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In the year 3535
2
00:00:36,368 --> 00:00:40,600
Ain't gonna need
to tell the truth, tell no lies
3
00:00:40,706 --> 00:00:43,800
Everything you think, do and say
4
00:00:43,909 --> 00:00:47,936
Is in the pill you took today
5
00:00:48,047 --> 00:00:51,744
In the year 4545
6
00:00:51,850 --> 00:00:55,718
Ain't gonna need your teeth,
won't need your eyes
7
00:00:55,821 --> 00:00:59,689
You won't find a thing to chew
8
00:00:59,792 --> 00:01:03,319
Nobody's gonna look at you
9
00:01:03,429 --> 00:01:07,331
In the year 5555
10
00:01:07,433 --> 00:01:11,392
Your arms are hanging
limp at your sides
11
00:01:11,503 --> 00:01:14,836
Your legs got nothing to do
12
00:01:14,940 --> 00:01:18,933
Some machine's doing that for you
13
00:01:19,044 --> 00:01:22,810
In the year 6565
14
00:01:22,915 --> 00:01:26,407
Ain't gonna need no husband,
won't need no wife
15
00:01:26,518 --> 00:01:30,648
You'll pick your son,
pick your daughter, too
16
00:01:30,756 --> 00:01:37,423
From the bottom
of a long glass tube, whoa-oh
17
00:01:42,234 --> 00:01:45,965
In the year 7510
18
00:01:46,071 --> 00:01:50,030
If God's a-coming
He ought to make it by then
19
00:01:50,142 --> 00:01:53,942
Maybe he'll look around himself and say
20
00:01:54,046 --> 00:01:57,743
Guess it's time for the Judgment Day
21
00:01:57,850 --> 00:02:01,616
In the year 8510
22
00:02:01,753 --> 00:02:04,881
God is gonna shake his mighty head
23
00:02:05,424 --> 00:02:09,087
He'll either say,
'"I'm pleased where man has been '"
24
00:02:09,194 --> 00:02:15,861
Or tear it down and start again, whoa-oh
25
00:02:17,202 --> 00:02:20,865
In the year 9595
26
00:02:20,973 --> 00:02:24,739
I'm kind of wondering
if man is gonna be alive
27
00:02:24,843 --> 00:02:28,802
He's taken everything
this old Earth can give
28
00:02:28,914 --> 00:02:33,908
And he ain't put back nothing, whoa-oh
29
00:02:34,019 --> 00:02:37,147
Now it's been 10,000 years
30
00:02:37,256 --> 00:02:40,419
Man has cried a billion tears
31
00:02:40,526 --> 00:02:43,290
For what he never knew
32
00:02:43,395 --> 00:02:45,590
Now man's reign is through
33
00:02:45,697 --> 00:02:46,664
Benjamin.
34
00:02:47,399 --> 00:02:49,128
What are you doing? We're going to be late.
35
00:02:49,735 --> 00:02:51,293
- Are you excited?
- Yeah.
36
00:02:52,437 --> 00:02:53,631
And guess what?
37
00:02:53,739 --> 00:02:57,140
I heated up the hot water bottle
so you can sit on it while we drive.
38
00:02:58,944 --> 00:03:03,005
In the year 2525
39
00:03:03,115 --> 00:03:06,812
If man is still alive
40
00:03:06,919 --> 00:03:13,586
If woman can survive
they may find
41
00:03:25,370 --> 00:03:27,770
Benjy, I'm so glad you signed up for this.
42
00:03:28,273 --> 00:03:30,833
I think this is gonna be
a really neat opportunity for you.
43
00:03:37,683 --> 00:03:40,379
- Hey. You Benjamin?
- Yeah.
44
00:03:40,485 --> 00:03:43,648
I'm Mr. Keefe,
the homeschool co-op advisor this year,
45
00:03:43,755 --> 00:03:47,748
but you can call me Todd,
or some people just like to call me Keefe.
46
00:03:47,859 --> 00:03:52,489
I think you're really gonna enjoy
the Cletus Festival this year.
47
00:03:53,098 --> 00:03:55,589
It's the best writers' camp in the state.
48
00:03:56,668 --> 00:04:01,264
Keefe, can you tell me how much money
he's gonna need for two days?
49
00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:03,530
You think 4 bucks would be enough?
50
00:04:04,042 --> 00:04:09,139
- Uh... I'd say more like 40, maybe
- Really?
51
00:04:15,754 --> 00:04:19,212
Well, we better hit the road.
Got a big day tomorrow.
52
00:04:19,358 --> 00:04:20,325
Be safe.
53
00:04:24,062 --> 00:04:25,029
Hey, Benjy.
54
00:04:26,632 --> 00:04:29,362
Remember who you are
and what you stand for.
55
00:04:31,870 --> 00:04:33,997
I love you forever and ever.
56
00:04:45,784 --> 00:04:47,411
Good morning, homeschoolers
57
00:04:48,453 --> 00:04:51,149
Is everybody excited
for Cletus Fest or what?
58
00:04:55,227 --> 00:04:56,194
Yeah.
59
00:04:57,095 --> 00:05:01,327
We will be stopping for lunch
at the Kozy Cafe in Echo
60
00:05:02,334 --> 00:05:04,131
Some of you can afford to eat there,
61
00:05:06,571 --> 00:05:10,940
but those who can't will just eat
the food they brought from home
62
00:05:12,511 --> 00:05:14,069
Are there any questions?
63
00:05:22,254 --> 00:05:25,485
Whether you like it or not,
when you get overseas,
64
00:05:25,590 --> 00:05:27,717
- especially to Europe, I think...
- Right.
65
00:05:28,427 --> 00:05:30,019
- It's different.
- It's totally different.
66
00:05:30,128 --> 00:05:32,289
And you're completely infused
with another energy,
67
00:05:32,397 --> 00:05:34,490
whether you open yourself up to it or not.
68
00:05:34,599 --> 00:05:37,762
- So, I found it really, really inspiring.
- Hey, Benjamin.
69
00:05:37,869 --> 00:05:39,894
Come here, I want you to meet someone.
70
00:05:44,176 --> 00:05:46,770
Benjamin,
I'd like you to meet Tabatha Jenkins.
71
00:05:47,045 --> 00:05:49,809
She's new to the co-op as well. Kind of.
72
00:05:51,116 --> 00:05:55,553
She spent all last year as
a foreign exchange student out in Europe.
73
00:05:56,154 --> 00:05:58,179
Cool. Where did you go?
74
00:05:58,290 --> 00:05:59,257
Brussels.
75
00:06:00,492 --> 00:06:05,520
Benjamin is from Saltair,
and he likes to write sci-fi stories.
76
00:06:13,905 --> 00:06:16,237
Keefe is so dang awesome.
77
00:06:16,808 --> 00:06:17,797
Yeah, he seems pretty cool.
78
00:06:19,044 --> 00:06:20,602
I write French mysteries, you know.
79
00:06:21,646 --> 00:06:23,170
How long you been doing that?
80
00:06:23,348 --> 00:06:27,114
Mainly the last six months.
I write about a stable hand named Pierre.
81
00:06:30,422 --> 00:06:32,287
Can I borrow some money
to buy some tampons?
82
00:06:32,391 --> 00:06:36,350
All my cash is still in euros and I haven't
had time to change it over yet.
83
00:06:40,699 --> 00:06:41,996
What? Yeah, sure.
84
00:06:45,404 --> 00:06:48,202
Thanks. I owe you big time.
85
00:06:49,107 --> 00:06:50,074
Don't worry about it.
86
00:07:08,493 --> 00:07:12,930
Sorry, they didn't have any, so I just
bought some treats for me and Lonnie.
87
00:07:13,799 --> 00:07:15,391
Hey, can we come sit by you?
88
00:07:16,201 --> 00:07:19,295
Hey, Lonnie, bring our stuff.
Let's sit over here.
89
00:07:29,714 --> 00:07:32,547
Benjamin, this is Lonnie Donaho.
90
00:07:32,651 --> 00:07:35,142
- Hi.
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
91
00:07:35,253 --> 00:07:39,053
He has his own video production company,
Donaho Studios.
92
00:07:39,157 --> 00:07:42,320
Since I've been away,
he's been shooting my work on weekends.
93
00:07:42,427 --> 00:07:45,590
I sent him my latest installments via e-mail.
94
00:07:45,697 --> 00:07:49,963
It's been an amazing experience.
95
00:07:50,235 --> 00:07:52,032
How many films have you made?
96
00:07:52,137 --> 00:07:54,435
Mmm. Eighty-three.
97
00:07:54,940 --> 00:07:56,771
But some are just trailers.
98
00:07:56,875 --> 00:07:59,241
Dang. That's a lot.
99
00:07:59,444 --> 00:08:01,309
Do you produce only Tabatha's work?
100
00:08:01,413 --> 00:08:04,780
No. I do all kind of movies.
101
00:08:05,116 --> 00:08:11,612
Horse movies, romance, soaps, fantasies...
102
00:08:11,723 --> 00:08:15,682
Hey, Lonnie, can you squirt me
some of that lotion we just bought?
103
00:08:24,503 --> 00:08:26,801
Will you give me a hand massage?
104
00:08:29,875 --> 00:08:30,864
Yeah.
105
00:08:32,677 --> 00:08:34,201
Yeah, I can do that.
106
00:09:33,538 --> 00:09:36,701
You guys are so lucky
you get to be roommates.
107
00:09:36,975 --> 00:09:38,499
Mine just wants to eat.
108
00:09:38,743 --> 00:09:42,645
Hey. I don't think you're allowed to be here.
Mr. Keefe is right next door.
109
00:09:44,382 --> 00:09:47,112
Relax, Benjamin,
I just want to get to know you better.
110
00:09:51,456 --> 00:09:53,720
So, when are you gonna let me read
one of your stories?
111
00:09:54,459 --> 00:09:58,190
I don't know.
I usually don't let people read my stuff.
112
00:09:58,296 --> 00:09:59,263
Why not?
113
00:09:59,531 --> 00:10:02,193
I've let my mom read a few,
but they've just made her cry.
114
00:10:03,301 --> 00:10:05,428
Most people just get sicked out
and stop reading.
115
00:10:05,637 --> 00:10:08,231
Really? Are there romantic sequences?
116
00:10:08,707 --> 00:10:12,609
No. None of that crap. It's just some mild
swearing and sci-fi violence.
117
00:10:12,711 --> 00:10:15,202
Well, have you tried posting
any of your stories online?
118
00:10:15,580 --> 00:10:17,980
Yeah. But everybody can do that, you know.
119
00:10:18,083 --> 00:10:19,846
I want to get published for real.
120
00:10:19,985 --> 00:10:23,682
Ronald Chevalier had his first trilogy
published when he was 15.
121
00:10:24,322 --> 00:10:28,088
Well, you'll never get anywhere
by just letting your mom read your work.
122
00:10:40,338 --> 00:10:43,307
You can read this. It's called Yeast Lords
123
00:10:57,822 --> 00:11:00,347
The Nad Lab was a cold,
white room
124
00:11:00,458 --> 00:11:02,653
Bronco, the last of the Yeast Lords,
125
00:11:02,761 --> 00:11:05,662
lay spread-eagle,
strapped to a medical pod
126
00:11:05,764 --> 00:11:09,222
Someone had stolen his yeast,
and he had gone totally ape-sh
127
00:11:11,803 --> 00:11:13,771
What the crap?
128
00:11:16,675 --> 00:11:19,166
Oh, my... My gems!
129
00:11:19,310 --> 00:11:23,076
Sorry, Bronco.
We had to borrow one of your gonads.
130
00:11:23,782 --> 00:11:27,115
Daysius. I should've known it was you.
131
00:11:27,218 --> 00:11:29,345
Oh, I'm not the real Lord Daysius.
132
00:11:29,454 --> 00:11:32,719
My name is Dennis.
I'm one of his many clones.
133
00:11:32,824 --> 00:11:36,726
We're all very sorry.
Lord Daysius sends his regards.
134
00:11:36,828 --> 00:11:40,059
But we're investigating ways
to strengthen the military.
135
00:11:40,165 --> 00:11:43,396
Your gonad is being used for research.
136
00:11:43,968 --> 00:11:45,663
You took my nads.
137
00:11:45,804 --> 00:11:47,704
We only took one.
138
00:11:47,806 --> 00:11:49,706
You took my nads, Dennis.
139
00:11:49,841 --> 00:11:53,504
I know you're upset,
but we plan to give it back.
140
00:11:53,678 --> 00:11:55,737
We'll be done with it very soon.
141
00:11:56,247 --> 00:12:00,411
Darn you, flippin' Daysius.
142
00:12:04,789 --> 00:12:07,656
Get away from me with that. You hear me?
143
00:12:07,826 --> 00:12:11,887
Relax, Bronco. This will ease the pain.
144
00:12:16,901 --> 00:12:18,994
You release me, my cat's hungry.
145
00:12:21,139 --> 00:12:22,231
Release me!
146
00:12:29,481 --> 00:12:32,382
You tell Lord Daysius
to eat the corn out of my crap.
147
00:13:00,512 --> 00:13:03,970
Good night, Benjamin.
I really need to think about this one.
148
00:13:19,898 --> 00:13:21,229
Program.
149
00:13:21,833 --> 00:13:22,800
Program.
150
00:13:52,363 --> 00:13:53,489
Before we commence the activities,
151
00:13:53,598 --> 00:13:56,158
I'd like to introduce you
to a very special person
152
00:13:58,102 --> 00:14:03,597
He is a man who has repeatedly
probed our imaginations for decades
153
00:14:04,909 --> 00:14:11,109
A man whose canon of work has pushed
the envelope of science and reason
154
00:14:12,884 --> 00:14:19,187
A man who has created such realistic
characters, I call them friends
155
00:14:19,490 --> 00:14:21,481
Chevalier.
He's talking about Ronald Chevalier.
156
00:14:22,260 --> 00:14:23,249
Without further ado,
157
00:14:24,062 --> 00:14:28,328
I give you one of the greatest
science fiction authors of our time,
158
00:14:30,869 --> 00:14:34,396
Dr Ronald Chevalier
159
00:14:43,248 --> 00:14:45,045
Thank you. So good to see you, Cletus.
160
00:14:53,658 --> 00:14:55,785
Greetings and salutations
161
00:14:56,527 --> 00:15:02,090
It is such an honor to be in the midst
of so many juvescent ripe minds
162
00:15:03,868 --> 00:15:08,168
When I was your age,
I had just completed my first trilogy,
163
00:15:08,606 --> 00:15:13,373
a body of work you now know
as The Cyborg Harpies.
164
00:15:14,545 --> 00:15:16,376
- I love you, Ronald!
- Thank you
165
00:15:17,749 --> 00:15:20,775
But what many people fail to recognize
166
00:15:20,885 --> 00:15:26,482
is that I created over 49 different
pieces of cover art for that trilogy
167
00:15:27,625 --> 00:15:28,592
No way.
168
00:15:39,570 --> 00:15:44,564
In this first piece, we see an early
rendering of a harpy named Linda
169
00:15:46,210 --> 00:15:51,842
Here, she uses her knowledge of lasers
to rupture the crust of a distant moon
170
00:15:54,052 --> 00:15:57,419
Here is a detail of the ruptured moon crust
171
00:15:58,256 --> 00:16:00,986
'"Must rupture the moon crust, '"
she's thinking
172
00:16:03,461 --> 00:16:07,090
This is a piece that came to me in a dream
when I was 11
173
00:16:08,433 --> 00:16:09,866
I call it Migration,
174
00:16:10,635 --> 00:16:15,504
and it depicts a fleet of harpies
synchronizing their mammary cannons
175
00:16:15,640 --> 00:16:17,267
to create laser-rain
176
00:16:19,344 --> 00:16:21,335
A hard rain's gonna fall
177
00:16:23,548 --> 00:16:25,846
And finally we have a youngling
178
00:16:26,050 --> 00:16:28,985
trying to penetrate
the secrets of the human mind
179
00:16:30,388 --> 00:16:34,188
You won't do it like that, youngling
You must use friendship
180
00:16:40,832 --> 00:16:41,890
Thank you
181
00:16:43,034 --> 00:16:46,492
For the first time ever,
it is my privilege to announce
182
00:16:47,338 --> 00:16:49,704
Prism Publishing will be hosting a contest
183
00:16:49,874 --> 00:16:52,434
for the best work submitted at this festival
184
00:16:53,144 --> 00:16:57,604
It will be judged by a panel
of industry professionals,
185
00:16:57,982 --> 00:16:59,381
including myself,
186
00:17:00,685 --> 00:17:05,019
and the winner will receive
a 1,000-copy release of their work
187
00:17:05,189 --> 00:17:07,749
at selected bookstores nationwide
188
00:17:13,097 --> 00:17:19,935
In addition, I will personally
create an original piece of cover art
189
00:17:20,538 --> 00:17:22,733
to accompany the winning story
190
00:17:26,144 --> 00:17:30,740
May the glistening chrome of
the Borg Queen shed her light upon us all
191
00:17:34,685 --> 00:17:35,652
Amen
192
00:18:10,088 --> 00:18:14,149
I'm assuming that most of you are here
for two main reasons.
193
00:18:14,592 --> 00:18:17,959
Alpha, you love to write fantasy fiction,
194
00:18:18,830 --> 00:18:23,494
and beta, the character names
in your stories are suffering.
195
00:18:24,402 --> 00:18:29,101
We're going to begin with a little game
which will demonstrate a theory of mine
196
00:18:29,207 --> 00:18:33,166
known as "The Power of the Suffix."
197
00:18:34,479 --> 00:18:38,779
You. Give me the name
of one of the protagonists in your fantasies.
198
00:18:39,650 --> 00:18:40,878
Nebuchadnezzar.
199
00:18:41,018 --> 00:18:41,985
Oh, boy.
200
00:18:42,653 --> 00:18:43,620
Very original.
201
00:18:44,322 --> 00:18:45,789
I've heard that one before.
202
00:18:46,524 --> 00:18:49,687
But don't worry, need thou not be afraid,
203
00:18:50,061 --> 00:18:55,931
for we can turn a humdrum,
forgettable name like Nebuchadnezzar
204
00:18:56,300 --> 00:18:58,564
into something magical like this...
205
00:19:00,638 --> 00:19:01,832
Nebucoronius.
206
00:19:05,476 --> 00:19:06,602
And it's that easy.
207
00:19:07,678 --> 00:19:14,345
We can add "onius," "ainous," or "anous"
208
00:19:14,452 --> 00:19:17,080
to just about anything,
and it becomes magical.
209
00:19:17,889 --> 00:19:20,881
You. Give me the name
of one of your central protags.
210
00:19:21,726 --> 00:19:22,693
Bronco.
211
00:19:23,094 --> 00:19:24,891
What is he, a centaur?
212
00:19:24,996 --> 00:19:25,985
No.
213
00:19:26,097 --> 00:19:29,066
Does he shape-shift into equine form ever?
214
00:19:29,167 --> 00:19:30,464
No, he's just a man.
215
00:19:31,068 --> 00:19:34,367
Well, then, I would...
I would lose the "C" immediately,
216
00:19:34,839 --> 00:19:38,297
and I'd replace it with an "L." Bronlonius.
217
00:19:39,844 --> 00:19:41,744
And if he's part of a traveling clan,
218
00:19:41,846 --> 00:19:44,406
his clansfellow could call him
Bronlo for short,
219
00:19:44,916 --> 00:19:46,543
except on formal occasions.
220
00:19:46,951 --> 00:19:47,940
Yes?
221
00:19:48,052 --> 00:19:50,020
What about names found in troll colonies?
222
00:19:51,389 --> 00:19:53,323
In troll colonies,
well, that's a different matter.
223
00:19:54,625 --> 00:19:55,922
Give me an example.
224
00:19:56,894 --> 00:19:58,725
One of my trolls is named Teacup.
225
00:20:01,165 --> 00:20:05,101
I don't like it.
I would go with Trojainous every time.
226
00:20:07,638 --> 00:20:08,662
Yes?
227
00:20:08,773 --> 00:20:10,638
But I still like the name Teacup better.
228
00:20:10,775 --> 00:20:11,742
It's not a...
229
00:20:11,842 --> 00:20:16,279
It's not a question of liking it better,
it's just I'm, as an author,
230
00:20:16,380 --> 00:20:19,008
picturing myself as a troll mother.
231
00:20:19,283 --> 00:20:23,014
I have just given birth
to a litter of troll cubs.
232
00:20:23,287 --> 00:20:27,656
They're covered in placentae,
pawing at my many teats
233
00:20:27,825 --> 00:20:30,817
for the vital, life-giving colostrum.
234
00:20:31,028 --> 00:20:35,397
I'm not thinking, "Hmm, Teacup," am I?
235
00:20:35,833 --> 00:20:38,927
It's just not believable.
236
00:20:39,036 --> 00:20:42,528
And if I don't believe it,
the reader doesn't believe it.
237
00:20:43,341 --> 00:20:47,368
Trojainous. Troka Kahn. Trody.
238
00:20:49,080 --> 00:20:50,411
Names in this vein.
239
00:20:50,648 --> 00:20:52,707
If female, Trojana.
240
00:20:53,818 --> 00:20:54,785
Yes?
241
00:20:55,586 --> 00:20:59,352
I thought trolls were supposed
to be named after resources, like trees.
242
00:21:00,992 --> 00:21:03,426
Are you telling me
what trolls are named after?
243
00:21:05,296 --> 00:21:08,265
You do realize I am the author of Troll, Ho
244
00:21:08,833 --> 00:21:11,734
Because it all boils down to species.
245
00:21:12,036 --> 00:21:15,494
Are they tree-dwellers,
bridge-dwellers, subterranean?
246
00:21:15,940 --> 00:21:19,467
A troll wouldn't come up
with a name like Teacup, a little girl would.
247
00:21:21,846 --> 00:21:23,211
Trojainous.
248
00:21:26,851 --> 00:21:28,079
How was the workshop?
249
00:21:29,153 --> 00:21:32,247
I don't know.
Chevalier seems kind of full of himself.
250
00:21:32,356 --> 00:21:33,380
He's kind of lame.
251
00:21:33,591 --> 00:21:36,492
Really? I think he's gorgeous.
252
00:21:37,395 --> 00:21:40,387
He's not gonna like my story,
the names are all wrong.
253
00:21:40,765 --> 00:21:42,323
Oh, I don't think so.
254
00:21:44,135 --> 00:21:45,102
What do you mean?
255
00:21:45,303 --> 00:21:49,239
Well, I thought your story was really good.
256
00:21:50,207 --> 00:21:51,174
Really?
257
00:21:51,542 --> 00:21:54,511
I thought you didn't like it.
Last night you seemed offended.
258
00:21:55,346 --> 00:22:00,409
No. I... I actually thought
it was kind of amazing.
259
00:22:02,253 --> 00:22:04,551
What inspired it?
Some weird surgery you had?
260
00:22:06,891 --> 00:22:09,621
I wanted to write a story for my dad.
261
00:22:09,727 --> 00:22:12,423
He kind of died when I was young.
262
00:22:13,798 --> 00:22:16,494
Oh, gosh, I'm so sorry.
263
00:22:16,967 --> 00:22:21,995
He was real brave.
He was a game warden, an explorer.
264
00:22:22,239 --> 00:22:26,869
I see. So Bronco is kind of like your dad,
265
00:22:27,445 --> 00:22:31,142
and his gonads are his seed,
which means the gonads are you.
266
00:22:31,549 --> 00:22:33,176
That's why they're so precious.
267
00:22:34,218 --> 00:22:36,448
Well, you know, like all great writers,
268
00:22:36,554 --> 00:22:38,784
you're gonna have to go through
a lot of crap,
269
00:22:38,923 --> 00:22:44,520
but someday your junk will be seen by all,
and it will be awesome.
270
00:22:44,962 --> 00:22:46,793
I truly believe that.
271
00:22:49,066 --> 00:22:50,033
Thanks, Tabatha.
272
00:22:59,643 --> 00:23:00,610
Chevalier.
273
00:23:01,178 --> 00:23:04,875
Ronald, how's
the conference going Any contenders?
274
00:23:05,583 --> 00:23:08,746
Well, let me read you a passage
from what I'm reading right now.
275
00:23:10,554 --> 00:23:13,421
"Pierre used to be a jockey in college.
276
00:23:13,557 --> 00:23:16,458
"He loves to have rice pudding with his tea.
277
00:23:16,794 --> 00:23:19,262
"He loves solving animal murders.
278
00:23:19,797 --> 00:23:25,429
"Pierre has two horses,
Jacques and Paris France, both girls.
279
00:23:26,036 --> 00:23:28,732
"He rides Paris France
on the brick roads in London,
280
00:23:28,839 --> 00:23:30,932
"looking for mysterious things.
281
00:23:31,509 --> 00:23:33,977
"He rides Jacques for pleasure."
282
00:23:35,179 --> 00:23:38,945
Merve, never make me do
another one of these things again.
283
00:23:39,049 --> 00:23:40,573
These kids are a joke.
284
00:23:40,818 --> 00:23:42,376
Ronald, as your publisher,
285
00:23:42,686 --> 00:23:45,849
it's not a bad idea to get in touch
with your audience once in a while
286
00:23:48,959 --> 00:23:49,926
All right.
287
00:23:52,496 --> 00:23:56,125
Listen, Merve, did you have a chance
to look at the Sandcastle Diaries yet?
288
00:23:56,233 --> 00:24:00,260
Ronald, I'll cut to the chase It's horrible
289
00:24:00,371 --> 00:24:02,635
We can't publish it It won't sell
290
00:24:02,873 --> 00:24:05,535
Unless you can give us something
worth taking to print,
291
00:24:05,643 --> 00:24:07,201
we're just gonna have to let you go
292
00:24:07,378 --> 00:24:08,606
Merve, Merve, wait.
293
00:24:09,647 --> 00:24:11,012
Moon Fetus
294
00:24:12,183 --> 00:24:15,209
A fetus is found on a moon base.
295
00:24:19,023 --> 00:24:20,320
That's the premise.
296
00:24:20,891 --> 00:24:22,051
I'll talk to you later
297
00:25:07,605 --> 00:25:11,473
Bronco cried out in pain
as he sat on the shore of Goose Lake,
298
00:25:11,809 --> 00:25:13,640
trying to sew his junk back on
299
00:25:25,623 --> 00:25:28,023
- Excuse me.
- What?
300
00:25:28,125 --> 00:25:29,490
Is this your pudding?
301
00:25:29,693 --> 00:25:30,682
What do you want?
302
00:25:31,896 --> 00:25:32,863
Hey!
303
00:25:34,398 --> 00:25:36,093
That was my backup nad.
304
00:25:36,934 --> 00:25:37,901
I'm sorry.
305
00:25:38,502 --> 00:25:40,333
Was it a fancy pudding?
306
00:25:47,144 --> 00:25:48,111
I know who you are.
307
00:25:49,580 --> 00:25:50,547
Say what?
308
00:25:51,248 --> 00:25:55,947
Our fathers fought valiantly
and were victorious in the Battle of Shiroh.
309
00:25:57,855 --> 00:26:00,153
I was but a child then,
maybe you don't remember.
310
00:26:01,058 --> 00:26:04,459
When your father died
at the hands of Daysius,
311
00:26:04,962 --> 00:26:07,396
your mother wept so hard
that her milk dried.
312
00:26:08,732 --> 00:26:12,566
To keep you alive,
we shared suckle at my mother's breast.
313
00:26:15,072 --> 00:26:16,300
Vanaya?
314
00:26:17,308 --> 00:26:19,674
- It is I.
- I don't believe that.
315
00:26:21,278 --> 00:26:22,609
My family is dead.
316
00:26:23,113 --> 00:26:25,104
My brother and I have been forced
to work in the yeast factories
317
00:26:25,215 --> 00:26:26,739
ever since the epidemic.
318
00:26:26,850 --> 00:26:28,750
- You have a brother?
- Yes.
319
00:26:29,253 --> 00:26:30,220
His name is Kanaya.
320
00:26:32,256 --> 00:26:33,245
He doesn't speak.
321
00:26:34,425 --> 00:26:37,155
But he's very handy
with powders and gizmos and such.
322
00:26:37,261 --> 00:26:38,353
He can build anything.
323
00:26:39,563 --> 00:26:41,190
What y'all... What y'all want from me?
324
00:26:42,833 --> 00:26:44,198
Let us come with you.
325
00:26:44,935 --> 00:26:48,336
Together, we can destroy
Lord Daysius once and for all.
326
00:26:49,106 --> 00:26:53,736
We shall begin a new yeast colony,
just like when we were children.
327
00:26:55,446 --> 00:26:59,542
Well, that's my dream,
but there's only one problem.
328
00:27:00,818 --> 00:27:03,309
They got my reproductives, Vanaya.
329
00:27:03,787 --> 00:27:07,018
Daysius is gonna build himself an army
using my seed.
330
00:27:08,092 --> 00:27:11,584
I can't let that happen.
His power's become unruly.
331
00:27:11,929 --> 00:27:15,421
You know how weird that'd be,
a bunch of gorgeous yeast lords
332
00:27:15,933 --> 00:27:20,336
with my face, running around,
making dang fools of themselves?
333
00:27:21,338 --> 00:27:23,636
I'm sorry, Vanaya, I have to do this alone.
334
00:27:24,575 --> 00:27:26,805
You and Kanaya would just be dead weight,
big time.
335
00:27:27,177 --> 00:27:28,235
Gotta cut bait on this deal.
336
00:27:28,345 --> 00:27:30,905
Krolaxx, come on. Come on, Krolaxx.
337
00:27:31,515 --> 00:27:34,450
We know where
Daysius is hiding your yeast, Bronco.
338
00:27:34,785 --> 00:27:35,752
Yeah, right.
339
00:27:35,853 --> 00:27:39,914
I can smell a cache
of yeast cakes 40 mile off.
340
00:27:40,157 --> 00:27:42,955
It's being held in
a mountain fortress just north of here.
341
00:27:43,260 --> 00:27:44,227
I can show you.
342
00:27:44,928 --> 00:27:47,692
Kanaya and I just escaped
from the yeast factory there.
343
00:27:49,033 --> 00:27:52,969
If you don't believe me, smell my breath.
344
00:28:07,284 --> 00:28:09,548
Tastes like homemade licorice.
345
00:28:10,020 --> 00:28:11,317
Take me there.
346
00:28:12,856 --> 00:28:15,086
Take me to your yeast factory.
347
00:28:16,493 --> 00:28:18,757
I am your soldier.
348
00:28:24,001 --> 00:28:27,061
I know
you like wearing your dad's old clothes,
349
00:28:27,538 --> 00:28:32,066
but while you were at Cletus Fest,
I got you some new shoes.
350
00:28:33,243 --> 00:28:35,973
Only $5, clearance sale at Haymart.
351
00:28:42,419 --> 00:28:43,716
These are girls' shoes, Mom.
352
00:28:46,490 --> 00:28:48,151
Oh, shoot.
353
00:28:48,792 --> 00:28:50,817
I thought they were skipper shoes.
354
00:28:52,329 --> 00:28:53,956
How about some good news?
355
00:28:55,099 --> 00:28:57,727
I got really inspired about my collection,
356
00:28:57,835 --> 00:29:00,395
and I came up with a bunch of new designs.
357
00:29:04,775 --> 00:29:06,834
Do you mind if I run a few of them by you?
358
00:29:07,478 --> 00:29:08,445
Okay.
359
00:29:09,179 --> 00:29:13,479
I've changed the name of my collection
to Decent Beginnings.
360
00:29:14,251 --> 00:29:16,981
I liked it 'cause I thought
it had a wholesome ring,
361
00:29:17,087 --> 00:29:20,079
but I was hoping
it could appeal to a younger market.
362
00:29:21,158 --> 00:29:26,152
Now, my first one is called Front Pew.
363
00:29:26,697 --> 00:29:30,656
Now what I did was I extended
the hemline down like that,
364
00:29:30,768 --> 00:29:33,236
so it brings the attention
back up to the eyes.
365
00:29:35,572 --> 00:29:38,700
And this one, it's breakfast-inspired.
366
00:29:39,910 --> 00:29:42,037
It's called Simply Cinnamon.
367
00:29:43,046 --> 00:29:46,982
I'm gonna make it out of some beach
towels with some burlap fringe.
368
00:29:50,821 --> 00:29:53,483
This one is called Righteous Dew.
369
00:29:54,224 --> 00:29:57,057
Your father would've just loved this one.
370
00:29:59,763 --> 00:30:02,231
This one's called Reachable Dream,
371
00:30:03,233 --> 00:30:07,670
because all of our dreams are reachable,
Benjy, even yours.
372
00:30:29,326 --> 00:30:31,726
Hi. Welcome to LeVonne's.
373
00:30:31,862 --> 00:30:33,420
Can I look at that salmon gown?
374
00:30:35,299 --> 00:30:36,266
Certainly.
375
00:30:43,106 --> 00:30:48,066
This is a very practical design from
LeVonne's new Sunset Plains edition.
376
00:30:48,178 --> 00:30:49,202
Well, how much is it?
377
00:30:51,048 --> 00:30:54,279
This treasure right here
is on sale today for $79.95.
378
00:30:54,585 --> 00:30:56,348
Well, that's a rip-off.
379
00:31:02,526 --> 00:31:04,824
Hey. What are you guys doing here?
380
00:31:04,995 --> 00:31:08,158
Lonnie's stepsister runs
the Navajo Taco stand.
381
00:31:08,999 --> 00:31:10,432
They make a really good taco.
382
00:31:18,508 --> 00:31:20,738
So, I noticed you left Cletus early.
383
00:31:20,844 --> 00:31:24,610
Yeah, I had to come back and
help my mom with the trade show.
384
00:31:26,516 --> 00:31:28,211
When do we get our manuscripts back?
385
00:31:28,719 --> 00:31:31,813
Well, we got ours at the end of camp.
Maybe they'll mail yours.
386
00:31:31,922 --> 00:31:33,150
But don't you have another copy?
387
00:31:33,257 --> 00:31:35,782
Because I really think Lonnie should read it.
388
00:31:36,026 --> 00:31:38,153
He has connections
in the audiovisual industry.
389
00:31:38,262 --> 00:31:41,163
He might know someone
that could help get you published.
390
00:31:41,832 --> 00:31:43,197
Are you serious?
391
00:31:43,300 --> 00:31:44,460
Mmm.
392
00:31:44,701 --> 00:31:47,932
Well, it was so nice
to see you, Benjamin. Bye.
393
00:31:48,038 --> 00:31:49,266
Oh, okay.
394
00:32:03,320 --> 00:32:04,344
Yes.
395
00:32:10,527 --> 00:32:11,494
Bronco.
396
00:32:13,697 --> 00:32:15,631
I can do better.
397
00:32:16,466 --> 00:32:17,831
Broncanuss.
398
00:32:22,706 --> 00:32:23,934
Broncaho.
399
00:32:25,075 --> 00:32:26,235
Not quite.
400
00:32:30,714 --> 00:32:31,942
Brutus.
401
00:32:37,454 --> 00:32:38,421
Forgive me.
402
00:32:42,926 --> 00:32:43,893
Cyclops there.
403
00:32:44,761 --> 00:32:45,728
Cyclops there.
404
00:32:49,132 --> 00:32:52,124
Brutus and Venonka surveyed
the yeast factory,
405
00:32:52,235 --> 00:32:54,533
looking for an Achilles'heel
406
00:32:55,205 --> 00:32:56,263
There was none
407
00:32:57,007 --> 00:33:00,807
Cyclops there. Cyclops there.
408
00:33:02,346 --> 00:33:04,507
Cyclops there.
409
00:33:05,248 --> 00:33:06,215
Turrets.
410
00:33:08,185 --> 00:33:09,948
Moon buggies.
411
00:33:12,923 --> 00:33:14,823
Oh, my holy crap.
412
00:33:15,392 --> 00:33:17,223
Surveillance does.
413
00:33:17,728 --> 00:33:18,695
I hate those.
414
00:33:19,863 --> 00:33:24,357
This is ridiculous. That's the most
well-guarded yeast factory I've ever seen.
415
00:33:24,968 --> 00:33:27,459
Kenonka. Kenonka.
416
00:33:28,372 --> 00:33:30,237
Show me your bag of secrets.
417
00:33:32,909 --> 00:33:34,536
What's all this crap?
418
00:33:34,678 --> 00:33:38,170
I thought you said he was good at making
bombs and robots and stuff.
419
00:33:38,281 --> 00:33:42,012
What I meant to say was
he likes collecting things.
420
00:33:43,020 --> 00:33:43,987
What's he doing now?
421
00:33:44,488 --> 00:33:47,651
I don't know.
He must have found something.
422
00:33:47,758 --> 00:33:49,282
(SIGHS) I'm not seeing it.
423
00:33:50,060 --> 00:33:51,357
I'm not seeing results.
424
00:33:51,995 --> 00:33:54,020
All I see is a bunch of organic waste.
425
00:33:55,465 --> 00:33:58,025
What did he find, the genius?
426
00:34:01,638 --> 00:34:03,128
Wait a sec.
427
00:34:11,248 --> 00:34:12,579
Well, it's not a clean yeast.
428
00:34:14,017 --> 00:34:18,010
It's just a fungus beef
sharing a few yeast-like properties.
429
00:34:21,825 --> 00:34:23,918
'Tis ripe and delicious, though.
430
00:34:24,995 --> 00:34:26,087
Watch this.
431
00:34:33,837 --> 00:34:35,737
All right, let's give it a little test.
432
00:34:37,808 --> 00:34:38,775
Not bad.
433
00:34:40,310 --> 00:34:42,278
It's pretty good yeast.
434
00:34:43,180 --> 00:34:44,772
This isn't bad.
435
00:34:46,249 --> 00:34:47,739
This is pretty good.
436
00:34:47,851 --> 00:34:51,218
It's not concentrate,
but it's pretty darn good.
437
00:34:51,788 --> 00:34:53,278
Ha ha, whoopee!
438
00:34:55,792 --> 00:34:56,759
I like it.
439
00:34:58,562 --> 00:34:59,551
I like it.
440
00:35:23,487 --> 00:35:26,979
Hey, Benjamin, come here.
I want you to meet someone.
441
00:35:31,895 --> 00:35:33,123
Benjamin.
442
00:35:33,697 --> 00:35:37,531
I want you to meet Dusty,
your new Guardian Angel.
443
00:35:37,701 --> 00:35:38,668
What?
444
00:35:38,835 --> 00:35:40,860
Well, I noticed you didn't have any friends,
445
00:35:41,471 --> 00:35:45,032
so I signed you up
for the Guardian Angel program at church.
446
00:35:47,010 --> 00:35:50,537
I thought maybe you two could go out
in the back and get to know each other
447
00:35:50,647 --> 00:35:52,638
while I grill up some cod.
448
00:35:55,585 --> 00:35:57,314
Oh, my word.
449
00:36:01,424 --> 00:36:02,391
That's all right.
450
00:36:03,927 --> 00:36:06,088
Maybe I have some paper towel.
451
00:36:07,097 --> 00:36:08,496
Oh, my goodness.
452
00:36:23,180 --> 00:36:24,875
Your mom's smoking hot.
453
00:36:25,949 --> 00:36:26,916
What?
454
00:36:27,050 --> 00:36:28,108
Shh!
455
00:36:37,861 --> 00:36:38,828
What is that?
456
00:36:39,496 --> 00:36:41,930
It's rat poison and some of my poo.
457
00:36:42,032 --> 00:36:44,660
Sick. Is it lethal?
458
00:36:45,168 --> 00:36:48,331
No. I don't know. Maybe.
459
00:36:50,540 --> 00:36:52,474
Here, you try it.
460
00:36:52,576 --> 00:36:53,634
I can't.
461
00:36:53,743 --> 00:36:55,472
Dude, it's the circle of life. Go for it.
462
00:37:22,939 --> 00:37:24,907
Centaur lover
463
00:37:29,145 --> 00:37:31,443
Centaur lover
464
00:37:36,386 --> 00:37:37,353
Chevalier.
465
00:37:37,487 --> 00:37:40,081
- Ronald, it's Merve
- Yes?
466
00:37:40,290 --> 00:37:43,259
I don't know where this came from,
but it's fantastic
467
00:37:43,627 --> 00:37:45,219
Really? You like it?
468
00:37:45,328 --> 00:37:48,559
I haven't even finished reading it,
I've already approved it for print
469
00:37:48,665 --> 00:37:49,632
That's amazing.
470
00:37:49,799 --> 00:37:53,667
I mean, it's a little jarring in places,
but I think it's gonna sell really well
471
00:37:53,770 --> 00:37:54,862
Are you sure, Merve?
472
00:37:54,971 --> 00:37:58,065
I've just completed the cover art
for Star Bracelets
473
00:37:58,174 --> 00:38:00,472
No, no, no, I want you to start doing
preliminary sketches
474
00:38:00,577 --> 00:38:02,841
of Brutus and his dog, Balzaak
475
00:38:03,413 --> 00:38:06,041
Yes. Yes, I'll get right on it.
476
00:38:06,149 --> 00:38:09,312
You're back to your old self
Congratulations, Ronald
477
00:38:09,786 --> 00:38:11,981
- Thank you, Merve.
- No, thank you
478
00:38:18,061 --> 00:38:19,892
- Mom.
- What?
479
00:38:19,996 --> 00:38:21,486
You're not bleeding, it's just water.
480
00:38:22,198 --> 00:38:23,165
What?
481
00:38:32,275 --> 00:38:33,503
My gelee insert.
482
00:38:34,711 --> 00:38:36,076
You're gonna be okay.
483
00:38:39,816 --> 00:38:40,840
Hello?
484
00:38:40,950 --> 00:38:43,111
May I please speak
to Mr Benjamin Purvis?
485
00:38:43,987 --> 00:38:44,954
Tabatha?
486
00:38:45,055 --> 00:38:47,216
I'm calling you on behalf of Donaho Studios
487
00:38:47,357 --> 00:38:51,851
Lonnie thinks he wants
to produce Yeast Lords
488
00:38:52,929 --> 00:38:55,056
Are you serious?
He wants to make it into a movie?
489
00:38:55,165 --> 00:38:58,566
Mmm-hmm. It's gonna be
our next major motion picture.
490
00:38:58,668 --> 00:39:01,159
We'd like for you to come down
to Donaho Studios to discuss.
491
00:39:01,571 --> 00:39:04,506
Also, could you play a role in the movie
that we're shooting right now?
492
00:39:04,607 --> 00:39:07,201
The sooner we finish it,
the sooner that we can start yours.
493
00:39:08,745 --> 00:39:09,712
Yeah.
494
00:39:10,180 --> 00:39:13,581
Yeah, totally. I'd be honored.
What's it about?
495
00:39:13,717 --> 00:39:16,345
It's a romantic story I wrote.
You would be perfect.
496
00:39:16,453 --> 00:39:18,318
And also, since your mom
works for LeVonne's,
497
00:39:18,421 --> 00:39:20,321
do you think you could
bring some nightgowns?
498
00:39:20,423 --> 00:39:22,516
'Cause we are in desperate need
of sexy nightwear.
499
00:39:23,093 --> 00:39:24,560
That's fine. Yeah, I could do that.
500
00:39:25,228 --> 00:39:27,253
Okay, great. So, we'll see you soon.
501
00:39:27,364 --> 00:39:31,198
And congratulations, Benjamin.
This is a very big deal.
502
00:39:45,448 --> 00:39:47,109
Are these the nighties?
503
00:39:47,317 --> 00:39:49,683
Yeah. We have to be really careful
with them, though.
504
00:39:53,223 --> 00:39:54,690
Hey, Lonnie, what are my lines?
505
00:39:54,791 --> 00:39:56,656
Okay, guys,
we've just got two more scenes,
506
00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:58,421
and then this trailer will be done.
507
00:40:00,997 --> 00:40:02,225
Headphone, please.
508
00:40:10,774 --> 00:40:11,832
And...
509
00:40:14,110 --> 00:40:15,077
Action.
510
00:41:01,658 --> 00:41:03,853
Mmm. You like?
511
00:41:11,100 --> 00:41:12,067
Cut!
512
00:41:13,269 --> 00:41:16,966
Lonnie! You can't do that.
That's an $80 Don Carlos.
513
00:41:17,140 --> 00:41:18,471
Excuse me?
514
00:41:18,575 --> 00:41:20,702
I don't even think
we were supposed to take the tags off.
515
00:41:21,444 --> 00:41:24,811
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I can't do this.
This movie's gonna suck.
516
00:41:30,720 --> 00:41:32,153
Benjamin.
517
00:41:32,255 --> 00:41:33,916
No, Benjamin, wait, I'm sorry.
518
00:41:34,023 --> 00:41:35,650
Look, it was Lonnie's idea, not mine.
519
00:41:35,758 --> 00:41:38,488
And I'll have my people restore it
with scrap linens.
520
00:41:38,661 --> 00:41:40,561
Tabatha, me and my mom are
gonna be out, like, 100 bucks now.
521
00:41:40,663 --> 00:41:41,960
We can't afford that.
522
00:41:42,165 --> 00:41:43,530
Benjamin, look,
523
00:41:43,633 --> 00:41:47,399
Lonnie has come into
some serious cash lately.
524
00:41:48,238 --> 00:41:49,205
What does that mean?
525
00:41:50,073 --> 00:41:53,873
Benjamin, Lonnie wants
to pay you for Yeast Lords
526
00:41:55,211 --> 00:41:56,178
Are you serious?
527
00:41:56,479 --> 00:41:57,912
I'm dead serious.
528
00:41:58,014 --> 00:41:59,345
Yeast Lords is amazing,
529
00:41:59,449 --> 00:42:02,441
and it is definitely worth
at least a couple hundred bucks.
530
00:42:03,286 --> 00:42:06,050
Hey, Lonnie?
Tell him how much you're willing to pay.
531
00:42:06,723 --> 00:42:08,418
500, cash.
532
00:42:08,725 --> 00:42:09,692
500?
533
00:42:10,093 --> 00:42:11,754
What's wrong?
These guys owe you some money?
534
00:42:13,029 --> 00:42:13,996
No.
535
00:42:14,230 --> 00:42:15,857
Who's that guy?
536
00:42:17,667 --> 00:42:19,225
He's my Angel.
537
00:42:20,570 --> 00:42:22,470
Nice.
538
00:42:27,844 --> 00:42:29,505
So, do we have a deal or what?
539
00:42:32,615 --> 00:42:33,707
Yeah.
540
00:42:37,453 --> 00:42:38,852
Hi, guys.
541
00:42:41,057 --> 00:42:42,991
Did you catch any neat rocks?
542
00:42:43,726 --> 00:42:45,751
Yeah. It was fun.
543
00:42:49,098 --> 00:42:50,725
How about you, Duster?
544
00:42:52,402 --> 00:42:53,369
What?
545
00:43:25,969 --> 00:43:28,870
Bronco and Vanaya
began their assault on the yeast factory,
546
00:43:29,305 --> 00:43:33,139
but the yeast patty Bronco had previously
eaten started to make him feel like crap
547
00:44:05,708 --> 00:44:07,232
Bronco!
548
00:44:07,744 --> 00:44:10,577
We must stop that gunfire
before it kills Lord Bronco.
549
00:44:10,680 --> 00:44:13,148
Well, find something, Kanaya, anything.
550
00:44:24,861 --> 00:44:26,795
Well, not that, you idiot.
551
00:44:27,063 --> 00:44:28,894
That's just an old pudding.
552
00:44:42,912 --> 00:44:45,005
Bronco. Are you all right?
553
00:44:45,548 --> 00:44:46,606
What happened?
554
00:44:46,916 --> 00:44:49,146
The fungus beef,
it's poisoned your spine juice.
555
00:44:49,252 --> 00:44:50,719
We must get you out of here.
556
00:44:50,820 --> 00:44:54,415
I can't move.
My buttocks is completely numb.
557
00:45:01,631 --> 00:45:05,123
Oh, mother. A battle stag.
558
00:45:05,768 --> 00:45:07,497
I hate those.
559
00:45:12,675 --> 00:45:15,803
No! Run, Kanaya, run!
560
00:45:36,699 --> 00:45:39,668
No, Kanaya, no! Run away!
561
00:46:07,096 --> 00:46:08,825
And action.
562
00:46:15,538 --> 00:46:17,438
Are you all right, Vanaya?
563
00:46:19,509 --> 00:46:25,141
My brother.
He sacrificed himself, and for nothing.
564
00:46:26,082 --> 00:46:27,515
We are yeastless.
565
00:46:27,717 --> 00:46:29,480
We are yeastless.
566
00:46:29,719 --> 00:46:31,243
Easy, easy.
567
00:46:32,255 --> 00:46:34,120
Your brother loves you, Vanaya.
568
00:46:34,657 --> 00:46:35,988
He'll do anything for you.
569
00:46:37,226 --> 00:46:39,660
But Daysius has surely
destroyed him by now.
570
00:46:42,365 --> 00:46:43,764
He's the chosen one.
571
00:46:45,935 --> 00:46:48,165
He was born with flesh pockets.
572
00:46:49,672 --> 00:46:51,799
Haven't you read the prophecies?
573
00:46:52,208 --> 00:46:53,175
No.
574
00:46:53,609 --> 00:46:55,975
We must stop him, Bronco.
575
00:46:56,245 --> 00:46:58,805
Yes, but first
we must rest our bodies.
576
00:47:00,049 --> 00:47:02,609
Come, let's bed down for the eve.
577
00:47:03,452 --> 00:47:04,680
Okay.
578
00:47:06,823 --> 00:47:07,790
And...
579
00:47:09,091 --> 00:47:10,058
Cut!
580
00:47:14,730 --> 00:47:15,697
Lonnie.
581
00:47:16,399 --> 00:47:17,366
Lonnie.
582
00:47:17,500 --> 00:47:19,468
And there we go, I think. Is that good?
583
00:47:19,569 --> 00:47:20,593
Yes.
584
00:47:22,071 --> 00:47:24,699
Oh, my gosh, Lonnie, I think all
the changes you made to the script
585
00:47:24,807 --> 00:47:26,934
are so much better than the original.
586
00:47:27,043 --> 00:47:28,908
I mean, this will be one
of the few movies out there
587
00:47:29,011 --> 00:47:31,445
that is actually way better than the book.
588
00:48:11,621 --> 00:48:16,285
Without a doubt,
the best line I've ever written is this,
589
00:48:17,293 --> 00:48:20,091
'"Referring to her neck, she squawked,
590
00:48:20,363 --> 00:48:24,493
'"'This isn't a wart,
this is the chancellor of the galaxy
591
00:48:24,600 --> 00:48:25,897
'"'Now let us in"
592
00:48:31,407 --> 00:48:32,738
Next question
593
00:48:33,542 --> 00:48:34,509
Over here
594
00:48:35,544 --> 00:48:37,978
In the second book
of the Cyborg Harpies trilogy,
595
00:48:38,147 --> 00:48:39,671
Tribonius seduces the Borg Queen
596
00:48:39,782 --> 00:48:42,615
by playing her an original piece
of music on his harpy-chord.
597
00:48:43,219 --> 00:48:45,312
Can you explain what that music
was supposed to sound like?
598
00:48:45,721 --> 00:48:49,987
Yes I believe you're referring
to a piece entitled Gorgana's Lullaby,
599
00:48:50,626 --> 00:48:55,928
the notes of which are too numerous
for the human ear to decipher
600
00:48:56,299 --> 00:48:59,496
I can, however,
reveal the lyrics to that tune,
601
00:48:59,602 --> 00:49:02,969
which until now have been unpublished
602
00:49:03,372 --> 00:49:04,339
That'd be awesome.
603
00:49:11,047 --> 00:49:14,539
'"Within my breast-meat, there is a famine
604
00:49:15,384 --> 00:49:19,218
'"No more sweets in the mammary cannon
605
00:49:19,922 --> 00:49:24,757
'"You are Gorgana, my eagle, my queen
606
00:49:25,127 --> 00:49:28,062
'"Your ovaries will destroy me
607
00:49:28,698 --> 00:49:30,529
'"Collect me in your wings
608
00:49:31,500 --> 00:49:35,903
'"I am just a man, and I want to breed
609
00:49:36,772 --> 00:49:40,333
'"Together we will learn to love
610
00:49:40,876 --> 00:49:45,973
'"You gorgeous hag, you freak machine'"
611
00:49:54,323 --> 00:49:55,950
Yes, the young man right over here
612
00:49:57,093 --> 00:50:00,119
I recently sold a story that I wrote
to some independent filmmakers,
613
00:50:00,229 --> 00:50:01,787
and I'm worried they're gonna ruin it.
614
00:50:02,231 --> 00:50:04,699
I know a lot of your books
have been made into TV movies,
615
00:50:04,800 --> 00:50:07,325
so I'm just wondering
how you've been able to let go
616
00:50:07,436 --> 00:50:10,200
and let somebody else completely
change the vision of your work.
617
00:50:11,607 --> 00:50:15,236
Great question
Thank you for firing it at me
618
00:50:17,513 --> 00:50:22,109
I remember early on in my career working
on the first Harpy mini-series
619
00:50:22,218 --> 00:50:26,587
I told the producers I wanted
everything to be absolutely real
620
00:50:26,889 --> 00:50:30,256
No special effects
I didn't believe in them and I still don't
621
00:50:30,593 --> 00:50:35,621
And I had a scientist friend
of mine from MITbuild
622
00:50:35,731 --> 00:50:40,395
a prototype of some mamocans,
which shot actual lasers
623
00:50:41,871 --> 00:50:45,432
I tried them on
during a lunch break in front of the crew,
624
00:50:45,541 --> 00:50:50,274
and one overheated
and began to malfunction,
625
00:50:50,513 --> 00:50:53,971
and actually exploded
and maimed a dolly grip
626
00:50:54,083 --> 00:50:55,675
It was very sad
627
00:50:56,419 --> 00:50:58,853
So how do I avoid situations like that?
628
00:50:59,088 --> 00:51:02,546
I mean, the idea of somebody
bastardizing my work really freaks me out.
629
00:51:02,658 --> 00:51:05,650
I see Have they paid you yet?
630
00:51:05,795 --> 00:51:07,285
Yeah. They gave me a check.
631
00:51:07,463 --> 00:51:10,899
Well, cash that check immediately
Enjoy your money
632
00:51:11,000 --> 00:51:13,901
I mean, isn't that why we do what we do,
dagnammit?
633
00:51:15,304 --> 00:51:17,670
For the money, for the riches of the earth
634
00:51:17,807 --> 00:51:19,741
When the future generations will look back,
635
00:51:19,842 --> 00:51:22,333
do you think they will remember us
for our writing?
636
00:51:22,478 --> 00:51:25,345
No, but for the wealth
we have accumulated
637
00:51:25,481 --> 00:51:27,415
Why do you think I wear this bracelet?
638
00:51:31,854 --> 00:51:35,187
And who knows?
Perhaps these producers may create
639
00:51:35,291 --> 00:51:38,419
something even better
than your original version
640
00:51:43,299 --> 00:51:45,494
Thank you, and thank you for coming.
Thank you.
641
00:51:46,569 --> 00:51:47,797
Thank you very much.
642
00:51:47,903 --> 00:51:49,700
You're welcome. Thank you.
643
00:51:50,172 --> 00:51:51,139
Hello.
644
00:51:51,707 --> 00:51:53,470
Hey. I don't know
if you remember me or anything.
645
00:51:53,576 --> 00:51:55,806
I was actually
in your workshop at Cletus Fest.
646
00:51:56,445 --> 00:51:59,471
Of course. Yes, you look vaguely familiar.
647
00:52:00,349 --> 00:52:02,510
I submitted this story called Yeast Lords
648
00:52:02,618 --> 00:52:03,676
I know it didn't win or anything,
649
00:52:03,786 --> 00:52:05,811
I was just wondering
maybe if you had read it,
650
00:52:05,955 --> 00:52:08,253
I thought maybe you can
give me your feedback.
651
00:52:09,992 --> 00:52:11,619
No, I don't think I read that one.
652
00:52:11,727 --> 00:52:13,820
It must have been one of the other judges.
653
00:52:15,231 --> 00:52:16,198
Okay.
654
00:52:17,600 --> 00:52:18,794
Goodbye.
655
00:52:43,280 --> 00:52:44,247
Mom.
656
00:52:47,018 --> 00:52:49,714
Mom, you need to calm down
and stop watching yourself cry.
657
00:53:01,766 --> 00:53:03,256
My gosh.
658
00:53:04,602 --> 00:53:09,335
I just... You know, I did the inventory
for the LeVonne's gowns this morning,
659
00:53:09,440 --> 00:53:12,409
and it... It appears that
there's one or two things missing.
660
00:53:12,510 --> 00:53:15,843
And that's $100 we don't have this month.
661
00:53:16,847 --> 00:53:19,111
I don't know how
I'm gonna give you a birthday.
662
00:53:19,717 --> 00:53:21,514
Don't worry about that, I'm fine.
663
00:53:22,586 --> 00:53:26,352
You know, in the meantime, I might have
you try to sell some of my Country Balls.
664
00:53:27,124 --> 00:53:30,958
You know, maybe we could have, like, a...
A two-for-one deal.
665
00:53:35,299 --> 00:53:37,358
Mom, I am not selling two in a sack.
666
00:53:38,035 --> 00:53:40,526
Come on, feel how heavy these are.
667
00:53:46,677 --> 00:53:48,440
Two-for-one Country Balls.
668
00:53:49,280 --> 00:53:51,145
Two-for-one Country Balls.
669
00:54:02,059 --> 00:54:04,084
Hi. I just need to cash this.
670
00:54:06,997 --> 00:54:09,090
This check is post-dated for next year.
671
00:54:09,233 --> 00:54:10,200
It is?
672
00:54:10,334 --> 00:54:12,393
Come back in a year from now,
and we'll see if it clears.
673
00:54:42,099 --> 00:54:43,066
Yeah!
674
00:54:56,881 --> 00:54:59,941
The world is closing in
675
00:55:00,050 --> 00:55:03,110
Did you ever think
676
00:55:03,220 --> 00:55:09,887
that we could be so close, like brothers?
677
00:55:11,095 --> 00:55:14,064
The future's in the air
678
00:55:14,165 --> 00:55:17,362
I can feel it everywhere
679
00:55:17,468 --> 00:55:23,464
Blowing with the wind of change
680
00:55:25,509 --> 00:55:31,209
Take me to the magic of the moment
681
00:55:31,315 --> 00:55:34,580
On a glory night
682
00:55:34,685 --> 00:55:40,146
Where the children of tomorrow
dream away
683
00:55:40,257 --> 00:55:43,522
In the wind of change
684
00:55:52,503 --> 00:55:55,233
Walking down the street
685
00:55:55,372 --> 00:55:58,432
Distant memories
686
00:55:58,542 --> 00:56:05,209
Are buried in the past forever
687
00:56:06,550 --> 00:56:09,576
I follow the Moskva
688
00:56:09,687 --> 00:56:12,850
Down to Gorky Park
689
00:56:12,957 --> 00:56:19,328
Listening to the wind of change
690
00:56:20,865 --> 00:56:26,531
Take me to the magic of the moment
691
00:56:26,637 --> 00:56:29,970
On a glory night
692
00:56:30,074 --> 00:56:35,569
Where the children of tomorrow
dream away
693
00:56:35,713 --> 00:56:39,945
In the wind of change
694
00:57:03,807 --> 00:57:06,367
Broadcasting live from Saltair Studios
695
00:57:06,477 --> 00:57:08,274
here in the Great Basin valley,
696
00:57:08,646 --> 00:57:11,444
we bring you The Rod Decker Show,
697
00:57:11,548 --> 00:57:14,016
serving your community for over a decade
698
00:57:14,285 --> 00:57:16,412
Your host, Rod Decker
699
00:57:18,289 --> 00:57:20,553
Good morning
Welcome to The Rod Decker Show.
700
00:57:20,824 --> 00:57:23,349
We have some filmmakers here today
701
00:57:23,727 --> 00:57:27,060
Mr Lonnie Donaho is
the director ofYeast Lords.
702
00:57:27,331 --> 00:57:30,494
Miss Tabatha Jenkins is the producer.
703
00:57:30,701 --> 00:57:34,637
And seated next to me is
Mr. Dusty Crissop. He's the leading man.
704
00:57:34,738 --> 00:57:37,172
Look. It's Dusty.
705
00:57:37,408 --> 00:57:41,742
These guys are prolific.
This is your 84th production, Mr. Donaho?
706
00:57:41,946 --> 00:57:42,913
And what's it about?
707
00:57:43,314 --> 00:57:47,045
Basically, it's a story
about two Ionely souls
708
00:57:47,318 --> 00:57:51,254
that find love during
a time of war and disease.
709
00:57:51,789 --> 00:57:53,188
War and disease
710
00:57:53,457 --> 00:57:56,517
Okay, that sounds
That sounds interesting Yeast Lords.
711
00:57:56,827 --> 00:57:58,761
Your idea? Did you come up with it?
712
00:57:58,862 --> 00:58:03,094
No way. She bought
the story from a boy named Benjy Purvis.
713
00:58:03,701 --> 00:58:05,498
This is so neat.
714
00:58:06,170 --> 00:58:09,697
But to be honest,
his story had some major issues.
715
00:58:10,007 --> 00:58:14,808
Bridgette? Some kind
of troupe of pre-teen amateur circus freaks
716
00:58:14,912 --> 00:58:16,880
have made an adaptation
of Brutus and Balzaak
717
00:58:17,014 --> 00:58:18,276
without my permission.
718
00:58:18,582 --> 00:58:22,416
I'm completely distressed. I can't even
concentrate on my audio book narration.
719
00:58:23,220 --> 00:58:26,519
Dusty Crissop, the leading man,
a movie star.
720
00:58:26,623 --> 00:58:28,750
What was it like working with Mr. Donaho?
721
00:58:28,926 --> 00:58:34,023
Lonnie is the best director
I've ever worked with, by far.
722
00:58:35,933 --> 00:58:40,632
I don't know of another director
who can call "action" one minute,
723
00:58:40,771 --> 00:58:44,400
and the next he puts on
a bald head and he's acting.
724
00:58:45,342 --> 00:58:47,708
Yes, I don't know what we can do.
Can we sue them?
725
00:58:48,746 --> 00:58:50,373
Can we crush them in the press?
726
00:58:50,914 --> 00:58:53,678
It's like working
with an extension of myself
727
00:58:53,784 --> 00:58:56,947
I know, but if there's
one thing I can't stand, it's plagiarism.
728
00:58:57,621 --> 00:58:58,588
We're out of time.
729
00:58:59,056 --> 00:59:01,183
If you want to see Yeast Lords,
730
00:59:01,291 --> 00:59:04,192
premiere is tonight at the Saltair Cinema.
731
00:59:04,762 --> 00:59:06,753
And to my guests, break a leg.
732
00:59:06,864 --> 00:59:08,889
I think that's
what they say in show business.
733
00:59:09,266 --> 00:59:10,995
Thanks for being here. Good luck to you.
734
00:59:11,101 --> 00:59:13,160
- Thanks, Rod.
- Thank you.
735
00:59:16,840 --> 00:59:19,673
Oh, my gosh. Benjamin.
736
00:59:20,477 --> 00:59:22,570
What are you and I gonna
wear to the premiere?
737
00:59:23,881 --> 00:59:26,406
You got to promise me
you're gonna let me make you something.
738
00:59:36,927 --> 00:59:38,019
Mr. Donaho?
739
00:59:39,696 --> 00:59:42,164
Hi, I'm with the Village Gazette
Nice to meet you.
740
00:59:42,266 --> 00:59:43,233
Hi.
741
00:59:53,644 --> 00:59:56,909
Hey, Benjamin. I'm so glad you came.
How are you?
742
00:59:57,014 --> 00:59:58,072
I'm good.
743
00:59:58,182 --> 01:00:00,207
Nice to see you, Benjy-boy.
744
01:00:00,384 --> 01:00:03,376
Hey, Lonnie. This is my mom, Judith.
745
01:00:03,620 --> 01:00:06,646
Hi. I like your matching hippie clothes.
746
01:00:06,990 --> 01:00:08,423
Oh, thank you.
747
01:00:11,128 --> 01:00:13,528
There are important press people here,
748
01:00:13,730 --> 01:00:16,790
so don't forget to do
a nice standing ovation.
749
01:00:17,101 --> 01:00:18,193
You got it.
750
01:00:19,369 --> 01:00:20,961
Shall we take our seats?
751
01:00:36,653 --> 01:00:38,644
Daisy had everything
752
01:00:39,790 --> 01:00:40,757
Beauty
753
01:00:41,825 --> 01:00:42,792
Money
754
01:00:44,361 --> 01:00:46,921
A 50-acre horse ranch
755
01:00:49,833 --> 01:00:51,801
A prize-winning stallion
756
01:00:53,403 --> 01:00:54,995
But what she didn't have was
757
01:00:55,372 --> 01:00:58,205
Logan, the stable boy
758
01:01:03,447 --> 01:01:06,678
But he was already married to her sister
759
01:01:16,393 --> 01:01:18,987
Hey, Logan, want to go for a ride?
760
01:01:19,930 --> 01:01:21,625
Can we bring old big sis along?
761
01:01:21,965 --> 01:01:24,229
I was thinking it could be just the two of us
762
01:01:27,104 --> 01:01:29,664
Come on in The water's great
763
01:01:30,941 --> 01:01:32,408
I don't think that's a good idea
764
01:01:54,765 --> 01:01:58,895
I don't care if you have
a 50-acre ranch or a prize-winning stallion
765
01:01:59,069 --> 01:02:02,163
I love my wife
We have a great physical relationship
766
01:02:04,374 --> 01:02:07,400
My horse's semen
is worth $10 million
767
01:02:08,412 --> 01:02:11,347
Investors from all over the world have tried
everything they can
768
01:02:11,448 --> 01:02:12,847
to get their hands on it
769
01:02:24,228 --> 01:02:25,195
Benjamin.
770
01:02:35,172 --> 01:02:37,868
I've only just realized
that what we shared together onscreen
771
01:02:37,975 --> 01:02:40,239
was very real to me.
772
01:02:41,745 --> 01:02:42,712
I don't feel very good.
773
01:02:43,013 --> 01:02:45,675
Oh, well, you're nervous about the film,
aren't you?
774
01:02:46,350 --> 01:02:47,339
Yeah.
775
01:02:47,451 --> 01:02:48,475
Well, let's get out of here, then.
776
01:02:48,585 --> 01:02:52,077
Let's go someplace
where we can relax and be alone.
777
01:02:55,892 --> 01:02:56,859
Okay.
778
01:02:57,694 --> 01:02:58,956
Can you hold on for just a second?
779
01:02:59,062 --> 01:03:00,029
Oh, yeah.
780
01:03:25,922 --> 01:03:28,618
Come with me to my underground facilities
781
01:03:37,167 --> 01:03:40,694
Working at the yeast facility
has made my breasts so big
782
01:03:41,104 --> 01:03:43,368
and gave me so many diseases
783
01:03:44,174 --> 01:03:46,608
I wish I could've been there for ye
784
01:03:49,146 --> 01:03:53,276
Your brother loves you, Vanaya,
and he'd do anything for ye
785
01:03:54,117 --> 01:03:56,847
But Daysius has surely
destroyed him by now
786
01:04:11,935 --> 01:04:14,961
One of the laser hit my boobs
787
01:04:15,806 --> 01:04:17,205
Okay, we can go.
788
01:04:35,926 --> 01:04:39,555
I thought we could grab a couple of
sudokus and snuggle up somewhere.
789
01:05:16,500 --> 01:05:19,196
Groggily,
Brutus regained consciousness
790
01:05:19,369 --> 01:05:21,200
There was a numb pain below,
791
01:05:21,338 --> 01:05:24,603
some stitches obviously
sewn by a medical droid
792
01:05:24,875 --> 01:05:29,938
Instantly, Brutus knew that one
of his reproductive bags had been stolen
793
01:05:35,285 --> 01:05:37,947
Oh, my gosh, is that
the new Chevalier book?
794
01:05:38,722 --> 01:05:39,689
Read this.
795
01:05:40,323 --> 01:05:41,813
Benjy, don't ruin it for me.
796
01:05:41,925 --> 01:05:42,892
Just read it.
797
01:05:43,860 --> 01:05:44,827
Okay.
798
01:05:48,965 --> 01:05:51,627
"As Brutus struggled to free
himself from the medical pod,
799
01:05:51,735 --> 01:05:53,896
"a voice spoke to him
from across the room.
800
01:05:54,237 --> 01:05:57,400
"'I'm sorry, Brutus,
we had to borrow one of your gonads.
801
01:05:58,775 --> 01:06:02,768
"'We're investigating ways
to strengthen the military."'
802
01:06:06,183 --> 01:06:08,777
I don't believe this.
803
01:06:18,829 --> 01:06:21,855
Benjamin, wait, we can get through this.
804
01:06:22,165 --> 01:06:25,464
Strutting into town
like you're slinging a gun
805
01:06:25,569 --> 01:06:30,268
Just a small-town dude
with a big-city attitude
806
01:06:30,373 --> 01:06:34,241
Honey, are you looking
for some trouble tonight?
807
01:06:34,344 --> 01:06:36,369
Well, all right
808
01:06:36,480 --> 01:06:40,007
You think you're so bad,
drive the women folk wild
809
01:06:40,116 --> 01:06:44,519
Shoot them all down
with the flash of your pearly smile
810
01:06:44,621 --> 01:06:48,250
Honey, but you met your match tonight
811
01:06:48,358 --> 01:06:50,155
Oh, that's right
812
01:06:50,260 --> 01:06:52,160
You think you'll knock me off my feet
813
01:06:52,262 --> 01:06:53,854
Till I'm flat on the floor
814
01:06:53,964 --> 01:06:57,627
Till my heart is crying Indian
and I'm begging for more
815
01:06:57,734 --> 01:07:01,431
So come on, baby
Come on, baby
816
01:07:01,538 --> 01:07:03,938
Come on, baby,
show me what that loaded gun is for
817
01:07:04,040 --> 01:07:05,029
Dusty?
818
01:07:08,011 --> 01:07:09,410
What are you doing here?
819
01:07:10,380 --> 01:07:12,041
I brought your wrap gift.
820
01:07:15,151 --> 01:07:16,118
Oh.
821
01:07:25,061 --> 01:07:26,619
People hated your movie.
822
01:07:27,564 --> 01:07:28,588
Some of them walked out.
823
01:07:29,199 --> 01:07:30,689
Yeah, I kind of figured that.
824
01:07:31,701 --> 01:07:34,670
And this guy said
you stole the whole deal from some book.
825
01:07:34,771 --> 01:07:35,738
It's not true.
826
01:07:36,406 --> 01:07:39,102
Yeah. I hit that guy in the face.
827
01:07:40,277 --> 01:07:41,767
Then I punched Lonnie in the neck.
828
01:07:42,946 --> 01:07:44,504
Lonnie's a butthole.
829
01:07:45,448 --> 01:07:48,076
Did you hear what he did to my voice?
I sound like a leprechaun.
830
01:07:49,319 --> 01:07:51,219
That's why if somebody messes
with one of your stories again,
831
01:07:51,321 --> 01:07:52,618
you gotta take them out.
832
01:07:53,423 --> 01:07:54,390
'Cause you're good.
833
01:07:55,792 --> 01:07:58,317
And I'm not saying that
just 'cause I'm your Guardian Angel.
834
01:08:00,797 --> 01:08:01,764
Thanks.
835
01:08:05,068 --> 01:08:07,502
Just like Jesse James
836
01:08:07,604 --> 01:08:11,631
Tonight you're gonna go down in flames
837
01:08:11,741 --> 01:08:14,107
Just like Jesse James
838
01:08:14,210 --> 01:08:18,374
Tonight you're gonna go down in flames
839
01:08:18,481 --> 01:08:24,511
Just like Jesse James
840
01:08:24,621 --> 01:08:29,251
I'm gonna shoot you down, Jesse James
841
01:08:31,194 --> 01:08:32,161
Look.
842
01:08:34,864 --> 01:08:36,297
Who's that?
843
01:08:37,634 --> 01:08:40,330
Isn't that your hero? He's in town.
844
01:08:40,804 --> 01:08:44,262
Maybe after Don Carlos,
we could drop by the book signing.
845
01:08:44,674 --> 01:08:47,768
You know, Don Carlos owns the biggest
nightgown company in the state,
846
01:08:47,911 --> 01:08:50,345
and he wants to see my entire line.
847
01:08:50,447 --> 01:08:52,347
I mean, this could be my big ticket.
848
01:08:53,016 --> 01:08:55,211
I feel like things are changing for us,
don't you?
849
01:08:55,885 --> 01:09:00,288
And it's gotta be Dusty.
He's our good luck charm.
850
01:09:00,457 --> 01:09:03,654
Come on. Come on, honey, I need your help.
851
01:09:04,160 --> 01:09:05,855
We gotta do a few loads.
852
01:09:06,963 --> 01:09:07,987
Ow.
853
01:09:08,531 --> 01:09:09,498
Get her.
854
01:09:15,472 --> 01:09:17,269
Guess this is it.
855
01:09:18,508 --> 01:09:19,998
I'm so nervous.
856
01:09:20,910 --> 01:09:23,606
I just pray that he likes my collection.
857
01:09:25,982 --> 01:09:26,949
How do I look?
858
01:09:27,651 --> 01:09:28,777
You look fine.
859
01:09:29,653 --> 01:09:30,984
Wish me luck.
860
01:10:11,061 --> 01:10:13,188
Your house is a real palace.
861
01:10:15,331 --> 01:10:16,855
Hey. I didn't see you there.
862
01:10:18,301 --> 01:10:19,791
Love your dress.
863
01:10:20,737 --> 01:10:21,704
Thank you.
864
01:10:22,439 --> 01:10:24,999
Why don't you go into my bedroom
and undress to your comfort level,
865
01:10:25,108 --> 01:10:26,871
and I'll be there in a second.
866
01:10:42,992 --> 01:10:45,756
Brutus stood
at the edge of the pond
867
01:10:45,862 --> 01:10:48,592
and held aloft a futuristic cylinder
868
01:10:49,065 --> 01:10:51,192
I made us a time capsule.
869
01:10:51,768 --> 01:10:54,293
I put a butt-Ioad of keepsakes in it.
870
01:10:54,404 --> 01:10:56,634
We can send it floating downstream,
871
01:10:56,840 --> 01:11:00,936
and that way, if we die,
future generations will learn from us.
872
01:11:01,978 --> 01:11:03,377
Look at this.
873
01:11:03,847 --> 01:11:05,542
It's a friendship stone.
874
01:11:07,484 --> 01:11:08,678
Come closer.
875
01:11:10,787 --> 01:11:11,879
Let's blow on it.
876
01:11:13,022 --> 01:11:14,489
You blow first.
877
01:11:33,009 --> 01:11:33,976
What?
878
01:11:54,531 --> 01:11:57,432
Mom. What happened?
879
01:12:02,138 --> 01:12:04,698
He wanted me to bed down with him.
880
01:12:04,808 --> 01:12:05,775
He what?
881
01:12:05,875 --> 01:12:07,866
He said if I slept with him,
882
01:12:08,845 --> 01:12:12,975
that I could have my nightgowns
in every Penney's across America.
883
01:12:18,087 --> 01:12:20,021
But I couldn't do it.
884
01:12:22,392 --> 01:12:25,691
Benjamin, no! Benjamin, no!
885
01:12:26,095 --> 01:12:30,395
Hey, Don Carlos! How about you come
down here and fight me like a man!
886
01:12:30,633 --> 01:12:32,760
Benjamin, stop, get back in the car.
887
01:12:33,703 --> 01:12:35,933
Benjamin, get back in the car!
888
01:12:40,610 --> 01:12:43,841
You think you can harass
my mom, you fat sack of crap?
889
01:12:44,247 --> 01:12:46,044
Come down here and fight me!
890
01:12:54,157 --> 01:12:56,853
Mom, I need you to pop open the trunk
and run away from the car.
891
01:12:56,960 --> 01:12:58,120
I can't.
892
01:12:58,228 --> 01:13:00,458
Just pop open the trunk
and get out of here.
893
01:13:00,864 --> 01:13:02,263
No, but I can't.
894
01:13:51,381 --> 01:13:57,013
Finished with my woman
'cause she couldn't help me with my mind
895
01:13:57,120 --> 01:14:03,116
People think I'm insane
because I am frowning all the time
896
01:14:14,771 --> 01:14:17,103
All day long I think of things
897
01:14:17,206 --> 01:14:18,764
But nothing seems to satisfy
898
01:14:22,612 --> 01:14:24,443
- Hello.
- Hi.
899
01:14:24,547 --> 01:14:26,071
And who can I make this out to?
900
01:14:26,182 --> 01:14:27,171
Kristie.
901
01:14:27,817 --> 01:14:28,784
Kristie.
902
01:14:34,490 --> 01:14:38,688
I would just love to step inside your brain
for a day and see what it's like.
903
01:14:39,495 --> 01:14:42,828
Explore its many kingdoms
and learn its darkest secrets.
904
01:14:43,166 --> 01:14:47,603
Take it from someone who lives there,
you might not be able to handle it.
905
01:14:48,905 --> 01:14:52,272
My mind is a landscape
of mystery, of thrills.
906
01:14:52,542 --> 01:14:55,033
A place where even the bravest of travelers
907
01:14:55,178 --> 01:14:57,840
would be shaken
by its geysers of original thought.
908
01:14:58,548 --> 01:14:59,606
Wow!
909
01:15:00,083 --> 01:15:01,141
Hmm.
910
01:15:01,651 --> 01:15:04,814
I know. May the gods bless you.
911
01:15:05,955 --> 01:15:11,757
And so as you hear
these words telling you now of my state
912
01:15:11,861 --> 01:15:17,731
I tell you to enjoy life
I wish I could but it's too late
913
01:15:21,771 --> 01:15:23,363
- Hi.
- Hi.
914
01:15:26,175 --> 01:15:28,370
I was wondering
if you would sign this for me.
915
01:15:44,193 --> 01:15:46,058
Excuse me for a moment.
916
01:15:52,702 --> 01:15:55,500
Friends Friends
917
01:15:56,205 --> 01:16:00,335
I would like to introduce you
to a dear disciple of mine
918
01:16:00,910 --> 01:16:03,640
This young man standing beside me
919
01:16:04,881 --> 01:16:06,940
loved Brutus and Balzaak so much
920
01:16:07,817 --> 01:16:14,381
that he turned it into a gripping screen
adaptation called Yeastie Boys.
921
01:16:15,591 --> 01:16:17,786
As a reward for his efforts,
922
01:16:18,194 --> 01:16:22,426
Prism Publishing has decided to honor him
923
01:16:22,665 --> 01:16:26,157
with an all-expenses-paid trip
924
01:16:26,269 --> 01:16:29,500
to any one of the lower 48 states,
925
01:16:30,706 --> 01:16:37,270
And this commemorative bean-pillow,
926
01:16:37,747 --> 01:16:38,714
mini-size,
927
01:16:44,387 --> 01:16:45,820
this jacket,
928
01:16:48,458 --> 01:16:50,483
and a trip to Space Camp
929
01:16:52,028 --> 01:16:52,995
Awesome.
930
01:16:54,163 --> 01:16:56,461
Join me now in a moment of silence
931
01:16:56,566 --> 01:17:01,868
as we commemorate his contribution
to science and the arts
932
01:17:19,322 --> 01:17:21,449
Put the pillow down, I beg of you.
933
01:17:21,557 --> 01:17:22,819
You stole my story.
934
01:17:23,059 --> 01:17:24,492
I don't know what you're talking about.
935
01:17:24,727 --> 01:17:27,787
All you did was change the character
names and turn Bronco into a tranny.
936
01:17:27,897 --> 01:17:30,457
Shut up.
I don't know what he's talking about.
937
01:17:30,566 --> 01:17:32,431
Please, someone seize him.
938
01:17:34,036 --> 01:17:35,003
Seize him.
939
01:17:35,404 --> 01:17:38,805
You're a fraud, and all your fans
should know you're a fraud.
940
01:17:39,876 --> 01:17:40,843
Take him away.
941
01:17:42,712 --> 01:17:43,679
Get lost.
942
01:17:44,080 --> 01:17:47,538
But, please, show leniency.
Always leniency.
943
01:17:48,518 --> 01:17:49,883
Open the gate.
944
01:17:54,157 --> 01:17:55,385
Benjamin?
945
01:17:56,626 --> 01:17:57,854
Benjamin?
946
01:17:59,595 --> 01:18:00,562
Benjamin?
947
01:18:03,132 --> 01:18:06,226
Oh, Benjamin. There you are.
948
01:18:07,136 --> 01:18:08,501
Oh, honey.
949
01:18:09,872 --> 01:18:12,170
This is a terrible place.
950
01:18:12,875 --> 01:18:15,969
Are you all right?
You're not wounded, are you?
951
01:18:16,145 --> 01:18:17,112
I'm fine.
952
01:18:17,513 --> 01:18:20,448
I don't know how this all happened. I just...
953
01:18:20,716 --> 01:18:23,651
You're gonna have to spend
your birthday in jail.
954
01:18:25,454 --> 01:18:27,854
Oh, honey, don't cry. I know I...
955
01:18:28,591 --> 01:18:30,320
I brought you some presents.
956
01:18:38,434 --> 01:18:41,767
Happy birthday. A popcorn car.
957
01:18:51,180 --> 01:18:53,114
Well, I can give it to you later.
958
01:19:06,028 --> 01:19:07,620
I've been registering all your stories
959
01:19:07,730 --> 01:19:10,096
with the Writers' League
since you were seven.
960
01:19:19,208 --> 01:19:24,271
In the year 2525
961
01:19:24,380 --> 01:19:26,905
I thought someday
you could show it to your kids.
962
01:19:27,016 --> 01:19:31,009
If man is still alive
963
01:19:31,120 --> 01:19:34,715
If woman can survive
964
01:19:34,824 --> 01:19:40,820
They may find
965
01:19:45,501 --> 01:19:48,061
"'Aroo? ' questioned Balzaak.
966
01:19:48,938 --> 01:19:53,136
"'Don't give me that, you crazy wolf,'
erupted Brutus.
967
01:19:53,542 --> 01:19:57,603
"'You know why I put that in there.
Perhaps they can clone me.
968
01:19:58,214 --> 01:20:00,910
"'And besides,
it's always good to have a spare."'
969
01:20:02,451 --> 01:20:04,851
In the year 4545
970
01:20:04,954 --> 01:20:09,015
Ain't gonna need your teeth,
won't need your eyes
971
01:20:09,125 --> 01:20:10,092
Chevalier.
972
01:20:10,192 --> 01:20:12,820
You won't find a thing to chew
973
01:20:12,928 --> 01:20:16,386
Nobody's gonna look at you
974
01:20:16,499 --> 01:20:20,526
In the year 5555
975
01:20:20,636 --> 01:20:24,504
Your arms are hanging
limp at your sides
976
01:20:24,607 --> 01:20:28,008
Your legs got nothing to do
977
01:20:28,110 --> 01:20:31,671
Some machine's doing that for you
978
01:20:32,214 --> 01:20:35,945
In the year 6565
979
01:20:36,052 --> 01:20:39,510
Ain't gonna need no husband,
won't need no wife
980
01:20:39,622 --> 01:20:42,716
You'll pick your son,
pick your daughter, too
981
01:20:43,893 --> 01:20:48,091
From the bottom
of a long glass tube, whoa-oh
982
01:20:48,197 --> 01:20:52,099
In the year 6565
983
01:20:52,201 --> 01:20:55,693
Ain't gonna need no husband,
won't need no wife
984
01:20:55,805 --> 01:20:59,764
You'll pick your son,
pick your daughter, too
985
01:20:59,875 --> 01:21:02,435
From the bottom
of a long glass tube, whoa-oh
986
01:21:02,545 --> 01:21:04,137
Land your stag!
987
01:21:46,622 --> 01:21:48,613
Come on, Daysius.
988
01:22:09,912 --> 01:22:12,608
For what he never knew
989
01:22:12,715 --> 01:22:15,479
Now man's reign is through
990
01:22:15,584 --> 01:22:18,075
But through the eternal night
991
01:22:18,187 --> 01:22:20,951
The twinkling of starlight
992
01:22:21,056 --> 01:22:23,684
So very far away
993
01:22:23,793 --> 01:22:26,921
Maybe it's only yesterday
994
01:22:28,230 --> 01:22:32,360
In the year 2525
995
01:22:32,468 --> 01:22:35,130
If man is still alive
996
01:22:46,615 --> 01:22:47,582
Yeah.
997
01:22:52,688 --> 01:22:54,121
Oh, my gosh.
998
01:22:55,791 --> 01:22:57,691
Benjamin, you are so talented.
999
01:22:58,961 --> 01:23:00,428
This is amazing.
1000
01:23:01,697 --> 01:23:03,028
So are you, Mom.
1001
01:23:04,700 --> 01:23:06,167
What's this?
1002
01:23:13,075 --> 01:23:14,042
I love you.
1003
01:24:44,633 --> 01:24:47,431
Carry on my wayward son
1004
01:24:47,536 --> 01:24:51,597
There'll be peace when you are done
1005
01:24:51,707 --> 01:24:55,575
Lay your weary head to rest
1006
01:24:55,678 --> 01:24:58,772
Don't you cry no more
1007
01:25:51,400 --> 01:25:55,234
Once I rose above
the noise and confusion
1008
01:25:55,337 --> 01:25:59,296
Just to get a glimpse
beyond this illusion
1009
01:25:59,408 --> 01:26:03,310
I was soaring ever higher
1010
01:26:03,412 --> 01:26:06,472
But I flew too high
1011
01:26:07,216 --> 01:26:11,084
Though my eyes could see
I still was a blind man
1012
01:26:11,186 --> 01:26:14,451
Though my mind could think
I still was a madman
1013
01:26:14,556 --> 01:26:18,583
I hear the voices when I'm dreaming
1014
01:26:18,694 --> 01:26:22,221
I can hear them say
1015
01:26:22,331 --> 01:26:26,097
Carry on my wayward son
1016
01:26:26,201 --> 01:26:29,830
There'll be peace when you are done
1017
01:26:29,938 --> 01:26:33,635
Lay your weary head to rest
1018
01:26:33,742 --> 01:26:36,540
Don't you cry no more
1019
01:26:47,122 --> 01:26:50,649
Masquerading as a man with a reason
1020
01:26:50,759 --> 01:26:54,286
My charade is the event of the season
1021
01:26:54,396 --> 01:26:57,957
And if I claim to be a wise man
1022
01:26:58,067 --> 01:27:02,003
It surely means that I don't know
1023
01:27:02,104 --> 01:27:05,870
On a stormy sea of moving emotion
1024
01:27:05,974 --> 01:27:09,410
Tossed about,
I'm like a ship on the ocean
1025
01:27:09,511 --> 01:27:13,311
I set a course for winds of fortune
1026
01:27:13,415 --> 01:27:16,077
But I hear the voices say
1027
01:27:17,152 --> 01:27:20,781
Carry on my wayward son
1028
01:27:20,889 --> 01:27:24,484
There'll be peace when you are done
1029
01:27:24,593 --> 01:27:28,188
Lay your weary head to rest
1030
01:27:28,297 --> 01:27:30,663
- Don't you cry no more
- No!
1031
01:28:58,120 --> 01:29:00,111
(MOANING) Oh, yeah.
1032
01:29:07,963 --> 01:29:08,930
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