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1
00:00:13,768 --> 00:00:17,567
♪ I love love ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
2
00:00:17,728 --> 00:00:20,807
♪ I don't care what it does to me ♪
3
00:00:20,968 --> 00:00:25,686
♪ Sing I love love ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
4
00:00:25,847 --> 00:00:29,166
♪ I don't care what it does to me ♪
5
00:00:45,046 --> 00:00:48,765
♪ I love love ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
6
00:00:48,926 --> 00:00:51,204
♪ I don't care what it does to me ♪
7
00:00:51,365 --> 00:00:56,085
♪ These pills are fine to pass the time ♪
♪ 'til I find my new drug ♪
8
00:00:56,246 --> 00:01:00,004
♪ We'll take our chances ♪
♪ we'll last a month ♪
9
00:01:00,165 --> 00:01:04,004
♪ We'll never speak again ♪
♪ How I love being in love ♪
10
00:01:04,165 --> 00:01:06,884
- May I help you?
- Huh? No.
11
00:01:07,765 --> 00:01:11,363
Thank you. Thank you very much.
I'm just browsing.
12
00:01:11,524 --> 00:01:13,883
- Thank you.
- So let me guess.
13
00:01:14,044 --> 00:01:15,243
Big night tonight?
14
00:01:15,924 --> 00:01:17,203
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
15
00:01:17,364 --> 00:01:19,602
Yeah, actually. Actually, the biggest.
16
00:01:19,764 --> 00:01:20,723
- Really?
- Yeah.
17
00:01:20,884 --> 00:01:22,882
- Ménage à trois?
- Pardon me?
18
00:01:23,043 --> 00:01:24,802
I'm kidding.
19
00:01:24,963 --> 00:01:27,682
Oh, a ménage à trois.
20
00:01:28,563 --> 00:01:30,762
French for, "Who's that dude?"
21
00:01:33,203 --> 00:01:35,481
So you're looking
for something for your girl?
22
00:01:35,642 --> 00:01:37,281
Well, not just any girl, okay?
23
00:01:37,442 --> 00:01:41,401
The most...
The most beautiful and incredible
24
00:01:41,562 --> 00:01:43,761
and amazing and...
25
00:01:43,922 --> 00:01:46,521
Well, girl I've ever met.
26
00:01:47,681 --> 00:01:50,880
Okay. Well, if you have any questions,
my name is Claire.
27
00:01:51,041 --> 00:01:53,720
Okay. Actually, yeah.
Does this come in red?
28
00:01:54,481 --> 00:01:58,919
- I can check.
- Also, Claire, does it come any larger?
29
00:02:05,601 --> 00:02:07,199
Much, much larger.
30
00:02:14,680 --> 00:02:15,839
Oh, no.
31
00:02:21,359 --> 00:02:23,038
Hey. Is she in there?
32
00:02:23,199 --> 00:02:26,038
- Yeah, she's in there.
- Good. How do I look?
33
00:02:26,199 --> 00:02:28,598
I see your balls.
34
00:02:29,599 --> 00:02:32,997
Are you crazy?
Come here. Come here. Up here, up.
35
00:02:33,159 --> 00:02:34,117
- What's the matter with you?
- What?
36
00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:37,637
- This? This is the big idea?
- Yeah. Yeah. She's gonna love it.
37
00:02:37,798 --> 00:02:38,877
- She's gonna hate it.
- She's gonna love it.
38
00:02:39,038 --> 00:02:40,397
- No, she's gonna hate it.
- Love it.
39
00:02:40,558 --> 00:02:42,396
No, she's gonna hate it more
than I hate it, and I really hate it.
40
00:02:42,557 --> 00:02:44,756
You know what your problem is, Ted?
You just...
41
00:02:44,917 --> 00:02:47,997
- You don't understand true love.
- Oh, and you do?
42
00:02:48,157 --> 00:02:50,716
I understand that there's a girl
that I love waiting for me in there.
43
00:02:50,877 --> 00:02:53,396
And you know what? She loves me, too.
44
00:02:53,557 --> 00:02:55,956
I still see balls.
45
00:03:05,236 --> 00:03:07,675
Can I get you a drink
while you wait for your friend?
46
00:03:11,836 --> 00:03:14,595
Hopefully, in a man's life,
you do this one time.
47
00:03:14,755 --> 00:03:17,634
Well, I want my one time
to be unforgettable.
48
00:03:17,795 --> 00:03:22,194
I want tonight to be a story Vanessa
and me will be telling our grandkids.
49
00:03:22,355 --> 00:03:24,233
You almost done with that baby oil?
50
00:03:24,395 --> 00:03:26,194
Yeah. That's it.
51
00:03:26,355 --> 00:03:29,193
Get it in there. Soak those abs.
52
00:03:29,354 --> 00:03:32,193
- I'm gonna kill you.
- (SIGHING) Thanks, buddy.
53
00:03:32,354 --> 00:03:33,833
- What's up, ladies?
- Oh, goodness.
54
00:03:35,554 --> 00:03:38,513
There you go, beautiful. I brought
you some C rations on the house.
55
00:03:38,674 --> 00:03:39,953
Some what?
56
00:03:40,114 --> 00:03:43,992
Oh, sorry. That's Special Forces talk.
57
00:03:44,513 --> 00:03:47,032
Are you in the Special Forces?
58
00:03:47,193 --> 00:03:49,792
That's not something
I'm at liberty to discuss.
59
00:03:53,872 --> 00:03:54,992
(EXCLAIMING)
60
00:03:55,153 --> 00:03:57,672
Anderson, I sell cars.
My job is to close a deal.
61
00:03:57,832 --> 00:03:59,511
Trust me.
This is not gonna close a deal.
62
00:03:59,672 --> 00:04:02,991
- Give me the ring, Ted.
- No. I can't let you do this.
63
00:04:03,152 --> 00:04:04,391
- Give me the ring!
- No.
64
00:04:04,552 --> 00:04:05,551
- Give me the ring, now!
- No.
65
00:04:05,712 --> 00:04:06,870
Give me the ring!
66
00:04:12,271 --> 00:04:15,470
Just give me the ring! I just
want the ring! I've got to propose!
67
00:04:15,631 --> 00:04:18,270
Okay. Hey, watch the wings!
Watch the wings!
68
00:04:20,431 --> 00:04:22,229
I'm not gonna lie to you, Vanessa.
69
00:04:22,871 --> 00:04:25,109
Special Ops,
70
00:04:25,670 --> 00:04:27,349
it's a deadly game.
71
00:04:28,950 --> 00:04:31,589
But as a very brave person
once remarked,
72
00:04:31,750 --> 00:04:35,789
"Life is either daring or it's nothing."
73
00:04:36,870 --> 00:04:39,909
Do you know who that brave person was?
74
00:04:40,069 --> 00:04:43,268
My personal hero, Helen Keller.
75
00:04:45,589 --> 00:04:50,188
Helen Keller.
76
00:04:57,628 --> 00:05:01,267
Excuse me, Vanessa. I think
table 16 needs more garlic knots.
77
00:05:09,587 --> 00:05:14,546
Ladies and gentlemen,
may I have your attention, please?
78
00:05:14,707 --> 00:05:17,666
I am Cupid, god of love.
79
00:05:19,387 --> 00:05:20,505
Dear God!
80
00:05:21,427 --> 00:05:24,066
Shooter! Shooter! We got a shooter!
81
00:05:24,226 --> 00:05:26,345
Down! Everybody, down!
82
00:05:26,506 --> 00:05:27,985
Down! Down!
83
00:05:29,106 --> 00:05:30,065
(GROANS)
84
00:05:30,226 --> 00:05:31,185
(GRUNTING)
85
00:05:33,305 --> 00:05:34,384
Anderson!
86
00:05:34,545 --> 00:05:37,424
- You know this perp?
- He's my boyfriend.
87
00:05:37,585 --> 00:05:39,824
I didn't know you had a boyfriend.
88
00:05:39,985 --> 00:05:42,504
Anderson, get up! Get up!
89
00:05:42,864 --> 00:05:45,224
You could have gotten yourself killed!
90
00:05:46,825 --> 00:05:48,263
Vanessa, I...
91
00:05:49,744 --> 00:05:51,624
I wrote you a poem.
92
00:05:54,424 --> 00:05:55,823
(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING)
93
00:06:05,263 --> 00:06:08,702
"I am Cupid, god of love"
94
00:06:10,663 --> 00:06:12,621
"I come from skies far above"
95
00:06:13,943 --> 00:06:15,862
"Bringing love to all I see"
96
00:06:17,582 --> 00:06:19,661
"Now I have found some love for me"
97
00:06:20,143 --> 00:06:21,102
Fag.
98
00:06:22,102 --> 00:06:25,780
"And so I get on bended knee"
99
00:06:27,782 --> 00:06:31,820
"To ask, Vanessa, will you marry me?"
100
00:06:31,981 --> 00:06:33,900
(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING)
101
00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:36,180
(APPLAUDING)
102
00:06:38,061 --> 00:06:42,020
(GROANING)
103
00:06:43,141 --> 00:06:44,339
Vanessa?
104
00:06:45,901 --> 00:06:47,939
WOMAN: Oh, my God. She's...
105
00:06:48,700 --> 00:06:49,939
Nessy?
106
00:07:07,618 --> 00:07:11,978
♪ I stopped to think about ♪
♪ the bad times that I've had ♪
107
00:07:14,058 --> 00:07:17,257
♪ It puts a smile on my face ♪
108
00:07:20,858 --> 00:07:24,657
Curled up with nothing to do
109
00:07:26,938 --> 00:07:31,457
♪ Why is the sun always out ♪
♪ when I'm feeling blue? ♪
110
00:07:33,057 --> 00:07:37,896
♪ It must be you ♪
♪ Oh, it must be you ♪
111
00:07:39,537 --> 00:07:42,175
♪ It must be you ♪
112
00:07:42,336 --> 00:07:48,095
♪ Oh, it must be you ♪
113
00:07:52,735 --> 00:07:57,254
♪ When I took ♪
♪ my first drink of alcohol ♪
114
00:07:59,655 --> 00:08:03,934
♪ I saw the Angel of Death ♪
♪ floating over us all ♪
115
00:08:06,135 --> 00:08:10,254
♪ With a smile on my face ♪
♪ I just wept ♪
116
00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:16,813
♪ How does a grown man laugh ♪
♪ in the face of death? ♪
117
00:08:18,574 --> 00:08:23,933
♪ It must be you ♪
♪ Oh, it must be you ♪
118
00:09:18,049 --> 00:09:19,489
(SIGHS)
119
00:09:22,250 --> 00:09:25,408
(SQUEAKING)
120
00:09:29,089 --> 00:09:30,288
(SNIFFS)
121
00:09:52,447 --> 00:09:53,406
(SQUEAKS)
122
00:09:58,247 --> 00:09:59,605
Hey, you hungry?
123
00:10:05,886 --> 00:10:08,285
Did I ever tell you
what she smelled like?
124
00:10:08,446 --> 00:10:10,365
- What?
- Dew drops.
125
00:10:13,006 --> 00:10:16,164
- She was perfect.
- Nobody's perfect.
126
00:10:16,325 --> 00:10:20,405
Okay. Like, you know how most people
have wrinkly knees?
127
00:10:20,565 --> 00:10:23,404
Okay? Hers were perfectly smooth,
like billiard balls.
128
00:10:23,565 --> 00:10:25,244
- You know what I used to call her?
- What?
129
00:10:25,405 --> 00:10:28,564
- Billiard ball knees.
- You know what might be fun?
130
00:10:28,725 --> 00:10:31,484
Not talking about your dead girlfriend.
Huh?
131
00:10:31,645 --> 00:10:33,643
I still see her sometimes.
132
00:10:33,804 --> 00:10:35,363
- Here?
- Just forget it.
133
00:10:35,524 --> 00:10:36,723
You know, I'd like to, Anderson,
I really would,
134
00:10:36,884 --> 00:10:38,163
but you won't shut up about it.
135
00:10:38,324 --> 00:10:40,923
She's been dead twice as long
as you knew her. Get over it.
136
00:10:41,084 --> 00:10:43,202
- I'm sorry, "Get over it"?
- Yeah.
137
00:10:43,363 --> 00:10:45,603
How do you get over perfection?
How do you get over perfection?
138
00:10:45,764 --> 00:10:50,082
You look around. Maybe there's
another perfect somebody out there.
139
00:10:59,883 --> 00:11:01,161
Here we go.
140
00:11:02,842 --> 00:11:05,321
- WOMAN: Don't talk to him like that.
- Eat that goddamn spaghetti.
141
00:11:05,482 --> 00:11:07,040
This is just what the therapist
was talking about.
142
00:11:07,201 --> 00:11:09,001
MAN: We're wasting enough money
on that therapist.
143
00:11:09,162 --> 00:11:10,121
WOMAN: I don't believe you.
144
00:11:10,282 --> 00:11:11,600
MAN: Who wanted to come here? Not me.
145
00:11:11,962 --> 00:11:16,160
- (EXCLAIMS)
- I am so sorry. What did you just do?
146
00:11:16,321 --> 00:11:18,200
WOMAN: What did you do?
147
00:11:18,361 --> 00:11:20,400
Satisfied? I looked around.
148
00:11:20,881 --> 00:11:21,840
I'm just saying,
149
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:23,960
don't throw your whole life away
'cause you killed your girlfriend.
150
00:11:24,121 --> 00:11:26,360
- Fiancée.
- Technically, she never said yes.
151
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,400
Anyway, I don't know
if you're gonna find anyone else
152
00:11:28,561 --> 00:11:30,439
whose butt smells
like gumdrops or whatever,
153
00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:33,319
but I know you won't unless you try.
154
00:11:33,480 --> 00:11:36,118
So is that it? Is that it, huh?
You want me to try?
155
00:11:36,279 --> 00:11:37,319
One time. That's all I'm saying.
156
00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:40,398
- One time. I try, you get off my back.
- You have my solemn word.
157
00:11:40,559 --> 00:11:41,758
Fine.
158
00:11:41,919 --> 00:11:44,998
Fine, Ted. I'll try. I'll try.
159
00:11:45,399 --> 00:11:47,958
Hey. Can I get you guys anything else?
160
00:11:48,999 --> 00:11:51,158
(SINGING SOFTLY)
That's what I'm talking about.
161
00:11:52,559 --> 00:11:53,518
Back on the horse.
162
00:11:53,678 --> 00:11:56,077
Is there anything else
I can get for you?
163
00:11:58,198 --> 00:11:59,797
Will you marry me?
164
00:12:01,558 --> 00:12:03,917
- Excuse me?
- Will you marry me?
165
00:12:05,877 --> 00:12:09,076
LOIS: Stuart, you're flapping...
All right. Pigs? Three little pigs?
166
00:12:09,437 --> 00:12:11,197
A banjo? And piggies?
167
00:12:12,077 --> 00:12:13,596
Deliverance!
168
00:12:14,197 --> 00:12:16,596
- Oh, my gosh! Like a machine.
- Oh, man.
169
00:12:16,757 --> 00:12:19,916
- Oh, my God. Oh, you guys are so fast.
- That was great.
170
00:12:20,077 --> 00:12:22,596
Okay. It's my turn,
and this is a really good one.
171
00:12:22,756 --> 00:12:27,155
So I need you all to pay attention.
Especially you, mon amour.
172
00:12:27,316 --> 00:12:29,355
(FRENCH ACCENT)
Give me the little hand.
173
00:12:29,516 --> 00:12:32,275
- Isn't he the cutest thing ever?
- Hey, I resent that.
174
00:12:32,436 --> 00:12:34,515
Isn't it getting kind of late, you guys?
175
00:12:34,675 --> 00:12:36,594
Oh, what's the matter, Cinderella?
176
00:12:36,755 --> 00:12:39,674
You're not gonna turn
into a pumpkin, are you?
177
00:12:41,235 --> 00:12:43,993
Do I know how to push her buttons,
or what?
178
00:12:44,155 --> 00:12:45,994
I am pushing your buttons.
179
00:12:46,995 --> 00:12:51,033
Honey, do your charade, okay?
I have to get up early tomorrow.
180
00:12:51,194 --> 00:12:52,553
Aye, aye, Captain. Okay.
181
00:12:53,035 --> 00:12:54,513
Oh, wait. We can't do this...
182
00:12:55,474 --> 00:12:57,033
Incoming.
183
00:12:57,194 --> 00:12:59,753
Here we go. Last one.
184
00:13:00,634 --> 00:13:03,472
(INHALING DEEPLY)
185
00:13:04,633 --> 00:13:06,832
- Four words. First word.
- Four words. First word.
186
00:13:06,993 --> 00:13:08,712
- Me... Me...
- Shazam.
187
00:13:08,873 --> 00:13:11,792
William! William! Shorter. Willie. Will!
188
00:13:11,953 --> 00:13:13,232
- Will.
- Will. Okay.
189
00:13:13,393 --> 00:13:15,271
- Second word. It sounds like...
- Second word. Sounds like...
190
00:13:15,432 --> 00:13:17,552
- Rockette. Boot. Shoe.
- Shoe.
191
00:13:17,713 --> 00:13:18,751
You.
192
00:13:19,952 --> 00:13:21,392
(BLOWING)
193
00:13:22,312 --> 00:13:23,551
Fourth word.
194
00:13:23,712 --> 00:13:25,271
- Me, it's me again... Me?
- Me?
195
00:13:25,432 --> 00:13:26,671
- Oh, it is "Me." Okay.
- Will you blank me?
196
00:13:26,832 --> 00:13:28,430
Hey, buddy, there's ladies present.
197
00:13:28,591 --> 00:13:30,031
All right, well, you know,
that's just tasteless, Stuart,
198
00:13:30,192 --> 00:13:31,151
- for God's sake.
- Sorry.
199
00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:34,670
All right. Will you blank me?
Third word.
200
00:13:36,271 --> 00:13:37,471
Saunter.
201
00:13:39,191 --> 00:13:40,990
- Marry?
- Stuart, he's proposing.
202
00:13:41,151 --> 00:13:43,830
Katie, will you marry me?
203
00:13:46,351 --> 00:13:48,430
Yes! Yes! She says yes!
204
00:13:49,391 --> 00:13:50,869
- Honey?
- Katie!
205
00:13:51,910 --> 00:13:54,829
Katie!
206
00:13:55,110 --> 00:13:56,429
Honestly, Katherine,
207
00:13:56,590 --> 00:13:58,908
do you have any idea how embarrassing
that was for me last night?
208
00:13:59,070 --> 00:14:01,869
I didn't say no, Mom.
I just said I needed to think about it.
209
00:14:02,029 --> 00:14:03,308
What's there to think about?
210
00:14:03,469 --> 00:14:06,308
That boy is a catch, and he's crazy
about you. God knows why.
211
00:14:06,469 --> 00:14:09,427
Just tell me, what is it you want?
Because William is perfect.
212
00:14:09,589 --> 00:14:11,468
For one thing, he's just about
the most attractive orthodontist
213
00:14:11,628 --> 00:14:13,788
I think I've ever seen.
And he's incredibly romantic.
214
00:14:13,949 --> 00:14:17,187
Mom, I know he's perfect.
I just need a little time.
215
00:14:17,349 --> 00:14:19,947
- Will you talk to her, Stuart?
- Not to toot my own horn,
216
00:14:20,108 --> 00:14:21,987
but William reminds me a lot of me
when I was younger.
217
00:14:22,148 --> 00:14:25,307
- Are you listening to your father?
- He is not my father.
218
00:14:25,468 --> 00:14:27,467
This man is more of a father to you
than your father ever was,
219
00:14:27,628 --> 00:14:29,066
God rest his soul.
220
00:14:29,227 --> 00:14:32,187
- Dad is not dead.
- He's dead to me, the son of a bitch.
221
00:14:32,347 --> 00:14:34,346
- Don't talk about Dad that way!
- Don't you raise your voice to me!
222
00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:36,426
- You're getting emotional, Lois.
- I am not getting emotional!
223
00:14:36,586 --> 00:14:39,946
All right. I am leaving
this house in five minutes,
224
00:14:40,107 --> 00:14:43,426
and if you want to be on that bus,
I suggest you pull yourself together.
225
00:14:46,826 --> 00:14:48,785
Sometimes I wonder
if you still love him.
226
00:14:48,946 --> 00:14:49,985
Who?
227
00:14:50,985 --> 00:14:52,904
- Dad.
- Are you crazy?
228
00:14:53,065 --> 00:14:55,384
- Are you out of your mind?
- Well, you must have loved him once.
229
00:14:55,545 --> 00:15:00,104
Honey, I was 18 when I met your father
and about as dumb as a piece of ham.
230
00:15:00,905 --> 00:15:03,744
What did I know about love?
All I knew was...
231
00:15:08,144 --> 00:15:11,463
He was the hottest thing
that I had ever seen.
232
00:15:11,624 --> 00:15:15,943
Oh, he looked like a panther,
233
00:15:16,504 --> 00:15:18,023
a sex panther.
234
00:15:20,304 --> 00:15:22,942
- Sounds like love to me.
- Well, there's a big difference
235
00:15:23,103 --> 00:15:26,542
between love and mindless,
animalistic, carnal lust.
236
00:15:27,704 --> 00:15:29,422
And what do you have with Stuart?
237
00:15:30,423 --> 00:15:33,782
What I have with Stuart
is what I want for you and William.
238
00:15:33,943 --> 00:15:36,742
- A mature, stable relationship.
- But are you happy?
239
00:15:36,903 --> 00:15:39,782
Of course I'm happy. I'm very happy.
240
00:15:39,942 --> 00:15:42,181
Very, very happy.
241
00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:44,581
No, no. Very happy.
242
00:15:45,662 --> 00:15:46,621
Very happy.
243
00:15:46,782 --> 00:15:49,301
- I gotta go. The bus is here.
- All right.
244
00:15:55,181 --> 00:15:56,860
Very happy.
245
00:16:15,179 --> 00:16:18,419
There she is. There's my beautiful girl!
246
00:16:18,580 --> 00:16:20,978
Hey! Keep it down.
247
00:16:21,139 --> 00:16:25,538
I will eat your head! I will
tear it off, shove it up your ass,
248
00:16:25,699 --> 00:16:28,698
pull it through your mouth,
brush my teeth with it, and then eat it!
249
00:16:28,859 --> 00:16:30,418
- I will eat it.
- Smitty!
250
00:16:30,579 --> 00:16:32,578
I'm not finished. Eat it!
251
00:16:34,499 --> 00:16:36,538
- Dad.
- What?
252
00:16:36,699 --> 00:16:38,817
- Apologize to him.
- Oh, come on.
253
00:16:38,978 --> 00:16:43,897
I'm serious, Dad. It's just rude. Now.
254
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:46,217
Do it now, Dad.
255
00:16:49,217 --> 00:16:52,737
Hey, Dave. I'm sorry.
256
00:16:54,497 --> 00:16:55,456
Smitty, I'm working
on my appeal over here.
257
00:16:55,617 --> 00:16:58,296
I know, I know. I'm sorry.
258
00:17:00,176 --> 00:17:03,936
You see, that's why
I love you so much, Baby Bear.
259
00:17:04,097 --> 00:17:05,896
You got your mother's good heart.
260
00:17:08,736 --> 00:17:09,975
What's wrong?
261
00:17:10,136 --> 00:17:13,135
No, nothing.
William asked me to marry him.
262
00:17:13,296 --> 00:17:15,335
But that's good.
That's what you wanted, no?
263
00:17:15,496 --> 00:17:16,614
Yeah.
264
00:17:18,776 --> 00:17:20,334
No.
265
00:17:20,495 --> 00:17:23,134
Oh, Dad, I don't know. I just...
266
00:17:24,775 --> 00:17:28,133
I mean, how are you supposed to know
when you're with the right person?
267
00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:32,853
Just listen to your heart, Baby Bear.
268
00:17:33,014 --> 00:17:34,014
You'll know.
269
00:17:35,774 --> 00:17:38,773
Hey, do you know what I do
when I'm feeling blue?
270
00:17:38,934 --> 00:17:41,533
Yeah. You drink homemade toilet wine.
271
00:17:41,694 --> 00:17:42,653
No!
272
00:17:42,813 --> 00:17:46,652
Well, yeah. But I also write
in my gratitude journal.
273
00:17:46,813 --> 00:17:49,452
And every day, I write about the things
that I have to be grateful for,
274
00:17:49,613 --> 00:17:52,092
like you and your mother.
275
00:17:53,493 --> 00:17:54,692
Oh, here.
276
00:17:55,693 --> 00:17:59,332
"December 25th, Christmas Day."
277
00:17:59,493 --> 00:18:03,251
"I am grateful that somebody finally
stabbed that cocksucker Rodriguez."
278
00:18:03,412 --> 00:18:04,732
Dad.
279
00:18:08,852 --> 00:18:11,251
I'm gonna say yes.
280
00:18:11,412 --> 00:18:12,371
Yes!
281
00:18:12,532 --> 00:18:14,970
I mean, we get along so well, right?
282
00:18:15,132 --> 00:18:18,010
He's so funny.
He cracks me up, you guys.
283
00:18:20,451 --> 00:18:24,610
- I'm gonna say yes.
- That's great. Right, Matador?
284
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:26,329
I think William is kind of a turd.
285
00:18:26,491 --> 00:18:28,769
- Really?
- Yeah.
286
00:18:29,370 --> 00:18:34,209
But he's like a turd
with a piece of candy in it.
287
00:18:35,770 --> 00:18:37,049
(SPEAKING RUSSIAN)
288
00:18:39,130 --> 00:18:41,769
Marriage isn't in our blood.
We're circus folk.
289
00:18:41,929 --> 00:18:45,888
Gypsies roaming from big top to big top
on the open road.
290
00:18:46,969 --> 00:18:49,008
You guys have been working in the diner
since I've known you.
291
00:18:49,169 --> 00:18:52,368
Not in here, Katie. Not in here.
292
00:18:58,769 --> 00:19:01,847
Gentlemen, observe.
293
00:19:05,048 --> 00:19:09,847
(SCREAMING)
294
00:19:10,008 --> 00:19:12,327
Can I get you guys anything else?
295
00:19:13,327 --> 00:19:15,566
Will you marry me?
296
00:19:15,727 --> 00:19:17,766
- Excuse me?
- Will you marry me?
297
00:19:18,967 --> 00:19:23,526
Seriously. Think about it.
What could possibly be more romantic
298
00:19:23,687 --> 00:19:26,485
than throwing away your entire life
and running off with some handsome,
299
00:19:26,646 --> 00:19:29,925
dark-haired stranger
you spotted across a restaurant?
300
00:19:33,926 --> 00:19:37,125
I'm sorry. He's had a lot of syrup.
301
00:19:37,286 --> 00:19:40,204
- Okay.
- Okay, he's had a lot of syrup?
302
00:19:40,365 --> 00:19:41,804
Okay, I'll marry you.
303
00:19:45,005 --> 00:19:47,924
- What?
- Yes. Yes.
304
00:19:49,325 --> 00:19:50,564
I'll marry you!
305
00:19:51,204 --> 00:19:54,724
Jane! Jane! Will you cover for me?
306
00:19:54,884 --> 00:19:55,843
Where're you going?
307
00:19:56,004 --> 00:19:57,003
(SCREAMING)
308
00:19:57,164 --> 00:20:00,363
I'm getting married! To this guy!
309
00:20:01,924 --> 00:20:03,763
Come on. Come on!
310
00:20:03,923 --> 00:20:06,603
Go. Get out of here. I got the bill.
311
00:20:15,603 --> 00:20:16,562
Oh!
312
00:20:17,642 --> 00:20:18,881
Anderson.
313
00:20:19,042 --> 00:20:20,722
- Katie.
- Katie. Hi.
314
00:20:26,802 --> 00:20:28,121
Two kisses.
315
00:20:29,922 --> 00:20:32,921
Big rig. Watch this.
316
00:20:34,001 --> 00:20:35,600
Stick that arm up your ass!
317
00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:53,280
♪ Got a brand new roof above my head ♪
318
00:20:54,360 --> 00:20:58,119
♪ All the empty boxes thrown away ♪
319
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,159
- Can I ask you a question?
- Yeah. Yeah.
320
00:21:02,320 --> 00:21:04,639
So years from now,
when we're celebrating
321
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:07,119
our 37th wedding anniversary
322
00:21:08,719 --> 00:21:12,238
and one of our friends
asks us about our first date,
323
00:21:12,399 --> 00:21:15,478
- is this what we'll talk about?
- I guess it is.
324
00:21:15,638 --> 00:21:17,877
Yeah. Okay.
325
00:21:18,038 --> 00:21:20,077
And... And then I'll tell them
the funny part.
326
00:21:20,238 --> 00:21:22,157
What's the funny part?
327
00:21:22,318 --> 00:21:25,357
That after we talked about it,
you stepped in dog shit.
328
00:21:27,317 --> 00:21:30,476
- Oh! I stepped in dog shit!
- Yeah.
329
00:21:30,637 --> 00:21:31,996
Why didn't you warn me?
You could have warned me.
330
00:21:32,157 --> 00:21:33,516
That would have ruined the story.
331
00:21:33,677 --> 00:21:36,596
Ah, man. Can I borrow your...
332
00:21:36,757 --> 00:21:37,916
Oh, God! Cut it out!
333
00:21:38,077 --> 00:21:39,516
ANDERSON: Okay, careful, careful.
334
00:21:49,036 --> 00:21:52,235
- I've never been up here before.
- Yeah, it's a cool place to come
335
00:21:52,395 --> 00:21:56,514
if you want to get an old refrigerator
filled with vomit.
336
00:21:57,036 --> 00:21:58,395
I was looking for one of those.
337
00:21:58,556 --> 00:22:01,234
Yeah? Well, I think
it's two-for-one day, so...
338
00:22:03,915 --> 00:22:05,594
Look what I've got.
339
00:22:07,275 --> 00:22:08,514
Tetanus?
340
00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:13,914
(SIGHS)
341
00:22:14,074 --> 00:22:16,113
- This is stupid.
- What?
342
00:22:16,274 --> 00:22:19,993
You know, this. Us sitting up here,
pretending we're doing something.
343
00:22:20,154 --> 00:22:22,513
- It's just stupid.
- It is, right?
344
00:22:22,674 --> 00:22:24,433
I mean, obviously
we're not getting married.
345
00:22:24,594 --> 00:22:26,073
Obviously.
346
00:22:26,234 --> 00:22:29,953
- Strangers don't get married.
- Well, in some cultures they do.
347
00:22:30,393 --> 00:22:32,112
- They do?
- But not ours.
348
00:22:32,273 --> 00:22:34,792
Not ours.
Other cultures, far-away cultures.
349
00:22:34,953 --> 00:22:37,192
The Kalahari bushmen is one example.
350
00:22:37,353 --> 00:22:39,832
- And my parents did. They did.
- They did?
351
00:22:39,992 --> 00:22:41,271
My mom barely knew my dad,
352
00:22:41,433 --> 00:22:42,911
and she got pregnant with me,
and they eloped
353
00:22:43,072 --> 00:22:45,671
to this weird little place
called The House of Wedded Bliss
354
00:22:45,832 --> 00:22:47,951
- in Atlantic City.
- The House of Wedded Bliss?
355
00:22:48,112 --> 00:22:52,271
Yeah.
Doesn't that sound incredibly romantic?
356
00:22:52,432 --> 00:22:54,670
Sounds like a bad Chinese takeout place.
357
00:22:58,231 --> 00:23:02,150
Yeah, well, I mean, just because they
did, doesn't mean that we are, right?
358
00:23:03,271 --> 00:23:06,710
You probably weren't even serious
when you asked.
359
00:23:06,870 --> 00:23:10,589
- Were you?
- Of course not.
360
00:23:13,270 --> 00:23:16,749
You see, that's what I'm talking about.
I mean, this whole thing is just...
361
00:23:16,910 --> 00:23:17,869
It's stupid.
362
00:23:20,150 --> 00:23:21,629
- Wait.
- I'm sorry.
363
00:23:21,790 --> 00:23:23,109
Wait, wait, wait. What's happening?
364
00:23:23,270 --> 00:23:26,468
- I'm just such an idiot.
- Are you crying?
365
00:23:26,629 --> 00:23:28,548
- No.
- Why are you crying?
366
00:23:29,629 --> 00:23:31,267
I am not crying.
367
00:23:33,628 --> 00:23:35,748
It really looks like you're crying.
368
00:23:35,909 --> 00:23:37,548
Yeah, well, I'm crying now.
369
00:23:37,708 --> 00:23:40,667
Are you satisfied, you asshole?
370
00:23:41,908 --> 00:23:43,547
Hey. Hey, hey.
371
00:23:43,708 --> 00:23:46,067
Hey. Hey, you.
372
00:23:46,907 --> 00:23:49,587
Hey! Hey.
373
00:23:55,267 --> 00:23:56,706
Are you okay?
374
00:23:58,187 --> 00:24:02,506
I can't remember the last time I did
that. I don't think I've ever done that.
375
00:24:03,307 --> 00:24:07,186
- Do you want a tissue?
- No, I'm fine. I feel incredible.
376
00:24:07,427 --> 00:24:10,625
- Really?
- Why is that?
377
00:24:11,586 --> 00:24:14,825
- You sure you don't want a tissue?
- No, I'm fine.
378
00:24:14,986 --> 00:24:19,745
Anderson, when you asked me
to marry you,
379
00:24:19,906 --> 00:24:23,584
you probably picked the only girl
in the whole world that would say yes.
380
00:24:23,745 --> 00:24:25,944
I don't think that's a coincidence,
do you?
381
00:24:27,105 --> 00:24:28,224
I don't know.
382
00:24:28,385 --> 00:24:30,624
- Do you believe in fate?
- No.
383
00:24:30,784 --> 00:24:35,063
Neither do I.
You see, this was meant to be.
384
00:24:35,224 --> 00:24:37,103
Will you marry me?
385
00:24:37,264 --> 00:24:39,583
- TED: You said yes?
- Yeah. Well, why not?
386
00:24:39,744 --> 00:24:43,822
You know, I think this is exactly what
I need to get my life back on track.
387
00:24:43,984 --> 00:24:45,783
I mean,
why can't two strangers get married?
388
00:24:45,944 --> 00:24:49,342
- I don't know. Because it's retarded?
- Look, you said it yourself.
389
00:24:49,503 --> 00:24:51,582
You said I need to get back out there
and meet people. Right? So...
390
00:24:51,744 --> 00:24:53,502
Yeah, meet! Meet! Not marry!
391
00:24:53,663 --> 00:24:56,342
Why can't you just date her for a while
like a normal human being?
392
00:24:56,503 --> 00:24:58,262
Look, don't worry. Okay? It's not...
393
00:24:58,423 --> 00:25:00,382
You know, it's not like
we're getting married today.
394
00:25:00,542 --> 00:25:02,621
We talked about it,
and we decided to take things slow.
395
00:25:02,782 --> 00:25:05,182
- So what's next?
- She's moving in with me.
396
00:25:05,342 --> 00:25:06,301
I gotta go.
397
00:25:08,182 --> 00:25:10,381
Okay. Well, good luck with that.
398
00:25:20,101 --> 00:25:22,500
♪ I don't care whether you hear this ♪
399
00:25:22,661 --> 00:25:26,820
♪ I don't care if I'm alone ♪
♪ here singing songs to myself ♪
400
00:25:26,981 --> 00:25:30,859
♪ There's nobody else around, around ♪
401
00:25:32,341 --> 00:25:35,579
♪ Meet you up ♪
♪ at the Indian part of the town ♪
402
00:25:35,740 --> 00:25:39,259
♪ The town's shut down, ♪
♪ the people left with their bags ♪
403
00:25:39,420 --> 00:25:42,378
♪ Their kids so there's not ♪
♪ a sound, a sound ♪
404
00:25:44,140 --> 00:25:46,778
♪ But I must get from there to here ♪
405
00:25:46,939 --> 00:25:51,818
♪ There's a small voice crying on the ♪
♪ other side of the river from here ♪
406
00:25:51,979 --> 00:25:54,658
♪ It's too late to phone her now ♪
407
00:25:54,899 --> 00:25:59,058
William, I have some weird news.
It's good news for me.
408
00:25:59,219 --> 00:26:03,497
I can't marry you. I'll explain
everything later. I'm so sorry.
409
00:26:03,658 --> 00:26:07,977
I love you... As a friend. Okay, bye.
410
00:26:08,138 --> 00:26:11,377
♪ Just a minute close your eyes ♪
411
00:26:11,538 --> 00:26:15,937
♪ If we settle for this compromise ♪
♪ I'll stay with you ♪
412
00:26:16,097 --> 00:26:18,336
♪ The river looks so good tonight ♪
413
00:26:18,497 --> 00:26:21,136
Can I leave a message for 99138?
414
00:26:21,297 --> 00:26:23,736
♪ I don't know what's with your friend ♪
415
00:26:23,897 --> 00:26:25,936
Phone message, Smitty.
416
00:26:27,017 --> 00:26:31,335
♪ She said she'd had enough ♪
♪ of playing games ♪
417
00:26:31,496 --> 00:26:33,055
It's from my daughter.
She's getting married.
418
00:26:33,216 --> 00:26:34,255
Oh, yeah?
419
00:26:34,416 --> 00:26:37,774
It's too bad you're not gonna be there
to walk her down the aisle, big guy.
420
00:26:45,335 --> 00:26:47,894
(SHOUTING)
421
00:26:48,054 --> 00:26:50,334
- What is this?
- I'm getting married!
422
00:26:50,495 --> 00:26:52,814
- No, this.
- It's a diaphragm.
423
00:26:52,975 --> 00:26:56,053
I know what it is. Not in front of...
Please. Please.
424
00:26:56,214 --> 00:26:57,613
- It's her diaphragm.
- Stuart!
425
00:26:57,775 --> 00:26:59,293
- Damn it!
- Jeez.
426
00:27:00,014 --> 00:27:02,452
- Where are you going?
- I told you. I'm getting married.
427
00:27:02,614 --> 00:27:05,293
(WHOOPING)
428
00:27:05,454 --> 00:27:07,932
- You said yes!
- Not to William.
429
00:27:08,093 --> 00:27:09,573
Not to William?
430
00:27:11,253 --> 00:27:13,652
His name's Anderson.
I met him a couple of hours ago.
431
00:27:13,813 --> 00:27:15,292
A couple of hours ago?
432
00:27:15,453 --> 00:27:18,132
What kind of... What about William?
What kind of name is Anderson?
433
00:27:18,293 --> 00:27:20,532
- Use your head here, Katie.
- He's black, isn't he?
434
00:27:21,972 --> 00:27:22,931
I have to go.
435
00:27:23,092 --> 00:27:24,971
Don't you think
you're being a little impulsive?
436
00:27:25,132 --> 00:27:29,651
Yes! That is exactly what I'm being.
And guess what? It feels great!
437
00:27:32,252 --> 00:27:34,091
- You ready?
- Oh, my God.
438
00:27:34,252 --> 00:27:36,411
- Hi.
- Hey, there, dude.
439
00:27:36,572 --> 00:27:38,010
You must be Anderson.
440
00:27:38,171 --> 00:27:39,130
- No.
- Matador.
441
00:27:39,291 --> 00:27:42,290
This is my friend, Matador.
He's just giving me a ride.
442
00:27:42,451 --> 00:27:44,130
I like your Jew hat.
443
00:27:51,931 --> 00:27:55,769
Bye, Mom. I'll bring him by
for you to meet him tomorrow!
444
00:28:19,889 --> 00:28:21,167
(COUGHING)
445
00:28:21,328 --> 00:28:23,527
- Can you see?
- No.
446
00:28:23,688 --> 00:28:26,207
No problem.
You know, this happens all the time.
447
00:28:59,646 --> 00:29:00,844
How can you see?
448
00:29:01,005 --> 00:29:04,205
Just be patient!
This will clear up in a second.
449
00:29:04,365 --> 00:29:05,964
Okay, slow down.
450
00:29:06,285 --> 00:29:07,884
- What?
- Slow down.
451
00:29:08,725 --> 00:29:09,843
(TIRES SCREECHING)
452
00:29:19,364 --> 00:29:20,523
(KATIE SCREAMING)
453
00:29:20,684 --> 00:29:23,403
Oh, my! Oh, my!
454
00:29:24,164 --> 00:29:26,123
- Oh, my!
- (GROANS)
455
00:29:26,284 --> 00:29:30,123
I killed that fellow.
I killed that fellow with my car!
456
00:29:34,083 --> 00:29:36,442
- Oh, my God, not again.
- Anderson?
457
00:29:38,443 --> 00:29:39,722
Vanessa?
458
00:29:42,922 --> 00:29:43,921
Anderson?
459
00:29:46,723 --> 00:29:48,121
Vanessa?
460
00:29:51,562 --> 00:29:55,000
- Am I dead?
- You're just unconscious.
461
00:29:55,162 --> 00:29:59,080
- Does it hurt?
- Not really.
462
00:30:00,081 --> 00:30:02,760
- Now does it hurt?
- (GROANING)
463
00:30:02,921 --> 00:30:03,960
You're getting married?
464
00:30:04,121 --> 00:30:07,480
No! No! No! We're not getting married.
We're just...
465
00:30:07,641 --> 00:30:10,599
- We're just moving in together.
- I thought you loved me.
466
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:14,119
I do, Vanessa. I do.
I'll never love anybody but you.
467
00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:18,799
- Really?
- Yeah. Of course.
468
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:24,478
Then dump her.
469
00:30:30,879 --> 00:30:32,998
Promise me, Anderson.
470
00:30:37,159 --> 00:30:38,558
I promise.
471
00:30:43,079 --> 00:30:45,157
Touch my lightsaber, Luke.
472
00:30:46,958 --> 00:30:48,277
Touch it!
473
00:30:49,557 --> 00:30:50,997
- What is that? What is that?
- It's just ice.
474
00:30:51,158 --> 00:30:53,197
Okay. (GASPS)
475
00:30:56,917 --> 00:30:58,076
Hello.
476
00:31:00,757 --> 00:31:04,116
Katie, would you like
to make the introductions?
477
00:31:07,116 --> 00:31:10,275
- I hit you with my car.
- This is Matador.
478
00:31:10,436 --> 00:31:11,395
Matador.
479
00:31:11,556 --> 00:31:14,955
Here. I got you a small gift.
480
00:31:16,036 --> 00:31:17,995
I didn't have time to wrap it.
481
00:31:19,236 --> 00:31:20,714
It's a Discman.
482
00:31:22,036 --> 00:31:23,714
This is my Discman.
483
00:31:24,835 --> 00:31:26,354
Did you take this from my drawer?
484
00:31:27,715 --> 00:31:28,834
Yes, I did.
485
00:31:31,075 --> 00:31:32,114
Okay.
486
00:31:33,314 --> 00:31:36,473
Matador, could you do me a giant favor?
487
00:31:36,634 --> 00:31:37,634
Yeah.
488
00:31:37,795 --> 00:31:42,593
Is there some way that you could not
press your balls into my shin?
489
00:31:44,754 --> 00:31:47,193
- Can do.
- Thank you. Thank you.
490
00:31:47,354 --> 00:31:49,072
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
491
00:31:50,834 --> 00:31:52,033
Are you okay?
492
00:31:52,194 --> 00:31:56,632
Well, I thought he was abrupt,
but I'll be fine.
493
00:32:02,272 --> 00:32:04,512
Yeah, I think... I think I'll be okay.
494
00:32:09,752 --> 00:32:10,911
Matador.
495
00:32:12,632 --> 00:32:15,711
Oh, yeah. I'm sorry. Very good.
496
00:32:15,872 --> 00:32:16,831
Okay.
497
00:32:18,072 --> 00:32:20,910
- Take care, now.
- I will.
498
00:32:21,871 --> 00:32:23,310
He seems nice.
499
00:32:24,191 --> 00:32:27,230
- Does it hurt?
- No, it's fine.
500
00:32:27,391 --> 00:32:30,830
- You're so brave.
- Listen. Listen, Katie...
501
00:32:30,991 --> 00:32:33,470
- Hey, where's your bedroom?
- Bedroom?
502
00:32:33,630 --> 00:32:35,029
Yeah. I need to put this somewhere.
503
00:32:35,190 --> 00:32:37,229
- What's this?
- My clothes.
504
00:32:37,390 --> 00:32:40,189
- Your clothes?
- Yeah, you know, for wearing.
505
00:32:40,349 --> 00:32:45,109
Oh, clothes. Right.
I thought you said "cloves." Cloves.
506
00:32:45,270 --> 00:32:47,628
And I was like,
"Cloves, that's a weird thing to pack."
507
00:32:47,789 --> 00:32:50,749
Okay, yeah. You found the bedroom.
508
00:32:53,029 --> 00:32:55,508
So, yup. So this... This is the bedroom.
This is the bedroom.
509
00:32:55,669 --> 00:32:57,627
I should probably clean up a little.
510
00:32:57,788 --> 00:32:59,228
Good. Good.
511
00:32:59,389 --> 00:33:02,507
So listen, I was thinking about
everything and how great this is,
512
00:33:02,669 --> 00:33:04,787
but it's all happening so fast,
and I was afraid
513
00:33:04,948 --> 00:33:06,867
that maybe you thought it
was happening too fast.
514
00:33:07,028 --> 00:33:08,507
That's what makes it so exciting.
515
00:33:08,668 --> 00:33:11,626
Exactly. Exactly.
That's what I was exactly going to say.
516
00:33:11,787 --> 00:33:13,306
Because personally,
I couldn't be more thrilled.
517
00:33:13,468 --> 00:33:14,666
Well, you seem really nervous.
518
00:33:14,827 --> 00:33:17,946
Really? No, no, no. I don't...
That's weird. I don't get nervous.
519
00:33:18,107 --> 00:33:21,786
I just express joy
by sweating on occasion.
520
00:33:21,947 --> 00:33:24,026
- Who's Vanessa?
- Who?
521
00:33:24,187 --> 00:33:26,346
You said "Vanessa"
right before you passed out.
522
00:33:26,507 --> 00:33:28,665
- I did?
- Oh, is this her?
523
00:33:28,826 --> 00:33:32,265
No. No, that's not her.
I don't know who that is.
524
00:33:32,426 --> 00:33:35,025
That's... That picture
came with the frame.
525
00:33:35,226 --> 00:33:37,025
But you're in the picture.
526
00:33:39,226 --> 00:33:41,745
Yeah, there I am, right there. I know.
527
00:33:41,906 --> 00:33:43,784
That's because I used to do
some modeling when I was younger.
528
00:33:43,946 --> 00:33:45,745
- Really?
- Yes, I did.
529
00:33:45,905 --> 00:33:49,704
I did some picture frame modeling
back when that whole "regular guy" phase
530
00:33:49,865 --> 00:33:51,943
was sweeping the picture frame
modeling industry.
531
00:33:52,105 --> 00:33:54,184
- That is so cool.
- Yeah.
532
00:33:54,345 --> 00:33:56,584
(PHONE RINGING)
533
00:34:04,344 --> 00:34:05,463
The telephone's ringing.
534
00:34:10,664 --> 00:34:11,623
Should I get it?
535
00:34:11,784 --> 00:34:14,543
No. No, no, no.
It's my mom. I'll call her back.
536
00:34:14,703 --> 00:34:16,982
- Oh, should I say hi?
- That's okay.
537
00:34:17,143 --> 00:34:19,342
No, really, it's weird.
I mean, I should say hi, right?
538
00:34:19,502 --> 00:34:22,261
No, no. That's... I got it. I got it.
539
00:34:22,422 --> 00:34:25,382
Hello, Mom? Hi. Hi!
540
00:34:25,542 --> 00:34:27,541
Oh, same old, same old.
How are you guys?
541
00:34:27,703 --> 00:34:30,061
(WHISPERING) If she wants
to talk to me, I'm here.
542
00:34:30,262 --> 00:34:33,501
Yeah, listen. No.
Everything is... Everything is...
543
00:34:33,662 --> 00:34:35,781
- Everything is good.
- Okay, sweetie.
544
00:34:35,942 --> 00:34:38,300
- Yeah.
- I gotta go, Mom. I love you.
545
00:34:38,461 --> 00:34:41,060
Yeah. Love you. See you tomorrow, then.
546
00:34:41,221 --> 00:34:43,820
Okay. See you tomorrow.
547
00:34:43,981 --> 00:34:45,140
Bye-bye.
548
00:34:48,341 --> 00:34:49,620
How's Anderson?
549
00:34:49,781 --> 00:34:52,979
Fine, I guess.
He says he has a surprise for us.
550
00:34:53,140 --> 00:34:55,540
He's coming over tomorrow.
551
00:34:55,700 --> 00:34:57,219
What's he doing tomorrow?
552
00:34:59,340 --> 00:35:00,498
Coming.
553
00:35:01,780 --> 00:35:03,219
He's what?
554
00:35:07,060 --> 00:35:08,378
Coming.
555
00:35:12,419 --> 00:35:16,498
♪ I can give you what you want ♪
556
00:35:16,659 --> 00:35:18,858
- ♪ I can make your heart beat short ♪
- I'm scared.
557
00:35:19,858 --> 00:35:22,097
Give me that, little girl.
558
00:35:22,378 --> 00:35:26,097
I'm just a little girl.
I'm a little girl.
559
00:35:26,258 --> 00:35:27,217
(WHIPPED CREAM DISPENSING)
560
00:35:31,978 --> 00:35:35,297
- Anderson?
- Just a minute! Just a minute.
561
00:35:35,458 --> 00:35:38,936
♪ I can be the sauce you crave ♪
562
00:35:39,097 --> 00:35:42,735
♪ I can spell what you can't say ♪
563
00:35:42,897 --> 00:35:46,536
♪ Chocolate flavored love theme treat ♪
♪ that treats you so mean ♪
564
00:35:46,697 --> 00:35:50,256
♪ Covering your nights and days ♪
565
00:35:50,416 --> 00:35:54,095
♪ Let me give you what you'd like ♪
566
00:35:54,256 --> 00:35:57,775
♪ I can make your mouth run dry ♪
567
00:35:57,936 --> 00:36:01,375
♪ Drink me like a liquor, ♪
♪ c'mon and dip your dipper ♪
568
00:36:01,535 --> 00:36:05,055
♪ Show me what you're here for, guy ♪
569
00:36:08,335 --> 00:36:11,533
- Anderson? Anderson?
- Coming.
570
00:36:12,774 --> 00:36:15,014
Okay. (SIGHING)
571
00:36:15,175 --> 00:36:19,813
Listen. Listen, Katie.
I think you're really neat. Okay, I do.
572
00:36:19,974 --> 00:36:22,214
But I just...
573
00:36:22,374 --> 00:36:26,013
I can't. I can't,
'cause I made a promise to somebody.
574
00:36:26,174 --> 00:36:27,133
And...
575
00:36:28,654 --> 00:36:31,852
"I think you're really neat"? God.
576
00:36:36,573 --> 00:36:49,251
♪ What you want ♪
♪ I can give you what you want ♪
577
00:36:49,412 --> 00:36:51,731
♪ What you want ♪
♪ I can ♪
578
00:36:51,932 --> 00:36:54,330
Oh, God! I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. Sorry, sorry.
579
00:36:54,492 --> 00:36:57,451
No, Anderson. It's okay.
Turn around.
580
00:37:05,011 --> 00:37:06,730
So what did your mom say?
581
00:37:06,891 --> 00:37:09,250
Oh, yeah. Well, she...
582
00:37:09,410 --> 00:37:14,249
I was thinking that we could go over
there and meet them before we...
583
00:37:14,410 --> 00:37:18,089
- Get married?
- If you want to put a label on it.
584
00:37:18,970 --> 00:37:21,849
Great, 'cause I told my mom
we'd go over to visit her tomorrow, too.
585
00:37:22,010 --> 00:37:24,488
Great. That's great.
586
00:37:24,649 --> 00:37:28,208
I was thinking we could take a bus over
to my folks' house.
587
00:37:28,369 --> 00:37:31,808
- I like buses.
- That's good. 'Cause it's a bus.
588
00:37:31,969 --> 00:37:33,288
It's a bus.
589
00:37:36,649 --> 00:37:37,768
Minty.
590
00:37:38,289 --> 00:37:42,087
Well, that's toothpaste for you.
That's just classic toothpaste.
591
00:37:43,368 --> 00:37:45,168
(SCREAMING)
592
00:37:45,328 --> 00:37:46,807
Oh, God!
593
00:37:46,968 --> 00:37:49,847
- It's in my eye! It hurts!
- I'm sorry. I swallowed some. Sorry.
594
00:37:50,007 --> 00:37:50,966
It's really burning.
595
00:37:51,128 --> 00:37:52,647
Did you wanna go in...
The bathroom's right there.
596
00:37:52,808 --> 00:37:56,206
- Where?
- Yup, this way. Yes. Yeah, you got it.
597
00:37:56,847 --> 00:37:59,086
Maybe I should go out
and get some saline solution.
598
00:37:59,247 --> 00:38:00,486
No. I'm fine.
599
00:38:00,647 --> 00:38:02,886
Yeah, but maybe I should go, you know,
600
00:38:03,047 --> 00:38:05,286
get some saline
or eye drops or something.
601
00:38:05,447 --> 00:38:06,725
No, really.
602
00:38:08,646 --> 00:38:10,526
I'll go get some saline.
603
00:38:11,767 --> 00:38:15,525
- Okay. Okay. Okay.
- Okay. Slow down. What's the problem?
604
00:38:15,686 --> 00:38:17,605
I think she wants to have sex with me.
605
00:38:17,766 --> 00:38:20,005
I'm gonna call 911.
606
00:38:20,165 --> 00:38:23,685
I'm so embarrassed.
I mean, I feel like such an idiot.
607
00:38:23,846 --> 00:38:26,804
- Maybe you came on a little strong.
- Oh, God.
608
00:38:26,965 --> 00:38:30,404
A couple hours ago, she was moving in.
All your problems were solved,
609
00:38:30,565 --> 00:38:32,564
rainbows were shooting out of your ass.
What happened?
610
00:38:32,804 --> 00:38:35,563
Nothing. Nothing. She's great.
She's great. It's just...
611
00:38:35,725 --> 00:38:36,684
What?
612
00:38:36,845 --> 00:38:40,004
- What would Vanessa say? Huh?
- Oh, buddy.
613
00:38:40,165 --> 00:38:42,723
I was just trying to be spontaneous,
you know?
614
00:38:42,884 --> 00:38:44,963
He probably thinks I'm such a freak.
615
00:38:45,123 --> 00:38:47,643
No. Trust me. You're not a freak.
616
00:38:47,804 --> 00:38:52,322
Hold on. Help. Help. Help me.
617
00:38:52,484 --> 00:38:53,723
I've got to go. He's here.
618
00:38:56,243 --> 00:38:58,922
- Hi.
- Hi. Hi.
619
00:38:59,083 --> 00:39:02,162
They were out of saline,
so I got you some Q-tips
620
00:39:02,323 --> 00:39:04,601
and some zit cream.
621
00:39:04,762 --> 00:39:08,161
So you can do with that what you please.
622
00:39:09,762 --> 00:39:10,761
How's your head?
623
00:39:10,922 --> 00:39:13,920
- Oh, sorry.
- No, it's okay.
624
00:39:17,162 --> 00:39:18,641
My eye is fine.
625
00:39:18,802 --> 00:39:20,601
Right. How's your eye?
626
00:39:22,682 --> 00:39:24,200
- It's fine.
- Good.
627
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:47,879
Wow.
628
00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:51,479
- Wowee.
- Wowee dowee doo.
629
00:39:54,159 --> 00:39:56,478
Doowee wowie booby.
630
00:39:59,598 --> 00:40:03,958
Well, I think we better get to bed.
I think it's time for...
631
00:40:04,118 --> 00:40:07,037
Not... I mean, not that kind of bed.
Not that kind of bed.
632
00:40:07,198 --> 00:40:09,877
I mean... I mean, like,
sleepy time. Sleepy bed.
633
00:40:10,438 --> 00:40:11,396
'Cause...
634
00:40:11,838 --> 00:40:14,637
'Cause I... You know.
'Cause your eye and my head and...
635
00:40:14,798 --> 00:40:16,117
Well, if we have
any more physical contact,
636
00:40:16,278 --> 00:40:18,596
I think one of us might
actually die. So...
637
00:40:35,236 --> 00:40:37,115
(SNORING)
638
00:40:44,676 --> 00:40:47,674
♪ So the weekend came and went ♪
639
00:40:47,836 --> 00:40:49,274
- I'm sorry. Sorry.
- It's all right.
640
00:40:49,435 --> 00:40:51,553
- Go back to sleep. I'm sorry.
- It's all right.
641
00:40:52,955 --> 00:40:57,954
♪ Sunday afternoon's a memory ♪
642
00:41:00,194 --> 00:41:03,433
♪ She was just lying there ♪
643
00:41:03,594 --> 00:41:07,113
♪ Sleeping softly in a chair ♪
644
00:41:08,354 --> 00:41:11,072
(ALARM BEEPING)
645
00:41:11,993 --> 00:41:15,312
Are you almost ready? I told Mom
we'd be there in, like, half an hour.
646
00:41:15,833 --> 00:41:17,712
She's gonna love you!
647
00:41:19,993 --> 00:41:20,992
Fourth word!
648
00:41:23,913 --> 00:41:27,111
You're holding hands.
You're holding hands.
649
00:41:27,272 --> 00:41:29,031
You're with friends. You're skip...
650
00:41:29,192 --> 00:41:31,111
Wizard of Oz! The Wizard of Oz!
651
00:41:34,712 --> 00:41:37,311
Diving? The Greg Louganis Story?
652
00:41:41,511 --> 00:41:42,910
Flashdance.
653
00:41:44,951 --> 00:41:46,270
Airplane!
654
00:41:48,750 --> 00:41:49,709
Him?
655
00:41:49,951 --> 00:41:51,590
Her? When a Man Loves a Woman!
656
00:41:51,751 --> 00:41:52,869
Sound of Music!
657
00:41:53,030 --> 00:41:54,109
Philadelphia!
658
00:41:54,270 --> 00:41:56,390
Deep Throat! Deep Throat!
659
00:41:56,551 --> 00:41:57,989
Oh, sorry.
660
00:41:58,550 --> 00:42:00,109
Okay. You know what?
You know what, dear?
661
00:42:00,270 --> 00:42:02,149
We give up. Why don't you just tell us?
662
00:42:03,590 --> 00:42:06,269
- That was The Apple Dumpling Gang.
- Oh.
663
00:42:11,429 --> 00:42:14,388
It's not an easy one. So...
664
00:42:14,549 --> 00:42:15,708
It was really good.
665
00:42:15,869 --> 00:42:19,108
Thanks. Thanks. Thank you.
I'm sorry... Thanks.
666
00:42:19,269 --> 00:42:21,787
- You're so good. Yeah. It was hard.
- I thought it...
667
00:42:21,948 --> 00:42:23,867
- I thought it made sense.
- It was good.
668
00:42:24,028 --> 00:42:25,627
- It was a tough one, so...
- Yeah.
669
00:42:25,788 --> 00:42:30,547
And then a few years ago, I was
in a toy store and I had a thought.
670
00:42:30,707 --> 00:42:32,987
What if there was
a line of stuffed animals
671
00:42:33,148 --> 00:42:36,587
specifically for Jewish children?
672
00:42:36,747 --> 00:42:39,187
And that's when the Jewnicorn was born.
673
00:42:41,187 --> 00:42:42,866
Listen.
674
00:42:43,027 --> 00:42:45,426
(JEWNICORN RECITING BLESSING
IN HEBREW)
675
00:42:53,546 --> 00:42:56,185
Well, Anderson, what do you think?
676
00:42:58,386 --> 00:43:01,984
Wow.
677
00:43:03,625 --> 00:43:05,424
I think it's very...
678
00:43:11,025 --> 00:43:12,264
Specific.
679
00:43:14,184 --> 00:43:16,144
In a good way, of course.
680
00:43:16,305 --> 00:43:18,863
So, Anderson, what is it you do?
681
00:43:19,024 --> 00:43:21,383
Oh, Anderson's
between jobs right now, Mom.
682
00:43:21,544 --> 00:43:22,703
- Oh, he's between jobs?
- Yeah.
683
00:43:22,864 --> 00:43:24,143
I see.
684
00:43:24,304 --> 00:43:27,183
You know, maybe you'd like
to go downstairs to the basement
685
00:43:27,343 --> 00:43:30,143
and see where Stuart makes
all his little toys.
686
00:43:30,304 --> 00:43:32,462
- Mom, no. Why?
- Well, yeah. Yes, yeah.
687
00:43:32,623 --> 00:43:36,223
Oh, I think he'd be interested.
Especially if you like googly eyes.
688
00:43:36,384 --> 00:43:38,182
As a matter of fact,
I do like googly eyes.
689
00:43:38,343 --> 00:43:41,262
- Okay.
- That does it. Follow me, young man.
690
00:43:41,423 --> 00:43:43,742
Santa's not the only one
with a workshop.
691
00:43:43,903 --> 00:43:46,581
- Wow.
- What do you think?
692
00:43:48,023 --> 00:43:49,421
(STUTTERING)
693
00:43:54,782 --> 00:43:56,861
- What is this?
- Jewla-Hoop.
694
00:43:58,702 --> 00:44:02,141
Doesn't really work.
Kind of like you, right, Anderson?
695
00:44:08,900 --> 00:44:10,700
(EXCLAIMS) William.
696
00:44:11,660 --> 00:44:14,220
I thought you two should speak.
697
00:44:16,460 --> 00:44:19,580
I've been here this whole time.
Been watching you with him.
698
00:44:19,740 --> 00:44:21,739
I mean, what do you even see
in that loser?
699
00:44:21,900 --> 00:44:24,739
He doesn't even know how to do
The Apple Dumpling Gang.
700
00:44:24,900 --> 00:44:28,418
Apple. Dump. Ling. Gang.
701
00:44:28,580 --> 00:44:29,579
That's The Apple Dumpling Gang, okay?
702
00:44:29,739 --> 00:44:32,739
That's the motherfucking
Apple Dumpling Gang!
703
00:44:32,899 --> 00:44:33,898
(SOBBING)
704
00:44:35,019 --> 00:44:38,858
William, you are really,
really good at charades,
705
00:44:39,019 --> 00:44:41,618
and nobody can ever take that
away from you.
706
00:44:42,538 --> 00:44:44,737
I had a whole life planned for us.
707
00:44:44,898 --> 00:44:49,657
You know, a big house, three kids,
two boys and a girl, you know?
708
00:44:49,818 --> 00:44:50,777
I know.
709
00:44:50,938 --> 00:44:53,736
Conner, Tanner and Ashley. I'm sorry.
710
00:44:53,897 --> 00:44:55,136
I'm not gay.
711
00:44:56,217 --> 00:44:58,696
- What?
- What?
712
00:45:01,737 --> 00:45:04,456
- I think you should go.
- Oh, yeah.
713
00:45:04,617 --> 00:45:06,336
Okay. I'll go.
714
00:45:06,496 --> 00:45:09,576
But this ball isn't over, Cinderella.
715
00:45:09,737 --> 00:45:11,816
'Cause, oh...
716
00:45:11,976 --> 00:45:14,855
Oh, I'm still dancing.
717
00:45:16,616 --> 00:45:19,975
Do you hear me? I'm still dancing!
Check it.
718
00:45:20,296 --> 00:45:23,654
I'm still dancing. Who's still dancing?
I'm a dancing fool, yeah!
719
00:45:23,815 --> 00:45:24,774
Did you hear that?
720
00:45:27,775 --> 00:45:30,055
(SCRAPING)
721
00:45:46,774 --> 00:45:47,933
Got it.
722
00:45:49,013 --> 00:45:49,972
(SLURPING)
723
00:45:57,373 --> 00:46:02,012
We should get going, 'cause
we're gonna see Anderson's parents.
724
00:46:02,172 --> 00:46:03,492
- I'll grab our jackets.
- Okay.
725
00:46:03,653 --> 00:46:09,171
Okay, well, this has been fun.
So, thank you.
726
00:46:16,932 --> 00:46:19,610
I think they really liked you.
I do, I could tell.
727
00:46:19,771 --> 00:46:22,530
Especially my mom. My mom loved you.
728
00:46:23,532 --> 00:46:26,410
- Really?
- Yeah, definitely.
729
00:46:26,571 --> 00:46:29,570
'Cause I got the impression
she thought I was a loser.
730
00:46:29,730 --> 00:46:31,210
Why would you say that?
731
00:46:31,370 --> 00:46:35,089
When you were in the bathroom,
your mom said she thought I was a loser.
732
00:46:40,810 --> 00:46:44,089
- I thought you were great.
- Really?
733
00:46:44,250 --> 00:46:46,089
Yeah, really.
734
00:46:50,690 --> 00:46:52,889
Well, I think you're pretty great, too.
735
00:46:56,809 --> 00:47:00,288
- Sorry.
- Do you want to sit down?
736
00:47:00,448 --> 00:47:02,728
Okay. Thanks.
737
00:47:05,288 --> 00:47:07,167
- Thank you.
- Sure thing.
738
00:47:09,688 --> 00:47:10,647
(SIGHS)
739
00:47:10,808 --> 00:47:11,927
May I?
740
00:47:24,807 --> 00:47:26,006
Wow.
741
00:47:27,606 --> 00:47:30,046
Anderson, you have to feel this.
742
00:47:31,527 --> 00:47:32,685
Okay.
743
00:47:34,686 --> 00:47:39,645
Wow. I think I felt a kick.
Do you mind if I take a listen?
744
00:47:42,086 --> 00:47:43,045
Wow.
745
00:47:46,045 --> 00:47:48,965
- When are you due?
- I'm not pregnant.
746
00:47:49,125 --> 00:47:51,964
This is my stop.
Getting off, getting off, getting off!
747
00:47:52,445 --> 00:47:55,644
Excuse me. Sorry. Excuse me. Excuse me.
748
00:47:56,245 --> 00:47:58,043
Excuse me. Sorry. Sorry.
749
00:48:02,285 --> 00:48:03,803
- I feel terrible.
- That is your fault.
750
00:48:03,964 --> 00:48:05,083
- Oh, my God.
- That is your fault.
751
00:48:30,362 --> 00:48:31,401
Anderson!
752
00:48:31,562 --> 00:48:34,361
Hey, there, skipper! Hey!
753
00:48:34,522 --> 00:48:36,201
Who's the good-looking potato?
754
00:48:36,362 --> 00:48:39,441
Mom, Dad, I want you
to meet Katie, my...
755
00:48:39,601 --> 00:48:41,240
- Fiancée.
- My fiancée.
756
00:48:41,882 --> 00:48:44,521
Fiancée? Well...
757
00:48:45,921 --> 00:48:47,640
- Well...
- Congratulations!
758
00:48:48,961 --> 00:48:53,719
Hot dog! Hot dog, I say!
Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
759
00:48:53,880 --> 00:48:55,119
(DOG BARKING)
760
00:48:55,280 --> 00:48:56,919
I think Monitor approves, too.
761
00:48:57,080 --> 00:48:59,119
(ALL LAUGHING)
762
00:48:59,280 --> 00:49:00,280
The dog!
763
00:49:03,240 --> 00:49:06,039
(GUFFAWING)
764
00:49:18,559 --> 00:49:19,958
Should we go inside?
765
00:49:25,118 --> 00:49:26,517
(SLURPING)
766
00:49:28,758 --> 00:49:31,917
I've got to hand it to you, skipper.
She's a peach.
767
00:49:33,398 --> 00:49:35,436
Yeah. I guess you think
I'm being pretty foolish, huh?
768
00:49:35,598 --> 00:49:38,077
Why should I think that?
769
00:49:38,238 --> 00:49:40,796
Because I just met Katie,
and we hardly know each other.
770
00:49:40,957 --> 00:49:44,116
You've got your whole lives
to get to know each other.
771
00:49:44,277 --> 00:49:45,636
What if I don't like
what I get to know?
772
00:49:45,797 --> 00:49:48,676
Oh, that's just nerves talking.
773
00:49:48,837 --> 00:49:52,676
I remember just before I got married,
your grandpa and I walked our dog,
774
00:49:52,836 --> 00:49:56,075
had a little conversation
about the birds and the bees.
775
00:49:56,237 --> 00:50:00,435
I tell you, when he told me what
he told me, I just about fell down.
776
00:50:00,596 --> 00:50:03,674
Yeah. I think I pretty much know
everything about that stuff, Dad.
777
00:50:03,835 --> 00:50:07,234
Oh, of course you do. Of course you do.
You're a grown man.
778
00:50:07,395 --> 00:50:09,874
About time
that I started treating you like one.
779
00:50:10,035 --> 00:50:13,274
So I guess I don't have to tell you
what this is for.
780
00:50:16,434 --> 00:50:18,913
I've had this cock ring
since my Navy days.
781
00:50:19,075 --> 00:50:22,873
I got it from a $3 whore in Shanghai.
782
00:50:24,274 --> 00:50:28,553
Wow, that's a really nice...
783
00:50:30,833 --> 00:50:31,953
It's a nice ring.
784
00:50:32,114 --> 00:50:34,952
- Cock ring, Son.
- Cock ring. Cock ring.
785
00:50:35,113 --> 00:50:37,233
Yeah. I don't know what it is,
786
00:50:37,393 --> 00:50:40,152
ever since I left the service
I've been having trouble
787
00:50:40,313 --> 00:50:42,912
with firing my torpedoes too soon.
788
00:50:43,073 --> 00:50:44,072
(EXCLAIMING)
789
00:50:44,233 --> 00:50:46,952
- If you take my meaning.
- I think I do, Dad.
790
00:50:47,113 --> 00:50:50,351
- Premature ejaculation.
- Okay. Okay.
791
00:50:50,513 --> 00:50:52,151
- Son.
- Yeah.
792
00:50:53,552 --> 00:50:55,031
I want you to have it.
793
00:50:57,072 --> 00:50:59,311
I want you to have my cock ring.
794
00:51:04,751 --> 00:51:06,670
I don't know what to say.
795
00:51:06,831 --> 00:51:09,870
(CHANTING)
796
00:51:14,951 --> 00:51:16,310
(WHISPERING) Knock, knock.
797
00:51:16,991 --> 00:51:20,069
I'm sorry, Smitty.
I just wanted to borrow your Dirt Devil.
798
00:51:38,029 --> 00:51:39,388
(SCREAMING)
799
00:51:39,549 --> 00:51:40,508
(CRASHING)
800
00:51:42,109 --> 00:51:44,388
(DOG BARKING)
801
00:51:46,708 --> 00:51:48,587
Dinner was terrific, Mrs. Wells.
802
00:51:48,748 --> 00:51:52,587
Oh, no, I won't have any of that.
We're family now.
803
00:51:52,748 --> 00:51:55,586
I'd like you to call me Mommy.
804
00:51:57,387 --> 00:51:58,427
Okay.
805
00:51:59,427 --> 00:52:01,866
I suppose Anderson told you
all about Vanessa?
806
00:52:02,027 --> 00:52:04,346
Oh. No. Yeah. I mean, he did.
807
00:52:06,107 --> 00:52:07,226
Mommy.
808
00:52:08,547 --> 00:52:12,266
He really loved her.
I suppose we all did.
809
00:52:13,386 --> 00:52:16,025
I thought of that girl as one of my own.
810
00:52:17,146 --> 00:52:19,105
Why did they break up?
811
00:52:19,266 --> 00:52:23,585
Break up?
Oh, heavens, they didn't break up.
812
00:52:25,426 --> 00:52:28,384
She died, poor little thing.
813
00:52:28,545 --> 00:52:31,704
Her heart just gave out
the night he proposed.
814
00:52:32,585 --> 00:52:34,184
Oh, my God!
815
00:52:34,345 --> 00:52:38,104
Some folks around here blame Anderson,
the way he surprised her and all.
816
00:52:38,265 --> 00:52:39,623
I know I do.
817
00:52:40,944 --> 00:52:43,783
When she went,
it just about tore this family apart.
818
00:52:43,945 --> 00:52:46,663
There were nights I thought about
sticking Daddy's service revolver
819
00:52:46,824 --> 00:52:50,503
in my mouth and pulling the trigger,
just so I could be with her in heaven.
820
00:52:50,664 --> 00:52:53,503
Mrs. Wells, I'm not trying
to take Vanessa's...
821
00:52:53,664 --> 00:52:55,102
Don't you say her name.
822
00:52:56,424 --> 00:52:57,862
I will cut you.
823
00:52:59,304 --> 00:53:02,022
LYLE: We're home, Mother.
Where are you girls hiding?
824
00:53:02,183 --> 00:53:04,982
We're just having a little girl talk,
Daddy.
825
00:53:06,943 --> 00:53:09,022
Oh, how was your walk, sweetheart?
826
00:53:09,183 --> 00:53:11,941
- Very nice.
- Hi, honey.
827
00:53:13,062 --> 00:53:16,701
I don't know what you said to my mom,
but whatever it was, it worked.
828
00:53:16,862 --> 00:53:18,461
She loved you.
829
00:53:18,622 --> 00:53:21,860
And believe me, my mom's not always
as sweet as she looks.
830
00:53:22,022 --> 00:53:23,060
- Really?
- No, really.
831
00:53:23,221 --> 00:53:24,900
I know it's hard to believe.
832
00:53:26,301 --> 00:53:29,380
Don't you have anything
you want to tell me?
833
00:53:29,900 --> 00:53:31,020
Yeah.
834
00:53:32,741 --> 00:53:34,660
Yeah, there is.
835
00:53:38,740 --> 00:53:40,980
You look really nice tonight.
836
00:53:42,660 --> 00:53:44,339
You're a real jerk.
837
00:53:47,820 --> 00:53:49,538
Are we about to have our first fight?
838
00:53:49,699 --> 00:53:50,898
'Cause if we are,
you think we can finish it
839
00:53:51,059 --> 00:53:53,578
before we get to your friend's house?
840
00:53:55,019 --> 00:53:56,098
Or it could wait.
841
00:53:56,259 --> 00:53:58,338
I just don't understand.
842
00:53:58,499 --> 00:54:01,418
Why didn't you tell me
about Vanessa when I asked?
843
00:54:01,578 --> 00:54:03,618
- Who's Vanessa?
- She was my girlfriend.
844
00:54:03,778 --> 00:54:06,618
- His fiancée.
- Okay, technically, she never said yes.
845
00:54:06,779 --> 00:54:09,457
- She died.
- Did you kill her?
846
00:54:09,618 --> 00:54:10,618
No.
847
00:54:11,298 --> 00:54:12,897
That's not what your mother says.
848
00:54:13,058 --> 00:54:15,456
Look, I was gonna tell you.
Okay? Okay? But...
849
00:54:15,618 --> 00:54:18,297
But what?
I mean, you're still in love with her?
850
00:54:25,217 --> 00:54:27,656
You're in love with a dead girl!
851
00:54:27,817 --> 00:54:29,855
- You freak!
- Freak?
852
00:54:30,017 --> 00:54:32,536
Freak? I'm the freak? I'm the freak?
853
00:54:32,697 --> 00:54:34,576
What kind of person
accepts a marriage proposal
854
00:54:34,737 --> 00:54:36,415
from a complete stranger? Freak!
855
00:54:36,576 --> 00:54:38,815
Well, what kind of a person asks? Freak!
856
00:54:38,976 --> 00:54:41,135
- Stop calling me freak!
- Stop being one, you freak!
857
00:54:41,296 --> 00:54:43,974
Okay. Okay.
I don't care what you think about me,
858
00:54:44,136 --> 00:54:45,214
just leave her out of it.
859
00:54:45,375 --> 00:54:49,094
Her? Her? You can't even say her name!
860
00:54:49,255 --> 00:54:51,134
It's Vanessa, you asshole!
861
00:54:51,295 --> 00:54:55,294
And she's dead! Dead, dead, dead!
862
00:55:02,175 --> 00:55:06,014
Wow. That was harsh, harsh, harsh.
863
00:55:19,133 --> 00:55:21,532
♪ Wouldn't be the first time ♪
864
00:55:21,693 --> 00:55:25,132
♪ Love made a fool of me ♪
865
00:55:27,452 --> 00:55:30,012
♪ Wouldn't even care ♪
866
00:55:30,172 --> 00:55:33,811
♪ But now you're here to see ♪
867
00:55:38,052 --> 00:55:42,731
♪ It comes as no surprise ♪
868
00:55:43,611 --> 00:55:46,770
♪ Just leave the light on ♪
869
00:55:54,491 --> 00:55:56,649
♪ What I wouldn't give ♪
870
00:55:56,810 --> 00:56:00,409
♪ If you could have it all ♪
871
00:56:03,410 --> 00:56:05,729
♪ Sun is going down ♪
872
00:56:05,890 --> 00:56:09,489
♪ The bed that breaks the fall ♪
873
00:56:13,729 --> 00:56:18,248
♪ Cradle and the bough ♪
874
00:56:18,769 --> 00:56:22,567
♪ So you can take ♪
875
00:56:22,728 --> 00:56:26,807
♪ Comfort now ♪
876
00:56:28,248 --> 00:56:31,247
♪ You can take ♪
877
00:56:31,408 --> 00:56:34,967
♪ Comfort now ♪
878
00:56:40,727 --> 00:56:43,126
- Hey.
- Hey.
879
00:56:43,287 --> 00:56:45,646
We split up to look for you.
880
00:56:59,726 --> 00:57:03,004
You know, when I was a kid,
I didn't have many friends.
881
00:57:03,165 --> 00:57:04,524
You're kidding?
882
00:57:04,766 --> 00:57:07,925
Nope. It's the truth. I don't know why.
883
00:57:09,365 --> 00:57:11,964
Perhaps 'cause I was into
different things than the other kids.
884
00:57:12,125 --> 00:57:15,404
Acrobats, strongmen, makeup,
that sort of thing.
885
00:57:15,565 --> 00:57:17,003
Right. That sort of thing.
886
00:57:17,165 --> 00:57:20,323
But I didn't let it bother me, you know,
because I knew what I loved.
887
00:57:20,485 --> 00:57:22,123
The circus?
888
00:57:27,644 --> 00:57:30,443
You know, the circus is a lot like love.
889
00:57:31,604 --> 00:57:32,723
Oh? How so?
890
00:57:32,884 --> 00:57:38,282
Well, if it's a good one,
it's a really good one, it's beautiful
891
00:57:38,443 --> 00:57:42,962
and terrifying and magical,
all at the same time.
892
00:57:46,123 --> 00:57:48,242
And you wouldn't give up on the circus
just because
893
00:57:48,402 --> 00:57:52,241
once in a while a girl falls off
the high wire, snaps her neck.
894
00:57:55,243 --> 00:57:57,481
Oh, dead girls.
895
00:57:58,362 --> 00:58:00,961
Sensitive subject. I'm sorry.
896
00:58:08,241 --> 00:58:09,200
Morning.
897
00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:19,599
"Prison escape." Honey?
898
00:58:19,761 --> 00:58:20,720
(GRUNTING)
899
00:58:29,200 --> 00:58:30,518
No, thanks.
900
00:58:32,960 --> 00:58:35,279
I thought that maybe
you could open it for me.
901
00:58:35,439 --> 00:58:37,638
- Oh.
- Stuart?
902
00:58:39,279 --> 00:58:40,638
Stuart?
903
00:58:40,799 --> 00:58:43,957
- (EXCLAIMS)
- Hiya, Little Bear.
904
00:58:44,118 --> 00:58:46,478
What the hell are you doing here?
Stuart, honey, are you okay?
905
00:58:46,639 --> 00:58:49,997
- Ducky.
- Smitty, what did you do?
906
00:58:50,158 --> 00:58:53,877
You think I would miss walking
my little girl down that aisle?
907
00:58:54,038 --> 00:58:55,957
- Where is she?
- Ran off with her loser boyfriend.
908
00:58:56,118 --> 00:58:58,797
Hey! You shut up, all right, pal?
909
00:58:58,958 --> 00:59:01,437
Did she say where she was going?
910
00:59:01,598 --> 00:59:02,796
(CRYING)
911
00:59:02,957 --> 00:59:08,636
No! I don't know. No. No!
Get away from me. Oh, my God.
912
00:59:15,597 --> 00:59:16,595
Hey.
913
00:59:19,396 --> 00:59:21,355
Hey! Hey!
914
00:59:21,516 --> 00:59:24,235
This is all your fault.
You chased her away!
915
00:59:24,395 --> 00:59:26,795
- Lois, please, you're getting...
- Emotional?
916
00:59:26,956 --> 00:59:29,035
You're right. I'm getting good
and goddamned emotional.
917
00:59:29,195 --> 00:59:31,594
And what the hell are you going to do
about it, you tiny, tiny man?
918
00:59:31,755 --> 00:59:34,794
- Easy, Little Bear. Easy.
- You spineless little noodle.
919
00:59:34,955 --> 00:59:38,074
Easy, Lois. Now, come on.
Let's go find our baby.
920
00:59:39,115 --> 00:59:42,273
All right. Let me go get dressed,
Big Bear.
921
00:59:42,435 --> 00:59:44,353
Let me help, Little Bear.
922
00:59:51,833 --> 00:59:53,513
(CHATTERING)
923
00:59:55,153 --> 00:59:56,952
(JEWNICORN RECITING BLESSING
IN HEBREW)
924
00:59:57,593 --> 01:00:01,032
- Hey! What's that?
- Nothing.
925
01:00:09,073 --> 01:00:10,191
(RUSSIAN FOLK MUSIC
PLAYING ON RADIO)
926
01:00:10,352 --> 01:00:12,072
Take care, Matador.
927
01:00:19,391 --> 01:00:22,871
- Hey.
- You never gave me a key.
928
01:00:23,032 --> 01:00:24,311
Right.
929
01:00:28,311 --> 01:00:31,950
I just need to pack up my shit
and you'll never see me again.
930
01:00:47,870 --> 01:00:50,749
Can I get a taxi, please?
What is the address?
931
01:00:50,910 --> 01:00:53,509
- 6 New Lane.
- 6 New Lane.
932
01:00:53,669 --> 01:00:58,948
- Apartment... Don't go.
- Apartment... What?
933
01:01:00,229 --> 01:01:01,948
I like you and I don't want you to go.
934
01:01:02,109 --> 01:01:03,267
MAN: Hello?
935
01:01:03,428 --> 01:01:05,907
Hold on. What did you say?
936
01:01:06,068 --> 01:01:07,547
I like you and I don't want you to go.
937
01:01:07,708 --> 01:01:09,347
You don't like me.
938
01:01:09,508 --> 01:01:12,547
- Don't tell me who I like. Screw you!
- Screw you!
939
01:01:12,708 --> 01:01:14,147
- Screw you!
- No, screw you!
940
01:01:14,308 --> 01:01:18,587
God, you're impossible!
You are pig-headed. You are stubborn.
941
01:01:19,708 --> 01:01:22,587
You don't even warn a guy when he's
about to step in dog shit. What is that?
942
01:01:22,747 --> 01:01:24,227
Ever since I met you,
I've been a total wreck.
943
01:01:24,387 --> 01:01:27,106
Even more of a wreck than usual.
And screw you, I like you!
944
01:01:27,267 --> 01:01:31,586
Yeah? Well, you're a liar!
And you have horrible morning breath.
945
01:01:31,747 --> 01:01:34,466
And you could never have made it
as a picture frame model.
946
01:01:34,627 --> 01:01:37,506
It is so cutthroat and so competitive.
947
01:01:37,667 --> 01:01:41,665
And ever since I met you,
I've been feeling completely crazy.
948
01:01:41,826 --> 01:01:43,825
And I like you, too!
949
01:01:43,986 --> 01:01:45,944
- Okay.
- Okay.
950
01:01:47,705 --> 01:01:48,824
Okay.
951
01:01:49,146 --> 01:01:51,184
Okay. So we like each other.
952
01:01:53,505 --> 01:01:54,704
Now what?
953
01:01:57,425 --> 01:01:58,624
Let's go.
954
01:01:58,865 --> 01:02:00,504
- Really? Where?
- Trust me.
955
01:02:00,665 --> 01:02:02,143
- Where are we going?
- After you.
956
01:02:04,385 --> 01:02:08,543
- Please?
- No.
957
01:02:08,704 --> 01:02:11,422
- Doesn't one of them have a car?
- No, not one that will make it.
958
01:02:19,103 --> 01:02:20,863
No, I'm not doing this.
I'm going to lose my job.
959
01:02:21,023 --> 01:02:22,582
You hate your job.
960
01:02:22,743 --> 01:02:24,422
Yeah, but that and my thumbs
are the only things
961
01:02:24,582 --> 01:02:26,822
separating me from the animals.
962
01:02:28,223 --> 01:02:29,302
Besides, I could get arrested.
963
01:02:29,463 --> 01:02:32,261
I am not doing this,
and I'm not gonna feel bad about it.
964
01:02:32,422 --> 01:02:34,661
And there's nothing you can say
to change my mind.
965
01:02:37,102 --> 01:02:38,141
Hey.
966
01:02:38,782 --> 01:02:40,701
Taking a test drive, Hal.
967
01:02:52,541 --> 01:02:53,980
May I drive?
968
01:02:56,181 --> 01:02:57,180
No.
969
01:02:58,900 --> 01:03:00,139
Okay.
970
01:03:00,300 --> 01:03:03,019
♪ Love is a game for two to play ♪
971
01:03:03,180 --> 01:03:05,699
♪ Don't go wishing your life away ♪
972
01:03:05,860 --> 01:03:08,139
♪ Come on now ♪
973
01:03:08,300 --> 01:03:11,579
♪ The race ain't run ♪
974
01:03:11,740 --> 01:03:14,018
♪ Love is a game ♪
975
01:03:14,180 --> 01:03:16,178
♪ Games can be fun ♪
976
01:03:18,179 --> 01:03:20,618
♪ Love is a game for two to win ♪
977
01:03:20,779 --> 01:03:23,778
♪ Walking along with a great big grin ♪
978
01:03:23,939 --> 01:03:25,938
♪ Come on now ♪
979
01:03:26,099 --> 01:03:28,458
♪ Take a run at the sun ♪
980
01:03:29,738 --> 01:03:32,057
We're taking the car, honey!
981
01:03:32,698 --> 01:03:34,257
(WHOOPING)
982
01:03:41,977 --> 01:03:46,136
(TIRES SCREECHING)
983
01:03:55,296 --> 01:03:57,175
Do you know
where she might go to get married?
984
01:03:57,336 --> 01:03:59,815
Only one place she would go.
985
01:04:00,056 --> 01:04:01,975
♪ Come on now ♪
986
01:04:02,136 --> 01:04:04,055
♪ The deal ain't done ♪
987
01:04:05,655 --> 01:04:07,935
♪ Love is a game ♪
988
01:04:08,096 --> 01:04:10,255
♪ Games can be fun ♪
989
01:04:12,415 --> 01:04:15,655
♪ Pretty soon you'll find yourself ♪
990
01:04:15,815 --> 01:04:18,854
♪ Hoppin' skippin' and jumpin' ♪
991
01:04:19,015 --> 01:04:21,254
♪ Turning somersaults ♪
992
01:04:21,415 --> 01:04:23,893
♪ With that heart ♪
♪ a-thump, thump, thumpin' ♪
993
01:04:24,054 --> 01:04:27,253
♪ Love is a game for two to play ♪
994
01:04:27,414 --> 01:04:29,693
♪ Don't go wishing your life away ♪
995
01:04:29,854 --> 01:04:32,013
♪ Come on now ♪
996
01:04:32,174 --> 01:04:34,693
♪ The song ain't sung ♪
997
01:04:35,173 --> 01:04:38,093
♪ Love is a game ♪
998
01:04:38,254 --> 01:04:41,293
♪ Games can be fun ♪
999
01:04:41,453 --> 01:04:44,332
♪ Love is a game ♪
1000
01:04:44,493 --> 01:04:46,172
♪ Games should be fun ♪
1001
01:04:47,413 --> 01:04:49,971
♪ Love is a game ♪
1002
01:04:50,132 --> 01:04:53,811
♪ Games can be fun ♪
1003
01:04:57,732 --> 01:05:00,650
- Hey. What do you think?
- Nice.
1004
01:05:00,812 --> 01:05:03,091
Hey, so what's their deal?
Are they, like, a thing?
1005
01:05:03,251 --> 01:05:06,931
- Like, weirdo and weirdette?
- No. No. They're just roomies.
1006
01:05:08,012 --> 01:05:10,050
What about you and Anderson?
1007
01:05:10,211 --> 01:05:12,170
Oh, yeah. We make out once in a while.
1008
01:05:13,411 --> 01:05:15,930
Hey, no, we've been friends
since seventh grade homeroom.
1009
01:05:16,091 --> 01:05:20,529
We entered a talent show together
as Wayne and Garth. I was Garth.
1010
01:05:21,650 --> 01:05:24,569
You guys must be pretty close if you're
willing to steal a car for him.
1011
01:05:25,731 --> 01:05:29,689
We did not steal a car. We're just
on a very, very long test drive.
1012
01:05:29,849 --> 01:05:31,609
Hey, can I ask you a question?
1013
01:05:31,769 --> 01:05:32,849
Sure.
1014
01:05:34,289 --> 01:05:38,008
You know, he's had it pretty tough
last year, and...
1015
01:05:41,329 --> 01:05:45,008
Ted, I'm not gonna hurt him.
1016
01:05:46,009 --> 01:05:48,287
Yeah, 'cause he's an idiot, you know?
1017
01:05:48,449 --> 01:05:49,968
But he's my best friend.
1018
01:05:50,129 --> 01:05:52,728
Someone's gotta watch his back.
1019
01:05:58,088 --> 01:05:59,086
Hey!
1020
01:05:59,728 --> 01:06:00,726
Hey.
1021
01:06:02,127 --> 01:06:04,206
- Hello.
- That's it?
1022
01:06:04,368 --> 01:06:06,727
That's all you have to say to me,
"Hello"?
1023
01:06:06,887 --> 01:06:08,686
Hello, stranger?
1024
01:06:08,847 --> 01:06:12,806
I won't be such a stranger when I detach
your bicuspids from your alveolus.
1025
01:06:12,967 --> 01:06:15,565
- Pardon?
- (SHOUTING)
1026
01:06:20,686 --> 01:06:22,125
You ruined my life!
1027
01:06:22,286 --> 01:06:23,285
Please tell me who you are!
1028
01:06:23,446 --> 01:06:26,764
"Please tell me who you are."
I'm the Grim Reaper, ass clam!
1029
01:06:29,005 --> 01:06:30,005
William!
1030
01:06:30,166 --> 01:06:32,044
William! What are you doing?
1031
01:06:32,206 --> 01:06:34,204
Exacting my vengeance!
1032
01:06:36,765 --> 01:06:39,923
Again, Katie, would you like
to make the introductions?
1033
01:06:41,005 --> 01:06:42,884
Anderson, this is William, my...
1034
01:06:43,045 --> 01:06:44,323
Wife! Wife! I'm her wife!
1035
01:06:44,484 --> 01:06:48,004
I mean, she's my wife! To be!
We're engaged!
1036
01:06:48,444 --> 01:06:51,363
- What?
- You didn't tell him?
1037
01:06:52,963 --> 01:06:55,003
I asked her to marry me three days ago.
1038
01:06:55,163 --> 01:06:56,163
I never said yes.
1039
01:06:56,324 --> 01:06:57,362
You accepted a balloon bouquet from me!
1040
01:06:57,523 --> 01:06:59,882
In a court of law,
that's the same thing as saying yes.
1041
01:07:00,044 --> 01:07:03,322
- I don't think that's true.
- Is there a problem here, folks?
1042
01:07:03,963 --> 01:07:06,122
Oh, no. There's no
problem here, Officer.
1043
01:07:06,283 --> 01:07:07,322
HAL: This is him.
1044
01:07:07,483 --> 01:07:09,882
And he said he was just going
for a test drive, see?
1045
01:07:11,163 --> 01:07:12,122
Excuse me.
1046
01:07:23,082 --> 01:07:25,001
You folks move along now, all right?
1047
01:07:25,162 --> 01:07:28,960
Okay, Officer. Thanks.
We're gonna get going. Bye.
1048
01:07:34,881 --> 01:07:36,439
(SIREN SOUNDS)
1049
01:07:37,641 --> 01:07:38,759
TED: Oh, my.
1050
01:07:42,281 --> 01:07:44,199
This could be really bad.
1051
01:07:46,120 --> 01:07:48,879
Hi, Mom? Guess where I am.
1052
01:07:54,959 --> 01:07:57,278
- Oh, my word.
- What is it, Mother?
1053
01:07:57,439 --> 01:08:01,158
Anderson's in trouble.
It's that girl, I just know it.
1054
01:08:03,239 --> 01:08:06,118
All right, you two,
we're gonna have to cut it short.
1055
01:08:07,199 --> 01:08:12,077
- Haven't we taught that boy values?
- There's lemonade in the fridge.
1056
01:08:18,638 --> 01:08:21,716
Welcome to Tuxedo Depot.
I'm Bill, I'll be your conductor.
1057
01:08:21,878 --> 01:08:23,997
How can I help you reach
your formal wear destination?
1058
01:08:24,157 --> 01:08:27,596
You can help me by shutting up, Bill.
This is a stickup.
1059
01:08:28,917 --> 01:08:30,476
We don't want your money.
1060
01:08:38,596 --> 01:08:39,835
What do you think?
1061
01:08:39,996 --> 01:08:42,115
I think you look great.
Doesn't he look great?
1062
01:08:42,276 --> 01:08:45,555
- Yeah, he looks great.
- Yeah, great. Fantastic.
1063
01:08:45,716 --> 01:08:47,955
Pizza. Gotcha.
1064
01:08:48,116 --> 01:08:51,194
Pizza, you're under arrest.
1065
01:09:11,994 --> 01:09:13,353
So,
1066
01:09:13,513 --> 01:09:17,313
Katie tells me, you know,
you're some sort of circus...
1067
01:09:17,474 --> 01:09:18,592
Freak?
1068
01:09:20,354 --> 01:09:22,352
Yeah, I think that's the word she used.
1069
01:09:23,113 --> 01:09:26,432
Yeah, I guess there aren't a lot of
girls that spend their weekends
1070
01:09:26,593 --> 01:09:29,952
- learning how to breathe fire.
- No.
1071
01:09:31,392 --> 01:09:34,431
How do you breathe fire?
1072
01:09:34,593 --> 01:09:37,111
Well, it's like the old saying,
1073
01:09:37,272 --> 01:09:40,591
you just pucker your lips and blow.
1074
01:09:43,872 --> 01:09:46,430
And then, of course,
you try not to inhale the propellant,
1075
01:09:46,591 --> 01:09:48,830
'cause you can collapse a lung.
1076
01:09:50,711 --> 01:09:54,390
POLICEMAN: All units. All units. 10-16
in progress. 10-16 at Tuxedo Depot.
1077
01:09:54,551 --> 01:09:55,670
Damn it.
1078
01:09:55,831 --> 01:09:57,430
All right,
we're moving out of here real slow.
1079
01:09:57,591 --> 01:10:00,029
Nobody say nothing,
nobody do nothing, nobody gets hurt.
1080
01:10:00,190 --> 01:10:02,389
Thank you. You've been very nice.
1081
01:10:03,790 --> 01:10:04,790
(SIREN BLARING)
1082
01:10:04,950 --> 01:10:07,629
- POLICEMAN: Freeze!
- Freeze! Put your hands on your head!
1083
01:10:28,028 --> 01:10:30,587
You've had a tough couple of days, huh?
1084
01:10:32,629 --> 01:10:35,867
Aside from being hit by a car
and assaulted by an orthodontist,
1085
01:10:36,028 --> 01:10:38,107
hasn't been too bad.
1086
01:10:38,267 --> 01:10:42,347
I'm sorry about William.
He's usually a nice guy.
1087
01:10:42,508 --> 01:10:45,507
You know, it's funny you say that,
because I remember thinking
1088
01:10:45,667 --> 01:10:49,466
as he was kicking me in the face,
"Hey, this guy is pretty nice."
1089
01:10:49,627 --> 01:10:51,066
I'll shut up.
1090
01:10:52,987 --> 01:10:54,906
You know, I just think
1091
01:10:55,067 --> 01:10:57,745
maybe the world is trying
to tell us something.
1092
01:10:59,546 --> 01:11:00,825
Well, like what?
1093
01:11:01,946 --> 01:11:04,745
Like, maybe you can't look across
a crowded restaurant,
1094
01:11:04,906 --> 01:11:08,905
find the person you're supposed
to spend the rest of your life with.
1095
01:11:09,145 --> 01:11:10,384
SMITTY: Hey.
You didn't read me my rights.
1096
01:11:10,545 --> 01:11:13,784
- LOIS: And what are those handcuffs...
- Not my problem. Tell it to the judge.
1097
01:11:13,945 --> 01:11:15,704
- SMITTY: Hey, put them in the front.
- LOIS: Get a space heater...
1098
01:11:15,865 --> 01:11:17,384
- SMITTY: I demand to be Mirandized.
- Oh, my God!
1099
01:11:17,545 --> 01:11:19,384
- Oh, my God!
- Holy shit!
1100
01:11:19,544 --> 01:11:20,544
- Mom?
- Katie!
1101
01:11:20,705 --> 01:11:22,423
- Baby Bear!
- Dad!
1102
01:11:22,584 --> 01:11:24,663
Anderson, this is my dad!
1103
01:11:24,825 --> 01:11:29,104
Hi. Hi. Nice to meet you.
1104
01:11:29,265 --> 01:11:30,423
Excuse the jewelry.
1105
01:11:30,584 --> 01:11:32,543
- What are you doing here?
- We stole a car!
1106
01:11:32,703 --> 01:11:34,263
- Allegedly.
- Oh, good for you!
1107
01:11:34,424 --> 01:11:36,783
All of you, pipe down!
1108
01:11:36,944 --> 01:11:39,383
This guy's fugitive ass
is going back to the big house.
1109
01:11:39,544 --> 01:11:41,983
- I'm sorry, your dad's a fugitive?
- Yep.
1110
01:11:42,663 --> 01:11:43,783
Okay. All right. Come on, let's go.
1111
01:11:43,944 --> 01:11:45,782
- Come to me, baby.
- Daddy!
1112
01:11:46,903 --> 01:11:49,062
- SMITTY: So good to see you.
- KATIE: You, too.
1113
01:11:49,223 --> 01:11:51,702
- Mom. Dad.
- Oh, my God!
1114
01:11:51,863 --> 01:11:53,942
Who the hot springs are you people?
1115
01:11:54,102 --> 01:11:55,821
We're his parents.
1116
01:11:55,983 --> 01:11:58,981
- Hey.
- Nice to see you again, Katie.
1117
01:11:59,142 --> 01:12:01,621
Hi, Mommy?
1118
01:12:01,781 --> 01:12:04,501
Mom, Dad, these are Katie's parents.
1119
01:12:05,462 --> 01:12:08,980
Why are Katie's parents in the hoosegow?
1120
01:12:09,142 --> 01:12:11,300
- Yeah. Mom?
- He kidnapped me.
1121
01:12:11,461 --> 01:12:13,940
He kidnapped me from my Stuart.
1122
01:12:14,101 --> 01:12:17,460
What are you talking about?
Baby, what are you doing?
1123
01:12:17,621 --> 01:12:18,860
Mom, Dad, stop!
1124
01:12:19,740 --> 01:12:21,579
Back me up. No, no!
1125
01:12:21,741 --> 01:12:23,579
(ALL CLAMORING)
1126
01:12:24,661 --> 01:12:26,580
(SCREAMING)
1127
01:12:27,060 --> 01:12:28,579
All right, freeze!
1128
01:12:29,420 --> 01:12:31,619
- You freeze!
- Mom!
1129
01:12:31,780 --> 01:12:33,699
No. You drop that gun!
You drop that gun!
1130
01:12:33,860 --> 01:12:35,818
Put down the piece.
I will blow you away.
1131
01:12:35,979 --> 01:12:37,738
I will seriously wound this jackass!
Don't you think I won't!
1132
01:12:37,899 --> 01:12:40,098
I will violate your bodily organs
with tempered steel!
1133
01:12:40,259 --> 01:12:42,458
I am Little Bear, protecting her brood!
1134
01:12:42,619 --> 01:12:44,818
- Put that down! Put down the gun, now!
- You don't think I would do this?
1135
01:12:44,978 --> 01:12:48,258
To preserve the rule of law,
I will gladly sacrifice this man!
1136
01:12:49,138 --> 01:12:50,097
What?
1137
01:12:52,178 --> 01:12:55,217
- Mom?
- Not now, sweetheart. Drop it!
1138
01:12:55,378 --> 01:12:56,497
This is not police procedure!
1139
01:12:56,658 --> 01:12:57,777
- She startled me.
- Help me up!
1140
01:12:57,938 --> 01:12:59,497
Give me the keys.
Give me those keys right now
1141
01:12:59,657 --> 01:13:02,576
and get over there
before I hurt this man.
1142
01:13:02,738 --> 01:13:04,417
Sweetheart, get your jacket.
1143
01:13:04,578 --> 01:13:06,576
Go! Go! Come on! Come on!
1144
01:13:07,458 --> 01:13:08,976
The keys! The keys!
1145
01:13:09,857 --> 01:13:11,776
We're not going anywhere!
1146
01:13:12,257 --> 01:13:15,536
My son is not going
to be an accessory to a felony.
1147
01:13:15,696 --> 01:13:18,016
Will you get a load of this one?
"My son's too good for felonies."
1148
01:13:18,176 --> 01:13:19,295
You snobby bitch.
1149
01:13:19,456 --> 01:13:22,375
Lady, I have half a mind
to stick my boot right up your cooter.
1150
01:13:22,537 --> 01:13:23,615
- What?
- You...
1151
01:13:23,777 --> 01:13:27,655
(SCREAMING)
1152
01:13:27,856 --> 01:13:30,895
(GUN FIRES)
1153
01:13:32,096 --> 01:13:33,055
ANDERSON: Katie?
1154
01:13:34,295 --> 01:13:35,854
Katie, what are you doing?
1155
01:13:37,615 --> 01:13:39,854
I don't know.
1156
01:13:40,015 --> 01:13:44,614
These past few days, I haven't really
had any idea what I'm doing, Anderson.
1157
01:13:44,774 --> 01:13:48,974
But what I'm realizing is
I'm standing here shooting a stolen gun,
1158
01:13:49,135 --> 01:13:50,813
which, by the way, is pretty cool.
1159
01:13:50,974 --> 01:13:51,933
(GUN FIRES)
1160
01:13:53,134 --> 01:13:57,373
What I'm realizing is that I don't care,
1161
01:13:57,533 --> 01:14:00,613
as long as I can keep doing it
with you, Anderson.
1162
01:14:01,054 --> 01:14:03,012
Because I think you can.
1163
01:14:03,213 --> 01:14:05,812
I think you can look across
a crowded restaurant
1164
01:14:05,973 --> 01:14:09,852
and fall in love with a grubby stranger.
1165
01:14:10,012 --> 01:14:15,052
And I think love can be instantaneous
and insane.
1166
01:14:16,973 --> 01:14:21,331
So, Anderson,
for the last time I'm asking you...
1167
01:14:23,012 --> 01:14:24,651
Will you marry me?
1168
01:14:24,811 --> 01:14:26,571
- Yes.
- Yes.
1169
01:14:26,731 --> 01:14:28,171
- Yes.
- Yeah.
1170
01:14:28,332 --> 01:14:29,930
- Yes.
- Yes, say it!
1171
01:14:30,091 --> 01:14:32,170
Yes. Yes.
1172
01:14:33,891 --> 01:14:34,890
Yes!
1173
01:14:35,051 --> 01:14:37,210
(ALL CHEERING)
1174
01:14:47,930 --> 01:14:49,369
Gotta go!
1175
01:14:49,530 --> 01:14:50,889
Let's go! Come on!
1176
01:14:51,689 --> 01:14:53,208
Take the van. The keys are on the hook.
1177
01:14:53,369 --> 01:14:55,248
- Take the van.
- Thank you.
1178
01:14:58,090 --> 01:14:59,648
You go, girl!
1179
01:15:00,689 --> 01:15:01,648
Bye!
1180
01:15:04,569 --> 01:15:05,768
Don't stop believing!
1181
01:15:05,929 --> 01:15:10,607
♪ Believe, you gotta believe ♪
1182
01:15:10,768 --> 01:15:13,767
♪ Oh, you gotta believe ♪
1183
01:15:13,928 --> 01:15:16,887
♪ Got to believe ♪
1184
01:15:21,808 --> 01:15:26,767
♪ Yeah, yeah, got to believe ♪
1185
01:15:32,327 --> 01:15:34,046
(ORGAN PLAYING PROCESSIONAL)
1186
01:15:34,206 --> 01:15:35,926
How do you feel? Nervous?
1187
01:15:36,087 --> 01:15:37,525
No. I feel good.
1188
01:15:37,687 --> 01:15:39,045
(MUSIC STOPS)
1189
01:15:43,526 --> 01:15:47,565
So let me ask you, when you
met this guy, did you know?
1190
01:15:51,205 --> 01:15:55,165
Yeah. I guess I did.
1191
01:15:55,325 --> 01:15:58,244
- I love you, Daddy.
- I love you too, Baby Bear.
1192
01:16:00,804 --> 01:16:03,484
Look at me,
crying like a jailhouse bitch.
1193
01:16:06,884 --> 01:16:08,083
Stop it.
1194
01:16:19,404 --> 01:16:22,082
- Take care of my baby girl.
- I will.
1195
01:16:26,323 --> 01:16:29,122
(WHISPERING) 'Cause if you don't,
they'll never find you.
1196
01:16:33,442 --> 01:16:34,762
Thank you.
1197
01:16:38,282 --> 01:16:41,361
My name is Dr. Favreau,
1198
01:16:41,522 --> 01:16:43,201
and on behalf of my family,
1199
01:16:43,362 --> 01:16:47,241
I'd like to welcome you all
to The House of Wedded Bliss.
1200
01:16:48,322 --> 01:16:52,720
A couple who marries here,
I personally guarantee,
1201
01:16:52,881 --> 01:16:56,640
that's a marriage
that's gonna last for life.
1202
01:16:56,801 --> 01:17:01,839
And we never forget a face.
Ain't that right, Lois and Smitty?
1203
01:17:02,000 --> 01:17:02,1000
Big Bear.
1204
01:17:04,961 --> 01:17:07,359
Now, on to the business at hand.
1205
01:17:07,520 --> 01:17:11,838
Anderson, do you take this woman
to be your wife?
1206
01:17:21,840 --> 01:17:23,238
Do you?
1207
01:17:24,159 --> 01:17:25,758
Anderson?
1208
01:17:32,359 --> 01:17:34,237
Sorry. I don't.
1209
01:17:34,398 --> 01:17:37,357
Vanessa, when I met you,
I thought you were perfect.
1210
01:17:37,518 --> 01:17:40,117
And you are. I mean...
I mean, look at you.
1211
01:17:42,317 --> 01:17:47,636
But then I met Katie,
and she's perfect for me.
1212
01:17:50,077 --> 01:17:54,075
I'm sorry. Are you...
You're heartbroken.
1213
01:17:54,237 --> 01:17:57,076
Anderson, I want you to meet somebody.
1214
01:17:57,236 --> 01:17:59,076
You remember Morty, right?
1215
01:17:59,237 --> 01:18:01,075
"Shooter, shooter. We got a shooter."
1216
01:18:01,236 --> 01:18:04,555
He killed himself after I died.
Isn't that so romantic?
1217
01:18:06,156 --> 01:18:10,995
I couldn't live without her, dude.
I know, we just met. But she's the one.
1218
01:18:11,156 --> 01:18:14,875
- Know what I mean?
- Yeah, I think I do.
1219
01:18:15,036 --> 01:18:17,635
Listen, babe, we gotta blow.
I'll be in the Humvee.
1220
01:18:21,555 --> 01:18:22,794
Bye.
1221
01:18:29,514 --> 01:18:32,713
Do you want to get back
to your wedding now, son?
1222
01:18:38,113 --> 01:18:39,393
I do.
1223
01:18:42,233 --> 01:18:46,192
Son, you've got to wait
until you say "I do."
1224
01:18:48,512 --> 01:18:49,471
Son?
1225
01:18:51,793 --> 01:18:53,351
(SIGHS)
1226
01:18:53,513 --> 01:18:55,592
I do. I do. I do.
1227
01:18:55,753 --> 01:18:58,831
You got a ring? Because if you don't,
we have some splendid ones
1228
01:18:58,992 --> 01:19:00,591
in the gift shop for $19.95.
1229
01:19:00,752 --> 01:19:02,751
No. No, no, no. I have a ring.
1230
01:19:08,711 --> 01:19:10,750
I have another ring.
1231
01:19:12,791 --> 01:19:14,430
Remember this?
1232
01:19:27,750 --> 01:19:33,429
By the power vested in me,
I pronounce you husband and wife.
1233
01:19:36,870 --> 01:19:38,428
♪ Everybody's gonna love today ♪
1234
01:19:38,589 --> 01:19:40,428
♪ Gonna love today ♪
♪ gonna love today ♪
1235
01:19:40,590 --> 01:19:43,668
♪ Everybody's gonna love today ♪
♪ Gonna love today ♪
1236
01:19:43,829 --> 01:19:47,468
♪ Anyway you want to ♪
♪ Anyway you've got to ♪
1237
01:19:47,628 --> 01:19:53,427
♪ Love, love me ♪
♪ Love, love me ♪
1238
01:19:53,588 --> 01:19:54,547
(SIREN SOUNDS)
1239
01:19:54,708 --> 01:19:56,947
- SHERIFF: All right, freeze!
- I LoJacked your ass.
1240
01:19:57,108 --> 01:19:59,347
That's him right there!
Arrest him! Arrest him!
1241
01:19:59,508 --> 01:20:00,867
- Arrest him!
- All right. Hey!
1242
01:20:01,028 --> 01:20:03,787
- That is my ear, my friend.
- Sorry.
1243
01:20:03,947 --> 01:20:06,067
How would you like it
if I did that to you?
1244
01:20:06,228 --> 01:20:09,306
- I said I'm sorry.
- Alrighty.
1245
01:20:09,467 --> 01:20:11,986
On a personal note,
1246
01:20:12,147 --> 01:20:15,106
I understand we have
some newlyweds here.
1247
01:20:15,267 --> 01:20:16,506
Yes. Yes, sir. That's...
1248
01:20:18,707 --> 01:20:23,025
I'd like to offer the congratulations
of myself and the whole team.
1249
01:20:23,186 --> 01:20:24,145
- Thank you very much. Thank you.
- That's nice.
1250
01:20:24,306 --> 01:20:25,665
- It is.
- That's cool.
1251
01:20:31,105 --> 01:20:32,904
We didn't know
where you were registered.
1252
01:20:33,065 --> 01:20:34,024
Oh, wow.
1253
01:20:34,186 --> 01:20:37,184
It's a blender.
I had some help picking it out.
1254
01:20:38,626 --> 01:20:39,824
William?
1255
01:20:40,585 --> 01:20:42,544
I realized something today, Katie.
1256
01:20:42,705 --> 01:20:45,424
No matter how hard you try
to plan your life,
1257
01:20:45,585 --> 01:20:49,783
life has a plan for you all its own.
1258
01:20:49,944 --> 01:20:51,183
Good luck.
1259
01:20:51,344 --> 01:20:53,943
- Thank you, guys.
- Guys, thank you.
1260
01:20:54,104 --> 01:20:55,863
Why is he hugging the cop?
1261
01:20:56,864 --> 01:20:57,823
Okay, guys, now.
1262
01:20:57,983 --> 01:20:59,342
- Very nice.
- No, seriously,
1263
01:20:59,503 --> 01:21:01,862
- why is he hugging the cop?
- All right.
1264
01:21:04,143 --> 01:21:07,702
On a professional note,
y'all are under arrest.
1265
01:21:07,863 --> 01:21:09,862
Right. Just...
1266
01:21:10,023 --> 01:21:13,022
Considering we might not all be
together again for quite some time,
1267
01:21:13,183 --> 01:21:16,462
Katie and I were hoping to get a picture
before we all go off to the big house.
1268
01:21:16,622 --> 01:21:19,101
- What a great idea.
- The big house.
1269
01:21:19,262 --> 01:21:20,741
- You want me to do it?
- Would you?
1270
01:21:20,902 --> 01:21:22,421
- All right.
- Oh, come on!
1271
01:21:22,582 --> 01:21:26,581
Hey! You know, you are walking
on thin ice here, my friend!
1272
01:21:26,742 --> 01:21:29,341
You are on very thin ice!
1273
01:21:31,142 --> 01:21:32,140
Let me see it.
1274
01:21:32,301 --> 01:21:34,380
Don't forget to push the button
for the flash.
1275
01:21:34,541 --> 01:21:36,340
Get in here, you guys.
1276
01:21:39,061 --> 01:21:40,700
SHERIFF: Could you
all just scooch in a little?
1277
01:21:40,861 --> 01:21:44,020
One, two,
1278
01:21:44,180 --> 01:21:45,419
three.
1279
01:21:45,580 --> 01:21:49,100
♪ I love love ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
1280
01:21:49,260 --> 01:21:52,619
♪ I don't care what it does to me ♪
1281
01:21:52,780 --> 01:21:56,099
♪ Take these tattered boxes ♪
♪ that used to hold your clothes ♪
1282
01:21:56,259 --> 01:22:00,138
♪ Break them down ♪
♪ Build them back up with your bones ♪
1283
01:22:00,299 --> 01:22:04,138
♪ Now all you do is construct a mess ♪
♪ You're good to me when only flesh ♪
1284
01:22:04,299 --> 01:22:07,858
♪ You're a memory with nothing to show ♪
1285
01:22:08,019 --> 01:22:09,538
♪ When we would take trips ♪
1286
01:22:09,698 --> 01:22:11,617
♪ We swore we'd never take pictures ♪
1287
01:22:11,778 --> 01:22:15,657
♪ Pictures only prove ♪
♪ you can't convince ♪
1288
01:22:15,818 --> 01:22:17,737
♪ Now I wish those photographs ♪
1289
01:22:17,898 --> 01:22:20,497
♪ Could convince you that ♪
♪ what we had would only ♪
1290
01:22:20,657 --> 01:22:22,257
♪ Turn out a negative ♪
1291
01:22:22,418 --> 01:22:24,256
♪ Well well well ♪
1292
01:22:24,418 --> 01:22:27,617
♪ If fingertips are relationships ♪
1293
01:22:27,778 --> 01:22:31,976
♪ Then I could barely carry your weight ♪
1294
01:22:32,137 --> 01:22:34,216
♪ If fingers are mistakes ♪
1295
01:22:34,376 --> 01:22:37,415
♪ Don't use this one ♪
♪ to point the blame ♪
1296
01:22:37,577 --> 01:22:41,135
♪ Just sing sing ♪
1297
01:22:41,296 --> 01:22:44,815
♪ I love love ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
1298
01:22:44,976 --> 01:22:47,495
♪ I don't care what it does to me ♪
1299
01:22:47,656 --> 01:22:50,055
♪ These pills are fine to pass the time ♪
1300
01:22:50,216 --> 01:22:52,374
♪ Til I find my new drug ♪
1301
01:22:52,536 --> 01:22:56,295
♪ We'll take our chances ♪
♪ We'll last a month ♪
1302
01:22:56,455 --> 01:23:00,934
♪ We'll never speak again ♪
♪ How I love being in love ♪
1303
01:23:15,374 --> 01:23:17,453
♪ And don't pick up the line ♪
1304
01:23:17,614 --> 01:23:19,693
♪ You're dressed to have a good time ♪
1305
01:23:19,854 --> 01:23:23,173
♪ You don't need him ♪
♪ You need to be seen ♪
1306
01:23:23,333 --> 01:23:27,772
♪ So someone else can treat you wrong ♪
♪ So you my love can sing this song ♪
1307
01:23:27,933 --> 01:23:31,691
♪ I love love ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
1308
01:23:31,853 --> 01:23:34,972
♪ I don't care what it does to me ♪
1309
01:23:35,132 --> 01:23:38,691
♪ These pills are fine to pass the time ♪
♪ til I find my new drug ♪
1310
01:23:38,852 --> 01:23:42,531
♪ Then they'll take advantage ♪
♪ I'll claim that's what I want ♪
1311
01:23:42,692 --> 01:23:46,771
♪ To be the new statistic ♪
♪ How I love ♪
1312
01:23:46,931 --> 01:23:51,691
♪ How I love ♪
♪ How I love being in love ♪
1313
01:23:58,491 --> 01:24:02,130
♪ Take these tattered boxes ♪
♪ That used to hold your clothes ♪
1314
01:24:02,290 --> 01:24:06,129
♪ Break them down ♪
♪ Build them back up with your bones ♪
1315
01:24:06,290 --> 01:24:08,769
♪ All you did was construct a mess ♪
1316
01:24:08,930 --> 01:24:10,209
♪ You're dead to me if love is death ♪
1317
01:24:10,370 --> 01:24:13,248
♪ You're a memory ♪
♪ with nothing to show ♪
1318
01:24:13,410 --> 01:24:14,449
♪ Well well well ♪
1319
01:24:14,610 --> 01:24:18,728
♪ If fingertips are relationships then ♪
1320
01:24:19,090 --> 01:24:22,568
♪ Maybe I could use a break ♪
1321
01:24:22,729 --> 01:24:23,808
♪ She smiles ♪
1322
01:24:23,969 --> 01:24:28,128
♪ She points at me, she says ♪
♪ "Baby I love how you sing" ♪
1323
01:24:28,289 --> 01:24:31,048
♪ So just sing ♪
1324
01:24:31,208 --> 01:24:34,927
♪ I love love ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
1325
01:24:35,088 --> 01:24:38,847
♪ I don't care what it does to me ♪
1326
01:24:39,288 --> 01:24:42,886
♪ I love love ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
1327
01:24:43,048 --> 01:24:45,926
♪ I don't care what it does to me ♪
1328
01:24:46,088 --> 01:24:50,566
♪ These pills are fine to pass the time ♪
♪ Till I find my new drug ♪
1329
01:24:50,727 --> 01:24:54,366
♪ We'll take our chances ♪
♪ We'll rise above ♪
1330
01:24:54,527 --> 01:24:56,766
♪ We'll last until the end ♪
1331
01:24:56,927 --> 01:25:02,685
♪ I love how, I love how ♪
♪ I love being in love ♪
1332
01:25:03,007 --> 01:25:06,365
♪ Just me and my puppy ♪
1333
01:25:06,526 --> 01:25:09,645
♪ Together we're so very happy ♪
1334
01:25:09,806 --> 01:25:14,205
♪ And the bitter world ♪
♪ won't bring us down ♪
1335
01:25:14,366 --> 01:25:17,844
♪ No, I'm looking on ♪
♪ the bright side of things ♪
1336
01:25:19,165 --> 01:25:22,604
♪ It's just me and my honey ♪
1337
01:25:22,765 --> 01:25:26,404
♪ Together we are so very funny ♪
1338
01:25:26,565 --> 01:25:30,523
♪ And the bitter world ♪
♪ won't bring us down ♪
1339
01:25:30,685 --> 01:25:34,763
♪ No, I'm looking on ♪
♪ the bright side of things ♪
1340
01:25:34,924 --> 01:25:37,643
♪ And nothing will be ♪
1341
01:25:37,804 --> 01:25:41,162
♪ Taken from my hands now ♪
1342
01:25:41,323 --> 01:25:43,163
♪ Within me ♪
1343
01:25:43,324 --> 01:25:45,282
♪ Resistance from me ♪
1344
01:25:45,443 --> 01:25:49,082
♪ Nothing can last ♪
♪ How can I pass ♪
1345
01:25:49,243 --> 01:25:53,242
♪ On love and understanding ♪
1346
01:25:53,403 --> 01:25:58,881
♪ Oh oh oh oh ♪
♪ It's just me and my guitar ♪
1347
01:25:59,042 --> 01:26:02,522
♪ Together we'll go so very far ♪
1348
01:26:02,682 --> 01:26:06,961
♪ And the bitter world ♪
♪ won't bring us down ♪
1349
01:26:07,122 --> 01:26:11,961
♪ No, I'm looking on ♪
♪ the bright side of things ♪
1350
01:26:28,041 --> 01:26:29,479
♪ Here we go now ♪
1351
01:26:43,120 --> 01:26:45,958
♪ And nothing will be ♪
1352
01:26:46,119 --> 01:26:49,518
♪ Taken from my hands now ♪
1353
01:26:49,679 --> 01:26:53,437
♪ Within me ♪
♪ A resistance from me ♪
1354
01:26:53,598 --> 01:26:57,557
♪ Nothing can last ♪
♪ How can I pass ♪
1355
01:26:57,718 --> 01:27:01,517
♪ On love and understanding ♪
1356
01:27:01,678 --> 01:27:03,677
♪ Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh ♪
1357
01:27:03,837 --> 01:27:07,197
♪ It's just me and the town ♪
1358
01:27:07,358 --> 01:27:10,836
♪ Together we will be the champs ♪
1359
01:27:10,997 --> 01:27:14,676
♪ And the bitter world ♪
♪ won't bring us down ♪
1360
01:27:14,837 --> 01:27:18,196
♪ No, I'm looking on ♪
♪ the bright side of things ♪
1361
01:27:18,357 --> 01:27:25,356
♪ I'm looking on ♪
♪ the bright side of things ♪
1362
01:27:25,516 --> 01:27:29,555
♪ I'm looking on the ♪
♪ bright side of things ♪
104931
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