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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,292 --> 00:00:08,010 ♪ These rivers are frozen ♪ 2 00:00:08,095 --> 00:00:11,387 ♪ It's hard to say if it will be alright ♪ 3 00:00:11,472 --> 00:00:13,479 Medical schools often ask applicants 4 00:00:13,564 --> 00:00:16,276 for an essay describing a time they faced adversity... 5 00:00:16,368 --> 00:00:18,815 ♪ ...has broken ♪ 6 00:00:18,900 --> 00:00:20,042 and how they overcame it. 7 00:00:20,127 --> 00:00:22,272 ♪ Everything that I have built inside ♪ 8 00:00:22,357 --> 00:00:24,109 They want to know how people will cope 9 00:00:24,193 --> 00:00:25,985 with the challenges they'll face as a doctor. 10 00:00:26,069 --> 00:00:28,571 ♪ I'm chasing my shadow ♪ 11 00:00:30,899 --> 00:00:34,577 ♪ Lately he's been the only friend of mine ♪ 12 00:00:36,914 --> 00:00:39,618 Some students worry they have nothing to write about. 13 00:00:39,751 --> 00:00:42,579 ♪ And I don't know which way to go ♪ 14 00:00:45,664 --> 00:00:48,298 - ♪ Lost my mind to the unknown ♪ - They haven't faced difficulty. 15 00:00:51,399 --> 00:00:56,892 ♪ Even if I stay here always ♪ 16 00:00:56,977 --> 00:01:01,376 ♪ I'll keep holding on ♪ 17 00:01:01,546 --> 00:01:04,674 ♪ For you ♪ 18 00:01:04,759 --> 00:01:07,376 ♪ You ♪ 19 00:01:07,524 --> 00:01:08,454 ♪ I'll be waiting ♪ 20 00:01:08,539 --> 00:01:11,165 - I didn't have that problem. - ♪ Till we meet again ♪ 21 00:01:11,903 --> 00:01:13,923 - ♪ Till we meet again ♪ - Morning, Meredith. 22 00:01:18,042 --> 00:01:19,995 *GREY's ANATOMY* Season 17 Episode 04 23 00:01:20,094 --> 00:01:22,151 Episode Title: "You'll Never Walk Alone" 24 00:01:22,235 --> 00:01:24,235 Aired on: December 03, 2020 25 00:01:24,898 --> 00:01:27,315 Uh, let's start with regional updates. 26 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:28,696 Uh, Hunt? 27 00:01:29,151 --> 00:01:31,486 Shouldn't we start with an update on Meredith Grey? 28 00:01:31,765 --> 00:01:33,683 Yeah. I mean, has her I. S. improved? 29 00:01:33,768 --> 00:01:35,269 Yeah. Is she on a proning schedule? 30 00:01:35,354 --> 00:01:37,272 People, people. I know we're all concerned, 31 00:01:37,357 --> 00:01:39,191 but Meredith is getting excellent care 32 00:01:39,276 --> 00:01:40,569 from Altman and DeLuca. 33 00:01:40,654 --> 00:01:42,214 She's stable and she's resting. 34 00:01:42,299 --> 00:01:43,925 In the meantime, we have a hospital 35 00:01:44,010 --> 00:01:45,678 full of patients who need us. 36 00:01:45,763 --> 00:01:46,799 Hunt? 37 00:01:46,884 --> 00:01:51,346 Yesterday Seattle reported 345 more cases, 29 deaths. 38 00:01:51,431 --> 00:01:53,974 Test positivity rate has increased to 4.7%, 39 00:01:54,059 --> 00:01:55,987 so we should prepare for more patients. 40 00:01:56,072 --> 00:01:57,030 COVID ICU? 41 00:01:57,115 --> 00:01:58,760 Beds are at 68% capacity. 42 00:01:58,845 --> 00:02:00,305 We'll likely need more by the end of the month. 43 00:02:00,389 --> 00:02:03,434 53 of the 72 ventilators are currently in use. 44 00:02:03,519 --> 00:02:05,562 Are there any cases that warrant discussion? 45 00:02:05,760 --> 00:02:07,636 Hi. Hello. 46 00:02:07,845 --> 00:02:09,972 - I've got one. Me. - K‐Koracick? How did you... 47 00:02:10,057 --> 00:02:12,216 I‐I've got connections. I'm emeritus chief of chiefs. 48 00:02:12,301 --> 00:02:13,135 That is not a thing. 49 00:02:13,220 --> 00:02:15,152 As I'm sure Hunt gleefully told you, 50 00:02:15,237 --> 00:02:16,698 I tested positive for COVID. 51 00:02:16,783 --> 00:02:18,534 But I think the test was a dud. 52 00:02:18,619 --> 00:02:20,204 Breathing's normal, good heart rate, 53 00:02:20,289 --> 00:02:21,539 singing voice unaffected... 54 00:02:21,624 --> 00:02:23,034 That does not change the rules. 55 00:02:23,119 --> 00:02:25,721 A negative COVID test or a 14‐day quarantine. 56 00:02:25,806 --> 00:02:28,237 You're not even close. Then send me a new test. 57 00:02:28,322 --> 00:02:30,487 And can you adjust my camera angle? 58 00:02:30,572 --> 00:02:33,065 As lovely as the ceiling is, I... 59 00:02:43,332 --> 00:02:46,276 Did you know that there are murder hornets now? 60 00:02:46,389 --> 00:02:47,971 - What? - Yeah. 61 00:02:48,056 --> 00:02:50,916 As if the COVID outbreak right after my husband dumped me 62 00:02:51,001 --> 00:02:52,669 wasn't bad enough. 63 00:02:52,754 --> 00:02:56,278 I'm gonna go home, crawl into bed before my next shift. 64 00:02:56,362 --> 00:02:58,426 Yeah, I'm done, too. Look, if you don't want to be alone, 65 00:02:58,510 --> 00:02:59,618 you can come hang out at my place. 66 00:02:59,702 --> 00:03:02,162 Um, let me think about the last time I went to your place 67 00:03:02,246 --> 00:03:03,502 and... no. 68 00:03:03,587 --> 00:03:07,339 At least I don't have a resident living on my couch, okay? 69 00:03:07,424 --> 00:03:09,487 I got fancy beer and a negative COVID test. 70 00:03:09,572 --> 00:03:12,136 I guess also April switched Harriett's days on me, but... 71 00:03:12,221 --> 00:03:14,133 Oh, so you're lonely. 72 00:03:14,217 --> 00:03:16,019 Will you just come over, alright? 73 00:03:16,104 --> 00:03:19,273 We can watch TV and, I don't know, order pizza. Or sushi. 74 00:03:19,358 --> 00:03:20,651 Start over. 75 00:03:20,736 --> 00:03:22,980 Friendship reboot. 76 00:03:23,507 --> 00:03:25,362 We're getting both and you're paying. 77 00:03:25,447 --> 00:03:27,531 - Fine. - And no Kenny G! 78 00:03:30,151 --> 00:03:31,485 Hey, buddy. 79 00:03:31,897 --> 00:03:33,479 Yeah. 80 00:03:33,948 --> 00:03:35,956 Just me and you. 81 00:03:38,366 --> 00:03:39,964 This is called a "C" chord. 82 00:03:41,284 --> 00:03:42,573 I'll teach you one day. 83 00:03:42,658 --> 00:03:44,704 Why can't I find gauze in a house 84 00:03:44,789 --> 00:03:46,589 with so many surgeons living in it? 85 00:03:46,674 --> 00:03:48,341 Uh, who's bleeding this time? 86 00:03:48,426 --> 00:03:50,052 Bailey lost a tooth. 87 00:03:50,137 --> 00:03:51,681 The one that's been loose for two weeks? 88 00:03:51,765 --> 00:03:52,974 That's supposed to happen. 89 00:03:53,059 --> 00:03:55,644 Well, not when your mom is in the hospital with COVID. 90 00:03:55,883 --> 00:03:57,340 Mer's gonna get better. 91 00:03:57,425 --> 00:03:58,927 You don't know that's true. 92 00:03:59,011 --> 00:04:00,527 You don't know that it's not. 93 00:04:00,612 --> 00:04:02,513 Alright, look, um, 94 00:04:02,948 --> 00:04:05,392 let's... let's look at the bright side of things, okay? 95 00:04:05,476 --> 00:04:07,503 We get to introduce Bailey to the Tooth Fairy. 96 00:04:07,588 --> 00:04:09,548 Kids love the Tooth Fairy. 97 00:04:09,772 --> 00:04:11,534 I'll, uh... I'll check on him. 98 00:04:13,245 --> 00:04:14,579 The bright side? 99 00:04:17,143 --> 00:04:21,105 Dr. Kuo at the Catherine Fox Medical Center in Manhattan 100 00:04:21,190 --> 00:04:24,526 is doing a trial with monoclonal antibodies for COVID. 101 00:04:24,611 --> 00:04:26,543 She's got room for two more patients, but we got to jump on it. 102 00:04:26,627 --> 00:04:28,574 I read that study. Didn't three patients die? 103 00:04:28,659 --> 00:04:31,008 Well, there's a strong chance that they got the drug too late. 104 00:04:31,092 --> 00:04:32,968 Dr. Webber, her lungs are flooded, 105 00:04:33,053 --> 00:04:35,096 a‐and she's sleeping almost around the clock. 106 00:04:35,181 --> 00:04:36,895 Richard, I would never give this recommendation 107 00:04:36,979 --> 00:04:39,237 if I didn't think that the good outweighed the bad. 108 00:04:41,606 --> 00:04:43,721 Thank you. I'll... I'll think about it. 109 00:04:43,806 --> 00:04:45,308 Okay. 110 00:04:45,948 --> 00:04:47,004 Dr. Webber... 111 00:04:47,089 --> 00:04:49,478 I said I'd think about it. 112 00:04:56,533 --> 00:04:58,761 Mom, I can't come see you. 113 00:04:59,197 --> 00:05:01,115 Because of the pandemic, remember? 114 00:05:01,199 --> 00:05:04,472 There's a bad virus and no vaccine yet. 115 00:05:04,557 --> 00:05:06,808 But I can call you later, though, okay? 116 00:05:06,954 --> 00:05:08,597 I... Mnh. 117 00:05:08,682 --> 00:05:10,331 How you feeling, Chief? 118 00:05:10,603 --> 00:05:13,189 I moved my parents here from across the country 119 00:05:13,274 --> 00:05:16,964 into an assisted‐living facility just in time to never see them. 120 00:05:17,452 --> 00:05:20,277 I meant your ankle. But sorry to hear that. 121 00:05:20,426 --> 00:05:21,635 It's fine. Thank you. 122 00:05:21,719 --> 00:05:23,902 Hello? Can someone help me? 123 00:05:25,515 --> 00:05:26,792 Hi. I'm Dr. Kim. 124 00:05:30,131 --> 00:05:31,674 Where are you from? 125 00:05:31,759 --> 00:05:34,481 Orthopedics. And it looks like you just have a cut here, 126 00:05:34,566 --> 00:05:36,024 so let's find you another doctor 127 00:05:36,108 --> 00:05:37,683 who can help take care of this, okay? 128 00:05:42,730 --> 00:05:44,058 Orthopedics? 129 00:05:44,143 --> 00:05:45,703 You know that's not what she was asking. 130 00:05:45,868 --> 00:05:47,887 - I know. - It doesn't bother you? 131 00:05:47,972 --> 00:05:49,667 Her assuming you're not from here? 132 00:05:49,752 --> 00:05:51,659 Happens to all of us at some point, right? 133 00:05:53,618 --> 00:05:56,037 - What do we have? - Dave Oyadomari, 37, 134 00:05:56,122 --> 00:05:57,462 head lac and right shoulder pain 135 00:05:57,547 --> 00:05:59,086 after falling off of a step ladder. 136 00:05:59,215 --> 00:06:01,704 He also complains of abdominal pain, nausea, and vomiting 137 00:06:01,789 --> 00:06:02,938 with a 102 fever. 138 00:06:03,023 --> 00:06:05,266 He was recently treated here by Dr. Hunt for appendicitis 139 00:06:05,351 --> 00:06:07,394 then sent home on oral antibiotics. 140 00:06:07,479 --> 00:06:08,848 Yeah. I'll be okay. 141 00:06:08,933 --> 00:06:10,517 Can... Can you just give me some more antibiotics 142 00:06:10,601 --> 00:06:12,102 and... and a sling or something? 143 00:06:12,187 --> 00:06:13,729 You were in so much pain that you fell off a ladder. 144 00:06:13,813 --> 00:06:14,730 I had to call an ambulance! 145 00:06:14,814 --> 00:06:15,907 Meet my wife, Tammi. 146 00:06:15,992 --> 00:06:17,702 Okay. We'll check him out, Tammi. 147 00:06:17,787 --> 00:06:20,071 Uh, he's tachycardic and slightly hypotensive. 148 00:06:20,156 --> 00:06:21,365 Kim. Here. 149 00:06:21,450 --> 00:06:24,625 Let's get him to trauma one and do a COVID test, 150 00:06:24,782 --> 00:06:27,701 STAT X‐rays, labs, and a FAST exam. 151 00:06:27,785 --> 00:06:29,157 Got it. 152 00:06:35,538 --> 00:06:37,758 You trying to will her into joining the trial? 153 00:06:37,966 --> 00:06:39,430 No. 154 00:06:40,490 --> 00:06:43,159 I'm hoping she suddenly gets better and doesn't need it. 155 00:07:01,912 --> 00:07:03,899 Excuse me! 156 00:07:09,975 --> 00:07:11,391 Hello?! 157 00:07:20,351 --> 00:07:21,805 Mer? 158 00:07:22,214 --> 00:07:23,625 George?! 159 00:07:24,771 --> 00:07:27,094 What are you doing here? 160 00:07:46,852 --> 00:07:48,666 Did you ask the humans to take you to their leader? 161 00:07:48,750 --> 00:07:49,939 Because it's no longer me. 162 00:07:50,024 --> 00:07:51,856 It's Dr. Helm. I'm here to do your COVID test. 163 00:07:51,940 --> 00:07:53,532 No, you're here to deliver it. 164 00:07:53,617 --> 00:07:55,443 I don't allow residents in my house or up my nose. 165 00:07:55,527 --> 00:07:58,227 Uh, just put it down. Right here. 166 00:07:59,781 --> 00:08:00,914 Back up. 167 00:08:01,241 --> 00:08:03,212 Back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back. 168 00:08:03,296 --> 00:08:05,047 Bup, bup, bup, bup, bup. 169 00:08:15,339 --> 00:08:16,993 Did you know that I had COVID? 170 00:08:17,078 --> 00:08:18,996 It was mild, but scary. 171 00:08:19,254 --> 00:08:21,321 I learned how to make sourdough. 172 00:08:21,478 --> 00:08:25,398 I couldn't taste it or smell it, but the texture seemed right. 173 00:08:25,703 --> 00:08:29,555 I also, uh, binged a docuseries about house... 174 00:08:29,699 --> 00:08:32,312 You can stop your "What I did over COVID vacation" report. 175 00:08:32,397 --> 00:08:33,648 I have no interest in baking, bingeing, 176 00:08:33,732 --> 00:08:35,649 or doing anything you did or will ever do or... 177 00:08:36,007 --> 00:08:37,050 What? 178 00:08:38,331 --> 00:08:41,727 Are you plotting something... evil? 179 00:08:41,812 --> 00:08:44,078 No. I'm stopping the pandemic. 180 00:08:51,899 --> 00:08:55,977 Chopped chicken salad with homemade sweet pickles 181 00:08:56,114 --> 00:08:57,546 on toasted bread. 182 00:08:57,914 --> 00:09:00,329 That's a Nana Ante special right there. 183 00:09:00,414 --> 00:09:02,024 Ooh! Jealous! 184 00:09:02,886 --> 00:09:04,492 I had stale cashews. 185 00:09:04,594 --> 00:09:07,321 Well, mine's nothing compared to hers, but it's not bad. 186 00:09:08,258 --> 00:09:09,712 And I just can't wait for you two to meet. 187 00:09:09,796 --> 00:09:10,963 I hope to, someday. 188 00:09:11,048 --> 00:09:13,289 Tonight too soon? It's her birthday. 189 00:09:13,382 --> 00:09:16,385 And, uh, we're doing a... a virtual dinner. 190 00:09:16,661 --> 00:09:20,247 Or if it's too soon, no rush. 191 00:09:20,361 --> 00:09:22,930 No, no, I just, uh... 192 00:09:23,585 --> 00:09:24,687 It's Meredith. 193 00:09:24,837 --> 00:09:27,381 I‐I know there's nothing I can do, but... 194 00:09:27,536 --> 00:09:29,954 Anything I do that isn't trying to help 195 00:09:30,038 --> 00:09:31,748 just feels selfish and wrong. 196 00:09:31,832 --> 00:09:34,602 Joy is in short supply these days. 197 00:09:34,728 --> 00:09:36,376 Especially our joy. 198 00:09:36,461 --> 00:09:37,754 It sure as hell is. 199 00:09:37,838 --> 00:09:39,703 That's why I'm grabbing it when I can. 200 00:09:39,788 --> 00:09:41,331 You know, it might be a text from you. 201 00:09:41,592 --> 00:09:43,259 It might be the fancy pencils 202 00:09:43,343 --> 00:09:44,961 I bought for my crossword puzzles. 203 00:09:45,046 --> 00:09:47,276 It might be just taking a few minutes 204 00:09:47,361 --> 00:09:49,549 to sit outside with my chicken‐salad sandwich 205 00:09:49,634 --> 00:09:51,595 and look at the daffodils. 206 00:09:52,894 --> 00:09:54,354 I don't mean to tell you how to be. 207 00:09:54,438 --> 00:09:56,356 Uh... are you mad? 208 00:09:56,440 --> 00:09:57,774 - No, no. - Ignore me. Ignore me. 209 00:09:57,858 --> 00:10:01,978 I'm not mad. I'm not mad. I'm... a little hurt maybe. 210 00:10:02,634 --> 00:10:04,613 You got fancy pencils and you didn't tell me? 211 00:10:04,698 --> 00:10:06,324 Wait. Are you a pencil nerd, too? 212 00:10:06,408 --> 00:10:11,220 Oh, I special ordered a vintage pencil sharpener from Paris. 213 00:10:11,438 --> 00:10:13,730 Oh, oh. That's my resident. 214 00:10:14,027 --> 00:10:15,362 And... joy's over. 215 00:10:15,447 --> 00:10:16,655 Until dinner tonight. 216 00:10:16,740 --> 00:10:18,200 Until dinner tonight. 217 00:10:21,026 --> 00:10:23,070 My great‐grandpa was an accountant, 218 00:10:23,155 --> 00:10:26,240 but no one would hire him after he came back from camp. 219 00:10:26,511 --> 00:10:29,861 So he got a job as a line cook in a diner 220 00:10:29,946 --> 00:10:31,845 and eventually started Toyo. 221 00:10:32,429 --> 00:10:34,790 - Where was he interned? - Tule Lake. 222 00:10:34,900 --> 00:10:36,860 My great‐grandparents were sent to Jerome. 223 00:10:37,022 --> 00:10:38,398 I'm Gosei on my mom's side. 224 00:10:38,564 --> 00:10:39,732 Scans up yet? 225 00:10:39,816 --> 00:10:41,447 Yep, just came up. 226 00:10:43,007 --> 00:10:44,315 Dr. Hunt, I read 227 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:46,245 that you initially diagnosed appendicitis, 228 00:10:46,330 --> 00:10:48,032 but these scans show pelvic free fluid 229 00:10:48,116 --> 00:10:49,666 and a paracolonic abscess. 230 00:10:49,751 --> 00:10:52,044 I think he might have right‐sided diverticulitis. 231 00:10:52,245 --> 00:10:53,525 Yep. 232 00:10:53,610 --> 00:10:55,487 And it looks like it's perforated. 233 00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:57,416 Plus, his X‐rays show a broken collarbone. 234 00:10:57,501 --> 00:10:59,221 Okay, book an OR, and I'll meet you up there. 235 00:10:59,305 --> 00:11:00,785 We need to get him up there right now. 236 00:11:00,907 --> 00:11:02,992 Really? We... We as in me? 237 00:11:03,077 --> 00:11:04,783 Yeah, it's your diagnosis. 238 00:11:05,409 --> 00:11:07,161 Good catch, Tseng. 239 00:11:12,525 --> 00:11:13,850 Congratulations. 240 00:11:13,934 --> 00:11:17,270 You just ordered Nathan Ramos a pregnancy test. 241 00:11:17,354 --> 00:11:19,523 What? How?! 242 00:11:21,459 --> 00:11:23,556 - Hey. - Hey. 243 00:11:24,611 --> 00:11:25,611 Hey. 244 00:11:27,447 --> 00:11:29,517 You already said that. 245 00:11:29,630 --> 00:11:31,611 Portable X‐ray to the third floor. 246 00:11:31,711 --> 00:11:33,033 Portable X‐ray to the third floor. 247 00:11:33,118 --> 00:11:35,470 Ooh! He cute. 248 00:11:35,814 --> 00:11:37,705 - No one asked you. - Okay. 249 00:11:37,790 --> 00:11:40,083 Wait. No, no, no. Wait. She kicked you out of bed, 250 00:11:40,168 --> 00:11:42,713 - so you were, like, what, naked? - I'm naked. Naked. 251 00:11:42,805 --> 00:11:45,690 I was naked in bed with my boyfriend, and she just... 252 00:11:45,775 --> 00:11:47,674 and it wasn't just one time either. 253 00:11:47,759 --> 00:11:50,088 I mean, it kind of says less about him than her. 254 00:11:50,173 --> 00:11:51,590 Really, though? Does it? 255 00:11:51,698 --> 00:11:54,095 Yeah. Mer's like a force of nature. 256 00:11:54,420 --> 00:11:56,921 Yeah. That's right. 257 00:11:57,310 --> 00:11:59,563 She's a force of nature. She, um... 258 00:12:02,162 --> 00:12:04,752 She's gonna beat this thing. Right? 259 00:12:06,361 --> 00:12:07,658 Right. 260 00:12:08,050 --> 00:12:10,345 Right. Yeah. 261 00:12:18,356 --> 00:12:20,357 Derek said the sand isn't real. 262 00:12:20,442 --> 00:12:22,569 Yeah, no. Neither is the ocean. 263 00:12:22,654 --> 00:12:24,697 It is nice, though. 264 00:12:26,173 --> 00:12:28,158 I wouldn't want to leave either. 265 00:12:28,678 --> 00:12:29,845 The beach? 266 00:12:30,093 --> 00:12:31,463 Your kids. 267 00:12:34,181 --> 00:12:35,572 Got great kids. 268 00:12:35,797 --> 00:12:39,008 They're the best. You didn't meet them. 269 00:12:39,093 --> 00:12:41,431 I check in sometimes. 270 00:12:42,439 --> 00:12:44,345 How did you get older? 271 00:12:44,690 --> 00:12:47,158 Sand isn't real, the ocean isn't real. 272 00:12:47,243 --> 00:12:49,871 The body... it's not real. 273 00:12:51,306 --> 00:12:55,267 Maybe it's just more peaceful for you to imagine me older? 274 00:12:56,291 --> 00:12:58,869 You sound like a fortune cookie. 275 00:13:09,674 --> 00:13:11,103 Do I choose? 276 00:13:11,426 --> 00:13:14,554 Do I get to decide if I go back? 277 00:13:14,864 --> 00:13:17,509 I don't know. I didn't. 278 00:13:19,545 --> 00:13:23,416 I would have stayed if I could have. 279 00:13:24,109 --> 00:13:26,235 It's different for everyone, though. 280 00:13:38,203 --> 00:13:39,353 She's still asleep? 281 00:13:39,438 --> 00:13:40,980 She needs her rest. 282 00:13:41,164 --> 00:13:43,207 You want to wake her and ask her about the trial? 283 00:13:43,292 --> 00:13:45,409 - I tried. - How hard? 284 00:13:46,947 --> 00:13:48,862 She needs her rest, Bailey. 285 00:13:48,947 --> 00:13:50,843 If you think I'm struggling with the decision, 286 00:13:50,928 --> 00:13:52,722 how do you think she's gonna do? 287 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:57,803 You want to talk pros and cons? 288 00:13:57,973 --> 00:13:59,845 We don't know anything about the virus, 289 00:13:59,930 --> 00:14:02,474 so we don't know anything about the treatment, 290 00:14:02,690 --> 00:14:06,478 so we don't know any of the pros or any of the cons. 291 00:14:06,860 --> 00:14:09,338 Let's just see if the proning helps. 292 00:14:17,588 --> 00:14:21,002 The boy refused to wear anything with buttons. 293 00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:24,028 Collared shirts, slacks, even jeans. 294 00:14:24,143 --> 00:14:26,462 Look. Buttons confine, okay? 295 00:14:26,547 --> 00:14:29,259 Now, elastic waistbands give you freedom. 296 00:14:29,344 --> 00:14:31,494 You better not be wearing elastic waistbands 297 00:14:31,579 --> 00:14:32,627 when you take Maggie out. 298 00:14:32,712 --> 00:14:34,130 I promise you he doesn't. 299 00:14:34,730 --> 00:14:36,338 Oh, is this your brother? 300 00:14:36,423 --> 00:14:37,590 He said he had to work. 301 00:14:37,675 --> 00:14:38,759 Happy Birthday, Momma! 302 00:14:38,844 --> 00:14:40,011 Thanks, baby. 303 00:14:40,183 --> 00:14:41,351 We're actually in the middle of dinner. 304 00:14:41,435 --> 00:14:43,158 Winston, I invited your dad. 305 00:14:43,337 --> 00:14:45,631 And you have to get along because it's my birthday. 306 00:14:45,716 --> 00:14:48,134 So, who is this young lady? 307 00:14:48,219 --> 00:14:50,783 Um, I'm Maggie Pierce. I'm a friend of Winston's. 308 00:14:50,868 --> 00:14:52,088 Friend? Ha. 309 00:14:52,173 --> 00:14:54,798 Maggie's a genius doctor like Winston. 310 00:14:54,883 --> 00:14:56,259 She used to be his teacher. 311 00:14:56,344 --> 00:14:58,314 Winston? A genius? 312 00:14:58,399 --> 00:14:59,689 Oh, stop playin'. 313 00:14:59,774 --> 00:15:02,830 You know that boy almost failed sixth grade. 314 00:15:02,915 --> 00:15:04,416 Such a pain. 315 00:15:04,501 --> 00:15:06,064 Maybe I wouldn't have missed so much class 316 00:15:06,148 --> 00:15:08,630 if I wasn't helping Mom while you gambled away our savings. 317 00:15:08,715 --> 00:15:11,274 - Winston! - Sorry, Nana. No disrespect. 318 00:15:11,359 --> 00:15:14,862 Listen, man, I never pretended to be a perfect man. 319 00:15:14,947 --> 00:15:17,760 But I love you, and I love my momma. 320 00:15:17,845 --> 00:15:23,111 So, please, for her sake, let's try to be civil. 321 00:15:23,196 --> 00:15:24,405 Civil, huh? 322 00:15:26,856 --> 00:15:28,024 Okay. 323 00:15:30,064 --> 00:15:33,038 Happy birthday, Nana. I love you. 324 00:15:33,790 --> 00:15:35,042 Uh... 325 00:15:38,261 --> 00:15:40,088 So, is there cake? 326 00:15:44,481 --> 00:15:46,455 Why are you up so early? 327 00:15:46,540 --> 00:15:48,658 Front desk. I got some breakfast delivered. 328 00:15:48,795 --> 00:15:49,972 Oh, you know what? If I was hungry, 329 00:15:50,056 --> 00:15:51,598 I would have just eaten the cold pizza. 330 00:15:51,683 --> 00:15:53,697 Who said I got you any? 331 00:15:54,061 --> 00:15:56,010 Can't believe I fell asleep. 332 00:15:56,095 --> 00:15:58,729 Never should've started a movie with two sequels. 333 00:15:58,814 --> 00:16:00,148 Prequels. They were prequels. 334 00:16:00,233 --> 00:16:02,860 And I said that, but you called me a wuss. 335 00:16:02,945 --> 00:16:04,321 Why is your couch 336 00:16:04,406 --> 00:16:05,721 more comfortable than my bed? 337 00:16:05,881 --> 00:16:08,416 Well, you're welcome to it whenever you want. 338 00:16:09,781 --> 00:16:13,650 Thank you for the friendship reboot. 339 00:16:14,150 --> 00:16:16,944 It almost made up for the last time that I woke up here. 340 00:16:17,029 --> 00:16:18,519 Tried to rip the Band‐Aid off too soon. 341 00:16:18,603 --> 00:16:19,812 It's behind us. We're good. 342 00:16:20,122 --> 00:16:21,775 Uh, but you can take the pizza with you. 343 00:16:21,864 --> 00:16:23,229 I'll grab it for you. 344 00:16:24,925 --> 00:16:26,343 Wait. 345 00:16:28,959 --> 00:16:30,251 Mnh, mnh, mnh. 346 00:16:30,336 --> 00:16:32,041 I'm ripping off the Band‐Aid. 347 00:16:44,773 --> 00:16:48,111 It's just a basic algorithm that simulates the spread of COVID. 348 00:16:48,196 --> 00:16:51,860 Here's what it would look like if everyone social‐distanced. 349 00:16:54,752 --> 00:16:58,891 Here... if everyone wore face masks. 350 00:17:00,381 --> 00:17:02,703 It's just a little stochastic S‐I‐R model 351 00:17:02,788 --> 00:17:05,219 that allows for multivariable inputs... 352 00:17:05,345 --> 00:17:09,156 w‐which I built by converting a "Zombie Apocalypse" game. 353 00:17:09,241 --> 00:17:11,538 I love that game! How does yours end? 354 00:17:11,623 --> 00:17:12,791 I‐I don't know yet. 355 00:17:12,876 --> 00:17:15,055 Same. I never got past level eight, so... 356 00:17:15,140 --> 00:17:16,683 Yeah, Helm, I appreciate your interest, 357 00:17:16,768 --> 00:17:18,353 but, uh, no one's gonna know my test is negative 358 00:17:18,437 --> 00:17:20,021 if it never leaves my porch, hmm? 359 00:17:20,106 --> 00:17:21,816 Show's over. 360 00:17:22,259 --> 00:17:23,656 Bye‐ee! 361 00:17:27,916 --> 00:17:30,073 I was devastated when you died. 362 00:17:30,158 --> 00:17:32,963 You were all cracking up at my funeral. 363 00:17:35,306 --> 00:17:36,783 Well, we were... 364 00:17:36,898 --> 00:17:37,898 No. What? 365 00:17:38,186 --> 00:17:40,237 What? No. 366 00:17:40,322 --> 00:17:43,143 It... That made me happy. 367 00:17:46,075 --> 00:17:47,869 I was devastated. 368 00:17:48,238 --> 00:17:51,338 And then I was okay. 369 00:17:52,722 --> 00:17:54,362 And even with Derek... 370 00:17:54,523 --> 00:17:57,916 eventually you go on. 371 00:17:58,585 --> 00:18:00,979 And the kids would go on. 372 00:18:01,619 --> 00:18:03,713 They would, but... 373 00:18:03,891 --> 00:18:07,229 I think maybe with them it's different. 374 00:18:07,604 --> 00:18:09,189 My mom didn't go on. 375 00:18:09,274 --> 00:18:10,608 No? 376 00:18:10,693 --> 00:18:13,198 Not really, not like she used to. 377 00:18:14,064 --> 00:18:16,385 Some grief is... 378 00:18:16,803 --> 00:18:19,734 is heavier than other grief. 379 00:18:19,819 --> 00:18:21,307 Sometimes it moves through you, 380 00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:24,612 and sometimes it... it just gets stuck. 381 00:18:24,952 --> 00:18:27,815 And you carry it. Like my mom. 382 00:18:28,273 --> 00:18:30,108 My mom carries it. 383 00:18:31,746 --> 00:18:34,752 Sometimes I try to shake it out of her. 384 00:18:35,730 --> 00:18:37,648 What?! 385 00:18:37,764 --> 00:18:39,181 Like, you know... 386 00:18:39,266 --> 00:18:40,809 Like you haunt her? 387 00:18:40,894 --> 00:18:42,734 Well, I mean, if you want to call it that, I... 388 00:18:45,197 --> 00:18:48,866 I just want her to... let it go. 389 00:18:49,176 --> 00:18:50,596 I want her to know I'm still me 390 00:18:50,681 --> 00:18:53,924 even though she can't touch me and she can't see me, 391 00:18:54,009 --> 00:18:55,916 but I am still me. 392 00:18:57,002 --> 00:18:58,057 It's not the same. 393 00:18:58,150 --> 00:18:59,377 No, I know. 394 00:19:09,812 --> 00:19:11,146 You know, her sats were steady, 395 00:19:11,231 --> 00:19:12,524 but now they're just getting worse. 396 00:19:12,608 --> 00:19:14,417 I made some calls, and there's another spot open 397 00:19:14,501 --> 00:19:16,753 in Dr. Kuo's trial, but we have to act fast. 398 00:19:16,838 --> 00:19:19,883 Is there another spot because another patient died? 399 00:19:23,615 --> 00:19:25,830 Have you seen the opacities in her lungs? 400 00:19:25,953 --> 00:19:27,329 Dr. Webber, at this point, 401 00:19:27,422 --> 00:19:28,980 you can either hope that she wakes up again 402 00:19:29,064 --> 00:19:32,244 or you can make the decisions that she chose you to make! 403 00:19:32,497 --> 00:19:34,165 I beg your pardon? 404 00:19:34,295 --> 00:19:38,007 The choice is between doing nothing and doing something. 405 00:19:40,553 --> 00:19:42,221 Do something. 406 00:19:51,970 --> 00:19:53,331 - You had to leave him open? - Yes. 407 00:19:53,415 --> 00:19:55,502 Once we got in, his colon was a mess. 408 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,534 So we had to bring up an ileostomy 409 00:19:57,619 --> 00:19:59,120 and place an ABTHERA for the swelling. 410 00:19:59,205 --> 00:20:01,355 His clavicle's non‐displaced. 411 00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:02,792 Fracture should heal quite nicely. 412 00:20:02,877 --> 00:20:04,557 - How soon? - Till he can work again? 413 00:20:04,642 --> 00:20:05,767 Maybe a month. 414 00:20:05,852 --> 00:20:07,307 Tseng, let's diurese him overnight 415 00:20:07,392 --> 00:20:09,103 and let's put him on the stand‐by list for the OR 416 00:20:09,187 --> 00:20:11,276 in case we need to do a washout tomorrow. 417 00:20:11,490 --> 00:20:13,033 You did well today. 418 00:20:17,491 --> 00:20:18,690 Can I ask you something? 419 00:20:18,775 --> 00:20:20,818 Am I literally the only person that can answer it? 420 00:20:21,247 --> 00:20:22,479 Kind of. 421 00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:25,533 Our patient's Asian‐American. 422 00:20:26,419 --> 00:20:29,151 So right‐side diverticulitis was a greater possibility. 423 00:20:29,236 --> 00:20:31,768 But Dr. Hunt didn't scan him when he first came in. 424 00:20:32,123 --> 00:20:33,666 So, what's your question? 425 00:20:33,751 --> 00:20:36,463 I think he should know so he doesn't make this mistake again. 426 00:20:36,564 --> 00:20:38,120 But I don't know how to talk to him about it. 427 00:20:38,204 --> 00:20:40,206 You don't know how to accuse your attending of being a racist? 428 00:20:40,290 --> 00:20:42,612 - That's not what I meant. - Well, that's what he's gonna hear. 429 00:20:42,696 --> 00:20:45,737 So your advice is... do nothing? 430 00:20:47,881 --> 00:20:50,167 You're a resident. He's an attending. 431 00:20:50,252 --> 00:20:52,347 My advice to you is, if you're gonna have a conversation 432 00:20:52,431 --> 00:20:54,463 with him, at least know what to expect. 433 00:21:02,058 --> 00:21:04,002 Hello! Dr. Koracick? 434 00:21:11,567 --> 00:21:13,449 - No test kit? - They wouldn't give me another one 435 00:21:13,533 --> 00:21:14,826 because you keep testing positive. 436 00:21:14,910 --> 00:21:17,705 But I got to level nine on "Zombie Apocalypse." 437 00:21:17,790 --> 00:21:19,612 I didn't stop the virus, but it's a start. 438 00:21:19,879 --> 00:21:21,221 Oh, yeah, I‐I stopped that. 439 00:21:21,306 --> 00:21:23,516 You found a cure? Or a vaccine? 440 00:21:23,601 --> 00:21:27,557 Wait. Did you reach herd immunity? 441 00:21:27,844 --> 00:21:29,518 Tell me. 442 00:21:29,866 --> 00:21:31,075 I blew up the world. 443 00:21:31,229 --> 00:21:32,355 You killed everyone? 444 00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:34,233 Oh, we're all gonna die anyway. 445 00:21:34,318 --> 00:21:35,924 Well, yeah, eventually. 446 00:21:36,009 --> 00:21:38,520 Well, if by "eventually" you mean before the year's out, then, yeah. 447 00:21:38,604 --> 00:21:40,807 I figured I'd cut to the chase. 448 00:21:47,845 --> 00:21:50,635 That was not a bridge. 449 00:21:50,720 --> 00:21:54,385 That was... What's bigger than a bridge? 450 00:21:54,536 --> 00:21:56,393 Mm, whatever that was, I guess. 451 00:21:57,036 --> 00:21:58,698 Okay. But we can't do it again. 452 00:21:58,955 --> 00:22:01,300 - No? - No. Definitely not. 453 00:22:01,385 --> 00:22:02,816 Because then... then we're a thing. 454 00:22:02,901 --> 00:22:03,934 We're definitely not a thing. 455 00:22:04,018 --> 00:22:05,130 Yeah, definitely not a thing. 456 00:22:05,214 --> 00:22:06,073 - Agreed. - Not a thing. 457 00:22:06,158 --> 00:22:08,307 - It's just... However... - Yeah? 458 00:22:08,392 --> 00:22:11,228 If we were to not get dressed 459 00:22:11,313 --> 00:22:14,232 between the first and the... goes after... 460 00:22:14,317 --> 00:22:16,777 - Yep. Yeah, mm‐hmm. - You know what I'm saying? 461 00:22:16,885 --> 00:22:18,394 Then it's all really just one experience. 462 00:22:18,478 --> 00:22:19,637 It's just one experience. 463 00:22:19,737 --> 00:22:22,257 - So it's not a thing. It's just... - It's one whole experience. 464 00:22:25,247 --> 00:22:27,916 So... he just bailed? 465 00:22:28,101 --> 00:22:30,937 Yeah. I knew that he had problems with his dad, 466 00:22:31,022 --> 00:22:33,374 but I did not know they were that bad. 467 00:22:33,459 --> 00:22:34,961 Couldn't even be in a virtual room with him. 468 00:22:35,045 --> 00:22:36,515 And I haven't heard from him since. 469 00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:38,749 You seem exceedingly calm about that. 470 00:22:38,834 --> 00:22:40,918 You know, I'm... I'm paying it forward. 471 00:22:41,003 --> 00:22:42,671 Or... backward. 472 00:22:42,756 --> 00:22:44,640 When we first reconnected in L. A., 473 00:22:44,725 --> 00:22:48,311 I told him that I needed some time, and he totally heard me. 474 00:22:48,554 --> 00:22:52,226 Plus, our sister's in the hospital with COVID alone. 475 00:22:52,886 --> 00:22:55,097 It really puts things in perspective. 476 00:22:57,389 --> 00:22:58,976 I hate that we can't be with her. 477 00:22:59,367 --> 00:23:00,618 Me too. 478 00:23:05,108 --> 00:23:06,710 Is that whistling? 479 00:23:07,002 --> 00:23:08,587 That's Link. 480 00:23:08,672 --> 00:23:11,984 He is a one‐man pep rally. 481 00:23:12,083 --> 00:23:13,668 And I hate that, too. 482 00:23:16,691 --> 00:23:18,827 Oh! Dr. Altman. 483 00:23:19,380 --> 00:23:20,554 Bad time? 484 00:23:20,639 --> 00:23:23,320 This virus is like a‐a drunk uncle at a wedding. 485 00:23:23,405 --> 00:23:25,024 Y‐You've got no idea what it's gonna do 486 00:23:25,109 --> 00:23:26,077 or when it's gonna turn on you. 487 00:23:26,162 --> 00:23:27,913 I am reading everything on COVID 488 00:23:27,998 --> 00:23:30,125 because every 24 hours there's something new. 489 00:23:30,210 --> 00:23:32,118 And I have to keep up because there could be one drug, 490 00:23:32,202 --> 00:23:33,663 one procedure... it could help. 491 00:23:33,748 --> 00:23:35,227 It could help everyone. It could help Meredith Grey. 492 00:23:35,311 --> 00:23:37,577 So, yes, it's a... it's a... it's a bad time. 493 00:23:40,436 --> 00:23:41,395 What do you need? 494 00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:42,788 Um, I was gonna tell you 495 00:23:42,873 --> 00:23:45,875 that Dr. Koracick is in a really dark place 496 00:23:45,960 --> 00:23:47,878 and seems like he could use a friend. 497 00:23:48,014 --> 00:23:51,859 But, um, Dr. Grey is kinda my whole world, so... 498 00:23:52,245 --> 00:23:54,163 Never mind. Proceed. 499 00:23:58,812 --> 00:24:00,851 Dave's abdominal swelling is coming down, 500 00:24:00,936 --> 00:24:03,593 so we should be able to close him in just a few days. 501 00:24:03,678 --> 00:24:05,593 Oh, that's great news. Thank you. 502 00:24:05,678 --> 00:24:07,809 Yeah. Just doing my job. How are things there? 503 00:24:07,894 --> 00:24:09,706 Oh, hanging on by a thread. 504 00:24:09,791 --> 00:24:11,395 Dave's the one who keeps this place running. 505 00:24:11,479 --> 00:24:12,988 Well, we are doing everything we can here 506 00:24:13,072 --> 00:24:13,955 to get him back to you, okay? 507 00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:15,165 Can I see him one more time? 508 00:24:15,250 --> 00:24:16,244 Of course. 509 00:24:16,329 --> 00:24:17,913 Rest up and come home soon, okay? 510 00:24:17,998 --> 00:24:20,158 I wish I could be there. I love you. 511 00:24:21,971 --> 00:24:23,901 It's awful that she can't visit. 512 00:24:23,986 --> 00:24:25,791 It's awful this happened in the first place. 513 00:24:27,531 --> 00:24:29,182 Tseng, you need to step out. 514 00:24:31,573 --> 00:24:33,283 Now. 515 00:24:40,244 --> 00:24:41,644 You don't have to be so hard on her. 516 00:24:41,728 --> 00:24:43,438 She's very attached to this patient. 517 00:24:43,523 --> 00:24:45,024 She's upset that a misdiagnosis 518 00:24:45,109 --> 00:24:47,527 cost this patient the next four weeks of his livelihood. 519 00:24:47,612 --> 00:24:49,907 Me too. Sometimes you have to weigh the risks and make a decision. 520 00:24:49,991 --> 00:24:52,201 Right‐sided diverticulitis is extremely rare. 521 00:24:52,286 --> 00:24:54,579 But not as rare for Dave. It's 10 times more likely 522 00:24:54,719 --> 00:24:56,760 in patients of Asian descent than white patients. 523 00:24:56,845 --> 00:24:59,595 Which you clearly didn't know or didn't take into consideration. 524 00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:00,916 But either way it's on you, 525 00:25:01,001 --> 00:25:03,533 'cause all this could've been avoided with a simple scan. 526 00:25:16,291 --> 00:25:18,126 You're just getting here? 527 00:25:18,234 --> 00:25:20,193 Is that a problem? 528 00:25:20,386 --> 00:25:22,893 No. Just didn't see you when I got up. 529 00:25:22,978 --> 00:25:24,730 I figured you came in early. 530 00:25:24,815 --> 00:25:26,900 I was exercising. 531 00:25:28,507 --> 00:25:29,783 Morning. 532 00:25:30,787 --> 00:25:33,190 Oh, my God! You're back together. 533 00:25:33,275 --> 00:25:34,580 - Kind of. - Ugh! 534 00:25:34,665 --> 00:25:36,460 Taryn said the Netherlands 535 00:25:36,545 --> 00:25:39,404 suggested people find a designated sex partner 536 00:25:39,489 --> 00:25:40,549 for the pandemic. 537 00:25:40,634 --> 00:25:42,143 You're having sex with Nico 538 00:25:42,228 --> 00:25:44,230 because the Dutch government recommends it? 539 00:25:44,315 --> 00:25:46,984 Their country ranks very high on the World Happiness Index. 540 00:25:47,130 --> 00:25:49,002 He lied, dumped you. 541 00:25:49,087 --> 00:25:51,208 - He barely gives you the time of day. - Okay, stop judging. 542 00:25:51,292 --> 00:25:53,229 It's wartime, but I still have needs. 543 00:25:53,314 --> 00:25:55,899 It's not like I'm just gonna find someone new. 544 00:25:56,094 --> 00:25:58,158 So you're with your emotionally unavailable ex? 545 00:25:58,243 --> 00:25:59,690 Wartime! 546 00:26:00,902 --> 00:26:05,080 Ah, the sun is out, and Scout's down. 547 00:26:05,165 --> 00:26:10,307 And everyone else is watching a PBS show about penguins. 548 00:26:10,446 --> 00:26:13,532 Meredith's not improving. Uh, they can't wake her. 549 00:26:13,617 --> 00:26:15,526 Well, she's getting her rest. It's good. 550 00:26:15,611 --> 00:26:18,127 No, it is not good. None of this is good, okay? 551 00:26:18,212 --> 00:26:20,381 Do you not see that? I am terrified for Meredith. 552 00:26:20,466 --> 00:26:23,924 I am sad. I am enraged that this is happening. 553 00:26:24,009 --> 00:26:26,385 So, please, stop dismissing me 554 00:26:26,470 --> 00:26:29,048 with your bright sides and your pep talks, okay? 555 00:26:29,159 --> 00:26:31,744 Let me have my fear and my grief 556 00:26:32,127 --> 00:26:33,291 and my anger. 557 00:26:33,376 --> 00:26:37,421 Because if I don't, if I keep shoving it down, 558 00:26:37,545 --> 00:26:39,854 you will have a very hard time 559 00:26:40,274 --> 00:26:42,385 finding the bright side to the consequences. 560 00:26:59,703 --> 00:27:01,037 What are you doing? 561 00:27:05,586 --> 00:27:09,004 I'm making some space for us to sit 562 00:27:09,089 --> 00:27:13,509 while you have all your feelings. 563 00:27:28,501 --> 00:27:32,213 ♪ How do we still remember ♪ 564 00:27:34,695 --> 00:27:38,629 ♪ My mind and memories young ♪ 565 00:27:41,053 --> 00:27:44,942 ♪ I want you January to December ♪ 566 00:27:47,330 --> 00:27:49,082 - Do you still dance? - ♪ Another trip around the sun ♪ 567 00:27:49,166 --> 00:27:50,250 Hmm? 568 00:27:50,419 --> 00:27:51,785 When you're sad or you're stressed, 569 00:27:51,870 --> 00:27:54,942 do you still... dance it out? 570 00:27:55,027 --> 00:27:59,902 No, not so much anymore, not since Cristina left. 571 00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:02,944 Cristina didn't die. 572 00:28:03,068 --> 00:28:04,527 I know. 573 00:28:05,909 --> 00:28:08,988 That's what I miss about being alive. 574 00:28:09,556 --> 00:28:13,225 Dancing till you drop. 575 00:28:13,488 --> 00:28:16,488 Laughing till you cry. 576 00:28:16,688 --> 00:28:19,363 Food. Textures. 577 00:28:19,516 --> 00:28:22,504 The crunch of cereal as you eat it from the box. 578 00:28:24,117 --> 00:28:26,746 The feel of clean sheets and a good pillow 579 00:28:26,831 --> 00:28:28,504 at the end of a long day. 580 00:28:30,459 --> 00:28:32,848 ♪ These fears ♪ 581 00:28:32,948 --> 00:28:36,034 've got the consent forms for that clinical trial... 582 00:28:36,229 --> 00:28:37,512 for that clinical trial... 583 00:28:37,597 --> 00:28:40,394 ♪ These tears are just tears ♪ 584 00:28:40,479 --> 00:28:43,746 And there's one more space, and... 585 00:28:44,134 --> 00:28:46,457 I have to decide, and... 586 00:28:46,546 --> 00:28:50,257 it could be the best or worst decision of my life. 587 00:28:50,763 --> 00:28:54,176 Your doctors, your friends, your family. 588 00:28:54,261 --> 00:28:55,846 They're worried about you. 589 00:28:56,128 --> 00:28:57,707 I'm trying to be strong for them, 590 00:28:57,792 --> 00:29:01,379 but I'll admit... I'm struggling. 591 00:29:02,426 --> 00:29:04,285 Seeing you there like this... 592 00:29:04,655 --> 00:29:07,121 and not knowing what to do. 593 00:29:09,305 --> 00:29:11,957 I'm sorry, Richard. 594 00:29:12,398 --> 00:29:15,543 And choices. Ahh. 595 00:29:15,705 --> 00:29:17,664 So many choices. 596 00:29:17,748 --> 00:29:20,965 So many ways to live a life. 597 00:29:21,169 --> 00:29:22,461 Meredith? 598 00:29:22,545 --> 00:29:25,308 Meredith, what is it? I'm here. 599 00:29:25,393 --> 00:29:27,102 I'm right here. 600 00:29:27,187 --> 00:29:31,441 ♪ Enough time to know that you're... ♪ 601 00:29:31,526 --> 00:29:34,145 If you stay here, it might break him. 602 00:29:34,230 --> 00:29:38,325 ♪ Ohh, keeping your eyes on me ♪ 603 00:29:38,410 --> 00:29:39,652 I know. 604 00:29:39,956 --> 00:29:43,001 ♪ I know you'll be here when I look 'round ♪ 605 00:29:44,567 --> 00:29:46,418 I know, George. 606 00:29:46,986 --> 00:29:50,781 ♪ These fears ♪ 607 00:29:50,866 --> 00:29:53,865 ♪ No longer weapons ♪ 608 00:29:53,950 --> 00:30:00,230 ♪ These tears are just tears ♪ 609 00:30:00,390 --> 00:30:02,642 ♪ Not longing ♪ 610 00:30:02,727 --> 00:30:03,752 Get her in. 611 00:30:03,836 --> 00:30:06,433 ♪ For direction ♪ 612 00:30:06,641 --> 00:30:12,387 ♪ I belong here ♪ 613 00:30:19,231 --> 00:30:22,019 Oh, God, I hate... 614 00:30:23,610 --> 00:30:24,736 Me? 615 00:30:24,827 --> 00:30:26,704 Every single thing except you. 616 00:30:33,310 --> 00:30:35,191 I live with Jo Wilson now. 617 00:30:35,330 --> 00:30:36,910 But she, uh... 618 00:30:37,303 --> 00:30:40,300 has not been sleeping at home. 619 00:30:41,176 --> 00:30:42,920 I want to invite you over. 620 00:30:43,005 --> 00:30:48,122 But I guess we have not been great to each other. 621 00:30:48,207 --> 00:30:51,715 And I don't know what's really changed. 622 00:30:52,464 --> 00:30:54,090 Levi. 623 00:30:54,891 --> 00:30:57,605 There's a worldwide pandemic. 624 00:30:57,981 --> 00:31:01,025 We literally don't know if we're gonna live to see tomorrow. 625 00:31:01,110 --> 00:31:02,988 A lot has changed. 626 00:31:08,186 --> 00:31:09,980 Yeah, okay, let's go. 627 00:31:21,293 --> 00:31:22,877 - Hey. - Hey. 628 00:31:23,090 --> 00:31:24,254 Um... 629 00:31:24,433 --> 00:31:26,888 Our plan went to crap, 630 00:31:26,973 --> 00:31:28,496 and now we can't pretend 631 00:31:28,581 --> 00:31:30,326 - it didn't happen... - I can't be in a relationship right now. 632 00:31:30,410 --> 00:31:32,113 - What? - Sorry. 633 00:31:32,245 --> 00:31:34,179 Let me start over. That sounded rude. 634 00:31:34,264 --> 00:31:38,142 When I'm saying is, I‐I jumped right into something with Vic... 635 00:31:38,226 --> 00:31:40,186 Mm‐hmm. you know, after breaking up with Maggie, 636 00:31:40,270 --> 00:31:43,606 who I started dating pretty soon after April. 637 00:31:43,690 --> 00:31:47,026 So I just probably should take some time to sort things out. 638 00:31:47,110 --> 00:31:51,027 I don't want to do anything to hurt you or our friendship. 639 00:31:51,699 --> 00:31:57,370 Jackson, my husband left me the same year that we got married, 640 00:31:57,454 --> 00:31:59,090 for a second time. 641 00:31:59,195 --> 00:32:00,613 I am super broken. 642 00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:03,817 Like "virtual therapy three times a week" broken. 643 00:32:03,902 --> 00:32:06,130 And now I have to put myself back together 644 00:32:06,215 --> 00:32:08,423 in a world that I no longer recognize, 645 00:32:08,507 --> 00:32:11,843 one that is sad and lonely and depressing. 646 00:32:11,927 --> 00:32:16,082 So what I need is friendship and sex. 647 00:32:16,167 --> 00:32:21,708 I am not, like really not, looking for a relationship. 648 00:32:21,793 --> 00:32:23,746 Especially with someone like you. 649 00:32:23,869 --> 00:32:26,273 - Someone like me? Okay. - Mm‐hmm. 650 00:32:26,358 --> 00:32:28,942 Yeah, you know, Mr., um, Can't Be Alone 651 00:32:29,027 --> 00:32:31,988 But Sometimes Skips Town To Go On Nature Journeys. 652 00:32:32,072 --> 00:32:33,856 - No thanks. - No. Oh, okay. 653 00:32:33,941 --> 00:32:36,527 But you can be friends with and have sex with 654 00:32:36,613 --> 00:32:37,755 Mr. Can't Be Alone? 655 00:32:37,840 --> 00:32:39,301 - Got it. - Yes. 656 00:32:39,496 --> 00:32:42,433 The Netherlands has recommended 657 00:32:42,541 --> 00:32:46,377 that its residents find a regular sex buddy 658 00:32:46,461 --> 00:32:49,098 during the pandemic for safety. 659 00:32:49,214 --> 00:32:50,879 - Sounds wise. - Doesn't it? 660 00:32:52,401 --> 00:32:54,629 You thought I wanted to date you?! 661 00:32:54,850 --> 00:32:57,262 Well, how is that... Why is that so funny? 662 00:33:04,649 --> 00:33:05,900 Hey. Uh... 663 00:33:06,527 --> 00:33:08,801 You mind if I, uh... 664 00:33:09,244 --> 00:33:11,746 Okay, well, sit over there. 665 00:33:18,274 --> 00:33:20,113 Okay. Hypothetical. 666 00:33:20,379 --> 00:33:23,080 Asian‐American male presents with fever, 667 00:33:23,188 --> 00:33:26,277 high white blood cell count, and right lower quadrant pain. 668 00:33:26,457 --> 00:33:28,211 Oh, is this the restaurant guy? 669 00:33:28,295 --> 00:33:29,671 I caught him in the ER. 670 00:33:29,755 --> 00:33:32,215 Bailey, I see a dozen presentations like that a month. 671 00:33:32,348 --> 00:33:33,883 All appendicitis. 672 00:33:33,967 --> 00:33:36,372 But if I'm honest, in that moment, 673 00:33:36,457 --> 00:33:37,845 I‐I didn't give it much thought. 674 00:33:37,929 --> 00:33:40,515 I just... He was... he was any patient. 675 00:33:40,683 --> 00:33:42,741 Any non‐Asian patient. 676 00:33:42,893 --> 00:33:44,852 I defaulted to a standard of care. 677 00:33:44,936 --> 00:33:47,452 That's centered around white patients. 678 00:33:50,539 --> 00:33:53,342 I never want to make that mistake again. 679 00:33:53,427 --> 00:33:55,507 There is no excuse. 680 00:33:55,592 --> 00:33:57,226 You know, when you're dealing with a high patient count, 681 00:33:57,310 --> 00:33:59,687 you have to make judgment calls, you know? 682 00:33:59,772 --> 00:34:02,900 You... You have to ask, what is the most likely problem, right? 683 00:34:03,038 --> 00:34:04,655 So there's no excuses, 684 00:34:04,740 --> 00:34:06,658 other than the excuses you just listed off? 685 00:34:07,366 --> 00:34:09,124 - That's not what I meant. - Ha! 686 00:34:09,231 --> 00:34:12,025 I just want to treat everyone equally. 687 00:34:12,187 --> 00:34:15,590 Equal doesn't work for everybody, Hunt. 688 00:34:15,675 --> 00:34:18,886 I‐It's about equity... patients getting what they need, 689 00:34:18,970 --> 00:34:21,335 whether it fits into a protocol or not. 690 00:34:21,538 --> 00:34:24,960 Look, I just put my parents in assisted living, 691 00:34:25,045 --> 00:34:29,093 and I can't stop worrying that they won't get enough care 692 00:34:29,178 --> 00:34:32,999 because... there are so few Black folks there. 693 00:34:33,151 --> 00:34:35,653 Meanwhile, my dad's freaked out 694 00:34:35,737 --> 00:34:38,990 because on his floor the nurses are male. 695 00:34:39,074 --> 00:34:42,436 In his mind, good nurses are female, period. 696 00:34:42,521 --> 00:34:46,561 So we all have biases, Hunt, including you. 697 00:34:46,782 --> 00:34:49,909 What matters now is what you do about it. 698 00:34:50,001 --> 00:34:51,506 You're the chief of trauma. 699 00:34:51,670 --> 00:34:53,421 If the protocols don't work, 700 00:34:53,505 --> 00:34:56,225 then read, learn... 701 00:34:57,024 --> 00:34:59,943 question... and change them. 702 00:35:09,599 --> 00:35:11,100 Kids are asleep. 703 00:35:18,613 --> 00:35:22,913 And... it's your turn to talk. 704 00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:24,286 I'm good. 705 00:35:26,832 --> 00:35:29,436 Link, everything sucks right now. You can talk about it. 706 00:35:30,026 --> 00:35:31,631 Yeah. Yeah. I could do that. 707 00:35:31,733 --> 00:35:34,694 If you want me to be... miserable and resentful. 708 00:35:35,297 --> 00:35:37,186 Resentful of me? 709 00:35:37,382 --> 00:35:39,133 For trying to listen? 710 00:35:39,217 --> 00:35:40,676 No, of making me talk 711 00:35:40,760 --> 00:35:44,491 when clearly all I want to do is play my damn guitar. 712 00:35:45,764 --> 00:35:47,264 You can't keep everything bottled up. 713 00:35:47,349 --> 00:35:48,945 No, no, you can't, Amelia. 714 00:35:49,030 --> 00:35:50,520 That's how you process feelings. 715 00:35:50,604 --> 00:35:52,855 That's how you cope. And I'm okay with that. 716 00:35:52,939 --> 00:35:57,531 But... I've been through "everything sucks." 717 00:35:57,616 --> 00:36:00,639 Illness and isolation. 718 00:36:00,770 --> 00:36:03,187 When I had cancer. When... when my parents split. 719 00:36:03,272 --> 00:36:04,992 I was so depressed that I could... 720 00:36:05,076 --> 00:36:07,406 I could barely get out of bed for the better part of a year. 721 00:36:07,490 --> 00:36:09,335 And I was 11. 722 00:36:10,735 --> 00:36:13,029 Then I met a kid at cancer camp. 723 00:36:13,413 --> 00:36:15,128 Morrow Willis. 724 00:36:15,212 --> 00:36:16,678 Kid was probably sicker than I was, 725 00:36:16,763 --> 00:36:19,056 but he didn't want to talk about treatments or symptoms. 726 00:36:19,141 --> 00:36:21,643 Just sports and "Mario Kart." 727 00:36:21,749 --> 00:36:25,961 So I said to myself, "What if I just focus on the good stuff?" 728 00:36:26,139 --> 00:36:27,467 And I tried it. 729 00:36:27,552 --> 00:36:31,430 And it turns out that's what works for me. 730 00:36:31,796 --> 00:36:33,147 That's what I need. 731 00:36:33,772 --> 00:36:35,523 And if you're okay with that, great, 732 00:36:35,607 --> 00:36:38,413 but if you need a partner in misery, I'm not your guy. 733 00:36:46,584 --> 00:36:48,178 Whatcha playing? 734 00:36:49,114 --> 00:36:50,992 Just a little something I made up. 735 00:36:51,077 --> 00:36:54,708 It's called, uh, "If the Virus Doesn't End Us, 736 00:36:54,793 --> 00:36:57,335 Then Climate Change Probably Will Blues." 737 00:37:09,905 --> 00:37:11,178 Hey. 738 00:37:11,623 --> 00:37:13,881 Hey. Wasn't sure you'd answer. 739 00:37:13,966 --> 00:37:16,515 Please. The woman who all but ghosted you for a month 740 00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:18,163 does not get to judge. 741 00:37:18,967 --> 00:37:21,860 It's just, uh... my dad. 742 00:37:21,945 --> 00:37:23,374 We don't have to talk about it 743 00:37:23,459 --> 00:37:26,428 if you're not ready to or if you don't want to. 744 00:37:26,629 --> 00:37:30,311 It makes me crazy because he... he seems like he's all charm, 745 00:37:30,716 --> 00:37:33,053 but he has got this temper that... 746 00:37:34,397 --> 00:37:38,002 well, if you're serious about not talking about it right now, 747 00:37:38,279 --> 00:37:39,521 that can wait... 748 00:37:39,754 --> 00:37:42,421 because the things I want to do with you tonight... 749 00:37:42,997 --> 00:37:44,241 they can't. 750 00:37:44,709 --> 00:37:48,637 Oh, well, I'm going to need you to say more about that. 751 00:37:48,722 --> 00:37:49,972 Alright, alright. Hold on. Let me, uh... 752 00:37:50,056 --> 00:37:51,195 Let me try to share my screen. 753 00:37:51,279 --> 00:37:53,788 Oh, my God. What? 754 00:37:55,179 --> 00:37:57,085 Are we gonna watch porn? 755 00:37:57,342 --> 00:37:58,606 No. 756 00:37:58,908 --> 00:38:00,701 "Coming to America." 757 00:38:02,005 --> 00:38:03,276 Mm‐hmm. 758 00:38:03,361 --> 00:38:06,405 Yes! Please! Ahh! 759 00:38:06,960 --> 00:38:08,449 Ugh! 760 00:38:08,556 --> 00:38:09,928 Okay. 761 00:38:12,454 --> 00:38:13,772 Hey, Tom?! 762 00:38:15,046 --> 00:38:16,499 Tom, it's me! 763 00:38:20,219 --> 00:38:23,388 I brought you soup and I know that you're home! 764 00:38:23,473 --> 00:38:26,935 It's that really excellent soup from that little Polish place. 765 00:38:30,245 --> 00:38:31,842 Tom... 766 00:38:32,689 --> 00:38:35,619 I know... I know that I am the last person 767 00:38:35,704 --> 00:38:37,812 that you want to see. I just... I don't know. 768 00:38:37,896 --> 00:38:39,897 I thought maybe we could talk through the door. 769 00:38:39,982 --> 00:38:44,861 I just feel like you need some semblance of human contact. 770 00:38:45,249 --> 00:38:48,781 I don't blame you for... for wanting to keep your distance, 771 00:38:48,865 --> 00:38:50,639 I mean, pandemic or not. 772 00:38:57,298 --> 00:38:59,491 I just want you to know that you're not alone. 773 00:39:12,172 --> 00:39:14,569 Experts say the more resilient we are, 774 00:39:14,737 --> 00:39:16,988 the better we can face life's challenges. 775 00:39:18,472 --> 00:39:22,139 ♪ I'm okay alone ♪ 776 00:39:24,332 --> 00:39:26,984 ♪ It makes my soul stir ♪ 777 00:39:27,069 --> 00:39:29,030 I was so mad at you. 778 00:39:29,114 --> 00:39:30,928 What, for leaving you? 779 00:39:31,477 --> 00:39:33,854 For choosing someone over yourself. 780 00:39:34,119 --> 00:39:36,245 I didn't know I was gonna die. 781 00:39:36,874 --> 00:39:38,217 Do you regret it? 782 00:39:38,456 --> 00:39:41,208 ♪ Keep my head in the dirt ♪ 783 00:39:41,292 --> 00:39:42,905 Does that matter? 784 00:39:43,753 --> 00:39:46,233 You'd have done the same thing. Isn't that why you're here? 785 00:39:46,381 --> 00:39:48,049 ♪ Slow crash ♪ 786 00:39:48,133 --> 00:39:51,010 ♪ Stumble over nothing on my own path ♪ Yeah. I guess. 787 00:39:51,141 --> 00:39:52,546 So it's your fault. 788 00:39:54,315 --> 00:39:55,967 How do you figure? 789 00:39:56,096 --> 00:39:58,414 ♪ No one ever wanted me to go back ♪ 790 00:39:58,499 --> 00:40:00,452 Because you... 791 00:40:00,720 --> 00:40:03,624 went all‐in for everybody. 792 00:40:03,731 --> 00:40:07,567 Your friends, your family, a woman at the bus stop. 793 00:40:07,815 --> 00:40:09,812 You think that didn't somehow affect me? 794 00:40:09,897 --> 00:40:11,364 ♪ But I refuse ♪ 795 00:40:11,577 --> 00:40:13,936 You changed my life, George. 796 00:40:14,420 --> 00:40:16,796 I didn't say it then, but it's true. 797 00:40:16,881 --> 00:40:19,717 And the single biggest factor for cultivating resilience? 798 00:40:19,802 --> 00:40:22,387 ♪ Far away from home ♪ 799 00:40:22,625 --> 00:40:24,436 Positive relationships. 800 00:40:24,984 --> 00:40:29,108 ♪ Forgot my address ♪ 801 00:40:32,719 --> 00:40:36,639 ♪ Mind is still on loan ♪ 802 00:40:36,723 --> 00:40:40,142 For what it's worth, I think you made the right call, 803 00:40:40,226 --> 00:40:42,499 putting her in the trial. 804 00:40:42,811 --> 00:40:45,975 I've known Meredith since she was a child. 805 00:40:47,043 --> 00:40:51,922 I watched her operate on her dolls in the OR gallery. 806 00:40:52,007 --> 00:40:55,866 I took her for milk and cookies in the cafeteria. 807 00:40:56,489 --> 00:40:59,741 I helped her get over her fear of the film review room 808 00:40:59,829 --> 00:41:02,405 because that's where she thought we kept the skeletons. 809 00:41:02,499 --> 00:41:05,319 ♪ I know I am anything but uncouth ♪ 810 00:41:05,404 --> 00:41:09,764 And then I watched her become a surgeon, a wife... 811 00:41:10,561 --> 00:41:14,421 a mother, and a chief. 812 00:41:16,721 --> 00:41:21,413 You know, I knew COVID patients had to suffer in isolation. 813 00:41:21,559 --> 00:41:25,327 But I never gave any thought to how helpless 814 00:41:25,522 --> 00:41:28,851 and alone it feels 815 00:41:28,936 --> 00:41:30,866 for the people who care about them. 816 00:41:33,194 --> 00:41:39,358 ♪ I ref‐u‐u‐use ♪ 817 00:41:41,111 --> 00:41:47,460 ♪ Yes, I ref‐u‐u‐use ♪ 818 00:41:47,634 --> 00:41:53,139 ♪ No, no, no, no, no ♪ 819 00:41:53,383 --> 00:41:56,429 ♪ Yes, I refuse ♪ 820 00:41:59,430 --> 00:42:03,392 ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪ 821 00:42:03,585 --> 00:42:05,507 So find your people... 822 00:42:05,770 --> 00:42:06,979 ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ 823 00:42:07,063 --> 00:42:08,063 and keep them close. 824 00:42:08,147 --> 00:42:12,693 ♪ Ooh, ooh, yes, I refuse ♪ 825 00:42:12,777 --> 00:42:14,862 Because when you're at your lowest... 826 00:42:19,674 --> 00:42:21,679 those people get you through. 827 00:42:25,956 --> 00:42:28,625 Sync corrections by srjanapala 61895

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