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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,233 English (HI) Subtitles. [MP4] Two and a Half Men S12E15E16 (720p) Of Course He's Dead - HDTV [KoTuWa] 2 00:00:01,240 --> 00:00:02,043 ♪ Men. ♪ 3 00:00:02,047 --> 00:00:04,011 Charlie lived life to its fullest 4 00:00:04,012 --> 00:00:05,845 and-and gave it everything he had. 5 00:00:05,847 --> 00:00:08,147 Gave me herpes. 6 00:00:08,149 --> 00:00:09,415 Vaginal warts. 7 00:00:09,417 --> 00:00:11,817 He used my panties to make tea. 8 00:00:13,253 --> 00:00:17,623 My point is, um, that Charlie lived life on his own terms. 9 00:00:17,625 --> 00:00:20,326 Blah, blah, blah. Why can't we see the body? 10 00:00:20,328 --> 00:00:23,696 Charlie Harper was the love of my life 11 00:00:23,698 --> 00:00:26,265 and a wonderful, wonderful man. 12 00:00:26,267 --> 00:00:27,633 He slipped on the Metro platform 13 00:00:27,635 --> 00:00:29,502 and fell in front of an oncoming train. 14 00:00:29,504 --> 00:00:33,606 His body just exploded like a balloon full of meat. 15 00:00:34,875 --> 00:00:37,777 I know what you said you wanted, but... 16 00:00:37,779 --> 00:00:40,079 I really don't think Pamela Anderson will agree 17 00:00:40,081 --> 00:00:42,348 to swallow your ashes. 18 00:00:44,051 --> 00:00:46,352 (screams) 19 00:00:55,963 --> 00:00:57,863 I ain't cleaning him up. 20 00:00:59,466 --> 00:01:01,067 ♪ Men. ♪ 21 00:01:01,069 --> 00:01:03,903 ♪ Imagine me and you, I do 22 00:01:03,905 --> 00:01:06,272 ♪ I think about you day and night ♪ 23 00:01:06,274 --> 00:01:08,007 ♪ It's only right 24 00:01:08,009 --> 00:01:10,209 ♪ To think about the boy you love ♪ 25 00:01:10,211 --> 00:01:11,811 ♪ And hold him tight 26 00:01:11,813 --> 00:01:15,014 ♪ So happy together 27 00:01:15,016 --> 00:01:18,351 ♪ So how is the weather? 28 00:01:18,353 --> 00:01:20,152 ♪ Ba, Ba, Ba, Ba 29 00:01:20,154 --> 00:01:22,822 ♪ Ba, Ba-Ba-Ba, Ba-Ba, Ba 30 00:01:22,824 --> 00:01:24,256 ♪ Ba-Ba, Ba, Ba. 31 00:01:24,258 --> 00:01:25,958 Lunchtime. 32 00:01:27,494 --> 00:01:29,195 Here you go. 33 00:01:29,197 --> 00:01:31,330 Tuna on toast... 34 00:01:31,332 --> 00:01:32,832 with vodka. 35 00:01:34,935 --> 00:01:37,570 Oh, don't give me that look. 36 00:01:37,572 --> 00:01:39,672 It needs to eat. 37 00:01:40,707 --> 00:01:42,508 Oh, is it sulking? 38 00:01:42,510 --> 00:01:45,011 Well, if it doesn't eat, 39 00:01:45,013 --> 00:01:47,246 it gets the hose. 40 00:01:48,682 --> 00:01:50,016 That's better. 41 00:01:50,018 --> 00:01:52,718 And pick up the napkin. 42 00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:54,153 Just because it lives in a pit, 43 00:01:54,155 --> 00:01:56,689 it doesn't have to live like an animal. 44 00:01:56,691 --> 00:01:59,492 Thank you. 45 00:01:59,494 --> 00:02:02,261 And after it eats, 46 00:02:02,263 --> 00:02:05,031 it changes its clothes. 47 00:02:08,301 --> 00:02:11,270 ♪ Men, men, men, men, manly men, men, men ♪ 48 00:02:11,272 --> 00:02:12,272 ♪ Ah. ♪ Men. 49 00:02:12,273 --> 00:02:16,273 ♪ Two and a Half Men 12x15 ♪ Of Course He's Dead Part 1 Original Air Date: 2015-02-19 50 00:02:20,274 --> 00:02:21,841 ♪ Men. ♪ Got any good mail? 51 00:02:21,843 --> 00:02:23,409 Uh, let's see. Uh, electric bill, 52 00:02:23,411 --> 00:02:26,412 cable bill, water bill. Here you go. 53 00:02:27,447 --> 00:02:29,715 Do you ever experience shame? 54 00:02:29,717 --> 00:02:31,651 Uh, shame is a rich man's emotion. 55 00:02:31,653 --> 00:02:34,553 I can barely afford embarrassment. 56 00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:37,223 Oh, wow. 57 00:02:37,225 --> 00:02:38,791 Something for Charlie. 58 00:02:38,793 --> 00:02:41,227 I-I told you to cancel his subscription 59 00:02:41,229 --> 00:02:44,163 to the Sex Toy of the Month Club. 60 00:02:44,165 --> 00:02:46,766 Oh, can't. He paid for life. 61 00:02:46,768 --> 00:02:49,435 And, uh, January was butt plug month. 62 00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:55,341 Oh. Oh, it's, uh... it's from his music publisher. 63 00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:00,780 (whimpers) 64 00:03:00,782 --> 00:03:02,281 You okay? 65 00:03:02,283 --> 00:03:04,016 I'm-I'm... I'm not sure. 66 00:03:04,018 --> 00:03:05,384 Look. 67 00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:08,888 "Dear Mr. Harper: 68 00:03:08,890 --> 00:03:11,457 "We are holding unclaimed music royalties for you 69 00:03:11,459 --> 00:03:14,527 in the amount of $2.5 million." 70 00:03:14,529 --> 00:03:17,496 (whimpers) 71 00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:19,198 Looks like those children's records he made 72 00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:20,433 are still making money. 73 00:03:20,435 --> 00:03:22,001 Uh, say the number again. 74 00:03:22,003 --> 00:03:23,169 $2.5 million. 75 00:03:23,171 --> 00:03:25,638 (whimpers) 76 00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:28,674 Apparently, it's been stacking up since he died. 77 00:03:28,676 --> 00:03:29,942 Like the butt plugs. 78 00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:36,782 Alan, you do realize that money will go to his next of kin. 79 00:03:36,784 --> 00:03:38,451 Uh, yeah. That's me. 80 00:03:38,453 --> 00:03:41,020 Why do think I keep going... (whimpers) 81 00:03:41,022 --> 00:03:42,855 What about your mother and his daughter? 82 00:03:42,857 --> 00:03:45,224 (laughing) 83 00:03:45,226 --> 00:03:47,193 Oh, you're serious. 84 00:03:47,195 --> 00:03:50,296 Alan, you can't keep that kind of money secret from them. 85 00:03:50,298 --> 00:03:51,630 Why not? I kept from you 86 00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:53,799 that I used your Tesla to drive for Uber. 87 00:03:56,603 --> 00:03:58,704 Hello. Yes, I-I just received a notice 88 00:03:58,706 --> 00:04:01,374 of unclaimed royalties for Charlie Harper 89 00:04:01,376 --> 00:04:03,609 that I would like to claim. 90 00:04:03,611 --> 00:04:05,511 Oh, oh, yeah, sure, I'll hold. 91 00:04:05,513 --> 00:04:07,646 What are you doing? Uh, claiming. 92 00:04:09,049 --> 00:04:10,049 Uh, yes, yes. Hi. 93 00:04:10,051 --> 00:04:11,317 Uh, I am, uh, Alan Harper. 94 00:04:11,319 --> 00:04:13,219 Uh, I'm Charlie Harper's next of kin. 95 00:04:13,221 --> 00:04:16,889 Yes, uh, uh, sadly, he-he passed away four years ago. 96 00:04:16,891 --> 00:04:18,524 Yes, I-I am sorry, too. 97 00:04:18,526 --> 00:04:20,726 Uh, he's irreplaceable. 98 00:04:25,999 --> 00:04:28,000 Uh, anyway, um... 99 00:04:28,002 --> 00:04:31,971 I guess you can just, you know, send me the check and... 100 00:04:31,973 --> 00:04:34,306 Uh, death certificate? 101 00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:37,176 Uh, o-okay, uh, is that... 102 00:04:37,178 --> 00:04:40,112 is that necessary to get the money? 103 00:04:40,114 --> 00:04:42,782 Okay. Uh, how about, uh, you send me the check, 104 00:04:42,784 --> 00:04:44,884 I'll send you the death certificate? 105 00:04:47,421 --> 00:04:49,522 Or we can do it your way. 106 00:04:49,524 --> 00:04:51,323 Uh, uh, oh, oh, 107 00:04:51,325 --> 00:04:53,793 and by the way, um, uh, when you give me the money, 108 00:04:53,795 --> 00:04:57,096 do you notify the IRS, or is that my responsibility? 109 00:04:57,098 --> 00:04:58,998 Mine! Perfect. 110 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:01,200 Uh, bye-bye. 111 00:05:01,202 --> 00:05:02,368 Our divorce is final, right? 112 00:05:03,770 --> 00:05:06,639 Alan, I neither want nor need your money. 113 00:05:06,641 --> 00:05:07,907 Oh, I know that, uh, 114 00:05:07,909 --> 00:05:09,809 but could you say that again on camera? 115 00:05:09,811 --> 00:05:11,844 O-Okay, okay. 116 00:05:11,846 --> 00:05:13,913 You don't have the death certificate, do you? 117 00:05:13,915 --> 00:05:15,080 No, but I'm sure my mom does. 118 00:05:15,082 --> 00:05:16,849 How are you going to get it from her 119 00:05:16,851 --> 00:05:18,050 without telling her about the money? 120 00:05:18,052 --> 00:05:19,251 Uh, remember four years ago 121 00:05:19,253 --> 00:05:21,454 how I told you I'd only be here for a few days? 122 00:05:21,456 --> 00:05:22,755 I think I can figure it out. 123 00:05:26,626 --> 00:05:28,894 I can't wait for this to be over. 124 00:05:30,397 --> 00:05:31,997 ♪ Men. ♪ 125 00:05:31,999 --> 00:05:33,732 Well, this is a surprise. 126 00:05:33,734 --> 00:05:35,501 You visit so seldom. 127 00:05:35,503 --> 00:05:36,769 I know. I know. 128 00:05:36,771 --> 00:05:38,070 I need to do it more. 129 00:05:38,072 --> 00:05:40,639 I wasn't complaining. 130 00:05:41,775 --> 00:05:44,743 So, how have you been? 131 00:05:44,745 --> 00:05:46,479 Well, uh, uh, it's funny you should ask. 132 00:05:46,481 --> 00:05:48,514 Um, I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. 133 00:05:48,516 --> 00:05:50,783 I'm not giving you a penny. 134 00:05:50,785 --> 00:05:52,618 I, uh... I didn't come for money. 135 00:05:52,620 --> 00:05:54,520 Or a place to live or a car. 136 00:05:54,522 --> 00:05:56,789 Or affection or nurturing. I get it. 137 00:05:56,791 --> 00:05:58,123 Uh, uh, I was thinking. 138 00:05:58,125 --> 00:06:00,459 You know, um, well, maybe it's my age, but, uh, 139 00:06:00,461 --> 00:06:02,628 I'm starting to reflect on the big questions. 140 00:06:02,630 --> 00:06:04,129 You know, what's... what's it all about? 141 00:06:04,131 --> 00:06:05,464 Uh, why are we here? 142 00:06:05,466 --> 00:06:06,866 What happens when we die? 143 00:06:06,868 --> 00:06:08,467 I know what happens when I die. 144 00:06:08,469 --> 00:06:10,369 You get nothing. 145 00:06:10,371 --> 00:06:12,872 Mom, I-I told you, I did not come here... 146 00:06:12,874 --> 00:06:14,139 Really? Nothing? 147 00:06:14,141 --> 00:06:16,275 It's not because I don't love you. 148 00:06:16,277 --> 00:06:19,378 I just don't want to give you a reason to kill me. 149 00:06:19,380 --> 00:06:22,181 You mean another reason. 150 00:06:28,788 --> 00:06:31,790 Where are all these morbid thoughts coming from? 151 00:06:31,792 --> 00:06:33,125 As long as I've known you, 152 00:06:33,127 --> 00:06:35,027 you've never been much of a thinker. 153 00:06:35,029 --> 00:06:39,031 Or a... a doer or a provider or... 154 00:06:39,033 --> 00:06:43,002 pretty much anything with "er" at the end. 155 00:06:43,004 --> 00:06:46,205 Maybe I've been asking all these questions because 156 00:06:46,207 --> 00:06:48,340 the anniversary of Charlie's death is coming up. 157 00:06:48,342 --> 00:06:50,142 So? - So I was thinking 158 00:06:50,144 --> 00:06:52,945 it might be nice to do something to commemorate it. 159 00:06:52,947 --> 00:06:56,982 Like what? Snort coke off a hooker's butt? 160 00:06:58,151 --> 00:07:01,086 Uh, actually, uh, uh, more like, uh, 161 00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:03,322 make a... a memorial collage. 162 00:07:03,324 --> 00:07:06,659 (laughs) A what? 163 00:07:06,661 --> 00:07:08,060 A... a memorial collage. 164 00:07:08,062 --> 00:07:10,896 You know, a collection of images celebrating his life. 165 00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:13,198 Uh, things like, uh, his birth certificate, 166 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:15,134 uh, family pictures, death certificate, 167 00:07:15,136 --> 00:07:17,136 uh, awards, sheet music, diplomas, 168 00:07:17,138 --> 00:07:18,737 death certificate, um... 169 00:07:18,739 --> 00:07:20,606 I don't know how much I can help you. 170 00:07:20,608 --> 00:07:21,807 I-I've got his birth certificate, 171 00:07:21,809 --> 00:07:23,108 a few baby pictures, 172 00:07:23,110 --> 00:07:25,344 the little hash pipe he made in camp. 173 00:07:26,379 --> 00:07:27,713 No death certificate? 174 00:07:27,715 --> 00:07:28,981 No. 175 00:07:28,983 --> 00:07:30,249 I-I just thought you had it. 176 00:07:30,251 --> 00:07:31,251 Oh. Well, bye. 177 00:07:34,387 --> 00:07:36,322 ♪ Men. ♪ 178 00:07:36,324 --> 00:07:39,725 I'm sorry. I can't find any record of your brother's death. 179 00:07:39,727 --> 00:07:42,127 You sure? Uh, newspapers, obituaries? 180 00:07:42,129 --> 00:07:43,862 No, I checked everything on Charlie Harper... 181 00:07:43,864 --> 00:07:45,998 Both here and in France... and... 182 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:49,735 I-I found a bunch of weird self-shot sex videos, 183 00:07:49,737 --> 00:07:52,671 including one featuring what appears to be 184 00:07:52,673 --> 00:07:56,442 the USC men's water polo team? 185 00:07:56,444 --> 00:08:01,313 I also found this crazy rant about a former employer. 186 00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:11,857 But there's nothing about his death. 187 00:08:11,859 --> 00:08:13,359 How is that possible? 188 00:08:13,361 --> 00:08:14,827 Did you ever see the body? 189 00:08:14,829 --> 00:08:17,096 There was no body. The man was hit by a train. 190 00:08:17,098 --> 00:08:18,330 All that was left was a... 191 00:08:18,332 --> 00:08:20,332 a meat smoothie and a couple of teeth. 192 00:08:20,334 --> 00:08:22,701 Well, how do you know he's really dead? 193 00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:24,703 Well, of course he's dead. I have his ashes. 194 00:08:24,705 --> 00:08:26,805 How do you know that they're his ashes? 195 00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:29,341 Well, what do you want me to do, test them for herpes? 196 00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:34,246 ♪ Men. ♪ 197 00:08:34,248 --> 00:08:37,549 ♪ Twinkle, twinkle, little star ♪ 198 00:08:37,551 --> 00:08:41,120 ♪ I always know just where you are ♪ 199 00:08:41,122 --> 00:08:44,390 ♪ In a pit below my house 200 00:08:44,392 --> 00:08:47,926 ♪ You will always be my spouse. ♪ 201 00:08:51,264 --> 00:08:53,932 Oh, boy. 202 00:08:56,936 --> 00:08:58,270 (clicks tongue, sighs) 203 00:08:58,272 --> 00:09:00,372 Never put a window in a dungeon. 204 00:09:01,408 --> 00:09:03,575 ♪ Men. ♪ 205 00:09:10,396 --> 00:09:12,597 ♪ Men. ♪ 206 00:09:13,766 --> 00:09:16,802 Yes, I am calling about the $2.5 million 207 00:09:16,804 --> 00:09:19,404 in unclaimed royalties for Charlie Harper. 208 00:09:19,406 --> 00:09:21,173 Uh, uh, good news. 209 00:09:21,175 --> 00:09:22,607 Uh, I have just received 210 00:09:22,609 --> 00:09:24,442 the death certificate from France. 211 00:09:24,444 --> 00:09:26,278 Uh, it's in French and everything 212 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:28,613 so you know it's real. 213 00:09:28,615 --> 00:09:30,649 Oh, oh, sure, I'll hold. 214 00:09:30,651 --> 00:09:33,685 Uh, "cause de décès." 215 00:09:33,687 --> 00:09:37,989 Uh... uh, Le... 216 00:09:37,991 --> 00:09:40,492 train. 217 00:09:40,494 --> 00:09:42,828 Oh, yes, yes, I'm still here. 218 00:09:42,830 --> 00:09:44,529 What? 219 00:09:44,531 --> 00:09:46,064 It's already been claimed? 220 00:09:46,066 --> 00:09:47,632 By whom? 221 00:09:47,634 --> 00:09:49,534 Was it an older red-headed woman 222 00:09:49,536 --> 00:09:51,937 wearing a coat made of Dalmatians? 223 00:09:53,406 --> 00:09:55,440 What do you mean, you can't tell me? 224 00:09:55,442 --> 00:09:57,742 A... a numbered account in the Cayman Islands? 225 00:09:57,744 --> 00:09:59,711 That makes no sense. 226 00:09:59,713 --> 00:10:02,914 FedEx just dropped off a box addressed to Charlie. 227 00:10:02,916 --> 00:10:05,116 Uh... uh, uh, I'll call you back. 228 00:10:06,485 --> 00:10:09,588 If that's a blow-up sex doll, can I have it? 229 00:10:10,790 --> 00:10:13,458 My grandkids need a pool toy. 230 00:10:16,362 --> 00:10:18,263 Cuban cigars? 231 00:10:18,265 --> 00:10:20,131 Charlie's favorite smokes. 232 00:10:21,534 --> 00:10:23,268 Single malt scotch? 233 00:10:23,270 --> 00:10:25,871 Charlie's favorite breakfast. 234 00:10:27,139 --> 00:10:28,673 What the hell? 235 00:10:28,675 --> 00:10:31,276 Looks the knife he used to chase you around the house with. 236 00:10:33,813 --> 00:10:35,580 Yeah, that's it. 237 00:10:36,983 --> 00:10:38,350 (cell phone beeps) 238 00:10:41,387 --> 00:10:44,956 "I'm coming home, and you're going to pay." 239 00:10:44,958 --> 00:10:46,691 That's got to be a wrong number. 240 00:10:46,693 --> 00:10:48,660 You never pay for anything. 241 00:10:51,063 --> 00:10:52,731 ♪ Men. ♪ 242 00:10:52,733 --> 00:10:54,232 Walden! - Alan? 243 00:10:54,234 --> 00:10:56,201 Ms. McMartin, I'm sorry. Uh, where's Walden? 244 00:10:56,203 --> 00:10:58,436 WALDEN (muffled): I'm a little busy, Alan. 245 00:10:58,438 --> 00:10:59,804 Oh, okay. 246 00:10:59,806 --> 00:11:02,641 Uh, are-are you aware she's reading Cosmo? 247 00:11:02,643 --> 00:11:04,276 It's a how-to article. 248 00:11:04,278 --> 00:11:06,411 WALDEN: Well, it's not so much "how to," 249 00:11:06,413 --> 00:11:08,713 as "how to do it better." 250 00:11:08,715 --> 00:11:10,248 Seriously? 251 00:11:11,484 --> 00:11:14,653 Hey. Even Tiger Woods needs a swing coach. 252 00:11:14,655 --> 00:11:15,820 Listen, can you 253 00:11:15,822 --> 00:11:18,323 just come back in, like, what, 20 minutes? 254 00:11:18,325 --> 00:11:20,125 Eh... 255 00:11:20,127 --> 00:11:22,394 No. This can't wait. Look at this text. 256 00:11:22,396 --> 00:11:23,595 (sighs) 257 00:11:23,597 --> 00:11:25,096 Okay, that can't be for you. 258 00:11:25,098 --> 00:11:26,865 You never pay for anything. 259 00:11:26,867 --> 00:11:29,234 I think, somehow, some way... 260 00:11:29,236 --> 00:11:31,336 (whispering): Charlie is still alive. 261 00:11:31,338 --> 00:11:33,038 Okay, this is ridiculous. 262 00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:35,540 There's more. A package came addressed to him. 263 00:11:35,542 --> 00:11:37,509 Oh, is it something that vibrates? 264 00:11:37,511 --> 00:11:40,378 'Cause I could really use some help with this. 265 00:11:41,681 --> 00:11:43,381 He ain't lying. 266 00:11:44,483 --> 00:11:46,651 No. It's-it's-it's not sex toys. 267 00:11:46,653 --> 00:11:48,453 I am telling you, Charlie is coming back, 268 00:11:48,455 --> 00:11:50,021 and he is not happy with me. 269 00:11:50,023 --> 00:11:51,656 Well, at the moment, neither am I. 270 00:11:51,658 --> 00:11:52,857 Should I go? 271 00:11:52,859 --> 00:11:54,559 No, no, no, no, no. We're so close. 272 00:11:54,561 --> 00:11:56,461 Eh-eh... 273 00:11:56,463 --> 00:11:58,163 Walden, it's like you said. 274 00:11:58,165 --> 00:12:00,265 I mean, there was no proof that Charlie ever died. 275 00:12:00,267 --> 00:12:01,766 All we have is Rose's word. 276 00:12:01,768 --> 00:12:02,867 Who's Rose? 277 00:12:02,869 --> 00:12:04,736 Oh, she's this crazy millionairess 278 00:12:04,738 --> 00:12:06,071 that used to stalk Charlie, 279 00:12:06,073 --> 00:12:07,572 and then he married her. 280 00:12:07,574 --> 00:12:09,274 And then she started stalking me. 281 00:12:09,276 --> 00:12:11,009 Why? Did you sleep with her? 282 00:12:13,446 --> 00:12:15,046 Alan slept with her, too. 283 00:12:15,048 --> 00:12:16,715 Hey, after 12 years, 284 00:12:16,717 --> 00:12:18,450 everybody's slept with everybody. 285 00:12:18,452 --> 00:12:21,052 EVELYN: Alan! Alan, where are you? 286 00:12:21,054 --> 00:12:22,620 Uh, in here! 287 00:12:22,622 --> 00:12:24,556 Oh, for God sakes! 288 00:12:24,558 --> 00:12:26,458 That's my mother. Uh, oh, Walden slept with her, too. 289 00:12:26,460 --> 00:12:28,960 Uh... you slept with my mom! 290 00:12:28,962 --> 00:12:31,396 No, that was just a handy in a hotel bar. 291 00:12:31,398 --> 00:12:32,864 I am a gentleman. 292 00:12:34,266 --> 00:12:35,567 We need to talk. 293 00:12:35,569 --> 00:12:37,202 Oh. Who's this? 294 00:12:37,204 --> 00:12:40,638 Uh, this is my son's social worker, Ms. McMartin. 295 00:12:40,640 --> 00:12:42,741 And you're shtupping her. How lovely. 296 00:12:42,743 --> 00:12:44,175 Uh, Mom, don't be rude. 297 00:12:44,177 --> 00:12:45,910 Uh, and I shtupped her first. 298 00:12:45,912 --> 00:12:48,046 I really should go. 299 00:12:48,048 --> 00:12:49,581 Yeah. Uh, okay. 300 00:12:49,583 --> 00:12:51,216 Just remember which step we're on. 301 00:12:51,218 --> 00:12:52,717 Number six: 302 00:12:52,719 --> 00:12:55,720 "finding the little man in the canoe." 303 00:12:55,722 --> 00:12:57,722 I don't remember you having any trouble... 304 00:12:57,724 --> 00:12:59,524 Okay, everybody stop! 305 00:12:59,526 --> 00:13:01,726 What are you doing here? 306 00:13:01,728 --> 00:13:04,696 I want to know why you sent me this hateful e-mail. 307 00:13:06,032 --> 00:13:07,565 Uh, "Dear Mom:" 308 00:13:07,567 --> 00:13:09,534 "You were always a horrible mother 309 00:13:09,536 --> 00:13:11,202 "and a repulsive human being, 310 00:13:11,204 --> 00:13:12,971 "and I hope you rot in hell. 311 00:13:12,973 --> 00:13:14,639 "But before you do, 312 00:13:14,641 --> 00:13:17,175 I will have my revenge." 313 00:13:17,177 --> 00:13:20,812 Okay, I don't disagree with anything here... 314 00:13:21,947 --> 00:13:23,615 ...but I did not send that. 315 00:13:23,617 --> 00:13:27,252 Really? Who else would call me "a horrible mother"? 316 00:13:27,254 --> 00:13:29,254 No, no, it's still ridiculous. 317 00:13:29,256 --> 00:13:30,422 What's ridiculous? 318 00:13:30,424 --> 00:13:32,157 Alan has this crazy idea 319 00:13:32,159 --> 00:13:33,858 that Charlie's still alive. 320 00:13:33,860 --> 00:13:35,427 But then who sent her that e-mail? 321 00:13:35,429 --> 00:13:36,928 Who sent me this text? 322 00:13:36,930 --> 00:13:39,798 Where did the cigars, booze and chasin' knife come from? 323 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:41,533 Wait, what's a chasin' knife? 324 00:13:41,535 --> 00:13:42,634 Uh, it's a regular knife 325 00:13:42,636 --> 00:13:44,276 after two bottles of scotch and some blow. 326 00:13:46,672 --> 00:13:48,273 Who else would have sent it? 327 00:13:48,275 --> 00:13:49,574 I don't know. 328 00:13:49,576 --> 00:13:51,810 Like, somebody that wants to freak you out. 329 00:13:51,812 --> 00:13:53,912 Think about it: Who has something to gain from this? 330 00:13:53,914 --> 00:13:55,947 Who else has a claim on that money? 331 00:13:55,949 --> 00:13:56,949 What money? 332 00:13:56,950 --> 00:13:58,349 No money. There's no money. 333 00:13:58,351 --> 00:13:59,350 Alan, will you just tell her? 334 00:13:59,352 --> 00:14:01,219 (sighs) 335 00:14:01,221 --> 00:14:03,822 I don't want to. 336 00:14:03,824 --> 00:14:05,290 Alan! 337 00:14:05,292 --> 00:14:09,494 Turns out, uh, there are some unclaimed royalties, 338 00:14:09,496 --> 00:14:11,529 uh, from Charlie's recordings. 339 00:14:11,531 --> 00:14:13,164 How much? 340 00:14:13,166 --> 00:14:15,433 Uh, two and a half... thousand dollars. 341 00:14:15,435 --> 00:14:16,601 Alan! 342 00:14:16,603 --> 00:14:18,570 Million. 343 00:14:18,572 --> 00:14:21,272 $2.5 million. 344 00:14:21,274 --> 00:14:24,342 Ah, the memorial collage. 345 00:14:24,344 --> 00:14:26,845 That's why you wanted the death certificate... 346 00:14:26,847 --> 00:14:28,847 So you could claim the money. 347 00:14:28,849 --> 00:14:31,049 You dirty rat bastard. 348 00:14:31,051 --> 00:14:32,317 What would you have done? 349 00:14:33,719 --> 00:14:36,321 We're wasting time here. 350 00:14:36,323 --> 00:14:39,023 Now, who else could have a claim on the money? 351 00:14:39,025 --> 00:14:40,458 (Ms. McMartin moaning) 352 00:14:40,460 --> 00:14:41,793 MS. McMARTIN: Oh, God! 353 00:14:41,795 --> 00:14:42,961 Ah, damn it. 354 00:14:42,963 --> 00:14:44,929 She found the little man without me. 355 00:14:47,266 --> 00:14:48,967 ♪ Men. ♪ 356 00:14:48,969 --> 00:14:51,636 Anyway, we were thinking of putting together 357 00:14:51,638 --> 00:14:53,438 a sort of memorial collage... 358 00:14:53,440 --> 00:14:55,173 Oh, for God sakes, will you just tell her? 359 00:14:55,175 --> 00:15:00,078 Um, some money owed to your father has been discovered. 360 00:15:01,180 --> 00:15:02,847 Really? How much? 361 00:15:02,849 --> 00:15:04,215 Two and a half thousand. 362 00:15:04,217 --> 00:15:07,652 Million. It's $2.5 million. 363 00:15:07,654 --> 00:15:09,187 Why are you here? 364 00:15:09,189 --> 00:15:12,056 You know what? I've been asking myself that since day one. 365 00:15:26,005 --> 00:15:27,939 Honestly, I forgot she was here. 366 00:15:27,941 --> 00:15:29,941 Look, anyway, 367 00:15:29,943 --> 00:15:32,277 somebody claimed it and transferred it 368 00:15:32,279 --> 00:15:34,078 into a numbered account in the Caymans. 369 00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:35,613 And you think it was me? 370 00:15:35,615 --> 00:15:37,649 Would I be living in a one-bedroom apartment 371 00:15:37,651 --> 00:15:39,384 if I had that kind of money? 372 00:15:39,386 --> 00:15:40,718 (door opens) 373 00:15:48,894 --> 00:15:49,994 I don't have my contacts in. 374 00:15:49,996 --> 00:15:51,356 Was that the same one or different? 375 00:15:52,431 --> 00:15:53,932 (knock at door) 376 00:15:53,934 --> 00:15:55,233 Excuse me. 377 00:15:55,235 --> 00:15:57,302 Wow. You hang a penis on that girl, 378 00:15:57,304 --> 00:15:58,937 and you've got Charlie. 379 00:15:58,939 --> 00:16:00,772 (door opens) 380 00:16:00,774 --> 00:16:03,074 Thank you. Huh. 381 00:16:03,076 --> 00:16:04,442 Certified letter from a law firm. 382 00:16:04,444 --> 00:16:06,644 Might mean traveling money. Stand by. 383 00:16:07,813 --> 00:16:09,147 Oh, my God. 384 00:16:09,149 --> 00:16:10,415 What is it? 385 00:16:10,417 --> 00:16:12,684 Am I seeing that right? That's a lot of zeroes. 386 00:16:12,686 --> 00:16:15,787 It's a cashier's check for $100,000. 387 00:16:15,789 --> 00:16:17,021 (whimpers) 388 00:16:17,023 --> 00:16:18,356 Who's it from? 389 00:16:18,358 --> 00:16:20,425 I don't know. Oh, but there's a note. 390 00:16:20,427 --> 00:16:22,393 It says, "Buy yourself something nice. 391 00:16:22,395 --> 00:16:24,529 Sorry I wasn't there for you." 392 00:16:24,531 --> 00:16:25,897 I don't care who it's from. 393 00:16:25,899 --> 00:16:27,966 Apology accepted. 394 00:16:29,001 --> 00:16:31,269 Is the bathroom in here? 395 00:16:31,271 --> 00:16:33,905 ♪ Men. ♪ 396 00:16:33,907 --> 00:16:36,341 "Buy yourself something nice. 397 00:16:36,343 --> 00:16:38,343 "Sorry I broke your heart... 398 00:16:38,345 --> 00:16:40,445 "and banged your sister. 399 00:16:40,447 --> 00:16:44,315 As I write this, I realize those two things might be related." 400 00:16:47,653 --> 00:16:49,754 Hmm. Screw my sister. 401 00:16:49,756 --> 00:16:52,123 ♪ Men. ♪ 402 00:16:53,626 --> 00:16:55,460 "Buy yourself something nice. 403 00:16:55,462 --> 00:16:58,396 "Sorry I shot you. 404 00:16:58,398 --> 00:17:01,466 I didn't know I was loaded." 405 00:17:01,468 --> 00:17:03,868 ♪ Men. ♪ 406 00:17:03,870 --> 00:17:06,004 "Buy yourself something nice. 407 00:17:06,006 --> 00:17:08,806 Tell your mom I'm sorry I gave her chlamydia." 408 00:17:12,244 --> 00:17:14,012 ♪ Men. ♪ 409 00:17:14,014 --> 00:17:16,080 "Sorry I never called. 410 00:17:16,082 --> 00:17:18,316 Buy yourself a nice vagina." 411 00:17:19,685 --> 00:17:22,020 Aw. 412 00:17:22,022 --> 00:17:24,122 ♪ Men. ♪ 413 00:17:24,124 --> 00:17:26,724 Well, obviously Jenny didn't claim the royalties. 414 00:17:26,726 --> 00:17:28,493 Why would she send a check to herself? 415 00:17:28,495 --> 00:17:30,528 Yeah, but you still don't know it was Charlie. 416 00:17:30,530 --> 00:17:32,297 Oh, who else is going to send 417 00:17:32,299 --> 00:17:35,366 an unemployed lesbian actress $100,000? 418 00:17:35,368 --> 00:17:37,869 I don't know. Ellen DeGeneres? 419 00:17:39,271 --> 00:17:41,272 I'm telling you, Charlie's alive. 420 00:17:41,274 --> 00:17:42,840 ROSE: Oh, good. 421 00:17:42,842 --> 00:17:44,342 Then I don't have to tell you. 422 00:17:44,344 --> 00:17:47,545 ♪ Men, men, men. ♪ 423 00:17:55,597 --> 00:17:57,131 ♪ Men. ♪ 424 00:17:57,133 --> 00:17:58,966 Charlie is still alive? 425 00:17:58,969 --> 00:18:01,637 Yeah, kinda. 426 00:18:01,639 --> 00:18:03,105 What do you mean, "kinda"? 427 00:18:03,107 --> 00:18:05,207 'Cause she "kinda" drank when she was pregnant with me, 428 00:18:05,209 --> 00:18:07,443 and now I "kinda" can't do math. 429 00:18:07,445 --> 00:18:09,378 BERTA: Hey. 430 00:18:09,380 --> 00:18:11,480 Hey. What are you still doing here? 431 00:18:11,482 --> 00:18:14,216 Oh, I accidentally fell asleep in Zippy's room. 432 00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:16,985 How do you accidentally fall asleep? 433 00:18:16,987 --> 00:18:20,456 You accidentally wash down your pain pills with scotch. 434 00:18:23,726 --> 00:18:25,694 What's Fatal Attraction doing here? 435 00:18:27,297 --> 00:18:30,065 She says that Charlie is still alive. 436 00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:31,900 I knew it. 437 00:18:31,902 --> 00:18:32,968 Alan, 438 00:18:32,970 --> 00:18:34,870 if you move out 439 00:18:34,872 --> 00:18:37,639 and Charlie stays here with Walden, 440 00:18:37,641 --> 00:18:41,009 I believe that we can keep this going 441 00:18:41,011 --> 00:18:43,245 for another five years. 442 00:18:45,515 --> 00:18:47,382 Yeah, I don't think so. 443 00:18:47,384 --> 00:18:49,918 Uh... so, uh... 444 00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:51,954 what exactly happened to Charlie? 445 00:18:51,956 --> 00:18:53,188 Yeah, start from the beginning. 446 00:18:53,190 --> 00:18:55,791 You mean from the pilot? 447 00:18:55,793 --> 00:18:58,427 No, uh, what happened to my brother after you married him? 448 00:18:58,429 --> 00:18:59,628 Oh. 449 00:18:59,630 --> 00:19:01,897 Well, we had a wonderful wedding, 450 00:19:01,899 --> 00:19:05,100 and then we flew to Paris for our honeymoon. 451 00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:08,537 We were so happy. So animated. 452 00:19:08,539 --> 00:19:12,441 (both sighing) 453 00:19:12,443 --> 00:19:15,644 We went up on the Eiffel Tower... 454 00:19:15,646 --> 00:19:17,813 and went down on the Champs-Elysées. 455 00:19:17,815 --> 00:19:19,615 (sighs) 456 00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:21,049 Ooh! 457 00:19:21,051 --> 00:19:23,619 Afterwards, we celebrated our love 458 00:19:23,621 --> 00:19:26,855 with a romantic candlelit dinner at the Ritz. 459 00:19:28,391 --> 00:19:29,925 (vacuum cleaner whirring) 460 00:19:32,328 --> 00:19:34,863 (sighs, sniffs) 461 00:19:34,865 --> 00:19:37,866 Of course, I've always known Charlie was no saint, 462 00:19:37,868 --> 00:19:40,035 but I thought marriage would change him. 463 00:19:40,037 --> 00:19:41,169 Huh? 464 00:19:41,171 --> 00:19:43,472 I was wrong. 465 00:19:43,474 --> 00:19:45,207 So wrong. 466 00:19:45,209 --> 00:19:46,408 Huh? 467 00:19:46,410 --> 00:19:48,076 Disturbingly wrong. 468 00:19:48,078 --> 00:19:49,811 (bleats) 469 00:19:49,813 --> 00:19:52,681 I ran from the room, determined to never see him again. 470 00:19:52,683 --> 00:19:54,182 (bleating): Charlie... 471 00:19:54,184 --> 00:19:56,818 He finally caught up with me at the train station, 472 00:19:56,820 --> 00:19:58,453 but all I could think about was... 473 00:19:58,455 --> 00:20:00,055 (train whistle blowing) revenge. 474 00:20:00,057 --> 00:20:03,559 But at the last second, fate intervened. 475 00:20:05,595 --> 00:20:07,462 So I booked us a cruise home. 476 00:20:10,199 --> 00:20:13,368 We moved in to a brand-new house in Sherman Oaks... 477 00:20:13,370 --> 00:20:15,804 The good part, south of the boulevard... 478 00:20:15,806 --> 00:20:17,873 Where we could live as a happy couple. 479 00:20:17,875 --> 00:20:19,374 WALDEN: Wait a minute. 480 00:20:19,376 --> 00:20:21,476 You bought a house with a dungeon? 481 00:20:21,478 --> 00:20:23,078 And a pit? 482 00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:24,379 Of course not. 483 00:20:24,381 --> 00:20:25,814 I had it remodeled. 484 00:20:25,816 --> 00:20:28,283 The permit process was just a nightmare. 485 00:20:28,285 --> 00:20:29,952 Next time, use my pit guy. 486 00:20:29,954 --> 00:20:31,386 He's the best. 487 00:20:31,388 --> 00:20:33,522 Continue. 488 00:20:33,524 --> 00:20:35,390 ROSE: For the next four years, 489 00:20:35,392 --> 00:20:37,926 we were the happiest we'd ever been. 490 00:20:37,928 --> 00:20:40,062 I'd feed him... 491 00:20:40,064 --> 00:20:41,396 bathe him... 492 00:20:41,398 --> 00:20:44,066 and, of course, there was endless 493 00:20:44,068 --> 00:20:46,134 magical lovemaking. 494 00:20:46,136 --> 00:20:50,739 Then, a few days ago, the unthinkable happened. 495 00:20:50,741 --> 00:20:52,307 Somehow, he managed to make a rope 496 00:20:52,309 --> 00:20:54,576 out of his bowling shirts and ran away, 497 00:20:54,578 --> 00:20:56,979 disappearing into the darkness. 498 00:20:58,348 --> 00:20:59,681 (cartoony music playing) 499 00:20:59,683 --> 00:21:01,984 Th-Th-Th-That's all, folks. 500 00:21:03,286 --> 00:21:05,253 ♪ Men. ♪ 501 00:21:05,277 --> 00:21:09,277 ♪ Two and a Half Men 12x16 ♪ Of Course He's Dead Part 2 Original Air Date: 2015-02-19 502 00:21:11,564 --> 00:21:12,630 ♪ Men. ♪ 503 00:21:12,632 --> 00:21:13,865 Charlie escaped? 504 00:21:13,867 --> 00:21:15,233 Uh, no. 505 00:21:15,235 --> 00:21:16,634 Prisoners escape. 506 00:21:16,636 --> 00:21:19,237 Lovers run away because they're afraid of commitment. 507 00:21:20,572 --> 00:21:22,540 Any-who, I just thought I should tell you. 508 00:21:22,542 --> 00:21:26,978 You know, in case he drops by and guts you all like fish. 509 00:21:26,980 --> 00:21:29,414 Why me? He doesn't even know me. 510 00:21:29,416 --> 00:21:31,582 Oh, I told him all about you... 511 00:21:31,584 --> 00:21:33,618 How you're richer than him, prettier than him, 512 00:21:33,620 --> 00:21:35,486 and moved into his house and carried on 513 00:21:35,488 --> 00:21:37,121 like he never existed. 514 00:21:38,157 --> 00:21:41,059 Thank you. 515 00:21:41,061 --> 00:21:42,427 Hold on, Rose. 516 00:21:42,429 --> 00:21:45,663 If Charlie is alive, who's in the urn? 517 00:21:45,665 --> 00:21:47,665 Oh. That's Billy. 518 00:21:47,667 --> 00:21:49,400 Who's Billy? 519 00:21:49,402 --> 00:21:50,802 The bisexual goat 520 00:21:50,804 --> 00:21:53,237 who gave his life that your son might live. 521 00:21:55,007 --> 00:21:57,375 So... so, what are we supposed to do now? 522 00:21:57,377 --> 00:21:58,609 Wait a second. 523 00:21:58,611 --> 00:22:01,446 Are we really not gonna talk about the fact 524 00:22:01,448 --> 00:22:03,848 that Charlie was having sex with a goat? 525 00:22:03,850 --> 00:22:05,683 Well, you didn't know Charlie. 526 00:22:05,685 --> 00:22:08,453 It would have been weirder if he hadn't. 527 00:22:08,455 --> 00:22:10,488 Well, now that you're all caught up, 528 00:22:10,490 --> 00:22:12,190 I'll say my good-byes. 529 00:22:12,192 --> 00:22:13,192 You're leaving? 530 00:22:13,193 --> 00:22:14,358 Um, yeah. 531 00:22:14,360 --> 00:22:16,060 I'm not gonna stick around to find out 532 00:22:16,062 --> 00:22:18,996 what he's going to do to me just because I loved him too much. 533 00:22:18,998 --> 00:22:20,665 Toodles. 534 00:22:24,603 --> 00:22:26,838 Nah. That's just stupid. 535 00:22:30,309 --> 00:22:32,777 No... no, no, no, no, this is ridiculous. 536 00:22:32,779 --> 00:22:34,712 He's not gonna hurt anybody. 537 00:22:34,714 --> 00:22:36,714 Oh, of course not. 538 00:22:36,716 --> 00:22:38,716 Rose, wait up. 539 00:22:38,718 --> 00:22:40,518 What, you're... you're leaving, too? 540 00:22:40,520 --> 00:22:42,787 Alan, your brother wasn't very pleasant 541 00:22:42,789 --> 00:22:44,322 if he missed his morning coffee. 542 00:22:44,324 --> 00:22:46,124 How do you think he's going to be 543 00:22:46,126 --> 00:22:47,992 after four years in a pit? 544 00:22:47,994 --> 00:22:49,827 So you're just gonna bail? 545 00:22:49,829 --> 00:22:51,929 Uh... yep. 546 00:22:53,332 --> 00:22:54,832 Berta, good-bye. 547 00:22:54,834 --> 00:22:57,468 I never really cared for you. 548 00:22:58,737 --> 00:23:00,571 Right back at you, Red. 549 00:23:00,573 --> 00:23:02,540 Walden... 550 00:23:04,009 --> 00:23:06,177 I loved you like a son. 551 00:23:07,513 --> 00:23:10,047 Alan... 552 00:23:10,049 --> 00:23:12,383 good luck. 553 00:23:15,254 --> 00:23:17,655 Well, I-I guess we should go, too. 554 00:23:17,657 --> 00:23:18,856 Hold on. 555 00:23:18,858 --> 00:23:20,324 We're not really gonna run 556 00:23:20,326 --> 00:23:22,426 'cause of some crazy woman's story 557 00:23:22,428 --> 00:23:24,729 and some vague text threats. 558 00:23:24,731 --> 00:23:26,164 (cell phone chimes) 559 00:23:29,635 --> 00:23:31,502 Okay, this one's a little more specific. 560 00:23:31,504 --> 00:23:33,437 What does it say? 561 00:23:33,439 --> 00:23:36,707 "You despicable troll. 562 00:23:36,709 --> 00:23:39,811 "You thought you could replace my ninja awesomeness, 563 00:23:39,813 --> 00:23:41,546 "you lame clown? 564 00:23:41,548 --> 00:23:45,650 "I will deploy my army of assassins to destroy you. 565 00:23:45,652 --> 00:23:47,819 "I will bring my bayonets of truth 566 00:23:47,821 --> 00:23:50,688 "to the hexagon of death, 567 00:23:50,690 --> 00:23:55,726 "where I will carve my initials into your reptilian skull 568 00:23:55,728 --> 00:23:58,563 and cover you in tiger's blood." 569 00:24:03,435 --> 00:24:07,004 Hard to believe he wrote children's songs, isn't it? 570 00:24:07,006 --> 00:24:08,439 Yeah, we're gonna need some help. 571 00:24:08,441 --> 00:24:10,374 Yeah, we're gonna need a lot of help. 572 00:24:10,376 --> 00:24:12,410 Here, try these. 573 00:24:12,412 --> 00:24:14,378 They won't keep him from hurting you, 574 00:24:14,380 --> 00:24:16,914 but they will keep you from feeling it. 575 00:24:18,584 --> 00:24:20,551 ♪ Men. ♪ 576 00:24:20,553 --> 00:24:22,453 Uh, thank you for meeting with us 577 00:24:22,455 --> 00:24:24,322 on such short notice, Lieutenant. 578 00:24:24,324 --> 00:24:26,090 Anything for you, my friend. 579 00:24:26,092 --> 00:24:27,525 How can I help? 580 00:24:27,527 --> 00:24:29,026 ♪ Men. ♪ 581 00:24:35,087 --> 00:24:36,354 ♪ Men. ♪ 582 00:24:36,356 --> 00:24:39,274 So, uh, that's about it, uh, uh, Lieutenant... 583 00:24:39,450 --> 00:24:41,083 Wagner. Uh, Wagner. 584 00:24:41,085 --> 00:24:42,885 No, not Wagner; Wagner. 585 00:24:42,887 --> 00:24:46,789 Uh, W-A-G-N-E-R. Wagner. 586 00:24:46,791 --> 00:24:49,458 "Vhatever." 587 00:24:52,195 --> 00:24:55,131 All right, now, let me see if I got this straight. 588 00:24:55,133 --> 00:24:58,801 12 years ago, your wife kicked you out, 589 00:24:58,803 --> 00:25:01,971 and then you and your dumb son moved in with your brother. 590 00:25:03,473 --> 00:25:05,941 Uh, uh, he wasn't dumb at the beginning. 591 00:25:05,943 --> 00:25:08,677 Uh, he got dumb later on. 592 00:25:08,679 --> 00:25:09,745 What happened? 593 00:25:09,747 --> 00:25:12,581 Uh, well, turned out it was funnier. 594 00:25:12,583 --> 00:25:13,983 All right. 595 00:25:13,985 --> 00:25:15,818 So your brother then let you stay there 596 00:25:15,820 --> 00:25:17,720 eight and a half years rent-free, 597 00:25:17,722 --> 00:25:19,788 even though you claim that he never liked you. 598 00:25:19,790 --> 00:25:23,559 Ah. Ah, you're not the only one to point out the illogic. 599 00:25:24,961 --> 00:25:28,597 And this brother of yours supposedly died in Paris 600 00:25:28,599 --> 00:25:30,533 under mysterious circumstances. 601 00:25:30,535 --> 00:25:31,901 It wasn't all that mysterious. 602 00:25:31,903 --> 00:25:33,769 I mean, he was taking a lot of drugs 603 00:25:33,771 --> 00:25:36,105 and pissed off almost everybody. 604 00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:39,642 And then you tried to drown yourself, 605 00:25:39,644 --> 00:25:43,078 but you changed your mind because the water was too cold. 606 00:25:45,615 --> 00:25:48,651 And then you got into his house and offered to buy it. 607 00:25:48,653 --> 00:25:52,388 It seemed like a good idea at the time. 608 00:25:52,390 --> 00:25:57,293 And then you let him and his son stay there for four more years. 609 00:25:57,295 --> 00:25:58,561 Right. 610 00:25:58,563 --> 00:25:59,595 Rent-free. 611 00:26:00,697 --> 00:26:02,364 Well, when you say it like that, 612 00:26:02,366 --> 00:26:05,301 it sounds ridiculous. 613 00:26:05,303 --> 00:26:06,702 And then your dead brother's 614 00:26:06,704 --> 00:26:08,871 previously unknown lesbian daughter shows up, 615 00:26:08,873 --> 00:26:10,673 and then you let her move in. 616 00:26:10,675 --> 00:26:13,342 (chuckles) You can't write this stuff, huh? 617 00:26:14,644 --> 00:26:17,313 And then the two of you got married to each other. 618 00:26:19,249 --> 00:26:21,250 Yes. 619 00:26:21,252 --> 00:26:22,351 But you're not gay. 620 00:26:22,353 --> 00:26:24,253 Well, I'm not. 621 00:26:25,288 --> 00:26:27,723 And then you adopted a black child. 622 00:26:27,725 --> 00:26:30,159 Ah, ah, he's, uh... he's more Eurasian. 623 00:26:30,161 --> 00:26:31,694 Uh... 624 00:26:33,196 --> 00:26:35,664 Oh, what a sweetie pie. 625 00:26:37,867 --> 00:26:39,702 And the two of you are now divorced? 626 00:26:39,704 --> 00:26:40,569 Mmm. 627 00:26:40,571 --> 00:26:41,570 But you're living together. 628 00:26:41,572 --> 00:26:44,540 If I leave, the whole thing falls apart. 629 00:26:45,575 --> 00:26:47,042 Yeah, of course. 630 00:26:47,044 --> 00:26:50,179 Uh, and now the woman who stalked your brother 631 00:26:50,181 --> 00:26:51,647 and then married him 632 00:26:51,649 --> 00:26:53,649 all of a sudden shows up and she says 633 00:26:53,651 --> 00:26:56,452 that he's not dead after all, that she has been keeping him 634 00:26:56,454 --> 00:26:58,854 in a dungeon pit in the San Fernando Valley. 635 00:26:58,856 --> 00:27:00,122 Ah, uh, Sherman Oaks. 636 00:27:00,124 --> 00:27:03,259 Uh, but the good part... Uh, south of the boulevard. 637 00:27:04,761 --> 00:27:06,028 And then he escaped, 638 00:27:06,030 --> 00:27:07,963 and he sent you cigars and whiskey. 639 00:27:07,965 --> 00:27:09,999 Oh, and don't forget the chasin' knife. 640 00:27:10,001 --> 00:27:11,467 Oh, and the threatening text. 641 00:27:11,469 --> 00:27:12,968 He said, uh, "I'm coming home, 642 00:27:12,970 --> 00:27:14,536 and you're gonna pay." 643 00:27:14,538 --> 00:27:16,138 I'm confused. 644 00:27:16,140 --> 00:27:19,108 'Cause you said he doesn't pay for anything. 645 00:27:21,845 --> 00:27:23,212 I think the point is, 646 00:27:23,214 --> 00:27:25,481 is that we need you to find him becau... 647 00:27:25,483 --> 00:27:28,217 This guy has some serious rage issues. 648 00:27:28,219 --> 00:27:30,819 Has he tried anger management? 649 00:27:30,821 --> 00:27:33,055 Yeah, but it didn't work. 650 00:27:35,892 --> 00:27:37,893 Okay. 651 00:27:37,895 --> 00:27:40,896 Well, I have this inscription now, 652 00:27:40,898 --> 00:27:44,566 and so if we find him, I'll let you know. 653 00:27:44,568 --> 00:27:45,634 Uh, well... - Thank you. 654 00:27:45,636 --> 00:27:47,102 Uh, really appreciate it. 655 00:27:47,104 --> 00:27:48,404 No problem. 656 00:27:48,406 --> 00:27:50,272 Now, if I can, uh, 657 00:27:50,274 --> 00:27:52,007 offer you a word of advice... 658 00:27:52,009 --> 00:27:53,375 Mm-hmm? 659 00:27:53,377 --> 00:27:55,010 I would consider wrapping this whole thing up. 660 00:27:55,012 --> 00:27:56,378 Uh, what do you mean? 661 00:27:56,380 --> 00:27:58,547 I mean the whole living arrangement. 662 00:27:58,549 --> 00:28:01,116 The kids, the girls, the beach house. 663 00:28:01,118 --> 00:28:05,154 I mean, this whole thing has been going on way too long. 664 00:28:06,189 --> 00:28:09,091 Yeah, a lot of people been saying that. 665 00:28:09,093 --> 00:28:11,393 Haters gonna hate. 666 00:28:13,963 --> 00:28:15,764 ♪ Men. ♪ 667 00:28:15,766 --> 00:28:18,033 We should get out of town for a couple of days. 668 00:28:18,035 --> 00:28:19,735 You know, go to a nice resort, 669 00:28:19,737 --> 00:28:21,704 uh, get some facials, Mani-pedis. 670 00:28:21,706 --> 00:28:23,272 You know, a guys' weekend. 671 00:28:23,274 --> 00:28:25,140 No... we're not going anywhere. 672 00:28:25,142 --> 00:28:27,276 We got a state-of-the-art security system. 673 00:28:27,278 --> 00:28:30,446 Nobody gets in unless we let them in. 674 00:28:31,481 --> 00:28:33,649 (both screaming) 675 00:28:35,518 --> 00:28:38,587 What the hell? 676 00:28:38,589 --> 00:28:40,489 "We got a state-of-the-art security system. 677 00:28:40,491 --> 00:28:42,524 No one gets in unless we let them in." 678 00:28:42,526 --> 00:28:44,560 Shut up. No, you shut up. 679 00:28:44,562 --> 00:28:46,428 Hey. - (both scream) 680 00:28:52,802 --> 00:28:54,436 Jake? - Oh, my God. Oh, my God! 681 00:28:54,438 --> 00:28:55,671 Oh, my God. 682 00:28:55,673 --> 00:28:56,772 (laughing) 683 00:28:56,774 --> 00:28:58,440 Hey! 684 00:28:58,442 --> 00:28:59,641 What are you doing here? 685 00:28:59,643 --> 00:29:01,343 Yeah, I thought you were in the Army. 686 00:29:01,345 --> 00:29:02,711 Come on. Look at me. 687 00:29:02,713 --> 00:29:05,280 Do I look like someone who's in the Army? 688 00:29:05,282 --> 00:29:06,548 Not on our side. 689 00:29:08,318 --> 00:29:10,919 Come in. 690 00:29:10,921 --> 00:29:13,956 Hey. These are pretty cool. Where'd you get them? Target? 691 00:29:13,958 --> 00:29:15,424 (laughs) 692 00:29:15,426 --> 00:29:17,126 You get it? 'Cause of the... there's the circles... 693 00:29:17,128 --> 00:29:19,194 Yeah, no, no, I got it. I got it. No. 694 00:29:19,196 --> 00:29:20,496 Here's the thing. 695 00:29:20,498 --> 00:29:22,164 It turns out that your Uncle Charlie 696 00:29:22,166 --> 00:29:23,565 might still be alive. 697 00:29:23,567 --> 00:29:24,900 Oh. 698 00:29:24,902 --> 00:29:28,203 That would explain why I got a check for $250,000 699 00:29:28,205 --> 00:29:30,606 and a note that said, "I'm alive." 700 00:29:31,708 --> 00:29:33,876 You have $250,000? 701 00:29:33,878 --> 00:29:36,178 Not anymore. I stopped in in Vegas on the way here. 702 00:29:36,180 --> 00:29:38,480 Oh, God. How much do you have left? 703 00:29:38,482 --> 00:29:40,516 Two and a half million. 704 00:29:40,518 --> 00:29:42,084 (whimpers) 705 00:29:42,086 --> 00:29:43,519 Oh! 706 00:29:43,521 --> 00:29:46,522 You won $2.5 million? 707 00:29:46,524 --> 00:29:48,090 Oh, yeah. It's not that hard. 708 00:29:48,092 --> 00:29:51,326 I kept playing craps because, you know, "crap." 709 00:29:52,896 --> 00:29:55,063 Oh, and I kept betting on come, because... 710 00:29:55,065 --> 00:29:57,900 (laughing) 711 00:29:57,902 --> 00:30:02,104 Wow. That's... amazing that you made so much money 712 00:30:02,106 --> 00:30:04,239 with such stupid jokes. 713 00:30:11,214 --> 00:30:12,214 Taterhead! 714 00:30:13,917 --> 00:30:15,317 Hey, Berta. 715 00:30:15,319 --> 00:30:17,219 Oh, look at you! 716 00:30:17,221 --> 00:30:18,954 You look like a grown man. 717 00:30:18,956 --> 00:30:21,056 Really? Which one? 718 00:30:21,058 --> 00:30:23,225 I've missed you. 719 00:30:23,227 --> 00:30:24,893 Berta, what are you still doing here? 720 00:30:24,895 --> 00:30:26,228 No idea. 721 00:30:27,964 --> 00:30:29,865 By the way, you're out of pot. 722 00:30:31,634 --> 00:30:33,569 Where'd these things come from? Target? 723 00:30:33,571 --> 00:30:34,571 JAKE: Ah. 724 00:30:34,572 --> 00:30:35,704 Too late. 725 00:30:35,706 --> 00:30:37,306 I already did that joke. Ah... 726 00:30:37,308 --> 00:30:38,574 No, somebody left them here. 727 00:30:38,576 --> 00:30:39,808 You didn't hear anything? 728 00:30:39,810 --> 00:30:41,243 I heard colors. 729 00:30:41,245 --> 00:30:43,145 No, I-I am telling you, 730 00:30:43,147 --> 00:30:45,647 Charlie is planning on killing us all. 731 00:30:45,649 --> 00:30:47,549 Okay. It was good to see you guys. 732 00:30:47,551 --> 00:30:49,551 Wait, Th-that's it? You're leaving? 733 00:30:49,553 --> 00:30:51,854 Oh, nothing personal... I just got to get back to Japan 734 00:30:51,856 --> 00:30:53,922 and tell my wife and kids that we're rich. 735 00:30:53,924 --> 00:30:55,591 You're... you're married? 736 00:30:55,593 --> 00:30:56,925 Yeah. Didn't I mention that? 737 00:30:56,927 --> 00:30:57,927 No. 738 00:30:57,928 --> 00:30:59,895 Wh-Wh-Wh-Whoa. You have kids? 739 00:30:59,897 --> 00:31:01,129 Well, they're hers. 740 00:31:01,131 --> 00:31:02,431 She's a dancer. 741 00:31:02,433 --> 00:31:04,333 Uh, let me guess... A pole dancer? 742 00:31:04,335 --> 00:31:06,301 No, she's Japanese. 743 00:31:14,010 --> 00:31:16,111 Well, see you. 744 00:31:18,748 --> 00:31:20,816 All right, all right, we-we got to close these shades. 745 00:31:20,818 --> 00:31:23,085 Anybody on the beach will have a clear shot at us. 746 00:31:23,087 --> 00:31:24,253 Right. 747 00:31:24,255 --> 00:31:26,054 Do this... 748 00:31:29,192 --> 00:31:32,427 Man, it sucks to be you guys. 749 00:31:33,830 --> 00:31:35,597 ♪ Men. ♪ 750 00:31:35,599 --> 00:31:37,032 (phone ringing) 751 00:31:37,034 --> 00:31:38,500 Hello? 752 00:31:38,502 --> 00:31:39,868 Judith, it's me. 753 00:31:39,870 --> 00:31:41,136 Oh, hey, Alan. 754 00:31:41,138 --> 00:31:42,671 Isn't it wonderful about Jake? 755 00:31:42,673 --> 00:31:43,939 Uh, yeah, wonderful. Listen... 756 00:31:43,941 --> 00:31:45,707 Did he give you $100,000, too? 757 00:31:45,709 --> 00:31:47,309 He gave you $100,000? 758 00:31:47,311 --> 00:31:48,977 No. What do you want? 759 00:31:50,013 --> 00:31:51,847 Uh, uh, okay, long story short... 760 00:31:51,849 --> 00:31:54,950 It turns out my brother is alive and he's out for revenge. 761 00:31:54,952 --> 00:31:56,585 Revenge? For what? 762 00:31:56,587 --> 00:31:58,921 Well, he didn't think I could go on without him. 763 00:31:58,923 --> 00:32:00,255 He thought I was more of 764 00:32:00,257 --> 00:32:02,024 a supporting character in his life, 765 00:32:02,026 --> 00:32:04,526 but it turns out I-I was sort of a co-lead. 766 00:32:04,528 --> 00:32:07,396 Um, a-anyway, I just wanted you to know 767 00:32:07,398 --> 00:32:09,698 that if anything were to happen to me, 768 00:32:09,700 --> 00:32:11,700 you were the love of my life. 769 00:32:11,702 --> 00:32:13,835 Oh, Alan, that is so sweet. 770 00:32:13,837 --> 00:32:16,572 Hang on, honey. I'm getting another call. 771 00:32:25,915 --> 00:32:27,716 She's not coming back. 772 00:32:27,718 --> 00:32:29,484 ♪ Men. ♪ 773 00:32:29,486 --> 00:32:31,086 (phone ringing) 774 00:32:31,088 --> 00:32:32,421 Hello? 775 00:32:32,423 --> 00:32:33,889 Bridget, hi. 776 00:32:33,891 --> 00:32:35,324 It's Walden. 777 00:32:35,326 --> 00:32:37,225 Hey, Walden. What's up? 778 00:32:37,227 --> 00:32:40,028 I can't go into detail, but I just... 779 00:32:40,030 --> 00:32:43,231 I wanted to say that I wish I'd been a better husband. 780 00:32:43,233 --> 00:32:44,566 (chuckles softly) 781 00:32:44,568 --> 00:32:46,668 Well, thank you. 782 00:32:46,670 --> 00:32:49,137 And I just want to say that... 783 00:32:49,139 --> 00:32:51,039 I'm having sex with John Stamos. 784 00:32:53,610 --> 00:32:54,610 I'm not lying. 785 00:32:54,612 --> 00:32:56,478 (snaps fingers) 786 00:32:56,480 --> 00:32:58,680 Go for Stamos. 787 00:32:58,682 --> 00:33:00,882 Stamos, you're just a handsome guy 788 00:33:00,884 --> 00:33:02,918 who got lucky on a sitcom. 789 00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:05,387 Listen, um, I'm just gonna set the phone down 790 00:33:05,389 --> 00:33:07,923 so you can listen to me shish-kebab your old lady, okay? 791 00:33:07,925 --> 00:33:09,124 Bye-bye. 792 00:33:09,126 --> 00:33:11,126 ♪ Men. ♪ 793 00:33:11,128 --> 00:33:12,461 (photographers clamoring) 794 00:33:12,463 --> 00:33:15,297 (phone ringing) Hold on, fellas. 795 00:33:15,299 --> 00:33:17,099 Hello. 796 00:33:17,101 --> 00:33:18,600 Uh, Kandi, it's Alan. 797 00:33:18,602 --> 00:33:20,769 Oh, hi, Alan! 798 00:33:20,771 --> 00:33:22,337 I just wanted you to know that, 799 00:33:22,339 --> 00:33:24,473 even though we were only married for a short time, 800 00:33:24,475 --> 00:33:26,808 you were the love of my life. 801 00:33:26,810 --> 00:33:28,510 Oh, how sweet. 802 00:33:28,512 --> 00:33:31,947 And you were the first guy I had tushy sex with. 803 00:33:31,949 --> 00:33:33,949 You guys didn't hear that. 804 00:33:33,951 --> 00:33:35,083 ♪ Men. ♪ 805 00:33:35,085 --> 00:33:36,284 (phone ringing) 806 00:33:36,286 --> 00:33:37,519 Hello. 807 00:33:37,521 --> 00:33:38,954 Zoey. 808 00:33:38,956 --> 00:33:41,123 Hi. It's Walden. 809 00:33:41,125 --> 00:33:43,025 Oh, Walden. 810 00:33:43,027 --> 00:33:45,327 How are you, darling? 811 00:33:45,329 --> 00:33:47,162 Uh, not so good. 812 00:33:47,164 --> 00:33:49,031 Uh... that's why I'm calling. 813 00:33:49,033 --> 00:33:51,700 I... I just wanted to tell you that... 814 00:33:51,702 --> 00:33:54,436 I've been thinking about you lately, and... 815 00:33:54,438 --> 00:33:56,805 I'm sorry about the way things ended. 816 00:33:56,807 --> 00:33:59,708 Oh, well... water under the bridge. 817 00:33:59,710 --> 00:34:01,510 Listen, I'd love to chat, 818 00:34:01,512 --> 00:34:03,278 but I'm in the middle of a coronation. 819 00:34:06,516 --> 00:34:08,617 Of a what? 820 00:34:08,619 --> 00:34:10,185 A coronation. 821 00:34:10,187 --> 00:34:12,154 I married King Rupert of Moldavia, 822 00:34:12,156 --> 00:34:15,157 and I'm being crowned queen, so... 823 00:34:15,159 --> 00:34:18,160 You're the queen of Moldavia? 824 00:34:18,162 --> 00:34:19,728 What can I say? 825 00:34:19,730 --> 00:34:21,329 Thank you, JDate. 826 00:34:21,331 --> 00:34:23,565 (sighs) Shalom. 827 00:34:26,235 --> 00:34:28,437 Darling, you still breathing? 828 00:34:28,439 --> 00:34:30,072 ♪ Men. ♪ 829 00:34:30,074 --> 00:34:31,373 Hello? 830 00:34:31,375 --> 00:34:32,741 Lyndsey, it's Alan. 831 00:34:32,743 --> 00:34:33,942 Hi, Alan. 832 00:34:33,944 --> 00:34:35,243 I was just showing off 833 00:34:35,245 --> 00:34:36,885 the beautiful engagement ring you gave me. 834 00:34:39,182 --> 00:34:41,717 Great. Listen, I-I just wanted you to know 835 00:34:41,719 --> 00:34:44,186 that if anything were to happen to me, 836 00:34:44,188 --> 00:34:46,188 you were the love of my life. 837 00:34:46,190 --> 00:34:47,789 Oh, baby. 838 00:34:47,791 --> 00:34:49,825 You're the love of my life. 839 00:34:49,827 --> 00:34:51,093 (quietly): So, how much? 840 00:34:53,062 --> 00:34:54,863 ♪ Men. ♪ 841 00:34:54,865 --> 00:34:56,865 Okay, I will say it one more time. 842 00:34:56,867 --> 00:34:58,600 Resort hotel till the cops find him. 843 00:34:58,602 --> 00:35:00,802 We can be in Vegas in two hours. 844 00:35:00,804 --> 00:35:03,205 Styx is playing Mandalay Bay. 845 00:35:03,207 --> 00:35:05,540 No, if I let Charlie drive me out of this house, 846 00:35:05,542 --> 00:35:07,743 I reward his bad behavior. 847 00:35:07,745 --> 00:35:10,712 Yeah. That's only supposed to happen in show business. 848 00:35:10,714 --> 00:35:11,847 Which we are not in. 849 00:35:11,849 --> 00:35:15,383 Not anymore. 850 00:35:15,385 --> 00:35:17,652 (cell phone ringing) 851 00:35:17,654 --> 00:35:20,088 Oh. Hello? 852 00:35:20,090 --> 00:35:22,224 Valden? Walden. 853 00:35:22,226 --> 00:35:24,359 That's what I said. 854 00:35:24,361 --> 00:35:26,394 Look, I have good news. 855 00:35:26,396 --> 00:35:27,629 We found your boy. 856 00:35:27,631 --> 00:35:28,764 They found Charlie. 857 00:35:28,766 --> 00:35:30,065 Are-are they sure? 858 00:35:30,067 --> 00:35:31,967 Uh, uh, are... are you sure it's him? 859 00:35:31,969 --> 00:35:33,969 Well, he matches the description. 860 00:35:33,971 --> 00:35:36,271 Bowling shirt, cargo shorts, 861 00:35:36,273 --> 00:35:38,373 and he's babbling away incoherently. 862 00:35:39,408 --> 00:35:40,408 That sounds like him. 863 00:35:40,410 --> 00:35:41,410 Wh-Where'd you find him? 864 00:35:41,411 --> 00:35:42,711 In a trashed hotel room 865 00:35:42,713 --> 00:35:44,379 with a hooker in the closet. 866 00:35:44,381 --> 00:35:46,081 That's absolutely him. 867 00:35:46,083 --> 00:35:47,649 Oh, my... Thank you so much. 868 00:35:47,651 --> 00:35:49,417 This is a huge relief. 869 00:35:49,419 --> 00:35:50,685 Oh, you're welcome. 870 00:35:50,687 --> 00:35:52,053 Uh, see you in the gym. 871 00:35:52,055 --> 00:35:54,356 Okay. Hasta la vista. 872 00:35:54,358 --> 00:35:57,425 I'm telling you, I'm not Charlie Harper. 873 00:35:57,427 --> 00:35:58,660 Then who are you? 874 00:35:58,662 --> 00:36:00,862 My name is Christian Slater. 875 00:36:00,864 --> 00:36:02,731 I'm an actor, all right? 876 00:36:02,733 --> 00:36:05,200 I was in a bar, and this guy hands me a drink. 877 00:36:05,202 --> 00:36:07,469 Next thing I know, I wake up in a hotel room 878 00:36:07,471 --> 00:36:08,637 dressed like a 12-year-old, 879 00:36:08,639 --> 00:36:10,839 with a screaming woman in the closet. 880 00:36:10,841 --> 00:36:12,007 Yeah, right. 881 00:36:12,009 --> 00:36:13,742 And I'm the governor of California. 882 00:36:15,178 --> 00:36:17,479 That bitch stole my watch. 883 00:36:17,481 --> 00:36:19,881 ♪ Men. ♪ 884 00:36:27,352 --> 00:36:29,820 ♪ Men. ♪ 885 00:36:29,822 --> 00:36:31,455 What do you think Charlie will do 886 00:36:31,457 --> 00:36:32,856 when he gets out of jail? 887 00:36:32,858 --> 00:36:35,759 Well, if the past is any indication, 888 00:36:35,761 --> 00:36:39,463 he'll sober up and reflect on his past mistakes, 889 00:36:39,465 --> 00:36:41,098 apologize to everyone, 890 00:36:41,100 --> 00:36:43,000 and then do something even worse. 891 00:36:44,769 --> 00:36:46,637 See, I'm not so pessimistic. 892 00:36:46,639 --> 00:36:48,905 I'm hoping someday he and I can be buddies. 893 00:36:52,010 --> 00:36:54,011 (all laughing) 894 00:36:55,513 --> 00:36:58,148 Good one. 895 00:36:58,150 --> 00:36:59,483 By the way, 896 00:36:59,485 --> 00:37:01,885 when this cigar is done, so am I. 897 00:37:01,887 --> 00:37:03,620 Yeah, you calling it a day? 898 00:37:03,622 --> 00:37:05,355 Calling it a career. 899 00:37:05,357 --> 00:37:06,456 You're quitting? 900 00:37:06,458 --> 00:37:08,458 I didn't want to rub your nose in it, 901 00:37:08,460 --> 00:37:10,394 but Charlie sent me a big-ass check, 902 00:37:10,396 --> 00:37:11,862 so I'm out of here. 903 00:37:11,864 --> 00:37:13,196 Where you gonna go? 904 00:37:13,198 --> 00:37:14,498 Don't know. 905 00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:16,133 Somewhere the sun is bright, 906 00:37:16,135 --> 00:37:19,202 the pot is strong and the men are stupid. 907 00:37:20,338 --> 00:37:21,872 That's here. 908 00:37:24,242 --> 00:37:25,942 You're right. 909 00:37:25,944 --> 00:37:27,511 I'm staying. 910 00:37:29,380 --> 00:37:30,747 (helicopter whirring overhead) 911 00:37:30,749 --> 00:37:31,915 Wow. 912 00:37:31,917 --> 00:37:33,717 Look at that. 913 00:37:36,954 --> 00:37:39,856 Someone's having a piano delivered by helicopter. 914 00:37:39,858 --> 00:37:42,025 Mmm. That's the kind of extravagant thing 915 00:37:42,027 --> 00:37:43,593 Charlie would do. 916 00:37:43,595 --> 00:37:46,129 Oh, uh, he had a baby grand just like that. 917 00:37:46,131 --> 00:37:47,731 It's coming right this way. 918 00:37:49,434 --> 00:37:51,968 You don't think that it's possible 919 00:37:51,970 --> 00:37:54,638 that the cops got the wrong guy, do you? 920 00:37:56,541 --> 00:37:58,575 Nah. - Nah. 921 00:38:06,184 --> 00:38:07,584 (rings doorbell) 922 00:38:07,586 --> 00:38:09,086 (helicopter whirring overhead) 923 00:38:19,999 --> 00:38:21,733 Winning. 924 00:38:33,980 --> 00:38:40,300 Sync, corrected by elderman @elder_man63660

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