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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,000
2
00:00:03,680 --> 00:00:07,440
Come on Kobna,
read the letter from your grandma.
3
00:00:07,440 --> 00:00:10,640
"Dear Walter,"
thank you for the money."
4
00:00:10,640 --> 00:00:12,760
(DOOR OPENS)
5
00:00:12,760 --> 00:00:14,480
Dad, is that you?
6
00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:16,360
(MUSIC PLAYS)
7
00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:19,520
Hey! Hey!
8
00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:21,840
Valentine!
Eh, eh, eh!
9
00:00:21,840 --> 00:00:24,280
The boat party!
What boat party?
10
00:00:24,280 --> 00:00:25,840
What did you done do to me, brother?
11
00:00:28,160 --> 00:00:31,560
(TURNS MUSIC OFF)
Kobna is not going to a boat party.
12
00:00:31,560 --> 00:00:34,000
Eh, my sister,
you know this is our favourite.
13
00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:35,000
What boat party?
14
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,640
Kobna, go and get your schoolbag.
15
00:00:36,640 --> 00:00:39,680
Ah, but hey, you want to know
about the boat party? Hey?
16
00:00:39,680 --> 00:00:41,520
Every few months our brothers
17
00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:44,880
bring produce on a big,
big, big, big ship from Lagos, yeah?
18
00:00:44,880 --> 00:00:48,040
And exchange for a special shipments
of records for me,
19
00:00:48,040 --> 00:00:51,200
I DJ at the welcome party, eh?
20
00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:55,760
Everybody will be dancing to
my music with smooth dancing moves.
21
00:00:55,760 --> 00:00:57,320
(MUSIC STARTS)
22
00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:03,640
What sensible person wants to hang
around with drunkard sailors
23
00:01:03,640 --> 00:01:05,840
and women of ill reputes?
I do.
24
00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:08,080
But I must warn you,
this is a naughty bastard zone...
25
00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:10,520
Are you sure you're ready for this?
Of course.
26
00:01:10,520 --> 00:01:14,680
Hey, this is very good,
you need to teach me this.
27
00:01:14,680 --> 00:01:17,120
Kobna, you are not going.
Why?
28
00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:19,600
Because I said so,
now go and get your bag.
29
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:25,200
Eh eh eh, you don't know
about my poppin' body eh?
30
00:01:26,680 --> 00:01:27,760
Wow.
31
00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:38,760
AGGIE: Say no to regeneration.
Save the Eastbridge.
32
00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:42,840
Say no to regeneration.
Save the Eastbridge.
33
00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:47,400
Say no to regeneration,
save the East...
34
00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:48,800
Oh! Oh!
35
00:01:48,800 --> 00:01:52,160
Come in, come in Aggie.
I need to talk to you.
36
00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:54,240
Now come on through...
37
00:01:54,240 --> 00:01:57,480
Ah! What is going on, Kirsty?
38
00:01:57,480 --> 00:01:59,240
She's bloody lost it,
that's what's going on.
39
00:01:59,240 --> 00:02:01,680
Just stir the bloody pot, Bagpipes.
Oh what?
40
00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:03,560
And give myself
carpel tunnel syndrome?
41
00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:05,240
You'll be wishing you
had bloody carpel...
42
00:02:05,240 --> 00:02:07,360
Oh, let me just do...
Oh shit.
43
00:02:08,520 --> 00:02:11,320
I'll do that, Bagpipes, let me help.
44
00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:13,600
Well, look, it's not gonna be
sniffed at Kirst, alright?
45
00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:16,480
What's that? Is that burnt toast.
That's a sign of a stroke.
46
00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:19,440
I'd better get
my medical dictionary.
47
00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:22,480
It is toast you...
48
00:02:28,040 --> 00:02:29,880
So, what am I doing here, Kirsty?
49
00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:32,120
Kirsty's Katering, with a K,
50
00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:34,320
has got its first proper job
51
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,320
with some yuppies tomorrow.
52
00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:37,600
Oh, congratulations.
53
00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:40,040
Yeah. well, Nicola's
supposed to be helping me out
54
00:02:40,040 --> 00:02:43,040
and she's got
one of her bloody cold sores again.
55
00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:44,400
So, and that's not the type of image
56
00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:47,600
that I want Kirsty's Katering,
with a K, to project so...
57
00:02:47,600 --> 00:02:49,240
Ag?
58
00:02:50,560 --> 00:02:52,280
I have a favour to ask...
59
00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:53,720
Please?
60
00:02:53,720 --> 00:02:55,680
Please?
61
00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:57,040
Fine, I'll be there.
62
00:02:57,040 --> 00:02:59,000
Thank you.
63
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,360
I think me eyeballs are too dry.
64
00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:01,400
BOTH: What?
65
00:03:06,760 --> 00:03:09,120
(CHICKEN DANCE PLAYS)
66
00:03:10,920 --> 00:03:12,760
(LAUGHS)
67
00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:14,080
If I was to do this on the boat,
68
00:03:14,080 --> 00:03:17,120
they will make me walk the plank,
argh.
69
00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:19,800
Ah, you wouldn't catch me
on a boat, it's too risky.
70
00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:21,440
It is not moving.
71
00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:23,040
Well, sinking's moving.
72
00:03:23,040 --> 00:03:26,760
Eh, next you will tell me that
fishing is too risky, eh, Bagpipes?
73
00:03:26,760 --> 00:03:28,040
Err, it's not without risk Valy,
74
00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:30,480
I mean the rivers
are teeming with parasites.
75
00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:32,160
Those hooks are bloody sharp
and all.
76
00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:35,200
Bagpipes, you love fishing,
what has happened?
77
00:03:35,200 --> 00:03:39,280
Well, last time I went
I nearly died, mate.
78
00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:42,080
Eh?
Mmm. I'm not going back.
79
00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:44,080
So, let me get this right,
80
00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:47,760
you are telling me that if you go
fishing tomorrow you will die?
81
00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:49,640
Hey? No.
Oh...
82
00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:51,280
Err, well...
83
00:03:51,280 --> 00:03:53,320
No. I don't think so.
84
00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,520
Um, nah, of course not.
85
00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:56,720
Um...I think.
86
00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,320
Then go!
87
00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:01,920
Be brave, confront your fear.
88
00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:04,200
I can't. I can't...
Why not?
89
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:05,520
I, err...
90
00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:07,480
I haven't got anyone
to go with, yeah.
91
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:10,080
And err it's like sex,
92
00:04:10,080 --> 00:04:14,040
you know, it's only fun with someone
else, ideally wearing waders...
93
00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:19,800
Eh, Walter is free. Tomorrow he will
take you to the riverbank, huh?
94
00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:22,640
Riverbank? You're going
to the riverbank tomorrow?
95
00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:23,800
Mm-hm.
96
00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:26,560
Fantastic,
I'll bring, err, sustenance.
97
00:04:26,560 --> 00:04:28,280
Eh.
Right. OK.
98
00:04:28,280 --> 00:04:29,920
Cheers.
Cheers.
99
00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:30,920
Cheers.
100
00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:44,560
Psst! Oi oi.
101
00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:47,400
Nice shirt.
Hey hey.
102
00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,360
Is that why you left this one
at mine?
103
00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:51,120
What?
This is ugly.
104
00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:52,760
If you want, I can burn it for you?
105
00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:56,320
Hey, this is C&A's
finest tailoring, huh?
106
00:04:57,840 --> 00:05:00,160
Mmm. You are looking pepper today,
hey?
107
00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:02,440
Hey! Nephew!
108
00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:05,000
AKA house boy, good news, you are
coming to the boat party today.
109
00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,640
But what about Mum?
She doesn't want me to go.
110
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:08,760
Don't worry about her,
111
00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:11,480
I told her you are going fishing
with your father, huh? Huh?
112
00:05:12,920 --> 00:05:15,400
Well, seeing as your uncle's
not gonna introduce us,
113
00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:20,720
hi, I'm Dawn.
Aunty. Yes. Err, Aunty Dawn.
114
00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:23,560
Err this is your Aunty Dawn, Kobna,
mmm?
115
00:05:23,560 --> 00:05:26,960
And, err, this is, err,
Kobna's friend, Mr Barney.
116
00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:28,480
Hi.
117
00:05:28,480 --> 00:05:31,200
Yeah, I can't go to the boat party.
118
00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:32,440
What?
119
00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:34,000
I've got things to do.
120
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:36,240
You nutta, it's a boat party.
Exactly.
121
00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:38,800
What things are greater
than listening to great music
122
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:43,400
and dancing
with many beautiful err...
123
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:46,880
..sailors, like many sailors.
124
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:49,680
Oh, looks like
you're gonna have a lot of fun.
125
00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:53,320
Nice to meet you Kobna, Barney.
126
00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:55,200
Aunty's gotta go.
127
00:05:57,480 --> 00:05:58,640
Is that your girlfriend now?
128
00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:03,080
Err, girlfriend. Sheesh, house boy,
ha you have a lot to learn, eh?
129
00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:08,280
So, err, are you coming or not?
130
00:06:08,280 --> 00:06:12,120
Ye-yeah, yeah, I've just got to sort
something out first.
131
00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:24,560
Oh, Ag, a mixer tap...
132
00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:29,800
And Fairy bloody liquid!
133
00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:31,920
(INHALES DEEPLY)
134
00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:36,240
When Kirsty's Katering, with a K,
takes off, I'm having all of this.
135
00:06:36,240 --> 00:06:39,800
Agnes, there's something
I have to tell you.
136
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:42,760
This job, it kind of came from...
137
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:44,920
Charles.
You're bloody psychic.
138
00:06:44,920 --> 00:06:46,320
Ah.
139
00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:50,920
Yeah. Well, he's a friend a client
so it kind of came from him.
140
00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:53,040
And I'm sorry
I didn't tell you before
141
00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:55,160
but I thought you wouldn't help me
if I did.
142
00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:58,800
Mmm. You're right about that.
How could you do this to me? Huh?
143
00:06:58,800 --> 00:06:59,880
I was desperate.
144
00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:04,320
Oh, please, Ag?
145
00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:05,680
I need this.
146
00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:08,960
Sorry.
147
00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:12,720
OK.
Oh...
148
00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:13,960
I'll be professional.
149
00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:17,560
Oh great, great.
150
00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:19,320
Thank you.
151
00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:20,560
Oh...
152
00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:31,720
Bloody hell, Bagpipes. It's been two
hours, is anything gonna happen?
153
00:07:31,720 --> 00:07:34,320
Christ, I hope not.
154
00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:37,880
Well here's to Sierra Leone's
best creation.
155
00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,920
What's in there? Something Indian?
Yeah.
156
00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:43,240
My daddy.
157
00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:46,720
He died last week.
158
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:51,800
Christ,
what'd you bring him here for?
159
00:07:51,800 --> 00:07:55,960
It is my duty to spread him
on a river that flows into the sea.
160
00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:58,880
It should be the Ganges
but I couldn't afford the airfare.
161
00:08:00,360 --> 00:08:03,120
But I mean I think by
the time you get to err...
162
00:08:03,120 --> 00:08:05,280
Yeah. It all connects.
Battersea...
163
00:08:05,280 --> 00:08:06,280
Connects up, you know?
164
00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:08,400
You think?
165
00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:10,760
Rajesh man, what happened?
166
00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:15,360
He was err, he was on the settee
watching his err Blockbuster,
167
00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:16,600
you know that err...
168
00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:19,720
# Dah, dah, dah, dah... #
169
00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:21,920
..that one.
Yeah.
170
00:08:21,920 --> 00:08:24,000
I sat and told him my big news...
171
00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:31,120
He listened, no interrupting,
no telling me I'm getting fat.
172
00:08:32,680 --> 00:08:36,040
But he wasn't listening, Walter,
he was dead.
173
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:40,280
A heart attack took him.
174
00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:44,800
Bloody hell, a heart attack,
err, had he had dry eyeballs?
175
00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:49,360
Rajesh, I'm sorry man.
176
00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:53,880
What was your big news?
Oh...
177
00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:55,680
I'm going to be a father!
178
00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:57,240
Hooray!
I'm so happy.
179
00:08:57,240 --> 00:08:59,600
Get in there, my son.
You know what?
180
00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:02,440
You need some, you need some...
181
00:09:02,440 --> 00:09:03,960
I'll hold Daddy.
182
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,680
What the hell is that?
183
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:08,320
It's disgusting.
Err...
184
00:09:08,320 --> 00:09:10,320
It's a bit warm, that's a bit warm.
Get me a beer please.
185
00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:27,000
Ah, good, good,
err, go around the back.
186
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:31,880
Yeah, uncle. I can't work
for you today or any other day.
187
00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:34,320
What is this?
188
00:09:34,320 --> 00:09:37,280
A debt is a debt
and it must be paid in full.
189
00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:39,680
Yeah. I must've paid off my debt
by now.
190
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:43,800
The monetary debt yes,
but the Lord's debt?
191
00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:45,680
The Lord's debt?
192
00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:47,320
Causing a near-fatal collision.
193
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:50,640
Ha, he saved me
194
00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:56,560
and thankfully it was only my neck
that was injured.
195
00:09:56,560 --> 00:09:59,160
Just today then?
Mmm.
196
00:09:59,160 --> 00:10:03,120
However,
God does love a cheerful giver
197
00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:07,320
so I will cheerfully
give you the day off.
198
00:10:07,320 --> 00:10:08,480
But!
199
00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:12,360
Be back tomorrow, or your
father will hear from me.
200
00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:25,880
Hi, would you like
some smoked salmon or vol au vents?
201
00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:32,320
One has done many of these soirees,
202
00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:36,360
Mick Jar-ger, Michael Caine,
Noel Edmunds.
203
00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:44,360
Eh, it's not a bin.
204
00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:48,680
The Queen Mum always insists
on these at Clarence House.
205
00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:52,880
Your English is very good.
206
00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:56,480
Yours... Is... Not.
207
00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:01,920
Charles warned me they were
a bit rough around the edges.
208
00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:06,240
Oh, yes, Charles does say
a lot of stupid things.
209
00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:08,960
Agnes?
210
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:12,720
Can I conversate with you
about the hor-derves, please?
211
00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:15,040
Yes, ma'am.
212
00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:18,240
Huh?
213
00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:19,920
How can you make
all these lovely foods
214
00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:22,360
and all they want to do
is eat olives?
215
00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:37,000
(HORN TOOTS)
216
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,800
Are you ready?
217
00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:47,800
Hey. Mr...
218
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,640
Hey, Sharon,
where's your husband, eh?
219
00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:51,160
Hey, come on.
220
00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:53,560
There's only one rule at this party.
221
00:11:53,560 --> 00:11:56,040
What happens on the boat
stays on the boat.
222
00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:57,480
Yes?
223
00:11:57,480 --> 00:12:02,960
Kobna, nephew,
hey, look at your face, eh?
224
00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:05,720
Hey, my shipment,
how are you, my brother?
225
00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,840
Hey, hey house boy, close your mouth
and concentrate, eh?
226
00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:10,840
Look at this...
227
00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:15,680
Oh, Orchestra Muyei, hey,
Afro-National, Super Combo, hey!
228
00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:19,240
When London hears me play
Maringa, Afropop and...
229
00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:22,520
Legs!
230
00:12:22,520 --> 00:12:23,800
Legs?
231
00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:25,080
Oh...
232
00:12:25,080 --> 00:12:27,560
Hey, do I look good?
233
00:12:27,560 --> 00:12:32,840
OK. OK. You watch these
while I watch them.
234
00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:37,440
But... Uncle Valy!
235
00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:38,680
Uncle Valy!
236
00:12:40,240 --> 00:12:44,680
They are rude people, Kirsty,
no manners.
237
00:12:44,680 --> 00:12:47,760
They're not used to people like us.
That's all.
238
00:12:47,760 --> 00:12:49,640
Mmm. I'm not surprised, huh?
239
00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:53,440
They are friends of Charles Lander.
I knew it.
240
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:56,240
You couldn't let the Charles thing
go just for one afternoon.
241
00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:57,240
Let it go?
242
00:12:57,240 --> 00:12:59,560
He wants to destroy our community.
243
00:12:59,560 --> 00:13:03,600
The estate's run down,
you said that yourself.
244
00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:07,360
Maybe the regeneration
is actually a good thing.
245
00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:09,920
You said you'd be professional.
246
00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:14,200
Yes...
247
00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:15,560
..boss.
248
00:13:17,680 --> 00:13:19,240
Professional.
249
00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:24,880
Thank you. Thank you, darling,
I'm going to go and check...
250
00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:25,880
Arrgh!
251
00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:31,920
The cleaner's cupboard
is in the utility room.
252
00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:33,640
The what?
253
00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:37,000
The cleaner's cupboard, it's in
the utility room over there, please.
254
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:38,280
Who is the cleaner?
255
00:13:40,600 --> 00:13:42,040
It's over there.
256
00:13:42,040 --> 00:13:43,680
Thank you.
257
00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:52,440
I'm ever so sorry about that.
258
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:54,440
Oh, that's embarrassing.
259
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:03,640
I like your shoes.
260
00:14:03,640 --> 00:14:05,600
I like your shoes, do they come off?
261
00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:08,880
No. No. No. But seriously...
262
00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:12,800
I, err, never thought it was possible
263
00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:16,000
but beautiful mermaids do exist, eh?
264
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:19,600
That line is probably going to work
well with the girls back home.
265
00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:21,080
Mmm.
266
00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:23,880
But I'm Karla from Essex, mate,
just buy me a drink.
267
00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:24,880
Hey...
268
00:14:28,560 --> 00:14:32,080
Hey, get me some triple hairy
naughty bastards, man.
269
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:35,880
Actually, forget that,
let's go and dance eh?
270
00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:37,680
Look at you, show me
what you can do eh?
271
00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:40,880
Mm mm mm hey.
272
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:46,920
Let's get...
273
00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:48,760
Yeah.
Woo!
274
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:56,000
Sad and happy and guilty
all at the same time.
275
00:14:57,720 --> 00:15:00,000
Is this a mental difficulty?
276
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:04,880
No, man. That is fatherhood. You will
feel all them things everyday.
277
00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:06,720
Mmm.
Yeah.
278
00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:08,880
And then you die.
279
00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:13,120
It's always there, death, always...
280
00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:15,240
..waiting.
281
00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:19,760
Message received loud and clear, ta.
282
00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,560
No more risks, Bagpipes, stay safe.
283
00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:25,720
No more saveloys,
I'm on a health kick.
284
00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:27,080
Cheers.
285
00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:31,960
Compliments on the food, Kirsty,
such an interesting mix of cultures.
286
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:36,960
Although you might want
to make your hiring policy
287
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:40,200
a little less interesting,
if you get my drift?
288
00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:42,720
Yeah?
289
00:15:42,720 --> 00:15:45,400
Oh, there you go. Thank you.
290
00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:00,960
They docked me for the broken dish.
291
00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:02,240
Yeah.
292
00:16:02,240 --> 00:16:04,240
It's not right, Kirsty.
293
00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:05,480
I know, Ag.
294
00:16:05,480 --> 00:16:11,800
I can't go pissing off clients just
because they've ripped off my mate.
295
00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:14,040
Shit.
296
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:20,800
Right. Stick this lot in the car
and then I'll be back in a minute.
297
00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:25,520
Ah, I'm glad you haven't left.
298
00:16:25,520 --> 00:16:29,600
Yeah. I wanted one more
last look at all this.
299
00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:34,360
This place, it's the reason why
I started my business,
300
00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:36,840
why I graft so hard.
301
00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:38,120
But there ain't no point
302
00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:41,120
if I'm selling out my mate
to some chinless prat...
303
00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:42,800
Excuse me, what...
304
00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:47,600
That woman out there
is a proper lady mate.
305
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:51,120
The classiest bird you've ever met.
But I'm not.
306
00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:55,200
So if you don't wanna be digesting
some poxy knick-knack
307
00:16:55,200 --> 00:16:56,760
for the next week...
Oh...
308
00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:58,800
..you'd better hand over the...
309
00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:01,240
What's that?
310
00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:03,480
The...this is your friend's money.
311
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:05,320
I gave you the envelope
for the cleaner by mistake.
312
00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:08,440
Oh... Right. Um...
313
00:17:15,120 --> 00:17:17,880
Careful, it's an antique.
314
00:17:19,360 --> 00:17:21,640
Any chance of a recommend...
Oh, none whatsoever.
315
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,920
Didn't...didn't think so.
316
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:26,480
Ta.
317
00:17:30,920 --> 00:17:34,160
Fish! Fish! Fish! Fish!
318
00:17:34,160 --> 00:17:35,560
Oh, err...
Fish!
319
00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:38,440
Reel it in.
I... I can't.
320
00:17:38,440 --> 00:17:39,880
What do you mean?
I can't.
321
00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:40,960
Yes. You can.
322
00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:42,600
Yes. You can,
bring the bloody thing in man.
323
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:44,600
Come on. Pull it, pull it.
Pull it, pull it!
324
00:17:44,600 --> 00:17:47,680
A-ha, here he comes.
Put your back into it.
325
00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:49,200
Yeah. Alright. OK. Alright.
326
00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:51,160
Gotta do, you know,
you've just gotta play it.
327
00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:53,280
Alright. Alright here he comes.
Here he comes.
328
00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:54,800
OK. OK. OK.
329
00:17:56,920 --> 00:17:57,920
He's gone.
330
00:17:57,920 --> 00:17:59,360
No. No. No. No.
331
00:17:59,360 --> 00:18:01,480
No. He's gone, he's gone.
What do you mean?
332
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:04,080
He's in there!
Pull it, pull it, pull it!
333
00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:08,040
(ALL EXCLAIM)
334
00:18:08,040 --> 00:18:09,840
Come on!
335
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:25,560
Oooh...
336
00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:28,840
Let's go and find somewhere quiet...
Wait, wait, wait.
337
00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:31,000
Wow, wow what am I doing?
What?
338
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:35,280
Ah, eish, I cannot, err,
I cannot go with you, Karla.
339
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:36,680
I'm sorry.
Oh, why?
340
00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:39,520
Err, it would be
a mistake because um...
341
00:18:41,680 --> 00:18:44,520
Eh, I have a girlfriend! Hey.
342
00:18:44,520 --> 00:18:46,720
Oh you know what they say...
What is this?
343
00:18:46,720 --> 00:18:48,560
What happens on the boat...
344
00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:49,680
..stays on the boat.
345
00:18:49,680 --> 00:18:51,480
Ha. Eh, no, no, no, no, no,
346
00:18:51,480 --> 00:18:52,680
that is why
I need to get off the boat.
347
00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:55,720
Look, ah, I'm sorry,
you are a very...
348
00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:57,240
Eish, err beautiful...
349
00:18:57,240 --> 00:19:02,720
..mmm, mermaid,
but I must return to land.
350
00:19:02,720 --> 00:19:05,120
You sure?
351
00:19:05,120 --> 00:19:06,240
Hey, stop it.
352
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:09,920
Hey. Oh, sorry. Forgive me, Eh?
Eh, next week, Kwame, yes?
353
00:19:16,400 --> 00:19:19,280
Eish no, err Kobna! House boy!
354
00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:21,280
Time to go!
355
00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:24,120
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Ha!
356
00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:28,920
I don't believe it.
It's the same bloody fish!
357
00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:31,240
What do you mean? Eh?
358
00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:32,560
I'd recognise that face anywhere.
359
00:19:32,560 --> 00:19:34,400
But brother, it's just a...
it's just a fish, Bagpipes.
360
00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:36,520
No no no,
it's not just a fish, is it?
361
00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:38,400
It's just a fish
minding its own business
362
00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:42,680
and then plucked from very existence
by some silly sod who wants a laugh.
363
00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:44,560
And now he's over and done with!
What do you mean?
364
00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:47,000
He's not done with, he's still here!
Yeah. He's still here, man.
365
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:50,080
He's a happy fish swimming
in the water, making tadpoles,
366
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:51,640
eating maggots and then...
367
00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:54,840
Listen, he knows that one day
the big hook is gonna take him out
368
00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:58,080
but until then he's just livin',
otherwise he's already dead.
369
00:19:58,080 --> 00:19:59,560
And you are like him, Baggy!
370
00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:01,840
You are like this,
strong like this salmon.
371
00:20:01,840 --> 00:20:05,480
You are exactly like him,
just a happy fish...
372
00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:07,600
Gasping for air, oh...
he's gasping for air.
373
00:20:07,600 --> 00:20:09,960
He's gasping. He's gasping. Shit.
374
00:20:14,320 --> 00:20:16,040
Yeah...
375
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:18,000
I think he's gonna be alright.
376
00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:22,320
Of course he is, Bagpipes.
Of course he is.
377
00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:28,840
# Many rivers to cross...
378
00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:32,240
# But I can't seem to find... #
379
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:33,920
Time to see to Daddy.
380
00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:42,320
# Wandering, I am lost
381
00:20:44,120 --> 00:20:47,040
# As I travel along... #
Goodbye, Daddy.
382
00:20:48,520 --> 00:20:51,560
# ..the white cliffs of Dover
383
00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:57,600
# Many rivers to cross... #
384
00:20:57,600 --> 00:21:02,680
Dear, Mama, Sorry it has been so long
since I wrote
385
00:21:02,680 --> 00:21:05,240
but I've reached
an important decision in my life
386
00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:06,560
that I want to share with you.
387
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,520
It is a decision
about the sort of man that I am
388
00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:14,040
and what I want to be...
389
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:20,440
..someone who is honourable
and loyal,
390
00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:25,160
someone who is there for the good
moments as well as the bad.
391
00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:31,240
Someone with love in his heart.
392
00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:45,760
# Many rivers to cross
393
00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:50,680
# But just where to begin
394
00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:53,040
# I'm playing for time
395
00:21:55,120 --> 00:22:00,480
# There are times I find myself
396
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:04,360
# Thinking of committing
397
00:22:04,360 --> 00:22:08,200
# Some dreadful crime
398
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:11,760
# Yes, I've got many rivers
to cross... #
399
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:13,240
Captions by Red Bee Media
400
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:14,960
Copyright
Australian Broadcasting Corporation
401
00:22:14,960 --> 00:22:15,960
29056
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