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1
00:00:02,572 --> 00:00:04,510
♪ ♪
2
00:00:04,576 --> 00:00:06,312
Ho, ho, ho!
3
00:00:10,153 --> 00:00:11,524
(shrieks)
4
00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:18,436
(school bell rings)
5
00:00:21,142 --> 00:00:22,144
(grunts)
6
00:00:25,050 --> 00:00:27,221
�(bicycle bell rings) �(barking)
7
00:00:27,288 --> 00:00:28,891
Merry Christmas!
8
00:00:28,958 --> 00:00:30,962
(electronic beeping)
9
00:00:32,732 --> 00:00:35,672
(munching)
10
00:00:35,738 --> 00:00:37,576
Oh, stupid Flanders.
11
00:00:37,642 --> 00:00:39,011
("game over" noise plays)
12
00:00:39,078 --> 00:00:40,080
D'oh!
13
00:00:48,096 --> 00:00:50,668
Oh, thanks for bringing me
up here, Dad.
14
00:00:50,735 --> 00:00:52,271
It's magnificent.
15
00:00:52,338 --> 00:00:54,810
Ugh, I could really use it
after what happened today.
16
00:00:54,876 --> 00:00:56,714
Aw, sweetie, are you still mad
17
00:00:56,780 --> 00:00:58,951
about that big dumb jerk
at school?
18
00:00:59,018 --> 00:01:00,521
She's my teacher.
19
00:01:00,588 --> 00:01:02,257
And her name is Miss Hoover.
20
00:01:02,324 --> 00:01:04,061
It's unforgivable what she did.
21
00:01:04,128 --> 00:01:05,497
What was it again?
22
00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:07,334
(groans)
23
00:01:09,806 --> 00:01:12,946
Breakfast!
24
00:01:13,013 --> 00:01:14,983
Here you go.
25
00:01:16,019 --> 00:01:17,522
Melon?! Ugh.
26
00:01:17,589 --> 00:01:19,358
Marge, no one dreams
of waking up
27
00:01:19,425 --> 00:01:21,362
to the sounds of frying melon.
28
00:01:21,429 --> 00:01:23,166
- Yeah, Marge.
- See?
29
00:01:23,233 --> 00:01:26,172
Your fruit breakfast has turned
him into a first name user.
30
00:01:26,239 --> 00:01:28,511
For once, could this family
start the day
31
00:01:28,577 --> 00:01:31,349
with fruit instead of
greasy animal fat?
32
00:01:31,416 --> 00:01:32,852
Even the dog is sweating grease.
33
00:01:32,919 --> 00:01:34,923
(barking)
34
00:01:37,394 --> 00:01:40,668
He'll be back for breakfast
and... (gasps) Oh, God!
35
00:01:40,735 --> 00:01:42,071
♪ ♪
36
00:01:43,974 --> 00:01:45,110
�(Marge gasps) �We got her!
37
00:01:46,112 --> 00:01:47,448
(groans)
38
00:01:49,285 --> 00:01:52,357
I think I've got the answer.
39
00:01:52,424 --> 00:01:54,529
Mm�hmm. Gravy up your fruit,
boy?
40
00:01:54,596 --> 00:01:56,533
Look at me. I'm eating healthy.
41
00:01:56,600 --> 00:01:59,038
(gargling)
42
00:01:59,105 --> 00:02:00,440
(sighs) You win.
43
00:02:00,508 --> 00:02:01,710
I'll make bacon.
44
00:02:01,777 --> 00:02:03,313
Put away the gravy boat.
45
00:02:03,379 --> 00:02:06,152
They say the best days
of a gravy boat owner's life
46
00:02:06,219 --> 00:02:09,158
are the day you get it
and the day you get rid of it.
47
00:02:09,225 --> 00:02:10,561
(chuckles)
48
00:02:11,563 --> 00:02:13,333
No, Bart, stop!
49
00:02:13,399 --> 00:02:16,740
This is my mobile for my
"Who Inspires You?" project.
50
00:02:16,807 --> 00:02:20,413
Let me guess: it's gravity.
The ultimate suck�up.
51
00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:24,421
(chuckles) Can't spell "gravity"
without "gravy."
52
00:02:24,488 --> 00:02:26,492
(chuckles)
Have some more.
53
00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:28,664
(gulps, sighs)
54
00:02:28,731 --> 00:02:32,237
The subject I have chosen
for my mobile is this lady.
55
00:02:32,304 --> 00:02:33,304
Ta�da!
56
00:02:33,339 --> 00:02:36,547
Of course. Yes. Her. Absolutely.
57
00:02:36,613 --> 00:02:41,122
The woman who lives
at the center of the Earth.
58
00:02:41,189 --> 00:02:43,193
It's Gladys West,
the mathematician
59
00:02:43,259 --> 00:02:47,401
whose work in satellite geodesy
helped create GPS.
60
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:51,409
GPS. The invention that killed
the "I got lost" excuse.
61
00:02:51,475 --> 00:02:54,215
Oh, gee, I'm sorry, Marge.
62
00:02:54,281 --> 00:02:57,989
I just can't find the restaurant
for your sisters' birthday.
63
00:02:58,056 --> 00:03:01,262
GPS:Your destination is60 feet ahead.
64
00:03:01,329 --> 00:03:02,431
Shut up.
65
00:03:02,497 --> 00:03:03,868
40 feet ahead.
66
00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:05,270
Shut up!
67
00:03:05,337 --> 00:03:06,840
20 feet ahead.
68
00:03:06,907 --> 00:03:09,278
Just what I need: another woman
who's always right.
69
00:03:09,345 --> 00:03:13,319
You have now arrived at
Lovely Ladies Cigar Lounge.
70
00:03:14,355 --> 00:03:17,762
You'll be cutting and serving
the us�shaped cake.
71
00:03:17,829 --> 00:03:20,133
�(laughs) �Who wants a thigh?
72
00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:23,774
Curse you, Gladys West!
73
00:03:23,841 --> 00:03:25,477
�(scoffs) �Dad, please!
74
00:03:25,544 --> 00:03:28,149
This mobile could be
my ticket into Yale.
75
00:03:28,216 --> 00:03:30,320
Another Bush kid.
Another Bush kid.
76
00:03:30,387 --> 00:03:32,457
How about this girl?
77
00:03:32,525 --> 00:03:34,629
Her grades and test scores
are superb.
78
00:03:34,696 --> 00:03:36,399
She's got boola.
79
00:03:36,465 --> 00:03:39,004
But does she have "Boola Boola"?
80
00:03:39,071 --> 00:03:42,010
What about this mobile
she did in the second grade?
81
00:03:42,077 --> 00:03:44,281
Accept. Full ride.
82
00:03:44,348 --> 00:03:47,689
♪ Boola Boola,Boola Boola... ♪
83
00:03:47,755 --> 00:03:50,861
Ah, wha�� how did I get here?
84
00:03:50,928 --> 00:03:53,199
They say it's dangerous
to wake up someone
85
00:03:53,266 --> 00:03:55,203
who's dreaming of Yale.
86
00:03:55,270 --> 00:03:58,376
Well, just so I'm covered,
let me dream of a safety school.
87
00:03:58,443 --> 00:04:00,982
(snores)
88
00:04:01,048 --> 00:04:03,219
UMass Amherst.
89
00:04:03,286 --> 00:04:04,221
(snores)
90
00:04:04,288 --> 00:04:05,558
(school bell rings)
91
00:04:06,626 --> 00:04:08,630
Is Miss Hoover out sick?
92
00:04:08,697 --> 00:04:10,968
No, I'm in sick.
93
00:04:11,035 --> 00:04:12,939
I sprained a disc in my back.
94
00:04:13,006 --> 00:04:14,642
It feels like I'm passing
a kidney stone
95
00:04:14,709 --> 00:04:16,312
while giving birth.
96
00:04:16,379 --> 00:04:18,817
I say "excuse me"
when I give burps.
97
00:04:18,884 --> 00:04:20,153
Not the same, Ralph.
98
00:04:20,220 --> 00:04:22,658
Fortunately, my new
Teaching With Stylus tablet
99
00:04:22,725 --> 00:04:25,698
lets me run the classroom
from any position.
100
00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:28,537
(sighs) Let's get inspired.
101
00:04:28,604 --> 00:04:30,473
You might think
"German chocolate cake"
102
00:04:30,541 --> 00:04:33,346
originated in Germany, but nein.
103
00:04:33,413 --> 00:04:36,853
Actually, it was invented
by an American mill worker
104
00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:39,158
named Samuel German.
105
00:04:39,224 --> 00:04:40,528
(all gasp)
106
00:04:40,594 --> 00:04:43,700
I'm from America
but my measles are German.
107
00:04:43,767 --> 00:04:46,973
I'm inspired by
The Masked Singer and...
108
00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:49,913
It doesn't come off. Help!
109
00:04:49,979 --> 00:04:54,756
Help! Help...!
110
00:04:56,626 --> 00:04:58,730
I know these presentations
are boring
111
00:04:58,797 --> 00:05:00,734
and everyone hates them, so...
112
00:05:00,801 --> 00:05:02,037
- You're gonna stop?
- Better.
113
00:05:02,104 --> 00:05:03,607
I'm gonna rap.
114
00:05:03,674 --> 00:05:05,578
(all groan)
115
00:05:06,580 --> 00:05:09,118
(rapper beatboxing)
116
00:05:11,021 --> 00:05:12,491
♪ ♪
117
00:05:12,558 --> 00:05:15,363
♪ Ah�ha�ha�ha, Gladys West,Gladys West ♪
118
00:05:15,430 --> 00:05:16,990
♪ If you don't knowwhere you're goin' ♪
119
00:05:17,033 --> 00:05:18,613
♪ She'll make sure your cardon't get a towin' ♪
120
00:05:18,637 --> 00:05:20,182
♪ Satellite telemetry,should've been in ebony ♪
121
00:05:20,206 --> 00:05:21,786
♪ When it comes to geodesy,she's got mad skills ♪
122
00:05:21,810 --> 00:05:24,414
- ♪ Like Yeezy ♪
- ♪ We're giving props to ♪
123
00:05:24,481 --> 00:05:25,851
♪ Gladys West ♪
124
00:05:25,918 --> 00:05:27,855
♪ We're giving props ♪
125
00:05:27,922 --> 00:05:30,426
♪ 'Cause she's the best ♪
126
00:05:30,493 --> 00:05:32,197
- Lisa.
- ♪ Doo�doo�doo�doo ♪
127
00:05:32,264 --> 00:05:33,432
♪ Doo�doo�doo ♪
128
00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:35,604
Lisa, you're over
your two�minute limit.
129
00:05:35,671 --> 00:05:38,042
♪ Doo�doo�doo�doo, doo�doo�doo ♪
130
00:05:38,109 --> 00:05:40,781
That's enough.
Ralph, you're up.
131
00:05:40,848 --> 00:05:43,019
My hero is my thumb.
132
00:05:43,085 --> 00:05:46,125
It has its own room in
my mittens. Thank you.
133
00:05:46,192 --> 00:05:47,695
Okay. That's it.
134
00:05:47,762 --> 00:05:50,166
Now put the supplements
to your reports on my desk.
135
00:05:55,544 --> 00:05:57,447
Give me a sec
to post the grades.
136
00:06:00,654 --> 00:06:03,025
A B�minus? No, no.
137
00:06:03,092 --> 00:06:06,265
This can't be right.
This can't be right.
138
00:06:06,332 --> 00:06:09,505
The same grade as Ralph?!
Sorry, Ralph, no offense.
139
00:06:09,572 --> 00:06:11,910
There's "a fence" around my bed
140
00:06:11,977 --> 00:06:15,016
so I don't steal things
from Daddy's squad car again.
141
00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:17,955
LOU:Chief, did you tell Snake hecould have jail outside today?
142
00:06:18,022 --> 00:06:19,424
'Cause that's what he's saying.
143
00:06:19,491 --> 00:06:20,794
WIGGUM:
Leave me alone.
144
00:06:20,861 --> 00:06:22,898
Listen, Miss "took too long
on her presentation,"
145
00:06:22,965 --> 00:06:25,470
it's not only right, it's easy
146
00:06:25,537 --> 00:06:28,476
with my "Select All"
B�minus option.
147
00:06:28,543 --> 00:06:31,482
Miss Hoover, this is so unfair.
148
00:06:31,549 --> 00:06:34,622
I come here every day
eager to learn
149
00:06:34,689 --> 00:06:37,662
and you just put me down
150
00:06:37,728 --> 00:06:39,799
and complain about your job.
151
00:06:39,866 --> 00:06:41,670
In the end, what are you?
152
00:06:41,736 --> 00:06:43,907
You're just somebody
who works off a formula
153
00:06:43,974 --> 00:06:46,011
that leaves no room for passion,
154
00:06:46,078 --> 00:06:48,149
individual effort,
155
00:06:48,215 --> 00:06:50,486
or the process
of learning itself.
156
00:06:50,554 --> 00:06:51,923
- Mm.
- In other words,
157
00:06:51,990 --> 00:06:54,494
you're an uninspiring hack!
158
00:06:54,562 --> 00:06:57,635
Apologize immediately.
159
00:06:57,702 --> 00:07:00,507
No. I told the truth.
160
00:07:00,574 --> 00:07:03,412
The truth has no place
in this classroom.
161
00:07:03,479 --> 00:07:05,751
Lisa, go to detention.
162
00:07:05,818 --> 00:07:08,289
(echoing):
Detention. Detention. Detention.
163
00:07:17,073 --> 00:07:20,079
One pencil with nervous
teeth marks.
164
00:07:20,146 --> 00:07:23,820
One spelling bee
winner's ribbon, faded.
165
00:07:23,887 --> 00:07:26,693
One quarter ounce of marijuana.
166
00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:28,496
Those are pencil shavings.
167
00:07:28,563 --> 00:07:31,503
Willie's water pipe
will be the judge of that.
168
00:07:31,569 --> 00:07:34,107
♪ ♪
169
00:07:44,595 --> 00:07:47,968
- (spitball ricochets)
- ♪ ♪
170
00:08:04,502 --> 00:08:06,438
Look at those arms.
171
00:08:06,506 --> 00:08:09,377
Blank canvas
for a Sharpie tattoo.
172
00:08:11,114 --> 00:08:13,385
Um, I'm actually a vegetarian.
(laughs nervously)
173
00:08:13,452 --> 00:08:16,058
Okay, how do you feel
about beets?
174
00:08:16,124 --> 00:08:19,130
Ooh, is this one of those
questions that sets me up
175
00:08:19,197 --> 00:08:20,233
to get punched?
176
00:08:20,299 --> 00:08:22,203
Only one way to find out.
177
00:08:22,270 --> 00:08:24,474
Yeah, tell us
your opinion of beets.
178
00:08:24,542 --> 00:08:26,478
BART:
Leave her alone, you jackals.
179
00:08:26,546 --> 00:08:28,750
♪ ♪
180
00:08:28,817 --> 00:08:31,321
This is the largest stink bomb
they make.
181
00:08:31,388 --> 00:08:33,827
So powerful it could only
be developed by a scientist
182
00:08:33,894 --> 00:08:35,931
without a nose.
183
00:08:35,998 --> 00:08:37,835
How did he know it worked?
184
00:08:37,902 --> 00:08:40,339
He smelled it... with his ears.
185
00:08:40,406 --> 00:08:42,745
- Whoa.
- Uh�oh.
- Oh.
186
00:08:42,811 --> 00:08:44,849
And that girl's with me.
187
00:08:44,916 --> 00:08:46,151
Whoa!
188
00:08:46,753 --> 00:08:49,057
Well, well, well.
Together at last.
189
00:08:49,124 --> 00:08:50,961
I didn't do anything wrong.
190
00:08:51,028 --> 00:08:54,067
Miss Hoover should be
in detention, not me.
191
00:08:54,134 --> 00:08:55,904
There is a detention
for teachers.
192
00:08:55,971 --> 00:08:57,373
It's called being a teacher.
193
00:08:57,440 --> 00:08:59,444
Now, let me show you my world.
194
00:08:59,512 --> 00:09:01,248
Lots of gangs will recruit you:
195
00:09:01,315 --> 00:09:03,085
The Magnificent Seven�Year�Olds.
196
00:09:03,152 --> 00:09:06,024
Tardy Incorporated.
Hell's Angles.
197
00:09:06,091 --> 00:09:08,162
(excited murmuring)
198
00:09:09,799 --> 00:09:14,207
My greatest weapon is inside
my head. My mucus.
199
00:09:14,274 --> 00:09:16,211
Ms. Timberwood!
200
00:09:16,278 --> 00:09:18,282
In here, she doesn't know you.
201
00:09:18,349 --> 00:09:20,252
She used to call me Sunshine.
202
00:09:20,319 --> 00:09:22,123
I call all the girls Sunshine.
203
00:09:22,190 --> 00:09:24,629
I call all the boys Joe Cool.
204
00:09:24,695 --> 00:09:27,233
Oh, you said I was
the only Joe Cool!
205
00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:29,070
�(grunts) �(sniffs)
206
00:09:29,137 --> 00:09:32,645
That's actually lavender,
so, thank you.
207
00:09:32,711 --> 00:09:34,180
BART:
! Ay caramba!
208
00:09:35,182 --> 00:09:37,153
(sobbing):
No...!
209
00:09:41,696 --> 00:09:43,967
(sniffles)
No dinner for me.
210
00:09:44,034 --> 00:09:46,004
I'm too miserable to eat again.
211
00:09:46,071 --> 00:09:48,242
This is pretty rough on me, too.
212
00:09:50,379 --> 00:09:51,716
(sobbing)
213
00:09:52,985 --> 00:09:54,487
(muffled sobbing)
214
00:09:54,555 --> 00:09:56,993
Please pull the covers off.
215
00:09:57,060 --> 00:10:01,134
No, I don't want to live
in the world above the covers.
216
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:02,336
(sighs)
217
00:10:03,907 --> 00:10:07,013
I worked so hard on my mobile.
218
00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:10,386
I know. And Miss Hoover
wasn't very nice.
219
00:10:10,453 --> 00:10:12,290
Thank you, Mom.
220
00:10:12,356 --> 00:10:14,127
But you weren't very nice,
either.
221
00:10:14,194 --> 00:10:15,229
What?!
222
00:10:15,296 --> 00:10:16,966
Hey, are we camping out here?
223
00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:19,204
Because I have a great
campfire story.
224
00:10:19,270 --> 00:10:22,477
About a man betrayed
by his own hand.
225
00:10:22,544 --> 00:10:25,182
What the...?
Oh, oh, my God, it's you!
226
00:10:25,249 --> 00:10:28,055
(choking)
227
00:10:28,122 --> 00:10:30,192
- Homer.
- Yes, Marge.
228
00:10:30,259 --> 00:10:33,933
I was going to encourage
Lisa to apologize.
229
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,369
But I shouldn't have to.
230
00:10:35,436 --> 00:10:37,841
Women say "I'm sorry" constantly
231
00:10:37,908 --> 00:10:40,045
because men make us feel like
we have to apologize
232
00:10:40,112 --> 00:10:41,381
for existing
233
00:10:41,448 --> 00:10:43,787
while they do
whatever they like.
234
00:10:43,853 --> 00:10:45,456
Yo. Milhouse is sleepin' over.
235
00:10:45,524 --> 00:10:47,226
- Awesome.
- Huh?
236
00:10:47,293 --> 00:10:48,495
(Lisa groans)
237
00:10:50,299 --> 00:10:51,736
Wah!
238
00:10:51,803 --> 00:10:53,807
Ready to apologize, Lisa?
239
00:10:53,873 --> 00:10:55,811
We both know
what's at stake here.
240
00:10:59,217 --> 00:11:01,388
Not so fast, Lisa.
241
00:11:01,454 --> 00:11:04,227
You didn't apologize
to your second grade teacher,
242
00:11:04,294 --> 00:11:07,099
and all we do at Yale
is apologize.
243
00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:10,239
♪ Sorry, sorry, sorry ♪
244
00:11:10,306 --> 00:11:13,345
♪ Please excuse our quirks ♪
245
00:11:13,412 --> 00:11:15,382
♪ Quirks, quirks, quirks ♪
246
00:11:15,449 --> 00:11:18,422
♪ Won't you kindly listen ♪
247
00:11:18,488 --> 00:11:22,096
♪ To us rich male jerks? ♪
248
00:11:22,163 --> 00:11:26,304
♪ We sing for free. ♪
249
00:11:29,477 --> 00:11:31,883
(shivering)
250
00:11:31,949 --> 00:11:35,422
Okay, Lisa, your future is
in my hands.
251
00:11:35,489 --> 00:11:38,563
I'm�I'm... not sorry!
252
00:11:38,630 --> 00:11:40,466
I'm just glad
I won't have you next year
253
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:41,936
as a teacher.
254
00:11:42,003 --> 00:11:45,009
I might just move to third grade
to torment you.
255
00:11:45,075 --> 00:11:48,148
That would be a real hack move.
256
00:11:48,215 --> 00:11:49,652
Ugh!
257
00:11:49,718 --> 00:11:51,689
Freshen it up.
258
00:11:53,058 --> 00:11:54,394
Love it.
259
00:11:59,170 --> 00:12:01,542
Personally, I never say
I'm sorry.
260
00:12:01,609 --> 00:12:04,080
I say "I'm soggy."
Teachers hear what they want.
261
00:12:04,147 --> 00:12:07,320
Bart Simpson, did you glue
these recorders together?
262
00:12:07,386 --> 00:12:08,488
Soggy.
263
00:12:08,556 --> 00:12:10,727
- Forgiven.
- And Willie can use it
264
00:12:10,794 --> 00:12:12,798
to whack the hornets' nests.
265
00:12:12,864 --> 00:12:15,069
�(hornets buzzing) �(grunting)
266
00:12:15,135 --> 00:12:17,340
Yeah, come on and fight me
like a man.
267
00:12:17,406 --> 00:12:19,010
(grunting)
268
00:12:19,077 --> 00:12:21,515
Uh, which one of you does
the negotiating?
269
00:12:21,582 --> 00:12:23,185
Miss Hoover?
270
00:12:23,251 --> 00:12:25,122
(clears throat)
In reference to our
271
00:12:25,189 --> 00:12:27,995
recent difficulty,
I would just like to say
272
00:12:28,061 --> 00:12:29,464
I'm soggy.
273
00:12:29,531 --> 00:12:31,969
Did you just say "I'm soggy"?
274
00:12:32,036 --> 00:12:34,708
In addition to a hack,
you must think I'm a fool.
275
00:12:34,775 --> 00:12:36,979
- Double detention.
- (gasps)
276
00:12:37,046 --> 00:12:40,319
♪ Who's soggy now? ♪
277
00:12:40,386 --> 00:12:42,023
And that counts
as your music education
278
00:12:42,089 --> 00:12:43,826
for the semester.
279
00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:46,364
Feels kind of funny driving
you home from detention.
280
00:12:46,431 --> 00:12:47,868
(chuckles)
281
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:49,905
Yeah, well, it's gonna
take me a few minutes
282
00:12:49,972 --> 00:12:52,143
to get used to being
on the outside.
283
00:12:52,209 --> 00:12:55,049
Honey, play the ad
I forwarded you.
284
00:12:55,115 --> 00:12:56,795
ANNOUNCER:Having trouble witha relationship?
285
00:12:56,819 --> 00:12:59,190
Come to the Springfield
Education Annex.
286
00:12:59,257 --> 00:13:01,562
We'll teach you how to
communicate honestly,
287
00:13:01,629 --> 00:13:03,165
how to lie convincingly,
288
00:13:03,231 --> 00:13:05,804
and how to apologize
and mostly mean it.
289
00:13:05,870 --> 00:13:07,339
Apologize?
290
00:13:07,406 --> 00:13:08,976
Springfield Education Annex,
291
00:13:09,043 --> 00:13:11,314
located in the third abandoned
mall on Route One.
292
00:13:11,381 --> 00:13:13,261
Don't park at the Greek church
across the street.
293
00:13:13,285 --> 00:13:14,955
We're in a feud with them.
294
00:13:15,022 --> 00:13:17,794
There's nothing orthodox about
how fast they tow.
295
00:13:17,861 --> 00:13:20,299
So, when apologizing
from your heart,
296
00:13:20,365 --> 00:13:24,006
saying sorry allows
the healing process to begin.
297
00:13:24,073 --> 00:13:26,177
- Sorry I'm late.
- What?!
- She's sorry?
298
00:13:26,244 --> 00:13:28,215
Yeah, I've heard that one a lot.
299
00:13:28,281 --> 00:13:29,918
Well, I don't mind
saying I'm sorry
300
00:13:29,985 --> 00:13:31,354
when it's appropriate.
301
00:13:31,421 --> 00:13:33,926
Appropriate.
Never heard of that word.
302
00:13:33,993 --> 00:13:36,030
I know "inappropriate."
303
00:13:36,097 --> 00:13:37,901
- True. So true.
- Oh, yes, yes.
304
00:13:37,968 --> 00:13:40,940
Now, to truly apologize,
I find it helps
305
00:13:41,007 --> 00:13:44,413
to look at the world from
the other person's perspective.
306
00:13:44,480 --> 00:13:46,017
Now, repeat after me.
307
00:13:46,084 --> 00:13:48,355
I will not judge someone
until I walk a mile
308
00:13:48,421 --> 00:13:50,125
in their shoes.
309
00:13:50,192 --> 00:13:52,531
I will not judge someone until
310
00:13:52,597 --> 00:13:56,404
I walk a mile in their shoes.
311
00:13:56,471 --> 00:13:58,876
Well, what's the matter
with the rest of you?
312
00:13:58,943 --> 00:14:00,980
Walk a mile? Please.
313
00:14:01,047 --> 00:14:02,951
Like, over how many years?
314
00:14:04,153 --> 00:14:05,455
(school bell rings)
315
00:14:07,059 --> 00:14:08,663
Huh?
316
00:14:08,729 --> 00:14:11,067
Miss Hoover takes the bus.
I didn't know that.
317
00:14:11,134 --> 00:14:13,004
Actually, she takes two buses.
318
00:14:13,071 --> 00:14:15,209
Then she walks half a mile
down a train track,
319
00:14:15,275 --> 00:14:17,179
swings across a drainage ditch
320
00:14:17,246 --> 00:14:20,185
and rides a piece of cardboard
down a hill to help her back.
321
00:14:20,252 --> 00:14:23,358
- Oh, that's terrible.
- I guess.
322
00:14:23,425 --> 00:14:26,865
You learn a lot of sad things
when you sell weed to teachers.
323
00:14:26,932 --> 00:14:28,703
Make it a double.
324
00:14:28,769 --> 00:14:30,640
I'll be in the ball shed.
325
00:14:42,329 --> 00:14:45,837
- Excuse me, are you
Jennifer Aniston?
- No.
326
00:14:45,903 --> 00:14:49,811
That's exactly what
Jennifer Aniston would say.
327
00:14:49,878 --> 00:14:53,184
♪ ♪
328
00:15:03,773 --> 00:15:06,311
Oh... Dear Lord,
329
00:15:06,377 --> 00:15:08,148
please grant me this winner.
330
00:15:08,214 --> 00:15:11,822
I lost. And my quarter broke.
331
00:15:11,889 --> 00:15:13,425
Gee.
332
00:15:13,491 --> 00:15:16,130
♪ ♪
333
00:15:16,197 --> 00:15:17,499
�(grunting) �(back cracking)
334
00:15:20,405 --> 00:15:22,409
Aw.
335
00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:36,170
Yeah, I'm the super.
What are you doing here?
336
00:15:36,237 --> 00:15:38,108
Uh, I'm one of Miss Hoover's
students,
337
00:15:38,174 --> 00:15:40,546
and I just want to
understand her life.
338
00:15:40,613 --> 00:15:41,849
All right, come on in.
339
00:15:41,915 --> 00:15:44,521
How can I say no
to a sweet face like yours, huh?
340
00:15:44,588 --> 00:15:48,128
Yeah, um, I have some business
in 12�A.
341
00:15:48,194 --> 00:15:52,236
Yeah, how can I say no
to a sweet face like yours?
342
00:15:53,973 --> 00:15:55,910
Here, Hemsworth, come cuddle.
343
00:15:55,977 --> 00:15:57,680
(cat mewls defiantly)
344
00:15:57,747 --> 00:15:59,851
I'm so alone.
(sighs)
345
00:15:59,918 --> 00:16:02,089
Just don't eat me when I die.
346
00:16:02,156 --> 00:16:04,326
(mewls oddly)
347
00:16:04,393 --> 00:16:06,665
(gasps)
Is someone at the door?
348
00:16:06,732 --> 00:16:08,502
I�I can't turn my head.
349
00:16:08,569 --> 00:16:10,005
(sobs quietly)
350
00:16:10,071 --> 00:16:12,476
There's a great blues song
in here,
351
00:16:12,544 --> 00:16:14,714
but I don't know what it is.
352
00:16:14,781 --> 00:16:18,622
- Don't you drag us
into your problems.
- (crying)
353
00:16:23,264 --> 00:16:25,469
Dad, I'm ready to say I'm sorry,
354
00:16:25,536 --> 00:16:27,172
but now it's not enough.
355
00:16:27,239 --> 00:16:29,076
Lisa, you just gotta be sincere.
356
00:16:29,143 --> 00:16:31,380
If you have a disagreement
with another driver,
357
00:16:31,447 --> 00:16:34,588
you simply say, "I'm sorry.
Please go ahead."
358
00:16:34,654 --> 00:16:37,694
Then you follow 'em home
and you pee in their gas tank.
359
00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:39,196
You pee in there!
360
00:16:39,263 --> 00:16:41,334
Just can't say "I'm sorry."
361
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:43,606
Does that remind you
of anyone, Carl?
362
00:16:43,672 --> 00:16:45,408
Oh, God, not this again.
363
00:16:45,475 --> 00:16:47,680
I have nothing to apologize for.
364
00:16:47,747 --> 00:16:50,352
You had 20 years
to watch The Sixth Sense.
365
00:16:50,418 --> 00:16:52,356
That's beyond
the spoiler window.
366
00:16:52,422 --> 00:16:54,694
Oh, so it's okay for me
to tell you
367
00:16:54,761 --> 00:16:57,065
that the Lady Gaga Staris Born is exactly the same
368
00:16:57,132 --> 00:16:58,536
as all the other Star is Borns?
369
00:16:58,602 --> 00:17:01,642
(gasps)
I'll kill you. I'll kill you!
370
00:17:01,708 --> 00:17:03,378
Goodbye, college fund.
371
00:17:07,386 --> 00:17:09,323
(grunts, crying)
372
00:17:09,390 --> 00:17:12,630
You were gonna pay
for my mini fridge.
373
00:17:13,999 --> 00:17:16,505
I need to put a down payment
on something for someone
374
00:17:16,572 --> 00:17:18,842
I really owe an apology to.
375
00:17:18,909 --> 00:17:21,748
A framed movie poster for
The Three Amigos?
376
00:17:21,815 --> 00:17:23,686
It's better than you remember.
377
00:17:23,752 --> 00:17:26,457
- No.
- All right, how about
school supplies?
378
00:17:26,525 --> 00:17:29,965
I got a Scottish guy who
sells 'em to me every week.
379
00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:32,537
Hi, Willie.
380
00:17:32,604 --> 00:17:35,810
Uh, uh, yo no hablo English.
381
00:17:35,876 --> 00:17:37,580
Ach, the English.
382
00:17:37,647 --> 00:17:39,985
How I hate those wankers.
383
00:17:44,360 --> 00:17:46,798
Shh, shh, shh.
She's coming. She's coming.
384
00:17:46,865 --> 00:17:48,468
(gasps)
385
00:17:48,535 --> 00:17:51,642
- Have a seat. Top of the line.
- Oh...
386
00:17:51,708 --> 00:17:53,846
I can see your faces again.
387
00:17:53,912 --> 00:17:56,350
And now my favorite.
The ceiling.
388
00:17:56,417 --> 00:18:00,660
Miss Hoover, I'm sorry
I made your life harder,
389
00:18:00,726 --> 00:18:03,632
and I hope this chair
makes it easier.
390
00:18:03,699 --> 00:18:06,437
Well, I don't accept
your apology.
391
00:18:06,505 --> 00:18:08,441
- What?
- What am I supposed to do
392
00:18:08,509 --> 00:18:10,211
after you called me a hack?
393
00:18:10,278 --> 00:18:12,550
In retrospect,
I might have been wrong.
394
00:18:12,617 --> 00:18:14,921
The sad truth is apologies
can come too late
395
00:18:14,988 --> 00:18:16,558
to do any good.
396
00:18:16,625 --> 00:18:20,900
Congratulations, you just
learned something from my class.
397
00:18:20,966 --> 00:18:22,469
I guess what you've learned is
398
00:18:22,537 --> 00:18:24,908
teachers shouldn't get tenure.
399
00:18:24,974 --> 00:18:27,479
There has to be
a better lesson from this.
400
00:18:27,547 --> 00:18:28,982
There has to.
401
00:18:29,049 --> 00:18:31,287
You've planted a seed, sweetie.
402
00:18:31,353 --> 00:18:33,992
- The seed will grow.
- Amen.
403
00:18:34,059 --> 00:18:36,497
Why is everyone on the roof?
404
00:18:36,565 --> 00:18:38,201
(doorbell ringing)
405
00:18:38,267 --> 00:18:41,508
I know you're in there.
I'm old, but I'm not dead.
406
00:18:41,575 --> 00:18:43,344
Or is it the other way around?
407
00:18:43,411 --> 00:18:45,616
(doorbell ringing)
408
00:18:45,683 --> 00:18:47,820
What does this do?
409
00:18:47,887 --> 00:18:50,325
- (vibrating)
- Oh, that's a surprise.
410
00:18:50,391 --> 00:18:53,297
(moans):
Really quite nice.
411
00:18:53,364 --> 00:18:54,901
Oh, yeah.
412
00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:57,305
Miss Hoover, I've been thinking,
413
00:18:57,372 --> 00:18:59,911
and no offense,
but I bought you a chair.
414
00:18:59,978 --> 00:19:02,349
And that's really hard
for an eight�year�old.
415
00:19:02,415 --> 00:19:04,788
- All is forgiven.
- How forgiven?
416
00:19:04,854 --> 00:19:06,290
B�plus.
417
00:19:06,357 --> 00:19:07,359
I'll take it.
418
00:19:07,425 --> 00:19:09,196
Can I get a B�plus, too?
419
00:19:09,263 --> 00:19:10,733
- Sure.
- D'oh.
420
00:19:12,670 --> 00:19:14,473
- I'm soggy.
- Listen, boy.
421
00:19:14,541 --> 00:19:16,812
I'm on to you. I know
you're saying "soggy,"
422
00:19:16,878 --> 00:19:17,947
not "sorry." Mm.
423
00:19:18,014 --> 00:19:19,617
You're right, you're right.
424
00:19:19,684 --> 00:19:21,721
I completely apolo�cheese.
425
00:19:21,788 --> 00:19:23,625
- What?
- I beg your par�ton.
426
00:19:23,692 --> 00:19:26,230
- Come again?
- Guilty as Marged.
427
00:19:26,297 --> 00:19:28,535
I'll accept that.
428
00:19:28,602 --> 00:19:30,706
- Soggy.
- Enough already.
429
00:19:35,281 --> 00:19:37,219
♪ Lisa's at Yale ♪
430
00:19:37,285 --> 00:19:40,491
♪ She'll never fail ♪
431
00:19:40,559 --> 00:19:44,934
♪ She's got a hugecollege debt ♪
432
00:19:45,001 --> 00:19:47,740
♪ Debt, debt ♪
433
00:19:47,807 --> 00:19:50,613
Please, I'm trying to study!
434
00:19:50,679 --> 00:19:54,954
♪ Then go to Brown. ♪
435
00:19:56,925 --> 00:19:59,029
Um, can I have the book back?
436
00:19:59,096 --> 00:20:01,768
It cost $200.
437
00:20:09,550 --> 00:20:14,459
Now to dream of being
a World War I flying ace.
438
00:20:14,527 --> 00:20:17,332
(imitating engines roaring)
439
00:20:17,399 --> 00:20:20,471
(imitating gunfire)
440
00:20:20,539 --> 00:20:22,576
(gunfire)
441
00:20:30,425 --> 00:20:32,429
(moans sadly)
442
00:21:14,179 --> 00:21:16,250
Shh!
31518
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