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1
00:00:00,600 --> 00:00:05,639
TV: And punch it out
and do it again.
2
00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:08,279
SHE GROANS
3
00:00:08,280 --> 00:00:11,240
PHONE RINGS
TV: ..and do it again.
4
00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:14,199
Hiya! How you getting on?
5
00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:18,239
I'm good.
I'm just doing my video. Which one?
Judith Chalmers boxercise.
6
00:00:18,240 --> 00:00:20,239
Right. Any news on that job?
7
00:00:20,240 --> 00:00:25,359
No, I've still not heard nothing.
I rang about two this morning but
they've already gone. Oh, babe.
8
00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:29,519
But there's something going at the
zoo. The zoo? Yeah! Can you imagine?
9
00:00:29,520 --> 00:00:31,839
That'd be immense.
What we doing tonight?
10
00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:34,639
Shall we go the pictures?
Nah, Dad's doing his lamb.
11
00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:39,760
Oh, lush. So, we'll just
have a quiet night in, eh?
Yeah. That'll be nice.
12
00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:46,239
Mick's gonna be on the telly, Stacey!
13
00:00:46,240 --> 00:00:51,959
Mick's gonna be on the telly! What?
Mick! He just phoned. He's gonna
be on the telly, can you believe it?
14
00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:54,719
Are you serious?
Yeah, he's gonna be on tonight!
15
00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:58,599
I've gotta ring Dawn.
I gotta ring Gav!
16
00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:03,320
I know! He's gonna be on the telly!
He just rang me. Hang on.
17
00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:08,239
Smithy? Is your old man
gonna be on the telly?
18
00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:13,639
Yeah, I just got a text from
Gary and Simon. Unbelievable!
Six o'clock, yeah? I'll be there!
19
00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:15,439
Well, I never.
20
00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:17,759
OK! Six o'clock.
21
00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:19,839
Yes, we'll be watching.
22
00:01:19,840 --> 00:01:21,799
Mick is going to be on the telly.
23
00:01:21,800 --> 00:01:24,639
No, I was just telling Nessa.
24
00:01:24,640 --> 00:01:26,879
OK, bye.
25
00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:28,719
You are never gonna believe this!
26
00:01:28,720 --> 00:01:32,399
Mick's gonna be on the telly. Yes!
27
00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:35,839
Oh, my God! I brought some bubbly.
Can you believe it?
28
00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:37,639
I know! Come in, come in!
29
00:01:37,640 --> 00:01:39,879
God, It's all over the radio.
30
00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:41,679
You are joking me!
31
00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:46,199
No! And they said he was 53.
I said to Pete, "They got
that bit wrong for starters!"
32
00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:48,199
Where is Pete? Is he coming over?
33
00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:51,199
Oh, don't talk to me about
that dwarf. Hiya, Stace.
34
00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:52,879
Hiya! Fancy a drop of this?
35
00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:55,919
Ooh, go on then. I just
heard Dad's name on the radio.
36
00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:58,279
I know, Dawn said.
He's the talk of the town!
37
00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:03,039
Hiya! It's so exciting, isn't it?
I know, it's nuts.
Everyone's watching in Barry!
38
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:04,599
Well, this is peachy.
39
00:02:04,600 --> 00:02:06,359
This is the best day of my life.
40
00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:08,119
Mick on the telly.
41
00:02:08,120 --> 00:02:12,640
There you are, love. Just cheese.
Are you sure that's all right?
Crystal.
42
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,479
I wonder how he's feeling now?
43
00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:20,239
Well, it'll be a mixture of nerves
and excitement I should imagine.
44
00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:22,159
I remember when I was on TV.
45
00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:27,439
I mean, it was different - it wasn't
actually me, it was a photo-fit,
but the likeness was uncanny.
46
00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:29,239
I found it terrifying.
47
00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:30,879
They got you spot on.
48
00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:33,720
It was so good
I had to shave my head.
49
00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:45,679
Here he is! And look at all the
paparazzi. Come on, superstar!
50
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:49,079
Give it a rest, will you?
Stand back, stand back!
51
00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:51,879
Security's here!
Come on, there's nothing to see!
52
00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:54,719
Not you as well.
I wish I'd never mentioned it. Dawn!
53
00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:57,719
Pete's pretending to be Mick's
security guard! Tell him to grow up.
54
00:02:57,720 --> 00:03:02,680
They said you was 53 on the radio,
I said to Dawn,
"They got that wrong for starters!"
55
00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:05,839
Hey!
56
00:03:05,840 --> 00:03:08,679
Was that him? The movie star?
57
00:03:08,680 --> 00:03:13,319
Yeah, but he's just a regular guy,
Betty. He's just like the rest of us.
58
00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:15,359
Well, we're taping it, aren't we?
59
00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:17,559
Ah, that's the spirit.
60
00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:21,359
When I say taping, I mean we got one
of them boxes, you know, all remote.
61
00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:24,479
Oh, yeah! We've got one of them,
they're incredible.
62
00:03:24,480 --> 00:03:26,959
And you can pause it
you know and everything.
63
00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:29,919
If you want to make a cup of tea.
That's right...
64
00:03:29,920 --> 00:03:32,199
How's the house hunting coming along,
Gav?
65
00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:37,719
We haven't really started yet. We're
looking at our first place tomorrow.
I can't wait. I am so excited.
66
00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:40,159
I remember my first place.
67
00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:44,279
It wasn't much, nothing special,
but it was mine.
68
00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:50,679
No-one else telling me what
I could and couldn't do,
grinding me down 24/7.
69
00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:52,760
Happy days.
70
00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:01,519
How's the lamb, Pam?
Yeah, all in. There you go.
71
00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:06,479
Wait till you taste my marinade.
- I'll be having a lentil bake.
- This is good stuff.
72
00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:12,079
- Yeah. Courtesy of your lady wife,
thank you very much.
- What?
73
00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:16,479
You bought this? Yes.
So there's no money for me to play
golf on Sunday,
74
00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:18,719
but there's money for champagne?
75
00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:21,479
Don't embarrass me, Pete.
You're unbelievable.
76
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:24,800
You're unbelievable,
you vicious little pig.
77
00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:26,439
It's on! Come on!
78
00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:28,599
Oh, my God. I can't believe it.
79
00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:31,959
TV: The Six O'Clock News on BBC One
with George Alagiah.
80
00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:35,039
Good evening and welcome to
the Six O'Clock News.
81
00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:39,279
It's starting, Gwen.
I'll be there now!
82
00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:42,519
The Health Department announces
more cuts on the way.
83
00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:45,559
A murderer strikes again in Essex.
84
00:04:45,560 --> 00:04:48,439
A dismembered body is found
in a Billericay car park.
85
00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:50,800
CHEERING
86
00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:55,559
Cracking. Do you know what show
I'd like to be on?
87
00:04:55,560 --> 00:04:57,679
Stars In Their Eyes.
88
00:04:57,680 --> 00:05:00,959
Who'd you be?
Well, it changes on a daily basis.
89
00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:03,439
If I had to go right here, right now,
90
00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:06,879
David Bowie.
Gwen? Stars In Their Eyes.
91
00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:08,279
Who'd you be?
92
00:05:08,280 --> 00:05:10,919
Suzie Quatro. Ness?
93
00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:12,959
Prince.
94
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:15,199
Every time.
95
00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:19,359
Yes, I know!
Yes, the dismembered body.
96
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:23,279
That's Mick! Yeah, it's the
third item on the programme.
97
00:05:23,280 --> 00:05:25,999
Yeah, all right then, bye.
98
00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:28,199
Where you going?
It'll be on any second.
99
00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:31,039
I know, I won't be long.
So was it chopped up?
100
00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:36,520
Yeah, and it was charred,
like it had been burnt. Ooo!
101
00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:41,839
You all right? Yeah, I'm
just having some chocolate.
102
00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:47,079
We're eating in a bit. What's up?
I dunno really.
I've gone down, if I'm honest.
103
00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:49,439
Ah, come here. Why you feeling down?
104
00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:53,559
I'm just a bit bored, you know?
A bit useless.
105
00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:58,479
And me dad being on the telly and
that, just reminds me that I've
never done anything like that.
106
00:05:58,480 --> 00:06:01,639
He found a dead body, babe.
It's not an achievement. I know.
107
00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:04,559
But I just feel like I'm
getting under everyone's feet.
108
00:06:04,560 --> 00:06:06,799
You're all on at me
to get a job, and...
109
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:10,879
If I'm honest,
I'm just a bit homesick.
110
00:06:10,880 --> 00:06:14,959
Oh, come on. We can't have this
all the time. I knew you'd say that.
111
00:06:14,960 --> 00:06:19,879
Nessa's coming up tomorrow. We're
looking at houses. Flats. You've
gotta be more positive.
112
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:23,919
There's no point talking about it.
You don't understand.
Have I missed it?
113
00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:26,559
No, it's next item up.
Quality. Where is he?
114
00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:29,999
Michael! Mick-lar! Pamel-ar!
115
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,599
Smithster!
116
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:35,479
Dawn-lar! What a treat, take it high!
Peter-loni on the back wing. Smithy!
117
00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:39,519
Dream. That's all over the box!
Been on the radio an' all, ain't ya?
118
00:06:39,520 --> 00:06:43,439
Rudi texted me, they said
you was 53, Billy Bullshitter!
119
00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:48,439
So how's everything with the baby?
Er, yeah good, I think.
We went down for the, um...
120
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:50,599
Scan. Yeah, and all good.
121
00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:55,239
We got the, er... Photograph.
I've got it somewhere.
Where is it? It's in my... Wallet?
122
00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:56,759
You got it.
123
00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:58,719
Here you are.
124
00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:00,839
That's the head.
125
00:07:00,840 --> 00:07:03,919
And that's a little arm there.
126
00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:07,319
Oh, sweet! Looks like you, Pete.
127
00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:09,599
Only taller!
128
00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:14,840
Sssshhh! It's on! It's on! Gavin!
Gavin! Gav-lar.
129
00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:17,519
..is at the scene.
130
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:22,199
I'm standing in the car park of a
large engineering firm here in
Billericay.
131
00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:27,239
At approximately 7.30 this morning,
a dismembered body,
as yet unidentified,
132
00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:30,799
was discovered by
a Mr Michael Shipman, 53,
133
00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:35,199
who's one of the company directors
and this is what he had to say.
134
00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:39,199
It's the last thing you
expect to find when you come
into work in the morning.
135
00:07:39,200 --> 00:07:42,639
Later I spoke to Police
Detective Richard Shed.
136
00:07:42,640 --> 00:07:48,519
Detective, what can you tell me
about the situation regarding
the body and how it was found?
137
00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:53,879
I'm afraid I can't disclose
anything. Detective, thank you very
much. Back to you in the studio.
138
00:07:53,880 --> 00:07:59,240
- A study of obesity released
today claims that many male...
- Is that it?
139
00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:04,359
Is that IT?
140
00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:06,719
Was that it?
141
00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:11,559
Well, I'm bitterly disappointed.
Crikey, Dad, it was
hardly worth mentioning!
142
00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:16,039
Don't switch it off, maybe he'll
come back on. I spoke to them for
more than 15 minutes.
143
00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:20,119
Saying my thoughts went out
to her family and all sorts.
Oh, that was nice.
144
00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:21,959
They've made you look a right tit.
145
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:27,599
I know. I know! What a joke. He says
he talked to them for half an hour.
146
00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:31,879
He'll have spoken to them
for at least 15 minutes,
if not half an hour.
147
00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:36,919
What makes you say that?
Well, when I was news producing for
the BBC, that was the golden rule.
148
00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:40,359
You had to cover every base,
leave no stone unturned.
149
00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:43,439
Kate Adie used to moan
about it all the time.
150
00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:49,079
In the end, I had to say to her,
"Oh, Kate Adie, you're the face,
I'm the brains. Now get on with it."
151
00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:50,719
She was very difficult.
152
00:08:50,720 --> 00:08:53,079
Horrible woman. Selfish.
153
00:08:53,080 --> 00:08:55,199
Nah, go on, who's this?
154
00:08:55,200 --> 00:09:00,439
"Well, you just don't expect it when
you come into work in the morning!"
Yeah, all right, all right.
155
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:01,599
Go on, Gav, you do it!
156
00:09:01,600 --> 00:09:06,960
"Well, you just don't expect it when
you come into work in the morning!"
157
00:09:08,880 --> 00:09:13,519
That looks lovely! What is that!
It's really easy. It's garlic,
olive oil and rosemary
158
00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:18,399
and I've bashed it all together in
the pestle. Now, is the pestle the
bowl or is that the mortar?
159
00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:22,079
You know what Pete, I don't know.
I've just always called
it the pestle.
160
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:26,759
I'm gonna look that up. Wikipedia.
What I've done is massaged it,
rubbed it over the joint.
161
00:09:26,760 --> 00:09:31,759
And then let it stand marinading for
an hour. An hour? An hour? An hour.
That is brave.
162
00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:33,479
And it's not too overpowering?
163
00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:35,719
Because none of it is penetrating
the meat.
164
00:09:35,720 --> 00:09:40,399
It's just permeating through. And
you wait till you taste the gravy!
165
00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:45,960
Can I ask you a personal question?
Sure.
166
00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:49,599
Where did you get them oven gloves?
167
00:09:49,600 --> 00:09:53,479
I tell you why I'm asking.
Dawn got me a pair last Christmas.
168
00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:56,319
I loved the colour.
It was like a charcoal grey.
169
00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:58,999
Ooh, nice. But I swear, I could have
only picked up two,
170
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:02,959
three baking trays, four at tops,
and they melted straight through.
171
00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:07,280
And you never replaced them? No.
So what you on now, tea towels?
172
00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:12,959
Yep. That's not good.
You're a fool. See that blister?
That's tea towels.
173
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:15,840
Here, give these a try.
174
00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:24,760
Yeah, that is nice.
175
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:39,639
Can't feel a thing.
176
00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:45,080
Look, don't get me wrong, we LIKE
having them here, it's just...
177
00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:50,679
Thing is, she can do no wrong in
his eyes, or Mick's for that matter.
178
00:10:50,680 --> 00:10:55,639
It's difficult, isn't it?
What about the eating, then?
She still think you're vegetarian?
179
00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:58,519
I can't tell her, Dawn.
The lie's too deep.
180
00:10:58,520 --> 00:11:03,879
I'm in it up to my neck!
We're going on an animal rights demo
in a fortnight! I couldn't give a
181
00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:08,439
shit about the fox. What's that?
What? Nothing, darling.
182
00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:11,240
Yeah, you were saying something.
183
00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:13,759
Oh, it's nothing.
184
00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:18,079
Look, if it's about the threesome,
you can talk about it in
front of me. I don't mind.
185
00:11:18,080 --> 00:11:22,039
Yeah. It was about the three-way.
186
00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:26,080
What's the latest on that front?
187
00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:29,599
Well, we are still looking...
188
00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:31,599
Ooh, isn't it exciting?
189
00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:33,839
But it's definitely not Seth.
190
00:11:33,840 --> 00:11:35,799
He's a complete no-go.
191
00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:38,079
Pete's flown him back to Ghana.
192
00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:40,159
Probably for the best.
193
00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:41,999
Aw, there's a shame, he was lush.
194
00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:47,639
Well, we do have a few more irons
in the fire, but I can't say too
much cos I don't want to jinx it.
195
00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:50,080
Is one of them Mick?
196
00:11:53,560 --> 00:11:58,799
I don't see why,
if we're pulling it out to here,
why we can't move the door and all.
197
00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:02,039
I'm worried about that RSJ.
198
00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:03,879
Yeah.
199
00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:06,320
Do you know what an RSJ is?
200
00:12:06,720 --> 00:12:08,320
No.
201
00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:10,999
It's a Rolled Steel Joist. What?
202
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,599
Rolled Steel Joist.
203
00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:15,479
Rolled Steel Joyce.
204
00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:17,439
Not, Joyce it's not a...it's joist!
205
00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:21,999
Rolled Steel Joist.
Joist, joist, rolled steel joist.
206
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:26,879
Do you know where those details are
for the flats we're gonna look at?
Under the coffee table.
207
00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:30,559
We're gonna need to measure the
distance from here to that wall.
208
00:12:30,560 --> 00:12:37,199
Here, give it here then.
Stace, you in the shower? Yeah.
209
00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:40,239
Well, just ignore me, won't be a sec.
210
00:12:40,240 --> 00:12:41,719
Pam!
211
00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:45,359
What's that? Five point eight.
212
00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:52,240
See? That should be long enough.
There's even room for a heated
towel rail! Cheers, Stace.
213
00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:14,479
Oh, is it giving you jip, love?
Yeah.
214
00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:18,239
I not gonna lie to you.
Do you want your sling?
215
00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:21,319
No, I gotta ride it out.
216
00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:25,639
I'm off soon anyway. Where is Bryn?
He should have been here by now.
217
00:13:25,640 --> 00:13:30,439
You doin' me an omelette for the
trip, like? I'm just lettin' it
cool, love. Cheese and ham.
218
00:13:30,440 --> 00:13:35,519
Where've you been? I've been ringing
and ringing. I've been watching
Brokeback Mountain. Again?
219
00:13:35,520 --> 00:13:40,319
You watched it twice yesterday!
I can't get enough of it.
Every shot is like a photograph.
220
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:44,279
You just loves that
Heath Ledger, don't you?
I think he's a cracking actor.
221
00:13:44,280 --> 00:13:47,679
But then again, so is Jake.
And the two of them together...
222
00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:49,439
Double bubble.
223
00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:51,439
Right, are we ready for the off?
224
00:13:51,440 --> 00:13:55,799
I'm still waiting on this omelette.
Gwen, what's occurring? Yes!
225
00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:58,639
All right Bryn, let's do one.
226
00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:02,519
I'm so sorry, babes. She doesn't
think. Were you completely naked?
227
00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:04,319
Yeah! My full foof and everything!
228
00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:05,999
Oh, man! I'm sorry.
229
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:11,040
Is it right onto Picton Avenue?
Yeah, right and then it
should be up there on the left.
230
00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:28,319
Not sure about this, are you?
231
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:32,639
We haven't been inside yet.
Gav-lar!
232
00:14:32,640 --> 00:14:35,239
Up here! Hiya!
233
00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:38,359
All right, you pair of pricks! All
right! What you doing here?
234
00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:43,359
Come to look at a flat.
Gavin-lar! Deano.
235
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:47,599
You've not met Stace, have you?
No. Yeah!
236
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:51,079
Oh, no, we haven't actually
met, but I saw a photo of you.
237
00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:55,239
You were wearing a white dress,
standing outside a church.
238
00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:58,759
I think it might have
been someone's wedding.
239
00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:01,839
Yeah, probably. So what are
you two actually doing up there?
240
00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:04,799
Fitting a satellite.
You know us, Stace...
241
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:07,519
Satisfaction with every erection.
242
00:15:07,520 --> 00:15:11,319
Not that he's satisfying
anyone with his erections lately.
243
00:15:11,320 --> 00:15:15,119
Absolutely gagging for it. How
many did you shift out last night?
244
00:15:15,120 --> 00:15:20,359
Shut up, mate, I wasn't... Four,
wasn't it? He sent me a text saying
he cracked four in under two hours.
245
00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:23,999
This is not meant for the delicate
ears of a young lady like yourself.
246
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:29,079
Don't worry about it, I'm just the
same. Being at home doing nothing,
it just passes the time.
247
00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:34,319
Like yesterday, I had three
just watching Cash In The Attic.
I think it's lush!
248
00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:38,879
So you're still all right to pick
Ness up, aren't you? Yeah.
249
00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:44,119
And we thought we'd go
bowling or something. Bowling?
Arrrgghh. Whose idea was that, hers?
250
00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:48,999
It'll be a laugh.
Yeah! She loves it.
She's not my girlfriend or anything.
251
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,799
Well, you are the father of...
252
00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:56,239
Yes, I'm the father of her child,
it doesn't mean I have to like her.
You comin', Deano? Bowling? Nah.
253
00:15:56,240 --> 00:16:00,239
Scared of the shoes. Come on, we're
gonna be late. See ya!
254
00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:02,759
On the morrow, young Galahad!
255
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:05,799
How about her
getting her five a day?
256
00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:07,839
That's the Welsh for you, mate.
257
00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:11,000
Filth. The lot of 'em.
258
00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:30,799
David. Bryn. All right, Ness.
How's it going?
259
00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:33,119
All right, Dave. How's it going?
260
00:16:33,120 --> 00:16:35,879
Business is booming I see.
Yeah, not bad.
261
00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:38,239
A lot of these
are going to Tussauds.
262
00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:40,479
And how are you keeping
within yourself?
263
00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:44,359
Up and down, Bryn.
It's been a tricky few months.
I won't lie to you.
264
00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:46,239
I heard. I heard about the problems.
265
00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:48,679
Not from me, Dave.
My lips are sealed.
266
00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:50,999
Cheers, Ness. I appreciate that.
267
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:55,559
I only wish they had been at the
time, like. Very nasty business.
Spread like wildfire.
268
00:16:55,560 --> 00:17:01,599
Are we all cleared up now?
Pretty much. I'm into the
back end of it. I'll say.
269
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:06,159
I miss you, Ness. I miss you being
around. Why don't you come the barn
dance? What's that?
270
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:09,999
Gwen's birthday on the 28th. We're
short on numbers, aren't we, Bryn?
271
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:12,959
Yes, and no. I've still not heard
back from people so...
272
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:15,679
One more can't hurt though, can it?
Well...
273
00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:18,119
What do you reckon, Dave?
You know me, Ness.
274
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:19,959
I loves a barn dance.
275
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:22,160
But it's up to Bryn.
276
00:17:26,600 --> 00:17:29,439
Oh. What's occurring?
277
00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:31,519
Nothing, nothing at all.
278
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,159
It'll be great to have you there.
279
00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:36,999
Cracking, count me in.
Fancy a little Dozy Do, Ness?
280
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:41,879
I think I've had enough doses from
you for the time being, thanks Dave.
I know. I'm sorry.
281
00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:44,319
I shouldn't have asked. Right, well.
282
00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:46,440
Safe journey, Ness.
283
00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:54,679
Oh, and Dave.
It's a surprise it is, the party,
so keep it under your hat.
284
00:17:54,680 --> 00:17:57,319
Party? What party?
285
00:17:57,320 --> 00:18:00,760
Gwen's.
286
00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:10,159
What's the matter? Nothing.
Yes there is. What's up? Nothing!
287
00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:14,639
You've got to go into
these things... With an open mind.
I know. You said three times.
288
00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:17,999
Guys! I am so, so sorry.
289
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,799
I thought...
290
00:18:19,800 --> 00:18:25,159
Anyway, I'm Duncan. You must be
Gavin, and you must be Stacey.
291
00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:26,839
I'm only kidding!
292
00:18:26,840 --> 00:18:29,959
Pleased to meet you.
293
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:36,079
Now, I'm gonna hand you the
keys because, the wow factor
is on the other side of the door.
294
00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:38,599
Follow me.
295
00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:42,079
So, I'll, er...
296
00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:44,839
let you find the flat
for yourselves.
297
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:47,319
Let you absorb,
298
00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:50,039
take it all in. Take in the space.
299
00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:52,999
There's something beautiful about
that, isn't there?
300
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:57,439
So this is it?
Yeah, this is a studio flat.
301
00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:00,079
It says a large studio.
302
00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:04,479
It is. Is it? Well, compared to a
lot on our books, this is massive.
303
00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:07,999
This is your
living cum kitchen cum bedroom area
304
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:11,959
and that's what makes this unique,
because you've got everything.
305
00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:16,359
I mean, I live in a three-storey
town house, and believe me,
those stairs are a killer.
306
00:19:16,360 --> 00:19:18,599
Room on each floor.
307
00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:20,719
Made a big mistake there, really.
308
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:27,319
I should have bought this place.
Stupid! And there's your bathroom.
So it's on the market for two...
309
00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:30,639
Can I have a look?
What? At the bathroom.
310
00:19:30,640 --> 00:19:33,959
Well, yeah. All I would say
sometimes your eyes can...
311
00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:36,840
Can we look at the
bathroom, please? Yep.
312
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:44,879
It hasn't even got a shower.
It's just a toilet and a sink.
Yeah, "Hasn't got a shower"
313
00:19:44,880 --> 00:19:49,479
or "Hasn't got a shower where you
thinked it should have been".
Take a look at this.
314
00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:56,439
Now, what you've got here, is
a wet room slash kitchen. See that?
315
00:19:56,440 --> 00:20:01,839
Drainage. In Sweden they've all got
one of these - they call it
"Das Vetkutchen".
316
00:20:01,840 --> 00:20:05,680
I tell you what, Stacey,
come and stand here. Come on.
317
00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:11,839
And Gav...in.
Gavin, come and hold this.
No, you're all right.
318
00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:14,439
Just come and hold this.
Nah, it's fine, really.
319
00:20:14,440 --> 00:20:17,279
I'm not gonna turn the taps on.
320
00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:19,319
There you go.
321
00:20:19,320 --> 00:20:22,520
That's it. Move it around a bit.
322
00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:27,920
Yeah, there's something
quite beautiful about that.
323
00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:31,880
I'd like to leave now, please.
324
00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:42,879
Eight and a half, thanks. Gav! They
were disgusting. Every one of them.
Four, please.
325
00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:46,039
I can't believe you're even
considering any of them. I'm not.
326
00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:49,999
We've got to be realistic.
For that money you can get a lush
place in Barry.
327
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:53,479
There's a reason for that.
What's that supposed to mean?
328
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:57,319
There's a reason houses are cheap
in Barry. Why do you always slag
Barry off?
329
00:20:57,320 --> 00:21:01,999
It's difficult living with a person
who thinks Barry Island's the best
place in the world,
330
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:07,039
who can't acknowledge that it ever
even rains there. It doesn't rain
there much. Don't be like this.
331
00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:08,719
Gavin Da Jahah Jahah!
332
00:21:08,720 --> 00:21:13,839
All right, Smith? Nessa? How's it
going, Gav? All right, Stace?
Not really.
333
00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:17,839
Cos someone who'll remain nameless
is being a knob.
She's talking about you.
334
00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:20,839
Yeah, I imagine so.
You need some shoes.
335
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:25,039
She's got her own.
I takes bowling very seriously.
Shall we get some drinks?
336
00:21:25,040 --> 00:21:29,999
Yeah, sure. See you on the lanes.
Did you bring yer ball?
She's in the case. What's up?
337
00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:32,039
Don't ask.
338
00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:34,079
I've just had enough of it, Ness.
339
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:37,479
I got nothing to do all day.
I just don't feel like I live there.
340
00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:39,759
I always feel like I'm
a guest, you know? I do.
341
00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:42,199
What you doing?
342
00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:46,919
Shining her up. She's not been down
the lanes in a long while this one.
343
00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:50,239
A bit of polish
sends her on her way.
344
00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:54,599
Don't say anything though. About
what? About what I was just saying.
No, course not.
345
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:57,679
It's just at the moment, you know?
She's doing my head in.
346
00:21:57,680 --> 00:22:01,279
Smithy, do you want to
go in as Smithy or do
you want me to do a funny name?
347
00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:03,919
Like Gay Boy?
I've put Gav down as Knobhead.
348
00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:06,959
Just put him in as Smithy. Come on.
349
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:09,039
I'm itching to bowl.
350
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:16,040
Wow. I've never seen one like that
before. You've never seen anyone
bowl like this before.
351
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:51,599
Right, who gets eleven strikes?
I mean, what are you, semi-pro?
352
00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:56,519
It does matter and I can't believe
you don't think it does. I think
renting... What are you saying?
353
00:22:56,520 --> 00:22:59,679
If you shut up for a minute and
stopped shouting like a child.
354
00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:04,079
Oh, Stace! What's occurring?
I don't want to talk about it.
I just want to go home.
355
00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:08,559
You all right, mate? Stacey!
Can we please talk about this?
I want to go home! Right.
356
00:23:08,560 --> 00:23:13,039
Do you mean Barry Island, or you
know, Mum and Dad's, where we live?
Oh, grow up, Gav.
357
00:23:13,040 --> 00:23:17,679
ME grow up? I'm not the one who
can't spend more than five minutes
away from their family.
358
00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:21,719
Did you hear that, Ness?
I'm not getting involved.
Let's all get in the car.
359
00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:26,240
I thought we were getting a KFC?
We're not getting a KFC. What?!
360
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:30,160
Three door, innit? Yep.
361
00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:42,039
It's one rule for you
and one rule for me.
362
00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:44,519
That's simply not true! It is!
I'm trying to...
363
00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:50,359
I'm sick of you, I'm sick of this
house I'm sick of the way you...
Oi! Oi! What's going on? Nothing!
364
00:23:50,360 --> 00:23:53,679
Will you just calm down a minute.
It doesn't sound like nothing.
365
00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:54,999
Everything all right?
366
00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:59,119
Don't worry, Pam. Your little
Prince is fine. Eh? Stacey!
367
00:23:59,120 --> 00:24:04,799
What's going on? I don't know, Pam.
All I know is if I don't
eat this now I'm gonna faint.
368
00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:06,639
Me too. I can barely breathe.
369
00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:10,479
What have I told you about
eating late at night?
All that cholesterol.
370
00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:13,319
It's only a six piece.
And we got coleslaw.
371
00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:17,079
Well done, darlings. Now, Nessa, you
know where you're sleeping, do you?
372
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:18,679
Yeah, thanks, Pam. Cracking.
373
00:24:18,680 --> 00:24:22,840
Night, God bless.
Just help yourselves to whatever.
374
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:30,719
What are you doing? Leave them be,
woman. Come on.
Don't you "woman" me.
375
00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:35,719
He's my only son. I've got a
right to know what's going on.
No, he's a grown man, Pam.
376
00:24:35,720 --> 00:24:42,840
You're gettin' on my wick, Mick.
Then we'll wait a few more months.
A few months!
377
00:24:45,120 --> 00:24:46,199
Oh!
378
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:49,679
MOANING
379
00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:52,599
Oh, God.
380
00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:58,399
Oh, that is so good.
381
00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:00,239
Yeah.
382
00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:02,079
You just can't beat it, can you?
383
00:25:02,080 --> 00:25:08,240
What is that secret blend of
eleven herbs and spices, d'you think?
I know. The result is immense.
384
00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:11,919
So. How you finding single life?
385
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,639
What was her name again?
Lucy. Yeah, it's fine.
386
00:25:14,640 --> 00:25:19,559
It's all right. I mean, there's some
things I miss, obviously.
387
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:23,199
Yeah. Stace was saying you been
crackin' them out of late.
388
00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:24,919
What?
389
00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:27,839
Why would she... I can't believe...
390
00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:32,040
Don't worry about it. It's normal.
I'm in a similar position myself.
391
00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:34,559
Right.
392
00:25:34,560 --> 00:25:37,759
D'you want that corn on the cob?
393
00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:46,560
Is that a euphemism? What?
No, I'm just saying there's one corn
on the cob left and you can have it.
394
00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:56,480
If you want it.
395
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:03,920
Do you want me to have it?
396
00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:08,759
I can see the benefits of having it.
397
00:26:08,760 --> 00:26:11,519
I'd just be worried how you...
398
00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:17,200
or I would feel after having it.
399
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:21,279
Makes no odds to me, as it goes.
400
00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:27,400
If I have it it'll be a nice
addition to the meal, if I don't...
then, I'm pretty full up already.
401
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:30,760
The question is, Smithy,
402
00:26:31,640 --> 00:26:34,680
do you want the corn on the cob?
403
00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:40,160
Don't get me wrong.
404
00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:42,799
When I look at it there,
405
00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:47,679
all hot and dripping in butter,
just...
406
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:49,920
inviting me in,
407
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:53,039
I've got a real hankering for it.
408
00:26:53,040 --> 00:26:55,600
Like a real need. Mmm...
409
00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:58,119
But I would just be worried that if
410
00:26:58,120 --> 00:27:01,519
I ate it tonight, I'd be
expected to eat it more frequently.
411
00:27:01,520 --> 00:27:04,079
I wouldn't worry about that,
if I was you.
412
00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:09,319
Corn on the cob is a once in a blue
moon treat as far as I'm concerned,
which once eaten is soon forgotten.
413
00:27:09,320 --> 00:27:12,679
It won't be mentioned ever again.
414
00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:15,600
To anyone.
415
00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:19,360
Well, that's good to know.
416
00:27:22,280 --> 00:27:25,760
# My mind's telling me no
417
00:27:29,120 --> 00:27:35,199
# But my body, my body is
telling me yes
418
00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:36,839
# Baby
419
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:41,719
# I don't want to hurt nobody
420
00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:47,799
# But there is something that
I must confess
421
00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:49,239
Oh, God.
422
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:52,680
So, shall we... Yeah.
35583
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