work with artists, right? I mean, they know how we are.

- We show up late. - What the fuck is wrong with you?

Look, I don't know what year you're living in,

but artists work for a living these days.

And they work really fucking hard if they want to make any money at it.

Yeah, I work hard at it. I was working all night!

You have to see these paintings I'm doing. I did some really cool stuff.

You don't like them.

No, I don't like them. How could that surprise you?

Maybe I finally did some work that scares you.

Is that what you're trying to do?

You always said that you liked my work, so...

I always said I liked your work.

You didn't?

Why...- why would you lie about that?

Because I love you. Because I'm your mother.

You wanted me to be an artist.

I wanted you to be happy.

You were always such a sad kid.

And then you took that art class in Mrs. Kudacoppen's sixth grade class,

and it made you seem a little less unhappy. So yes, I encouraged you.

You lied to me my whole life?

You said that you liked my work!

I always thought you'd get better.

Nobody wanted you to get better more than I did.

You never thought any of it was any good?

It just seemed like you were trying too hard.

Why didn't you tell me the truth

and save me from the humiliation and torture that I put myself through to be good at this?

You have your whole life to let the world beat you down.

Why do you need to hear that from me?

I'm sorry I wasn't good enough for you.

- Has your father seen these? - No.

That's good. 'Cause I honestly don't think he'd like them either.

Mom, these are going up in a few weeks at the Reynolds Gallery.

They love them. Austin Gamby's presenting it.

It's gonna be a big deal.

Well, I wanted you to meet the artist, he's Dan Pierson.

Austin. Can I show you something over here for a minute?

Wow.

I mean, I knew they were nudes, but I...

Yeah. Do you like 'em?

I think they're really good.

Provocative, obviously. I mean, you wanted them to be dark, right?

Mom w... didn't warn you or anything?

No.

No, it... it's better this way.

I just wish I could see them like you weren't my son and she wasn't my wife.

Well, I hope they sell.

They got sex in 'em. It's always good, right?

You're Dan's friend, right?

- Yeah. Hi. Quinn. - Hi. I'm his father.

I know. We met once at Pratt.

Mm. You're the one who, uh, took the pictures, right? Of my wife?

- No. - No?

I mean, did they tell you that?

Yeah.

Oh.

- Yeah. - Hmm.

Guess I did.

What do you, uh, what do you think of the paintings?

Sorry.

- It's okay. - I mean, the paintings are good.

I don't know. I'm still trying to process this.

That's good.

Maybe it'll give you a new way of looking at her.

I mean, she looks great in them.

Huh.

Can I buy you a drink?

It's free.

You didn't tell him anything.

What was I going to do? I... I couldn't do it.

I told him your friend came up,

we did the pictures, and that was it.

I guess I could've made it all up, right?

You probably could've, yeah.

But I'm glad you didn't.

Hey. What are you doing here?

Well, this is the place to be.

Uh, have you seen Brett?

No, is he here?

Yeah. Yeah, we came here together from his gallery.

I just bought your painting.

- Wait, you just bought one? - Yeah.

You know, honestly, I didn't think it would live up

to whatever I'd imagined it to be.

But Brett was right. I love it.

- I'm gonna put it next to my Vrubel. - Really?

- Yeah. - Oh, that's awesome.

Yeah, you should come and check on it some time.

Yeah, I would like that.

Hey, sweetie.

Oh, Chloe. Uh, do you know Kelsey Fricke?

- Of course, we were in school together. - You never mentioned that.

No, why would I?

Hey, Chloe.

We're engaged.

Did he tell you?

- As it's been a bit of a... - No.

...whirlwind.

Uh, just...

- Wait, wait, Kelsey, what's wrong? - Are you serious?

I mean, Chloe Brown?

I've expected a model or an architect, anybody except her fucking vagina.

Her vagina?

But I... I think her vagina's okay.

- Is there something I don't know? - No!

That's exactly it, there's nothing that you don't know about it.

It's exactly what you'd expect it to be.

Look, Kelsey, I don't really understand what you're talking about,

but I... I don't really want my vaginas to be complicated.

Not like my art.

Hey.

I tell you the news?

- Yeah. - He bought it.

Charles just sold the last painting.

- Are you kidding me? - No.

He wanted to tell you himself, but he's still working out the deal.

Holy shit.

I think I see Ramon over at the bar.

You go. I'll go find Dan.

Great.

This is such a big deal.

Look how much attention you're getting.

- They all sold. - Oh my God, that's amazing.

I'm so excited for you.

Yeah?

Of course. I love you.

I love you, too.

Mm, wait. Greg will see us.

He did see us.

Ugh!

Come on, babe. Let's get out of here.

This place is full of freaks.

Ow.

Oh shit.

Are you okay?

I told you to dump her.

Oh, man, that's gonna bruise.

- You good? - Yeah, I'm good, man.

Kelsey, I heard you sold a painting.

You heard that?

Word gets around.

Come on, let's go get a drink.

Hmm.

Yeah, it's okay.

I'll catch up with you guys.

You sure?

Yeah. It's cool.

Dude, can I borrow that?

Sure, man. What you got?

I'm trying to see what he's making.

Hey, dawg. Take this from me, put this money for me in my... on her hands.

Nice and clean.

Look how fast he's doing this though. That's crazy.

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