Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,617 --> 00:00:04,347
- Does everybody know what time it is?
- Tool Time!
2
00:00:04,421 --> 00:00:10,021
That's right. Binford Tools is proud
to present Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor!
3
00:00:15,065 --> 00:00:19,125
Thank you.
4
00:00:19,202 --> 00:00:22,102
Welcome to Tool Time
I'm your host, Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor.
5
00:00:22,172 --> 00:00:25,162
'Course, you all know my assistant,
Al "I live for Bingo" Borland.
6
00:00:29,212 --> 00:00:32,442
Here on Tool Time we've showed you
many different ways to cut wood,
7
00:00:32,515 --> 00:00:34,065
but nothing as fun as today.
8
00:00:34,150 --> 00:00:36,910
Al, if we were gonna cut that piece
of pine, what would you select?
9
00:00:36,987 --> 00:00:40,717
Well, Tim, I'd probably use
the Binford 2,200 Circular Saw.
10
00:00:40,790 --> 00:00:43,690
Mm, good choice.
Ooh, but what if we had blown a fuse?
11
00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:46,700
I see, we're at your house.
12
00:00:46,763 --> 00:00:48,893
Well, then I'd use my trusty crosscut saw.
13
00:00:48,965 --> 00:00:52,415
That's a good choice, but not today.
Today, we have something special for you.
14
00:00:52,502 --> 00:00:54,313
And for that,
we have to bring out a very special guest.
15
00:00:54,337 --> 00:00:57,067
And I expect a big
Tool Time round of applause
16
00:00:57,140 --> 00:01:00,770
for Robert "the Human Hatchet" Cho!
17
00:01:08,051 --> 00:01:11,397
If you were to cut that piece of pine, would
you want to use a circular saw for that?
18
00:01:11,421 --> 00:01:13,791
- Won't be necessary, Tim.
- Hacksaw?
19
00:01:13,857 --> 00:01:15,687
- No, no.
- Coping saw?
20
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:23,074
Store your movies and series on HELIOS4
Open Source NAS - Visit us on KOBOL.IO
21
00:01:25,568 --> 00:01:27,847
Here's a man who doesn't worry
about losing his house keys.
22
00:01:27,871 --> 00:01:30,031
Ha! I'm in!
23
00:01:30,106 --> 00:01:33,906
Mr. Cho is here to publicize the karate
demonstration this Tuesday night
24
00:01:33,977 --> 00:01:36,337
at the Fox Theater
to benefit the Children's Hospital.
25
00:01:36,413 --> 00:01:39,043
That's right. Karate.
Boy, there's a sport with more power.
26
00:01:42,685 --> 00:01:45,445
That's right, Tim.
But the secret is to channel that power
27
00:01:45,522 --> 00:01:49,392
- through focus and concentration.
- Yeah. Two things I excel at.
28
00:01:49,459 --> 00:01:54,989
Well, that and driving yourself
to the hospital while bleeding.
29
00:01:58,201 --> 00:02:00,861
Are you saying I couldn't
break that board with my head?
30
00:02:01,337 --> 00:02:05,827
Well, Tim,
he says it takes focus and concentration.
31
00:02:05,909 --> 00:02:09,569
And I think we all know
which one of us has that.
32
00:02:13,516 --> 00:02:15,846
You think you can
break this board with your head?
33
00:02:15,919 --> 00:02:17,479
- Yes, I do.
- Oh, really?
34
00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:20,494
- I don't think it's such a good idea, Al. I...
- My show here, OK?
35
00:02:22,292 --> 00:02:25,732
- You're up to the challenge, right, Al?
- It's all right.
36
00:02:44,581 --> 00:02:47,021
Tim, Tim.
37
00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:48,961
- I don't think that you should try this.
- Hey, quiet.
38
00:02:48,985 --> 00:02:51,130
- I think there's one thing that you should...
- You've said enough.
39
00:02:51,154 --> 00:02:54,124
- Well, you should know...
- It's my show. I can do this.
40
00:03:07,203 --> 00:03:10,903
I was gonna say
I have studied karate. Tim.
41
00:03:10,974 --> 00:03:13,774
Buford Tools... Messages...
We have them.
42
00:03:13,843 --> 00:03:15,833
We'll be right back.
43
00:04:27,183 --> 00:04:29,583
Well, what do you think?
Could we put the kids in the middle?
44
00:04:32,889 --> 00:04:35,519
- Spaghetti sauce smells terrific.
- Thank you.
45
00:04:35,592 --> 00:04:38,962
Honey, um, this breadstick
is too long for the bread basket.
46
00:04:39,028 --> 00:04:41,928
Could you break that with your head?
47
00:04:45,902 --> 00:04:49,772
- I think I can handle that. I can handle it.
- Focus.
48
00:04:52,141 --> 00:04:54,611
- Hyah!
- Ah.
49
00:04:58,448 --> 00:05:00,938
- Hey, Dad. Think fast.
- Not in the house!
50
00:05:03,486 --> 00:05:05,746
- You guys are jerks!
- Oh, go play in quicksand.
51
00:05:05,822 --> 00:05:08,382
- Oh, shut up.
- Stop it. Come over here.
52
00:05:08,458 --> 00:05:11,688
- What's going on?
- They won't let me play football with them.
53
00:05:11,761 --> 00:05:13,161
- Still?
- Guys.
54
00:05:13,229 --> 00:05:16,129
How many times do we have to tell you?
Let your brother play.
55
00:05:16,199 --> 00:05:18,877
We were just about to put him in the game
when everyone had to go home.
56
00:05:18,901 --> 00:05:20,446
- Yeah, that's right.
- You guys are lying.
57
00:05:20,470 --> 00:05:24,270
Hey, hey, let me handle this.
You guys are lying.
58
00:05:26,109 --> 00:05:27,169
Yeah.
59
00:05:27,243 --> 00:05:29,913
Mark, get out of here for a minute.
We'll talk to them.
60
00:05:29,979 --> 00:05:32,469
Stop doing that stuff.
What's the matter with you guys?
61
00:05:32,548 --> 00:05:35,778
- Dad, he's a huge geek.
- That is enough.
62
00:05:35,852 --> 00:05:38,582
Now listen, the next time
he wants to play, include him.
63
00:05:38,655 --> 00:05:42,515
Yeah. Well, Dad, he's always running
out of bounds. He's chicken.
64
00:05:42,592 --> 00:05:45,437
He's not chicken. He just doesn't have
a lot of self-confidence right now.
65
00:05:45,461 --> 00:05:47,191
He's afraid of getting hit.
66
00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:48,863
Well, you know,
just tell the other guys
67
00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:51,761
that he has some kind of horrible rash
and they shouldn't touch him.
68
00:05:51,834 --> 00:05:53,634
- Yeah, right.
- Yeah, right.
69
00:05:53,703 --> 00:05:56,482
Why don't you teach him something about
football? Wouldn't that be a good idea?
70
00:05:56,506 --> 00:05:58,684
Like right now. I'll teach you guys
how to go a long pass. Go long, come on.
71
00:05:58,708 --> 00:06:01,178
Come on, in there. Swerve.
Now, long! Go!
72
00:06:01,244 --> 00:06:03,844
Come on! Longer! Go long!
73
00:06:03,913 --> 00:06:05,943
Post pattern. Go! Go!
74
00:06:06,015 --> 00:06:08,245
Dad, come on!
I'm in the bathroom!
75
00:06:08,318 --> 00:06:11,288
Well, shut the door and take a shower.
76
00:06:13,456 --> 00:06:17,476
I think you're right about Mark. I think
that he just has a self-confidence problem.
77
00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:19,405
We should find him something
that he can be good at.
78
00:06:19,429 --> 00:06:22,259
I got it. I got it. How about...
79
00:06:24,834 --> 00:06:28,574
- Flight attendant?
- Karate.
80
00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:30,968
No, no. Karate is too violent.
81
00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:33,010
What about gymnastics?
82
00:06:33,076 --> 00:06:34,916
That's a wonderful sport
and he won't get hurt.
83
00:06:34,944 --> 00:06:39,384
He won't get hurt?
One slip on the pommel horse, boom.
84
00:06:39,449 --> 00:06:42,209
- Why don't we just let Mark decide?
- There's an idea.
85
00:06:42,285 --> 00:06:44,715
- Hey, Mark! Come down here!
- Coming.
86
00:06:44,787 --> 00:06:47,147
I'll just ask him which he prefers,
gymnastics or karate.
87
00:06:47,223 --> 00:06:49,123
- I'll ask him.
- No, no, no. I know you.
88
00:06:49,192 --> 00:06:52,032
You'll just try to influence him.
I am gonna be fair and objective.
89
00:06:52,095 --> 00:06:53,585
- No tricks.
- I won't say a word.
90
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:55,823
OK, Mark. Sit down.
91
00:06:55,898 --> 00:06:59,558
Your father and I
were just talking and, uh...
92
00:07:02,338 --> 00:07:05,050
We think that since Brad and Randy
won't ever let you play with them,
93
00:07:05,074 --> 00:07:07,886
that you should take some kind of class
where everyone gets to participate.
94
00:07:07,910 --> 00:07:09,540
So, what do you think?
95
00:07:09,612 --> 00:07:13,052
Do you want to take gymnastics,
96
00:07:13,116 --> 00:07:15,176
or... karate?
97
00:07:15,651 --> 00:07:18,051
I can take karate?
98
00:07:18,121 --> 00:07:19,151
All right.
99
00:07:19,822 --> 00:07:22,762
Before you decide...
Before you decide...
100
00:07:22,825 --> 00:07:25,255
do you remember
when we watched the Olympics
101
00:07:25,328 --> 00:07:31,288
and we saw those handsome
American gymnasts get their gold medals?
102
00:07:31,834 --> 00:07:33,934
- Jill...
- Shut up!
103
00:07:34,003 --> 00:07:37,843
They were standing, remember,
on that podium, so proud.
104
00:07:37,907 --> 00:07:39,927
And the American flag was raised,
105
00:07:40,009 --> 00:07:43,139
and "The Star-Spangled Banner"
was playing,
106
00:07:43,212 --> 00:07:45,442
and America wept.
107
00:07:45,515 --> 00:07:47,235
- Please!
- Remember that?
108
00:07:47,884 --> 00:07:49,584
That could be you.
That could be you.
109
00:07:49,652 --> 00:07:53,552
Mark Taylor, gymnast, representing
the entire United States of America.
110
00:07:53,623 --> 00:07:56,723
When does he get
his Congressional Medal of Honor?
111
00:07:56,793 --> 00:08:00,823
Or you could take karate and, you know,
probably lose some teeth.
112
00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:03,157
Or slip on a pommel horse
and squish your little...
113
00:08:03,232 --> 00:08:07,072
Tim... don't try to influence him.
114
00:08:07,136 --> 00:08:08,926
I've just got one thing to say to you.
115
00:08:09,005 --> 00:08:13,095
Tanaka Mothra!
116
00:08:14,177 --> 00:08:15,637
- Karate!
- All right!
117
00:08:15,711 --> 00:08:16,941
Yes!
118
00:08:17,013 --> 00:08:19,073
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
119
00:08:21,184 --> 00:08:23,454
- OK, everyone stand up.
- Yes, sensei.
120
00:08:23,519 --> 00:08:24,879
Push back.
121
00:08:24,954 --> 00:08:30,954
I'm gonna show you a little piece of the
demonstration I'm gonna do this weekend.
122
00:08:46,843 --> 00:08:48,473
- Tim?
- Yeah?
123
00:08:48,544 --> 00:08:52,044
- Having a muscle spasm?
- No, I was working some karate moves.
124
00:08:52,114 --> 00:08:54,414
Oh, is that what that was?
125
00:08:54,484 --> 00:08:56,784
You OK?
126
00:08:56,853 --> 00:08:59,013
OK, class. Line up. Yes, sensei?
127
00:08:59,088 --> 00:09:00,848
Yes, sensei.
128
00:09:00,923 --> 00:09:02,823
Horse stance, one. Hands out.
129
00:09:02,892 --> 00:09:04,662
Hi.
130
00:09:05,661 --> 00:09:06,721
Hi, Mark.
131
00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:09,626
Kids don't wave at their moms
during karate class.
132
00:09:09,699 --> 00:09:11,559
Fighting stance. Ready? Loud.
133
00:09:11,634 --> 00:09:14,304
Ich, ni, san, hyah!
134
00:09:14,937 --> 00:09:17,997
Look at that.
He's got his fists clenched so tight
135
00:09:18,074 --> 00:09:21,604
his little knuckles are turning white.
Couldn't he... loosen that up some?
136
00:09:21,677 --> 00:09:24,537
Oh, yeah.
Loose fist makes a very effective weapon.
137
00:09:24,614 --> 00:09:26,492
That's how come boxers
always come together with the referee.
138
00:09:26,516 --> 00:09:28,446
"All right, guys.
Come out slapping."
139
00:09:28,518 --> 00:09:31,078
"Take that, you big mean man.
Take that, take that."
140
00:09:31,153 --> 00:09:32,153
Stop it.
141
00:09:33,489 --> 00:09:36,649
He does look real cute doing this.
142
00:09:36,726 --> 00:09:38,956
Well, I don't know.
143
00:09:39,028 --> 00:09:43,398
Maybe karate's not so bad after all.
It seems pretty harmless.
144
00:09:43,466 --> 00:09:45,544
I really should get home and start dinner.
I'll see you later.
145
00:09:45,568 --> 00:09:46,688
- See you later.
- Bye.
146
00:09:46,769 --> 00:09:51,169
Now we're gonna do some free fighting.
Push back.
147
00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:53,710
- Free fighting? What is that?
- It's just a term.
148
00:09:53,776 --> 00:09:56,766
So is "cracked fibula."
149
00:09:56,846 --> 00:09:59,925
I've asked two boys from my advanced
class to come do a demonstration for you.
150
00:09:59,949 --> 00:10:02,509
Face each other. Bow.
Fighting stance.
151
00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:07,818
Two, three. Ah-ya!
152
00:10:10,293 --> 00:10:12,993
- Ah-ya!
- This is what you have to look forward to.
153
00:10:13,062 --> 00:10:16,432
I don't think so.
It's pommel horse time.
154
00:10:16,499 --> 00:10:19,589
Come on. Sit down. These are
the experienced. The advanced class.
155
00:10:19,669 --> 00:10:21,647
Mark won't be able
to kill anybody till he's or 10 or 11.
156
00:10:21,671 --> 00:10:23,661
Oh, that's comforting.
157
00:10:23,739 --> 00:10:25,829
Everyone, stand up.
Get a partner, quick.
158
00:10:27,143 --> 00:10:29,483
Grab a partner.
Let's go. Let's go.
159
00:10:29,545 --> 00:10:31,705
You two, up front.
160
00:10:31,781 --> 00:10:33,411
Hey, this isn't fair.
161
00:10:33,482 --> 00:10:35,422
- That kid's way bigger than Mark.
- Shh.
162
00:10:35,484 --> 00:10:38,424
All right, Artie.
Get ready to kick some butt, huh?
163
00:10:43,159 --> 00:10:46,249
Boy, there's a mom you could love, huh?
164
00:10:46,329 --> 00:10:48,349
Yeah, that butt she wants kicked is Mark's.
165
00:10:48,431 --> 00:10:50,801
It's just an exercise. Mark, go on.
Come on, buddy.
166
00:10:50,866 --> 00:10:54,226
One, two! That's it, see?
Keep your hands up.
167
00:10:54,303 --> 00:10:57,743
Did you see that? That kid slapped him
when the teacher wasn't looking.
168
00:10:57,807 --> 00:10:59,967
Mark, let it go, buddy. Let it go.
Focus, come on.
169
00:11:00,042 --> 00:11:03,602
- High block, knife hand. One, two!
- Artie, grind him up, huh?
170
00:11:05,481 --> 00:11:07,851
Excuse me. Ma'am, um...
171
00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:11,817
I don't think you should be encouraging
your child in this sort of behavior.
172
00:11:11,887 --> 00:11:14,377
- What are you talking about?
- Well, he just slapped my boy.
173
00:11:14,457 --> 00:11:17,587
It's karate class.
That's what it's all about.
174
00:11:17,660 --> 00:11:20,630
No. Slapping is not what it is all about.
175
00:11:20,696 --> 00:11:23,886
Hey, if stick boy can't take it,
get him out of here.
176
00:11:24,934 --> 00:11:27,844
He did it again! Hey, come on.
Tell your kid to stop playing dirty.
177
00:11:27,903 --> 00:11:29,873
Listen, they are just having fun.
178
00:11:29,939 --> 00:11:31,799
Artie is not gonna hurt stick boy.
179
00:11:31,874 --> 00:11:34,974
Would you stop calling my kid "stick boy"?
180
00:11:35,044 --> 00:11:36,844
Then feed him something.
181
00:11:37,546 --> 00:11:40,406
Face it, lady. Your kid's a weenie.
Artie just gave him a little tap.
182
00:11:40,483 --> 00:11:42,794
Well, how would you like it
if somebody gave you a little tap, huh?
183
00:11:42,818 --> 00:11:44,808
Is that fun?
184
00:11:48,257 --> 00:11:50,447
- Don't touch me, lady.
- Hey, don't shove me.
185
00:11:50,526 --> 00:11:51,716
Get out of my face.
186
00:11:51,794 --> 00:11:53,271
Why don't you tell that
to your breakfast doughnut?
187
00:11:53,295 --> 00:11:55,255
Hey, hey, honey. Stop it!
188
00:11:55,331 --> 00:11:57,631
Hyah!
189
00:11:57,700 --> 00:12:00,360
- You OK, Dad?
- Yeah.
190
00:12:09,545 --> 00:12:11,665
Let me go tell
Brad and Randy what happened.
191
00:12:11,747 --> 00:12:13,737
No, don't.
192
00:12:13,816 --> 00:12:16,306
- Brad, Randy!
- I can't believe it.
193
00:12:16,385 --> 00:12:19,745
I am so ashamed
that I got into a fight with that woman.
194
00:12:19,822 --> 00:12:21,792
You were just trying to protect our son.
195
00:12:21,857 --> 00:12:23,827
Well, it was the karate class.
196
00:12:23,893 --> 00:12:26,204
How can you not be violent when
everybody around you is going...
197
00:12:26,228 --> 00:12:28,558
hey-ha, ho, ya-ya!
198
00:12:29,632 --> 00:12:33,472
Hey, Dad. I heard a woman
slugged you with her purse?
199
00:12:33,536 --> 00:12:37,296
What happened,
she wouldn't let you borrow her makeup?
200
00:12:38,941 --> 00:12:40,931
Son, you want to say that
one more time to me?
201
00:12:41,877 --> 00:12:44,067
No.
202
00:12:44,146 --> 00:12:46,336
Quit teasing your dad.
It's my fault.
203
00:12:46,415 --> 00:12:48,375
I got into a fight with this woman.
204
00:12:48,451 --> 00:12:52,821
- Oh, Mom, that's great!
- No, it is not great.
205
00:12:52,888 --> 00:12:54,948
- So, Dad, how'd she do?
- She was awesome.
206
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:58,084
She stepped right in there,
face to face, toe to toe. It was great.
207
00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:01,250
It was stupid,
and it never would have happened
208
00:13:01,330 --> 00:13:04,320
if that woman had just
stopped her son from hitting Mark.
209
00:13:04,400 --> 00:13:07,370
Ooh, little Mark needs Mommy
to fight his battles.
210
00:13:07,436 --> 00:13:08,986
Shut up!
211
00:13:09,071 --> 00:13:11,131
- Cut it out. Stop it.
- Guys, stop it!
212
00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:15,107
- Stop that! Come here!
- Hey, when I tell you to stop, stop!
213
00:13:15,177 --> 00:13:17,089
You better watch out.
Another week of karate class,
214
00:13:17,113 --> 00:13:18,833
he'll be wiping the floor
with you two guys.
215
00:13:18,881 --> 00:13:20,371
- Yeah, right. Look at him.
- No!
216
00:13:20,449 --> 00:13:22,639
Why are you all
so fascinated with fighting?
217
00:13:22,718 --> 00:13:25,878
I don't want anybody to beat anybody up.
218
00:13:25,955 --> 00:13:29,045
What is wrong with you people?
You make me sick.
219
00:13:29,125 --> 00:13:33,215
I just want you to love each other,
you big bunch of jerks!
220
00:13:40,035 --> 00:13:42,695
Are you satisfied?
I mean, she's talking to you two.
221
00:13:46,976 --> 00:13:49,955
You bummed her out. All she wants is
us to show a little respect to one another.
222
00:13:49,979 --> 00:13:53,509
- Is that too much to ask?
- Dad, we're sorry.
223
00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:56,182
Yeah, we'll try.
224
00:13:57,586 --> 00:14:01,316
Dad got hit by a girl!
Dad got hit by a girl!
225
00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:05,192
I know where you both live!
226
00:14:07,496 --> 00:14:11,126
And that's the proper way
to repair a mortise and tenon joint.
227
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:12,480
- Good job, Al.
- Thank you, Tim.
228
00:14:12,535 --> 00:14:14,125
Now, if we were building a coffin,
229
00:14:14,203 --> 00:14:18,443
would we have to build
a rigor mortis and tenon joint?
230
00:14:20,876 --> 00:14:23,276
I don't think so, Tim.
231
00:14:23,345 --> 00:14:28,305
Almost out of time, Al.
Just enough time for "Camouflage Corner."
232
00:14:28,384 --> 00:14:29,654
"Camouflage Corner"?
233
00:14:29,718 --> 00:14:32,688
- Yeah. Didn't you get that memo?
- No.
234
00:14:32,755 --> 00:14:35,215
Must have been camouflaged.
235
00:14:37,593 --> 00:14:40,223
Normally when we think of camouflage,
we think of military.
236
00:14:40,296 --> 00:14:44,226
Now this is your typical
military soldier's tiger camouflage.
237
00:14:45,968 --> 00:14:49,458
Now here's that same soldier
in a Costa Rican jungle.
238
00:14:51,807 --> 00:14:53,318
Where is he? Where is he?
I can't even see him!
239
00:14:53,342 --> 00:14:55,402
He could be looking at me right now!
I'm so scared!
240
00:14:58,347 --> 00:15:01,937
Al, there's also applications in your yard.
That tool shed of yours?
241
00:15:02,017 --> 00:15:05,507
A little unsightly out there
in the backyard. All right.
242
00:15:05,588 --> 00:15:10,858
Now, here's a way to camouflage.
You can hardly even tell it's there now.
243
00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:17,532
- Think you've finally lost it, Tim.
- I'm just joking around, Al.
244
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:20,330
Actually, camouflage has many
applications, even around the house.
245
00:15:20,402 --> 00:15:23,272
Lisa, bring that out, please.
Let's take wallpaper.
246
00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:27,569
Wallpaper can be used to decorate a wall
or disguise an unsightly wall switch.
247
00:15:27,643 --> 00:15:29,773
Now see, can you find the switch here, Al?
248
00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:40,115
Well, they're usually...
They're usually right along the...
249
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:42,519
Not as easy as it looks, is it, Al?
250
00:15:42,591 --> 00:15:44,991
That's camouflage for you. Woop!
251
00:15:50,566 --> 00:15:53,206
This is ridiculous, Tim.
I don't want to be a part of this anymore.
252
00:15:53,235 --> 00:15:56,525
I'm sorry, Al.
Just trying to make a point.
253
00:15:56,605 --> 00:15:58,965
Here, put these away for me, will you?
Come on. Put 'em...
254
00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:02,011
Just grab them, Al.
Grab the darn things, Al.
255
00:16:02,077 --> 00:16:06,337
Al? Hey, Al, where'd you go?
256
00:16:09,251 --> 00:16:11,651
Al!
257
00:16:13,455 --> 00:16:14,715
Al!
258
00:16:15,524 --> 00:16:17,994
All right, one more time. Ready?
Fighting position.
259
00:16:18,060 --> 00:16:21,000
Ich, ni, san, hyah!
260
00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:23,293
Again, again, again.
Fighting position.
261
00:16:23,365 --> 00:16:26,295
Ich, ni, san, hyah!
262
00:16:26,368 --> 00:16:27,679
- That's good.
- Let's do it again.
263
00:16:27,703 --> 00:16:29,803
No, I don't want to wear you out
before class.
264
00:16:29,872 --> 00:16:32,362
- I'm not tired.
- Oh, you're tired. I know when you're tired!
265
00:16:32,441 --> 00:16:34,411
I can tell just by looking at you.
266
00:16:34,476 --> 00:16:36,236
- Hi-ho, neighbor.
- Hi, Wilson. How are you?
267
00:16:36,278 --> 00:16:38,178
- You all right there?
- I'm great.
268
00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:40,717
I got him in a karate class.
We're out here to practice moves.
269
00:16:40,783 --> 00:16:43,383
Oh, yes, karate does build up the stamina.
270
00:16:43,452 --> 00:16:45,322
Yeah.
271
00:16:45,387 --> 00:16:47,966
Jill thinks I have him taking the karate
class so it'll teach him how to fight.
272
00:16:47,990 --> 00:16:50,930
Oh, so Jill thinks
you have a predilection for aggression.
273
00:16:50,993 --> 00:16:52,863
- Predilection?
- Let's just say proclivity.
274
00:16:52,928 --> 00:16:57,368
- Proclivity? What else you got?
- How about inclination?
275
00:16:57,433 --> 00:16:59,633
Inclination, yeah.
Well, that's what she thinks, anyway.
276
00:16:59,668 --> 00:17:02,328
But you're not actually
encouraging Mark to fight.
277
00:17:02,404 --> 00:17:04,382
No. I just want him
to be able to stand up for himself.
278
00:17:04,406 --> 00:17:07,652
If he gets in a bad situation, I'd like him
to be able to kick butt in a major way.
279
00:17:07,676 --> 00:17:10,906
- But every dad wants that, you know.
- Gandhi's dad didn't.
280
00:17:11,981 --> 00:17:15,281
Well, maybe Gandhi
was a major disappointment to his dad.
281
00:17:15,351 --> 00:17:17,595
Maybe Gandhi didn't eat because
he wouldn't fight kids for his lunch money.
282
00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:18,749
How about that?
283
00:17:18,821 --> 00:17:22,221
Tim, are we talking about
the same Gandhi?
284
00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:24,561
Not unless he went
to my elementary school.
285
00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:27,901
You see, when I was that age,
286
00:17:27,963 --> 00:17:31,663
if I couldn't wisecrack my way
out of a situation, sometimes I'd run.
287
00:17:31,734 --> 00:17:34,604
And I'm thinking that karate
288
00:17:34,670 --> 00:17:37,970
would give Mark, you know,
the ability to stand up for himself.
289
00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:41,570
Well, Tim, I'm reminded of
what the Greek historian Herodotus said:
290
00:17:41,643 --> 00:17:45,203
"Where wisdom is called for,
force is of little use."
291
00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:47,610
Of course wisdom is the best way to go.
292
00:17:47,683 --> 00:17:49,713
But when a fat kid is slapping you around,
293
00:17:49,785 --> 00:17:54,775
you don't have time to be thinking about
reciting the state capitals alphabetically.
294
00:17:55,791 --> 00:17:59,561
Well, that's interesting.
Albany, Annapolis, Atlanta...
295
00:17:59,628 --> 00:18:02,858
- Wilson. Wilson!
- Augusta, Austin, Baton Rouge...
296
00:18:02,931 --> 00:18:05,421
- You got a minute?
- Oh, I'm sorry, neighbor.
297
00:18:05,501 --> 00:18:07,661
Do you think it's a bad idea
to teach the kid karate?
298
00:18:08,437 --> 00:18:11,837
You just have to remember that when you
give a boy a weapon like karate,
299
00:18:11,907 --> 00:18:14,597
that he's mature enough
to know when to use it.
300
00:18:14,676 --> 00:18:17,436
- Yeah, he is a little kid, isn't he?
- Mm-hm.
301
00:18:18,414 --> 00:18:19,754
- Have a good day.
- Mm-hm.
302
00:18:19,815 --> 00:18:24,275
Bismarck, Boise, Boston, Carson City...
303
00:18:24,353 --> 00:18:27,413
Charleston! Cheyenne, Columbia...
304
00:18:30,426 --> 00:18:33,086
- Dad, is Mom coming?
- No.
305
00:18:33,162 --> 00:18:36,722
What are we gonna do
in case there's trouble?
306
00:18:39,802 --> 00:18:42,502
- There's not gonna be any trouble.
- Bow.
307
00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:46,772
If Artie pushes me,
I'm gonna give him a karate chop.
308
00:18:46,842 --> 00:18:50,472
You're not ready to karate chop anybody
yet. You don't know enough about karate.
309
00:18:50,546 --> 00:18:53,276
But you're learning.
You're gonna know pretty soon.
310
00:18:53,348 --> 00:18:56,478
- Then I'll beat him up, I guess.
- No, no, no, no, no.
311
00:18:56,552 --> 00:18:59,782
With guys like Artie, once they know
that you have the skill
312
00:18:59,855 --> 00:19:02,255
to actually beat them
up, you don't have to.
313
00:19:02,324 --> 00:19:04,244
Then you have the confidence
to just stand there,
314
00:19:04,293 --> 00:19:07,133
and they walk away, you know?
315
00:19:07,196 --> 00:19:09,156
Karate does give you more power,
316
00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:12,461
but it's wisdom that teaches you
when to use the power.
317
00:19:12,534 --> 00:19:16,374
That's according to Greek historian,
Hippopotamus.
318
00:19:16,438 --> 00:19:21,238
What are we gonna do
in case he pushes me today?
319
00:19:21,310 --> 00:19:23,140
Just wave those socks in front of him.
320
00:19:23,212 --> 00:19:24,582
- Boy.
- Dad, come on.
321
00:19:24,646 --> 00:19:27,206
- You got a fish in there?
- Dad.
322
00:19:27,282 --> 00:19:30,812
- Recite the state capitals.
- I don't know them.
323
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:33,220
- Then walk away from it, OK?
- OK.
324
00:19:33,288 --> 00:19:37,418
Have fun. That's the key here. Fun.
Concentrate. Have a good time.
325
00:19:37,493 --> 00:19:38,823
- Hi.
- How you doing?
326
00:19:38,894 --> 00:19:40,672
- Boy, these kids love this, don't they?
- Yeah.
327
00:19:40,696 --> 00:19:42,956
I could have used
a class like this when I was a kid.
328
00:19:43,031 --> 00:19:45,661
- You and me both. Who are you with?
- Artie.
329
00:19:47,703 --> 00:19:49,693
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
330
00:19:55,811 --> 00:19:58,781
I don't want butterball
to mess with my kid today, OK?
331
00:19:58,847 --> 00:20:01,147
Well, you don't have to be
so mean about it.
332
00:20:01,216 --> 00:20:04,646
Look, I'm just saying
I don't want Artie touching my kid.
333
00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:08,750
And if anybody calls my kid "stick boy,"
there's gonna be some big trouble.
334
00:20:08,824 --> 00:20:10,624
Look, if you've got
a problem with my nephew,
335
00:20:10,692 --> 00:20:12,737
- maybe you'd better talk to his father.
- His father?
336
00:20:12,761 --> 00:20:14,751
Hey, Roy!
337
00:20:17,799 --> 00:20:19,199
- That's his father?
- Yeah.
338
00:20:19,268 --> 00:20:21,168
Why aren't you his father?
339
00:20:22,704 --> 00:20:25,974
- Hey, Mike. What's up?
- This guy here... What's your name?
340
00:20:26,041 --> 00:20:29,371
Borland. Al Borland.
341
00:20:29,444 --> 00:20:33,404
Al said if Artie touches stick boy,
there's going to be big trouble.
342
00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:36,512
Did I say it like that? With hostility
like that? It didn't come out...
343
00:20:36,585 --> 00:20:40,415
Wait a minute.
My wife told me about you.
344
00:20:40,489 --> 00:20:42,319
You're married to that loudmouth.
345
00:20:43,192 --> 00:20:45,522
Yeah, that's her.
346
00:20:46,795 --> 00:20:50,815
- I don't like anyone threatening my son.
- Don't crowd me.
347
00:20:50,899 --> 00:20:53,059
What are you gonna do about it?
348
00:20:53,802 --> 00:20:57,002
Atlanta, Austin,
349
00:20:57,072 --> 00:20:59,342
Afghanistan...
350
00:20:59,408 --> 00:21:01,085
- So you're a wise guy, huh?
- Hey, hey, hey.
351
00:21:01,109 --> 00:21:03,421
- Hey, leave my father alone.
- Mark, I can handle this. Mark!
352
00:21:03,445 --> 00:21:06,465
- Ich, ni, san, hyah!
- Mark, come on. Mark.
353
00:21:06,548 --> 00:21:09,278
- Back off, stick boy.
- Hey, don't push my kid like that.
354
00:21:09,351 --> 00:21:11,341
- Like you're gonna stop me.
- Yeah.
355
00:21:15,290 --> 00:21:17,090
Hold on a minute!
Hold on a minute!
356
00:21:17,159 --> 00:21:21,189
See, Mark?
I should have walked away.
357
00:21:21,897 --> 00:21:23,387
That was your best shot?
358
00:21:23,465 --> 00:21:25,395
Better Better
359
00:21:28,937 --> 00:21:32,337
No. No, I understand, Mr. Cho.
It's fine.
360
00:21:32,407 --> 00:21:34,467
OK. Bye-bye.
361
00:21:34,543 --> 00:21:36,583
- I'm taking Mark to karate class.
- No, you're not.
362
00:21:36,612 --> 00:21:40,412
That was Mr. Cho.
He's moving Mark into a different class.
363
00:21:40,482 --> 00:21:42,452
All right, advanced class, huh?
364
00:21:42,517 --> 00:21:46,777
That was all those little extra lessons
I've been doing with him. Ha!
365
00:21:46,855 --> 00:21:51,985
No, Tim.
Mr. Cho is not moving him up.
366
00:21:52,060 --> 00:21:54,839
There's another beginners' class that starts
in two weeks. He's gonna put him in that.
367
00:21:54,863 --> 00:21:56,993
- Why?
- He says that we don't understand
368
00:21:57,065 --> 00:22:00,325
- the basic philosophy behind karate.
- What?
369
00:22:00,402 --> 00:22:03,702
Yeah. He thinks that we have
a lot of... pent-up hostility.
370
00:22:03,772 --> 00:22:06,832
That's crazy.
I'm gonna get that idiot on the phone.
371
00:22:06,908 --> 00:22:11,538
He has a point, you know. Every time we
took Mark to class, one of us hit somebody.
372
00:22:11,613 --> 00:22:14,053
Well, you started it, though.
373
00:22:14,116 --> 00:22:18,706
I got a way that we can...
let off some steam.
374
00:22:18,787 --> 00:22:20,977
Ohh, ohh.
375
00:22:21,056 --> 00:22:23,296
It'll put us in great shape
for Mark's next karate class.
376
00:22:23,358 --> 00:22:24,918
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
377
00:22:24,993 --> 00:22:26,823
Ho, ho, ho.
378
00:22:30,265 --> 00:22:31,955
- Focus.
- Yeah.
379
00:22:32,034 --> 00:22:34,234
- Yah, Mothra!
- Ahchoo!
380
00:22:40,876 --> 00:22:44,396
Frankfort, Harrisburg,
Hartford, Helena, Honolulu,
381
00:22:44,479 --> 00:22:47,539
Indianapolis, Jackson, Jefferson City,
382
00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:50,136
Juneau, Lansing, Lincoln, Little Rock,
383
00:22:50,218 --> 00:22:52,688
Madison, Montgomery, Montpelier,
384
00:22:52,754 --> 00:22:56,594
Nashville, Oklahoma City,
Olympia, Phoenix,
385
00:22:56,658 --> 00:22:59,178
Pierre, Providence, Raleigh, Richmond,
386
00:22:59,261 --> 00:23:02,721
Sacramento, Salem, Salt Lake City,
387
00:23:02,798 --> 00:23:06,288
Santa Fe, Springfield, St. Paul,
388
00:23:06,368 --> 00:23:10,458
Tallahassee, Topeka, and Trenton.
389
00:23:11,473 --> 00:23:13,773
Albany, Atlanta...
389
00:23:14,305 --> 00:23:20,483
Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from SubtitleDB.org
32976
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.