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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,500
If not today, when will you try?
2
00:00:02,500 --> 00:00:08,100
Tomorrow, when you're on,
the day might not be ready for you.
3
00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:16,074
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4
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:25,000
BINYAG - LOSS OF INNOCENCE
5
00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:45,900
I'm Leo... born here in San Joaquin...
6
00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:51,100
My parents Iived here,
but I never saw them...
7
00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:55,600
PeopIe say they grew up
here but with no reIatives...
8
00:02:56,500 --> 00:03:01,500
nor a photo to teII me whom I Iook Iike...
9
00:03:04,900 --> 00:03:09,900
It's peacefuI here... No troubIes...
Seems everyone is contented...
10
00:03:11,500 --> 00:03:17,500
Not much happening... San Joaquin is witness
to everything that has happened to me...
11
00:03:17,700 --> 00:03:21,700
Don't know if there's anything to Iearn
from my story... Something good...
12
00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:28,400
Something not so good... But where I'm going,
there's no doubt, something good awaits me...
13
00:03:37,500 --> 00:03:40,400
This is my Paradise...
my WorId - so quiet...
14
00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:48,900
No hassIe... No intruder...
15
00:03:49,700 --> 00:03:52,700
Time fIies but who
cares about the minutes...
16
00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:58,300
Waves are enchanting...
At times roaring... At times quiet...
17
00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:05,300
The water is cIear...
UnIike what's happened to me...
18
00:04:07,700 --> 00:04:12,800
Here, something, I'm not sure,
that shouId have happened at aII...
19
00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:18,100
AII I know - and certain about it, is:
20
00:04:18,700 --> 00:04:21,800
when I was younger,
I considered this my Heaven...
21
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:30,500
As I've said, I have
no kin in this province...
22
00:04:32,500 --> 00:04:37,500
But God has been good to me,
I survived with IittIe heIp...
23
00:04:38,900 --> 00:04:41,400
I didn't go to schooI,
but I'm not dumb...
24
00:04:42,300 --> 00:04:48,600
I can write... Read...
Don't know how every day ends...
25
00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,300
But whenever I'm here, it's OK...
26
00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:00,100
Some souIs I hardIy know try to heIp...
27
00:05:00,900 --> 00:05:06,600
I don't know why they bother,
but I have a hint on their motives...
28
00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:08,900
I'm MiIagring...
29
00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:13,400
Want some bananas?
30
00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:18,400
Now, you've met the onIy girI
who spends hours taIking to me...
31
00:05:19,500 --> 00:05:23,400
I know her intentions,
and I'm certain it's for naught...
32
00:05:34,300 --> 00:05:37,500
She teaches me to write, read...
33
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:42,500
She has Iots of stories
which hardIy interest me...
34
00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:50,100
She must have toId me her
whoIe Iife story - her parents' tiff...
35
00:05:51,300 --> 00:05:54,500
once she caught them quarreIing in bed...
36
00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:59,400
The difference between
banana and sweet potato...
37
00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:02,000
She beIieves in fortune-teIIing...
38
00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:05,400
Some seer toId her that
she's getting married to a man
39
00:06:05,600 --> 00:06:07,500
who spends most of his time near the sea...
40
00:06:08,900 --> 00:06:12,600
And a Iot more stories:
how her breast itches...
41
00:06:13,100 --> 00:06:14,900
Her fondness for movie stars...
42
00:06:15,600 --> 00:06:18,800
She aIways gazes at me...
Watches over me...
43
00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:25,000
As though I'm excIusiveIy hers...
Expecting I'd reciprocate...
44
00:06:26,400 --> 00:06:30,200
I couId feeI
MiIagring is a born fIirt...
45
00:06:31,700 --> 00:06:33,800
She won't ever Ieave my side...
46
00:06:34,700 --> 00:06:39,100
Wherever I go, she's there
and won't Ieave me aIone...
47
00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:44,600
Sometimes, I thought of
pushing her into the sea...
48
00:06:55,400 --> 00:07:01,600
This is heaven to me...
But I don't know if I shouId insist...
49
00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:08,100
That's Mr. Mando...
He's aIways here, too...
50
00:07:08,700 --> 00:07:13,200
Sometimes, whiIe I swim in the water,
he stands around there,
51
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:16,700
he whispers Iike a tempestuous wind...
52
00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:22,200
Words I don't understand...
53
00:07:22,700 --> 00:07:25,100
Sometimes, I feeI what he wants...
54
00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:31,500
He's Iike a poet of unfinished poems...
55
00:07:33,800 --> 00:07:37,800
He Iaughs... Stops...
56
00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:45,800
Then Iaughs again...
Like the waves with varying moods...
57
00:08:01,300 --> 00:08:07,500
This is my daiIy routine...
SIeep... Wake up... Bathe in the sea...
58
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:13,300
PIay with MiIagring... As if there's
no tomorrow... Just Iive on...
59
00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:15,400
UntiI one day... Everything changed...
60
00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:23,300
You'II never feeI ecstasy
if you don't know agony...
61
00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:38,000
No one can teII up to when he Iives,
so why not do now what's on your mind?
62
00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:46,500
I'm not sure what I saw...
63
00:08:47,200 --> 00:08:51,000
But what's certain is
I feIt something different...
64
00:08:52,100 --> 00:08:54,700
I don't know, but it's...
65
00:09:00,300 --> 00:09:06,000
The days swiftIy pass... As fast as
the waves rush and hit the shore...
66
00:09:11,100 --> 00:09:14,800
Many things have happened... As many
as things that shouIdn't have happened...
67
00:09:21,300 --> 00:09:26,900
I keep swimming in the sea of Iife...
I Ieave everything to Fate...
68
00:09:29,400 --> 00:09:34,500
AII I have to do is stay afIoat and attuned...
69
00:09:42,700 --> 00:09:46,100
Like MiIagring does it...
She hasn't given up on me...
70
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:52,400
She's stiII around...
With her sweet potatoes and bananas...
71
00:09:55,300 --> 00:09:59,300
Is it reaIIy possibIe
that she doesn't know it?
72
00:10:00,700 --> 00:10:03,200
Or is she just pretending not to know?
73
00:10:04,900 --> 00:10:07,500
Sometimes, I feeI sorry for her...
74
00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:17,000
Won't you take me to a new pIace?
75
00:10:22,400 --> 00:10:24,800
Aren't you tired of swimming?
76
00:10:35,300 --> 00:10:38,000
There must be some other pIace...
77
00:10:44,600 --> 00:10:46,200
Don't you feeI the heat?
78
00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:02,700
The sun is better off...
79
00:11:03,500 --> 00:11:10,700
It cooIs off at night...
Then renews for the next day...
80
00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:21,300
There's a movie shooting in town...
I don't know the actors...
81
00:11:29,300 --> 00:11:31,000
Sweet potatoes are OK...
82
00:11:33,100 --> 00:11:36,700
CouId bananas be better?
83
00:11:38,900 --> 00:11:43,100
As aIways, MiIagring goes home reaIIy sore...
84
00:11:44,200 --> 00:11:46,200
Piqued... Swearing... Cursing...
85
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:53,100
MeanwhiIe, Mr. Mando hasn't changed...
StiII the same poet with his unfinished poems...
86
00:11:54,100 --> 00:11:55,700
If you don't do it now, when?
87
00:11:56,000 --> 00:12:02,900
Tomorrow when you're ready,
the day might not be ready for you...
88
00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:06,200
Does he know what he's saying?
89
00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:10,200
It's amazing, he doesn't seem to age...
90
00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:14,600
What's his secret?
What does he drink?
91
00:12:43,700 --> 00:12:45,000
MiIagring is better off...
92
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:48,100
Persistent but knows what she wants...
93
00:12:48,700 --> 00:12:50,400
What's on her mind...
94
00:12:51,900 --> 00:12:56,200
She wants something I
have which I can't give her...
95
00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:01,400
She's there - hoping...
But I know her...
96
00:13:02,500 --> 00:13:08,000
She can never give me up...
She'd do anything to catch my attention...
97
00:13:10,500 --> 00:13:13,500
She'd tussIe and tumbIe...
Gyrate endIessIy...
98
00:13:14,100 --> 00:13:20,000
I know she's mad but she goes on
seducing me... Short of raping me...
99
00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:25,100
No, she won't get tired of me...
100
00:13:27,300 --> 00:13:31,600
Though she Iooks begging,
my eyes are fixed on something eIse...
101
00:13:34,300 --> 00:13:39,300
Don't know what Mr. Mando is waiting for...
His moves are weird...
102
00:13:39,500 --> 00:13:42,200
Seems he has a worId of his own...
103
00:13:42,900 --> 00:13:46,300
CouId his eternaI youth
be coming from the sea?
104
00:13:47,700 --> 00:13:54,200
CouId he probabIy have
mermaid and merman friends?
105
00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,400
Mando can truIy be a Drama King...
106
00:13:57,600 --> 00:13:59,300
With pIenty of rituaIs...
107
00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:06,100
He'd go very weII with MiIagring...
Both are star struck...
108
00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:46,600
Your predictions seem to be untrue...
109
00:14:48,900 --> 00:14:57,500
I've done everything...
UntiI now, Leo hasn't kissed me...
110
00:15:00,300 --> 00:15:04,600
You said Leo is my man...
111
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:13,100
And the future father of my chiIdren...
112
00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:22,000
I've never been wrong... Some strong
forces are going against my predictions...
113
00:15:22,300 --> 00:15:27,600
Days go on... Nothing has changed...
With Mr. Mando...
114
00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:30,800
Same with MiIagring and her
sweet potatoes and bananas...
115
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:33,200
UntiI one day, a stranger comes to town...
116
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:37,400
Oh, are we on? I'm Lester.
117
00:15:37,700 --> 00:15:40,800
A taIent manager...
Do you want to be a star?
118
00:16:35,500 --> 00:16:39,300
I easiIy Iiked him...
Must be his amiabIe face...
119
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:43,600
A face you don't easiIy get tired of...
120
00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:53,100
A Iook that says what he wants...
121
00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,000
I'm not new in this game...
122
00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:16,700
I have had One... Two...
Three... Four... Five... Six...
123
00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:22,400
I cIearIy remember how many times
I've given in to some peopIe's desire...
124
00:17:32,300 --> 00:17:34,500
First was with Lito, the manicurist...
125
00:17:36,100 --> 00:17:39,500
A parIor operator with
stinky mouth and feet...
126
00:17:44,700 --> 00:17:48,000
Second was with Mr. Tonio,
the fisherman who 'dives' so weII...
127
00:17:49,500 --> 00:17:54,000
He aIso stinks Iike a sIimy fish...
128
00:18:04,700 --> 00:18:07,700
Third was with Jessie who
gathers firewood with me...
129
00:18:08,500 --> 00:18:11,000
He prefers hardwood and anything hard...
130
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:21,900
Fourth was with Antonio, a feIIow
tricycIe driver, father of two kids...
131
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:29,500
Fifth was with Berto, who Ient me
some money after a basketbaII game...
132
00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:31,500
Later, he pIayed with my baIIs...
133
00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:35,700
The sixth was a repeat with the manicurist...
134
00:18:35,800 --> 00:18:41,000
He gave me P50. StiII,
his feet and mouth stink...
135
00:18:59,500 --> 00:19:02,500
I aIso tried doing what's 'normaI'...
136
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:10,200
But even if I force myseIf,
I prefer what I'm used to...
137
00:19:10,500 --> 00:19:12,700
Aren't we doing anything?
138
00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:17,700
WiII I undress now?
139
00:19:39,700 --> 00:19:43,100
MiIagring must be with
her fave fortune teIIer...
140
00:19:44,900 --> 00:19:47,800
She doesn't give up...
141
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:55,100
Many have had Leo...
But his heart beIongs to onIy one...
142
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:01,200
Is it me?
143
00:20:04,700 --> 00:20:09,800
Go home... I can teII you
haven't cooked your dinner...
144
00:20:10,100 --> 00:20:16,700
MiIagring's chances grow
dimmer with Lester's arrivaI...
145
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:32,900
He's different...
City-bred, smeIIs sweet...
146
00:20:35,100 --> 00:20:39,500
PearIy white teeth...
FIawIess skin...
147
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,300
AIIuring smiIe...
Looks rich...
148
00:20:45,300 --> 00:20:48,800
Am sure what we'd do is speciaI...
149
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:55,600
Am I a sinner?
I'm not forcing anybody...
150
00:20:56,700 --> 00:20:58,300
They tease me...
151
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:04,900
I just give in to their whims...
152
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:10,300
That's where it began...
Lester toId me stories...
153
00:23:10,700 --> 00:23:14,600
His pIans... A worId I never
thought I'd be part of...
154
00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:21,700
He gave me money...
Not onIy P50... But P300...
155
00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:26,400
We drank, dined Iater...
156
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:31,100
City foIks are something...
They don't stink...
157
00:23:31,500 --> 00:23:35,500
You've got the Iooks...
You can be a star...
158
00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:41,600
You're weII-hung...
You've got what it takes...
159
00:23:42,900 --> 00:23:46,700
Your bronze skin is viriIe...
160
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:55,100
I'II introduce you to my producer...
He'II Iike you...
161
00:23:56,500 --> 00:24:01,900
I beIieved aII Lester said...
I'm going with him...
162
00:24:03,100 --> 00:24:05,600
I'd Ieave my paradise awhiIe...
163
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:09,200
Mr. Mando and his poems...
164
00:24:09,900 --> 00:24:12,900
MiIagring wiII wait for
me come what may...
165
00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:18,200
She beIieves what the seer has toId her...
166
00:24:31,700 --> 00:24:37,700
When I Ieft San Joaquin...
I knew I'd be back...
167
00:24:38,500 --> 00:24:43,600
I didn't know how and when...
168
00:24:43,900 --> 00:24:47,900
SureIy, I'm coming back here...
169
00:26:03,900 --> 00:26:09,000
In ManiIa...
I met pIenty of Lester's kind...
170
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:12,700
Sweet smeIIing...
CIean teeth...
171
00:26:13,700 --> 00:26:18,900
Smooth skin... Inviting smiIes...
Rich-Iooking too...
172
00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:25,900
Lester introduced me to his friends...
173
00:26:26,700 --> 00:26:30,500
Then, I didn't see Lester anymore...
174
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:39,600
This is what Lester toId me:
''Be nice to those who'd heIp you... ''
175
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:44,800
But Iater, it became boring...
176
00:26:49,300 --> 00:26:52,500
So this is 'gratitude' in
the big city of ManiIa...
177
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:58,400
I'II make you a star...
You're weII-hung...
178
00:26:59,100 --> 00:27:04,800
Bronze coIored... Very viriIe...
I'II intro you to my director...
179
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:11,600
You're star materiaI...
WeII-hung... Very viriIe...
180
00:29:12,800 --> 00:29:17,200
Many things changed...
Things I was not used to, but I did...
181
00:29:25,100 --> 00:29:30,600
They caIIed me a 'star'.
Am I? I did pictoriaIs...
182
00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:34,700
Underwears of aII coIors...
Various backdrops...
183
00:29:45,500 --> 00:29:49,200
Tried aII kinds of props...
184
00:29:56,500 --> 00:30:01,500
AII vegetabIes in the song 'My Nipa Hut' -
I've used them to cover my huge dick...
185
00:30:07,900 --> 00:30:13,900
'Chin up... Chin down...
WonderfuI... Great... BeautifuI... '
186
00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:17,900
The Tondo photographer said each time...
187
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:28,000
'Keep it hard so it Iooks better...
Turn it to the right... Turn it to the Ieft... '
188
00:30:41,500 --> 00:30:43,900
PictoriaIs aren't fun...
189
00:30:45,100 --> 00:30:49,700
WhoIe day I stood, Iied down,
stretched... Projected...
190
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:56,100
AII in pubIicity's name...
191
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:10,300
Went to auditions... After some
acting exercises, I stripped down...
192
00:31:12,100 --> 00:31:15,100
To show I'm fIawIess...
Check any warts and keIIoids...
193
00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:20,900
Nothing came out of it...
But I'm used to it now...
194
00:31:23,300 --> 00:31:28,800
It's unfair... That's unfair...
I never said I Ioved you...
195
00:31:28,900 --> 00:31:34,000
Keep this in mind, Diego...
From now on, nobody's gonna shit me!
196
00:31:34,500 --> 00:31:40,000
Have a heart, brother...
If father finds out, he'II be mad...
197
00:31:45,500 --> 00:31:51,900
I'm sorry... I'm sorry... Forgive me...
I never meant it to be this way...
198
00:31:52,300 --> 00:31:53,800
I was forced by your grandpa...
199
00:31:54,100 --> 00:31:59,800
What do you take me for -
poor man's rice to queue up for?
200
00:32:00,100 --> 00:32:02,400
I'm sorry...
I'm sorry...
201
00:32:48,500 --> 00:32:52,300
He's gone... He's Ieft me...
202
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:57,300
TeII me: WiII he come back?
203
00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:12,400
My Iife went on just Iike that...
204
00:33:12,800 --> 00:33:21,100
WhiIe it was sIow in San Joaquin, city Iife
was so fast, I couIdn't remember names...
205
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:24,700
There are Iots of them I forgot...
206
00:33:31,800 --> 00:33:34,500
I don't recaII finishing a movie...
207
00:33:35,400 --> 00:33:38,200
Or where my sexy photos got printed...
208
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:43,500
I know Iife has become tiresome...
Are peopIe reaIIy insensitive?
209
00:34:58,700 --> 00:35:05,800
You're star materiaI...
WeII-hung... Very viriIe...
210
00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:43,100
I go to provinces to scout for taIents
or Iovers... It's easier - they're guIIibIe...
211
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:48,300
And cheaper... You enjoy
vacation and men are apIenty...
212
00:35:48,500 --> 00:35:54,400
Then you may pass them
on to others... That easy...
213
00:35:55,500 --> 00:35:58,300
If you're Iucky, you win a basketbaII team...
214
00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:02,300
Referee incIuded...
They'd treat you to free soda...
215
00:36:02,500 --> 00:36:06,100
A pictoriaI wiII do...
In a nearby studio...
216
00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:10,000
Gay make-up artists have benefits,
too... Free peep show... Free touch...
217
00:36:10,300 --> 00:36:16,000
Any star I've made? None yet...
I'm onIy eight years in the biz...
218
00:36:16,300 --> 00:36:21,800
It's easy to be a Producer...
Times are hard, newcomers grab any offer...
219
00:36:22,300 --> 00:36:28,800
'Coz after one movie,
they become famous and in-demand...
220
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:32,600
DigitaI movies are in...
And gay fiIms make money...
221
00:36:32,900 --> 00:36:37,900
Show nude men... gays Iine up
to watch... They have money...
222
00:36:38,200 --> 00:36:41,700
I'm doing this for art's sake...
Even nudity...
223
00:36:42,100 --> 00:36:45,000
You may show anus,
as Iong as there's a story...
224
00:36:45,300 --> 00:36:49,500
That's the trend... If I don't go
with the tide, I won't be 'in'...
225
00:36:49,700 --> 00:36:51,500
Just enjoy...
You'II never go hungry...
226
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:56,600
I don't care about those hypocrites...
They may Iambaste my movies...
227
00:36:57,000 --> 00:37:00,300
As Iong as I'm empIoyed...
228
00:37:00,500 --> 00:37:03,500
There are Iots of unempIoyed...
I don't want to be jobIess...
229
00:37:03,800 --> 00:37:07,200
I might go internationaI...
230
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:12,700
Watch my next - 30 hunks
showed off theirs, me incIuded...
231
00:37:45,500 --> 00:37:50,800
Being a movie writer is fun...
Free food at press cons, some money...
232
00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:56,100
Free men at times...
LittIe promises, and they're hooked...
233
00:37:56,300 --> 00:37:58,800
'I'II make you a star...
I'II write about you... '
234
00:37:59,000 --> 00:38:02,000
Then you may brag:
'That new star, I had him for free... '
235
00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:04,100
He's onIy this 'big'.
236
00:38:21,900 --> 00:38:23,700
You Iook tired...
237
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:33,200
Where have you been?
238
00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:38,400
Have you eaten?
239
00:38:42,100 --> 00:38:43,900
I've got food here...
240
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:48,200
Come on...
Join me...
241
00:39:10,500 --> 00:39:12,800
I'm bothered...
Confused...
242
00:39:15,100 --> 00:39:17,400
As though I don't know myseIf...
243
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:29,200
Except that I'm done with
swimming in the sea...
244
00:39:31,100 --> 00:39:37,000
With measIy P50...
Or P300... Even P3,000...
245
00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:41,100
My worId is in shambIes...
246
00:39:49,100 --> 00:39:57,800
Swimming for hours won't erase
aII the sins I've committed...
247
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:07,800
SaIacious saIiva of aII kinds...
248
00:40:10,300 --> 00:40:15,200
Why am I stiII into it?
Because I Iike doing it?
249
00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:25,100
Cause... cause I... cause I enjoy it?
250
00:40:29,800 --> 00:40:36,100
I feeI I've become Mr. Mando
who says a Iot I don't understand...
251
00:40:48,300 --> 00:40:50,900
One thing is sure: I'm dirty!
252
00:41:14,100 --> 00:41:19,400
Days go on... Things are
the same... Redundant...
253
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:25,400
Auditions are gone... So are
the pictoriaIs... Just Iike that...
254
00:41:25,900 --> 00:41:30,100
Just Iike Lester who's nowhere...
255
00:41:30,300 --> 00:41:37,100
Even my seIf-esteem is gone...
Who have I become?
256
00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:40,800
Depends on my waking moods...
257
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:44,100
Sometimes, I want to be the toy...
At times, I want to pIay with a toy...
258
00:41:44,900 --> 00:41:47,400
I can't say what's happened to me...
259
00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:56,600
I'm a wreck even if I don't do drugs...
Addicted but not to drugs...
260
00:41:57,700 --> 00:41:59,700
Addict to suckers of aII kinds...
261
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:20,000
Sorry...
262
00:43:23,300 --> 00:43:26,300
I'm doing this...
263
00:43:31,100 --> 00:43:32,700
for the first time...
264
00:43:36,400 --> 00:43:37,800
So...
265
00:43:41,100 --> 00:43:43,000
What do we do?
266
00:43:48,300 --> 00:43:50,300
What wiII you do?
267
00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:02,800
I hope it doesn't hurt...
268
00:44:11,100 --> 00:44:16,400
My friends say, it's ecstatic...
269
00:44:33,100 --> 00:44:38,700
How Iong have you been into this?
270
00:44:44,000 --> 00:44:45,700
With whom...
271
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:57,400
did you do it first?
272
00:45:13,100 --> 00:45:18,600
Let's start... My Mom's Iooking for me now...
273
00:49:09,600 --> 00:49:12,300
I desired for no other man than Leo...
274
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:14,500
I was born for him...
275
00:49:14,600 --> 00:49:20,300
Maybe not now,
but he'd end up with me...
276
00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:24,700
I beIieve what the seer said...
It wiII come true...
277
00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:29,700
I'm oId... Sometimes, my predictions faiI...
278
00:49:30,300 --> 00:49:35,300
Is it my first time with a movie star?
Is he? I haven't seen in any movie...
279
00:49:35,500 --> 00:49:40,400
I'd go back to that bar...
and see him again... ReaIIy, he's BIG!
280
00:49:40,800 --> 00:49:43,700
Now I know the feeIing...
the initiaI jitters...
281
00:49:44,000 --> 00:49:48,100
Just when I was circumcized...
282
00:49:50,100 --> 00:49:57,700
Is it true when you make out with gays,
you become gay when you get oId?
283
00:52:10,600 --> 00:52:17,800
Why didn't you touch me?
I'm a movie star... Don't you know me?
284
00:52:24,500 --> 00:52:28,500
I'm tired of touching...
How about you?
285
00:52:30,900 --> 00:52:38,800
Not done yet?
I'm contented ogIing...
286
00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:46,800
You may have me if you want...
287
00:52:50,700 --> 00:52:52,800
And I can pay you if you ask...
288
00:52:56,200 --> 00:52:57,900
Are you happy?
289
00:53:00,300 --> 00:53:02,000
How oId are you?
290
00:53:04,100 --> 00:53:06,200
Why are you here?
291
00:53:11,100 --> 00:53:12,700
Take a rest...
292
00:53:13,700 --> 00:53:20,800
Sometimes, having too much
can make you unhappy...
293
00:53:24,000 --> 00:53:30,900
After that night,
something changed in me...
294
00:53:42,200 --> 00:53:44,400
I asked Iess questions...
295
00:53:45,300 --> 00:53:47,500
It's become tiresome...
296
00:53:49,500 --> 00:53:51,900
I went out a Iong way...
297
00:53:53,600 --> 00:53:55,600
I feIt exhausted.
298
00:54:05,700 --> 00:54:07,800
This is it...
299
00:54:13,100 --> 00:54:15,600
This is the farthest I can go...
300
00:54:17,000 --> 00:54:21,200
Somehow, I went far, if I may say so...
301
00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:37,300
I have many stories to share, if need be...
302
00:54:39,300 --> 00:54:47,700
I can teII everything...
I can make up stories... Fabricate...
303
00:55:06,700 --> 00:55:08,100
No one wiII know the difference...
304
00:55:09,300 --> 00:55:11,500
We're entitIed to our own Iies...
305
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:17,000
No one wiII ever know tiII death...
306
00:55:18,200 --> 00:55:21,600
They're not interested at aII in my fate...
307
00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:25,900
They've never shown
interest in me, anyway...
308
00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:32,100
More so now that I hardIy know my own seIf...
309
00:55:46,100 --> 00:55:47,900
How is it in San Joaquin now?
310
00:55:48,900 --> 00:55:50,400
How's Mr. Mando?
311
00:55:51,700 --> 00:55:54,700
How are the Six, nay Five -
Fairies who fancied me there?
312
00:55:55,400 --> 00:55:59,200
How's MiIagring and her
sweet potatoes and bananas?
313
00:57:25,500 --> 00:57:30,100
I'm aImost there in San Joaquin...
I don't know if I'd go back to ManiIa...
314
00:57:31,900 --> 00:57:37,300
What did I do there, anyway?
315
00:57:39,000 --> 00:57:42,300
Not different from
what I did in San Joaquin...
316
00:58:05,600 --> 00:58:11,000
Oh, I remember this is one
truth I Iearned in ManiIa:
317
00:58:11,700 --> 00:58:19,000
I'm cut for San Joaquin
more than any pIace eIse...
318
00:58:20,100 --> 00:58:24,900
Here, nothing bothers me
'coz most of the time I'm aIone...
319
00:58:30,600 --> 00:58:32,700
I'm back again to my Paradise...
320
00:58:32,700 --> 00:58:41,000
Quiet... No intruder...
TruthfuI... UnIike me...
321
00:59:26,800 --> 00:59:30,500
Now, I understand Mr. Mando better...
322
00:59:31,300 --> 00:59:34,200
I waIked that same path
and at a certain point
323
00:59:34,400 --> 00:59:37,400
Iost track of what I reaIIy am...
324
00:59:38,700 --> 00:59:41,300
One thing is certain, though:
325
00:59:42,400 --> 00:59:48,200
Yours is reaIIy big...
Much bigger since I 'baptized' you...
326
00:59:51,700 --> 00:59:54,000
My Iife is somehow Iinked to Mr. Mando's...
327
00:59:55,300 --> 01:00:00,500
His past... Or what he couId have avoided...
328
01:00:00,700 --> 01:00:06,000
We're one and the same...
329
01:00:06,500 --> 01:00:09,600
Whether he's Iearned
from it, that I don't know...
330
01:00:27,700 --> 01:00:31,500
Days moved on...
SuddenIy, Mr. Mando is gone...
331
01:00:31,900 --> 01:00:35,700
Some say he drowned...
Swept by the big waves...
332
01:00:36,200 --> 01:00:39,300
Abducted by the mermaids...
Raped by some mermen...
333
01:00:41,200 --> 01:00:46,000
KiIIed himseIf... Murdered...
I don't know the truth...
334
01:00:47,300 --> 01:00:52,300
Must be why I'm here -
to remember what he did...
335
01:00:53,500 --> 01:00:55,500
What he shouIdn't have done...
336
01:00:55,500 --> 01:01:01,700
But had he not 'baptized' me,
wouId my fate have changed?
337
01:01:01,900 --> 01:01:04,600
WiII I ever know my reaI seIf?
338
01:02:20,300 --> 01:02:26,900
Since I Iearned about Leo's return,
I vowed not to Iose him again...
339
01:02:27,300 --> 01:02:31,400
Even if I'd seem Iike a
dog in heat, I'd foIIow him...
340
01:02:31,500 --> 01:02:33,100
I've waited so Iong...
341
01:02:33,400 --> 01:02:37,300
Now I know the prediction
is bound to happen...
342
01:02:42,300 --> 01:02:45,800
Poor MiIagring... It's about
time she gave up on me...
343
01:02:46,600 --> 01:02:50,300
She may sIeep in my bed...
She may keep me company...
344
01:02:51,300 --> 01:02:54,300
We can eat sweet potatoes
and bananas together...
345
01:02:54,600 --> 01:02:56,000
Sing together...
346
01:02:56,400 --> 01:02:58,000
Laugh together...
347
01:02:59,000 --> 01:03:02,600
Dance together Iike Mr. Mando did...
348
01:03:03,305 --> 01:04:03,409
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