Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,334 --> 00:00:03,268
Does everybody know what time it is?
2
00:00:03,336 --> 00:00:05,099
Tool Time!
3
00:00:05,205 --> 00:00:09,767
That's right. Binford Tools is proud
to present Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor!
4
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:12,141
[cheering]
5
00:00:13,980 --> 00:00:15,743
Thank you.
6
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,180
Thank you, everybody.
7
00:00:18,118 --> 00:00:21,610
Thank you, Heidi, our Tool Time
mother-to-be.
8
00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:23,918
[cheering]
9
00:00:23,990 --> 00:00:26,857
Welcome to Tool Time.
l am Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor.
10
00:00:26,926 --> 00:00:29,793
Of course, you all know my assistant,
Al Borland.
11
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,296
[cheering]
12
00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:36,334
Yesterday we showed you how to treat
an electrical burn.
13
00:00:41,141 --> 00:00:43,302
And a thermal burn.
14
00:00:44,911 --> 00:00:49,075
Now we're showing the important part,
fire safety equipment for the home.
15
00:00:49,149 --> 00:00:50,878
[siren sounding]
16
00:00:50,950 --> 00:00:54,613
The most important piece of equipment
in your home is the smoke alarm.
17
00:00:54,687 --> 00:00:57,155
We suggest putting one of these
in every room.
18
00:00:57,223 --> 00:01:00,454
And if you're like Tim
you should wear one on you belt.
19
00:01:05,331 --> 00:01:08,630
lt's also important to have
a quality chemical extinguisher.
20
00:01:08,701 --> 00:01:11,397
Right. Now, what if
your extinguisher is empty
21
00:01:11,471 --> 00:01:12,961
and the fire is spreading?
22
00:01:13,039 --> 00:01:15,530
Run like hell
and hope you have good insurance.
23
00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:18,135
Binford has a better idea.
24
00:01:18,211 --> 00:01:19,974
They always do, Al.
25
00:01:20,046 --> 00:01:21,809
Show us what they got.
26
00:01:21,881 --> 00:01:25,908
lntroducing the Binford 61 00
Home Fireman.
27
00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,478
lt taps right into your cold water line.
28
00:01:28,555 --> 00:01:32,389
You want to be sure the main valve
is in the ''o' position when stored.
29
00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:34,791
Now, you got 40 feet of hose,
30
00:01:34,861 --> 00:01:36,351
double hose construction
31
00:01:36,429 --> 00:01:38,659
and a separate onloff switch right here.
32
00:01:38,731 --> 00:01:40,062
- [man screaming]
- Oh!
33
00:01:43,970 --> 00:01:48,464
That's perfect if you want to put out
a cigarette or irritated Teamster.
34
00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:54,738
- But a real man needs real protection.
- What are you talking about?
35
00:01:54,814 --> 00:01:57,510
l remodeled a little more power
to the home fireman.
36
00:01:57,584 --> 00:02:02,078
- Uh, fire safety is no joking matter.
- l'm not joking about this, Al.
37
00:02:02,155 --> 00:02:04,783
Tim, this hose is not constructed
for any more pressure.
38
00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:07,349
l don't want to get wet.
The audience doesn't want to.
39
00:02:07,427 --> 00:02:11,363
Al! Ladies and gentlemen, the Tim Taylor
version of The Home Fireman.
40
00:02:11,431 --> 00:02:13,524
Ladies and gentlemen, take cover!
41
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:21,074
Are you looking for series in italian?
Find them on filmamo.it !
42
00:03:11,491 --> 00:03:14,460
Well, they finally settled
my Aunt Sharon's estate.
43
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:16,188
Cool. What's our cut?
44
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:20,825
Brad, don't be disrespectful.
45
00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:23,425
Brad. What's our cut?
46
00:03:26,272 --> 00:03:27,830
Oh, my God.
47
00:03:27,907 --> 00:03:30,068
lt's $56,000!
48
00:03:30,143 --> 00:03:32,907
She's giving us 56,000 smackaroonies?
49
00:03:32,979 --> 00:03:34,879
Well, no, to me and my sisters.
50
00:03:34,948 --> 00:03:37,314
Split it five ways? Ugh.
51
00:03:37,383 --> 00:03:40,147
lnheritance tax, probate costs,
lawyer fees,
52
00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:42,586
tolls, tips, gratuities, who knows?
53
00:03:42,655 --> 00:03:44,816
Well, how much do you think
is gonna be left?
54
00:03:44,924 --> 00:03:48,382
Put it this way. Your Aunt Sharon is not
the only one to end up in the hole.
55
00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:52,889
l don't think so.
56
00:03:52,999 --> 00:03:55,763
Look at this.
Not too shabby.
57
00:03:55,835 --> 00:03:59,293
Well, did Aunt Sharon mention...
Well, l was her favorite nephew?
58
00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:03,337
Sorry. Apparently,
Aunt Sharon stipulated
59
00:04:03,443 --> 00:04:07,174
that l spend the money on myself
for something frivolous.
60
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:10,113
She doesn't want me to live my life
the way she did.
61
00:04:10,216 --> 00:04:13,549
She didn't spend a dime on anything.
She made her own salt.
62
00:04:14,687 --> 00:04:17,850
l still can't believe Aunt Sharon
left us out of her will.
63
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:20,085
Yeah, l mean, we were always
so nice to her.
64
00:04:20,159 --> 00:04:21,649
Which one was she?
65
00:04:23,329 --> 00:04:25,695
l believe she was the bald one.
66
00:04:25,798 --> 00:04:29,256
You're gonna have to narrow it down
a little more than that.
67
00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:34,565
Wow. lt's not gonna be easy to go out
and spend all this money on myself.
68
00:04:34,674 --> 00:04:37,643
Spend it on me.
At least it's going to a good cause.
69
00:04:39,145 --> 00:04:42,012
There's a lot of things
l could do with this money.
70
00:04:42,081 --> 00:04:44,379
- l could go on a trip.
- Yeah.
71
00:04:45,985 --> 00:04:47,748
We could go to lndy.
72
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:50,885
l could buy a lot of clothes.
73
00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:52,652
You could wear them to lndy.
74
00:04:52,725 --> 00:04:54,659
Would you forget about lndy?
75
00:04:54,727 --> 00:04:56,820
Wow.
76
00:04:57,897 --> 00:05:00,388
There is one thing
that l've always wanted.
77
00:05:01,567 --> 00:05:03,194
l used to have this boyfriend...
78
00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:05,737
No, no, no.
You're not buying an old boyfriend.
79
00:05:07,573 --> 00:05:11,339
No! He had this really cute
little sports car
80
00:05:11,444 --> 00:05:13,412
and l always wanted one just like it.
81
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:15,242
Wait a minute.
82
00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:18,478
You're considering dropping that money
on a car you don't need?
83
00:05:18,584 --> 00:05:20,848
- l love you. l love you.
- No.
84
00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:23,016
l can't. lt's too crazy.
85
00:05:23,089 --> 00:05:26,388
You'll look great running around
the campus in an old convertible.
86
00:05:26,459 --> 00:05:28,950
- Maybe a GTO or something.
- Think so? l could do that?
87
00:05:29,028 --> 00:05:34,159
Yes. lt's a well-known fact that driving
a muscle car makes you look younger.
88
00:05:36,202 --> 00:05:37,965
Well, you only go around once.
89
00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:41,199
lf you had a fast car you could
go around two, three times.
90
00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:43,502
[horn honking]
91
00:05:44,110 --> 00:05:46,670
l don't understand
why we have to come to a car lot.
92
00:05:46,746 --> 00:05:48,475
l found a bunch of cars in this paper.
93
00:05:48,548 --> 00:05:50,846
We'll get to these.
l want you to meet my car guy.
94
00:05:50,917 --> 00:05:53,283
He only deals
in real high-quality stuff.
95
00:05:53,386 --> 00:05:55,411
- Timmy.
- Jerry.
96
00:05:55,488 --> 00:05:57,547
- Timmy.
- Jerry.
97
00:05:58,658 --> 00:05:59,784
Jilly.
98
00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:01,918
- This is Jerry. My wife.
- Nice to meet you.
99
00:06:01,994 --> 00:06:03,757
l knew you had a good-looking Mustang.
100
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:07,390
l didn't realize you had
such a good-looking wife.
101
00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:09,298
We're here to look at cars, Jerry.
102
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,735
- Yeah.
- l'm looking for a convertible.
103
00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:14,102
- Maybe a muscle car.
- l don't want a muscle car.
104
00:06:14,173 --> 00:06:18,405
Oh, come on. Show her the Shelby.
Just take a look at it, please.
105
00:06:18,478 --> 00:06:20,639
[Jerry] lt's a beauty.
106
00:06:20,747 --> 00:06:24,239
- lt's got a 351 Windsor...
- A Windsor!
107
00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:26,751
...automatic transmission.
108
00:06:26,819 --> 00:06:29,379
lt's got a new convertible top
on there...
109
00:06:29,455 --> 00:06:31,719
l don't like the door handles.
That one is cute.
110
00:06:31,791 --> 00:06:33,759
The door han...?
Cute?
111
00:06:33,860 --> 00:06:37,159
Honey, we're buying a car, not a kitten.
112
00:06:37,964 --> 00:06:40,831
Well, if you're looking
for something that purrs,
113
00:06:41,467 --> 00:06:44,129
Tim, the '69 El Camino.
114
00:06:44,203 --> 00:06:46,637
l've driven this.
Great. lt's perfect for you.
115
00:06:46,706 --> 00:06:48,571
Half car, half truck.
116
00:06:48,641 --> 00:06:50,074
We could put her into this.
117
00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:52,043
You're not putting me into anything.
118
00:06:52,111 --> 00:06:55,012
- What happened to the convertible?
- You're gonna love this.
119
00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:57,515
lt's got it all.
lt's got a built 327...
120
00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:59,710
- Built 327!
- lt's four-speed.
121
00:06:59,786 --> 00:07:01,617
- Four-speed.
- Posit traction.
122
00:07:01,687 --> 00:07:06,249
Posit traction!
But, Jerry, the price is a little hefty.
123
00:07:07,026 --> 00:07:08,288
What can we do about that?
124
00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:11,194
Tim, they're numbers.
They mean nothing.
125
00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:13,425
Hello? Remember me?
lt's my car.
126
00:07:13,533 --> 00:07:15,899
Back up. l'm making a big deal here.
127
00:07:16,803 --> 00:07:18,327
All right, bottom line.
128
00:07:19,238 --> 00:07:21,263
l could take $900 off the sticker, Tim.
129
00:07:21,340 --> 00:07:24,639
- l'm not making a dime.
- True, 'cause l don't want this car.
130
00:07:26,479 --> 00:07:29,642
That's exactly how to play it.
You get the best deal that way.
131
00:07:29,749 --> 00:07:32,513
All right.
l'll throw in a set of new tires.
132
00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:37,244
- l don't want the car.
- Free undercoating.
133
00:07:39,225 --> 00:07:41,318
You got him right where you want him.
134
00:07:41,394 --> 00:07:44,761
Have you heard one word l've said?
l want to choose my own car!
135
00:07:44,864 --> 00:07:47,958
- And l do not want that car!
- l think you've done enough.
136
00:07:48,034 --> 00:07:50,901
l must have been insane to think
l could take you car shopping.
137
00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:53,461
- Jill.
- Save it, Timmy. Good-bye, Jerry.
138
00:07:53,539 --> 00:07:56,235
She's killin' me.
All right, LoJack.
139
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:58,072
- LoJack!
- Yeah.
140
00:07:58,177 --> 00:08:00,304
- [car engine starts]
- [tires screeching]
141
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:04,283
Hey, Mom.
Did you and Dad buy a new car?
142
00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:08,876
No. l bought a car.
Your father doesn't know about it yet.
143
00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:10,786
You bought a car all by yourself?
144
00:08:13,392 --> 00:08:16,486
- Without Dad?
- You trying to kill him or something?
145
00:08:18,598 --> 00:08:20,657
No, l'm not trying to kill him.
146
00:08:20,733 --> 00:08:24,260
He'll suffer for a little while
but he'll get over it.
147
00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:26,237
All right. Who gets custody of us?
148
00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:29,769
l think you'll want to go with me
149
00:08:29,842 --> 00:08:32,310
when you see the new sports car
in the garage.
150
00:08:32,378 --> 00:08:33,743
Cool.
151
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:39,280
- Hi.
- [mocking] Hi.
152
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:42,347
Thanks for leaving me at the car lot.
153
00:08:43,089 --> 00:08:45,751
Luckily, Jerry gave me a ride to work.
154
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:49,386
Al was nice enough to drive me home
at his typical 1 5 miles per hour.
155
00:08:51,163 --> 00:08:54,064
l'm sorry, l shouldn't have done that.
l was angry.
156
00:08:54,767 --> 00:08:56,735
l was the one that got carried away.
157
00:08:57,236 --> 00:09:00,933
Your the one whose aunt died.
l shouldn't have spoiled your fun.
158
00:09:03,576 --> 00:09:06,136
You were buying the car.
You should pick it out.
159
00:09:06,245 --> 00:09:08,213
Well, l'm glad you feel that way.
160
00:09:08,314 --> 00:09:12,842
Just drive a lot of them, test them out
and l'll stay out of the whole picture.
161
00:09:12,919 --> 00:09:14,614
Mom, you bought a great car.
162
00:09:18,090 --> 00:09:20,217
You bought a car without me?
163
00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:22,056
Yeah, and it's really cool.
164
00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:23,890
We're moving in with her.
165
00:09:27,366 --> 00:09:29,391
l can't believe
you bought a car without me.
166
00:09:29,468 --> 00:09:31,197
Did you buy that stupid Alfa?
167
00:09:31,270 --> 00:09:34,535
No, but l think you're really gonna like
the one that l did get.
168
00:09:38,778 --> 00:09:40,507
lt's British!
169
00:09:43,649 --> 00:09:46,311
lt's a '67 Austin-Healey.
170
00:09:46,385 --> 00:09:48,148
l know what the heck it is!
171
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:50,222
l don't know anything
about British cars.
172
00:09:50,289 --> 00:09:52,120
That was a big selling point.
173
00:09:54,860 --> 00:09:57,624
These things require
constant attention, honey.
174
00:09:57,697 --> 00:10:00,257
Yeah, l know. l thought
l could learn about the car,
175
00:10:00,366 --> 00:10:03,199
- and do some of the work myself.
- [laughing]
176
00:10:08,140 --> 00:10:12,975
Ooh, boy. These have a positive ground
wiring system that nobody understands.
177
00:10:13,045 --> 00:10:15,809
Don't get me started
on side draft carburetors.
178
00:10:15,881 --> 00:10:17,405
This... lt's a shocker.
179
00:10:17,483 --> 00:10:19,178
l don't know what to say.
180
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:25,785
How about saying that you're really
happy that l got the car l wanted?
181
00:10:29,261 --> 00:10:31,229
All right.
182
00:10:31,330 --> 00:10:33,855
l... l... lt's British!
183
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,198
These people made a fighter plane
out of wood!
184
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:41,398
- Tim.
- They put kidneys in pies!
185
00:10:43,376 --> 00:10:46,106
What does any of that
have to do with my car?
186
00:10:46,178 --> 00:10:47,338
Well...
187
00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:50,214
l don't understand these kind of cars.
188
00:10:50,282 --> 00:10:53,445
So you won't understand it.
How do we know you didn't get a lemon?
189
00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:56,977
No. l had it checked out
by a British mechanic.
190
00:10:57,056 --> 00:11:00,116
A British mechanic?
What did he say, it was ducky?
191
00:11:00,192 --> 00:11:03,218
Nigel went over this car
bumper to bumper.
192
00:11:03,295 --> 00:11:06,264
He said it was in great mechanical shape
and l got a great deal.
193
00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:09,563
- Can l have the keys, please?
- What for?
194
00:11:09,635 --> 00:11:13,332
l want to take it for a little drive and
see what kind of trouble you're in.
195
00:11:13,406 --> 00:11:17,308
You put down my car.
You put me down for buying my car.
196
00:11:17,376 --> 00:11:18,934
You expect me to hand over the keys
197
00:11:19,045 --> 00:11:21,172
so you can tell me
what else is wrong with it?
198
00:11:21,247 --> 00:11:23,181
lt's a thought.
199
00:11:23,716 --> 00:11:25,013
Well, think about this.
200
00:11:25,084 --> 00:11:28,110
l don't want you to drive my car
l don't want you to ride in my car.
201
00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:30,849
l don't want you anywhere near my car!
202
00:11:32,058 --> 00:11:35,186
So, l suppose putting it on the rack
is out of the question.
203
00:11:39,398 --> 00:11:41,730
l'll fix my own dinner.
204
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:49,598
[car horn honking]
205
00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:52,337
That's my carpool.
l should be back around 1 0:00.
206
00:11:52,411 --> 00:11:54,572
OK. l got everything under control here.
207
00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:58,182
[thinking] She's leaving her keys
to the Healey.
208
00:12:00,486 --> 00:12:02,613
Make sure the boys do their homework.
209
00:12:02,688 --> 00:12:05,521
- And don't try to help them.
- Don't worry about that.
210
00:12:07,026 --> 00:12:09,859
I could just check it out.
211
00:12:09,929 --> 00:12:12,090
But I gotta have it back
before 10:00.
212
00:12:12,631 --> 00:12:14,895
- You have a good time, OK?
- l will.
213
00:12:14,967 --> 00:12:17,697
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
214
00:12:17,770 --> 00:12:20,136
Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
215
00:12:28,881 --> 00:12:30,849
Oh, no.
216
00:12:33,018 --> 00:12:35,043
There's a new car in my garage.
217
00:12:35,121 --> 00:12:38,887
And I'm not allowed to drive it.
I'm in Tim Taylor hell.
218
00:12:43,896 --> 00:12:45,989
It does have
a nice looking body on this.
219
00:12:46,065 --> 00:12:47,760
Good curves.
220
00:12:47,833 --> 00:12:51,792
I've had a lot of vehicles in my time,
French, German, Italiano.
221
00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,434
But never British.
222
00:12:58,144 --> 00:13:00,078
Fits me like a glove.
223
00:13:01,213 --> 00:13:04,546
Nice feel on the clutch.
Short throw on the gearbox.
224
00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:06,482
I gotta drive this car.
225
00:13:06,552 --> 00:13:09,077
If I only had the keys.
226
00:13:10,923 --> 00:13:12,823
Then I wouldn't have to hotwire it.
227
00:13:15,928 --> 00:13:17,657
What am I talking about?
228
00:13:17,730 --> 00:13:20,198
What kind of guy hotwires
his wife's car?
229
00:13:21,567 --> 00:13:23,262
A guy like me.
230
00:13:29,708 --> 00:13:31,073
What are you doing?
231
00:13:35,581 --> 00:13:37,515
l thought Mom said not to touch her car.
232
00:13:37,583 --> 00:13:39,312
She'll be glad l did.
233
00:13:39,385 --> 00:13:43,617
l'm just checking out the wire, making
sure there's no loose connections.
234
00:13:43,689 --> 00:13:46,055
You're hotwiring Mom's car, aren't you?
235
00:13:47,693 --> 00:13:49,456
l'm bypassing the ignition.
236
00:13:49,528 --> 00:13:53,658
What kind of a twisted human being
hotwires his wife's car?
237
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:56,494
You guys are old enough
to know the truth.
238
00:13:56,602 --> 00:13:59,537
Your father is a sick, sick man.
239
00:14:01,874 --> 00:14:03,842
[engine starts]
240
00:14:08,247 --> 00:14:10,010
[tires squealing]
241
00:14:10,115 --> 00:14:11,946
[Tim thinking] It handles great.
242
00:14:12,017 --> 00:14:13,575
Smooth acceleration.
243
00:14:13,652 --> 00:14:15,381
This is wonderful.
244
00:14:17,656 --> 00:14:18,987
This is fab.
245
00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:21,424
Blimey, I'm falling for a Brit.
246
00:14:22,428 --> 00:14:26,194
Just got to get this car home by 10:00
or I'm in big trouble with her mom.
247
00:14:36,308 --> 00:14:39,334
Why do they have to
do road construction tonight?
248
00:14:41,914 --> 00:14:43,541
[horn honking]
249
00:14:44,683 --> 00:14:48,050
What are you honking at me for?
l'm not the one repaving the road?
250
00:14:48,153 --> 00:14:49,984
[man] l love Tool Time.
251
00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:58,359
[car door closes]
252
00:14:59,565 --> 00:15:01,533
[panting]
253
00:15:06,605 --> 00:15:09,301
- Nine fifty-nine. ls she back?
- Nope.
254
00:15:09,375 --> 00:15:13,038
- lt's your lucky night.
- Not your best hair night, however.
255
00:15:15,347 --> 00:15:17,212
Here she comes.
Act natural.
256
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,407
Dad, your hair.
257
00:15:20,853 --> 00:15:23,788
- Hey, how was school?
- Long and boring.
258
00:15:23,856 --> 00:15:25,221
Why are you holding your head?
259
00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:28,555
Married to me for 1 7 years,
you're asking why l'm holding my head?
260
00:15:33,866 --> 00:15:35,424
Morning.
261
00:15:36,101 --> 00:15:37,932
You're making breakfast.
262
00:15:38,003 --> 00:15:39,732
Yeah.
263
00:15:39,805 --> 00:15:44,367
Your favorite, egg white omelet
with shiatsu mushrooms.
264
00:15:45,978 --> 00:15:48,105
l gotta say you're taking
this car thing well.
265
00:15:48,180 --> 00:15:50,705
l thought not driving the Healey
would make you crazy.
266
00:15:50,783 --> 00:15:53,650
Come on. Give me more credit than that.
267
00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:56,652
You don't want me driving it.
268
00:15:56,722 --> 00:15:59,623
l'm mature enough
to respect your wishes.
269
00:15:59,692 --> 00:16:01,125
Thank you.
270
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,896
Hey, Mark, hand me the sports section.
271
00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:07,262
- Here you go.
- l don't believe it.
272
00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:09,267
Lions won?
273
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:27,980
Does anybody have the Metro section?
l want to look at the weather.
274
00:16:28,087 --> 00:16:30,248
Uh, we didn't get one today.
275
00:16:32,291 --> 00:16:34,816
l'm predicting cold with patchy fog.
276
00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:39,062
We always get one.
lt's between classified and sports.
277
00:16:44,803 --> 00:16:46,668
But we didn't get one today, honey.
278
00:16:48,540 --> 00:16:50,405
[Tim] Oh, wow. What...
279
00:16:54,413 --> 00:16:56,244
Why are you hiding the paper?
280
00:16:56,315 --> 00:16:59,182
- l'm not hiding the paper.
- Yes, you are.
281
00:16:59,251 --> 00:17:02,084
l'm trying to protect you from
all the bad news in this world.
282
00:17:02,154 --> 00:17:04,645
- Oh, my God, it's you.
- A lovely picture, isn't it?
283
00:17:07,326 --> 00:17:09,351
You're in my car.
284
00:17:09,428 --> 00:17:11,396
But l had the keys.
How did you...?
285
00:17:12,264 --> 00:17:14,425
You hotwired my car?
286
00:17:17,202 --> 00:17:20,433
Mom, go easy on him.
He's a sick, sick man.
287
00:17:23,242 --> 00:17:24,800
Boys, out.
288
00:17:27,346 --> 00:17:28,870
Tim, in.
289
00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:33,880
You know, it...
Just settle down, would you please?
290
00:17:33,952 --> 00:17:37,251
lt possibly was bad judgment on my part
to borrow the car.
291
00:17:37,322 --> 00:17:39,688
You didn't borrow the car.
You stole the car.
292
00:17:39,792 --> 00:17:43,888
Stealing, borrowing... Wait,
that omelet is getting very cold.
293
00:17:43,962 --> 00:17:46,590
lf you were a stranger
l would have you arrested.
294
00:17:46,665 --> 00:17:49,566
Careful with that.
lt's a very good picture of me.
295
00:17:49,635 --> 00:17:51,967
Try pepper or salsa.
lt will make it zesty.
296
00:17:52,037 --> 00:17:55,700
Tim, this whole gift from my aunt
was supposed to be fun.
297
00:17:56,375 --> 00:17:58,275
But from the minute
l decided to buy a car,
298
00:17:58,343 --> 00:18:01,710
you have done nothing but suck the fun
out of the whole thing.
299
00:18:01,814 --> 00:18:04,180
Thank you for nothing!
300
00:18:05,884 --> 00:18:08,375
l could heat it up.
lt'll be as good as new.
301
00:18:12,491 --> 00:18:15,460
One day l'm gonna figure out
how to suck the leaves off the tree.
302
00:18:15,527 --> 00:18:16,824
[chuckling]
303
00:18:17,796 --> 00:18:20,822
- What are you doing over there?
- l'm providing sustenance
304
00:18:20,899 --> 00:18:23,333
for my Annelida terra firma.
305
00:18:23,402 --> 00:18:24,664
Huh?
306
00:18:25,471 --> 00:18:26,938
l'm feeding my worms.
307
00:18:27,005 --> 00:18:30,168
They like newspaper, huh?
Probably love the gardening section.
308
00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:33,642
Well, actually,
they seem to prefer the obituaries.
309
00:18:33,745 --> 00:18:35,679
[chuckling]
310
00:18:37,249 --> 00:18:38,978
Don't quit your day job.
311
00:18:41,186 --> 00:18:44,280
l'll be writing my obituary
if l can't patch things up with Jill.
312
00:18:44,356 --> 00:18:45,914
Uh-oh. What's wrong now?
313
00:18:46,024 --> 00:18:49,983
l promised her l wouldn't drive
her new Austin-Healey.
314
00:18:50,062 --> 00:18:54,328
W-Whoa. l thought l saw a picture of you
driving the Healey in the Metro section.
315
00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:57,597
So did she.
316
00:18:57,669 --> 00:19:00,695
l can't figure it out.
l get near her car, l take over.
317
00:19:00,772 --> 00:19:03,002
Uh-huh. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
318
00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:06,977
Same thing happened when Harry bought
his truck and Al bought his Gremlin.
319
00:19:07,045 --> 00:19:08,342
l love cars.
320
00:19:08,413 --> 00:19:11,143
Maybe you shouldn't love
other people's cars so much.
321
00:19:11,950 --> 00:19:13,315
That's my problem.
322
00:19:13,385 --> 00:19:15,444
l'm a man who loves too much.
323
00:19:17,856 --> 00:19:19,915
My love is hurting other people.
324
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:24,361
So, l think you should apologize to all
the people you've wronged automotivally.
325
00:19:24,429 --> 00:19:26,363
That could take years.
326
00:19:26,431 --> 00:19:27,955
Start with Jill.
327
00:19:28,033 --> 00:19:30,001
That could take years.
328
00:19:37,309 --> 00:19:41,075
- Hi, how was school?
- Fine, but the drive was better.
329
00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:44,178
Can l talk to you for a minute?
330
00:19:44,249 --> 00:19:46,376
Tim, l'm really tired, honey.
331
00:19:46,451 --> 00:19:49,887
This is really important, please.
Just for a second. Come on.
332
00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:56,026
OK. What?
333
00:19:56,094 --> 00:19:57,254
Sit down.
334
00:19:57,329 --> 00:19:59,661
l didn't mean to steamroll you
and ruin your fun.
335
00:19:59,731 --> 00:20:02,291
The truth is, l have the problem.
336
00:20:03,402 --> 00:20:06,166
- l'm addicted to cars.
- Well, duh.
337
00:20:09,741 --> 00:20:14,235
l want to apologize for all the times
l've wronged you automotivally.
338
00:20:14,313 --> 00:20:16,076
That could take years.
339
00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:19,677
That's why we've got to start.
Just listen.
340
00:20:19,751 --> 00:20:20,911
All right.
341
00:20:21,019 --> 00:20:23,283
Your birthday, 1 975.
342
00:20:24,456 --> 00:20:28,017
Remember you wanted earrings?
l bought you that chrome dipstick.
343
00:20:29,027 --> 00:20:31,757
Valentine's Day, 1 976.
344
00:20:31,830 --> 00:20:35,197
You wanted earrings,
l got you a case of transmission fluid.
345
00:20:36,435 --> 00:20:38,266
Our wedding, 1 979.
346
00:20:38,337 --> 00:20:40,271
l insisted on the hot rod theme.
347
00:20:40,339 --> 00:20:44,070
Remember the three-barrel Stromberg
wedding cake? lt was a big hit.
348
00:20:44,142 --> 00:20:46,633
- Christmas, 1 980.
- Tim.
349
00:20:47,212 --> 00:20:49,237
How do you remember all these dates?
350
00:20:49,314 --> 00:20:51,009
lt's part of my car sickness.
351
00:20:55,454 --> 00:20:57,115
l need help.
352
00:20:58,223 --> 00:21:01,249
l'm thinking of checking in
to the Henry Ford Clinic.
353
00:21:09,968 --> 00:21:11,629
Here, just...
354
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:15,832
- You bought me flowers.
- Well, not exactly.
355
00:21:19,411 --> 00:21:20,742
The Club?
356
00:21:32,190 --> 00:21:33,680
Ready to go to dinner?
357
00:21:33,759 --> 00:21:35,124
Yeah.
358
00:21:35,193 --> 00:21:37,218
- Wanna go in the Healey?
- Oh, yeah.
359
00:21:38,664 --> 00:21:40,529
Well, you've earned it.
360
00:21:40,599 --> 00:21:44,558
lt's been two weeks and you've stayed
away from my car without one relapse.
361
00:21:44,636 --> 00:21:45,796
lt wasn't easy.
362
00:21:45,871 --> 00:21:47,771
Every time l was tempted
l visualized
363
00:21:47,839 --> 00:21:50,774
Margaret Thatcher eating a kidney pie
in a thong.
364
00:21:56,114 --> 00:21:58,674
lt's a big night, the first time
l've ridden in this car
365
00:21:58,784 --> 00:22:00,945
without starting it with a screwdriver.
366
00:22:01,019 --> 00:22:02,782
- Shall we?
- We shall.
367
00:22:02,854 --> 00:22:04,321
Yes.
368
00:22:05,691 --> 00:22:07,158
Tim.
369
00:22:07,225 --> 00:22:09,659
l was opening the door for you, hon.
370
00:22:11,096 --> 00:22:12,461
Thank you.
371
00:22:13,305 --> 00:22:19,851
Please rate this subtitle at %url%
Help other users to choose the best subtitles
29285
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.