All language subtitles for Zombiegeddon 2003

[Music playing]

[Inaudible]

My name is Uwe Boll.

I'm the director of
"House of the Dead"

And "Alone in the Dark."

I just saw Chris
Watson's "Zombiegeddon,"

And I want to tell you,
don't watch that movie.

Don't look at that movie at all.

It's not worth to pay $1
to rent it or whatever.

And I must "Zombiegeddon"
is a piece of shit.

Don't take it.

Don't use it.

And don't go in connection
with that movie basically.

Stay away from that movie.

Like, I, as a filmmaker...
I stay away from that movie

So far as I can.

Thank you very much.

Ted Copperfield reporting
live from Tempe, Arizona

Where we are receiving
reports that "Zombiegeddon" is

A huge fucking piece of shit.

Now while we cannot confirm
nor deny this ourselves,

We can quote one viewer
who said, it's horrible.

It's tragic.

It's dog shit.

It's worse than that.

I'm going to go home now
and shoot myself in the face

In order to erase the memories
of this movie from my brain

Forever.

Why would normal people spend
good money on a horrible piece

Of shit like this?

Well, we have Dr.
Sean Easthoff with us

From the Columbia
Institute of Retardation

To help answer that question.

Doc?

Uh, yes, Ted.

Glad to be a part of your show.

Doctor, what is it
about "Zombiegeddon"

That it makes so bad?

Well, Ted, "Zombiegeddon"
is an affront to everything

That is good in the world.

It's a vial, sickening,
disgusting piece of shit.

Can I say that... shit?

You just did.

OK, then.

So it's fucking horrible.

The acting was bad,
the director sucks ass,

And the producers apparently
had their heads up their asses.

Doctor, is there
anything good that you

Can say about this picture?

Only that it's not
longer and that it

Doesn't star Ashton Kutcher.

Thank you, doctor.

Well, there you have it.

"Zombiegeddon" is a huge,
steaming pile of excrement.

Now I'm back to you, fuckface.

[White noise]

[Moaning]

LAURA: Oh, yeah!

Oh, yeah!

[Moaning]

That was the best
sex I ever had.

[Sighing]

Yeah.

That was my favorite
kind of sex.

What kind would that be?

Oh, you know, the kinds
you don't have to pay for.

Color me surprised.

Well, what in dad's name
is that supposed to mean?

You know, you... you say that as
if you think that I'm crazy.

How old are you?

33.

You're 33 years old.

And you believe
you're Jesus Christ?

I thought that we had
been through all that.

I am Jesus.

And after all
we've been through,

I would think that you'd
be used to that by now.

We went through a fucking
nightmare together.

If I ever see shit
like that again,

I'll save them the trouble
and just kill myself.

Mm-mm.

Don't do that, Laura.

Don't do that.
Don't do that.

Why?

Would you miss me?

Mm, no.
No.

It's not that.

It's just that there's
only certain things

That I could forgive.

Suicide is... is not one of them.

Well, it's been real
and it's been fun.

But it hasn't been real fun.

What the hell is
that supposed to mean?

It means I got to get
dressed and get out of here.

I'm gonna be late for work.

Why miss miss out on the
greatest sex you ever had?

Come on.

We just started.

Nothing against
you, but I gotta go.

If I'm not on the air
soon, my listeners

Will think I died or something.

Well, look at the bright side.

If you died, then we would
have eternity together.

[Sighing]

Jesus.

JESUS CHRIST: What?

I wasn't speaking to you.

I was Just taking
your name in vain.

Come on.
Look.

Stay awhile.

You know, get naked again.

We'll have some wine.

We don't have any wine.

JESUS CHRIST: We have tap water.
We have glasses.

I'm Jesus.

I can turn the water into wine.

I gotta go.

ANNOUNCER: Welcome to another
day of broadcasting for KLKG.

KLKG has proudly served and all
the towns in the surrounding

Area since 1955.

[Clearing throat]

KLKG invites you to sit back and
enjoy the Laura Reynolds Show.

Good morning, folks.

This is Laura Reynolds
coming to you live

From the middle of nowhere.

I'd like to welcome you all
to another exciting hour

Of talk radio.

With us today, we have the
dean of our esteemed community

College, Dean Kauffman.

Good morning, Laura.

As always, I'm glad to be here.

And we're glad
to have you again.

So what's new at our ever
so glamorous [inaudible]?

We don't say [inaudible].

It's community college.

Hm.

Mondays we have the art show.

And Wednesday we have the music.

And best of all, Fridays
we have square dancing.

That's fascinating.

This is all fucking bullshit.

You know what, folks?

I can't hide it anymore.

I'm sick of the dean,
the college, this piece

Of shit radio station, life.

I'm even sick of you, morons,
because I know the truth.

None of this shit
matters anymore.

None of it.

You may wonder why that is.

Because mankind will be extinct
within the next 72 hours.

[Phone ringing]

That's right, kiddies.

We're all gonna die.

[Phone ringing]

So kiss your loved
ones, have a mad orgy,

Buy that big screen
TV, start praying,

Whatever, cause it's all over.

Let's take another caller.

[Phone ringing]

Hello.
You're on the air.

PHIL: Uh.

Uh, hi.

Uh.

Uh, my name is Phil.

Howdy, Phil.

PHIL: What... what's all this
talk about the world coming

To an end and everybody dying?

Are you nuts?

It's a long story.

I heard it from a man
thought to be insane,

So only listen if
you have the time.

For centuries we've
heard about zombies,

But what we know about
zombies isn't exactly true.

Since the beginning
of man, there's

Been what we call zombies.

I've seen them myself.

And then there's a
bloodline of humans

Blessed by God who are the
only ones who can stop them.

As soon as that bloodline
dies, then the zombies

Come back and try
yet again to take

Over so that once again the
Devil may reign over the world.

Son, listen to me.

Chances are I may not make
it out of there alive.

I want you to take this.

It's a key to the truck.

If I'm not back out
of there in two hours,

I want you to take the truck and
drive to your mother's house.

Do you understand?

Come here.

God help us, so that
when you get older

You don't have to
fight these zombies.

[Music playing]

[Growling]

[Sighing]

Jeffrey, I am going
to ask your mother

To take you to a psychiatrist.

Simply, Jeffrey,
your behavior of late

Has been disruptive
and out of control.

Thinking Miss Bates is
a zombie is insanity.

And then you go around and
you stab at your classmates

With pencils thinking
they're zombies.

That's craziness.

I am referring you to
the Student Support team.

I don't think there's enough
help in this world to help you.

And then you think
that the whole world is

Gonna be overtaken by zombies.

And the first stop are schools?

[Gunshot]

[Moaning]

You just shot my
brother for no reason!

Fuck, no.

He was pulling a gun.

That's bullshit.

He doesn't even have a gun.

Oh, yeah, he's got a gun.

That is bullshit,
and you know it.

Man, my lawyer is gonna
be all over you two.

You two are so dead.

I can't wait.

[Gunshot]

Look, Cage, I know the
fucking guy was annoying, but...

You know, we need
another frame gun.

Did you bring it?

No.

[Sighing]

You know, there's a pawn
shop around the corner.

Let's just go grab
one, come back

Before the ambulance arrives.

It's all good.

All right.

So you starting to get
the hang of this thing?

Yeah.

But, you know, it
would be a little

Easier if you know what you're
doing, you know what I mean?

Yeah.

Well, just remember,
always shoot to kill.

Copy that.

[Inaudi
doorway to check us out again.

He's just an old pervert.

He doesn't mean any harm.

I don't see you get
aroused with old man

Green checking out your body.

Sweetheart, I'm in heat.

Anything and
everything looks good.

Girl, I have got to set you up.

I have so many
guys hitting on me.

Every time I see one, I
want to rip out their balls.

I'd say we're the
odd couple then.

So, you going to Robin's party?

Nah, I think I'll
study some this weekend.

Wallington's giving that
big exam on Tuesday.

Suit yourself.

See you later, girl.

See ya.

[Screaming]

(SINGING) And he
walks with me and he

Talks with me and he tells me...

[Screaming]

Whoa!

Now there will be no
females left on the planet.

Hm.

Yes.

Yes.

This is my plan.

I do not want any females.

Well, that's marvelous, master.

That's marvelous.

Although, master,
perhaps we could keep

One female to... to remember...

No more females.

No.

This is my plan.

I do not want any females.

Yes.
Yes.

But what about your friend?

Will you help,
my little friend?

Oh.

I should be able
to work things out.

LORD ZOMBIE: If
you will help me...

Yeah?

LORD ZOMBIE: we can
control this planet.

Oh!

Control the planet.

I... I... I... I have passed on
your instructions, master, just

As you told me, word for word.

And were they fulfilled?

Yes.

Yes.

All the... all the
troops are in position.

All that they await
is your command.

Well, that sounds good.

Ah, yeah.

I think we should be able
to make this thing work.

Yeah, I think so, master.

But you have to
stand by me, son.

I'll always stand by you.

You are my... my master.

But I thought perhaps maybe one?

No!

Oh!

What was I thinking?

Of course not.

Silly me.

It's a nice night, huh?

Hey, what's up, dude?

What's up?

Did you find everything
all right, man?

Yeah, I did.
Yeah.

- That's cool.
- Got "The Ozone."

That's cool.

Hey, man, check this out.

What do you think of that?
Not bad.

Not bad.

- Lesbians are pretty cool, huh?
- Yeah.

You can't miss that
girl-on-girl action.

You can't beat that.

Nope.

All right, man.

All right, man, what's
your phone number?

558-3852.

3852?

Yes.

Hey, man, I'm showing that
you got some late fees here.

Uh, it's $94, man.

It's for... for, uh, "Mob Days."

Damn, you must have had
that one for a minute.

I'll tell you what, man.

You only have to pay
half to rent all right?

So you wanna give
the man half now

No, there's got to be something
that... no, there's no way.

- I understand.
- No.

I'm gonna have to get
you to pay at least half

Of it before I can [inaudible].

But you can look at
lesbians for free, though.

There's got to
be some kind of...

VIDEO STORE EMPLOYEE:
Well, hold on.

All right.
Well, do me a favor.

Put that back on the
shelf before you leave.

[Grunting]

What the fuck?

[Screaming]

[Music playing]

Help me!

I'm going!

I'm coming!

Help me!

Homos.

Help me!

Jesus Christ, Cage, I can't
believe you didn't get any coke

From the evidence room.

Don't be so fucking, kid.

You know, we got to get
ourselves in the DEA.

That'll make our
lives 10 times better.

You don't have the slightest
idea what it takes to cut

It in the DEA, all right?

You should be happy you have
a job right here right now.

Fucking punk.

Holy shit, man!

What the fuck happened?

These cocksuckers pulled
out in front of me.

Oh, Jesus Chr... look
at this weed everywhere!

Oh, I'm gonna open up a can
of whoop ass on these fuckwads.

Fuck it, man.

They just look like some
college punks, all right?

- Uh-uh.
- Just... wait.

Just write up a [inaudible].
Let's get the fuck out of here.

No.
I'm going hot, man.

I'm taking these bastards down.

[Door slamming shut]

Why does this always have
to happen to me, dude?

How you all doing?

Um, we're all right, sit.

I was just wondering
why you pulled us over.

You all been doing
any drinking in there?

Um, no.

Smoke anything?

No.

Anything IV?

No, sir.

Mm-hm.

Any huffing?

No.

Hm.

Y'all been passing a joint
around back there, ain't ya?

No.
No, we haven't

I know I saw somebody
smoking something into there,

You know, carload full of kids.

Uh, he was smoking a cigarette.

Oh, is that right?

Yeah.

That was a mighty
quick answer, boy.

You wouldn't be lying
to me now, would you?

No, sir, I wouldn't.

Mm-hm.

You've been passing
around a doobie, ain't ya?

You've been passing
around a doobie?

Doobie?

What are you laughing at, boy?

What are you laughing at?

It's just funny how
you use the word doobie.

It was... it's kind of funny.

Mm-hm.

I see.

Well, you know, you some mighty
fine looking boys in there,

Even... even that
retarded looking bastard

Back there in the backseat.

So I tell you what I'm gonna do.

I'm gonna give you a break.

You tell me I'm the best,
and I'll let you go.

Um, you're the best.

Now come on.

Make it good.

Tell me I'm the best.

And tell me like you mean it.

Tell me you wish you was a skirt
so I'd let you suck my dick

And have my baby.

And make it good, boy.

If you know what I mean.

Sir, um, you're the best.

And I wish I could suck your
dick and have your baby.

Yeah, yeah.

I'll bet you do, junior.

I'll just bet you do.

Hey, you.

You know I could kick your ass.

I want you to tell me that I
could kick your fucking ass.

Uh, you could kick my ass.

Yeah.

Damn right.

Damn right.

All right, retardo.

It's your turn.

Kiss the psychotic
looking fucker over here.

And use the tongue, bitch.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's what I'm talking
about right there, boy.

That's what I'm looking for.

Yee-haw!

Woo-hoo!

Uh-huh.

[Grunting] [moaning] You boys
drive safe now, you hear?

Oh my god!

[Grunting] This... this will be
the safest place in the world.

What did you do?

Gave them the Buford T routine.

Oh.

Had them beg, kiss my ass.

[Laughing]

The two in the backseat
french kiss, man.

[Laughing]

Oh.

That one guy was
so fucking ugly.

God!

DISPATCHER: Car 41.

Come in, Car 41.

We have a 2-11 in progress
at 261127th Street.

Neighbors say a married
couple is having a dispute.

And there's been
lots of shouting.

And a few minutes
ago, a gun was fired.

Oh, god.

What the hell?

You pulling up the
wrong goddamn way.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Just back her down, would ya?

OK.

Jesus fucking Christ.

10-4 on that, but we're getting
kind of hungry out here.

Could you send anybody
else on that call?

Uhh, you mind if we
send another car?

DISPATCHER: There's no
one else in that area.

10-4, Car 41.

Please be advised
that shots were fired.

10-4 on that.

[Siren wailing]

Here we go.

You sick bastard.

What?

You're just trying to
get us to drink with you.

Oh, Christ.
Like it's gonna hurt you anyway.

Shut up, Harper.

All you want to do is
have sex with us anyway.

Uh, maybe cause I
don't want to masturbate

For the rest of my life.

You try getting
in the "Guinness"

Book of World Records."

I hear they give great
promotional deals.

Uh, no, they don't.

They become circus acts.

And, uh, they spend all their
fucking money on therapists

Anyway.
Why?

Do you know any?

Uh, no, I don't.

Do you?
No.

Then why the fuck are
we talking about this?

So we don't have to go back
in there and go to work.

Yeah.

Maybe one day we'll have
real jobs with real rewards.

Higher pay is all.

The money's good.

Well, only if you care
about artificial things.

What are you calling me a
money-hungry prick, or what?

Yes.

Yes, I am.

I guess you got me.

Yep, I'm the most honest
person in the world.

What, are you saying
that I'm not honest?

OK.

Look at this realistically.

If you get a house,
you need money.

You get a car, you need money.

You have a baby, you're gonna
need a shitload of money.

Money, money, money.
OK.

That's enough.

Cause, you know,
all I want to do

Is go to third-world countries
and help children anyway.

Ah, come on!

What are you gonna do?

Swim across the
fucking ocean to get

To the fucking third-world
countries, or what?

You're gonna need money to
buy the plane ticket anyway.

Oh, you are such a dick.

God!

Suck it anyway, bitch.

You used to not speak.

You should've stuck with that.

She'll fucking get over it.

Come on.

Yeah.

She'll be crying inside.

She'll get over it after I'm
inside comforting her and she

Gets some from her boyfriend.

Her boyfriend's a
fucking idiot anyway.

An idiot with a big dick.

That's more than I can say
for you, belly button dick.

Oh, belly button dick, huh?

That's why last time I talk
to her it was a tree trunk!

[Sighing]

[Siren wailing]

[Dog barking]

You fucking slut!

I cannot believe
you did that to me!

I can't believe you called
the fucking [inaudible]

About this stuff!

Do not take another step!

Whoa, there, cowboy.

Just back it down a notch.

Let's cool off and
talk about this.

I'm just a
doughnut-eating dickhead

Who got the unlucky call.

I'm not here to spoil your fun.

He beat the shit out
of me, and then he

Says he's gonna kill me
with that gun he bought

This morning [inaudible].

Does that bother you, ma'am?

All right then.

So, what do you
say we call it in

And, uh, go get some breakfast?

Oh, jeez, I left
the [inaudible].

Master, could you
tell me again the...

The story of the first zombie?

LORD ZOMBIE: Oh, yes,
I can tell you that.

Oh.

When I laid my eyes on him,
my heart was taken away.

Ah.

And I wanted nothing
more than to be a zombie.

[Grunts]

Would you like to be a zombie?

Or do you want to continue
being the idiot that you are?

Yeah.

Oh, I... I always
thought I was a...

I was kidding.

Oh!

Oh!

You... you are a zombie.

Oh, you're hugging me.

You are a zombie, my boy.

I'm you're friend.

Oh!

Thank you.

Thank you, master.

Is there anything else
that I can get for you?

I wouldn't want to
say to your head.

A little raw flash, perhaps?

Oh, how did you know?

Well, it's almost dinner time.

I'll, uh... I'll be right back.

I haven't had any
flesh for so long.

Yes.

Yes.

I'll take care of that, master.

[Laughing]

No fat!

What a trial he is.

My god.

What?

You can't kick me out of here.

I work here.

You're gonna go clean
toilets or something.

Yeah.

We'll finish putting
the books in order

Once she's done crying.

Look, I didn't mean
what I said earlier, OK?

Just go.

It'll be OK, sweetie.

[Screaming]

You zombie looking freak ass!

You ain't going
up my [inaudible].

- Hold on now.
- You ain't going up that.

I'm gonna kill you.

I'm gonna kill you.

What the fuck?

[Inaudible] homos.

I hate [inaudible].
Hold on!

What the fuck?

I saw you in that
sex education class.

You were experimenting
with being homos, man.

Well, I used to experiment too,
but... but I was only doing it

With... with farm animals.

I'll kill you! [Inaudible].

Choke you Where's that asshole?

Show me your asshole.

[Screaming]

That hurt.

I work at the
fucking bookstore.

There's inventory tonight.

What the fuck's your problem?

You ain't one of those
butt fucking homosexuals?

No.

I mean, I wouldn't
mind a female,

But obviously that's not
gonna happen right now.

[Moaning]

[Screaming]

[Screams]

I just...

Alli!

Call the fucking cops!

Oh, screw you, Harper.

Really, you could
try some acne cream.

It's not fucking acne.

Call the fucking cops.

Call the cops!

Hurry the fuck up!

It's fucking busy.

We gotta get the
hell out of here.

No shit.

This way.

Oh, I'm ready for
some good ol' grits

At the waffle house, buddy.

Yeah, for you maybe.

For me, I'm in training, man.

I'm gonna pick up some
nice looking babe.

Look, man, it's not
about your waist.

It's about your mind.

Yeah, if you're gay.

I ain't gay.

Could've fucking fooled me.

Ha ha.

Fucking ha ha.

Hey.

You suck, man.

I have been waiting so long
for grits from the house.

Man, I can't believe you were
so fucking ecstatic about going

To a place that's been shut
down for the last three months

For having rats running around.

Look, for all you
know, rat turds

Could be their secret
ingredient, all right?

Oh, man.

Oh, that's fucking gross, OK?

Though there is grosser shit
that people eat, like you.

What could be grosser
than rat turds?

I don't know.

People eat testicles, OK?

That's fucking gross...
Eating fucking testicles.

I've had testes
before, you know.

It's some pretty good
shit if it's done right.

It's not like that fucking
fried shark bullshit.

Look, Cage, for
Christ's sakes, there's

A big difference between
eating fish and testicles.

Look, you've been
fishing, right?

Yeah.

Do you remember cutting
the balls off the fish

Before you fry it up?

No.

And you eat lots of fish.

You eat fish testicles.

Man, you fucking...

- Just admit it, all right?
- No.

Do they have fucking Do
they have fucking testicles?

Well, how the
fuck would I know?

DISPATCHER: Car 41.

Car 41, we have a possibly
robbery down 10th Street.

Please be advised that the
suspect is armed and dangerous.

[Sighing]

10-4 on that, but we're
getting kind of hungry out here.

Could you send anybody
else on that call?

DISPATCHER: There's no
one else in that area.

Please be advised that the
suspect is armed and dangerous.

Here we go.

I got away from them zombies.

I got away from them.

Homosexual zombies.

I've got a hard on.

I'm getting excited.

I better call... I
better call 911.

Yeah.

That's my responsibility
to call the police.

Yes, indeed. [Grunts]

Yeah.

This is the janitor at the
Tromaville Community College.

Now we got some... no, no, I'm
not calling about a pizza.

No, no.

This is the janitor.

We got trouble here.

And the... go away now.

I'm on the phone.

[Screaming]

How'd the ex like the gift?

Fucking hated it as usual.

You know, I spent 100
bucks on that piece.

She's gonna turn around and
sell it at a garage sale

Next week for a fucking dime.

That's what I get for trying
to suck up to the bitch

So she won't charge me
so much goddamn alimony.

Well, like all
chicks, she's a bitch.

You weren't saying that last
week, man, at the nudie bar.

Oh, come on.

I got some chick
dancing on my lap

Making me spill down
in front of my pants.

She was fine, wasn't she?

Let's go back to that place.

No way.

No way.

Not until I get laid.

Wait, wait, wait.

You're swearing off the
nudie bar until you get laid?

Yeah.

Ah, you're never gonna
go back that way, dude.

No, man, come on.

I'm cleaning up my act.

I'm gonna meet a nice
girl, settle down.

She'll take care of me.
Yeah?

I just hate when
chicks cheat on me, man.

I hate that shit.
Yeah.

Hey.

What?

Let's party.

Whoa!

Stop!

[Gunshot]

[Gunshot]

Yeah.

That's one dead dude.

Uh, Cage.

Yeah?

There's just groceries
in those bags.

So?

We just killed an innocent man.

So you want to get his
wallet, or you want me to?

Man, that is too much.

I'll get it.

Well, he wasn't
nearly worth killing.

Shit, man, we ain't
nearly worth killing.

We're still alive, dude.

Jesus.

Hey, uh, let's go catch
the real fucker, huh?

What about this fucking guy?

Maybe we're gonna get pinched.

Look, we'll throw
him in the trunk.

We'll head down to Gangland.

We'll dump him.

It'll look like a drive-by.

Man.

That's too fucking much, man.

As you probably guessed
by now, Jeff and Cage

Were not your typical cops.

They smoked weed,
shot heroin, took

The lives of innocent
people, and raped

Prisoners both male and female.

But soon these
vilest of defenders

Would be called upon
to save the world.

He's a heavy son of a bitch.

He must've ate twice as much
groceries as before we had.

Come on, man.

This is... get that... get that.

Oh, geez.

DISPATCHER: Car 41.

Oh, fuck.

What's that?

DISPATCHER: Are
you there, Car 41?

Oh, Jesus.

DISPATCHER: Come in, Car 41.

Mayor here.

What do you want now?

DISPATCHER: We just got a
call that the grocer chased

Down and shot the suspect.

We need you now to check
out a possible disturbance

At the college.

Another date rape?

DISPATCHER: No.

Reported screams
in the building.

Who'd be there at this time?

DISPATCHER: The
president says there'll

Be practices finishing up.

And the janitor that
called in the disturbance

Hasn't answered the phone since.

[Sighing]

10-4.

But can you send another car?

We're fucking starving in there.

DISPATCHER: Negative.

There are no other
cars on duty today

Due to the real
mayor having a party.

Why the hell
weren't we invited?

DISPATCHER: I believe
it has something

To do with the mayor thinking
you shot his son last year.

10-4.

I wish I really had
shot the cocksucker.

We'll be there in a
couple of minutes.

Wait a minute.

Wait.

Cou... could we just stop
at Wendy's or something

And pick something up?

Hey, hey, hey.

I've been waiting for grits from
the house for too damn long.

[Siren wailing]

Move the body.

Fuck you, man.

You shot the guy.

You move the fucking body.

I shot him, so
you move the body.

That's the way it works.
No.

Fuck you, man.

What do we need
the artillery for?

Look, if there's an entire
frat raping one chick,

There's gotta be a bullet
for every frat guy.

Capisce?

Wait a minute.

You think they're gonna
catch on at every case

That we go on
somebody gets killed?

What the fuck do they care?

So as long as we don't do
anything to an innocent.

We'd get caught.

Shit.

[Screaming]

Another one.

Wait...

That door shouldn't
be unlocked... not even

At this time of day,
even if there is

A professor in there working.

Huh.

You ready?

Fucking, let's go.

Let's go.

Oh my god!

Holy mother of god!

They're gonna kill us all.

Freeze!

Hold it right there, pal.

Please.

You... you gotta stop them.

They're gonna kill us all.

What's your name, sir?

Harvey Lawson.

Well, Mr. Lawson, I think
you'd better get behind us.

I was working late,
and I heard a girl

In the locker room scream.

I went to help her.

And she was attacked.

[Gunshot]

Ew!

Man, look at his face.

How did you know?

The gym and the locker
rooms are across the street.

Besides, he's just
fucking annoying.

Look at this.

He turned from normal
looking human to this shit.

What are we dealing
with here, man?

I don't know.

That sure ain't natural.

Maybe supernatural.

Well, let's go.

Mandy!

Hey!

Get off of her!

Mandy!

Get off!

Hey, come on.

Let's just go secure the area.

And when we're done,
we'll go get the grits

From the fucking rat house.

And you'll be happy, right?
The rat house.

Very funny.
Let's just go.

You think you're gonna
get a fucking promotion

By walking around an empty...

Get the fuck out of here!

I'm putting my foot
down right here, OK?

Now listen, we have
to secure this area

And make sure that we're
taking care of this place.

Cage, come on.

Fucking little pussy.

What do you think, you're gonna
get a promotion by walking

Around an empty school?

You calling me a fucking pussy.

I just did.

And I'll do it again
if you need me to.

You won't be shit without
those fucking guns, OK?

- What are you saying?
- Cause you're fucking...

You think it's down to this?
You think it's down to this?

I know it's down to that.

Cause if you didn't
have that shit,

You wouldn't so fucking tough.
OK.

No guns.

Oh, come... let's just go, OK?

We'll go secure the area, go get
your grits from the rat house...

You put your money
where your mouth is.

You'll be happy.

OK, Mr. I gotta work
out, I gotta get chicks,

And all that kind of bullshit.

Man, let's just go, all right?

Come on.
Let's go.

- No.
- Come on, Cage.

Bring it.
Bring it.

Come on.

You want this?

The big question
is, do you want this?

Fuck you.
All right.

Let's do it.
All right.

Here we go.

Let's go.

Drop your shit.
Come on.

Let's go.
All right.

Let's go.

Now you get your
insurance paid up?

Don't bring... don't
bring that shit in here.

Oh, very nice.

Nice, huh? [Inaudible].

[Inaudible]

Wee, motherfucker.

Wee!

Good one.
Good one.

No.
Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

OK.
OK.

Are you ready for this?
Yeah, let's go.

- I'm bringing the big one.
- Bring it.

I'm bringing the big one.

Here we go.

What the...

Jesus!

Oh, jeez.

You little bastard.

Oh my god.

That's fucking gross.

Jesus Christ!

Oh, man!

Hey.

Go... go back and get the guns.

What?

Get the fucking guns.

Oh, fuck.

Bastard.

Fuck!

Oh, shit.

[Moaning]

Fuck!

Watch it, man.

Jesus!

Fuck!

[Inaudible] they're coming.

They're right there, man.
They're right there.

Let's get the fuck
out of here, man.

- They got the guns.
- [inaudible].

They've got the guns!

[Screaming]

Let's go!

Get off me!

Come on.
Let's go.

Let's go.

Come on.

Thank you.

Hey, look, we got a big
problem here, people.

A big problem.

It's true.

We tried to find a way out
and they're everywhere.

Every doorway is covered.

There's nothing.

There's no way out.

There's no way out?

Those things are gonna
kill every last one of us.

We're never gonna see our
families, our friends.

Ashley, everything
is gonna be fine.

How can you say that
when there's body parts

All over the algebra room!

How can you say that
when we saw them eating

Out Dr. Thompson's insides?

These are some pretty
sick individuals

We're dealing with here.

Ashley, everything
will be fine.

We're with the police
now... the good guys.

Everything will be OK.

Right, officer?

Everything's
gonna be just fine.

[Screaming]

Go to school,
get an education...

[Screaming]

This is not the education
that I had in mind.

Oh, I knew I should've
went to the university.

CAGE: Look, we can
beat these guys.

We can take these guys out.

All we have to do
is get [inaudible]...

Daddy!

Buddy, is everything OK?

I thought I heard something.

No, that's just
daddy doing his job.

Jeffrey, if you're
ever in trouble,

This is the house to go to.

Can I go there now?

No, Jeffrey.

I think it's time
we end this now.

Look, all we have to do is
stay together, work as a team,

And not panic.

It's gotta be safer in here.

[Screaming]

You're alive!

I couldn't leave you, could I?

Everybody else has.

Look, don't worry.

I'll get you out of here.

I'll get everybody out of here.

Well, we're not gonna get out
of here by just standing here.

So let's see if you really
can get us out of here.

Women.

Did you see how many there are?

They're everywhere.

Yeah.

They're everywhere!

We need to come up with a plan.

Jeff?

- What?
- Jeff...

- What?
- We need you, man.

I'm cool, man.
I'm cool!

I'm cool, all right?

I know a safe place.

Let's go.
OK.

Come on.

There's a shitload of
those fuckers down here.

Shit, man.

What are we gonna do?

This is the only way out.

Fuck.

All right.

Look, you ladies stay here, OK?

When the coast is clear...

Haul ass.

Good way to put it.

You ready?

Let's do it.

[Music playing]

[Groans]

[Grunting]

Oh!

Ooo.

Oh.

[Screaming]

Oh my god!

Close the door!

Close the door!

[Screaming]

[Groaning]

[Grunting]

Get the fuck off.

Oh, shit.

Whoa.

What the fuck was that?

It's a fucking
sleeper hold, man.

You lock it in like this...

No, no, no, no.

That ninja kicking
zombie bullshit.

I don't know, man.

A fucking lot going on
here more than we know.

Well, hey, can we go now?

Let's go meet up
with the chicks.

Yeah.
Come on.

Hey!

Die, motherfucker!

Die!

Die!

Die!

Die!

Die!

Are you OK?

Yeah.

Their insides, they're
like our insides.

They're fucked up
looking humans.

These... these are not humans,
I mean, they're not even humane.

Harper, they're
trying to kill us.

I mean, humans don't
do things like this.

I know.

I know.

OK.

We just need to get
the fuck out of here.

I know.

Like, I'm so ready to get the
hell out of here and go home.

This is it.

This is it.

LAURA (VOICEOVER):
Remembering his father's words

From his childhood,
Jeff led them to a place

Where he believed they
would find refuge.

And then...

[Phone ringing]

Well, what do you know?

Another loser has
decided to call in

And make his existence known.

Hello, you're on the air.

What's on your mind?

TODD: Hi.

My name is Todd.

What's up, Todd?

TODD: Is this supposed
to be a true story?

It's pretty far-fetched.

Like the song says, Todd,
you gotta have faith.

TODD: You mean to tell me
that we're supposed to believe

This story that
you may or may not

Have actually heard from
a man who may or may

Not have been Jesus Christ.

Isn't that how faith
generally works?

TODD: I guess.

But it seems difficult to
believe that these cops...

Jeff and Cage.

TODD: But, yeah.

It seems difficult to believe
that they were running around

Out there killing
all these people

And no one ever called
the cops about it.

Did I say no one had
called the police?

TODD: Well, no, but I...

Assumed?

Now, Todd, you know what
happens when you assume.

You make an ass out
of you and... only you.

TODD: But I...

It's been great
chatting with you, Todd,

But if you don't mind, I'd
like to finish my story now.

As it happens, a little girl
came upon Jeff and Cage's squad

Car earlier that
day, and she saw

The arm of their first victim
dangling out of the trunk.

After the little girl
had explained what she'd

Seen to her mother... who
was more than a little bit

Concerned... the mother
telephoned the police

Department to make an inquiry.

As it happens, the
internal affairs

Department had
been investigating

Jeff and Cage for some time.

After receiving the
report, two IAD officers

Were dispatched to the scene.

You know, this
looks like it's just

Gonna be another hoax from
some 10-year-old frikkin kid.

And you know
something... shut up.

I just wish this damn
bullet wound would heal

Already for crying out loud.

For Christ's sake.

And we left the mayor's
party for this shit?

This is goofy.

What the hell?

All right.

Let's go take a look.

Come on!

Hello?

Hello?

Maybe we're safe here
since there aren't

Any zombies running around.

They aren't exactly zombies.

So you're Jeffrey?

I've heard a great
deal about you.

How do you know my...

I'm guessing you
came here for answers.

I'll do my best to try
and answer everything.

When God created
man, as they say,

He created his own creatures.

Humans were created in heaven.

For ages, Satan tried to
rid the world of mankind.

To accomplish this, he created
his own breed of man... what

You referred to as zombies.

These zombies, if you
will, were created by Satan

To be placed in mankind.

Now they can either take
the appearance of zombies

As you see them or they
can look just like a human.

So it's a sort of alien life
form created by the devil?

You could say that.

These zombies were placed by
Satan to blend into mankind.

Now although humans
do have their faults,

They don't create the
kind of havoc and mayhem

That these creatures
have in the past.

If a disaster has been caused
by the hand of a human being,

Then you can be
guaranteed that they

Were one of Satan's soldiers.

Well, how come we haven't
heard of these things

Before if they've been around?

Oh, they have been around.

And people do know about them.

Your government
knows about them.

Many people know about them.

But they're strange and unusual.

So if a human being
tries to tell about them,

They're immediately ridiculed.

They're arrested.

They're thrown into
a mental institution.

The government doesn't know
exactly what to do about them.

If they were to
announce it, it would

Strike panic into the heart of
every citizen in the country.

Their big job is to get out
of office without a hitch.

Not be part of a
national disaster.

Americans couldn't even
handle the broadcast

Of "The War of the Worlds."

Imagine what would happen if the
President of the United States

Came out and said, there
was a new breed of man,

And it was as evil as anything
in this world that comes.

So how do we stop it?

You can't stop it.

You mean, we just
let these zombie

Alien fucks destroy
the planet and we

Don't even put up a fight?

I said you can't stop it.

But he can.

Hey.

Me?

Wait, but why me?

Do you have any recollection
of your father, Jeffrey?

Yes, of course.

Do you remember the battle
that cost him his life?

Yes.

You're part of a
bloodline, Jeffrey.

Your father did not
die in vain that night.

The two of you were alone
in the forest that day.

Chances are I may not
make it out of there alive.

I want you to take this.

It's a key to the truck.

If I'm not back out
of there in two hours,

I want you to take the truck and
drive to your mother's house.

Do you understand?

Come here.

God help us, so that
when you get older

You don't have to
fight these zombies.

GOD: On that day, your father
destroyed these creatures

And sent them back to hell.

So you're your father's son.

It was a great battle
between he and I.

Before I broke him and ate him.

So maybe you'll make it
easy on me this time.

[Grunting]

[Groaning]

You're not half the
man your father was.

Wait!

What?

You have nothing left.

I have heart.

And soon I'll have your heart.

GOD: Whenever a bloodline,
such as you and your father,

Kill the Lord of the
Creatures, all on the planet

Are forced back into hell until
the bloodline has been killed.

My father died
that day, didn't he?

His body couldn't withstand
the damage the zombie had done,

But he lived for two more days
waiting for someone to come.

No way.

No!

Jeffrey, it wasn't your fault.
You did as you were told.

There was nothing
you could have done.

However, Jeffrey, there is
something that you can do now.

What?
What?

Tell me.
Anything.

What?

You must find the current Lord
of the Zombies and kill him.

I think you know
where to find him.

Just as your father did.

Look, I am no where
near like my father, OK?

I mean, I'm not like him.

I...

I know who you are, Jeffrey.

Redeem yourself.

Those of you who love
your life will lose it.

Whoa, whoa, wait.

How do you know what
nobody else does?

Wait.

How could... oh.

He left.

He's gone.

Things just got a lot more
complicated, didn't they?

Hey, look.

You ladies stay here, OK?

You're gonna be safe here.

Safe sounds damn
good to me right now.

Cage, we're just wasting
time if we stay here.

Well, you know, Jeff, I
think it's a good day to die.

Do you really think
we're safe here?

I don't see why not.

It'll be all right.

I know.

Listen, I think all we have
to do is get some tools

And board up the windows, make
sure the doors are supported.

We just need to prepare
in case there's an attack.

I thought you said we had
nothing to worry about.

I don't think we do.

Listen, the cops said that we're
safe here so obviously we are.

Maybe they just wanted to
get rid of some dead weight.

Ashley, cops are here
to serve and protect OK?

They wouldn't leave
this behind to die.

And besides, they're out there
trying to stop this takeover.

We need to hang out
here till it blows over.

If these zombie looking
freaks broke into the college,

Why couldn't they
break into this house?

You'd think they want to dispose
of human they come across.

We're safe.

That's it.

You don't know shit, Melissa.

Shut the fuck up, Ashley.

I know cheerleaders are
supposed to be bitchy,

But this is not a
time to be a bitch.

You're still pissed I took
head cheerleader from you,

Aren't you?

You're such a whore.

You know that I just
want to get home.

Let's drop this
whole conversation.

Let's board up this place.

It's better to be
safe than sorry.

I need a drink.

You know what?

I'm gonna go get a beer.

Master!
Master!

Oh!

Master!
Master!

Master!

Master, we... we
have a situation.

We have a situation, Master.

What is the situation?

The bloodline, master.

The bloodline, he's... he's found
where we are, and he's coming!

Master, he's found
his... I'm sorry.

You don't like screaming.

He's found his god...
With a small g...

And they're coming this
way, Master, rather quickly.

Well, my father fought his
father, and my father won.

Yes!

So I think we can take
him on if he arrives.

I think that you too,
Master, shall be victorious.

Yes!

And then we... well, you
shall rule the world.

- That would be a nice situation.
- Yeah.

- [inaudible].
- Yes.

- Don't talk anymore.
- I'm sorry.

I'll be back.

Yes, of course, [inaudible].
I'm sorry, Master.

[Inaudible] come
back in a year.

I'm sorry.
Yes.

Yes, Master.

I'm sorry.
Yes.

Jesus Christ.

Ashley?

Dammit.

All right, man.

This is it right here, man.

This is where I
last saw my father.

He was right here.

Jeff, you... you gotta
let go of that, man.

I should've went in that day.

I should've went
in after him, man.

He told you to stay.

He knew what he was doing.

I should've went in there.

And I should... should've just
taken what came to me, man.

It was like... maybe I could
save him that day, you know.

Jeff, I think he knew
his destiny that day.

You...

Well, at least we're not in
that fucking college anymore.

We are now fleeing the city.

It is complete chaos here.

It... it has been confirmed
that the President and the Vice

President have been
killed by what appears

To be decayed human beings.

A new Vice President will
be sworn in at any moment.

What the fuck is this crap?

REPORTER: Members
of the Senate...

The surviving members
of the Senate...

Will set up an emergency
press conference.

There are no members of
the House still alive.

What the fuck is this crap?

Hey.

Wait, wait, wait. Wait.

What?

I can feel them.

They're here somewhere.
What?

Where?

Right here.

I can feel them.

What are we gonna do?

Let's go this way.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Groaning]

Oh, no!

Look.

Look, Master. [Inaudible].

It's the prodigy.

It... it... it's the
one who was sworn

To... to kill the... the new
leader of the master race.

Ooh.

Ooh!

Oh!

Master race?

You call yourself
the master race?

We are so much more better
than you will ever be.

We are handsomer and...
And... and the color of our skin

Is much more pretty.

Really?

You cause chaos.

You thirst for blood.

Don't call yourself mankind,
because you ain't worth it.

And what have you
done with your life?

You've murdered people.

You've raped women.

You robbed people.

You're a bastard.

The minority is
not the majority.

Mistakes are made.

Forgiveness is essential.

Would you please forgive me?

Because I ate your father alive.

[Laughing]

[Screaming]

Oh god, you [inaudible].

REPORTER: Wait.
Wait.

I'm getting something.

[Screaming]

REPORTER: OK.

Oh my god.

I... Iraq is taking
advantage of the situation

And now has contr... oh my god,
now has control of Europe.

Look out!

[Crying]

Fuck.

So I guess it's over, huh?

Yeah.

Thanks for the help.

That was one guy.

I thought you could handle it.

Dude, he had me to
my knees before I

Knew what was happening.

And he was strong too.

I thought I was gonna buy it.

You're here now, aren't you?

Yeah, barely, you dumb fuck.

Hey, you know, you shouldn't
use such bad language.

Oh, like God's gonna
jump out of his throne

And come down here
and kick my ass

Cause I called you a dumb shit.

No.

I mean, if God had
really wanted to help,

He could've done something.

He could've messed with
these zombie fucks.

A bolt...
Cage.

- Of lightning...
- Cage.

- Something.
- Cage.

Stop, all right?

It's over.

It's done.

You're just pissed off
cause you're hungry.

You bet your hairless,
white, dimpled ass I'm hungry.

You didn't get the
fucking grits, right?

No grits.

Let's go get you some
grits, shut you up, OK?

Damn good idea.

I'm buying.

You're paying?

- I'm buying.
- All right.

Let's get out of here.

All right, buddy.

Let's go.

You know that special feeling
that you were talking about?

Yeah.

I think I have that
feeling for you.

Shit.

Man, it looks like we've
got a couple of maniac cops

On our hands, huh?

That's right.

Sick.

Sick, sick fuckers.

We're gonna have to search
this college inside and out,

Man, and find these guys.

It ain't gonna be
easy with this leg.

Ah, come on.

Let's get on this already.

Let's go.

Fucking sick people, man.

Sick.

Sick.

I'm gonna have sausage.

I'm gonna have bacon.
Wait, but what about the grits?

- I'm gonna have four eggs.
- You're gonna have grits?

Hey.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Look.

Those are the two
fucking cops over there.

You know, we bust their moldy
little fucking pimpled ass.

We can be celebrities.

What do you think?

Let's go.

I'm gonna have grits.

You're gonna have grits.

There'll be grits all around.

I like grits, but...

Oh look, my name tag.

Make sure there's no...

[Gunshot]

Jeff!

Oh, no!

[Laughing]

I got him!

I'm the guy that bagged him!

I'm famous!

You stupid fuck.

Jeff!

Oh my god!

Oh, no, it's gonna
happen all over again.

Oh, no!

God!

REPORTER: Members of
the Senate will set up

An emergency press conference.

There are no members of
the House still alive.

Wait, wait, I'm
getting something...

What the fuck is this crap?

REPORTER: OK.

Oh my god!

I... Iraq is taking
advantage of the situation

And now has contr... oh my god.

Now has control of Europe.

[Screaming]

Bring that fuck to me.

Well, if it isn't Twinkle
Twinkle Killer [inaudible].

How do you explain all those
dead bodies in the college?

There aren't any bodies
in there, just zombies.

Look, you fuck.

There's no zombies in there.

There were innocent
women, children, kids.

And they're all dead.

And you and your wacko
partner killed them.

There's no students in that
building, no professors,

Just zombies.

Listen.

Don't fuck with me anymore.

You and that wacko partner
killed everybody in there

And you shot them death.

There was girls in there
attacked by zombies.

There's... there's Melissa.

She's in the safe house.

Zombies?

Are you fucking crazy?

Yes, you're fucking crazy.

You're out of your fucking mind.

And I'm taking you down, Cage.

I'm taking your badge,
and you're going to hell.

You're a loser,
and you are fucked.

And you are going down.

Who do you think you are?

Matt Cordell Maniac Cop?

I oughta shoot you right
now on the frikkin spot,

You piece of scum.

I'm innocent, man.

I'm innocent.

Get him out of my fucking face.

Well, you little fuck, how's
you like to look at yourself?

You're nothing but a
nickel dick I wouldn't

Even give a squirt of piss for.

So you know what?

I want you to just just
sit back and relax.

And we're gonna take real good
care of you, of you, Cage.

You and the
psychiatric department.

And I'm gonna see you put
away for a long, long time.

Get in.

Get me outta here.

Let's get the fuck out of here.

Get out of here!

LAURA REYNOLDS: So
there you have it.

The money-hungry
internal affairs

Guys think the officers did it.

Others believe in the myth
that the world was really

Being overtaken
by zombie looking

Freaks that have the
ability to look like humans.

So were the bodies found
at the college really

Humans, or just the outer shells
of the devil's little soldiers?

I, personally, believe
the end is near.

And believe me when
I say there is no

No stopping these little fucks.

I sure as hell don't want to be
around to see it happen either.

You're on the air.

CALLER 1: You're -You're
telling me those zombie

Looking freaks are for real?

I have no proof, but I sure
as hell think they're for real.

CALLER 1: So we're all gonna
die from the zombie looking

Freaks taking over the world?

Where there's a
man, there's a woman.

When two people love
each other enough,

There tends to be a child.

So there you go.

Merry fucking Christmas.

What?

Lock the door on your way out.

MAN: No!

No, no, no!

[Moaning]

Goddamn zombies!

[Music playing]

JANITOR: Oh!

Oh, Jesus!

Jesus, please.

Jesus, I swear I
won't masturbate.

No more, Jesus.

I'll never [inaudible]
I'll never do it again.

I won't worship the [inaudible].

I mean, I will worship
the [inaudible].

But I won't... I won't
play with myself anymore.

I swear to God, Jesus.

I'll get rid of those magazines
with cows and the pigs in them.

I... I will never do that again.

Oh.

[Knocking]

What was that?

Zombie.

BOTH: A zombie?

[Screaming]

What... what is that?

Those are zombies.

A zombie?

Zombies?

[Screaming]

What is that?

Zombie.

- A zombie?
- Zombies?

[Screaming]

CALLER 2: Hello?

Hello?

Oh my god.

Somebody please, please help.

Help.

We were barbecuing outside
and... and... and this guy

Came up on our front lawn.

And he just stunk and
his skin was falling off.

And he picked up my
cat and he ate her.

And he started to eat my little
brother... not in that way.

But he was eating him,
like, you've got to help me.

Please!
Please!

Oh my god.

Oh, he's...

[Screaming]

I don't appreciate...
What's it again?

DIRECTOR: I don't appreciate
being spoken to in that manner.

Put... put that up
here so I can see it.

DIRECTOR: Say it again for me.

Don't talk to me about that.

DIRECTOR: Don't
talk to me that way.

All right.
OK.

DIRECTOR: Action.

Don't talk to me about that.

Nah, that can't be right.
Don't...

BRINKE STEVENS: [inaudible]
- I'm sorry.

What is it?

BRINKE STEVENS: Don't
talk to me that way.

Right.

OK.

Don't talk to me about... ah, I
keep screwing up [inaudible].

BRINKE STEVENS: Don't
talk to me that way.

Don't talk to me that way.

Don't talk to me about...
Ah, I keep screwing it up.

BRINKE STEVENS: Don't
talk to me that way.

Don't talk to me that way.

That way, right?

Was that it?

Don't talk to me that way.

Don't talk to me about...
Nah, I keep screwing it...

BRINKE STEVENS: What about
don't talk to me like that?

DIRECTOR: That'll work.

Don't talk to me that way.

Is that... Don't
talk to me that way.

Don't talk to me about that.

Ah, I keep screwing...
I don't know why.

Don't talk to me
that way, right?

Don't talk to me
that way, right?

DIRECTOR: DIRECTOR: Yeah.

Don't talk to me that way.

You ready?

DIRECTOR: DIRECTOR: Yeah.

Don't talk to me that way.

I've gotta go.

Well, I guess I'll go
out and change loaves

To fishes there or something.

[Laughter]

We're at a dialogue here.

OK.

So I've had a thing for you
for quite some time now.

Yes.

Yes what?

Yes, I'll go out with you.

OK.

That...

MARCO: Yeah, hello?

911?

Yeah, this is Marco.

Yeah, over at Luigi's
Pizza Emporium.

Look, I got an
emergency over here.

4242 Calhoun.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's the place.

You know, with the big
neon pizza on the roof.

Look, we need the cops... all
right... over here pronto.

What's the problem?

I'll tell you the problem.

We got a zombie infestation.

Yeah!

You heard me.

Zombies.

Jeez!

They're eating the customers.

Aw, man!

This is really bad for business.

Hey!
Hey!

Don't eat the cook!

We don't got a replacement!

Did you hear that?

Look, if I don't get help here
soon, I'm out of business.

Did you hear that?

Oh, great!

Now they're getting
into the pepperoni.

These guys are worse than rats.

OK.

OK.

You... listen, spud face,
out of the Parmesan cheese!

Look, I gotta go.

You better send some
cops over here soon.

I'm about to open a can of
whoop ass on some zombie butt

Out here.

Get 'em here now!

CALLER 3: Oh, man!

Oh, lordy, lordy!
They're eating my dog!

They're eating my dog!
They're eating [inaudible]!

They're eating [inaudible]!

Oh! [Inaudible].

Oh... oh, god!

They're eating my bunny!

He's eating my
bunny [inaudible].

Oh!

OK.

Look, [inaudible].

OK.

Oh, god!

They're coming through the
door. [Inaudible] Oh, god.

[Inaudible]
Oh, man.

Look at that.

That guy's missing an eye.

Oh, god, that's creepy.

Ahh I'm scared.

[Inaudible]
Oh, god.

Oh, lordy.

Lordy, lordy, lordy!

Somebody help me.

[Inaudible]

Help me please, help.