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Subtitles downloaded from Podnapisi.NET
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00:00:23,837 --> 00:00:25,464
So stay with us
because later this afternoon,
3
00:00:25,538 --> 00:00:28,473
we're lucky enough
to be talking to Anna Scott,
4
00:00:28,541 --> 00:00:30,475
Hollywood's biggest star by far.
5
00:00:30,710 --> 00:00:33,804
Miss Scott's latest film is
once again topping the charts.
6
00:02:26,244 --> 00:02:28,502
Of course I've seen her films...
7
00:02:28,579 --> 00:02:30,979
and always thought
she was, well, fabulous.
8
00:02:31,049 --> 00:02:33,984
But, you know, a million, million miles
from the world I live in...
9
00:02:34,052 --> 00:02:38,716
which is here, Notting Hill,
my favorite bit of London.
10
00:02:38,790 --> 00:02:42,886
There's the market on weekdays selling
every fruit and vegetable known to man.
11
00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:46,123
Rock hard bananas,
five for a pound!
12
00:02:46,197 --> 00:02:48,961
The tattoo parlor
with a guy outside who got drunk...
13
00:02:49,033 --> 00:02:52,491
and now can't remember
why he chose "I love Ken."
14
00:02:52,570 --> 00:02:56,973
The radical hairdressers where everyone
comes out looking like the Cookie Monster,
15
00:02:57,041 --> 00:02:59,271
whether they want to or not.
16
00:02:59,343 --> 00:03:01,436
And then, suddenly,
it's the weekend,
17
00:03:01,512 --> 00:03:04,208
and from break of day hundreds
of stalls appear out of nowhere,
18
00:03:04,282 --> 00:03:06,944
filling Portobello Road,
right up to Notting Hill Gate.
19
00:03:07,018 --> 00:03:10,579
And wherever you look thousands of
people are buying millions of antiques,
20
00:03:10,655 --> 00:03:15,820
some genuine and some...
not quite so genuine.
21
00:03:15,893 --> 00:03:19,590
And what's great is that lots of friends
have ended up in this part of London.
22
00:03:19,664 --> 00:03:23,191
That's Tony, for example,
architect turned chef,
23
00:03:23,267 --> 00:03:26,703
who recently invested all the money
he ever earned in a new restaurant.
24
00:03:26,771 --> 00:03:29,934
And so, this is where
I spend my days and years...
25
00:03:30,007 --> 00:03:33,841
in this small village in the middle of
the city in a house with a blue door...
26
00:03:33,911 --> 00:03:37,369
that my wife and I bought together
before she left me for a man...
27
00:03:37,448 --> 00:03:40,042
who looked exactly like Harrison Ford.
28
00:03:40,118 --> 00:03:43,087
And where I lead a strange half-life
with a lodger called-
29
00:03:43,154 --> 00:03:45,088
Spike!
30
00:03:48,926 --> 00:03:53,295
You couldn't help me with an incredible
important decision, could you?
31
00:03:53,364 --> 00:03:57,391
Is this important in comparison to, let's say,
whether they should cancel Third World debt?
32
00:03:57,468 --> 00:04:00,596
That's right. I am at last going out
on a date with the great Janine,
33
00:04:00,671 --> 00:04:02,969
and I just wanna be sure
I've picked the right T-shirt.
34
00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:05,975
- What are the choices?
- Well, wait for it.
35
00:04:13,317 --> 00:04:16,669
First there's this one.
Cool, huh?
36
00:04:16,803 --> 00:04:21,137
Yeah, it might make it hard
to strike a really romantic note.
37
00:04:21,207 --> 00:04:23,141
Point taken.
Don't despair.
38
00:04:23,209 --> 00:04:26,940
If it's romance we're looking for,
I believe I have just the thing.
39
00:04:31,150 --> 00:04:35,086
Yeah, well, there again, she might not
think you had true love on your mind.
40
00:04:35,154 --> 00:04:38,180
Right.
Just one more.
41
00:04:43,830 --> 00:04:46,321
True love here I come.
42
00:04:51,371 --> 00:04:55,774
Well, yeah. Yeah, that's-
that's, um, perfect.
43
00:04:55,842 --> 00:04:58,834
Great. Thanks.
44
00:04:58,911 --> 00:05:02,210
- Wish me luck.
- Good luck.
45
00:05:07,587 --> 00:05:10,181
And so it was
just another hopeless Wednesday,
46
00:05:10,256 --> 00:05:13,020
as I walked the thousand yards
through the market to work,
47
00:05:13,092 --> 00:05:17,620
never suspecting that this was the day
that was gonna change my life forever.
48
00:05:17,697 --> 00:05:21,155
This is work, by the way,
my little travel bookshop,
49
00:05:22,268 --> 00:05:25,328
- Morning, Martin.
- Morning, Monsignor.
50
00:05:25,405 --> 00:05:28,431
which, um, well, sells travel books,
51
00:05:28,508 --> 00:05:31,875
and to be frank with you,
doesn't always sell many of those.
52
00:05:35,548 --> 00:05:39,109
Classic.
Profit from major sales push,
53
00:05:39,185 --> 00:05:42,279
minus 347 pound.
54
00:05:43,856 --> 00:05:47,485
Shall I, uh,
go and get you a cappuccino?
55
00:05:47,560 --> 00:05:50,552
- You know, ease the pain a bit.
- Yeah, yeah.
56
00:05:50,630 --> 00:05:53,724
Better make it a half.
All I can afford.
57
00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:58,635
Get your logic.
Demi-cappu coming right up.
58
00:06:22,829 --> 00:06:25,229
Um, can I help you at all?
59
00:06:26,632 --> 00:06:29,931
No, thanks.
I'll just... look around.
60
00:06:31,003 --> 00:06:33,836
Fine.
61
00:06:39,278 --> 00:06:42,509
Uh, that book's really not great.
62
00:06:42,582 --> 00:06:46,609
Just in case, you know, browsing turned
to buying. You'd be wasting your money.
63
00:06:46,686 --> 00:06:49,177
But if it's Turkey
you're interested in,
64
00:06:49,255 --> 00:06:52,281
um, this one, on the other hand,
is very good.
65
00:06:52,358 --> 00:06:56,590
Um, I think the man who wrote it has
actually been to Turkey, which helps.
66
00:06:56,662 --> 00:07:00,564
Um, there's also
a very amusing incident with a kebab,
67
00:07:00,633 --> 00:07:03,397
um, which is one
of many amusing incidents.
68
00:07:03,469 --> 00:07:05,437
Thanks.
I'll think about it.
69
00:07:05,505 --> 00:07:08,030
Or, in the bigger hardback variety,
there's-
70
00:07:08,107 --> 00:07:12,168
I'm sorry.
Can you just give me a second?
71
00:07:15,314 --> 00:07:17,544
Excuse me.
72
00:07:17,617 --> 00:07:19,642
- Yes?
- Bad news.
73
00:07:19,719 --> 00:07:21,152
What?
74
00:07:21,220 --> 00:07:24,815
We've got a security camera
in this bit of the shop.
75
00:07:24,891 --> 00:07:26,153
So?
76
00:07:26,225 --> 00:07:28,955
So I saw you put that book
down your trousers.
77
00:07:30,329 --> 00:07:34,561
- What book?
- The one down your trousers.
78
00:07:34,634 --> 00:07:37,228
I don't have a book
down my trousers.
79
00:07:37,303 --> 00:07:39,271
Right.
80
00:07:39,338 --> 00:07:41,636
I tell you what.
Um, I'll call the police, and, um,
81
00:07:41,707 --> 00:07:45,541
if I'm wrong about the whole
"book down the trousers" scenario,
82
00:07:45,611 --> 00:07:47,044
I really apologize.
83
00:07:47,113 --> 00:07:52,483
Okay. What if... I did
have a book down my trousers?
84
00:07:52,552 --> 00:07:55,419
Well, ideally,
when I went back to the desk,
85
00:07:55,488 --> 00:08:00,585
you'd remove the Cadogan Guide
to Bali from your trousers...
86
00:08:00,660 --> 00:08:03,857
and either wipe it
and put it back or buy it.
87
00:08:03,930 --> 00:08:06,330
I'll see you in a sec.
88
00:08:06,399 --> 00:08:08,867
I'm sorry about that.
89
00:08:08,935 --> 00:08:11,460
No, it's fine.
90
00:08:11,537 --> 00:08:15,439
I was gonna steal one,
but now I've changed my mind.
91
00:08:15,508 --> 00:08:18,443
Oh, signed by the author,
I see.
92
00:08:18,511 --> 00:08:20,843
Um, yeah, couldn't stop him.
93
00:08:20,913 --> 00:08:23,814
If you can find an unsigned one,
it's worth an absolute fortune.
94
00:08:23,883 --> 00:08:26,875
Excuse me.
95
00:08:26,953 --> 00:08:28,978
- Yes?
- Can I have your autograph?
96
00:08:29,055 --> 00:08:31,523
Uh, sure.
97
00:08:31,591 --> 00:08:33,718
- Uh-
- Here.
98
00:08:33,793 --> 00:08:37,285
- What's your name?
- Rufus.
99
00:08:42,034 --> 00:08:44,025
What does it say?
100
00:08:44,103 --> 00:08:49,166
That's my signature. And above it, it
says, "Dear Rufus, you belong in jail."
101
00:08:49,242 --> 00:08:51,335
Good one.
102
00:08:53,079 --> 00:08:56,640
- Do you want my phone number?
- Tempting.
103
00:08:56,716 --> 00:08:59,549
But... no.
Thank you.
104
00:09:03,422 --> 00:09:06,323
I will take this one.
105
00:09:06,392 --> 00:09:08,860
Oh, right, right.
So, uh-
106
00:09:08,928 --> 00:09:12,989
Well, on second thoughts,
um, maybe it's not that bad after all.
107
00:09:13,065 --> 00:09:15,966
Actually, it's a sort
of a classic, really.
108
00:09:16,035 --> 00:09:19,596
None of those childish kebab stories
you find in so many books these days.
109
00:09:19,672 --> 00:09:21,606
And, um, I tell you what.
110
00:09:21,674 --> 00:09:23,665
I'll throw in
one of those for free.
111
00:09:23,743 --> 00:09:26,268
Useful for, uh, lighting fires,
112
00:09:26,345 --> 00:09:29,280
wrapping fish,
that sort of thing.
113
00:09:32,184 --> 00:09:34,675
- Thanks.
- Pleasure.
114
00:10:05,851 --> 00:10:10,220
Cappuccino, as ordered.
115
00:10:10,289 --> 00:10:12,314
Thanks.
116
00:10:12,391 --> 00:10:15,485
I don't think you'll believe
who was just in here.
117
00:10:15,561 --> 00:10:18,428
Who?
Was it someone famous?
118
00:10:19,832 --> 00:10:21,925
- No, no, no.
- No?
119
00:10:22,001 --> 00:10:26,529
Would be exciting, though, wouldn't it,
if someone famous came into the shop? Hmm?
120
00:10:26,606 --> 00:10:30,565
Do you know-
and this is pretty amazing, actually-
121
00:10:30,643 --> 00:10:32,907
but I once saw Ringo Starr.
122
00:10:32,979 --> 00:10:35,277
- Where was that?
- Kensington High Street.
123
00:10:35,348 --> 00:10:37,282
At least I think it was Ringo.
124
00:10:37,350 --> 00:10:40,080
It might have been that man
from Fiddler on the Roof.
125
00:10:40,152 --> 00:10:42,814
- You know, Toppy.
- Topol.
126
00:10:42,888 --> 00:10:45,584
Yes, that's right.
Topol.
127
00:10:45,658 --> 00:10:47,592
Mm-hmm.
128
00:10:47,660 --> 00:10:51,528
Actually, Ringo Starr doesn't-
doesn't look at all like, uh, Topol.
129
00:10:51,597 --> 00:10:54,691
Yeah, but he was-
he was quite a long way away from me.
130
00:10:54,767 --> 00:10:57,861
So actually it could've
been neither of them.
131
00:10:57,937 --> 00:11:00,804
Yes, I suppose so, yes.
132
00:11:00,873 --> 00:11:05,276
- It's not a classic anecdote, is it?
- Not a classic, no. No.
133
00:11:09,081 --> 00:11:13,518
- Another one?
- Yes. No.
134
00:11:13,586 --> 00:11:17,044
Let's go crazy.
I'll have an orange juice.
135
00:11:22,595 --> 00:11:25,393
- Okay, thanks. Bye-bye.
- See you later.
136
00:11:32,304 --> 00:11:34,329
- Oh!
- Oh! Shit!
137
00:11:34,407 --> 00:11:37,399
- Oh, my God!
- Bugger! I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
138
00:11:37,476 --> 00:11:40,343
- Here. Let me-
- Get your hands off!
139
00:11:40,413 --> 00:11:43,211
I'm really sorry.
I- I live just over the street.
140
00:11:43,282 --> 00:11:46,513
I have, um, water and soap.
You can get cleaned up.
141
00:11:46,585 --> 00:11:48,815
No, thank you.
I just need to get my car back.
142
00:11:48,888 --> 00:11:52,221
I also have a phone.
I'm confident that in five minutes...
143
00:11:52,291 --> 00:11:55,260
we could have you spick-and-span
and back on the street again.
144
00:11:55,327 --> 00:11:58,057
In the non-prostitute sense,
obviously.
145
00:12:01,167 --> 00:12:04,364
All right. Well- What do you mean,
"just over the street"?
146
00:12:04,437 --> 00:12:08,156
- Give it to me in yards.
- Uh, 18 yards.
147
00:12:08,230 --> 00:12:11,461
That's my house there
with the blue front door.
148
00:12:14,403 --> 00:12:17,634
Come on in.
I'll just- I'll just-
149
00:12:20,743 --> 00:12:25,840
Um, right. Right.
Come in.
150
00:12:25,915 --> 00:12:29,316
It's, um, not quite as tidy
as it normally is, I fear.
151
00:12:29,385 --> 00:12:32,548
But, um-
The bathroom's on the top floor.
152
00:12:32,621 --> 00:12:36,489
And the telephone's just-
just up here.
153
00:12:38,060 --> 00:12:40,392
Here.
Let- Let me, um-
154
00:12:46,201 --> 00:12:49,637
Um, round the corner.
Straight on- straight on up.
155
00:12:53,442 --> 00:12:55,376
Bugger.
156
00:13:00,316 --> 00:13:02,181
Uh-oh.
157
00:13:15,030 --> 00:13:16,930
Uh,
158
00:13:16,999 --> 00:13:20,196
would you like a cup of tea
before you go?
159
00:13:20,269 --> 00:13:22,635
- No.
- Coffee?
160
00:13:22,705 --> 00:13:25,469
- No.
- Orange juice?
161
00:13:26,609 --> 00:13:31,069
Probably not.
Um, something else cold.
162
00:13:31,146 --> 00:13:33,080
Uh-
163
00:13:33,148 --> 00:13:37,278
Coke? Water?
164
00:13:37,353 --> 00:13:39,287
Some disgusting sugary drink...
165
00:13:39,355 --> 00:13:41,448
pretending to have something to do
with fruits of the forest?
166
00:13:41,523 --> 00:13:44,583
- No.
- Would you like something to eat?
167
00:13:44,660 --> 00:13:46,924
Uh, something to nibble?
168
00:13:46,996 --> 00:13:50,864
Um, apricots soaked in honey?
169
00:13:50,933 --> 00:13:54,369
Quite why, no one knows, because
it stops them tasting of apricots...
170
00:13:54,436 --> 00:13:56,768
and makes them taste like honey,
171
00:13:56,839 --> 00:14:01,799
and if you wanted honey, you'd just
buy honey instead of... apricots.
172
00:14:01,877 --> 00:14:04,345
Um, but nevertheless,
there we go there.
173
00:14:04,413 --> 00:14:06,574
They're yours if you want them.
174
00:14:06,649 --> 00:14:08,514
No.
175
00:14:11,053 --> 00:14:13,453
Do you always say "no"
to everything?
176
00:14:15,391 --> 00:14:17,325
No.
177
00:14:18,861 --> 00:14:21,489
I'd better be going.
178
00:14:21,563 --> 00:14:24,828
Thanks for your, uh, help.
179
00:14:24,900 --> 00:14:26,834
You're welcome.
180
00:14:26,902 --> 00:14:32,272
And, uh, may I also say,
um, heavenly.
181
00:14:32,341 --> 00:14:35,276
I'll just take
my one chance to say it.
182
00:14:35,344 --> 00:14:37,608
After you've read
that terrible book,
183
00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:40,012
you're certainly not going
to be coming back to the shop.
184
00:14:40,082 --> 00:14:42,710
Thank you.
185
00:14:42,785 --> 00:14:46,744
Yeah.
Well, my pleasure.
186
00:14:57,299 --> 00:15:00,063
So...
187
00:15:00,135 --> 00:15:02,194
it was nice to meet you.
188
00:15:02,271 --> 00:15:06,537
Surreal but, um- but nice.
189
00:15:08,610 --> 00:15:10,544
Sorry.
190
00:15:18,053 --> 00:15:21,511
"Surreal but nice"?
What was I thinking?
191
00:15:33,202 --> 00:15:35,727
- Hi.
- Hi.
192
00:15:35,804 --> 00:15:39,865
- I forgot my other bag.
- Oh, right. Right.
193
00:15:48,684 --> 00:15:50,618
Thanks.
194
00:16:21,183 --> 00:16:25,950
I'm very sorry about
the "surreal but nice" comment.
195
00:16:26,021 --> 00:16:28,489
- Disaster.
- That's okay.
196
00:16:28,557 --> 00:16:33,324
I thought the apricot and honey thing
was the real low point.
197
00:16:35,497 --> 00:16:38,227
Oh, my God.
My flatmate.
198
00:16:38,300 --> 00:16:40,962
I'm sorry.
There's no excuse for him.
199
00:16:43,539 --> 00:16:45,473
- Hey.
- Hi.
200
00:16:45,541 --> 00:16:47,907
I'm just going into the kitchen
to get some food.
201
00:16:47,976 --> 00:16:52,345
Then I'm gonna tell you a story that will
make your balls shrink to the size of raisins.
202
00:16:57,252 --> 00:17:00,847
Probably best
not to tell anyone about this.
203
00:17:00,923 --> 00:17:03,915
Right. Right.
No one.
204
00:17:03,992 --> 00:17:06,290
I mean, I'll tell myself sometimes.
205
00:17:06,361 --> 00:17:08,989
But don't worry.
I won't believe it.
206
00:17:15,437 --> 00:17:17,632
- Bye.
- Bye.
207
00:17:29,051 --> 00:17:32,179
There's something wrong
with this yogurt.
208
00:17:34,056 --> 00:17:37,184
It's not yogurt.
It's mayonnaise.
209
00:17:37,259 --> 00:17:39,284
Oh, right.
There we are then.
210
00:17:39,361 --> 00:17:41,158
Mm.
211
00:17:41,230 --> 00:17:44,131
On for a videofest tonight?
212
00:17:45,534 --> 00:17:48,697
I got some absolute classics.
213
00:17:51,273 --> 00:17:54,299
- Smile.
- No.
214
00:17:57,679 --> 00:18:01,911
- Smile.
- I've got nothing to smile about.
215
00:18:10,959 --> 00:18:12,893
Okay.
216
00:18:12,961 --> 00:18:15,589
In about seven seconds,
217
00:18:15,664 --> 00:18:18,360
I'm going to ask you
to marry me.
218
00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:27,634
Imagine.
219
00:18:27,709 --> 00:18:32,510
Somewhere in the world
there's a man who's allowed to kiss her.
220
00:18:35,083 --> 00:18:37,813
Yes, she is, uh,
221
00:18:37,886 --> 00:18:41,686
fairly fabulous.
222
00:18:49,798 --> 00:18:52,358
- Do you have any books by Dickens?
- No.
223
00:18:52,434 --> 00:18:56,894
No, I'm afraid we're a travel bookshop.
We only sell travel books.
224
00:18:58,540 --> 00:19:01,805
Oh, right. How about
the new John Grisham thriller?
225
00:19:03,245 --> 00:19:07,238
Well, no, 'cause that's, uh-
that's a novel too, isn't it?
226
00:19:07,316 --> 00:19:10,149
Oh, right.
227
00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:16,587
Have you got Winnie the Pooh?
228
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:20,628
Martin, your customer.
229
00:19:20,696 --> 00:19:22,755
Uh, can I help you?
230
00:19:29,438 --> 00:19:31,804
Once in a lifetime
231
00:19:34,209 --> 00:19:36,143
Hey.
232
00:19:36,211 --> 00:19:38,145
Hi.
233
00:19:39,715 --> 00:19:44,448
- Once in a lifetime
- Just, um, incidentally,
234
00:19:44,519 --> 00:19:47,511
uh, why...
are you wearing that?
235
00:19:47,589 --> 00:19:51,320
Combination of factors really.
Uh, no clean clothes.
236
00:19:51,393 --> 00:19:55,295
There never will be, you know,
unless you actually clean your clothes.
237
00:19:55,364 --> 00:19:57,798
Right.
Vicious circle.
238
00:19:57,866 --> 00:20:00,562
And I was, like,
rooting around in your things...
239
00:20:00,635 --> 00:20:02,660
and I found this,
and I thought "cool."
240
00:20:04,324 --> 00:20:06,884
Kinda... spacey.
241
00:20:10,029 --> 00:20:12,930
There's something wrong
with the goggles, though.
242
00:20:12,999 --> 00:20:15,900
No, they were, um, prescription.
243
00:20:15,969 --> 00:20:19,598
- Groovy.
- So I could see all the fishes properly.
244
00:20:19,672 --> 00:20:22,300
You should do more
of this stuff.
245
00:20:22,375 --> 00:20:26,334
- So, look, any messages today?
- Yeah, I wrote a couple down.
246
00:20:26,412 --> 00:20:29,813
So there were two.
There were two messages? Right?
247
00:20:31,751 --> 00:20:35,084
You want me to write down
all your messages?
248
00:20:35,155 --> 00:20:39,285
Okay, who are the ones
that you didn't write down from?
249
00:20:41,194 --> 00:20:42,627
No. Gone completely.
250
00:20:42,695 --> 00:20:44,629
Oh, no.
There was one from your mum.
251
00:20:44,697 --> 00:20:47,325
She said don't forget lunch,
and her leg's hurting again.
252
00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:49,960
- No one else?
- Absolutely no one else.
253
00:20:53,406 --> 00:20:56,705
Though if we're going for this obsessive
writing down all the message thing,
254
00:20:56,776 --> 00:21:00,212
some American girl called Anna
called a few days ago.
255
00:21:05,752 --> 00:21:08,687
- What did she say?
- Well, it was genuinely bizarre.
256
00:21:08,755 --> 00:21:14,216
She said, "Hi. It's Anna."
Then she said, "Call me at The Ritz"...
257
00:21:14,294 --> 00:21:17,786
and then gave herself
a completely different name.
258
00:21:17,864 --> 00:21:21,800
- Which was?
- Absolutely no idea.
259
00:21:21,868 --> 00:21:24,302
Remembering one name's hard enough.
260
00:21:24,370 --> 00:21:26,634
No, I- I know that.
She- She said that.
261
00:21:26,706 --> 00:21:28,970
Um, I know she's using another name.
262
00:21:29,042 --> 00:21:32,500
The problem is
she left the message with my flatmate...
263
00:21:32,579 --> 00:21:34,513
which was a very serious mistake.
264
00:21:34,581 --> 00:21:38,881
Um, I don't know. Imagine, if you will,
the stupidest person you've ever met.
265
00:21:38,952 --> 00:21:43,184
- Are you doing that?
- Yes, sir, I have him in my mind.
266
00:21:43,256 --> 00:21:46,555
And now double it.
And that is the, um- what can I say-
267
00:21:46,626 --> 00:21:49,186
the git that I am living with.
268
00:21:49,262 --> 00:21:50,661
And he can't remember-
269
00:21:50,730 --> 00:21:53,824
- Try Flintstone.
- I'm sorry, what?
270
00:21:53,900 --> 00:21:57,336
I think she said
her name was Flintstone.
271
00:21:59,405 --> 00:22:04,365
I don't- I don't suppose, um,
Flintstone rings any bells, does it?
272
00:22:04,444 --> 00:22:07,709
- Oh, I'll put you right through, sir.
- Oh, my God.
273
00:22:10,350 --> 00:22:13,513
Hello. Hi.
274
00:22:13,586 --> 00:22:15,520
- Hi there.
- Hello?
275
00:22:15,588 --> 00:22:17,522
Hi. Hi.
276
00:22:17,590 --> 00:22:21,356
- Sorry. It's William... Thacker.
- Yes?
277
00:22:21,427 --> 00:22:23,952
Um, we- I work in a bookshop.
278
00:22:24,030 --> 00:22:27,898
Uh-huh. You played it pretty cool there,
waiting for three days to call.
279
00:22:27,967 --> 00:22:31,198
Oh, no, I promise you I've never played
anything cool in my entire life.
280
00:22:31,271 --> 00:22:34,763
My flatmate, who'll I'll stab to death
later, never gave me the message.
281
00:22:36,342 --> 00:22:39,004
I don't know.
Perhaps, um,
282
00:22:39,078 --> 00:22:43,412
I could drop round
for tea later or something.
283
00:22:43,483 --> 00:22:48,477
- Things are pretty busy here. I might be free around 4:00.
- Right. Right. Great.
284
00:22:48,554 --> 00:22:51,284
- Bye.
- Yea- Bye.
285
00:22:56,963 --> 00:22:58,897
Classic.
286
00:23:03,803 --> 00:23:05,737
Classic.
287
00:23:43,676 --> 00:23:46,338
- Which floor?
- Three, please.
288
00:24:14,774 --> 00:24:17,504
Uh, are you sure this is-
289
00:24:17,577 --> 00:24:20,273
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Sure.
290
00:24:31,557 --> 00:24:33,491
- Hi. Hi. I'm Karen.
- Hi.
291
00:24:33,559 --> 00:24:36,084
I'm sorry.
Things are running a little bit late.
292
00:24:36,162 --> 00:24:40,258
Here's the, uh, thing.
Do you wanna come this way?
293
00:24:40,333 --> 00:24:43,063
Through here.
294
00:24:47,140 --> 00:24:49,574
So what did you
think of the film?
295
00:24:49,642 --> 00:24:52,440
Yeah, I thought it was fantastic.
I thought it was, uh,
296
00:24:52,512 --> 00:24:56,073
Close Encounters
meets Jean de Florette.
297
00:24:58,151 --> 00:25:00,085
I agree.
298
00:25:00,153 --> 00:25:03,088
I'm sorry. I didn't get down
what magazines you're from.
299
00:25:03,156 --> 00:25:05,647
- Time Out.
- Great.
300
00:25:05,725 --> 00:25:08,694
And you're from?
301
00:25:11,597 --> 00:25:15,693
Uh, Horse & Hound.
302
00:25:20,139 --> 00:25:23,734
The name's William Thacker. I think,
actually, she might be expecting me.
303
00:25:23,810 --> 00:25:26,608
Oh, okay.
Take a seat and I'll go check.
304
00:25:30,183 --> 00:25:33,584
I see you've, uh-
I see you've brought her some flowers.
305
00:25:33,653 --> 00:25:36,588
No.
306
00:25:36,656 --> 00:25:39,989
These are for my,
um, grandmother.
307
00:25:40,059 --> 00:25:42,823
She's in a hospital
just down the road.
308
00:25:42,895 --> 00:25:45,625
Thought I'd kill two birds
with one stone, you know.
309
00:25:45,698 --> 00:25:48,963
Sure, right.
Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah.
310
00:25:49,035 --> 00:25:51,765
Which hospital's that?
311
00:25:51,838 --> 00:25:53,965
Do you mind me not saying?
312
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:56,304
It's a rather distressing disease.
313
00:25:56,375 --> 00:25:59,105
- Name of the hospital kind of gives it away.
- Absolutely. Sure.
314
00:25:59,178 --> 00:26:01,112
Cheers.
Ooh, yes.
315
00:26:01,180 --> 00:26:03,978
Right, uh, Mr. Thacker.
Will you come this way.
316
00:26:04,050 --> 00:26:06,450
Right.
317
00:26:06,519 --> 00:26:09,386
You've got five minutes.
318
00:26:18,164 --> 00:26:21,361
- Hi.
- Hello.
319
00:26:21,434 --> 00:26:25,393
Uh, I brought these, but clearly-
320
00:26:25,471 --> 00:26:29,271
No, they're great.
They're great.
321
00:26:29,342 --> 00:26:32,209
Ah, listen,
I'm sorry about not ringing back.
322
00:26:32,278 --> 00:26:34,212
The whole "two-names concept"...
323
00:26:34,280 --> 00:26:36,805
was totally too much for my flatmate's
pea-sized intellect.
324
00:26:36,883 --> 00:26:40,717
No, it's a stupid privacy thing.
I always pick a... cartoon character.
325
00:26:40,786 --> 00:26:42,981
Last time I was Mrs. Bambi.
326
00:26:45,892 --> 00:26:49,123
- Everything all right?
- Yes, thank you.
327
00:26:49,195 --> 00:26:51,993
And you're from, uh,
Horse & Hound.
328
00:26:52,064 --> 00:26:54,658
- Yeah.
- Good.
329
00:26:54,734 --> 00:26:57,464
Is that so? Well.
330
00:27:03,442 --> 00:27:05,569
So, uh-
331
00:27:08,681 --> 00:27:13,914
Uh, I'll just... fire away then,
shall I?
332
00:27:15,488 --> 00:27:17,547
Right.
333
00:27:17,623 --> 00:27:19,557
Uh-
334
00:27:20,993 --> 00:27:24,326
The film's great, and, um,
335
00:27:24,397 --> 00:27:27,389
I just was wondering whether...
336
00:27:27,466 --> 00:27:29,627
you ever thought of having, um,
337
00:27:29,702 --> 00:27:33,433
more, uh, horses in it.
338
00:27:36,576 --> 00:27:40,103
Uh, well, we would have liked to,
339
00:27:40,179 --> 00:27:45,515
but it was, um, difficult,
obviously, being set in space.
340
00:27:47,019 --> 00:27:50,853
Space, right, yeah.
Yeah, obviously very difficult.
341
00:27:52,258 --> 00:27:54,192
I'm so sorry.
I arrived outside.
342
00:27:54,260 --> 00:27:56,228
They thrust this thing
into my hand-
343
00:27:56,295 --> 00:27:59,594
No, it's my fault.
I thought this would all be over by now.
344
00:27:59,665 --> 00:28:02,395
I just wanted to sort of apologize
for the kissing thing.
345
00:28:02,468 --> 00:28:04,402
I seriously don't know
what came over me.
346
00:28:04,470 --> 00:28:07,462
And I just wanted to make sure
that you were fine about it.
347
00:28:09,308 --> 00:28:14,769
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely fine.
348
00:28:14,847 --> 00:28:19,011
Do remember that Miss Scott is also
keen to talk about her next project...
349
00:28:19,085 --> 00:28:22,782
which is, um, shooting
later in the summer.
350
00:28:22,855 --> 00:28:26,313
Ah, yes, excellent.
Excellent.
351
00:28:31,297 --> 00:28:35,427
Any horses in that one?
352
00:28:35,501 --> 00:28:40,939
Or hounds for that matter. Our readers
are equally intrigued by both species.
353
00:28:41,007 --> 00:28:43,805
It takes place on a submarine.
354
00:28:43,876 --> 00:28:47,334
Oh. Well, bad luck.
355
00:28:48,748 --> 00:28:51,376
But, um,
356
00:28:51,450 --> 00:28:53,748
if there were horses in it,
357
00:28:53,819 --> 00:28:56,413
would you be riding them...
358
00:28:56,489 --> 00:29:01,119
or would you be getting, a-
a stunt-horse-double-man-thing?
359
00:29:03,529 --> 00:29:08,364
I- I'm a complete moron.
I apologize. I-
360
00:29:08,434 --> 00:29:12,336
This is very weird. It's the sort
of thing that happens in dreams,
361
00:29:12,405 --> 00:29:14,999
not in real life.
362
00:29:15,074 --> 00:29:17,565
I mean, good dreams.
It's a-
363
00:29:17,643 --> 00:29:21,204
It's a dream, in fact,
uh, to see you again.
364
00:29:22,782 --> 00:29:26,445
What happens next in the dream?
365
00:29:28,321 --> 00:29:32,690
I suppose in the, uh, dream-
366
00:29:32,758 --> 00:29:36,319
dream scenario-
I just, uh,
367
00:29:36,395 --> 00:29:38,590
change my personality...
368
00:29:38,664 --> 00:29:41,292
because you can do that
in dreams and, um,
369
00:29:43,669 --> 00:29:47,935
walk over and, uh, kiss the girl.
370
00:29:48,007 --> 00:29:50,635
But, uh-
371
00:29:58,317 --> 00:30:02,048
Time's up, I'm afraid.
Did you get what you wanted?
372
00:30:02,121 --> 00:30:07,308
- Um, nearly, nearly.
- Well, maybe just one last question.
373
00:30:08,716 --> 00:30:11,344
- Sure.
- Right, right.
374
00:30:14,989 --> 00:30:18,390
Are you... busy tonight?
375
00:30:18,459 --> 00:30:23,362
- Yes.
- Right. Right.
376
00:30:24,933 --> 00:30:28,892
- Come in.
- Well, it was nice to meet you.
377
00:30:28,970 --> 00:30:31,234
Yes, and you.
378
00:30:31,306 --> 00:30:33,740
Surreal... but nice.
379
00:30:33,808 --> 00:30:38,211
Thank you. You are Horse & Hounds'
favorite actress.
380
00:30:39,581 --> 00:30:42,049
You and Black Beauty...
381
00:30:42,116 --> 00:30:44,050
tied.
382
00:30:49,157 --> 00:30:51,091
How was she?
383
00:30:51,159 --> 00:30:54,651
Oh, um, fabulous.
384
00:30:54,729 --> 00:30:58,825
Excellent. Wait a minute.
She took your grandmother's flowers.
385
00:30:58,900 --> 00:31:02,461
Uh, yeah, yeah.
That's right.
386
00:31:02,537 --> 00:31:04,596
- Bitch.
- Oh, Mr. Thacker.
387
00:31:04,672 --> 00:31:09,109
Mr. Thacker, if you'd like to come with
me, we can rush you through the others.
388
00:31:09,177 --> 00:31:10,610
The others?
389
00:31:10,678 --> 00:31:13,272
Mr. Thacker is from Horse & Hound.
390
00:31:16,251 --> 00:31:18,947
- How's it going?
- Very well, thank you.
391
00:31:19,020 --> 00:31:22,217
Have a seat.
392
00:31:22,290 --> 00:31:25,487
Well, did you enjoy the film?
393
00:31:25,560 --> 00:31:28,620
Yes, enormously.
394
00:31:28,696 --> 00:31:30,527
- Well, fire away.
- Right.
395
00:31:32,100 --> 00:31:34,432
Did you enjoy making the film?
396
00:31:34,502 --> 00:31:38,404
- Yes, I did.
- Good.
397
00:31:38,473 --> 00:31:40,941
Any bit in particular?
398
00:31:41,009 --> 00:31:44,137
You tell me what bit
you enjoyed the most,
399
00:31:44,212 --> 00:31:47,204
and I'll tell you
if I enjoyed making that bit.
400
00:31:49,250 --> 00:31:52,981
Uh, I...
401
00:31:53,054 --> 00:31:56,080
liked the bit in space...
402
00:31:56,157 --> 00:31:58,091
very much.
403
00:31:58,159 --> 00:32:01,720
Did you identify with the character
you're playing?
404
00:32:05,466 --> 00:32:09,562
- No.
- No.
405
00:32:11,472 --> 00:32:15,238
Oh. Why not?
406
00:32:21,683 --> 00:32:25,346
Because he's playing
a psychopathic flesh-eating robot.
407
00:32:25,420 --> 00:32:27,650
Classic.
408
00:32:27,722 --> 00:32:30,520
So, uh,
409
00:32:30,591 --> 00:32:33,185
is this your first film?
410
00:32:33,261 --> 00:32:36,128
No. It's my 22nd.
411
00:32:36,197 --> 00:32:40,133
Of course it is.
Any favorites among the 22?
412
00:32:41,569 --> 00:32:43,503
Working with Leonardo.
413
00:32:43,571 --> 00:32:47,632
- Da Vinci?
- DiCaprio.
414
00:32:47,709 --> 00:32:50,576
Of course.
415
00:32:50,645 --> 00:32:54,638
And is- is he your favorite
Italian director?
416
00:32:59,187 --> 00:33:02,315
- Mr. Thacker.
- Oh, no.
417
00:33:02,390 --> 00:33:05,188
- Have you got a minute?
- No.
418
00:33:11,132 --> 00:33:12,690
Hi.
419
00:33:14,869 --> 00:33:16,803
Hi.
420
00:33:16,871 --> 00:33:20,568
Um- Yeah, so the, um-
421
00:33:20,641 --> 00:33:24,907
the- the thing I was doing tonight,
I'm not doing anymore.
422
00:33:24,979 --> 00:33:27,470
I told them I had
to spend the evening...
423
00:33:27,548 --> 00:33:31,348
with Britain's premier
equestrian journalist.
424
00:33:31,419 --> 00:33:34,513
Oh. Well, great.
425
00:33:34,589 --> 00:33:36,784
Fantastic.
That's, uh-
426
00:33:36,858 --> 00:33:40,089
Oh. Shittity brickitty.
427
00:33:40,161 --> 00:33:43,722
It's my sister's birthday. Shit.
We're meant to be having dinner.
428
00:33:43,798 --> 00:33:46,699
- Okay, that's fine.
- No. I'm sure I can get out of it.
429
00:33:46,768 --> 00:33:50,226
No, I mean, if it's fine with you,
I'll be your date.
430
00:33:51,806 --> 00:33:54,900
You-
You'll be my date...
431
00:33:54,976 --> 00:33:57,706
to my little sister's
birthday party?
432
00:33:57,779 --> 00:34:01,545
- If it's all right.
- Well, yeah, I'm sure it's all right.
433
00:34:01,616 --> 00:34:03,481
My friend Max is cooking,
434
00:34:03,551 --> 00:34:06,543
and he is generally acknowledged
to be the worst cook in the world.
435
00:34:06,621 --> 00:34:11,058
But, um, you know, you could hide
the food in your handbag or something.
436
00:34:11,125 --> 00:34:15,357
- Okay.
- Okay.
437
00:34:17,365 --> 00:34:21,267
- He's bringing a girl?
- Miracles do happen.
438
00:34:21,335 --> 00:34:25,431
- Does the girl have a name?
- Don't know. Wouldn't say.
439
00:34:25,506 --> 00:34:28,236
Oh, Christ!
What is going on in there?
440
00:34:28,309 --> 00:34:32,109
Oh, God!
441
00:34:34,315 --> 00:34:37,113
Hi. Come on in.
Vague food crisis.
442
00:34:43,024 --> 00:34:45,049
Hiya! Sorry.
443
00:34:45,126 --> 00:34:48,061
The guinea-fowl is proving
more complicated than expected.
444
00:34:48,129 --> 00:34:51,064
- He's cooking guinea-fowl?
- Don't even ask.
445
00:34:51,132 --> 00:34:53,999
- Hi.
- Hi.
446
00:34:54,068 --> 00:34:56,662
Good Lord,
you're the spitting image of-
447
00:34:56,737 --> 00:34:58,728
Bella, this is Anna.
448
00:35:00,508 --> 00:35:02,635
- Right.
- Okay, crisis over.
449
00:35:02,710 --> 00:35:05,645
Max, this is Anna.
450
00:35:05,713 --> 00:35:09,149
- Hi.
- Hello, Anna-
451
00:35:09,217 --> 00:35:11,981
Scott.
Have some wine.
452
00:35:12,053 --> 00:35:14,317
Thank you.
453
00:35:14,388 --> 00:35:16,151
I'll get it.
454
00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:21,094
Red or white?
455
00:35:21,162 --> 00:35:23,926
- Oh. Hey.
- Hi.
456
00:35:23,998 --> 00:35:27,525
- Oh, yes, happy birthday.
- Thank you.
457
00:35:27,602 --> 00:35:29,832
Look, your brother's
brought this girl.
458
00:35:29,904 --> 00:35:31,337
Hi, guys.
459
00:35:32,673 --> 00:35:34,664
Oh, holy fuck!
460
00:35:34,742 --> 00:35:38,200
Hon, this is Anna. Anna, this is Honey.
She's my baby sister.
461
00:35:38,279 --> 00:35:40,304
Oh. Hi.
462
00:35:40,381 --> 00:35:43,282
Oh, God. This is one
of those key moments in life...
463
00:35:43,351 --> 00:35:46,286
when it's possible
you can be really genuinely cool...
464
00:35:46,354 --> 00:35:51,519
and I- I'm going to fail
just a hundred percent.
465
00:35:53,561 --> 00:35:57,998
I- I absolutely,
totally and utterly adore you.
466
00:35:58,065 --> 00:36:02,365
And I just think... you are
the most beautiful woman in the world.
467
00:36:02,436 --> 00:36:05,633
And, more importantly,
I genuinely believe,
468
00:36:05,706 --> 00:36:10,643
and I've believed for some time now,
that we could be best friends.
469
00:36:10,711 --> 00:36:13,646
So what do you think?
470
00:36:15,716 --> 00:36:17,684
Uh, lucky me.
471
00:36:19,620 --> 00:36:22,350
Well, happy birthday.
472
00:36:22,423 --> 00:36:27,486
Oh, you gave me a present.
We're best friends already then.
473
00:36:27,562 --> 00:36:30,258
Marry Will. He's a really nice guy.
Then we can be sisters.
474
00:36:30,331 --> 00:36:32,697
Well, I'll think about it.
475
00:36:34,569 --> 00:36:37,094
That'll be Bernie.
476
00:36:38,306 --> 00:36:40,638
- Hi.
- Hi. Sorry I'm late.
477
00:36:40,708 --> 00:36:43,643
Bollocksed up at work again, I fear.
478
00:36:43,711 --> 00:36:46,236
- Millions down the drain.
- Well done.
479
00:36:46,314 --> 00:36:49,477
- Bernie, this is Anna.
- Hello, Anna. Delighted to meet you.
480
00:36:49,550 --> 00:36:53,418
- And you.
- Honey bunny, Happy birthday to you
481
00:36:53,487 --> 00:36:56,285
- Hi, Bella.
- Hi.
482
00:36:56,357 --> 00:37:00,020
Um, it- it- it's a hat.
You don't have to wear it or anything.
483
00:37:00,094 --> 00:37:03,029
- Hi, Will.
- Hi.
484
00:37:03,097 --> 00:37:05,895
Hi.
485
00:37:05,967 --> 00:37:08,595
- Hi.
- What?
486
00:37:08,669 --> 00:37:10,637
- Wine, Bernie?
- Mm.
487
00:37:10,705 --> 00:37:13,139
You haven't slept with her, have you?
488
00:37:13,207 --> 00:37:15,641
That is a cheap question, and
the answer is, of course, no comment.
489
00:37:15,710 --> 00:37:17,644
- No comment means "yes."
- No, it doesn't.
490
00:37:17,712 --> 00:37:19,646
- Do you ever masturbate?
- Definitely no comment.
491
00:37:19,714 --> 00:37:22,376
- You see, it means "yes."
- Oh, my God!
492
00:37:22,450 --> 00:37:26,978
So, uh, tell me,
um, Anna, what do you do?
493
00:37:27,054 --> 00:37:30,820
- I'm an actress.
- Oh, splendid.
494
00:37:30,891 --> 00:37:32,916
What do you do?
495
00:37:32,994 --> 00:37:36,760
I'm actually in the stock market myself,
so, uh, not really similar fields.
496
00:37:36,831 --> 00:37:39,959
Though, um- um, I have done
the odd bit of amateur stuff.
497
00:37:40,034 --> 00:37:44,528
Um- uh, P.G. Wodehouse.
Farce, all that, you know.
498
00:37:44,605 --> 00:37:47,233
"Careful there, Vicar."
499
00:37:47,308 --> 00:37:50,573
Always imagined it's a pretty tough job,
though, acting.
500
00:37:50,645 --> 00:37:54,638
- The wages are a scandal, aren't they?
- They can be.
501
00:37:54,715 --> 00:37:56,683
I see friends from university-
clever chaps.
502
00:37:56,751 --> 00:37:58,719
Been in the business longer than you.
503
00:37:58,786 --> 00:38:03,519
They're scraping by on seven,
eight thousand a year.
504
00:38:03,591 --> 00:38:05,923
You know, it's no life.
505
00:38:05,993 --> 00:38:10,362
- What sort of acting do you do?
- Films, mainly.
506
00:38:10,431 --> 00:38:15,334
Oh, splendid. Oh, well done.
How's the pay in movies?
507
00:38:15,403 --> 00:38:20,306
I mean, last film you did,
what did you get paid?
508
00:38:20,374 --> 00:38:22,604
Fifteen million dollars.
509
00:38:23,678 --> 00:38:25,612
Right.
510
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:29,878
So that's, well, fairly good.
511
00:38:29,950 --> 00:38:32,009
Right, I think we're ready.
512
00:38:32,086 --> 00:38:34,020
- Ooh.
- Okay.
513
00:38:34,088 --> 00:38:36,022
Bella, can you tell me
where I can find-
514
00:38:36,090 --> 00:38:38,149
Oh, sorry.
It's down the corridor on the right.
515
00:38:38,225 --> 00:38:40,284
I'll show you.
516
00:38:43,230 --> 00:38:45,721
Quickly, quickly.
Talk very, very quickly.
517
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:47,427
What are you doing here
with Anna Scott?
518
00:38:47,501 --> 00:38:49,492
- Anna Scott?
- Yes. Shut up!
519
00:38:49,570 --> 00:38:51,561
- What, the film star?
- Shh!
520
00:38:51,639 --> 00:38:54,267
- Oh, God!
- What?
521
00:38:54,341 --> 00:38:57,174
- Oh, God. Oh, goddy God.
- What did you say to her?
522
00:38:57,244 --> 00:39:00,702
I don't believe it.
I actually walked into the loo with her.
523
00:39:00,781 --> 00:39:03,648
I was still chatting
when she started unbuttoning her jeans.
524
00:39:03,718 --> 00:39:06,152
- She had to ask me to leave.
- Oh, God.
525
00:39:06,220 --> 00:39:08,188
So you knew who she was?
526
00:39:08,255 --> 00:39:10,519
Of course I did, but he didn't.
527
00:39:10,591 --> 00:39:14,652
Well, not instantly, but I- I-
I got away with it.
528
00:39:17,732 --> 00:39:22,499
- What do you think of the guinea-fowl?
- I'm a vegetarian.
529
00:39:22,570 --> 00:39:25,004
Oh, God.
530
00:39:25,072 --> 00:39:27,870
So, how's the guinea-fowl?
531
00:39:27,942 --> 00:39:31,343
Best guinea-fowl
I've ever tasted.
532
00:39:31,412 --> 00:39:33,937
It's amazing how you
533
00:39:34,014 --> 00:39:36,710
Can speak right to my heart
534
00:39:42,289 --> 00:39:45,690
Without saying a word
535
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:49,696
You can light up the dark
536
00:39:53,667 --> 00:39:58,934
Try as I may, I can never explain
537
00:39:59,006 --> 00:40:05,021
- What I hear when you
don't say a thing
538
00:40:05,155 --> 00:40:09,091
Having you here, Anna, firmly
establishes what I've long suspected-
539
00:40:09,159 --> 00:40:11,957
that we really are the most
desperate lot of underachievers.
540
00:40:12,028 --> 00:40:14,963
- Shame.
- I'm not saying it's a bad thing.
541
00:40:15,031 --> 00:40:18,432
In fact, I think it's something
we should take pride in.
542
00:40:18,501 --> 00:40:21,766
I'm gonna give the last brownie
as a prize...
543
00:40:21,838 --> 00:40:24,238
to the saddest act here.
544
00:40:24,307 --> 00:40:27,037
- Uh-oh.
- Bern.
545
00:40:27,110 --> 00:40:30,341
Yeah, all right.
Well, obviously, it's me, isn't it?
546
00:40:30,413 --> 00:40:33,473
I mean, I work in the city in a job
I don't understand,
547
00:40:33,550 --> 00:40:35,984
and everyone keeps
getting promoted above me.
548
00:40:36,052 --> 00:40:38,612
I haven't had a girlfriend since-
well, since puberty.
549
00:40:38,688 --> 00:40:41,748
And... nobody fancies me.
550
00:40:41,825 --> 00:40:44,385
And if these cheeks get any chubbier,
they never will.
551
00:40:44,461 --> 00:40:48,261
- Nonsense. I fancy you.
- Really?
552
00:40:48,331 --> 00:40:50,925
Yeah. Or I did
before you got so fat.
553
00:40:51,001 --> 00:40:53,936
You see.
And unless I'm much mistaken,
554
00:40:54,004 --> 00:40:56,632
your job still pays you
rather a lot of money...
555
00:40:56,706 --> 00:40:59,140
whilst Honey here
earns 20 pence a week...
556
00:40:59,209 --> 00:41:02,042
flogging her guts out
in London's worst record store.
557
00:41:02,112 --> 00:41:05,240
Yes! And I haven't got hair.
I've got feathers.
558
00:41:05,315 --> 00:41:09,149
And I've got funny goggly eyes.
And I'm attracted to cruel men.
559
00:41:09,219 --> 00:41:11,779
And, actually,
no one will marry me...
560
00:41:11,855 --> 00:41:14,983
because, um, my boosies
have actually started shrinking.
561
00:41:15,058 --> 00:41:17,492
- You see, it's incredibly sad.
- But on the other hand,
562
00:41:17,560 --> 00:41:19,323
her best friend is Anna Scott.
563
00:41:19,396 --> 00:41:22,854
That's true. I can't deny it.
She needs me. What can I say?
564
00:41:24,034 --> 00:41:27,629
And most of her limbs work, whereas
I'm stuck in this thing day and night,
565
00:41:27,704 --> 00:41:29,729
in a house full of ramps.
566
00:41:29,806 --> 00:41:32,673
And to add insult
to serious injury,
567
00:41:32,742 --> 00:41:38,009
I've totally given up smoking,
my favorite thing.
568
00:41:38,081 --> 00:41:42,450
And, um, well, the truth is,
569
00:41:42,519 --> 00:41:44,714
we can't have a baby.
570
00:41:50,393 --> 00:41:52,486
Oh, Belle.
571
00:41:52,562 --> 00:41:56,020
C'est la vie.
572
00:41:57,701 --> 00:42:01,569
Still, um, we're lucky in lots of ways.
573
00:42:01,638 --> 00:42:04,664
But surely that's worth a brownie.
574
00:42:06,242 --> 00:42:11,509
Well, I don't know.
Look at William.
575
00:42:11,581 --> 00:42:14,744
- Very unsuccessful professionally.
- That's true.
576
00:42:14,818 --> 00:42:19,687
Divorced. Used to be handsome,
now kind of squidgy round the edges.
577
00:42:20,890 --> 00:42:23,688
And absolutely certain never
to hear from Anna again...
578
00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:26,820
- once she's heard that his
nickname at school was- - Floppy.
579
00:42:26,896 --> 00:42:30,059
You did.
I can't believe it, you did.
580
00:42:30,133 --> 00:42:33,534
Thanks very much. Thank you.
Well, at least I get the last brownie.
581
00:42:33,603 --> 00:42:35,537
I think so, yes.
582
00:42:35,605 --> 00:42:37,573
Well, wait.
What about me?
583
00:42:39,142 --> 00:42:43,203
I'm sorry?
You think you deserve the brownie?
584
00:42:43,279 --> 00:42:47,511
Well, a shot at it at least, huh?
585
00:42:47,584 --> 00:42:50,519
You'll have to prove it.
This is a very, very good brownie.
586
00:42:50,587 --> 00:42:53,249
I'm gonna fight for it.
587
00:42:53,323 --> 00:42:56,690
I've been on a diet
every day since I was 19,
588
00:42:56,760 --> 00:43:00,093
which basically means
I've been hungry for a decade.
589
00:43:02,332 --> 00:43:05,927
I've had a series of not-nice
boyfriends, one of whom hit me.
590
00:43:06,002 --> 00:43:09,062
Uh, and every time
I get my heart broken,
591
00:43:09,139 --> 00:43:13,473
the newspapers splash it about
as though it's entertainment.
592
00:43:15,478 --> 00:43:20,643
And... it's taken two rather painful,
um, operations...
593
00:43:20,717 --> 00:43:22,708
to get me looking like this.
594
00:43:22,786 --> 00:43:25,914
- Really?
- Really.
595
00:43:28,057 --> 00:43:32,858
And one day not long from now,
my looks will go,
596
00:43:32,929 --> 00:43:35,762
they will discover I can't act,
597
00:43:35,832 --> 00:43:40,701
and I will become
some sad, middle-aged woman...
598
00:43:40,770 --> 00:43:45,571
who... looks a bit like someone
who was famous for a while.
599
00:43:53,516 --> 00:43:55,984
No, nice try, gorgeous,
but you don't fool anyone.
600
00:43:56,052 --> 00:43:58,646
No.
601
00:43:58,721 --> 00:44:00,689
Pathetic effort
to hog the brownie.
602
00:44:02,692 --> 00:44:06,128
- Thank you for such a terrific time.
- I'm delighted.
603
00:44:07,564 --> 00:44:10,499
- That's a great tie.
- Now you're lying.
604
00:44:10,567 --> 00:44:13,195
Okay, it's true.
I told you I was bad at acting.
605
00:44:13,269 --> 00:44:15,737
- It was lovely to meet you.
- Yeah, and you. And you.
606
00:44:15,805 --> 00:44:18,569
I'll wait until you've gone
before I tell him you're a vegetarian.
607
00:44:18,641 --> 00:44:21,439
- No!
- Oh!
608
00:44:23,012 --> 00:44:26,504
- Good night.
- I'm so sorry about the loo thing.
609
00:44:26,583 --> 00:44:29,108
I meant to leave.
I just-
610
00:44:29,185 --> 00:44:31,619
Ring me if you want someone
to go shopping with.
611
00:44:31,688 --> 00:44:35,215
I know lots of nice, cheap places,
not that money is necessarily-
612
00:44:35,291 --> 00:44:37,225
It was just so nice to meet you.
613
00:44:37,293 --> 00:44:40,194
- Happy birthday. You're my style guru.
- Thank you.
614
00:44:40,263 --> 00:44:42,424
- Sorry. Can I just-
- Oh.
615
00:44:42,498 --> 00:44:44,432
- Thanks.
- Leave her.
616
00:44:44,500 --> 00:44:46,434
- Good night, everyone.
- Bye.
617
00:44:46,502 --> 00:44:49,403
Max, Belle,
we'll see you in a couple of days.
618
00:44:49,472 --> 00:44:51,997
- Thank you, everybody. Call us.
- Bye, guys.
619
00:44:52,075 --> 00:44:54,737
- Bye, Anna.
- Love your work.
620
00:44:54,811 --> 00:44:57,245
Bye, Hon.
621
00:45:03,653 --> 00:45:07,612
Sorry. They always do that
when I leave the house.
622
00:45:07,690 --> 00:45:11,353
It's a stupid thing.
I hate it.
623
00:45:21,437 --> 00:45:24,133
- "Floppy," huh?
- It's the hair.
624
00:45:24,207 --> 00:45:26,607
- Mm-hmm.
- It's to do with the hair.
625
00:45:29,178 --> 00:45:31,510
Why is she in a wheelchair?
626
00:45:31,581 --> 00:45:36,018
Uh, because she had an accident
about 18 months ago.
627
00:45:36,085 --> 00:45:39,248
And the pregnancy thing,
is that to do with the accident?
628
00:45:39,322 --> 00:45:40,755
You know, I'm not sure.
629
00:45:40,823 --> 00:45:44,122
I don't think they tried for kids
before, as fate would have it.
630
00:45:52,635 --> 00:45:55,661
Do you want to, um-
631
00:45:55,738 --> 00:45:58,866
My place is just, um-
632
00:45:58,942 --> 00:46:01,103
Too complicated.
633
00:46:01,177 --> 00:46:03,475
That's fine.
634
00:46:08,384 --> 00:46:10,579
Busy tomorrow?
635
00:46:12,655 --> 00:46:16,091
- I thought you were leaving tomorrow.
- I was.
636
00:46:18,928 --> 00:46:23,558
All these streets round here have these
mysterious communal gardens in the middle of them.
637
00:46:23,633 --> 00:46:25,999
- They're like little villages.
- Let's go in.
638
00:46:26,069 --> 00:46:28,663
Ah, no, that's the point.
They're private villages.
639
00:46:28,738 --> 00:46:31,673
Only the people who live round the edges
are allowed in.
640
00:46:31,741 --> 00:46:35,074
Oh. You abide by rules like that?
641
00:46:35,144 --> 00:46:37,476
I don't. No, no.
But others do.
642
00:46:37,547 --> 00:46:39,947
I just do what I want.
643
00:46:40,016 --> 00:46:42,951
Um- Right.
644
00:46:46,222 --> 00:46:49,089
Whoopsidaisies.
645
00:46:49,158 --> 00:46:51,683
What did you say?
646
00:46:51,761 --> 00:46:54,423
- Nothing.
- Yes, you did.
647
00:46:54,497 --> 00:46:58,627
- No, I didn't.
- You said, "Whoopsidaisies."
648
00:46:58,701 --> 00:47:02,000
No one says, "Whoopsidaisies," do they?
I mean, unless they're-
649
00:47:02,071 --> 00:47:05,438
There is no "unless." Because no one
has said "Whoopsidaisies" for 50 years.
650
00:47:05,508 --> 00:47:09,376
And even then it was- it was just
little girls with blonde ringlets.
651
00:47:09,445 --> 00:47:13,609
Exactly. Right.
So here we go again.
652
00:47:15,551 --> 00:47:18,486
Oh! Oh! Whoopsidaisies.
653
00:47:20,056 --> 00:47:22,684
Yeah, well, it's a disease.
It's a clinical thing.
654
00:47:22,759 --> 00:47:26,525
I'm taking pills and having injections.
And I'm told it won't last long.
655
00:47:26,596 --> 00:47:29,565
- Okay, stand aside.
- I don't think that's a good idea.
656
00:47:29,632 --> 00:47:32,624
Really, it's quite, um, tricky.
Anna.
657
00:47:34,303 --> 00:47:38,501
Anna, don't. It's harder than it-
No, it's not. It's easy.
658
00:47:46,582 --> 00:47:48,516
Come on, Flopsy.
659
00:47:48,584 --> 00:47:50,745
Right.
660
00:47:50,820 --> 00:47:53,345
All right.
661
00:47:53,423 --> 00:47:57,382
Oh, bugger.
662
00:47:57,460 --> 00:48:00,952
Oh, God,
this could be very unpleasant.
663
00:48:04,702 --> 00:48:08,502
Ay!
Bugger, bugger.
664
00:48:12,043 --> 00:48:17,310
Now what in the world in this garden
could make that ordeal worthwhile?
665
00:48:30,595 --> 00:48:33,325
Nice garden.
666
00:49:05,663 --> 00:49:08,632
"For June who loved this garden.
667
00:49:08,700 --> 00:49:11,999
From Joseph who always sat beside her."
668
00:49:15,740 --> 00:49:19,039
Some people do spend
their whole lives together.
669
00:49:53,800 --> 00:49:55,000
- Come and sit with me.
670
00:50:09,400 --> 00:50:10,854
- Bollocks! Bollocks!
671
00:50:10,928 --> 00:50:13,829
- Have you seen my glasses?
- No, afraid not.
672
00:50:13,898 --> 00:50:18,096
Big, big bollocks!
Average day, my glasses are everywhere.
673
00:50:18,169 --> 00:50:20,603
Everywhere I look
there's a pair of glasses.
674
00:50:20,672 --> 00:50:23,402
But when I want to go to the cinema,
they've vanished.
675
00:50:23,474 --> 00:50:25,408
It's one of life's real cruelties.
676
00:50:25,476 --> 00:50:28,934
That's compared to, like, earthquakes in
the Far East or testicular cancer, is it?
677
00:50:29,013 --> 00:50:31,345
Oh, shit.
Is that the time?
678
00:50:31,416 --> 00:50:35,011
- Thanks for all your help
on the glasses thing.
679
00:50:35,086 --> 00:50:37,452
Oh, you're welcome.
Did you find them?
680
00:50:37,522 --> 00:50:39,490
- Sort of.
- Great.
681
00:50:48,566 --> 00:50:55,904
Oh, the smile on your face
lets me know that you need me
682
00:50:55,973 --> 00:50:57,907
There's a truth in your eyes
683
00:50:57,975 --> 00:51:02,639
Saying you'll never leave me
684
00:51:04,415 --> 00:51:09,580
The touch of your hand says
you'll catch me wherever I fall
685
00:51:09,654 --> 00:51:11,588
So who left who?
686
00:51:11,656 --> 00:51:14,557
- Uh, she left me.
- Why?
687
00:51:14,625 --> 00:51:17,924
- She saw through me.
- Uh-oh.
688
00:51:17,995 --> 00:51:21,330
That's not good.
689
00:51:21,399 --> 00:51:23,629
You can give me
Anna Scott any day.
690
00:51:23,701 --> 00:51:26,602
I didn't like her last film. Fell asleep
as soon as the lights went down.
691
00:51:26,671 --> 00:51:28,605
I don't really care
what the film's like.
692
00:51:28,673 --> 00:51:31,403
Any film with her in,
it's fine by me.
693
00:51:33,444 --> 00:51:35,605
She's not my type at all.
I prefer the other one.
694
00:51:35,680 --> 00:51:38,205
You know, blonde, sweet-looking.
695
00:51:38,282 --> 00:51:40,216
You know, what's-her-name.
696
00:51:40,284 --> 00:51:42,582
Has an orgasm every time
you take her out for a cup of coffee.
697
00:51:42,653 --> 00:51:44,780
Meg Ryan.
698
00:51:44,856 --> 00:51:48,292
No, she's too wholesome.
The point about Miss Scott is...
699
00:51:48,359 --> 00:51:51,294
she's got that twinkle in her eyes.
700
00:51:51,362 --> 00:51:54,058
Probably drug-induced.
Spends most of her life in bloody rehab.
701
00:51:54,132 --> 00:51:56,726
Well, whatever.
She's so clearly up for it.
702
00:51:56,801 --> 00:51:59,736
You see, most girls, they're all like,
"Stay away, chum."
703
00:51:59,804 --> 00:52:03,900
But Anna,
she is absolutely gagging for it.
704
00:52:05,977 --> 00:52:08,445
Do you know that in over 50%
of the languages,
705
00:52:08,513 --> 00:52:12,313
the word for "actress" is
the same as the word for "prostitute"?
706
00:52:12,383 --> 00:52:15,045
Where did you get that from?
707
00:52:15,119 --> 00:52:19,783
And Anna is your definitive actress,
708
00:52:19,857 --> 00:52:23,657
someone really filthy
you can just flip over and start again.
709
00:52:25,229 --> 00:52:28,494
- Right, that's it. Sorry.
- No, no. There's really no point.
710
00:52:31,469 --> 00:52:33,664
Um, sorry-
sorry to disturb you guys.
711
00:52:33,738 --> 00:52:36,172
- But, um-
- Can I help?
712
00:52:36,240 --> 00:52:39,801
Well, yeah. I wish I hadn't overheard
your conversation, but I did.
713
00:52:39,877 --> 00:52:42,471
And, um, I just think, you know,
714
00:52:42,547 --> 00:52:45,482
the person you're talking about
is a real person.
715
00:52:45,550 --> 00:52:48,519
And I think she probably deserves
a little bit more consideration...
716
00:52:48,586 --> 00:52:51,282
rather than having jerks like you
drooling over her.
717
00:52:51,355 --> 00:52:54,017
Oh, sod off, mate.
What are you, her dad?
718
00:53:01,732 --> 00:53:04,030
- I'm sorry.
- No, I love that you tried.
719
00:53:04,101 --> 00:53:07,002
Time was I'd have done the same thing.
In fact-
720
00:53:11,943 --> 00:53:13,877
Hi.
721
00:53:15,346 --> 00:53:17,371
Oh, my God.
722
00:53:17,448 --> 00:53:19,973
I just wanted to apologize for
my friend. He's very sensitive.
723
00:53:20,051 --> 00:53:21,518
Uh, look, I'm sorr-
724
00:53:21,586 --> 00:53:24,521
No, no, leave it. It's, you know-
I'm sure you didn't mean any harm.
725
00:53:24,589 --> 00:53:27,080
I'm sure it was just friendly banter.
726
00:53:27,158 --> 00:53:30,059
I'm sure you guys have dicks
the size of peanuts. Enjoy your dinner.
727
00:53:30,127 --> 00:53:33,153
The tuna's really good.
728
00:53:35,433 --> 00:53:38,869
I shouldn't have done that.
I shouldn't have done that.
729
00:53:38,936 --> 00:53:41,871
- No, you were brilliant.
- I'm rash and I'm stupid.
730
00:53:41,939 --> 00:53:45,033
What am I doing with you?
731
00:53:45,109 --> 00:53:47,737
Uh, I don't know, I'm afraid.
732
00:53:47,812 --> 00:53:49,746
I don't either.
733
00:53:54,252 --> 00:53:56,846
Here we are.
734
00:53:56,921 --> 00:53:58,855
Yes.
735
00:54:00,391 --> 00:54:02,723
- Well, look-
- Do you wanna come up?
736
00:54:04,996 --> 00:54:09,899
Well, there seems to be...
lots of reasons why I shouldn't, so-
737
00:54:09,967 --> 00:54:12,902
There are lots of reasons.
738
00:54:16,173 --> 00:54:19,404
Do you wanna come up?
739
00:54:22,813 --> 00:54:25,043
Give me five minutes?
740
00:54:42,366 --> 00:54:44,300
- Hi.
- Hi.
741
00:54:47,138 --> 00:54:50,471
To be able to do that
is such a wonderful thing.
742
00:54:50,541 --> 00:54:52,566
- You've got to go.
- Why?
743
00:54:52,643 --> 00:54:57,774
Because my boyfriend who was in America
is, in fact, now in the next room.
744
00:54:57,848 --> 00:55:00,078
- Boyfriend?
- Yes.
745
00:55:00,151 --> 00:55:03,712
- Baby, who is it?
- Uh, it's, uh-
746
00:55:04,822 --> 00:55:07,620
- Uh-
- Uh, room service.
747
00:55:07,692 --> 00:55:12,322
Oh. How you doing? I thought you guys
always wore those, uh, penguin coats.
748
00:55:13,397 --> 00:55:15,331
Usually we do.
749
00:55:15,399 --> 00:55:18,266
But I was just, uh-
just changed to go home.
750
00:55:18,336 --> 00:55:22,568
And, um, then I thought
I'd take this final call.
751
00:55:22,640 --> 00:55:25,370
Oh, great. If you don't mind,
I would like something too.
752
00:55:25,443 --> 00:55:28,003
Could you bring me up some
really, really cold water?
753
00:55:28,079 --> 00:55:30,479
I'll see what I can do.
754
00:55:30,548 --> 00:55:34,985
- Still, not sparkling.
- Absolutely. Ice-cold still water.
755
00:55:35,052 --> 00:55:38,488
Unless it's illegal in the U.K. to serve
beverages below room temperature.
756
00:55:38,556 --> 00:55:42,458
I wouldn't want you going to jail
just to satisfy my whim, now.
757
00:55:42,526 --> 00:55:45,689
- No, I'm sure it's
fine. - Thank you. - I-
758
00:55:45,763 --> 00:55:49,824
Hey, one more thing. Could you adios these
dirty dishes and take out that trash too?
759
00:55:52,837 --> 00:55:54,771
- Uh-
- Right.
760
00:55:54,839 --> 00:55:57,273
No. No. Um, don't- don't-
don't do that.
761
00:55:57,341 --> 00:55:59,707
I don't think
it's his job to clear.
762
00:55:59,777 --> 00:56:04,009
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
What's your name, man?
763
00:56:05,282 --> 00:56:07,216
Bernie.
764
00:56:07,284 --> 00:56:09,514
Oh, listen, Bernie.
765
00:56:09,587 --> 00:56:12,886
Thank you.
I really appreciate it.
766
00:56:12,957 --> 00:56:14,891
Hey, you.
767
00:56:19,296 --> 00:56:24,233
So, tell me. Tell me, tell me.
Good surprise or nasty surprise?
768
00:56:24,301 --> 00:56:27,134
- Good surprise.
- Oh, you're such a liar.
769
00:56:27,204 --> 00:56:29,638
She hates surprises.
Hey, what are you gonna order?
770
00:56:29,707 --> 00:56:32,642
- Huh?
- From him. What are you gonna order?
771
00:56:32,710 --> 00:56:34,974
Um, I haven't decided yet.
772
00:56:35,046 --> 00:56:37,207
Oh, well, don't overdo it.
773
00:56:37,281 --> 00:56:41,308
I don't want people saying, "There goes that
famous actor with the big, fat girlfriend."
774
00:56:43,621 --> 00:56:45,714
I should leave.
775
00:56:51,929 --> 00:56:55,387
This is a fairly strange reality
to be faced with.
776
00:56:56,734 --> 00:56:58,668
I'm so sorry.
777
00:57:01,405 --> 00:57:03,703
I don't know...
778
00:57:03,774 --> 00:57:06,072
what to say.
779
00:57:06,143 --> 00:57:08,407
Well,
780
00:57:08,479 --> 00:57:10,640
I think, um,
781
00:57:10,715 --> 00:57:13,912
"good-bye" is traditional.
782
00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:18,859
- Come on.
783
00:59:18,929 --> 00:59:21,830
- Open up.
784
00:59:21,899 --> 00:59:25,626
This is me.
Spikey.
785
00:59:27,171 --> 00:59:31,403
I'm in contact with some quite
important spiritual vibrations.
786
00:59:33,077 --> 00:59:36,911
Come on.
Hit me with it.
787
00:59:40,651 --> 00:59:43,552
- There's this girl-
- Aha.
788
00:59:43,621 --> 00:59:47,421
See, I been gettin' a female vibe.
Good.
789
00:59:47,491 --> 00:59:50,119
Speak on, dear friend.
790
00:59:50,194 --> 00:59:52,754
She's someone who...
791
00:59:52,830 --> 00:59:55,924
can't be mine, and, uh,
792
00:59:58,135 --> 01:00:03,596
it's as if I've taken love heroin,
and now I can't ever have it again.
793
01:00:03,674 --> 01:00:06,905
I've opened Pandora's box
and there's trouble inside.
794
01:00:06,977 --> 01:00:08,911
Mmm.
795
01:00:10,981 --> 01:00:13,472
Yeah.
796
01:00:13,550 --> 01:00:18,154
Tricky.
797
01:00:20,391 --> 01:00:23,622
I knew a girl at school
called Pandora.
798
01:00:26,463 --> 01:00:29,523
Never got to see her box or-
799
01:00:29,600 --> 01:00:31,534
Right.
800
01:00:31,602 --> 01:00:35,299
Right. Thanks. That's very helpful.
801
01:00:37,074 --> 01:00:40,669
You didn't know
she had a boyfriend?
802
01:00:40,744 --> 01:00:43,235
No. No.
803
01:00:43,313 --> 01:00:45,247
Why? Did you?
804
01:00:46,817 --> 01:00:48,978
Oh, bloody hell.
I don't believe it.
805
01:00:49,053 --> 01:00:53,217
My whole life ruined because
I don't read Hello magazine.
806
01:00:53,290 --> 01:00:57,090
Let's face facts.
This was always a no-win situation.
807
01:00:58,562 --> 01:01:01,087
Anna's... a goddess.
808
01:01:01,165 --> 01:01:04,225
You know what happens to mortals
who get involved with the gods.
809
01:01:04,301 --> 01:01:07,099
- Buggered, is it?
- Every time.
810
01:01:07,171 --> 01:01:12,074
But don't despair. I think I have
the solution to your problems.
811
01:01:12,142 --> 01:01:14,872
- Really?
- Mm-hmm. Her name is Tessa.
812
01:01:14,945 --> 01:01:16,810
She works in the Contracts Department.
813
01:01:16,880 --> 01:01:20,179
The hair, I admit,
is unfashionably frizzy,
814
01:01:20,250 --> 01:01:24,243
but she's bright as a button and kisses
like a nymphomaniac on death row.
815
01:01:24,321 --> 01:01:26,585
Apparently.
816
01:01:29,126 --> 01:01:31,754
Now... try.
817
01:01:34,832 --> 01:01:36,993
I got completely lost.
818
01:01:37,067 --> 01:01:39,763
It's very difficult, isn't it? Everything's
got the word "Kensington" in it.
819
01:01:39,837 --> 01:01:43,204
Kensington Park Road. Kensington Garden.
Kensington bloody Park Garden.
820
01:01:43,273 --> 01:01:45,798
- Tessa, this is Bella, my wife.
- Hello.
821
01:01:45,876 --> 01:01:47,969
- You're in a wheelchair.
- That's right.
822
01:01:48,045 --> 01:01:50,479
And this is William.
823
01:01:50,547 --> 01:01:52,879
- Hello, William.
- Hi.
824
01:01:52,950 --> 01:01:56,010
- Max has told me everything about you.
- Has he?
825
01:01:56,086 --> 01:01:58,714
Oh, yes.
You are a naughty boy.
826
01:01:58,789 --> 01:02:01,121
- Wine?
- Oh, yes, please.
827
01:02:01,191 --> 01:02:03,216
Come on, Willie.
Let's get sloshed.
828
01:02:03,293 --> 01:02:05,318
- Red or white?
- Red.
829
01:02:08,031 --> 01:02:10,363
Keziah.
830
01:02:11,869 --> 01:02:15,134
- Some woodcock?
- No, thank you. I'm a fruitarian.
831
01:02:15,205 --> 01:02:17,571
Ah.
832
01:02:19,109 --> 01:02:21,907
What is a fruitarian, exactly?
833
01:02:21,979 --> 01:02:25,813
We believe that
fruits and vegetables have feelings,
834
01:02:25,883 --> 01:02:28,181
so we think cooking is cruel.
835
01:02:28,252 --> 01:02:32,245
We only eat things that have actually
fallen from the tree or bush,
836
01:02:32,322 --> 01:02:34,517
that are, in fact, dead already.
837
01:02:36,326 --> 01:02:40,592
Ah. Oh, right.
838
01:02:40,664 --> 01:02:42,598
Right.
839
01:02:42,666 --> 01:02:44,861
So, um, these carrots?
840
01:02:44,935 --> 01:02:47,563
- Have been murdered, yes.
- Murdered.
841
01:02:49,106 --> 01:02:52,234
Poor old carrots.
That's-
842
01:02:52,309 --> 01:02:54,243
That's beastly.
843
01:02:57,614 --> 01:03:00,708
Delicious coffee.
844
01:03:00,784 --> 01:03:03,309
I'm sorry about the lamb.
845
01:03:03,387 --> 01:03:08,154
No. I thought it was...
really, you know, interesting.
846
01:03:08,225 --> 01:03:11,285
Interesting means inedible.
847
01:03:11,361 --> 01:03:14,797
Really inedible. Yes, you're right.
848
01:03:17,534 --> 01:03:21,300
Well, maybe we'll meet again.
849
01:03:21,371 --> 01:03:25,068
Yeah, yeah.
That would be, uh-
850
01:03:25,142 --> 01:03:27,076
be great.
851
01:03:34,618 --> 01:03:36,552
Bye.
852
01:03:55,639 --> 01:03:58,130
Well?
853
01:03:58,208 --> 01:04:00,142
Perfect.
854
01:04:00,210 --> 01:04:02,405
Absolutely perfect.
855
01:04:04,882 --> 01:04:07,749
And?
856
01:04:07,818 --> 01:04:11,584
I think you've forgotten
what an unusual situation you two have.
857
01:04:13,757 --> 01:04:18,194
To find someone you actually... love,
who'll love you.
858
01:04:18,262 --> 01:04:21,129
The chances are always minuscule.
859
01:04:22,599 --> 01:04:24,533
Look at me.
860
01:04:24,601 --> 01:04:29,163
Apart from the American, I've only
loved two girls, both total disasters.
861
01:04:29,239 --> 01:04:31,298
- That's not fair.
- One of them marries me, then leaves me...
862
01:04:31,375 --> 01:04:34,401
faster than you can say
"Indiana Jones."
863
01:04:34,478 --> 01:04:37,914
And the other- who seriously
ought to have known better-
864
01:04:37,981 --> 01:04:39,972
casually marries my best friend.
865
01:04:40,050 --> 01:04:44,180
- She still loves you, though.
- In a depressingly asexual way.
866
01:04:46,323 --> 01:04:48,553
I never fancied you much, actually.
867
01:04:48,625 --> 01:04:52,186
Oh, God.
868
01:04:52,262 --> 01:04:55,925
I loved you.
You were terribly funny, but...
869
01:04:55,999 --> 01:04:58,297
all that kissing my ears.
870
01:04:58,368 --> 01:05:01,030
I don't believe it.
This is just getting worse.
871
01:05:01,104 --> 01:05:03,800
I shall find myself 30 years from now
still sitting on this sofa.
872
01:05:05,375 --> 01:05:09,141
- Do you wanna stay?
- Yeah. Why not?
873
01:05:09,212 --> 01:05:11,976
All that awaits me at home
is a masturbating Welshman.
874
01:05:16,086 --> 01:05:18,145
Here we go.
875
01:05:18,221 --> 01:05:20,155
- Good night.
- Night.
876
01:05:39,248 --> 01:05:41,307
- See you.
- Right.
877
01:05:49,658 --> 01:05:52,024
Guilty.
Very, very guilty.
878
01:05:52,094 --> 01:05:54,028
So it seems.
879
01:06:41,510 --> 01:06:44,104
Hi.
880
01:06:45,748 --> 01:06:47,978
Can I come in?
881
01:06:48,050 --> 01:06:49,984
Come in.
882
01:06:57,259 --> 01:07:00,387
They were taken years ago.
883
01:07:00,462 --> 01:07:03,397
I know it was-
884
01:07:03,465 --> 01:07:08,095
But I was poor and-
It happens a lot.
885
01:07:08,170 --> 01:07:10,536
That's not an excuse.
I just-
886
01:07:13,175 --> 01:07:16,338
But to make matters worse,
887
01:07:16,412 --> 01:07:19,643
it now appears as though...
888
01:07:19,715 --> 01:07:23,742
someone was filming me as well.
889
01:07:23,819 --> 01:07:27,550
So what was a stupid
photo shoot...
890
01:07:27,623 --> 01:07:29,921
now looks like a porn film.
891
01:07:32,428 --> 01:07:35,488
The pictures have been sold
and they're just...
892
01:07:35,564 --> 01:07:37,498
everywhere.
893
01:07:40,803 --> 01:07:43,067
I didn't know where to go.
894
01:07:45,574 --> 01:07:47,508
The hotel's surrounded.
895
01:07:51,747 --> 01:07:55,046
I know it's been months, but-
896
01:07:55,117 --> 01:07:57,483
This is the place.
897
01:07:59,855 --> 01:08:02,119
Thank you.
898
01:08:05,327 --> 01:08:07,761
I'm just in London...
899
01:08:07,830 --> 01:08:10,697
for two days,
but what with your papers,
900
01:08:10,766 --> 01:08:13,701
it's the worst place to be.
901
01:08:13,769 --> 01:08:17,637
These pictures are just so horrible,
and they're so grainy.
902
01:08:17,706 --> 01:08:19,640
It makes me look like-
903
01:08:19,708 --> 01:08:21,733
Don't think about it.
904
01:08:24,079 --> 01:08:26,343
We'll sort it out.
905
01:08:29,284 --> 01:08:33,653
What would you like?
Tea?
906
01:08:33,722 --> 01:08:35,656
Bath?
907
01:08:39,695 --> 01:08:42,892
A bath would be great.
908
01:08:45,033 --> 01:08:46,967
Oh, Christ alive!
909
01:08:51,673 --> 01:08:54,039
Brilliant. Fantastic.
910
01:08:57,546 --> 01:08:59,673
Magnificent.
911
01:09:06,188 --> 01:09:08,122
You must be Spike.
912
01:09:21,804 --> 01:09:25,331
- Hi.
- Just...
913
01:09:25,407 --> 01:09:27,341
checkin'.
914
01:09:32,147 --> 01:09:34,081
Thank you, God.
915
01:09:37,920 --> 01:09:40,411
I'm really sorry about last time.
916
01:09:40,489 --> 01:09:42,855
- Oh-
- He just flew in.
917
01:09:42,925 --> 01:09:44,859
- I had no idea.
- All right.
918
01:09:44,927 --> 01:09:49,523
In fact, I had no idea
if he was ever gonna fly in again.
919
01:09:49,598 --> 01:09:52,726
It's not often one
has the opportunity to adios...
920
01:09:52,801 --> 01:09:55,668
the plates of
a major Hollywood film star.
921
01:09:55,737 --> 01:09:58,262
It was, um-
It was thrilling for me.
922
01:10:01,977 --> 01:10:03,911
So how is he?
923
01:10:06,014 --> 01:10:07,948
I don't know.
924
01:10:10,752 --> 01:10:12,686
It just got to the point...
925
01:10:12,754 --> 01:10:16,212
where I couldn't remember
any of the reasons why we were together.
926
01:10:17,526 --> 01:10:19,460
And you and love?
927
01:10:22,030 --> 01:10:25,193
Oh, well, there's a question, um,
928
01:10:25,267 --> 01:10:27,792
without an interesting answer.
929
01:10:31,940 --> 01:10:33,874
I have thought about you.
930
01:10:35,911 --> 01:10:39,039
- Oh.
- It's just that...
931
01:10:39,114 --> 01:10:42,641
anytime I've tried to keep...
932
01:10:42,718 --> 01:10:46,552
anything normal
with a person that was...
933
01:10:46,622 --> 01:10:48,817
normal,
it's just been a disaster.
934
01:10:48,891 --> 01:10:53,225
Listen, I appreciate that.
Absolutely.
935
01:10:53,295 --> 01:10:56,287
So what is that,
a film you're doing?
936
01:10:56,365 --> 01:11:00,495
Um, start in L.A. on Tuesday.
937
01:11:00,569 --> 01:11:03,595
Would you like me to
take you through your lines?
938
01:11:03,672 --> 01:11:06,800
Would you?
'Cause it's all talk, talk, talk.
939
01:11:06,875 --> 01:11:09,036
Hand it over.
940
01:11:10,312 --> 01:11:14,009
Right.
Um, basic plot?
941
01:11:14,082 --> 01:11:17,108
I'm a difficult but brilliant
junior officer...
942
01:11:17,185 --> 01:11:22,088
who in about 20 minutes is gonna
save the world from nuclear disaster.
943
01:11:22,157 --> 01:11:24,421
Mm-hmm. Okay.
Well done, you.
944
01:11:24,493 --> 01:11:26,757
"Message from Command. Would you
like them to send in the H.K.s?"
945
01:11:26,828 --> 01:11:29,854
No. Turn over four T.R.S.s
and tell them we need radar feedback...
946
01:11:29,932 --> 01:11:31,866
before the K.F.T.s return at 1900.
947
01:11:31,934 --> 01:11:35,563
Then inform the Pentagon we'll need
Black Star cover from 1000 through 1215.
948
01:11:35,637 --> 01:11:39,596
And if you say one word about how many mistakes
I made in that speech, I'll pelt you with olives.
949
01:11:39,675 --> 01:11:42,269
- Very well, Captain. I'll pass that on straightaway.
- Thank you.
950
01:11:42,344 --> 01:11:44,278
- How many mistakes did I make?
- Eleven.
951
01:11:44,346 --> 01:11:48,612
- Damn it. And Wainwright-
- Cartwright.
952
01:11:48,684 --> 01:11:50,879
Cartwright, Wainwright,
whatever your name is,
953
01:11:50,953 --> 01:11:52,887
I promised little Jimmy
I'd be home for his birthday,
954
01:11:52,955 --> 01:11:55,446
so could you get a message to him
that I may be late.
955
01:11:55,524 --> 01:11:57,719
Certainly.
And, uh, little Johnny?
956
01:11:57,793 --> 01:12:00,193
- My son's name is Johnny?
- Yep.
957
01:12:00,262 --> 01:12:02,958
- Then get a message to him too.
- I'll do what I can, Captain,
958
01:12:03,031 --> 01:12:04,965
but I can't promise anything.
959
01:12:05,033 --> 01:12:09,732
And Cartwright goes.
960
01:12:09,805 --> 01:12:13,935
- What do you think?
- Gripping. It's not Jane Austen.
961
01:12:14,009 --> 01:12:16,978
It's not Henry James,
but it's... gripping.
962
01:12:17,045 --> 01:12:20,811
- Think I should do Henry James instead?
- You would be brilliant.
963
01:12:20,882 --> 01:12:26,252
But this writer- writers-
they're pretty damn good too.
964
01:12:26,321 --> 01:12:28,915
You never get anyone
on Wings of the Dove saying,
965
01:12:28,991 --> 01:12:31,789
"Inform the Pentagon
we need Black Star cover."
966
01:12:31,860 --> 01:12:33,794
For me the book is the poorer for it.
967
01:12:39,067 --> 01:12:41,501
I can't believe you have that picture.
968
01:12:43,071 --> 01:12:45,505
You like Chagall?
969
01:12:45,574 --> 01:12:50,273
I do. It feels like
how love should be-
970
01:12:50,345 --> 01:12:53,075
floating through a dark blue sky.
971
01:12:53,148 --> 01:12:55,844
With a goat, playing a violin.
972
01:12:55,917 --> 01:12:57,851
Well, yes.
973
01:12:57,919 --> 01:13:01,013
Happiness isn't happiness
without a violin-playing goat.
974
01:13:22,126 --> 01:13:24,060
You have big feet.
975
01:13:26,731 --> 01:13:30,895
Yes.
Yes, always have had.
976
01:13:32,737 --> 01:13:36,332
You know what they say
about men with big feet.
977
01:13:37,608 --> 01:13:39,667
No.
What's that?
978
01:13:39,744 --> 01:13:43,407
Uh, big feet,
979
01:13:43,600 --> 01:13:44,900
large...
980
01:13:45,600 --> 01:13:46,600
...shoes.
981
01:13:51,990 --> 01:13:53,924
The thing that is so irritating...
982
01:13:53,992 --> 01:13:57,359
is that now I'm so fierce
when it comes to nudity clauses.
983
01:13:57,428 --> 01:14:00,158
You actually have... clauses
in your contract about nudity?
984
01:14:00,231 --> 01:14:02,165
Definitely.
985
01:14:02,233 --> 01:14:05,828
"You may show the dent of the top of the
artist's buttocks, but neither cheek."
986
01:14:05,903 --> 01:14:09,134
Or if there's
a stunt bottom being used...
987
01:14:09,207 --> 01:14:12,176
"artist must have full consultation."
988
01:14:12,243 --> 01:14:17,442
- You have a stunt bottom?
- I could have a stunt bottom, yes.
989
01:14:17,515 --> 01:14:21,952
Are people tempted to go
for better bottoms than their own?
990
01:14:22,020 --> 01:14:24,648
Yeah. I would.
This is important stuff.
991
01:14:24,722 --> 01:14:28,715
It's one hell of a job, isn't it?
What do you put on your passport?
992
01:14:28,793 --> 01:14:31,193
"Profession: Mel Gibson's bottom."
993
01:14:31,262 --> 01:14:33,457
Actually, Mel does his own ass work.
994
01:14:33,531 --> 01:14:35,499
- Right.
- Why wouldn't he?
995
01:14:35,566 --> 01:14:39,662
- Absolutely.
- It's delicious.
996
01:14:39,737 --> 01:14:43,070
What, the ice cream
or Mel Gibson's bottom?
997
01:14:43,141 --> 01:14:46,008
Both. Equally.
998
01:14:46,077 --> 01:14:48,705
But you wouldn't necessarily lick both?
999
01:14:48,780 --> 01:14:53,114
Well, this is tart.
1000
01:14:53,184 --> 01:14:55,379
And fuzz-free.
1001
01:14:59,457 --> 01:15:02,085
And, uh-
1002
01:15:02,160 --> 01:15:04,822
Bedroom.
There's clean sheets.
1003
01:15:14,739 --> 01:15:17,333
Today's been a good day,
1004
01:15:17,408 --> 01:15:20,343
which in the circumstances is...
1005
01:15:20,411 --> 01:15:23,209
unexpected.
1006
01:15:23,281 --> 01:15:25,545
Thank you.
1007
01:15:29,120 --> 01:15:32,214
Anyway, um,
1008
01:15:32,290 --> 01:15:34,258
time for bed.
1009
01:15:35,426 --> 01:15:37,360
Or sofa bed.
1010
01:15:43,734 --> 01:15:47,737
Good night.
1011
01:16:33,351 --> 01:16:35,285
Oh, my God.
1012
01:16:43,427 --> 01:16:45,861
Hello?
1013
01:16:45,930 --> 01:16:47,864
Hello.
1014
01:16:49,600 --> 01:16:53,195
- Spike.
- I wonder if I could have a little word.
1015
01:16:53,271 --> 01:16:56,604
- Right.
- I don't want to interfere or anything,
1016
01:16:56,674 --> 01:16:59,336
but she's just split up
from her boyfriend, right?
1017
01:16:59,410 --> 01:17:03,210
- Maybe.
- And she's in your house.
1018
01:17:04,715 --> 01:17:08,207
- Yes.
- And you get on very well.
1019
01:17:09,921 --> 01:17:12,651
- Yes.
- Well, isn't this, perhaps,
1020
01:17:12,723 --> 01:17:14,782
a nice opportunity to...
1021
01:17:18,563 --> 01:17:20,497
slip her one.
1022
01:17:20,565 --> 01:17:22,533
Spike, for God's sakes.
She's in trouble. Get a grip.
1023
01:17:22,600 --> 01:17:25,262
You think it's the wrong moment.
Fair enough.
1024
01:17:30,441 --> 01:17:32,409
- Do you mind if I have a go?
- Spike!
1025
01:17:32,476 --> 01:17:35,377
- Okay.
- I'll talk to you in the morning.
1026
01:17:35,446 --> 01:17:40,179
Okay.
Might be too late, but okay.
1027
01:17:49,994 --> 01:17:53,725
Please, sod off.
1028
01:17:53,798 --> 01:17:55,732
- Okay. All right.
- No. No, no!
1029
01:17:55,800 --> 01:17:59,600
Wait! I thought you were,
um, someone else.
1030
01:18:01,339 --> 01:18:05,105
I thought you were Spike.
I'm thrilled that you're not.
1031
01:19:06,671 --> 01:19:08,605
Wow.
1032
01:19:10,908 --> 01:19:12,842
What?
1033
01:19:12,910 --> 01:19:14,844
Nothing.
1034
01:19:49,980 --> 01:19:52,676
It does strike me as,
1035
01:19:52,750 --> 01:19:56,481
well, surreal that I'm allowed
to see you naked.
1036
01:19:56,554 --> 01:19:59,523
- You and every person in this country.
- I'm sorry.
1037
01:20:01,058 --> 01:20:03,720
What is it about men and nudity, huh?
1038
01:20:03,794 --> 01:20:05,728
Particularly breasts.
1039
01:20:05,796 --> 01:20:10,495
- How can you be so interested in them?
- Well-
1040
01:20:10,568 --> 01:20:13,128
But, seriously,
they're just breasts.
1041
01:20:13,204 --> 01:20:16,037
Every second person
in the world has them.
1042
01:20:16,107 --> 01:20:19,838
More than that, when you think about it.
Meat Loaf has a very nice pair.
1043
01:20:19,910 --> 01:20:23,368
But they're odd-looking.
1044
01:20:23,447 --> 01:20:26,245
They're for milk.
Your mother has them.
1045
01:20:26,317 --> 01:20:29,844
You've seen a thousand of them.
What's all the fuss about?
1046
01:20:29,920 --> 01:20:33,185
Actually, I can't think
what it is, really.
1047
01:20:33,257 --> 01:20:35,851
Let me just have a quick look.
1048
01:20:40,498 --> 01:20:43,490
Nope, nope. Beats me.
1049
01:20:46,604 --> 01:20:50,131
Rita Hayworth used to say,
1050
01:20:50,207 --> 01:20:53,938
"They go to bed with Gilda,
they wake up with me."
1051
01:20:54,011 --> 01:20:59,142
- Who was Gilda?
- Her most famous part.
1052
01:20:59,216 --> 01:21:02,185
Men went to bed with the dream,
1053
01:21:02,253 --> 01:21:05,916
and they didn't like it
when they woke up with the reality.
1054
01:21:07,491 --> 01:21:09,425
Do you feel that way?
1055
01:21:12,163 --> 01:21:15,860
You are lovelier this morning
than you have ever been.
1056
01:21:19,570 --> 01:21:21,504
I'll be right back.
1057
01:21:35,119 --> 01:21:37,053
Breakfast in bed.
1058
01:21:37,121 --> 01:21:41,490
- Oh.
- Or it's brunch or lunch or something.
1059
01:21:41,559 --> 01:21:44,289
My God.
1060
01:21:44,361 --> 01:21:46,295
Can I stay a bit longer?
1061
01:21:49,066 --> 01:21:51,000
Stay forever.
1062
01:21:53,537 --> 01:21:55,801
Okay.
Oh. Forgot the jam.
1063
01:22:00,144 --> 01:22:02,510
I'll get the jam,
you get the door.
1064
01:22:18,340 --> 01:22:20,205
Jesus Christ.
1065
01:22:22,978 --> 01:22:25,378
What?
1066
01:22:25,447 --> 01:22:27,779
What is it?
1067
01:22:27,849 --> 01:22:30,818
- Nothing, really.
- You're up to something.
1068
01:22:30,886 --> 01:22:33,787
Anna, no, please!
1069
01:22:36,325 --> 01:22:41,126
My God. And they got a picture of you
dressed like that.
1070
01:22:41,196 --> 01:22:42,925
Yes.
1071
01:22:44,800 --> 01:22:46,734
Undressed like this, yeah.
1072
01:22:48,570 --> 01:22:52,199
- Morning, darling ones.
- It's me. The press are here.
1073
01:22:52,274 --> 01:22:54,504
No, there are hundreds of them.
1074
01:22:54,576 --> 01:22:57,204
My brilliant plan
was not so brilliant. I know.
1075
01:22:57,279 --> 01:23:00,578
I know. I know.
Just get over here.
1076
01:23:00,649 --> 01:23:02,583
Damn it.
1077
01:23:07,756 --> 01:23:10,816
- Um, I wouldn't go outside.
- Why not?
1078
01:23:13,462 --> 01:23:16,124
- Just take my word for it.
- Oh.
1079
01:23:38,687 --> 01:23:40,882
How did I look?
Not bad.
1080
01:23:40,956 --> 01:23:44,983
Not at all bad.
Well-chosen briefs, I'd say.
1081
01:23:45,060 --> 01:23:47,722
Chicks love gray.
1082
01:23:47,796 --> 01:23:50,458
Nice firm buttocks.
1083
01:23:54,436 --> 01:23:56,370
How are you doing?
1084
01:23:56,438 --> 01:23:59,032
How do you think I'm doing?
1085
01:24:00,442 --> 01:24:02,706
- I don't know what happened.
- I do.
1086
01:24:02,778 --> 01:24:07,715
Your furry friend thought he'd make
a buck telling the papers where I was.
1087
01:24:07,783 --> 01:24:09,717
- That's not true.
- Really?
1088
01:24:09,785 --> 01:24:13,118
The entire British press got up this morning
and thought, "I know where Anna Scott is.
1089
01:24:13,188 --> 01:24:16,123
She's in that house with the blue door
in Notting Hill."
1090
01:24:16,191 --> 01:24:18,955
Then you go out
in your goddamn underwear!
1091
01:24:19,027 --> 01:24:22,019
- I went out in my goddamn underwear too.
- Get out!
1092
01:24:22,097 --> 01:24:24,156
Sorry.
1093
01:24:24,232 --> 01:24:28,066
- I'm so sorry.
- This is such an unbelievable mess.
1094
01:24:28,136 --> 01:24:31,071
I come to you to protect myself
against more crappy gossip,
1095
01:24:31,139 --> 01:24:33,073
and now I've landed in it
all over again.
1096
01:24:33,141 --> 01:24:35,974
For God's sake, I've got a boyfriend!
1097
01:24:36,044 --> 01:24:39,775
- You have?
- As far as they're concerned I do.
1098
01:24:39,848 --> 01:24:44,717
And now, tomorrow there'll be pictures of
you in every newspaper from here to Timbuktu!
1099
01:24:44,786 --> 01:24:47,755
I know that, but...
just let's stay calm.
1100
01:24:47,823 --> 01:24:51,589
You stay calm! This is a perfect
situation for you, isn't it?
1101
01:24:51,660 --> 01:24:54,026
Minimum input, maximum publicity.
1102
01:24:54,096 --> 01:24:56,690
Everywhere you go, people will say,
"Well done, you.
1103
01:24:56,765 --> 01:25:00,565
You slept with that actress.
We saw the pictures."
1104
01:25:00,635 --> 01:25:03,399
- That is spectacularly unfair.
- That's yours.
1105
01:25:03,472 --> 01:25:05,406
Maybe it'll even help business.
1106
01:25:05,474 --> 01:25:08,068
Buy a boring book about Egypt
from the guy that screwed Anna Scott.
1107
01:25:08,143 --> 01:25:11,943
Stop! Stop! I beg you!
1108
01:25:12,013 --> 01:25:14,277
Calm down.
How about a cup of tea?
1109
01:25:14,349 --> 01:25:16,408
I don't want
a goddamn cup of tea.
1110
01:25:17,819 --> 01:25:20,481
I just wanna go home.
1111
01:25:20,555 --> 01:25:23,319
Spike, see who that is,
and put some clothes on, for God's sake.
1112
01:25:23,391 --> 01:25:26,053
Looks like a chauffeur to me.
1113
01:25:26,128 --> 01:25:28,562
Spike owes you
an expensive dinner or holiday,
1114
01:25:28,630 --> 01:25:31,656
depending who's got the brains
to get the going rate on betrayal.
1115
01:25:31,733 --> 01:25:33,667
That is not true.
Wait a minute.
1116
01:25:33,735 --> 01:25:36,431
This is crazy behavior.
1117
01:25:36,505 --> 01:25:39,770
Can't we just
laugh about all this?
1118
01:25:39,841 --> 01:25:43,572
Seriously. In the huge sweep of things,
this stuff doesn't matter.
1119
01:25:43,645 --> 01:25:46,842
What he's gonna say next is
there's people starving in the Sudan.
1120
01:25:46,915 --> 01:25:50,681
Well, there are, and we don't
have to go anywhere near that far.
1121
01:25:50,752 --> 01:25:53,687
My best friend slipped down stairs,
cracked her back...
1122
01:25:53,755 --> 01:25:56,315
and she's in a wheelchair
for the rest of her life.
1123
01:25:56,391 --> 01:26:00,760
All I'm asking for is
a normal amount of perspective.
1124
01:26:00,829 --> 01:26:03,320
You're right.
Of course, you're right.
1125
01:26:03,398 --> 01:26:06,196
It's just that I've dealt
with this garbage for ten years.
1126
01:26:06,268 --> 01:26:08,202
You've had it for ten minutes.
1127
01:26:08,270 --> 01:26:11,728
Our perspectives are very different.
1128
01:26:11,807 --> 01:26:15,334
Today's newspapers will be lining
tomorrow's wastepaper bin.
1129
01:26:15,410 --> 01:26:17,537
- Excuse me?
- You know.
1130
01:26:17,612 --> 01:26:19,807
It's just one day.
1131
01:26:19,881 --> 01:26:23,476
Tomorrow, today's papers
will all have been thrown out.
1132
01:26:23,552 --> 01:26:25,713
You really don't get it.
1133
01:26:25,787 --> 01:26:28,221
This story will be filed.
1134
01:26:28,290 --> 01:26:33,193
Every time anyone writes anything
about me, they'll dig up these photos.
1135
01:26:33,261 --> 01:26:35,252
Newspapers last forever.
1136
01:26:35,330 --> 01:26:38,197
I'll regret this forever.
1137
01:26:40,302 --> 01:26:42,236
Right.
1138
01:26:45,540 --> 01:26:47,906
Right.
1139
01:26:47,976 --> 01:26:50,240
I will feel the opposite,
1140
01:26:50,312 --> 01:26:54,442
if that's okay by you, and, uh,
1141
01:26:54,516 --> 01:26:57,508
always be glad that you...
came to stay.
1142
01:27:00,055 --> 01:27:02,956
But, um, you're probably right.
1143
01:27:03,024 --> 01:27:04,958
You better go.
1144
01:27:45,667 --> 01:27:47,897
Was it you?
1145
01:27:50,272 --> 01:27:55,073
I may have told a few people
down at the pub.
1146
01:27:56,878 --> 01:27:58,812
Right.
1147
01:29:48,490 --> 01:29:52,259
Have I got something for you. Something
which will make you love me so much,
1148
01:29:52,327 --> 01:29:55,660
you will want to hug me every day
for the rest of my life.
1149
01:29:55,730 --> 01:29:58,665
Blimey. What is it?
1150
01:29:58,733 --> 01:30:00,928
Phone number of Anna Scott's agent
in London...
1151
01:30:01,002 --> 01:30:03,527
and her agent in New York.
1152
01:30:07,415 --> 01:30:10,816
Listen, you think about her all
the time. Now you can ring her.
1153
01:30:10,886 --> 01:30:14,413
Yeah. Brilliant. Thanks.
1154
01:30:14,489 --> 01:30:17,481
I'll see you tonight.
Hey, Marty. Ooh! Sexy cardi.
1155
01:30:43,618 --> 01:30:47,918
Shh! Hello!
I have a little speech to make.
1156
01:30:47,989 --> 01:30:52,892
I won't stand up because
I can't... be bothered.
1157
01:30:52,961 --> 01:30:57,728
Exactly a year ago today, this man here
started the finest restaurant in London.
1158
01:30:57,799 --> 01:30:59,733
- Hear, hear.
- Thank you very much.
1159
01:30:59,801 --> 01:31:02,361
Unfortunately,
no one ever came to eat here.
1160
01:31:02,437 --> 01:31:05,270
It's a tiny hiccup.
1161
01:31:05,340 --> 01:31:08,639
And so we have to face the fact
that from next week,
1162
01:31:08,710 --> 01:31:10,644
we must find somewhere new to eat.
1163
01:31:12,013 --> 01:31:16,347
I just want to say to Tony...
don't take it personally.
1164
01:31:16,418 --> 01:31:20,252
The more I think about things, the more
I see no rhyme or reason in life.
1165
01:31:20,322 --> 01:31:23,985
No one knows why some things work out
and some things don't.
1166
01:31:24,059 --> 01:31:25,890
Why some of us get lucky...
1167
01:31:25,961 --> 01:31:29,124
- and some of us-
- Get fired.
1168
01:31:29,197 --> 01:31:30,528
- What?
- No!
1169
01:31:30,599 --> 01:31:33,363
Yeah, well, it seems
they're shifting the whole outfit...
1170
01:31:33,435 --> 01:31:36,029
much more towards
the emerging markets.
1171
01:31:36,104 --> 01:31:40,734
And, of course, well,
I was total crap, so-
1172
01:31:40,809 --> 01:31:43,073
A toast to Bernie- the worst
stockbroker in the whole world.
1173
01:31:43,144 --> 01:31:45,874
I thank you.
And Tony, the worst restauranteur.
1174
01:31:45,947 --> 01:31:48,541
- Tony and Bernie. Both crap...
- The terrible two.
1175
01:31:48,617 --> 01:31:51,245
in their own special ways.
1176
01:31:54,022 --> 01:31:56,456
Since it's an evening
of announcements,
1177
01:31:56,524 --> 01:31:59,925
uh, I've also got one.
1178
01:31:59,995 --> 01:32:03,226
Um, I've decided to get engaged.
1179
01:32:03,298 --> 01:32:08,702
I've found myself a nice,
slightly odd-looking bloke...
1180
01:32:08,770 --> 01:32:12,001
who I know is gonna make me happy
for the rest of my life.
1181
01:32:13,675 --> 01:32:16,337
Wait a sec. I mean, I-
1182
01:32:16,411 --> 01:32:20,438
I'm your brother. I don't know
anything about this. Is he-
1183
01:32:20,515 --> 01:32:24,076
Is he financially viable?
1184
01:32:24,152 --> 01:32:26,814
He's an artist...
with brilliant prospects.
1185
01:32:29,391 --> 01:32:32,519
- This is a secret you've been keeping from me.
- No, I swear!
1186
01:32:32,594 --> 01:32:34,619
By the way, it's you.
1187
01:32:37,966 --> 01:32:41,163
- Me?
- What do you think?
1188
01:32:43,004 --> 01:32:44,938
Well, yeah.
1189
01:32:47,500 --> 01:32:49,340
Groovy.
1190
01:32:50,800 --> 01:32:53,643
Excuse me.
Are there any more announcements?
1191
01:32:55,100 --> 01:32:56,800
Well, actually, yes.
1192
01:32:57,000 --> 01:32:59,252
I feel I should
apologize to everyone...
1193
01:32:59,320 --> 01:33:01,720
for my behavior
over the last six months.
1194
01:33:01,790 --> 01:33:05,419
I have, as you know,
been somewhat down in the mouth.
1195
01:33:05,493 --> 01:33:09,054
There's an understatement.
There are dead people on better form.
1196
01:33:09,130 --> 01:33:12,861
But I just wish to make it clear
that I've turned a corner,
1197
01:33:12,934 --> 01:33:17,030
and, um, henceforward intend
to be impressively happy.
1198
01:33:23,011 --> 01:33:26,913
Without a love of my own
1199
01:33:30,919 --> 01:33:35,185
- Blue moon
- Ba-boom, ba-boom
1200
01:33:35,256 --> 01:33:38,692
You knew just what I was there for
1201
01:33:38,760 --> 01:33:41,661
Oh, God. I'm horribly drunk.
1202
01:33:41,730 --> 01:33:44,824
You heard me saying a prayer for
1203
01:33:44,899 --> 01:33:46,958
- Come here.
- Ba-boom, ba-boom
1204
01:33:47,035 --> 01:33:50,232
Someone I really could care for
1205
01:33:50,305 --> 01:33:54,639
- So you've laid the ghost?
- Wah, wah, wah, wah
1206
01:33:54,709 --> 01:33:56,609
I believe I have.
1207
01:33:56,678 --> 01:34:00,045
Don't give a damn
about the famous girl?
1208
01:34:00,115 --> 01:34:01,912
No.
1209
01:34:01,983 --> 01:34:04,781
No, I don't think I do.
1210
01:34:04,853 --> 01:34:07,754
Which means you won't be distracted
by the fact that she's back in London...
1211
01:34:07,822 --> 01:34:09,483
grasping her Oscar...
1212
01:34:09,557 --> 01:34:12,583
and currently to be found filming,
most days, on Hampstead Heath.
1213
01:34:14,429 --> 01:34:16,363
Oh, God, no.
1214
01:34:19,634 --> 01:34:22,432
So not over her, in fact.
1215
01:35:05,980 --> 01:35:08,881
- Can I help you?
- Yeah, I'm, um-
1216
01:35:08,950 --> 01:35:11,350
- I'm looking for Anna Scott.
- Does she know you're coming?
1217
01:35:11,419 --> 01:35:14,911
No. No, uh, she doesn't.
1218
01:35:14,989 --> 01:35:18,288
- I'm afraid I can't let you through.
- Right.
1219
01:35:18,359 --> 01:35:23,353
I mean, I am actually a friend.
I'm not a lunatic, but-
1220
01:35:23,431 --> 01:35:26,298
- No, you basically, er-
- Can't let you through, sir.
1221
01:36:08,243 --> 01:36:09,710
Well, this is, uh-
1222
01:36:09,777 --> 01:36:13,144
I only found out
you were here yesterday.
1223
01:36:13,214 --> 01:36:16,980
- I was going to call, but I-
- Uh, Anna.
1224
01:36:17,051 --> 01:36:19,519
Yes. Um-
1225
01:36:19,587 --> 01:36:22,021
Things aren't going very well,
and it's our last day.
1226
01:36:22,090 --> 01:36:24,524
Absolutely, yeah.
You're clearly very busy.
1227
01:36:24,592 --> 01:36:27,026
But if- if you could wait,
1228
01:36:27,095 --> 01:36:29,757
there are... things to say.
1229
01:36:34,235 --> 01:36:36,169
Okay.
1230
01:36:38,106 --> 01:36:41,007
Drink tea.
There's lots of tea.
1231
01:36:47,448 --> 01:36:49,382
Come and have a look.
1232
01:36:53,755 --> 01:36:56,918
Are you a fan of Henry James?
1233
01:36:56,991 --> 01:36:59,721
- This is a Henry James film?
- Yeah.
1234
01:37:06,968 --> 01:37:09,198
This is, uh, Harry.
1235
01:37:09,270 --> 01:37:12,467
He'll give you a pair of headphones
so you can hear the dialogue.
1236
01:37:12,540 --> 01:37:14,474
- Thank you very much.
- No problem.
1237
01:37:14,542 --> 01:37:17,204
- Hi.
- Hi. Here we go.
1238
01:37:17,278 --> 01:37:20,770
- Volume's on the side. Have a seat.
- Thank you.
1239
01:37:28,990 --> 01:37:32,448
We are living in cloud cuckoo land.
We'll never get this done today.
1240
01:37:32,527 --> 01:37:34,791
We've got to.
I have to be in New York on Thursday.
1241
01:37:34,862 --> 01:37:39,060
Oh, stop showing off.
God, that's an enormous ass.
1242
01:37:39,133 --> 01:37:43,331
- I'm not listening.
- But seriously, it's not fair.
1243
01:37:43,404 --> 01:37:45,736
So many tragic young teenagers
with anorexia...
1244
01:37:45,807 --> 01:37:48,435
and that girl has an ass
she could perfectly well share around...
1245
01:37:48,509 --> 01:37:52,411
with at least ten other women
and still be big-bottomed.
1246
01:37:52,480 --> 01:37:54,971
I would think, looking at
something nice like that,
1247
01:37:55,049 --> 01:37:59,247
you and your...
bony little excuse for an arse...
1248
01:37:59,320 --> 01:38:01,254
would be well advised to keep quiet.
1249
01:38:01,322 --> 01:38:03,494
Now down to business.
The end of the scene.
1250
01:38:03,562 --> 01:38:06,759
Um, I ask you when you're
telling everyone, and you say-
1251
01:38:06,832 --> 01:38:10,996
Um, tomorrow will be soon enough.
1252
01:38:11,069 --> 01:38:13,503
And then I- Right. Okay.
1253
01:38:13,572 --> 01:38:17,406
Say, who was that rather diffident chap
I saw you talking to round the back?
1254
01:38:17,476 --> 01:38:19,410
No one.
1255
01:38:20,812 --> 01:38:23,838
Just some guy from the past. I-
1256
01:38:23,915 --> 01:38:27,851
It's a bit of an awkward situation.
I don't know what he's doing here.
1257
01:38:44,970 --> 01:38:46,904
'Course.
1258
01:38:52,677 --> 01:38:55,771
Thanks. I've got to, um-
1259
01:38:55,847 --> 01:38:57,781
Any time.
1260
01:39:07,359 --> 01:39:10,795
Ladies and gentlemen,
can we have you on your first marks?
1261
01:39:10,862 --> 01:39:12,989
On your first marks!
1262
01:39:25,110 --> 01:39:28,443
Uh, I-I do hate to disturb you
whilst you're cooking the books,
1263
01:39:28,513 --> 01:39:31,710
but, uh, there's a delivery for you.
1264
01:39:31,783 --> 01:39:34,149
Martin, really.
Can't you just do it yourself?
1265
01:39:34,219 --> 01:39:38,747
But you see, this is not for the shop.
This is for you.
1266
01:39:39,824 --> 01:39:41,416
Right. Okay.
1267
01:39:41,493 --> 01:39:46,192
Tell me, if I employ a wet rag, would I
have to pay it as much as I pay you?
1268
01:39:50,368 --> 01:39:53,201
Hi.
1269
01:39:53,271 --> 01:39:55,364
Hello.
1270
01:39:55,440 --> 01:39:57,567
You disappeared.
1271
01:39:57,642 --> 01:40:00,270
Yeah. Yeah. Um-
1272
01:40:00,345 --> 01:40:04,213
I had to leave.
I didn't want to disturb.
1273
01:40:04,282 --> 01:40:08,275
- How have you been?
- Fine, fine. Everything much the same.
1274
01:40:08,353 --> 01:40:12,449
When they change the law,
Spike and I will marry immediately.
1275
01:40:12,524 --> 01:40:15,584
Whereas you, I've watched in wonder.
1276
01:40:15,660 --> 01:40:17,890
- Awards, glory.
- Oh, no.
1277
01:40:17,963 --> 01:40:21,399
It's- It's all nonsense, believe me.
1278
01:40:21,466 --> 01:40:24,435
I'd no idea how much nonsense
it was, but...
1279
01:40:24,502 --> 01:40:26,436
nonsense it all is.
1280
01:40:28,607 --> 01:40:31,075
Well, um-
1281
01:40:31,142 --> 01:40:36,170
Yesterday was our last day of filming,
so... I'm leaving.
1282
01:40:38,316 --> 01:40:41,774
But, um-
1283
01:40:41,853 --> 01:40:45,482
I brought this for you from home,
1284
01:40:45,557 --> 01:40:47,787
so I thought I'd give it to you.
1285
01:40:49,227 --> 01:40:52,162
Thank you.
1286
01:40:52,230 --> 01:40:54,164
Shall I-
1287
01:40:54,232 --> 01:40:56,826
Oh, no, don't open it now.
I'll be embarrassed.
1288
01:40:59,671 --> 01:41:03,072
Well, thank you. I don't know
what it's for, but thanks anyway.
1289
01:41:03,141 --> 01:41:07,635
Actually, I had it in my apartment,
and I thought you'd-
1290
01:41:10,015 --> 01:41:12,813
But when it came to it,
I didn't know how to call,
1291
01:41:12,884 --> 01:41:15,978
having behaved so badly.
1292
01:41:16,054 --> 01:41:17,988
Twice.
1293
01:41:19,591 --> 01:41:23,755
So it's just been
sitting in the hotel.
1294
01:41:23,828 --> 01:41:28,162
Then you came and... I figured-
1295
01:41:31,803 --> 01:41:34,169
The thing is-
1296
01:41:34,239 --> 01:41:36,173
The thing is-
1297
01:41:38,943 --> 01:41:41,844
What? What is the thing?
1298
01:41:43,081 --> 01:41:45,413
Don't even think about it.
Go away immediately.
1299
01:41:45,483 --> 01:41:48,145
- Go away.
- Right.
1300
01:41:48,219 --> 01:41:50,153
Sorry.
1301
01:41:52,424 --> 01:41:54,858
You were saying?
1302
01:41:57,362 --> 01:42:00,820
Yes.
1303
01:42:00,899 --> 01:42:03,732
I have to go away today, but I...
1304
01:42:03,802 --> 01:42:07,101
wondered if I didn't...
1305
01:42:07,172 --> 01:42:11,575
whether you might
let me see you a little,
1306
01:42:11,643 --> 01:42:14,510
or... a lot, maybe.
1307
01:42:17,782 --> 01:42:20,683
See if you could like me again.
1308
01:42:20,752 --> 01:42:23,186
But yesterday
that actor asked you who I was,
1309
01:42:23,254 --> 01:42:26,018
and you just
dismissed me out of hand.
1310
01:42:27,392 --> 01:42:30,486
I heard.
1311
01:42:30,562 --> 01:42:33,759
You had a microphone.
I had headphones.
1312
01:42:33,832 --> 01:42:35,823
You expect me
to tell the truth about my life...
1313
01:42:35,900 --> 01:42:38,494
to the most indiscreet man
in England?
1314
01:42:39,938 --> 01:42:42,270
Uh, excuse me.
1315
01:42:42,340 --> 01:42:44,774
It's your mother on the phone.
1316
01:42:47,545 --> 01:42:49,672
Will you tell her
I'll ring her back?
1317
01:42:49,748 --> 01:42:52,842
I've actually tried that tack, but
she said you've said that once before,
1318
01:42:52,917 --> 01:42:54,885
and it's now been about 24 hours...
1319
01:42:54,953 --> 01:42:58,389
and the foot that was purple
is now sort of blackish in color and-
1320
01:42:58,456 --> 01:43:02,222
Right, right. Yeah.
Perfect timing, as ever.
1321
01:43:04,396 --> 01:43:07,194
Martin, hold the fort a second.
1322
01:43:07,265 --> 01:43:09,631
Uh, yes. All right.
1323
01:43:14,773 --> 01:43:17,298
Um, could I just say-
1324
01:43:17,375 --> 01:43:22,438
I thought Ghost
was the most wonderful film.
1325
01:43:23,681 --> 01:43:26,343
- Is that right?
- Oh, yes.
1326
01:43:29,554 --> 01:43:33,456
Um, I've always wondered...
1327
01:43:33,525 --> 01:43:36,722
what Patrick Swayze's like
in- in- in real life.
1328
01:43:36,795 --> 01:43:40,458
I can't say that I know Patrick
all that well.
1329
01:43:40,532 --> 01:43:42,796
He wasn't that friendly during filming?
1330
01:43:42,867 --> 01:43:48,305
Well, I'm sure he was friendly to
Demi Moore who acted with him in Ghost.
1331
01:43:50,775 --> 01:43:53,141
Oh. Oh, right.
1332
01:43:53,211 --> 01:43:55,145
Sorry.
1333
01:43:56,781 --> 01:44:00,046
Always been a bit of an ass.
1334
01:44:00,118 --> 01:44:03,087
Um, anyway- Um-
1335
01:44:03,154 --> 01:44:05,088
Well, it was lovely to meet you.
1336
01:44:05,156 --> 01:44:07,590
I'm a huge, huge fan of yours.
1337
01:44:07,659 --> 01:44:11,288
And Demi's, of course.
1338
01:44:13,798 --> 01:44:16,028
Sorry.
1339
01:44:16,100 --> 01:44:17,965
That's fine.
1340
01:44:18,036 --> 01:44:21,836
There's always a pause when the jury
goes out to consider their verdict.
1341
01:44:24,108 --> 01:44:27,271
Anna, look, um-
1342
01:44:27,345 --> 01:44:31,145
I'm a fairly levelheaded bloke,
1343
01:44:31,216 --> 01:44:35,084
not often in and out of love.
1344
01:44:35,153 --> 01:44:37,280
But, uh-
1345
01:44:41,826 --> 01:44:44,226
Can I just say no to your...
1346
01:44:44,295 --> 01:44:48,629
kind request and, uh, leave it at that?
1347
01:44:52,036 --> 01:44:55,369
Yes.
1348
01:44:55,440 --> 01:44:58,967
Fine. Of course. I-
1349
01:44:59,043 --> 01:45:01,102
Of course.
1350
01:45:02,814 --> 01:45:05,874
I'll just be going, then.
It was nice to see you.
1351
01:45:05,950 --> 01:45:08,885
The thing is,
1352
01:45:08,953 --> 01:45:12,411
with you I'm in real... danger.
1353
01:45:12,490 --> 01:45:15,687
It seems like a... perfect situation,
1354
01:45:15,760 --> 01:45:19,218
apart from that
foul temper of yours, but...
1355
01:45:19,297 --> 01:45:23,859
my relatively inexperienced heart
would, I fear, not...
1356
01:45:23,935 --> 01:45:26,733
recover, uh, if I was...
1357
01:45:26,804 --> 01:45:30,865
once again cast aside,
as I would absolutely expect to be.
1358
01:45:30,942 --> 01:45:36,107
There are just too many pictures of you,
too many films.
1359
01:45:36,180 --> 01:45:39,547
You'd go and I'd be, uh,
1360
01:45:39,617 --> 01:45:42,245
well, buggered, basically.
1361
01:45:43,755 --> 01:45:46,690
That really is a real no, isn't it?
1362
01:45:46,758 --> 01:45:51,457
I live in Notting Hill.
You live in... Beverly Hills.
1363
01:45:51,529 --> 01:45:53,463
Everyone in the world
knows who you are.
1364
01:45:53,531 --> 01:45:57,262
My mother has trouble
remembering my name.
1365
01:45:57,335 --> 01:45:59,269
Fine.
1366
01:46:01,139 --> 01:46:05,473
Fine. Good decision.
Good decision.
1367
01:46:09,180 --> 01:46:12,707
The fame thing isn't really real,
you know?
1368
01:46:16,521 --> 01:46:20,150
And don't forget I'm-
1369
01:46:20,224 --> 01:46:24,024
I'm also just a girl...
1370
01:46:24,095 --> 01:46:28,259
standing in front of a boy...
1371
01:46:28,333 --> 01:46:30,893
asking him to love her.
1372
01:46:41,779 --> 01:46:43,713
Good-bye.
1373
01:47:06,082 --> 01:47:08,516
So what do you think?
Good move?
1374
01:47:08,584 --> 01:47:10,882
Yeah, good move.
1375
01:47:10,953 --> 01:47:13,649
I mean, when all's said and done,
she's nothing special.
1376
01:47:13,723 --> 01:47:15,657
I saw her taking her trousers down,
1377
01:47:15,725 --> 01:47:18,592
and I definitely glimpsed
some cellulite down there.
1378
01:47:18,661 --> 01:47:21,494
Good decision, yeah.
1379
01:47:21,564 --> 01:47:23,998
All actresses are as mad as snakes.
1380
01:47:24,067 --> 01:47:27,127
- Tones, what do you reckon?
- Never met her, never want to.
1381
01:47:27,203 --> 01:47:30,934
- Brilliant. Max?
- Absolutely. Never trust a vegetarian.
1382
01:47:31,007 --> 01:47:33,737
Great. Thanks. Brilliant.
1383
01:47:35,044 --> 01:47:37,569
I was called and I came. What's up?
1384
01:47:37,647 --> 01:47:39,808
William's just turned down Anna Scott.
1385
01:47:41,451 --> 01:47:44,352
You daft prick.
1386
01:47:44,420 --> 01:47:47,821
No, no.
No, no, it's actually quite sensible.
1387
01:47:51,160 --> 01:47:54,926
That painting
isn't the original, is it?
1388
01:47:54,997 --> 01:47:57,591
Um, you know,
I think it might be, yeah.
1389
01:48:00,503 --> 01:48:02,869
But she said
she wanted to go out with you.
1390
01:48:05,408 --> 01:48:08,343
- Yeah.
- Well, that's nice.
1391
01:48:09,912 --> 01:48:13,006
What?
1392
01:48:13,082 --> 01:48:15,243
Well, you know,
1393
01:48:15,318 --> 01:48:19,448
anyone saying they wanna go out with you
is pretty great, isn't it?
1394
01:48:25,228 --> 01:48:27,924
It was...
1395
01:48:27,997 --> 01:48:30,261
sort of... sweet, actually.
1396
01:48:30,333 --> 01:48:33,268
Um, I mean,
I know she's an actress and all that...
1397
01:48:33,336 --> 01:48:39,241
so she can... deliver a line, but, um,
1398
01:48:39,308 --> 01:48:41,833
she said she might be
as famous as she can be,
1399
01:48:41,911 --> 01:48:44,778
but also that she was...
1400
01:48:44,847 --> 01:48:48,180
just a girl...
1401
01:48:48,251 --> 01:48:52,620
standing in front of a boy...
1402
01:48:52,688 --> 01:48:55,156
asking him... to love her.
1403
01:49:10,273 --> 01:49:13,709
Oh, sod a dog. I've made
the wrong decision, haven't I?
1404
01:49:15,745 --> 01:49:17,610
Yeah.
1405
01:49:17,680 --> 01:49:20,615
Max, how fast is your car?
1406
01:49:20,950 --> 01:49:24,249
Hey
1407
01:49:24,320 --> 01:49:28,120
- Good luck!
- If anyone gets in our way, we have small nuclear devices.
1408
01:49:28,191 --> 01:49:30,056
- Where to?
- All I can think is The Ritz.
1409
01:49:30,126 --> 01:49:32,720
- Where's Bella?
- She's not coming.
1410
01:49:32,795 --> 01:49:35,992
- Oh, sod that. Bernie, in the back.
- What?
1411
01:49:43,100 --> 01:49:43,900
- Come on, babe.
1412
01:49:53,300 --> 01:49:54,300
- Which way are you going?
1413
01:49:54,800 --> 01:49:56,812
Down Kensington Church Street, then
Knightsbridge, then Hyde Park Corner.
1414
01:49:56,886 --> 01:49:59,548
- No, crazy. Go along Bayswater.
- That's right. Then Park Lane.
1415
01:49:59,622 --> 01:50:01,681
No, straight down to the Cromwell Road,
then left.
1416
01:50:01,757 --> 01:50:03,748
No!
1417
01:50:05,161 --> 01:50:08,824
Stop right there!
I will decide the route. All right?
1418
01:50:08,898 --> 01:50:11,128
Sorry, Max.
1419
01:50:11,200 --> 01:50:14,135
James Bond never has to put up
with this sort of shit.
1420
01:50:14,203 --> 01:50:17,866
Well, I feel so good
Everything is soundin' hot
1421
01:50:17,940 --> 01:50:21,137
You better take it easy
'cause the place is on fire
1422
01:50:21,210 --> 01:50:23,770
Turn right!
1423
01:50:23,846 --> 01:50:25,336
- I can't. It's one way.
- Do a U-turn.
1424
01:50:25,414 --> 01:50:28,178
Oh, sod it. Hold on.
1425
01:50:34,056 --> 01:50:37,253
Brilliant!
1426
01:50:44,500 --> 01:50:45,500
- Bloody hell, this is fun!
1427
01:50:45,550 --> 01:50:47,334
- Hey
- Sorry.
1428
01:50:47,403 --> 01:50:49,701
Hi.
Is Miss Scott staying here?
1429
01:50:49,772 --> 01:50:53,173
- No, sir.
- How 'bout Miss Flintstone?
1430
01:50:53,242 --> 01:50:56,268
- No, sir.
- Uh, Bambi?
1431
01:50:56,345 --> 01:50:59,473
- No, sir.
- Or, um-
1432
01:50:59,549 --> 01:51:03,679
I don't know.
Beavis or Butt-head?
1433
01:51:03,753 --> 01:51:06,586
No, sir.
1434
01:51:06,656 --> 01:51:09,318
Thanks. Thanks.
1435
01:51:09,392 --> 01:51:12,020
There was a Miss Pocahontas,
1436
01:51:12,094 --> 01:51:14,722
but she checked out
about an hour ago.
1437
01:51:14,797 --> 01:51:17,527
I believe she's holding
a press conference at the Savoy...
1438
01:51:17,600 --> 01:51:20,660
before flying to America.
1439
01:51:24,974 --> 01:51:26,908
We have liftoff.
1440
01:51:36,018 --> 01:51:38,009
You have message for Takiama?
1441
01:51:38,087 --> 01:51:40,248
I'll just check, sir.
1442
01:52:03,379 --> 01:52:05,745
Bugger this for a bunch of bananas.
1443
01:52:10,052 --> 01:52:13,783
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Stay there! Go! Go!
1444
01:52:13,856 --> 01:52:17,121
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hang on!
1445
01:52:17,193 --> 01:52:20,219
Come on! No! Wait! Wait there!
1446
01:52:20,296 --> 01:52:22,423
Come on! Come on! Wait!
1447
01:52:22,498 --> 01:52:25,661
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Go on!
Through, through!
1448
01:52:27,303 --> 01:52:29,863
You're my hero!
1449
01:52:29,939 --> 01:52:31,873
Whoa! Down boy.
1450
01:52:53,400 --> 01:52:54,400
- Excuse me.
- Yes.
1451
01:52:54,900 --> 01:52:56,262
- Where's the press conference, please?
1452
01:52:56,332 --> 01:52:59,460
- Are you an accredited member of the press?
- Yep.
1453
01:53:01,003 --> 01:53:05,463
- There you go.
- That's a Blockbuster Video membership card, sir.
1454
01:53:05,541 --> 01:53:08,669
That's right.
I work for their in-house magazine.
1455
01:53:08,744 --> 01:53:11,008
- Movies Are Our Business.
- I'm sorry, sir.
1456
01:53:11,080 --> 01:53:13,571
- He's with me.
- And you are?
1457
01:53:13,649 --> 01:53:17,983
Writing an article on how London hotels
treat people in wheelchairs.
1458
01:53:18,988 --> 01:53:22,151
Yes, of course, madam.
It's in the Lancaster Room.
1459
01:53:22,224 --> 01:53:24,658
Though I'm afraid you're rather late.
1460
01:53:24,727 --> 01:53:26,661
Run!
1461
01:53:41,977 --> 01:53:45,811
Does this mean that Miss Scott
will not be publicizing her next film?
1462
01:53:45,881 --> 01:53:48,111
No, it absolutely
does not mean that.
1463
01:53:48,184 --> 01:53:50,379
She'll be abiding by
all her present commitments.
1464
01:53:50,453 --> 01:53:54,355
She just won't be making
any more for the next year.
1465
01:53:54,423 --> 01:53:56,516
When will the film be released?
1466
01:53:56,592 --> 01:53:58,890
At the moment,
the plan is to release in America...
1467
01:53:58,961 --> 01:54:00,895
towards the end of the autumn,
1468
01:54:00,963 --> 01:54:04,261
and over here around Christmas
or early in the new year.
1469
01:54:04,335 --> 01:54:06,428
Right! Dominic.
1470
01:54:06,504 --> 01:54:09,667
Anna, how much longer are you
staying in the U.K., then?
1471
01:54:09,741 --> 01:54:11,675
No time at all.
I leave tonight.
1472
01:54:11,743 --> 01:54:16,680
Which is why we have to round things
up now, so final questions, please.
1473
01:54:16,748 --> 01:54:18,443
Yes. Lady there.
1474
01:54:18,516 --> 01:54:21,383
Is your decision to take
a year off anything to do...
1475
01:54:21,452 --> 01:54:24,717
with the rumors about Jeff
and his present leading lady?
1476
01:54:24,789 --> 01:54:28,225
- Absolutely not.
- Do you believe the rumors?
1477
01:54:28,293 --> 01:54:32,161
Well, it's really
not my business anymore.
1478
01:54:32,230 --> 01:54:37,031
Though I will say, from my experience,
rumors about Jeff do tend to be true.
1479
01:54:39,737 --> 01:54:43,730
Yeah. The last time you were here, there
were some fairly graphic photographs...
1480
01:54:43,808 --> 01:54:47,835
taken of you
with a young English guy.
1481
01:54:47,912 --> 01:54:51,040
So, uh, what happened there?
1482
01:54:51,115 --> 01:54:54,516
He was just a friend.
We're still friends, I think.
1483
01:54:54,586 --> 01:54:57,817
Right, um-
1484
01:54:57,889 --> 01:55:00,289
Yes. Gentleman in the pink shirt.
1485
01:55:05,964 --> 01:55:10,492
Yes. Miss Scott,
1486
01:55:10,568 --> 01:55:13,002
are there any circumstances in which...
1487
01:55:13,071 --> 01:55:16,006
the two of you...
1488
01:55:16,074 --> 01:55:19,237
might be more than just good friends?
1489
01:55:21,012 --> 01:55:25,779
I hoped there would be, but no,
I'm... assured there aren't.
1490
01:55:25,850 --> 01:55:29,411
- But what would you say if-
- Sorry. Just the one question, please.
1491
01:55:29,487 --> 01:55:32,081
No, it's all right.
You were saying.
1492
01:55:33,825 --> 01:55:36,885
I was just wondering if,
1493
01:55:36,961 --> 01:55:40,727
it turned out that this person, ...
1494
01:55:40,798 --> 01:55:42,766
Thacker. His name was Thacker.
1495
01:55:42,834 --> 01:55:44,961
Thanks, thanks.
1496
01:55:45,036 --> 01:55:47,698
I just wondered whether if...
1497
01:55:47,772 --> 01:55:51,731
Mr. Thacker realized he'd been
a daft prick...
1498
01:55:54,178 --> 01:55:57,614
and got down on his knees and...
begged you to reconsider,
1499
01:55:57,682 --> 01:56:01,448
whether you would, in fact, then...
1500
01:56:01,519 --> 01:56:03,578
reconsider?
1501
01:56:13,097 --> 01:56:16,260
Yes, I believe I would.
1502
01:56:18,469 --> 01:56:21,563
That's very good news.
Um-
1503
01:56:23,007 --> 01:56:26,443
The readers of Horse & Hound
will be absolutely delighted.
1504
01:56:33,318 --> 01:56:36,810
Right. Uh, Dominic, if you'd
like to ask your question again?
1505
01:56:36,888 --> 01:56:42,292
Yeah? Anna, how long are you
intending to stay here in Britain?
1506
01:56:50,167 --> 01:56:52,835
Indefinitely.
1507
01:57:16,200 --> 01:57:17,090
- What happened?
1508
01:57:18,400 --> 01:57:19,129
- It was good.
1509
01:57:20,000 --> 01:57:23,052
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