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1
00:00:05,672 --> 00:00:07,367
- Hi!
- Hi there.
2
00:00:07,440 --> 00:00:10,967
Did you get my spaghetti made?
l have to make it to that potluck...
3
00:00:11,044 --> 00:00:13,103
Oh, my God! What is that?
4
00:00:13,179 --> 00:00:18,549
That is the Binford 61 00
Commercial Vacu-Hood.
5
00:00:18,618 --> 00:00:22,349
The residential version only has
a one-horsepower blower motor.
6
00:00:22,422 --> 00:00:25,391
This bad boy has ten horsepower.
What do you think?
7
00:00:25,458 --> 00:00:26,823
- lmpressive.
- Thanks.
8
00:00:26,893 --> 00:00:28,656
- Take it down.
- (laughs)
9
00:00:28,728 --> 00:00:33,290
- You don't even know what you have here.
- l asked you for a simple little exhaust fan.
10
00:00:33,366 --> 00:00:40,329
Well, this simple little exhaust fan will suck
20,000 cubic feet of stinky air a minute.
11
00:00:41,374 --> 00:00:43,433
Take it down.
12
00:00:43,510 --> 00:00:45,239
You want stinky air?
13
00:00:45,311 --> 00:00:49,680
l live with it in the bedroom.
l can live with it in the kitchen.
14
00:00:51,251 --> 00:00:53,412
(whirring)
15
00:01:01,728 --> 00:01:05,721
- What was that?
- Uh... Just... just testing it out.
16
00:01:05,799 --> 00:01:09,235
Where's my spaghetti?
l have to take it to Ypsilanti!
17
00:01:09,302 --> 00:01:11,668
lt's probably already there.
18
00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:13,968
Oh, man!
19
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:21,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.SubtitleDB.org today
20
00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:10,426
Hey. You know my parents don't like you
coming here when l'm studying.
21
00:02:10,497 --> 00:02:15,127
Just thought you'd like to know - big party
at Lisa Beldon's on Saturday night.
22
00:02:15,201 --> 00:02:18,170
l can't go. l have to study
for history finals all weekend.
23
00:02:18,238 --> 00:02:22,868
Not necessarily. You're talking to someone
that can get you a preview copy of that test.
24
00:02:22,942 --> 00:02:25,376
- Really?
- lt's my final exam clearance sale.
25
00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:29,074
Everything must go. The deals are insane.
26
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:32,676
- What if my parents find out?
- The parents never find out.
27
00:02:32,752 --> 00:02:36,210
l deliver late at night
and slip it under the door.
28
00:02:36,289 --> 00:02:37,654
Hey, Brad.
29
00:02:37,724 --> 00:02:43,060
Some of that spaghetti got all the way
across the street into Doc Johnson's Buick.
30
00:02:43,129 --> 00:02:45,597
- Hi, Mr. Taylor.
- Hello, Jason.
31
00:02:45,665 --> 00:02:48,099
Brad, we talked about Jason coming over.
32
00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:51,626
l didn't come to see Brad.
Came to see you!
33
00:02:53,273 --> 00:02:54,763
- ls that a fact, Jason?
- Yeah.
34
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:59,073
l just wanted to ask your advice on power
tools. l'm thinking of buying my first one.
35
00:02:59,145 --> 00:03:00,737
Really? What kind?
36
00:03:00,813 --> 00:03:04,977
- A seven-and-a-quarter-inch circular saw.
- Really?
37
00:03:05,685 --> 00:03:08,153
Yeah. Something with a combination blade.
38
00:03:08,221 --> 00:03:11,088
All right! That's good for crosscutting
and rip-cutting.
39
00:03:11,157 --> 00:03:14,957
But you want to get yourself a fine-tooth
finish blade for precise cuts.
40
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:18,122
- Stainless steel?
- l'd go with the carbide tip.
41
00:03:19,065 --> 00:03:21,056
Thank you.
42
00:03:22,168 --> 00:03:27,162
Well, l gotta get home and watch today's
Tool Time l tape 'em all.
43
00:03:28,408 --> 00:03:31,707
Don't be such a stranger around here,
Jason.
44
00:03:31,778 --> 00:03:35,373
Boy, oh, boy. l love that kid.
45
00:03:36,749 --> 00:03:39,479
- There's a policeman in Wilson's yard.
- l see.
46
00:03:39,552 --> 00:03:42,419
l hope everything's all right.
Stay here, please.
47
00:03:42,488 --> 00:03:45,116
(dispatch voice)
48
00:03:45,258 --> 00:03:46,555
Oh.
49
00:03:47,527 --> 00:03:49,791
(whistles)
50
00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:55,165
- Wilson, what happened?
- Well, Tim, l'm afraid l had a break-in.
51
00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:57,066
- Are you all right?
- l'm shook up.
52
00:03:57,136 --> 00:04:00,071
Luckily l wasn't here when it happened.
This is Officer Guidry.
53
00:04:00,139 --> 00:04:02,437
Officer, this is my neighbor, Tim Taylor.
54
00:04:02,508 --> 00:04:05,500
- How are you doing?
- Oh, yeah. l've seen your show.
55
00:04:05,578 --> 00:04:09,480
- lt's always nice to meet a fan.
- Who said l was a fan?
56
00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:15,219
Boy! l cannot believe this happened. They
took some of my most valued possessions.
57
00:04:15,288 --> 00:04:19,384
- What'd they get? A TV? Stereo?
- No, no, no. Much worse than that.
58
00:04:19,459 --> 00:04:23,520
Number one,
they took my cheek extender from Fiji.
59
00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:26,827
Number two,
they took my stuffed cow's hoof.
60
00:04:26,899 --> 00:04:29,459
But the thing that really
makes me feel violated is
61
00:04:29,535 --> 00:04:32,163
they took my African mucous cup.
62
00:04:35,008 --> 00:04:37,636
They always take the good stuff.
63
00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:43,048
How am l gonna write this up? l mean,
what's an African mucous cup worth?
64
00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:48,452
Well, not much here in Detroit. But in Africa
you can get six goats and a virgin.
65
00:04:53,092 --> 00:04:55,560
- Hey, Marty. Hey, Harry.
- Hey, Tim.
66
00:04:55,628 --> 00:04:57,118
- Benny.
- Hey, Tim.
67
00:04:57,196 --> 00:05:01,098
Just how l love my coffee - poured
by somebody else. Thank you, Ben.
68
00:05:01,167 --> 00:05:03,067
- Hi, Tim.
- Hey, Al.
69
00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:07,232
Hey, guys. Hear the news?
Wilson was robbed today.
70
00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:08,672
- Really?
- Oh, no!
71
00:05:08,741 --> 00:05:11,938
- ls he all right?
- Well, you know, physically, yeah.
72
00:05:12,011 --> 00:05:15,071
l hope they didn't get his mucous cup.
73
00:05:17,684 --> 00:05:20,278
What the hell is a mucous cup?
74
00:05:20,353 --> 00:05:26,451
lt's an earthenware goblet from Africa that's
used as a spittoon for excess phlegm.
75
00:05:27,226 --> 00:05:30,457
You sure seem to know a lot
about a mucous cup.
76
00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:33,397
Were you on the crime scene
eleven or so this morning?
77
00:05:33,466 --> 00:05:34,558
Yeah, Al.
78
00:05:34,634 --> 00:05:40,038
Everybody knows you always dreamed
of owning a complete set of mucous-ware.
79
00:05:41,341 --> 00:05:44,640
No matter how much l covet a mucous cup,
l would never steal one.
80
00:05:44,711 --> 00:05:48,203
Hey, Tim. Didn't Wilson have
a security system or something?
81
00:05:48,281 --> 00:05:49,270
l don't think so.
82
00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:54,377
l have the best security system
in the world - l own nothing of value.
83
00:05:54,454 --> 00:05:58,015
Hey, l got an even better one.
My wife Delores.
84
00:05:58,091 --> 00:06:03,324
Burglar takes a look at her
with no makeup, he's scared straight.
85
00:06:03,396 --> 00:06:07,355
- You know, l don't have a security system.
- (Marty) Huh.
86
00:06:07,433 --> 00:06:12,302
Hey! Maybe it's time the Tool Man
had his own security system.
87
00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:15,432
Oh, boy!
l've been waiting for this day a long time.
88
00:06:15,508 --> 00:06:17,373
All right, all right, all right.
89
00:06:17,443 --> 00:06:20,469
- Tim buying an alarm system? Ka-ching.
- Yeah.
90
00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:24,539
This is gonna be good.
The Tim Taylor High-Security Compound.
91
00:06:24,617 --> 00:06:28,678
lt's gonna be the only home
with first-strike capability.
92
00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:29,744
What do you got?
93
00:06:29,822 --> 00:06:33,758
A surveillance camera
with ultrasensitive microphones.
94
00:06:33,826 --> 00:06:35,453
- Let me have a dozen.
- All right.
95
00:06:35,528 --> 00:06:37,553
You need a master pad
to tie that system together.
96
00:06:37,630 --> 00:06:40,428
- Get that.
- And get those infrared motion sensors.
97
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:43,560
- They're over here.
- 1 44 of those. A gross, make it.
98
00:06:43,636 --> 00:06:45,968
- Don't forget the siren.
- Get me a couple sirens.
99
00:06:46,038 --> 00:06:50,134
Lights. l'll pull the big truck around front.
We'll load up. Where are the keys?
100
00:06:50,209 --> 00:06:54,441
This will be the biggest thing you've done,
bigger than the hood vent in the kitchen.
101
00:06:54,514 --> 00:06:56,106
Oh, way bigger! Whoa, whoa.
102
00:06:56,182 --> 00:06:58,377
Why did you bring that up?
103
00:06:58,451 --> 00:07:01,716
- Wait a minute. What's wrong?
- Jill made me take that thing out.
104
00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:05,417
And l promised her l wouldn't go overboard
in any other installations.
105
00:07:05,491 --> 00:07:07,959
What are you saying, Tim?
106
00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:15,090
l'm saying it's probably a better idea
to just go with a basic unit.
107
00:07:18,037 --> 00:07:20,631
Yeah. The chances of that happening!
108
00:07:20,706 --> 00:07:25,268
Guys, l'm serious. l'm serious. l think it's
time the Tool Man just scaled back a bit.
109
00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:29,576
Yeah, right.
That would be like Babe Ruth bunting.
110
00:07:29,649 --> 00:07:32,209
Raquel Welch wearing a parka.
111
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:34,651
Benny picking up a check.
112
00:07:35,755 --> 00:07:40,385
lt would be like my mother going
to a buffet and only having a salad.
113
00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:44,753
Did l say that?
114
00:07:47,366 --> 00:07:48,355
- Hi.
- Aah!
115
00:07:48,434 --> 00:07:49,992
Aah!
116
00:07:51,704 --> 00:07:53,433
- Why were we yelling?
- l'm sorry.
117
00:07:53,506 --> 00:07:55,974
l'm just a little jumpy.
Wilson got robbed.
118
00:07:56,042 --> 00:07:58,772
That's why l bought an alarm
for the house.
119
00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:01,405
- You did?
- Yes. But you'd be proud of me.
120
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:05,315
l got a base-down, stripped unit.
Bottom-of-the-line, very simple.
121
00:08:05,384 --> 00:08:10,321
- Bottom-of-the-line?
- Bottom-of-the-line. Almost an empty box.
122
00:08:10,389 --> 00:08:12,857
- What are you, crazy?
- What?
123
00:08:12,925 --> 00:08:15,860
Do you care nothing about your family?
124
00:08:19,198 --> 00:08:22,133
- What?
- Well, the kids are alone all the time now.
125
00:08:22,201 --> 00:08:25,932
Mark is terrified.
You come home with this toy?
126
00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:30,669
(stammering)
127
00:08:32,812 --> 00:08:33,801
(stammers)
128
00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:36,678
- Do you want something bigger?
- Yes! Yes!
129
00:08:36,749 --> 00:08:40,515
- l want something much, much bigger!
- Well, uh...
130
00:08:42,321 --> 00:08:45,222
Am l in the right house?
131
00:08:45,291 --> 00:08:48,658
Look, if this can happen to Wilson,
it can happen to us!
132
00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:51,595
l want floodlights, surveillance cameras,
uh, uh, uh...
133
00:08:51,664 --> 00:08:55,225
panic buttons, uh, uh,
the works, everything!
134
00:08:55,301 --> 00:09:00,534
You know, l am getting very excited.
l hope this isn't just a big tease.
135
00:09:05,177 --> 00:09:07,509
l am not teasing you.
136
00:09:07,580 --> 00:09:09,639
l am turning you loose
137
00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:15,244
to buy the biggest, most powerful
security system that money can buy.
138
00:09:15,321 --> 00:09:16,982
Ohh...
139
00:09:22,461 --> 00:09:27,194
l will even allow you
to do a Tool Time remote in the house.
140
00:09:31,037 --> 00:09:36,100
l have never loved you
as much as l do at this moment.
141
00:09:37,977 --> 00:09:39,672
Be back in a while.
142
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:48,277
lf l was to buy the answers to the test,
how much would it cost?
143
00:09:48,354 --> 00:09:51,050
For you? 30 bucks.
144
00:09:52,058 --> 00:09:55,255
30 bucks? l'm sorry. All l have is 20.
145
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:58,058
Did l say thir...? l meant 20.
146
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:02,863
- All right. l guess that's a deal.
- Now, remember...
147
00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:05,426
Under the door around midnight.
148
00:10:05,504 --> 00:10:06,937
Everybody this way.
149
00:10:07,006 --> 00:10:11,136
Why don't you bring it on down in the
family room? Over there by the fireplace.
150
00:10:11,210 --> 00:10:14,543
- Come on in. Let's go. Keep it moving.
- OK.
151
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,639
That's good.
152
00:10:18,684 --> 00:10:21,778
All right.
Hey, Jase. How's that new saw?
153
00:10:21,854 --> 00:10:24,550
Saw? Oh, just fine. Very...
154
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:26,251
sharp.
155
00:10:27,593 --> 00:10:30,721
You guys have to get out of the room.
We're doing a Tool Time here.
156
00:10:30,796 --> 00:10:34,960
Wow. You're doing an actual Tool Time
right here in the house?
157
00:10:35,034 --> 00:10:37,400
- l bet you'd like to watch.
- l wish l could.
158
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:43,102
But finals are starting Monday.
And that's always a very hectic time for me.
159
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:47,275
Keep your nose to the grindstone.
160
00:10:47,346 --> 00:10:52,909
l will. And if l ever buy a grindstone,
l assure you it'll be a Binford.
161
00:10:59,358 --> 00:11:01,690
Does everybody know what time it is?
162
00:11:01,761 --> 00:11:03,854
Tool Time!
163
00:11:05,731 --> 00:11:09,827
That's right. Welcome to a very special
Tool Time live from the home of our star,
164
00:11:09,902 --> 00:11:12,063
Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor!
Whoo-hoo!
165
00:11:12,138 --> 00:11:14,129
(# ''Tool Time'' theme)
166
00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:17,308
Thank you, Heidi.
Welcome to Tool Time
167
00:11:17,376 --> 00:11:21,472
l am Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor.
And you all know my assistant, Al Borland.
168
00:11:21,547 --> 00:11:27,042
We're gonna show you how to install a
high-tech, super-charged security system.
169
00:11:27,119 --> 00:11:29,553
That's right.
The first thing is to determine
170
00:11:29,622 --> 00:11:33,649
what areas of your home
are most vulnerable to a break-in.
171
00:11:33,726 --> 00:11:38,288
But since the only thing Al can break into
is a sweat...
172
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:41,299
we've invited a reformed burglar
to help us out.
173
00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:46,669
l'd like to welcome on the show,
Sammy ''the Snake'' Nash.
174
00:11:46,739 --> 00:11:48,366
- Welcome, Sammy.
- Thanks.
175
00:11:48,441 --> 00:11:53,970
lt's a pleasure to be in your home.
You have some beautiful things in here.
176
00:11:55,147 --> 00:11:59,049
- And l'd like to keep them in here.
- l'm not into that anymore.
177
00:11:59,118 --> 00:12:03,487
Good. Because l understand your parole
officer watches the show every night.
178
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:06,923
All right. Well, Sammy,
where would you like to begin?
179
00:12:06,992 --> 00:12:09,790
With the obvious, Al. The front door.
180
00:12:09,862 --> 00:12:13,696
l'll step outside. You lock it up.
And we'll see just how secure it is.
181
00:12:13,766 --> 00:12:17,099
OK. Great. Good. Great. Fine.
182
00:12:17,803 --> 00:12:21,170
l think the old Samster's in
for a little surprise.
183
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:24,801
That's a solid oak door. l installed
a rim-proof, jimmy-proof lock,
184
00:12:24,877 --> 00:12:27,846
which l call pretty much impenetrable.
185
00:12:29,615 --> 00:12:33,278
Pretty much. Unless you're foolish enough
not to use the deadbolt.
186
00:12:33,352 --> 00:12:35,684
Then someone could open it
with a credit card.
187
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:38,383
Well, good way to wreck your credit card.
188
00:12:38,457 --> 00:12:40,721
Actually, l wrecked yours.
189
00:12:41,994 --> 00:12:44,189
All right. Hmm...
190
00:12:44,263 --> 00:12:49,496
Let's step out into the backyard and see if
there are any vulnerable places out there.
191
00:13:29,041 --> 00:13:31,635
(alarm sounds)
192
00:13:34,780 --> 00:13:38,409
You've watched us install one
of the most advanced security systems.
193
00:13:38,484 --> 00:13:42,420
Next, pick a secret password
and provide that to your security company.
194
00:13:42,488 --> 00:13:46,185
Pick a word that's easy to remember,
perhaps has a special meaning for you,
195
00:13:46,258 --> 00:13:48,226
like the name of a pet or a loved one.
196
00:13:48,294 --> 00:13:51,525
For instance, l picked ''saber saw.''
197
00:13:54,800 --> 00:14:00,705
Perhaps now you'd like to choose a word
that our viewing audience hasn't heard.
198
00:14:04,076 --> 00:14:06,374
Perhaps.
199
00:14:06,445 --> 00:14:12,543
And for all you criminals out there, it might
not be another tool. lt might be a car.
200
00:14:14,253 --> 00:14:16,847
- See you next time on Tool Time
- Bye now.
201
00:14:16,922 --> 00:14:18,913
(# ''Tool Time'' theme)
202
00:14:19,725 --> 00:14:22,819
OK, let's move it out.
Take that belt. You guys move it.
203
00:14:22,895 --> 00:14:25,591
Get it back to the studio
so we can get it wrapped up.
204
00:14:25,664 --> 00:14:28,428
- See you in the morning.
- All right, buddy. Thanks.
205
00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:31,060
- We're all set.
- Great. Show me how it works.
206
00:14:31,136 --> 00:14:32,933
Now, this is the downstairs panel.
207
00:14:33,005 --> 00:14:36,964
You can operate the entire system
from this panel alone on simple 21 buttons.
208
00:14:37,042 --> 00:14:40,102
- 21 buttons.
- That's right. 21 buttons, 1 8 zones.
209
00:14:40,179 --> 00:14:42,647
21 buttons, 1 8 zones.
210
00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:44,342
That's right. lt's very simple.
211
00:14:44,416 --> 00:14:51,117
lf you want to leave the house and set the
system in gear, you press ''arm-command''
212
00:14:51,190 --> 00:14:55,217
''36824-star-7.''
213
00:14:55,294 --> 00:14:57,057
OK?
214
00:14:57,129 --> 00:14:59,689
All right now, if you're in the house
during the day
215
00:14:59,765 --> 00:15:02,893
and you do not want the motion sensors
on, which is a great idea -
216
00:15:02,968 --> 00:15:10,773
''arm-command-A3423423.''
217
00:15:10,843 --> 00:15:14,438
Simple, yeah? ''Star-bypass-pound-6.''
218
00:15:14,513 --> 00:15:16,538
(beeps)
219
00:15:17,416 --> 00:15:19,043
Are you with me so far?
220
00:15:19,118 --> 00:15:24,681
l lost you after you said,
''This is the downstairs panel.''
221
00:15:25,224 --> 00:15:27,818
Once you use it,
you'll find this very easy to use.
222
00:15:27,893 --> 00:15:31,090
OK. What if the motion sensors are on,
223
00:15:31,163 --> 00:15:33,825
but l want to go downstairs
to get something to eat?
224
00:15:33,899 --> 00:15:34,923
Um...
225
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,025
Well, you can't.
226
00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:41,831
- l can't? What am l supposed to do?
- What are you supposed to do? Oh.
227
00:15:41,907 --> 00:15:44,068
Keep a ham by the bed.
228
00:15:50,716 --> 00:15:58,020
l've almost got this. Before going to sleep
at night, l press ''arm-command-5863,''
229
00:15:58,090 --> 00:16:02,527
''perimeter-instant-2-star-4.''
230
00:16:02,594 --> 00:16:03,959
2-star-2!
231
00:16:04,029 --> 00:16:06,429
Oh, OK. ''2-star-2.''
232
00:16:06,498 --> 00:16:07,487
(beeps)
233
00:16:07,566 --> 00:16:09,864
(Tim coughing)
234
00:16:15,007 --> 00:16:18,238
l think l could use one
of those mucous cups.
235
00:16:19,411 --> 00:16:22,380
- l'll never be able to work this.
- You'll get it.
236
00:16:22,448 --> 00:16:25,110
There's one last security measure
we gotta do before bed.
237
00:16:25,184 --> 00:16:26,515
What?
238
00:16:26,585 --> 00:16:28,610
l'll have to frisk you.
239
00:16:32,091 --> 00:16:33,854
What's the password?
240
00:16:33,926 --> 00:16:36,087
''Please.''
241
00:16:58,817 --> 00:17:00,307
(alarm sounds)
242
00:17:00,386 --> 00:17:03,719
(recording) Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
243
00:17:03,789 --> 00:17:06,189
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
244
00:17:08,327 --> 00:17:10,921
- There's someone downstairs!
- Uh, uh...
245
00:17:10,996 --> 00:17:16,127
- Stay here. l'll go down there. l'll get him.
- Here, wait! Take this.
246
00:17:18,137 --> 00:17:21,538
What am l gonna do - style him to death?
247
00:17:23,142 --> 00:17:25,167
(Tim) Who's down there?
248
00:17:25,944 --> 00:17:28,970
Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
249
00:17:29,314 --> 00:17:32,215
Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
250
00:17:32,551 --> 00:17:35,384
Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
251
00:17:35,454 --> 00:17:38,787
- Dad!
- Brad! What are you doing down here?
252
00:17:38,857 --> 00:17:40,882
This thing's going crazy.
l can't turn it off.
253
00:17:40,959 --> 00:17:43,450
Honey, it's OK. lt's just Brad.
254
00:17:43,529 --> 00:17:46,259
''Disarm-command-disarm-8-7-disarm.''
255
00:17:46,331 --> 00:17:48,595
Look at that!
256
00:17:49,535 --> 00:17:52,163
Boy, that was loud.
257
00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:55,638
Relax. Why are you hugging yourself?
258
00:17:55,707 --> 00:17:58,141
lt... it just feels right.
259
00:17:59,845 --> 00:18:02,336
Everybody go back to bed.
The alarm won't go back on.
260
00:18:02,414 --> 00:18:04,348
All right.
261
00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:06,680
Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
262
00:18:06,985 --> 00:18:10,182
Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
263
00:18:10,255 --> 00:18:11,722
Get away from the house!
264
00:18:18,797 --> 00:18:20,788
(alarm sounds)
265
00:18:20,866 --> 00:18:22,959
The police are on their way!
266
00:18:23,035 --> 00:18:25,902
Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
267
00:18:26,238 --> 00:18:28,263
Get away from the house!
268
00:18:31,176 --> 00:18:32,768
(beeps)
269
00:18:48,494 --> 00:18:50,962
(sound of machine gunfire)
270
00:18:51,029 --> 00:18:52,963
The police are on their way!
271
00:18:53,031 --> 00:18:56,296
Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
272
00:18:56,568 --> 00:18:59,264
Get away from the house!
The police are on their way!
273
00:19:05,344 --> 00:19:06,971
Tim!
274
00:19:07,412 --> 00:19:09,175
(Tim) Don't panic!
275
00:19:09,248 --> 00:19:13,617
Oh, good God! How much longer
must l endure this madness?
276
00:19:13,685 --> 00:19:17,246
Bells and whistles and little men
popping up at all hours of the night?
277
00:19:17,322 --> 00:19:21,952
l am so sorry. l don't want to upset you.
You're the only neighbor speaking to us.
278
00:19:22,027 --> 00:19:25,758
Well, l am about one siren blast away
from going over to the other side.
279
00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:27,458
l'm about ready to join you.
280
00:19:27,533 --> 00:19:30,195
How could you let Tim put in
such a ridiculous alarm system?
281
00:19:30,269 --> 00:19:33,261
Well, it was actually my idea.
282
00:19:33,338 --> 00:19:35,238
- Your idea?
- Yeah.
283
00:19:35,307 --> 00:19:37,298
After you got robbed, l got scared.
284
00:19:37,376 --> 00:19:40,607
l started imaging horrible things
happening to the family.
285
00:19:40,679 --> 00:19:45,116
Crazy people lurking behind every door,
scaring the kids, taking all our stuff.
286
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:46,242
Mm-hmm.
287
00:19:46,318 --> 00:19:50,755
You thought that, with a state-of-the-art
alarm system, you'd no longer be afraid.
288
00:19:50,822 --> 00:19:54,952
Well, yeah. But now all l'm afraid of
is setting off this insane system!
289
00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:58,224
Well, Jill, l wouldn't worry about it.
290
00:19:59,798 --> 00:20:04,428
As the physicist Edward Teller told me
over borscht at the Russian Tea Room,
291
00:20:04,503 --> 00:20:09,099
total security has never been available
to anyone. To expect it is unrealistic.
292
00:20:09,174 --> 00:20:13,474
To imagine that it can exist
is an invite to disaster.
293
00:20:13,545 --> 00:20:17,504
Well, this week would qualify
as a complete disaster.
294
00:20:17,583 --> 00:20:19,551
l wish we could scale this thing back.
295
00:20:19,618 --> 00:20:22,951
But l can't ask him to do that
after he's put all this effort into it.
296
00:20:23,021 --> 00:20:25,012
Why don't you present him with a petition
297
00:20:25,090 --> 00:20:29,117
signed by all his neighbors
who are sleep-deprived?
298
00:20:29,194 --> 00:20:32,891
Wilson, you know nobody in this
neighborhood ever signs anything.
299
00:20:32,965 --> 00:20:36,025
Well, Jill, there's always a first time.
300
00:20:39,938 --> 00:20:44,034
All right, all right. l think
l've got the inside sensors figured out.
301
00:20:44,109 --> 00:20:45,371
- Hey, Wilson.
- Hey.
302
00:20:45,444 --> 00:20:46,433
What do you got?
303
00:20:46,511 --> 00:20:49,947
A petition from all the neighbors angry
about your security system.
304
00:20:50,015 --> 00:20:52,108
(mock laughter)
305
00:20:53,185 --> 00:20:56,279
Joe Paduro? That guy lives,
like, four blocks away.
306
00:20:56,355 --> 00:21:01,315
Well, l think he's still angry
about being hit by the spaghetti.
307
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:05,225
Tim, we gotta talk
about scaling this thing back.
308
00:21:05,297 --> 00:21:07,322
You know, this was partly your idea.
309
00:21:07,399 --> 00:21:09,833
l'll figure it out as soon
as l can get these motion detectors...
310
00:21:09,901 --> 00:21:11,892
(alarm sounds)
311
00:21:12,804 --> 00:21:14,135
Hey!
312
00:21:21,546 --> 00:21:23,639
Welcome back to Tool Time on location.
313
00:21:23,715 --> 00:21:27,583
Last week we showed you how to install
a state-of-the-art security system.
314
00:21:27,653 --> 00:21:30,952
Today we'll show you how
to install a more modest system.
315
00:21:31,023 --> 00:21:35,153
And for people whose neighbors
signed a huge petition.
316
00:21:37,396 --> 00:21:41,230
We eliminated 1 7 or 1 8 zones and went
with a much smaller control panel.
317
00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:45,202
Now we have only one security camera
situated over the front door.
318
00:21:45,270 --> 00:21:47,238
There you go. See that picture? Very nice.
319
00:21:47,306 --> 00:21:50,036
That's my son Brad
with a good friend, Jason.
320
00:21:50,108 --> 00:21:53,475
Jason just bought his first circular saw.
321
00:21:53,545 --> 00:21:58,141
- You want your money back?
- I decided not to cheat on the test
322
00:21:58,216 --> 00:22:01,310
- Why not?
- Well. first of all it's wrong
323
00:22:01,386 --> 00:22:03,547
And if my parents caught me.
they'd kill me
324
00:22:03,622 --> 00:22:06,113
They'd never catch on
specially your dad
325
00:22:06,191 --> 00:22:10,992
He still thinks l bought a saw
and that l tape Tool Time l mean...
326
00:22:11,830 --> 00:22:13,354
(Tim laughs)
327
00:22:13,432 --> 00:22:18,267
Well, you don't have to tape Tool
Time now, Jason, because you're on it live.
328
00:22:18,337 --> 00:22:21,568
And l'll be sending this tape to your folks.
329
00:22:22,941 --> 00:22:26,741
Did l mention l'm an orphan, sir?
330
00:22:30,816 --> 00:22:32,977
l think l love you no... mo...
331
00:22:34,853 --> 00:22:35,911
One more time.
332
00:22:35,987 --> 00:22:37,887
''l love you more at this moment than ever.''
333
00:22:37,956 --> 00:22:38,820
Something like that.
334
00:22:38,890 --> 00:22:41,415
''l've never loved you as much
as l do at this moment!''
335
00:22:41,493 --> 00:22:42,482
Here we go.
336
00:22:42,561 --> 00:22:45,894
Wow. You're... you're doing a Tool Time
right here in this house?
337
00:22:45,964 --> 00:22:48,228
Oh, yeah.
338
00:22:48,300 --> 00:22:49,528
Whew!
339
00:22:49,601 --> 00:22:51,466
Wow.
340
00:22:51,536 --> 00:22:53,970
That would be your line.
341
00:22:54,039 --> 00:22:56,030
Would it?
342
00:22:57,305 --> 00:23:03,534
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