Original subtitles

[bell rings]

? When I wake up in the morning and the alarm gives out a warning ?

? I don't think I'll ever make it on time ?

? By the time I grab my books and I give myself a look ?

? I'm at the corner just in time to see the bus fly by ?

? It's all right ?

? 'Cause I'm saved by the bell ?

? If the teacher pops a test I know I'm in a mess ?

? And my dog ate all my homework last night ?

? Ridin' low on my chair, she won't know that I'm there ?

? If I can hand it in tomorrow it will be all right ?

? It's all right ?

? 'Cause I'm saved by the bell... ?

? It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the-- ?

? It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the-- ?

? It's all right, 'cause I'm saved by the bell ?

[cheering]

Congratulations, A.C. Slater.

Now, tell me, how does it feel to be city wrestling champ?

Pretty darn good, Zack,

but not as good as it's gonna feel next week

when I win the state championship.

? A.C. Slater, he's first rate ?

? Today the city, next week state ?

Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

Now, Slater, tell me.

How does it feel to totally humiliate Valley's champ?

Pretty darn good, Zack.

? They set you up with the best they had ?

? You pounced 'em, trounced 'em, beat 'em up bad ?

Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

Any final words before we sign off?

I'd like to thank Coach Sanski and my teammates for their support,

and even though he couldn't be here, I'd like to thank my dad.

? Zippity, zappity, piffity, paddy ?

? He's so straight, he thanked his daddy ?

Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

This has been Zack Morris for KKTY Sports.

Next week, a special report on cheerleaders who need to get a life.

Hey, you're looking good in that miniskirt, mama.

Why don't you go bite a stray dog?

I'm only a cheerleader because it looks good on my college application.

Have you heard anything yet?

No. Colleges don't usually tell you if you're accepted until next week.

Not true.

I already got accepted to four schools.

Emerson, USC, Clemson--

I applied to Harvard, Yale, and Columbia.

Ivy League schools are more careful about who they accept.

Then I guess some crazed gardener cut down the Ivy at Princeton,

'cause I got in there, too.

Princeton accepted you and I haven't heard anything yet?

I need junk food quick.

Give me those fries.

Relax. At least you can afford those colleges.

I'm going to community college and getting a job.

Besides, pigging out will only get you a curly tail and a snout.

- Oink, oink. - Oink, oink.

Don't give me attitude just because you already got into the Fashion Institute.

I know how you feel.

I haven't heard from any of my schools, either.

What did you do? Apply to the places with the best-looking girls?

How did you know?

I also applied to the schools with the best beaches--

Hawaii, Miami, and Tahiti Tech.

Man, I don't believe it. That's Jeff Tramer,

the wrestling coach from the University of Iowa.

Wonder what he's doing here.

It is a restaurant.

Maybe he's hungry. Duh!

Iowa is the best wresting school in the country.

Maybe he's here about my application.

Slater, colleges never accept people in person.

A.C., I'm Jeff Tramer.

I'm here to offer you a full wrestling scholarship to the University of Iowa.

Well, what do you say?

Huh? Oh, I say great. Thank you.

I'll put that paperwork in the mail tomorrow.

See you in September. You'll love Iowa.

Congratulations.

Iowa. The land of farmers' daughters.

Yeah. Well done, Slater.

What a day. City champ, now Iowa.

I can't wait to tell my father.

Hey, preppy, come with me so you can tell him how good I was.

OK.

See you guys at the bowling alley later.

Not me. Last time we went,

some biker shoved his fingers up my nose

and used my head as a bowling ball.

Man, it hurts when you get a strike.

Down and give me 20!

1, 2...

I hate when you do that, A.C.

Hey, Dad, I'm just getting you back

for all the times you woke me up with your bugle.

- Hi, son. - Hey, Dad.

Good to see you, Private Morris.

Yo, Major Slater.

Being all you can be?

Careful, soldier.

So, Dad, when'd you get back?

Just got in.

Sorry I had to miss your big wrestling match.

- How'd you do? - Oh, he did great.

Slater pinned that girl in 10 seconds.

Shut up, Preppie.

It was a guy, and I creamed him.

That's my boy.

Son, I've got great news.

Oh, wait, I've got some good news, too.

Uh-uh. I outrank you. Me first.

Tomorrow, 1200 hours, you have an interview with Congressman Shepherd

for possible entry to the West Point Military Academy.

West Point?

Oh, that's great, Dad. Just great.

I knew you'd be thrilled.

I called in some favors.

You're worth it, soldier.

Slater, come on. Tell him.

Iowa?

Iowa?

Yeah. I owe, uh, Zack 10 bucks.

Could you loan it to me?

Oh, sure. That's good news?

Is to me.

[telephone rings]

Major Slater.

Uh-huh.

Oh, I see.

All right. I'll be right over.

What's the matter?

My C.O. went AWOL with a G.I. From the P.X.

I got to go ASAP.

See you, A.C.

OK.

You guys sound like an eye chart.

Why didn't you tell him about your wrestling scholarship?

Zack, it's always been his dream for me to be in the army.

Hey, you do not want to be in the army.

You'd look stupid with a crew cut.

I know.

I want to go to Iowa.

Don't worry. I'll get you out of this.

Jesse, what are you doing eating potato chips at 9:00 in the morning?

Oh, no. Did another school reject you?

Only Yale. Who wants to go there?

Stupid school.

I haven't heard from my first choice, either,

but I got accepted to three more:

Duke, Cal-tech,

and the Barbizon School for Modeling.

You, a fashion model?

Fashion model?

I thought the School for Modeling was where you put together plastic airplanes.

Forget this.

Mr. Belding, thank you for letting me borrow your office to do this interview.

Believe me, Congressman Shepherd, it's an honor.

You could not have picked a better candidate.

I consider A.C. Slater to be my prot�g�.

I groomed him myself.

Well, I won't hold that against him.

Just kidding.

I hope so. You're up for re-election next month.

Congressman Shepherd, I'm A.C. Slater.

You know, A.C., Martin really thinks you're officer material.

I trust his opinion.

What, uh... Martin?

Major Martin Slater.

Your father?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, I just call him Major Dad.

So, what do you think of West Point?

I think it's the greatest military school in the history of this world.

When do I get my gun?

There's more to the army than just guns--

education, career training, unlimited opportunities.

Yeah. Opportunities to meet the enemy girls

'cause I hear those commie chicks are red hot.

We're not actually at war right now.

Good.

Then we should attack Canada!

They'll never know we're coming.

Yeah, yeah, I could see it now.

We'll creep into the woods outside of Toronto.

I have the enemy in my sights.

Take this!

Take that! And that!

It's a vicious fire fight!

Machine guns! Duh-duh-duh-duh!

Oh!

Mortars! Bazookas!

Oh!

It's beautiful, man. And after we overrun them,

I jump on our lead tank

and ride victoriously through the streets of Toronto,

singing our national anthem.

? Oh, say, can you see ?

? By the dawn's early light ?

A.C., thank you for coming.

I'll be in touch.

Jessie, where were you?

We missed you at lunch.

I went home to check the mail for more acceptance letters.

Did you hear from another school?

Yes.

I guess that means you didn't get in.

You're a zit ready to happen.

I'm sorry, Jessie. What school dumped you this time?

Only Harvard. I didn't want to go there anyway.

Don't give up. You still haven't heard about Columbia.

Forget it. I'm doomed.

I'm going to end up snapping my gum behind the counter at McDonald's.

Great. Just today, I was accepted to a Hamburger University.

Maybe I'll be your McBoss.

Hey, Slater.

Slater, how was your interview?

How would he know? He wasn't there.

Well, it was, uh...

Hey, Slater, congratulations.

You failed your interview with flying colors.

He bought it? How?

Let's just say I made Rambo look like a wimp.

Thanks, Preppie. I owe you one.

You took the interview for him?

That's not right, Zack.

I can't believe you'd throw away an opportunity like that, Slater.

You just better hope nobody finds out.

What's the worst that would happen?

They find out he lied, and they still don't let him in.

[bell rings]

Congratulations.

All right. Thanks.

On top of the desk?

That doesn't sound like him at all.

He's usually polite. Sweet, even.

Wonder what came over him?

Hey, Mr. B.

A.C.

You have more than one A.C. here?

No. Just him.

That's the student you interviewed... isn't it?

No, it isn't.

Well, then somebody pretended to be A.C.,

and I've got a pretty good idea who that somebody is.

Come with me. We've got to talk.

Sorry to interrupt, Mr. McGee,

but we need a moment with one of your students.

Well...

Zack, I'd like for you to try this on.

Not right now, sir. I'm learning here.

Can't this wait?

Is this the boy?

Yes, it is.

Then there's nothing I can do.

They're all yours.

Zack Morris, you are accused of impersonating

a West Point applicant to a United States congressman.

A.C. Slater, you are accused of aiding and abetting

a person impersonating a West Point applicant

to a United States congressman.

Oh, man. I knew something like this would happen.

We're just kids. You can't do this.

Do something, Mr. Belding.

I'm sorry, Zack, it's out of my hands.

In the name of the government of the United States of America,

you are hereby under arrest.

You will come with us.

I didn't do anything!

I'm too young to go to prison!

I want that homework when you get out of jail!

Why did I listen to you?

Every time I listen to you, I get into trouble.

When am I gonna learn?

- When? - Ow!

Hey...

relax.

Mr. B.--

Hey, sorry, guys.

This time you went too far.

You're looking at 10 years, gentlemen.

What?

Oh, please! I can't go to prison!

They'll eat me alive!

Would you shut up and take it like a man?

I'm embarrassed to be handcuffed to you.

Gonna have to call your father now, A.C.

No, don't, Mr. B!

Mr. Congressman, no, please!

I think they've learned their lesson.

I think they have.

All right, guys, let them go.

This whole thing was a scam?

You did this to teach us a lesson?

Yeah. Did it work?

- Yeah. - Oh, yeah.

A.C., if you ever want a real interview, let me know.

All right, guys. Let's go.

Well, thanks for the great lesson, sir.

See you later.

Not so fast, Zack.

The congressman was a lot more forgiving than I'm going to be.

Wait, Mr. B., don't blame Zack.

This whole thing happened because I was too chicken to tell my dad

I didn't want to go to West Point.

Yeah. I was just helping him.

I was being a nice guy.

I should get a medal.

Slater, are you sure?

All right, Zack.

As much as it pains me, get out of here.

Thank you, sir.

And, please, don't be too hard on Slater.

He just needs a little discipline.

Sit down, A.C.

Slater, Slater, Slater.

Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.

Mmm, mmm, mmm!

OK, it was wrong not to be honest with my dad.

I didn't know how he'd take it.

I'll go talk to him.

Hey, I'm glad we had this talk.

Now go ahead and make me proud.

Hi, Dad.

Well?

How did the interview go...

Cadet Slater?

Dad...

I didn't get in.

What?

That two-bit, backstabbing politician.

I'm gonna get him on the phone right now.

No, Dad, put down the phone.

I didn't get in because...

I didn't go to the interview.

What are you talking about?

I got a wrestling scholarship from the University of Iowa.

I want to go there.

What about West Point?

What about our plans?

Dad, they're not our plans.

They're your plans.

I don't understand.

I'm talking about your future here.

You planning on wrestling for the rest of your life?

I mean, don't be ridiculous.

I'm gonna wrestle while I get a college education.

And then what?

I don't know exactly what I want to do yet,

but I do know I don't want to be in the army.

Oh.

I see.

Well, it's your life, I guess.

Look, I'm shipping out tomorrow.

I've got to pack.

But, Dad, you weren't supposed to leave until Sunday.

The state championship's tomorrow.

I know.

Good luck.

I don't believe this.

One cheerleader, and no wrestling star.

Mm-hmm. This is one pepless pep rally.

I found her wandering the halls mumbling, "please say yes.

Please say yes."

This is my last chance.

It's from Columbia.

Well? Open it.

I can't. If they said no, my life is over,

but if I don't open it, I still have some hope.

Oh, give me that.

Please say yes. Please say yes.

You got in!

Look!

They said yes?

They said yes? I got in?

? I'm going to Columbia ?

? I'm going to Columbia ?

? I'm going to Columbia ?

? I'm going to Columbia ?

Eww!

Sorry, babe. I'm in no mood for love.

Screech, what's wrong?

I just got rejected from my first choice.

Read it and weep.

"Fisher College for Women"?

Why did you want to go to an all-girls school?

Easier to get a date.

What about you, Zack?

Did you make that tough decision?

Uh, yeah, I'm going to...

[coughs] Yale.

What?

Oh, I'm going to...

[coughs] Yale.

Yale?

Did you say Yale?

Yes.

I got 1,500 on my S.A.T.S.

My mom made me apply.

Yale is a very tough school.

You've never studied a day in your life.

So? I'll pick a day and study.

I never thought I'd get in,

but since I did, I might as well go for it.

Zack, I'm proud of you.

I guess you care about your future after all.

Don't spread it around. You'll kill my image.

Hey, come on. Cheer up.

In an hour, you'll be state champion.

It doesn't matter. My dad hates me.

? Who's that guy with the charming smile? ?

? Who's that guy who wins with style? ?

? Tell us now or tell us later ?

? He'll still be champ, his name is Slater! ?

[cheering]

Come on, this pep rally's for you.

You got to say something.

Oh. Uh...

Win.

- Yay, Slater! - Yay, Slater!

A.C., my man, my star.

Today's the big day right?

Who cares?

Didn't go too well with your father, huh?

Not at all. I told him how I felt,

and he just didn't want to hear it.

Look, sometimes the truth hurts,

but in the long run, lies hurt more.

I'm proud of you.

Thank you, sir.

Good luck out there, and, hey...

kick some butt.

Hello?

Is there a state champion in here?

Leave me alone, Zack.

I'd love to,

but there's somebody who wants to see you.

Down and give me 20.

Dad? What are you doing here?

You don't think I'd leave without seeing my son do what he loves best, do you?

Actually, yeah, I did.

I was going to, but Zack can be very convincing.

I used the old Morris charm, said a few words,

and made Screech lie down in front of his Jeep.

I'll leave you two alone to talk.

Private Morris.

Thank you.

I'm glad you came, Dad.

So am I.

I just want you to be happy,

even if that means going to Iowa.

Do you really mean that?

Affirmative.

I mean... of course I do, son.

Now let's get out there and wrestle!

You got into that college for a reason, didn't you?

Maybe while you're at Iowa,

you could squeeze in R.O.T.C.

Oh, Dad...

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