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Join Telegram: @lubokvideo - https://t.me/lubokvideo
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00:00:44,628 --> 00:00:47,463
Hey, guys, what's up?
Kurt here from Kurt's World.
2
00:00:47,464 --> 00:00:49,340
Hey, guys, how's it going?
It's Kurt from Kurt's World.
3
00:00:49,341 --> 00:00:51,342
Hey, guys, how's it going?
Kurt from Kurt's World here.
4
00:00:51,343 --> 00:00:53,636
Hey, what's up, guys?
Kurt here from Kurt's World.
5
00:00:53,637 --> 00:00:55,805
Hi, everybody. This is
Kurt from Kurt's World.
6
00:00:55,806 --> 00:00:58,516
And today I'm
going to draw my life.
7
00:00:58,517 --> 00:01:00,643
Something in these videos
that I really appreciate
8
00:01:00,644 --> 00:01:04,230
is everybody's complete
honesty in telling their life story.
9
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:06,691
And where does
this story take place?
10
00:01:06,692 --> 00:01:09,110
Los Angeles... That's
where I was born,
11
00:01:09,111 --> 00:01:12,405
although shortly after, my
parents had to move out to Azusa
12
00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,407
'cause it's just a little
bit more affordable
13
00:01:14,408 --> 00:01:16,326
and better for raising a family.
14
00:01:19,830 --> 00:01:21,163
Hey, Dozier.
15
00:01:21,164 --> 00:01:24,585
Mom's gone, so I'm in charge.
16
00:01:25,669 --> 00:01:27,420
I remember it like
it was yesterday,
17
00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:29,839
and we watched the planes
crash into the buildings
18
00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:31,090
millions of times.
19
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,675
People jumping
out of the windows,
20
00:01:32,676 --> 00:01:34,594
running around,
the dust, the fire.
21
00:01:34,595 --> 00:01:36,721
And even though I didn't fully
understand everything back then,
22
00:01:36,722 --> 00:01:39,682
I knew that no one could
ever forget an event like that,
23
00:01:39,683 --> 00:01:40,975
real or fake.
24
00:01:40,976 --> 00:01:43,311
[ Up-tempo music playing ]
25
00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:46,480
Hey, what's up guys?
It's Kurt from Kurt's World.
26
00:01:46,481 --> 00:01:48,858
I'm here with my dad.
We're in the studio.
27
00:01:48,859 --> 00:01:51,944
Working on this dope
new track for Bezar.
28
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,404
- KURT: Really?
- Yeah yeah.
29
00:01:53,405 --> 00:01:55,699
KURT: Well, check...
Yeah check this out, though.
30
00:01:57,034 --> 00:01:59,869
Kurt's World. Dad,
seriously put the hat on.
31
00:01:59,870 --> 00:02:01,912
Alright. [ Groans ]
32
00:02:01,913 --> 00:02:03,497
There you go.
33
00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:05,207
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
34
00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:07,543
After the divorce,
Mom was really upset,
35
00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:10,671
so I decided to stay home
with her and be a good son.
36
00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:12,048
And I don't know
how it happened,
37
00:02:12,049 --> 00:02:13,549
but one thing led to another,
38
00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:15,926
and I started really
getting into online gaming.
39
00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:18,429
I'm gonna fuck you h... so...
40
00:02:18,430 --> 00:02:20,765
I'm gonna fuck you so hard.
41
00:02:20,766 --> 00:02:23,726
In 2009, I officially
started Kurt's World,
42
00:02:23,727 --> 00:02:25,519
kicking off the empire
you know today.
43
00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:26,729
That's pretty cool huh?
44
00:02:26,730 --> 00:02:28,314
This is a program
where I've made all
45
00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:30,775
of some of the
most influential beats
46
00:02:30,776 --> 00:02:31,984
and some of my top beats.
47
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,070
Control-shift.
48
00:02:34,071 --> 00:02:35,905
That's my favorite shortcut.
49
00:02:35,906 --> 00:02:37,239
Life hacks, reviews,
50
00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,532
and all the little
things in between
51
00:02:38,533 --> 00:02:40,618
that make life really
cool and so much fun.
52
00:02:40,619 --> 00:02:42,495
That's where all
the magic happens.
53
00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:44,915
[ Chuckles ] Just kidding. Um...
54
00:02:48,043 --> 00:02:51,170
What I like about these
right off the bat is that...
55
00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:52,838
Is how they seem.
56
00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:57,051
[ Coughs ] The mouthfeel
on this... otherworldly.
57
00:02:57,052 --> 00:02:59,053
And that's also when
I started babysitting.
58
00:02:59,054 --> 00:03:01,263
You know, 'cause it's
important to stay current.
59
00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:03,516
Those kids were a great
source for new content.
60
00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:05,685
And I'm still friends
with most of them today.
61
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:08,521
Shout-out to my friend Bobby
Bud Lee @BobbyBaseCamp.
62
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:09,689
You tell them, Bobby.
63
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:12,108
Oh, fuck you,
fuck you, fuck you.
64
00:03:12,109 --> 00:03:13,609
God fucking damn it!
65
00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:15,236
What's up, guys?
Here from Kurt's World.
66
00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:16,278
- What's up?
- Oh, my fucking God.
67
00:03:16,279 --> 00:03:17,446
Here with BobbyBaseCamp.
68
00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:18,906
- Fuck! I just died.
- What's up?
69
00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:21,367
Kurt, do not fucking
double-dip my stream.
70
00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:22,410
- Okay?
- Sorry.
71
00:03:22,411 --> 00:03:23,953
These values have followed me
72
00:03:23,954 --> 00:03:26,580
all the way to my new
job, a Spree driver.
73
00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:28,040
And the cool thing about Spree
74
00:03:28,041 --> 00:03:30,960
is that you're interacting
with people all the time.
75
00:03:30,961 --> 00:03:34,004
It's amazing for content
and for just in general.
76
00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:37,842
Wow, that is an old
Smart & Final right there.
77
00:03:37,843 --> 00:03:41,804
But it's not always easy making
great content day after day.
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00:03:41,805 --> 00:03:45,182
Sometimes it's just you,
yourself, and your brain.
79
00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:47,310
And that can be frustrating.
80
00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:51,440
[ Traffic passing ]
81
00:04:01,992 --> 00:04:04,326
I haven't made a
video in a long time
82
00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:07,621
because it's... things aren't
really awesome for me right now.
83
00:04:07,622 --> 00:04:10,332
And it's been kind of
hard for me to find Kurt.
84
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:11,625
Especially in these videos,
85
00:04:11,626 --> 00:04:13,628
it's been really
tough for me to find...
86
00:04:15,255 --> 00:04:18,216
It's been really tough for
me to find Kurt, and I'm just...
87
00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:21,762
It's been really tough
for me to find Kurt...
88
00:04:22,554 --> 00:04:25,515
I don't even know why
I'm making these videos.
89
00:04:26,349 --> 00:04:27,892
Metrics.
90
00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:31,605
It is a numbers
game, and right now...
91
00:04:33,023 --> 00:04:34,775
I just feel like a zero.
92
00:04:37,319 --> 00:04:40,821
But that's usually when you come
up with your best breakthroughs.
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I know I did.
94
00:04:41,616 --> 00:04:42,616
Yo, guys, what's going on?
95
00:04:42,617 --> 00:04:43,866
It's me, Kurt from Kurt's World,
96
00:04:43,867 --> 00:04:45,534
and I just realized
something big.
97
00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:47,203
And I'm calling it "The Lesson."
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00:04:47,204 --> 00:04:50,498
This is a surefire way for me
to go viral, and guess what.
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00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:52,541
The best part
being I can do it all
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00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:54,627
from the front seat of my Spree.
101
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:56,378
So you guys stayed
tuned, buckle up,
102
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:57,797
and I'll show you the ropes.
103
00:04:57,798 --> 00:04:59,465
Alright? Peace out.
Much love, you guys.
104
00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:00,758
#PeaceOut.
105
00:05:00,759 --> 00:05:02,885
Peace out. Peace out.
106
00:05:02,886 --> 00:05:05,387
Make sure to follow...
Follow me for "The Lesson."
107
00:05:05,388 --> 00:05:06,640
Peace out.
108
00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:15,982
[ Click ]
109
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[ Squeaking ]
110
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Hey, guys, how's it going?
It's Kurt from Kurt's World.
111
00:05:41,132 --> 00:05:43,343
And welcome to "The Lesson."
112
00:05:45,887 --> 00:05:49,265
For all of you out there who
don't know me, get ready,
113
00:05:49,266 --> 00:05:50,933
'cause you're about to know me.
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I'm Kurt.
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[ Drill whirring ]
116
00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,984
Step one...
Organizing your bottles.
117
00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:01,861
If you check out the video
that I uploaded last week
118
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,571
on Kurt's World, you're
already gonna know
119
00:06:03,572 --> 00:06:05,447
how to prepare
them before your ride.
120
00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:06,699
You've got to remember, guys,
121
00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,200
what we're doing
here is important.
122
00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:10,244
You're creating a brand.
123
00:06:10,245 --> 00:06:12,079
Actually, hold up.
124
00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:18,794
Real step one... Get...
your... rig... together.
125
00:06:18,795 --> 00:06:21,714
If you're not documenting
yourself, it's simple.
126
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:22,923
You just don't exist.
127
00:06:22,924 --> 00:06:24,800
And for my premium subscribers,
128
00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:27,303
if you hop on to Kurt's World,
you can choose your own angles.
129
00:06:27,304 --> 00:06:30,014
Plus, I'll be screen-sharing
my phone all night
130
00:06:30,015 --> 00:06:32,224
for unlimited
behind-the-scenes access.
131
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:34,268
So don't sleep on that.
132
00:06:34,269 --> 00:06:36,812
[ Horn blares ]
133
00:06:36,813 --> 00:06:39,690
Okay, guys, well, I
guess... I guess that's it.
134
00:06:39,691 --> 00:06:41,317
I hope you guys
enjoyed this live stream,
135
00:06:41,318 --> 00:06:44,194
and make sure to share and
comment on all your socials
136
00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:45,821
using the hashtag #TheLesson.
137
00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:48,908
- Thanks, Kurt.
- Shit, I almost forgot.
138
00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:50,118
Mom.
139
00:06:51,870 --> 00:06:53,413
Hey, Mom.
140
00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:21,357
[ Beeping ]
141
00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:22,692
Let's go!
142
00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:27,196
I know that we all
have our issues.
143
00:07:27,197 --> 00:07:29,698
So let me just say this.
144
00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:32,284
There's a trigger
warning in place.
145
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:34,078
I'm not gonna be
offended if you can't watch.
146
00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:38,666
But, yeah, for all my
real ones out there,
147
00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:42,045
uh, it's time to go viral, baby.
148
00:07:46,883 --> 00:07:51,470
Okay, guys, so we're here
at the first passenger's house.
149
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:56,184
Uh, here to pick up Frederick.
150
00:07:58,561 --> 00:08:00,897
And here he comes.
151
00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:08,112
Alright, guys, now, the record
for a rideshare driver is six.
152
00:08:08,113 --> 00:08:10,739
So you're gonna want
to at least top that number
153
00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:13,743
if you want to hit it big-time.
154
00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:16,578
- Frederick.
- That's me.
155
00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:18,747
KURT: Hey. I'm Kurt,
your Spree driver.
156
00:08:18,748 --> 00:08:21,208
And you're going to
Grand Castle Banquet Hall.
157
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:23,252
- Highland Park, right?
- You got it, brother.
158
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:24,253
Let's go.
159
00:08:24,254 --> 00:08:27,007
[ Cellphone clicking ]
160
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:33,387
Uh...
161
00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:35,305
Hey?
162
00:08:35,306 --> 00:08:36,598
KURT: What's up, dude?
163
00:08:36,599 --> 00:08:38,600
What's, uh, going on here?
164
00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:40,102
What?
165
00:08:40,103 --> 00:08:42,104
Lot of fucking cameras
in here, brother.
166
00:08:42,105 --> 00:08:43,814
Oh, yeah, right.
167
00:08:43,815 --> 00:08:46,567
Hey, guys. Hope that's okay.
168
00:08:46,568 --> 00:08:49,112
And what if I say it isn't?
169
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:52,197
It's for my protection.
170
00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:54,743
Oh, right, got you.
171
00:08:57,787 --> 00:09:00,164
Oh, there's some water
back there if you want some.
172
00:09:00,165 --> 00:09:01,791
I'm good.
173
00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,877
Got a charger, though?
174
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,671
You bet.
175
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,257
ABC. [ Chuckles ]
176
00:09:10,258 --> 00:09:12,301
- Always be charging.
- FREDERICK: Uh-huh.
177
00:09:12,302 --> 00:09:14,470
Well, I've been working
on a speech all day,
178
00:09:14,471 --> 00:09:15,888
so this sucker's drained.
179
00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:17,723
A speech? Big event?
180
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:19,183
About 3,000 people.
181
00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:21,769
3,000 people? That's
a lot of eyeballs on you.
182
00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:24,146
Yeah. Lot of people
are excited, so...
183
00:09:24,147 --> 00:09:26,523
Actually, you want
to tell my followers
184
00:09:26,524 --> 00:09:27,649
how you greet your audience?
185
00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:28,984
That would be great.
186
00:09:28,985 --> 00:09:30,903
FREDERICK: What do
you mean your followers?
187
00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:33,573
Right, yeah, no, I'm actually
just recording a tutorial.
188
00:09:34,157 --> 00:09:36,450
That's cool. About what?
189
00:09:36,451 --> 00:09:39,369
Oh, I'm giving people tips
on how to, like, you know,
190
00:09:39,370 --> 00:09:40,496
up their social-media game.
191
00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:41,997
- LMFAO.
- Very cool.
192
00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:43,999
- While you're driving, huh?
- Yeah, yeah.
193
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:45,542
FREDERICK: It's
good to see men like us
194
00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:48,670
trying to master this, you
know, social-media stuff.
195
00:09:48,671 --> 00:09:49,713
We're gonna need it.
196
00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:51,465
KURT: Yeah.
197
00:09:51,466 --> 00:09:53,133
What do you mean men like us?
198
00:09:53,134 --> 00:09:55,302
White men.
199
00:09:55,303 --> 00:09:56,888
You are white, aren't you?
200
00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:00,349
Yeah.
201
00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:01,683
Yeah, you are.
202
00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:03,936
It's good. Say it with me.
203
00:10:03,937 --> 00:10:06,230
I'm white and I'm proud.
204
00:10:06,231 --> 00:10:08,690
Uh... no.
205
00:10:08,691 --> 00:10:11,276
[ Chuckles ] Wait,
are you Jewish?
206
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:14,863
Whites, blacks, Asians,
Latinos, we're all the same.
207
00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:16,657
[ Laughing ] Okay.
208
00:10:16,658 --> 00:10:18,283
Have you read the IQ studies?
209
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,953
Do you know what's going
on in Chicago right now?
210
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:24,748
Bobby, don't
worry. It's all good.
211
00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:26,208
FREDERICK: [
Laughing ] Who's Bobby?
212
00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:29,670
Your gender-queer, uh, partner?
213
00:10:29,671 --> 00:10:31,923
It's actually Bobby Bud Lee.
214
00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:36,718
@BobbyBaseCamp. You
don't know Bobby Bud Lee?
215
00:10:36,719 --> 00:10:39,388
What's up, guys? I'm out
here on my influencer bullshit.
216
00:10:39,389 --> 00:10:40,931
I'm on the... I'm
on the hover board.
217
00:10:40,932 --> 00:10:42,307
Look at this place. It's crazy.
218
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,560
So you all know what
happens when I get bored.
219
00:10:44,561 --> 00:10:47,187
And... secured. You got got.
220
00:10:47,188 --> 00:10:48,564
Just regarding, like, the party
221
00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:49,898
that went down in
my pad last night,
222
00:10:49,899 --> 00:10:51,483
that girl who got
thrown off the balcony
223
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,527
and hit her ankle on
the pool, not my fault.
224
00:10:53,528 --> 00:10:55,529
That dude who threw her off
clearly wasn't strong enough.
225
00:10:55,530 --> 00:10:59,074
What's up, BaseCamp?
Today we are feeling grateful.
226
00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:01,326
I'm in my home fucking
theater right now, BaseCamp.
227
00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:03,412
And that is all
thanks to you guys.
228
00:11:03,413 --> 00:11:04,746
Actually, can I borrow it?
229
00:11:04,747 --> 00:11:05,914
I actually really need
to use it for something.
230
00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:07,416
Yeah, dude, what's up? Fucker!
231
00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:08,959
He give it back to me, dude.
232
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:11,420
Phone King! Hey, I'm
zooming out of here.
233
00:11:11,421 --> 00:11:12,921
Okay, well, he's huge,
234
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,506
and he's promoting my
stream on his channel tonight.
235
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:15,924
But he might not do it if
there's too much racist shit
236
00:11:15,925 --> 00:11:18,302
- on here, so...
- You mean authentic shit?
237
00:11:18,303 --> 00:11:22,431
Yo, everyone, being
racist is not cool.
238
00:11:22,432 --> 00:11:24,057
Alright? It's toxic.
239
00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:25,767
Like Bobby, he's authentic.
240
00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:27,519
And he gets free
hotel rooms and swag,
241
00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:29,938
so take a page out of his book.
242
00:11:29,939 --> 00:11:33,066
[ Chuckles ] Thanks
for the tip, snowflake.
243
00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:36,696
Oh, Jesus Christ. A
lot of fucking stop signs.
244
00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:38,697
Hey, I don't see
any cops around.
245
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,073
Should I blow this next one?
246
00:11:40,074 --> 00:11:41,366
FREDERICK: You're
gonna run the stop sign?
247
00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:42,951
- [ Laughing ]
- [ Horn honks ]
248
00:11:42,952 --> 00:11:44,620
- Oh, shit!
- [ Tires screeching ]
249
00:11:44,621 --> 00:11:47,080
Fucking A, dude. You're crazy.
250
00:11:47,081 --> 00:11:49,666
Just trying to spice
things up for my fans.
251
00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:52,712
Right, right. Wow.
252
00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:55,756
KURT: Remember, there's
water back there if you need it.
253
00:11:55,757 --> 00:11:58,425
Yeah, alright. I
am a little parched.
254
00:11:58,426 --> 00:12:01,094
Yeah, you know,
for your big speech.
255
00:12:01,095 --> 00:12:04,223
Yeah. You know,
you're okay for a libtard.
256
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:06,433
Thanks.
257
00:12:06,434 --> 00:12:08,228
You just need to wake up.
258
00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:12,940
- [ Coughs ]
- [ Beep, radio plays ]
259
00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:14,816
I'm really trying to get
ready for my speech.
260
00:12:14,817 --> 00:12:16,276
Do you mind?
261
00:12:16,277 --> 00:12:17,986
KURT: Hey, are there a lot
of members in your group?
262
00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:19,696
Yeah. How far away are we?
263
00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:22,324
Hey, you should let them know
that you're not gonna make it.
264
00:12:22,325 --> 00:12:24,868
[ Coughs ]
265
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:26,162
What?
266
00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:29,665
Does this water
have, like, a taste to it?
267
00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:31,166
Am I crazy? [ Coughing ]
268
00:12:31,167 --> 00:12:34,169
What are you talking
about? It's just pure water.
269
00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:35,420
Just gonna want to make sure
270
00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:37,172
that you remove
all the air bubbles.
271
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:39,049
Not really. I just
like to do that.
272
00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:41,301
And then we're gonna
inject this right on the label,
273
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:44,596
because that way the
passenger will never notice.
274
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:45,974
[ Coughing ]
275
00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:50,018
Simple as that.
276
00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:51,270
Take your glue gun.
277
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:52,604
It's been heating
up for a second.
278
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,898
And all you got to
do, just a little tap.
279
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,859
[ Coughing ]
280
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:00,946
[ Blowing ]
281
00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:03,032
[ Coughing continues ]
282
00:13:03,658 --> 00:13:04,825
Airtight.
283
00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:06,159
Well, watertight.
284
00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:07,996
[ Frederick coughs, gasps ]
285
00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:25,554
It's perfect.
286
00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:27,180
Check this out.
287
00:13:27,181 --> 00:13:29,225
I've already got a bunch done.
288
00:13:31,978 --> 00:13:34,313
One down, lots more to go.
289
00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:38,817
Okay, next we are
picking up Andrea.
290
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,569
[ Cellphone chimes ]
291
00:13:40,570 --> 00:13:44,197
Yeah, okay, Bobby, sure.
Yeah, that's fake news.
292
00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:46,616
That's actually a pretty
good point, though, guys.
293
00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:47,993
No one should be able to tell
294
00:13:47,994 --> 00:13:50,245
what you're doing
is real at first.
295
00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:52,998
Because you want to get
as many done undetected
296
00:13:52,999 --> 00:13:55,334
for maximum
attention down the road.
297
00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:57,336
#TheLesson.
298
00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:58,837
Legacy.
299
00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:00,547
Okay, here we go.
300
00:14:00,548 --> 00:14:04,760
She should be right here.
301
00:14:04,761 --> 00:14:08,138
Is Andrea with her friends?
302
00:14:08,139 --> 00:14:11,683
Oh, looks like Andrea is alone.
303
00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:12,934
I like that, though, you know.
304
00:14:12,935 --> 00:14:14,936
One-on-one, get
to know the person.
305
00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:16,939
Slice of life.
306
00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:21,109
Oh, you know, guys,
technically that's litter,
307
00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:24,654
but I think she'll get
away with this one.
308
00:14:24,655 --> 00:14:26,656
Tell him to fuck off.
309
00:14:26,657 --> 00:14:28,784
[ Knock on window ]
310
00:14:28,785 --> 00:14:31,787
- KURT: It's open.
- Yeah, maybe.
311
00:14:31,788 --> 00:14:33,205
I'll see what she says.
312
00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:35,165
KURT: Hey, Andrea.
313
00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:36,958
- ANDREA: Yeah.
- KURT: Oh.
314
00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:39,002
ANDREA: No, no, no, no.
315
00:14:39,003 --> 00:14:41,756
We got some good
nibbles. We did. Mm-hmm.
316
00:14:42,590 --> 00:14:45,342
[ Sighs ] I'm going
to Lincoln Heights.
317
00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:46,968
Yeah, there was this
one investment property
318
00:14:46,969 --> 00:14:49,262
you would cream your jeans over.
319
00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:52,307
Oh, I got these cameras
set up. Hope that's okay.
320
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:55,727
No, I think the cactuses
are creating the perfect vibe.
321
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,647
Yeah, it's like that cheesy
L.A. thing that we talked about.
322
00:14:58,648 --> 00:15:01,024
On to the next
future yoga studio.
323
00:15:01,025 --> 00:15:04,820
No. Obviously I would never
actually say that to a client.
324
00:15:04,821 --> 00:15:08,407
Michael, I'm so tired of
you second-guessing me.
325
00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:12,035
Well, I don't see you out
here fucking doing this.
326
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:13,454
[ Sighs ]
327
00:15:14,664 --> 00:15:17,874
- Yeah. Look, I am in my Spree.
- [ Beep, radio plays ]
328
00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:20,502
I am going to be on the
red-eye in a few hours.
329
00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:23,214
Let's just figure this out
when we see each other.
330
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:26,508
Yeah, okay.
331
00:15:26,509 --> 00:15:28,010
Yeah.
332
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:41,566
[ Chuckles ]
333
00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:44,235
[ Cellphone ringing ]
334
00:15:46,237 --> 00:15:48,196
- What's up, beat master?
- I can't... I cannot ta...
335
00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:51,241
- I can't talk right now. Bye.
- Wait, wait, wait.
336
00:15:51,242 --> 00:15:53,453
[ Cellphone ringing ]
337
00:15:54,704 --> 00:15:56,246
- Stop.
- [ Dog barking ]
338
00:15:56,247 --> 00:15:58,039
- Don't hang up on me, dick.
- I cannot talk right now.
339
00:15:58,040 --> 00:15:59,458
- I can't talk right now.
- I need a ride!
340
00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:00,710
Bye. Bye.
341
00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:16,057
Okay, guys, okay.
342
00:16:16,058 --> 00:16:17,392
Just like the last guy,
343
00:16:17,393 --> 00:16:18,768
we're gonna want
to get in their phone,
344
00:16:18,769 --> 00:16:20,187
but it's not always...
345
00:16:20,188 --> 00:16:21,521
Looks like this
is a newer phone,
346
00:16:21,522 --> 00:16:23,023
so you can't always
use the thumb.
347
00:16:23,024 --> 00:16:27,320
Sometimes you
have to use their face.
348
00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,241
Usually takes a couple tries.
349
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,869
[ Cellphone clicks ]
350
00:16:35,870 --> 00:16:37,287
Yes, got it.
351
00:16:37,288 --> 00:16:39,706
First open your Spree app.
352
00:16:39,707 --> 00:16:42,376
Perfect. Rate your driver.
353
00:16:43,294 --> 00:16:45,212
Five stars, I think.
354
00:16:45,213 --> 00:16:47,756
And here it just
asks you for a tip.
355
00:16:47,757 --> 00:16:50,425
Usually I do something
kind of in the middle.
356
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:53,094
So I'll leave $2. Submit.
357
00:16:53,095 --> 00:16:55,597
Next to tie up loose ends.
358
00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:58,934
Michael says, "Sorry.
Can't wait to see you later."
359
00:16:58,935 --> 00:17:00,727
What shall we tell Michael?
360
00:17:00,728 --> 00:17:01,937
Uh...
361
00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:04,022
"Fuck off.
362
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:07,192
Canceling my red-eye.
363
00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:13,865
No one even reposts
your stuff anymore."
364
00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:15,659
Send. Perfect.
365
00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:16,952
Alright, you guys,
366
00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:18,411
you're not gonna have to
worry about things like this
367
00:17:18,412 --> 00:17:19,913
when it comes
to the final stretch.
368
00:17:19,914 --> 00:17:23,459
But for now, it really
helps to fend off suspicion.
369
00:17:26,254 --> 00:17:28,673
[ Electronic music plays ]
370
00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:34,679
[ Beep ]
371
00:17:35,972 --> 00:17:39,225
[ Up-tempo music plays ]
372
00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:52,780
Hey, man, you like this music?
373
00:17:54,991 --> 00:17:56,409
It works.
374
00:17:58,077 --> 00:18:00,162
Slaps, man.
375
00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:04,166
I made this beat.
376
00:18:06,002 --> 00:18:07,669
This is my soundtrack.
377
00:18:07,670 --> 00:18:11,339
Why does rush hour start at
2:00 p.m. in this fucking city?
378
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:12,674
You know, it just
depends. Where we are...
379
00:18:12,675 --> 00:18:16,428
Stop. I don't want your opinion.
380
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,346
- Well, you just ask... you...
- Stop.
381
00:18:18,347 --> 00:18:21,600
I'm just fucking saying. I
got to be somewhere ASAP.
382
00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:25,312
Okay, so, like, fix it
or shut the fuck up.
383
00:18:25,313 --> 00:18:27,815
[ Horn honks ]
384
00:18:32,153 --> 00:18:34,697
[ Beep ]
385
00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:41,870
Where... Where the
fuck are you going, dude?
386
00:18:41,871 --> 00:18:44,247
Wait, you just...
You passed our exit.
387
00:18:44,248 --> 00:18:45,790
We're going to pick
up another passenger.
388
00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:47,667
MARIO: Dude, this is
already taking forever.
389
00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:48,668
Are you serious?
390
00:18:48,669 --> 00:18:49,919
Well, I'm sorry.
391
00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:51,296
You requested SpreeSocial.
392
00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:55,634
I have a female
waiting for me, you incel.
393
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:59,554
Well, there is a female
waiting for me to pick her up.
394
00:18:59,555 --> 00:19:01,389
And her name is Jessie.
395
00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:03,058
Okay? This is SpreeSocial.
396
00:19:03,059 --> 00:19:04,851
This is what you signed up for.
397
00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:06,394
MARIO: You gonna drive around
398
00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:07,729
this fucking parking
lot for five minutes?
399
00:19:07,730 --> 00:19:08,897
Where is she?
400
00:19:08,898 --> 00:19:10,190
Got her.
401
00:19:10,191 --> 00:19:13,526
Oh, shit. Okay.
Here we fucking go.
402
00:19:13,527 --> 00:19:15,905
KURT: Jessie. Jessie.
403
00:19:16,864 --> 00:19:18,198
Hey, Jessie.
404
00:19:18,199 --> 00:19:20,325
- Yeah?
- I'm your Spree driver, Kurt.
405
00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:22,243
- Yo, what up, girl?
- No, thanks.
406
00:19:22,244 --> 00:19:23,578
KURT: What?
407
00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:25,163
MARIO: Fuck. Dude,
don't be such a bitch.
408
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:26,998
Get her in here.
409
00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:28,208
Go. She's getting away.
410
00:19:28,209 --> 00:19:29,417
- Go, go, go.
- Okay.
411
00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:30,698
MARIO: Careful,
careful, careful.
412
00:19:33,923 --> 00:19:35,548
- [ Horn honks ]
- KURT: Jessie, Jessie.
413
00:19:35,549 --> 00:19:37,050
Hey. Hey, listen
414
00:19:37,051 --> 00:19:39,094
- I'm a five-star-rated driver.
- I already canceled.
415
00:19:39,095 --> 00:19:40,887
Listen, I can see where
you're going on the map,
416
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,430
and it's just right
around the bend.
417
00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:45,266
Just get in the car.
This ride could be on me.
418
00:19:45,267 --> 00:19:47,060
But I canceled, so
is that gonna, like...
419
00:19:47,061 --> 00:19:48,478
Oh, that's okay. I don't mind.
420
00:19:48,479 --> 00:19:50,397
I don't do this just for money.
421
00:19:50,398 --> 00:19:51,773
JESSIE: Uh, okay.
422
00:19:51,774 --> 00:19:53,776
Yeah. It's okay. Get in.
423
00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:55,945
Hey.
424
00:19:59,365 --> 00:20:01,116
Knocked my camera off.
425
00:20:01,117 --> 00:20:02,784
Hope you guys like music.
426
00:20:02,785 --> 00:20:04,494
- [ Dance music plays ]
- Oh, my God.
427
00:20:04,495 --> 00:20:06,831
- Oh.
- You a fan of music?
428
00:20:13,462 --> 00:20:15,922
What body part did you just hit?
429
00:20:15,923 --> 00:20:18,884
- What?
- What... What...
430
00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:22,304
Dude, can you turn
off the shitty music?
431
00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:25,849
- [ Volume decreases ]
- Fully, fully off.
432
00:20:25,850 --> 00:20:27,684
- Oh, yeah, totally.
- [ Music stops ]
433
00:20:27,685 --> 00:20:30,520
But you were just telling me
how much you like it, though.
434
00:20:30,521 --> 00:20:32,647
Yeah, no, I wasn't.
[ Chuckles ] Um...
435
00:20:32,648 --> 00:20:34,357
So, Jessie, I
already told him this,
436
00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:37,986
but I got these cameras in
here set up for everyone's safety.
437
00:20:37,987 --> 00:20:39,487
Full disclosure, FYI,
438
00:20:39,488 --> 00:20:42,824
I'm totally and
completely transparent.
439
00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:45,744
Yeah, watch out for him.
He's a fucking psycho.
440
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,620
But like I was saying,
my name is Mario,
441
00:20:47,621 --> 00:20:51,249
and, uh, you must be Jessie.
442
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,168
He has ears.
443
00:20:53,169 --> 00:20:55,336
And eyes. And... And three legs.
444
00:20:55,337 --> 00:20:58,256
JESSIE: Wouldn't be
surprised if you had rabies, too.
445
00:20:58,257 --> 00:21:00,592
Wait, hold up,
hold up. I know you.
446
00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:02,135
- No, you don't.
- Yes, I do.
447
00:21:02,136 --> 00:21:05,263
Hey, "Mar-io" or "Mare-io"
or whatever your name is,
448
00:21:05,264 --> 00:21:07,348
just grab a water and chill out.
449
00:21:07,349 --> 00:21:09,017
Shut the fuck up.
Yo, she's a comedian.
450
00:21:09,018 --> 00:21:10,518
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah.
451
00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:13,605
No, you do the, uh, "Hey,
everybody look at me."
452
00:21:13,606 --> 00:21:15,398
It's, "All eyes on me."
453
00:21:15,399 --> 00:21:16,858
I fucking knew it.
454
00:21:16,859 --> 00:21:19,861
Yeah, yeah, you're
like, "All eyes on me.
455
00:21:19,862 --> 00:21:22,697
"All eyes on me. I
said all eyes on"...
456
00:21:22,698 --> 00:21:24,032
- I fucking knew it.
- KURT: Wait, wait, wait.
457
00:21:24,033 --> 00:21:25,492
Hold on. You're famous?
458
00:21:25,493 --> 00:21:26,868
No, I'm not famous.
459
00:21:26,869 --> 00:21:28,536
If I was, I wouldn't
be taking SpreeSocial.
460
00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:29,996
No, dude, she's got
a mega following.
461
00:21:29,997 --> 00:21:31,664
- She's legit, man.
- Wait, wait a second.
462
00:21:31,665 --> 00:21:33,583
- You have a huge following?
- MARIO: Yeah, dude.
463
00:21:33,584 --> 00:21:35,710
That's amazing. How did
you grow your audience?
464
00:21:35,711 --> 00:21:39,214
Um... I'm, like, funny.
465
00:21:39,215 --> 00:21:41,257
Oh, my gosh. Yeah.
466
00:21:41,258 --> 00:21:42,884
I mean, having
a big following...
467
00:21:42,885 --> 00:21:46,679
I can... I mean, yeah, all
those notifications coming in.
468
00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:48,723
I mean, I get it. I do, too.
469
00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:51,059
So, Jessie, it's super
nice to meet you.
470
00:21:51,060 --> 00:21:53,478
Follow for follow, and if you
post anything on my Spree,
471
00:21:53,479 --> 00:21:54,646
just make sure to tag me.
472
00:21:54,647 --> 00:21:56,397
- I'm KurtsWorld96.
- [ Laughs ]
473
00:21:56,398 --> 00:21:57,857
Sir, are you a Twitter bot,
474
00:21:57,858 --> 00:21:59,484
or is there a real live
human boy in there?
475
00:21:59,485 --> 00:22:00,944
- [ Laughs ]
- Do not touch me.
476
00:22:00,945 --> 00:22:03,739
I'm as real as you. I don't...
477
00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:07,116
Yo, yo, I got to
say, you were...
478
00:22:07,117 --> 00:22:09,202
You were one of the
better sets that night.
479
00:22:09,203 --> 00:22:12,080
- Just very pro, I thought.
- JESSIE: Wow, thank you.
480
00:22:12,081 --> 00:22:13,748
- Thank you so much.
- MARIO: Don't... Don't be...
481
00:22:13,749 --> 00:22:15,458
JESSIE: Glad you think I'm pro,
482
00:22:15,459 --> 00:22:18,378
even though I was
doing a professional gig.
483
00:22:18,379 --> 00:22:20,588
Okay. Yo, yo, what up?
484
00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:23,258
It's your boy Mario,
and we out here.
485
00:22:23,259 --> 00:22:24,926
Guess who.
486
00:22:24,927 --> 00:22:27,595
Hot chick comedian
Jessie Adams in the house.
487
00:22:27,596 --> 00:22:29,597
Stop! Do not point
that phone in my face.
488
00:22:29,598 --> 00:22:30,765
- What is wrong with you?
- Yeah, point it at me,
489
00:22:30,766 --> 00:22:32,100
your driver, Kurt's World.
490
00:22:32,101 --> 00:22:33,434
- Kurt's World. Follow me.
- You shut the fuck up.
491
00:22:33,435 --> 00:22:35,019
- KurtsWorld96.
- You come on.
492
00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:36,437
Give me a little smile.
493
00:22:36,438 --> 00:22:39,232
Oh, my God, are all the
tanning oils getting to your head?
494
00:22:39,233 --> 00:22:41,693
I thought all you frat boys
didn't like black people?
495
00:22:41,694 --> 00:22:44,112
What the... Why
would you say that?
496
00:22:44,113 --> 00:22:46,281
That's not fucking true.
Now I can't even post this.
497
00:22:46,282 --> 00:22:47,615
Oh, no.
498
00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:49,617
Squirt's World,
just let me out here.
499
00:22:49,618 --> 00:22:51,119
No, come on, let me just do
this one more time, please.
500
00:22:51,120 --> 00:22:53,204
What? Are you serious?
You are pissing me off.
501
00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:55,456
Honestly, man, I'm
about ready to drop you off
502
00:22:55,457 --> 00:22:56,833
on the side of the road, okay?
503
00:22:56,834 --> 00:22:58,418
You're pissing off Jessie Adams.
504
00:22:58,419 --> 00:23:01,546
Just grab a water and get
ready to call another Spree.
505
00:23:01,547 --> 00:23:03,339
On the side of the
fucking highway?
506
00:23:03,340 --> 00:23:04,507
Are you nuts?
507
00:23:04,508 --> 00:23:06,092
No, no, I'm not.
And you know what?
508
00:23:06,093 --> 00:23:09,637
You just got yourself
a one-star rating, bitch.
509
00:23:09,638 --> 00:23:12,640
And you, you should really
use that beautiful smile
510
00:23:12,641 --> 00:23:13,933
a little bit more often.
511
00:23:13,934 --> 00:23:16,477
- Oh, wow. Okay, alright.
- Yeah.
512
00:23:16,478 --> 00:23:18,813
JESSIE: Hey, guys, I'm
stuck in a SpreeSocial
513
00:23:18,814 --> 00:23:20,273
with this defective clown.
514
00:23:20,274 --> 00:23:22,817
He's been nagging me
and asking me to smile.
515
00:23:22,818 --> 00:23:26,029
If you see him on the street,
just cross to the other side.
516
00:23:26,030 --> 00:23:28,406
Or just push him in traffic.
That'd be better for everybody.
517
00:23:28,407 --> 00:23:30,408
- He goes by the name of Mario.
- Hey, everyone, what's going on?
518
00:23:30,409 --> 00:23:31,826
KurtsWorld96 here.
519
00:23:31,827 --> 00:23:33,328
Follow me for "The
Lesson." Link's in the bio.
520
00:23:33,329 --> 00:23:35,830
- And I always follow back.
- JESSIE: Oh, my God.
521
00:23:35,831 --> 00:23:37,498
Why do I keep
doing this to myself?
522
00:23:37,499 --> 00:23:40,084
I'm in a fucking
SpreeSocial to save 3 bucks?
523
00:23:40,085 --> 00:23:43,172
For this headache? This
ever happen to you guys?
524
00:23:44,173 --> 00:23:47,258
I'm just saying that you
becoming Insta famous
525
00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:50,053
has really gone to your head,
'cause you're a total bitch.
526
00:23:50,054 --> 00:23:51,387
- [ Tires screech ]
- JESSIE: Oh.
527
00:23:51,388 --> 00:23:52,847
- Out.
- Me?
528
00:23:52,848 --> 00:23:55,475
She's the one being all
fucking mean and shit.
529
00:23:55,476 --> 00:23:57,060
No, fuck this. I'm getting out.
530
00:23:57,061 --> 00:23:58,436
No, no, no, wait. Are you sure?
531
00:23:58,437 --> 00:23:59,896
Fuck you.
532
00:23:59,897 --> 00:24:02,106
And you just, like,
reel it in a little bit.
533
00:24:02,107 --> 00:24:03,816
No one says "Follow
for follow" out loud.
534
00:24:03,817 --> 00:24:05,777
Wait, no, you...
You can't take that.
535
00:24:05,778 --> 00:24:07,654
- Why? 'Cause the ride was free?
- KURT: No, you just...
536
00:24:07,655 --> 00:24:09,573
- You cannot take that.
- Seriously?
537
00:24:11,075 --> 00:24:13,743
Hey, maybe don't be
such a bitch next time.
538
00:24:13,744 --> 00:24:15,871
JESSIE: Oh, how's
this for being a bitch?
539
00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:23,044
Just drive, faggot.
540
00:24:23,045 --> 00:24:24,588
[ Spits ]
541
00:24:25,714 --> 00:24:28,299
[ Window whirring ]
542
00:24:28,300 --> 00:24:29,717
You know what?
543
00:24:29,718 --> 00:24:34,723
The only way to fix
this is with some pussy.
544
00:24:40,771 --> 00:24:43,106
Yo, where the fuck
are we going right now?
545
00:24:43,107 --> 00:24:44,315
It's a shortcut.
546
00:24:44,316 --> 00:24:46,693
This is not a fucking
shortcut. Are you serious?
547
00:24:46,694 --> 00:24:48,069
Yeah, it is a shortcut.
548
00:24:48,070 --> 00:24:49,821
I know this park like
the back of my hand.
549
00:24:49,822 --> 00:24:51,030
MARIO: Got to be kidding me.
550
00:24:51,031 --> 00:24:52,949
JESSIE: Cross to the other side.
551
00:24:52,950 --> 00:24:55,451
Or just push him in traffic.
That'd be better for everybody.
552
00:24:55,452 --> 00:24:56,661
He goes by the name of Mario.
553
00:24:56,662 --> 00:24:58,413
Oh, fuck, I...
554
00:24:58,414 --> 00:24:59,956
I don't feel so good.
555
00:24:59,957 --> 00:25:02,583
You don't... You don't...
Do you need me to pull over?
556
00:25:02,584 --> 00:25:04,585
Oh, yo, she's got
like 200K followers.
557
00:25:04,586 --> 00:25:06,629
I'm getting all
this hate already.
558
00:25:06,630 --> 00:25:08,131
Don't vomit in my car.
559
00:25:08,132 --> 00:25:09,799
Oh, God! Fuck.
560
00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:13,095
This fucking... Got
to be kidding me.
561
00:25:13,637 --> 00:25:15,763
What the fuck, man? Keep going.
562
00:25:15,764 --> 00:25:18,307
No, if you're gonna
barf, get out of my car.
563
00:25:18,308 --> 00:25:21,769
I have some dumb
bitch waiting for me.
564
00:25:21,770 --> 00:25:24,856
And I need to go fuck
her right fucking now!
565
00:25:24,857 --> 00:25:27,734
I need to keep my car clean!
566
00:25:27,735 --> 00:25:31,154
So if you're gonna hurl,
get outside and do it. Go.
567
00:25:31,155 --> 00:25:34,282
Alright, you know what? I
got to take a piss anyway.
568
00:25:34,283 --> 00:25:36,159
That's the only reason
I'm doing this right now.
569
00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:37,785
You fucking beta.
570
00:25:37,786 --> 00:25:39,747
Zero stars for you.
571
00:25:44,126 --> 00:25:46,669
- [ Beep ]
- ♪ Ooh, I'm a gummy bear ♪
572
00:25:46,670 --> 00:25:48,504
♪ Yes, I'm a gummy bear ♪
573
00:25:48,505 --> 00:25:52,300
♪ Oh, I'm a yummy, tummy,
funny, lucky gummy bear ♪
574
00:25:52,301 --> 00:25:55,887
♪ I'm a jelly bear 'cause
I'm a gummy bear ♪
575
00:25:55,888 --> 00:25:59,682
♪ Oh, I'm a movin', groovin',
jammin', singin' gummy bear ♪
576
00:25:59,683 --> 00:26:04,270
♪ I'm a gummy, gummy,
gummy, gummy, gummy bear ♪
577
00:26:04,271 --> 00:26:07,983
♪ Gummy, gummy, gummy,
gummy, gummy bear ♪
578
00:26:09,610 --> 00:26:11,278
Wow, are you guys seeing this?
579
00:26:19,411 --> 00:26:20,788
Fun.
580
00:26:22,498 --> 00:26:23,998
♪ Oh, I'm a gummy bear ♪
581
00:26:23,999 --> 00:26:25,666
♪ Yes, I'm a gummy bear ♪
582
00:26:25,667 --> 00:26:29,587
♪ Oh, I'm a yummy, tummy,
funny, lucky gummy bear ♪
583
00:26:29,588 --> 00:26:33,633
♪ I'm a jelly bear 'cause
I'm a gummy bear ♪
584
00:26:33,634 --> 00:26:37,512
♪ Oh, I'm a movin', groovin',
jammin', singin' gummy bear ♪
585
00:26:37,513 --> 00:26:38,847
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
586
00:26:39,598 --> 00:26:42,767
Okay, look, I know this
face mask looks this way
587
00:26:42,768 --> 00:26:44,185
because it's a charcoal mask.
588
00:26:44,186 --> 00:26:45,436
I know that.
589
00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:47,605
But doesn't it feel like
maybe, just maybe,
590
00:26:47,606 --> 00:26:50,441
this was created so people
could try out blackface
591
00:26:50,442 --> 00:26:52,360
for 10 to 15 minutes at a time?
592
00:26:52,361 --> 00:26:55,196
Look at this white lady.
Look at how happy she is.
593
00:26:55,197 --> 00:26:58,658
She knows she's getting
away with something.
594
00:26:58,659 --> 00:27:00,409
I'm just saying.
595
00:27:00,410 --> 00:27:01,828
Shit.
596
00:27:01,829 --> 00:27:03,704
- Wait.
- ♪ Gummy bear ♪
597
00:27:03,705 --> 00:27:05,414
♪ Oh, I'm a gummy bear ♪
598
00:27:05,415 --> 00:27:06,707
Let there be light.
599
00:27:06,708 --> 00:27:08,709
You think I would
let "The Lesson"
600
00:27:08,710 --> 00:27:10,419
continue in the dark?
601
00:27:10,420 --> 00:27:12,380
Check that.
602
00:27:12,381 --> 00:27:13,798
Perfect.
603
00:27:13,799 --> 00:27:15,383
She's got good content.
604
00:27:15,384 --> 00:27:17,969
- She needs me.
- [ Laughter ]
605
00:27:17,970 --> 00:27:20,221
Like, if a woman's
not smiling all the time
606
00:27:20,222 --> 00:27:22,890
or looking happy all the
time, she looks like a bitch?
607
00:27:22,891 --> 00:27:25,393
- No, bitch, that was me.
- [ Laughter ]
608
00:27:25,394 --> 00:27:28,896
Damn, girl, your
carpet looking ratchet.
609
00:27:28,897 --> 00:27:30,439
Bew-bew-bew!
610
00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:32,483
I been scammed, bruh.
611
00:27:32,484 --> 00:27:33,735
[ Laughter ]
612
00:27:37,156 --> 00:27:39,407
I looked at my phone.
I looked back up.
613
00:27:39,408 --> 00:27:41,492
His dick was out.
614
00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:42,827
Learned my lesson.
615
00:27:42,828 --> 00:27:45,621
I don't tell anyone
the time anymore.
616
00:27:45,622 --> 00:27:47,456
That's my active bitch face.
617
00:27:47,457 --> 00:27:48,791
What time is it?
618
00:27:48,792 --> 00:27:49,834
Time for you to
go fuck yourself.
619
00:27:49,835 --> 00:27:50,918
That's what time it is.
620
00:27:50,919 --> 00:27:52,753
Alright, thank you very much.
621
00:27:52,754 --> 00:27:54,422
Hmm.
622
00:27:54,423 --> 00:27:56,841
Doing a show tonight.
623
00:27:56,842 --> 00:27:58,217
Joke Bros.
624
00:27:58,218 --> 00:28:00,887
Big presence.
Joke Bros are huge.
625
00:28:00,888 --> 00:28:02,263
Too bad I can't go.
626
00:28:02,264 --> 00:28:04,432
It's funny how the
stars will align like that.
627
00:28:04,433 --> 00:28:07,101
Me and Jessie, two big things...
628
00:28:07,102 --> 00:28:10,147
Two big things happening
on the... on the same night.
629
00:28:12,065 --> 00:28:14,276
It's universal coincidence.
630
00:28:22,159 --> 00:28:25,204
Never miss an
opportunity for branding.
631
00:28:27,539 --> 00:28:29,123
Are you with me on this, Bobby?
632
00:28:29,124 --> 00:28:31,500
I mean, I knew this
was going to work.
633
00:28:31,501 --> 00:28:33,085
I knew it.
634
00:28:33,086 --> 00:28:35,755
Uh, what does that mean?
635
00:28:35,756 --> 00:28:38,883
Dude, I'm literally, like,
the only one watching.
636
00:28:38,884 --> 00:28:41,093
Yeah, Bobby, that's
because everybody knows
637
00:28:41,094 --> 00:28:42,470
we're taking a break right now.
638
00:28:42,471 --> 00:28:44,305
I'm tipping off my tank.
639
00:28:44,306 --> 00:28:47,768
And they were... It was
double digits before.
640
00:28:55,025 --> 00:28:58,779
Less than 10
equals single digits.
641
00:29:02,658 --> 00:29:04,367
How is this even possible?
642
00:29:04,368 --> 00:29:06,619
I'm literally out here
giving everything I've got.
643
00:29:06,620 --> 00:29:10,706
I'm picking people up
and dropping them off.
644
00:29:10,707 --> 00:29:12,251
Dropping them off.
645
00:29:16,588 --> 00:29:20,675
No one wants to watch a white
guy drive around and whatever.
646
00:29:20,676 --> 00:29:21,885
Whatever?
647
00:29:22,928 --> 00:29:25,012
I... [ Chuckles ]
648
00:29:25,013 --> 00:29:29,351
Dude, I'm literally
out here, like, live...
649
00:29:31,561 --> 00:29:33,063
killing people.
650
00:29:37,317 --> 00:29:39,402
No, Bobby, it's
not stale content.
651
00:29:39,403 --> 00:29:41,362
It's authentic. Alright, it's...
652
00:29:41,363 --> 00:29:45,033
It's like, um, homeless
hero, y-you know?
653
00:29:47,619 --> 00:29:49,871
Watch it again LOL.
654
00:29:55,335 --> 00:29:57,878
Now, you guys know I
usually prank the homeless.
655
00:29:57,879 --> 00:29:59,046
Homeless prank 17.
656
00:29:59,047 --> 00:30:01,049
Here we go, guys.
Check this out.
657
00:30:03,635 --> 00:30:05,011
It's not even real money, bro.
658
00:30:05,012 --> 00:30:07,013
But today we're doing
something different.
659
00:30:07,014 --> 00:30:08,347
Your boy had a
little change of heart,
660
00:30:08,348 --> 00:30:10,641
and I'm really glad that I did.
661
00:30:10,642 --> 00:30:13,394
I wanted to know what an
authentic homeless guy would do
662
00:30:13,395 --> 00:30:15,604
if he found a real
$100 bill on the street.
663
00:30:15,605 --> 00:30:18,607
So I set it up and secretly
followed him around.
664
00:30:18,608 --> 00:30:20,151
Let's go.
665
00:30:20,152 --> 00:30:23,863
Liquor store. Pathetic.
666
00:30:23,864 --> 00:30:27,034
How many 40s can $100 get you?
667
00:30:29,202 --> 00:30:32,289
Now let's see where he's
headed with his big score.
668
00:30:37,127 --> 00:30:39,421
Oh, wait. What's going on?
669
00:30:40,047 --> 00:30:42,465
Oh, my God, it looks
like he just gave them food
670
00:30:42,466 --> 00:30:44,258
and, like, supplies
for them to eat.
671
00:30:44,259 --> 00:30:48,512
Wow. Looks like this guy
really is a homeless hero.
672
00:30:48,513 --> 00:30:50,431
This guy went out and
made a huge difference
673
00:30:50,432 --> 00:30:52,600
for his community,
and you can, too.
674
00:30:52,601 --> 00:30:55,102
Drop a like and smash
that "subscribe" button.
675
00:30:55,103 --> 00:30:58,148
It makes a huge difference.
676
00:31:11,870 --> 00:31:13,704
Okay, okay, okay, Bobby. Fine.
677
00:31:13,705 --> 00:31:16,540
You're right. I promise
to spice things up.
678
00:31:16,541 --> 00:31:18,918
But what about your
promise to me, Bobby, huh?
679
00:31:18,919 --> 00:31:20,587
What about your promise?
680
00:31:25,217 --> 00:31:27,510
You promised that you would
share "The Lesson" tonight.
681
00:31:27,511 --> 00:31:30,888
I don't see... I haven't
seen anything from you.
682
00:31:30,889 --> 00:31:32,974
Not anything.
683
00:31:37,312 --> 00:31:40,482
It's not fucking evil.
It's awesome content.
684
00:31:46,905 --> 00:31:50,950
Add some WTF moments or GTFO.
685
00:31:50,951 --> 00:31:52,326
Okay.
686
00:31:52,327 --> 00:31:55,329
[ Dance music playing ]
687
00:31:55,330 --> 00:31:56,956
- [ Horn honking ]
- WOMAN: What the fuck?
688
00:31:56,957 --> 00:31:59,333
Stop! Stop!
689
00:31:59,334 --> 00:32:01,710
- Fuck you!
- What the fuck?
690
00:32:01,711 --> 00:32:04,505
[ Tires screeching ]
691
00:32:04,506 --> 00:32:06,382
- [ Screaming ]
- I got it, I got it, I got it!
692
00:32:06,383 --> 00:32:08,300
I got it! I've got it!
693
00:32:08,301 --> 00:32:10,469
- I've got it.
- What the fuck are you doing?
694
00:32:10,470 --> 00:32:13,097
Oh, my God, okay. So boring.
695
00:32:13,098 --> 00:32:15,933
Oh, my gosh.
Check this out. Ohh.
696
00:32:15,934 --> 00:32:18,769
No one cares about your
fucking stupid lights, dude.
697
00:32:18,770 --> 00:32:19,854
You almost just killed us.
698
00:32:19,855 --> 00:32:21,522
No, I didn't.
699
00:32:21,523 --> 00:32:23,816
Come on, you guys, this
is what we said we wanted.
700
00:32:23,817 --> 00:32:25,818
- An adventure.
- No, London.
701
00:32:25,819 --> 00:32:28,028
Things that we can put
on the Gram, that's it.
702
00:32:28,029 --> 00:32:29,613
You know what? Whatever.
703
00:32:29,614 --> 00:32:32,074
Next time why don't you guys
just buy a fucking Groupon
704
00:32:32,075 --> 00:32:34,202
and count me out, you pussies.
705
00:32:36,455 --> 00:32:38,038
She's mad.
706
00:32:38,039 --> 00:32:40,207
[ Sighs ]
707
00:32:40,208 --> 00:32:42,001
Is this okay?
708
00:32:42,002 --> 00:32:44,087
Yeah, yeah, sure.
709
00:32:44,921 --> 00:32:48,215
Don't listen to them, because
I think you're a badass.
710
00:32:48,216 --> 00:32:49,550
Your lips are so pretty.
711
00:32:49,551 --> 00:32:52,429
- Thanks, babe.
- I need pretty lips.
712
00:32:53,388 --> 00:32:55,223
Hold on. What the fuck is that?
713
00:32:55,724 --> 00:32:58,559
- Oh, what's this, Mr. Fix-it?
- KURT: No, no!
714
00:32:58,560 --> 00:33:01,896
No! No. No.
715
00:33:01,897 --> 00:33:05,274
- Don't touch his drill.
- Don't touch his drill.
716
00:33:05,275 --> 00:33:06,859
- It's cute, though.
- You know what?
717
00:33:06,860 --> 00:33:09,570
I think... I actually think I
know what you guys want.
718
00:33:09,571 --> 00:33:11,655
Get people to think you're
having, like, a big adventure,
719
00:33:11,656 --> 00:33:13,991
like, a total WTF
moment, am I right?
720
00:33:13,992 --> 00:33:15,034
Yeah.
721
00:33:15,035 --> 00:33:17,703
Well, honestly, I know this...
722
00:33:17,704 --> 00:33:19,914
I know this spot that
not a lot of people know.
723
00:33:19,915 --> 00:33:21,874
And it's a really
incredible view,
724
00:33:21,875 --> 00:33:24,585
and it'll be empty right now.
725
00:33:24,586 --> 00:33:27,254
- What if we go hit it up?
- Yeah, that sounds cool.
726
00:33:27,255 --> 00:33:28,714
Yeah? What do you
guys think about that?
727
00:33:28,715 --> 00:33:29,798
Would you guys want to go?
728
00:33:29,799 --> 00:33:31,050
Fucking incredible spot.
729
00:33:31,051 --> 00:33:32,134
Fuck it, sure.
730
00:33:32,135 --> 00:33:33,678
- Let's fest.
- Yeah.
731
00:33:45,190 --> 00:33:47,609
[ Dog barking ]
732
00:33:48,944 --> 00:33:50,445
[ Whirring ]
733
00:33:54,950 --> 00:33:57,868
Alright, guys, get your
phones out, get up there.
734
00:33:57,869 --> 00:33:59,286
- Go for it.
- Up there?
735
00:33:59,287 --> 00:34:02,248
Are you being serious?
Put our heads up there?
736
00:34:02,249 --> 00:34:03,667
Live a little.
737
00:34:04,626 --> 00:34:06,001
Okay, let's do it.
738
00:34:06,002 --> 00:34:07,503
Feel like prom.
739
00:34:07,504 --> 00:34:10,214
- Oh, we're prom queens.
- KURT: Get up there, guys.
740
00:34:10,215 --> 00:34:12,592
We're both prom queens.
Okay, stop yelling at us.
741
00:34:13,468 --> 00:34:16,971
Hey, guys, it's so random.
742
00:34:16,972 --> 00:34:18,597
I want to take a picture
743
00:34:18,598 --> 00:34:20,307
looking, like,
this super pretty,
744
00:34:20,308 --> 00:34:22,142
- against, like, the ugly stuff.
- Yes.
745
00:34:22,143 --> 00:34:23,936
Hey, you guys, make
sure to take some selfies,
746
00:34:23,937 --> 00:34:27,022
and if you do, tag it
#TheLesson, one word.
747
00:34:27,023 --> 00:34:28,816
Bless... #blessings.
748
00:34:28,817 --> 00:34:30,985
- No, #TheLesson.
- No, #TheLesson, one word.
749
00:34:30,986 --> 00:34:32,653
- #TheLesson.
- #TheLesson.
750
00:34:32,654 --> 00:34:35,322
- #TheLesson.
- LONDON: Oh, my God, Kurt.
751
00:34:35,323 --> 00:34:37,283
This place is so funky.
752
00:34:37,284 --> 00:34:39,118
But so beautiful.
753
00:34:39,119 --> 00:34:40,494
Thanks, yeah.
754
00:34:40,495 --> 00:34:42,621
Yeah, my mom's dad
used to own this place.
755
00:34:42,622 --> 00:34:45,583
- So I practically grew up here.
- Really?
756
00:34:45,584 --> 00:34:48,043
Oh, my God, there's for
sure a dead body here.
757
00:34:48,044 --> 00:34:51,797
It smells like there's, like,
several dead bodies here.
758
00:34:51,798 --> 00:34:55,050
My mom actually found
this here. She gave it to me.
759
00:34:55,051 --> 00:34:58,178
That's so sweet.
760
00:34:58,179 --> 00:35:00,180
She must really love you.
761
00:35:00,181 --> 00:35:02,433
Yeah, she ditched
my dad right after that.
762
00:35:02,434 --> 00:35:04,101
She used to be a
major star fucker.
763
00:35:04,102 --> 00:35:06,687
Hmm. That sucks, I guess.
764
00:35:06,688 --> 00:35:09,982
No, it's okay. My dad's
a fucking loser anyway.
765
00:35:09,983 --> 00:35:11,609
I kind of feel like
I'm having déjà vu.
766
00:35:11,610 --> 00:35:13,527
[ Gasps ] Did you
know that means
767
00:35:13,528 --> 00:35:15,029
you're exactly where
you're supposed to be?
768
00:35:15,030 --> 00:35:19,658
It's 'cause I am exactly
where I'm supposed to be.
769
00:35:19,659 --> 00:35:20,619
Fuck.
770
00:35:20,620 --> 00:35:23,371
[ Up-tempo music plays ]
771
00:35:30,211 --> 00:35:32,880
Oh, my God, oh,
my God. Kurt! Guys!
772
00:35:32,881 --> 00:35:34,840
[ Laughs ]
773
00:35:34,841 --> 00:35:37,718
- Aah, London, what the fuck?
- LONDON: Are you okay?
774
00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:40,721
Oh, my God, bitch,
this is amazing!
775
00:35:40,722 --> 00:35:44,391
Driver, you're
getting five stars.
776
00:35:44,392 --> 00:35:46,644
Hey, roll your window
down and get your phone out.
777
00:35:46,645 --> 00:35:48,688
You're not gonna
want to miss this.
778
00:35:51,232 --> 00:35:53,192
- Whoo!
- [ Whirring ]
779
00:35:53,193 --> 00:35:55,778
Wait, stop, stop.
780
00:35:55,779 --> 00:35:57,655
Fuck, fuck. Ow!
781
00:35:57,656 --> 00:35:58,656
Aah!
782
00:36:01,660 --> 00:36:02,911
[ Laughs ]
783
00:36:04,162 --> 00:36:06,330
Oh, my God, Kurt, be careful.
784
00:36:06,331 --> 00:36:07,998
KURT: Oh, sorry. I'm
just trying to give you guys
785
00:36:07,999 --> 00:36:09,500
cool shit you can post.
786
00:36:09,501 --> 00:36:12,127
Oh, my God, look how
many likes I'm getting.
787
00:36:12,128 --> 00:36:14,213
Oh, show me.
788
00:36:14,214 --> 00:36:15,798
- [ Dogs barking ]
- Aah! Ah!
789
00:36:15,799 --> 00:36:18,384
Oh, my God! Roll the window up!
790
00:36:18,385 --> 00:36:20,511
Roll the window up.
791
00:36:20,512 --> 00:36:22,263
Roll up the window.
792
00:36:25,975 --> 00:36:28,436
[ Screaming ]
793
00:36:33,233 --> 00:36:34,693
[ Drill whirring ]
794
00:36:38,071 --> 00:36:40,615
[ Ringing ]
795
00:36:47,080 --> 00:36:48,497
BOBBY: What's up, dude?
796
00:36:48,498 --> 00:36:51,208
Yo, yo, did you just
fucking see that?
797
00:36:51,209 --> 00:36:52,668
BOBBY: See what?
798
00:36:52,669 --> 00:36:55,254
I just got, like, the most
epic fucking kill ever.
799
00:36:55,255 --> 00:36:57,297
It was a triple KO. Bobby.
800
00:36:57,298 --> 00:36:58,799
BOBBY: Well, if a
tree falls in the forest
801
00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:00,634
and there's no
one there to see it,
802
00:37:00,635 --> 00:37:02,970
like, does it even
actually fall, dude? No.
803
00:37:02,971 --> 00:37:04,638
KURT: What the fuck is
wrong with everybody?
804
00:37:04,639 --> 00:37:06,056
This should be
going viral by now.
805
00:37:06,057 --> 00:37:07,141
I just got seven.
806
00:37:07,142 --> 00:37:08,475
Bobby I got seven
rideshare kills.
807
00:37:08,476 --> 00:37:10,310
Why... Why isn't this trending?
808
00:37:10,311 --> 00:37:12,229
BOBBY: 'Cause you're
not fucking good at this.
809
00:37:12,230 --> 00:37:15,983
Wake up. Okay, some people
are born with influencer vibes.
810
00:37:15,984 --> 00:37:17,359
And some people are not.
811
00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:18,819
Okay, like that comedian girl
812
00:37:18,820 --> 00:37:20,946
who was in the back of
your Spree, Jessie Adams,
813
00:37:20,947 --> 00:37:22,239
I checked out her shit,
814
00:37:22,240 --> 00:37:25,284
and she's got great energy
and an authentic brand.
815
00:37:25,285 --> 00:37:26,702
Why don't you take
a look at her story
816
00:37:26,703 --> 00:37:29,830
and see how it's done, retard?
817
00:37:29,831 --> 00:37:32,000
No 'roids here.
818
00:37:37,422 --> 00:37:39,256
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
819
00:37:39,257 --> 00:37:40,924
- [ Dogs barking ]
- [ Gasps ]
820
00:37:40,925 --> 00:37:44,887
Oh, my gosh, it's
a puppy parade.
821
00:37:44,888 --> 00:37:46,680
- Can I pet them?
- Yeah.
822
00:37:46,681 --> 00:37:49,224
Oh, my goodness.
This is how I want to die.
823
00:37:49,225 --> 00:37:51,560
Yes, yes, hi.
824
00:37:51,561 --> 00:37:55,355
Can I have one of these,
maybe two of these?
825
00:37:55,356 --> 00:37:57,692
Oh, my God.
826
00:37:58,193 --> 00:37:59,777
The love of my life.
827
00:37:59,778 --> 00:38:01,945
He's been nagging me
and asking me to smile.
828
00:38:01,946 --> 00:38:05,324
If you see him on the street,
just cross to the other side.
829
00:38:05,325 --> 00:38:07,785
Or just push him in traffic.
That'd be better for everybody.
830
00:38:07,786 --> 00:38:09,620
- He goes by the name of Mario.
- Hey, everyone, what's going on?
831
00:38:09,621 --> 00:38:11,038
KurtsWorld96 here.
832
00:38:11,039 --> 00:38:12,706
Follow me for "The
Lesson." Link's in the bio.
833
00:38:12,707 --> 00:38:15,000
- And I always follow back.
- JESSIE: Oh, my God.
834
00:38:15,001 --> 00:38:18,462
It's in the past. It's
not gonna ruin my day.
835
00:38:18,463 --> 00:38:20,380
Silver linings playbook...
836
00:38:20,381 --> 00:38:22,633
Got to get your steps
in wherever you can.
837
00:38:22,634 --> 00:38:24,593
Everything happens for a reason.
838
00:38:24,594 --> 00:38:26,720
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
839
00:38:26,721 --> 00:38:28,472
Okay, so you know
how I was saying
840
00:38:28,473 --> 00:38:30,891
tonight is gonna be
a very special night?
841
00:38:30,892 --> 00:38:33,644
Well, the Joke Bros
are coming to my show,
842
00:38:33,645 --> 00:38:34,895
and they're
live-streaming my set
843
00:38:34,896 --> 00:38:36,688
for their midnight
madness thing.
844
00:38:36,689 --> 00:38:39,399
Like a million people are
gonna be watching this tonight.
845
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:41,068
She doesn't even film
her stories vertically.
846
00:38:41,069 --> 00:38:43,403
For one of my toughest critics.
847
00:38:43,404 --> 00:38:45,531
Do all of her fans
have neck problems?
848
00:38:45,532 --> 00:38:47,575
- You ready?
- She's going live.
849
00:38:49,661 --> 00:38:51,538
And this is vertical?
850
00:38:52,539 --> 00:38:53,789
That's totally inconsistent,
851
00:38:53,790 --> 00:38:58,461
and consistency's
the first ground rule.
852
00:38:59,087 --> 00:39:02,089
Do you have any
brand identity at all?
853
00:39:02,090 --> 00:39:06,093
Makes me upset when
you're not being uniform.
854
00:39:06,094 --> 00:39:07,678
JESSIE: You fell
asleep during my jokes.
855
00:39:07,679 --> 00:39:10,055
Was you telling jokes?
856
00:39:10,056 --> 00:39:11,723
I don't think I would
have closed my eyes
857
00:39:11,724 --> 00:39:13,267
if I had heard jokes.
858
00:39:13,268 --> 00:39:15,102
Jessie Adams, if you're
listening, you disappoint me.
859
00:39:15,103 --> 00:39:18,522
If you think it's so easy,
then you say something funny.
860
00:39:18,523 --> 00:39:21,066
Something funny. [ Laughs ]
861
00:39:21,067 --> 00:39:24,069
JESSIE: Okay, now you
all see where I get it from.
862
00:39:24,070 --> 00:39:25,696
It's one of the oldest
tricks in the book.
863
00:39:25,697 --> 00:39:28,574
- But it still works.
- But it still works.
864
00:39:28,575 --> 00:39:30,117
JESSIE: Oh, my God,
like a broken record.
865
00:39:30,118 --> 00:39:32,035
KURT: This is not
very relatable to me.
866
00:39:32,036 --> 00:39:34,246
- 'Cause my grandma's dead.
- JESSIE: Uh-oh, Grandma.
867
00:39:34,247 --> 00:39:35,873
My fans think you're a snack.
868
00:39:35,874 --> 00:39:38,835
How would... How... How
would everyone relate to this?
869
00:39:40,962 --> 00:39:42,671
She's gonna get a
million views tonight.
870
00:39:42,672 --> 00:39:44,673
And I'm gonna get nothing?
871
00:39:44,674 --> 00:39:47,427
- The dog filter.
- No.
872
00:39:49,137 --> 00:39:50,679
I'm not letting that happen.
873
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:52,639
I wish I could
hang out all night
874
00:39:52,640 --> 00:39:55,434
with this strong,
beautiful queen.
875
00:39:55,435 --> 00:39:57,102
But instead I have
to go hang out
876
00:39:57,103 --> 00:39:58,979
with you bozos
coming to my show.
877
00:39:58,980 --> 00:40:01,481
You promised me
an audience, Bobby.
878
00:40:01,482 --> 00:40:03,817
Don't be using me as
no ticket bait, either.
879
00:40:03,818 --> 00:40:06,153
- Damn, Gram.
- That should be my audience.
880
00:40:06,154 --> 00:40:07,738
And if I can't have it,
why can she have it?
881
00:40:07,739 --> 00:40:09,323
When you get to be my age
882
00:40:09,324 --> 00:40:12,701
and you just a few feet
away from the grim reaper,
883
00:40:12,702 --> 00:40:14,119
- you don't have no choice.
- Should be my audience.
884
00:40:14,120 --> 00:40:15,662
Please don't talk
about the grim reaper.
885
00:40:15,663 --> 00:40:16,997
You're gonna live forever. Okay?
886
00:40:16,998 --> 00:40:18,624
I don't know what I
would do without you.
887
00:40:18,625 --> 00:40:20,959
KURT: Things have to be fair.
888
00:40:20,960 --> 00:40:24,588
Okay, now is the moment
you've all been waiting for.
889
00:40:24,589 --> 00:40:26,256
KURT: Things have
to be fair, Jessie.
890
00:40:26,257 --> 00:40:27,424
JESSIE: Don't go anywhere.
891
00:40:27,425 --> 00:40:28,675
It's my house.
892
00:40:28,676 --> 00:40:29,676
[ Jessie laughs ]
893
00:40:29,677 --> 00:40:31,094
Why would I go anywhere?
894
00:40:31,095 --> 00:40:33,013
JESSIE Yeah,
that's a good point.
895
00:40:33,014 --> 00:40:36,099
Oh, that's so sweet, Jonesy.
That means a lot to me.
896
00:40:36,100 --> 00:40:38,518
Yeah, let me know what you
guys think of the set tonight.
897
00:40:38,519 --> 00:40:40,187
It's gonna be a weird one.
898
00:40:40,188 --> 00:40:43,482
GRANDMA: That phone's
making you act foolish.
899
00:40:43,483 --> 00:40:44,691
JESSIE: Thanks
for ironing, Grandma.
900
00:40:44,692 --> 00:40:47,110
Hope you're
watching this, Bobby.
901
00:40:47,111 --> 00:40:49,237
What do you think
of these pants?
902
00:40:49,238 --> 00:40:51,281
Too Ronald McDonald?
903
00:40:51,282 --> 00:40:52,866
Honk, honk. [ Laughs ]
904
00:40:52,867 --> 00:40:55,369
Not trying to be
a clown tonight.
905
00:40:55,370 --> 00:40:57,329
Maybe this.
906
00:40:57,330 --> 00:41:01,208
I like this. Maybe
some "Kill Bill" yellow.
907
00:41:01,209 --> 00:41:03,962
- Like a little bumblebee.
- [ Knock on door ]
908
00:41:05,338 --> 00:41:07,465
Who the fuck is that?
909
00:41:11,970 --> 00:41:13,054
Grandma.
910
00:41:14,472 --> 00:41:16,306
Grandma, are you
expecting somebody?
911
00:41:16,307 --> 00:41:19,476
GRANDMA: I told you
the reaper was close.
912
00:41:19,477 --> 00:41:20,852
JESSIE: Oh, my God.
913
00:41:20,853 --> 00:41:22,521
Who would come
here at this hour?
914
00:41:22,522 --> 00:41:24,565
I thought I was
your only friend.
915
00:41:27,694 --> 00:41:30,112
- Your chariot awaits.
- What are you doing here?
916
00:41:30,113 --> 00:41:31,571
JESSIE: I told you I'd
meet you at the show.
917
00:41:31,572 --> 00:41:32,781
Yeah, no, I saw your story.
918
00:41:32,782 --> 00:41:34,282
I figured you could
use some help.
919
00:41:34,283 --> 00:41:35,826
Like, I think we should talk.
920
00:41:35,827 --> 00:41:37,911
Are you streaming me in
your fucking shit right now?
921
00:41:37,912 --> 00:41:39,371
KURT: Sorry. It's important.
922
00:41:39,372 --> 00:41:41,415
I knew I shouldn't have
told you where I moved.
923
00:41:41,416 --> 00:41:42,958
Dude, you need to go, okay?
924
00:41:42,959 --> 00:41:44,918
I don't want to be part of
your dumb evil shit, alright?
925
00:41:44,919 --> 00:41:46,253
KURT: No, you
are part of it, okay?
926
00:41:46,254 --> 00:41:47,796
'Cause we're... we're...
We're collaborators.
927
00:41:47,797 --> 00:41:49,589
- We're big-time collaborators.
- No, no.
928
00:41:49,590 --> 00:41:50,841
For the record,
we're definitely not.
929
00:41:50,842 --> 00:41:53,093
- Alright, later, Kurt.
- KURT: No, no.
930
00:41:53,094 --> 00:41:54,262
No.
931
00:41:55,847 --> 00:41:57,264
Alright, you asked
for this, man.
932
00:41:57,265 --> 00:41:58,640
[ Beeping ]
933
00:41:58,641 --> 00:42:00,976
What is up, BaseCamp?
It's that time again.
934
00:42:00,977 --> 00:42:04,563
Bobby Court, where I am the
judge, jury, and executioner.
935
00:42:04,564 --> 00:42:07,232
Today I actually wanted to set
the record straight on something
936
00:42:07,233 --> 00:42:09,151
that's been bugging
me for a minute, y'all.
937
00:42:09,152 --> 00:42:10,819
See this motherfucker
right here?
938
00:42:10,820 --> 00:42:12,070
This guy's name is Kurt.
939
00:42:12,071 --> 00:42:13,905
And just because
he used to babysit me
940
00:42:13,906 --> 00:42:15,907
when I was, like, fucking 2,
he thinks I owe him something.
941
00:42:15,908 --> 00:42:17,617
I don't owe you shit dude, okay?
942
00:42:17,618 --> 00:42:20,412
Now Kurt's up to some
super, super-evil shit,
943
00:42:20,413 --> 00:42:21,830
and he's trying to pin it on me.
944
00:42:21,831 --> 00:42:23,290
You see, guys, the
thing about Kurt is,
945
00:42:23,291 --> 00:42:26,293
he really wants attention,
and he needs it, too.
946
00:42:26,294 --> 00:42:29,254
Fucking medical attention,
dude. You legally insane.
947
00:42:29,255 --> 00:42:30,881
That's my verdict.
948
00:42:30,882 --> 00:42:32,132
Dude, should I call you
an ambulance right now?
949
00:42:32,133 --> 00:42:33,675
Maybe they can
take you out of here.
950
00:42:33,676 --> 00:42:36,303
No. Honestly, Bobby,
I just wanted to...
951
00:42:36,304 --> 00:42:39,306
I wanted to... I wanted to
tell you that I had figured it out,
952
00:42:39,307 --> 00:42:40,933
something so important.
953
00:42:42,351 --> 00:42:44,936
Well, tell BaseCamp
something super important
954
00:42:44,937 --> 00:42:47,773
and then get out my fucking
face before I report your account.
955
00:42:47,774 --> 00:42:49,232
And quit fucking
filming me, dude.
956
00:42:49,233 --> 00:42:50,984
I don't want to be on
your fucking stream.
957
00:42:50,985 --> 00:42:53,070
You fuck... You asked for it.
958
00:42:53,071 --> 00:42:55,447
You... Okay.
959
00:42:55,448 --> 00:42:59,118
I fucking... I figured out the
last two steps of "The Lesson."
960
00:43:00,411 --> 00:43:02,829
Step one... hijack Jessie
Adams' comedy show.
961
00:43:02,830 --> 00:43:04,164
It's a shortcut to
a huge audience.
962
00:43:04,165 --> 00:43:05,624
A lot of people
are gonna be there.
963
00:43:05,625 --> 00:43:07,167
She's huge. She
has a huge following.
964
00:43:07,168 --> 00:43:09,586
[ Scoffs ] Yeah, it's a
really good idea for you,
965
00:43:09,587 --> 00:43:13,173
being someone with no sense
of humor and no social skills.
966
00:43:13,174 --> 00:43:16,510
The face of an inbred dog.
What's step two, retard?
967
00:43:16,511 --> 00:43:18,553
Become the fucking president?
968
00:43:18,554 --> 00:43:20,097
What are you gonna do?
969
00:43:20,098 --> 00:43:22,725
[ Grunts, breathing heavily ]
970
00:43:25,686 --> 00:43:26,978
What the fuck, dude?
971
00:43:26,979 --> 00:43:29,606
This shit isn't
supposed to be real.
972
00:43:29,607 --> 00:43:32,276
[ Breathing heavily ]
973
00:43:37,115 --> 00:43:38,199
KURT: Bobby.
974
00:43:41,202 --> 00:43:43,620
- Wait.
- Get the fuck off me.
975
00:43:43,621 --> 00:43:44,872
[ Gunshot ]
976
00:43:48,751 --> 00:43:50,628
[ Gunshot ]
977
00:43:52,171 --> 00:43:55,090
What the fuck? I'll
kill you, motherfucker!
978
00:43:55,091 --> 00:43:57,218
[ Gunshot ]
979
00:44:16,737 --> 00:44:18,406
U got got.
980
00:44:19,782 --> 00:44:22,033
- [ Tires screeching ]
- [ Laughs ]
981
00:44:22,034 --> 00:44:24,578
Oh, my God, Miles, stop
trying to be Vin Diesel.
982
00:44:24,579 --> 00:44:26,705
You sound like a fucking hyena.
983
00:44:26,706 --> 00:44:28,498
"Thanks for the ride, Miles."
984
00:44:28,499 --> 00:44:30,083
I didn't ask for
the ride, Miles.
985
00:44:30,084 --> 00:44:32,627
You were stalking my
grandma's house for some reason.
986
00:44:32,628 --> 00:44:33,879
Fucking freak.
987
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:35,922
Yeah, well, I just
didn't want you
988
00:44:35,923 --> 00:44:37,257
to be late for Joke Bros, okay?
989
00:44:37,258 --> 00:44:39,009
You don't have
to worry about me.
990
00:44:39,010 --> 00:44:41,094
- You're not my manager.
- I know I'm not your manager,
991
00:44:41,095 --> 00:44:47,434
but someone needs to manage
you, and I guess I nominate myself.
992
00:44:47,435 --> 00:44:49,769
Okay, it's not a
nomination process.
993
00:44:49,770 --> 00:44:52,063
MILES: I'm just...
What I'm saying is, like,
994
00:44:52,064 --> 00:44:55,108
Jessie, you could be,
like, the next Chris Rock.
995
00:44:55,109 --> 00:44:56,776
You know what I mean?
You got that, like, classic
996
00:44:56,777 --> 00:44:59,362
black-comic thing
written all over you.
997
00:44:59,363 --> 00:45:02,449
- Chris Rock?
- Yes. "All eyes on me."
998
00:45:02,450 --> 00:45:04,743
I'm telling you, next
Chris Rock, for real.
999
00:45:04,744 --> 00:45:06,244
More like Chris Pebble.
1000
00:45:06,245 --> 00:45:07,495
[ Miles laughs ]
1001
00:45:07,496 --> 00:45:09,039
See, that's what I'm saying.
1002
00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:10,373
That wasn't even funny.
1003
00:45:10,374 --> 00:45:11,625
You're quick.
1004
00:45:11,626 --> 00:45:13,960
Jessie, like, you know I know
1005
00:45:13,961 --> 00:45:16,296
the Comedy
Central scouts, right?
1006
00:45:16,297 --> 00:45:18,089
I can help you.
1007
00:45:18,090 --> 00:45:20,092
I wa... I want to help you.
1008
00:45:20,635 --> 00:45:23,637
I'm just... I'm just saying,
you're in the right place.
1009
00:45:23,638 --> 00:45:26,640
It's happening, Jessie.
So, like, now's the time.
1010
00:45:26,641 --> 00:45:29,726
I'm saying, like [Imitates
gunshot] pull the trigger.
1011
00:45:29,727 --> 00:45:31,228
JESSIE: Miles, shut the fuck up.
1012
00:45:31,229 --> 00:45:33,188
- What?
- JESSIE: You talk too much.
1013
00:45:33,189 --> 00:45:35,232
That's... That's what
they pay me to do.
1014
00:45:35,233 --> 00:45:38,568
[ Laughs ] You know
they do not pay you.
1015
00:45:38,569 --> 00:45:40,654
MILES: Yeah.
1016
00:45:40,655 --> 00:45:42,823
They be paying me.
1017
00:45:46,202 --> 00:45:48,454
- [ Shower running ]
- [ Laughs ]
1018
00:45:52,250 --> 00:45:55,210
Alright, alright.
1019
00:45:55,211 --> 00:45:59,422
You guys.
1020
00:45:59,423 --> 00:46:02,050
Holy shit, holy shit.
1021
00:46:02,051 --> 00:46:04,135
Triple digits, you guys.
1022
00:46:04,136 --> 00:46:06,638
It's happening, you guys.
1023
00:46:06,639 --> 00:46:08,223
You're following me, you guys.
1024
00:46:08,224 --> 00:46:10,809
Yes, yes, you're watching me.
1025
00:46:10,810 --> 00:46:13,645
Here I am. Hello.
1026
00:46:13,646 --> 00:46:17,232
Oh, see, that wasn't that hard.
1027
00:46:17,233 --> 00:46:19,276
And honestly, guys, thank you.
1028
00:46:19,277 --> 00:46:21,528
Thank you so much for watching,
1029
00:46:21,529 --> 00:46:24,030
all you guys who have
been with me this entire time.
1030
00:46:24,031 --> 00:46:26,032
And guess what. You
will not believe this.
1031
00:46:26,033 --> 00:46:29,160
I just bought tickets...
Up-my-ass prices...
1032
00:46:29,161 --> 00:46:32,580
To the Jessie Adams
comedy show tonight.
1033
00:46:32,581 --> 00:46:35,709
So stay tuned. You guys are
not gonna want to close out.
1034
00:46:35,710 --> 00:46:37,168
Just keep it open all night.
1035
00:46:37,169 --> 00:46:40,046
I promise you guys
will not regret it, okay?
1036
00:46:40,047 --> 00:46:42,299
Hey, I'm feeling
pretty jacked right now.
1037
00:46:42,300 --> 00:46:43,883
You guys want to, I don't know,
1038
00:46:43,884 --> 00:46:46,554
check out my...
Check out my boner?
1039
00:46:51,934 --> 00:46:53,351
I'm just kidding.
1040
00:46:53,352 --> 00:46:55,061
You guys will have to
stick around till the end
1041
00:46:55,062 --> 00:46:56,563
for that piece.
1042
00:46:56,564 --> 00:46:59,149
Hey, and also for all you
BaseCampers out there,
1043
00:46:59,150 --> 00:47:02,027
if you guys are confused,
that's totally chill.
1044
00:47:02,028 --> 00:47:06,240
Welcome to Kurt's World.
This is "The Lesson."
1045
00:47:07,616 --> 00:47:09,576
Sick.
1046
00:47:09,577 --> 00:47:14,123
Oh, oh, my God, guys.
1047
00:47:15,583 --> 00:47:17,835
Bobby's swag cam.
1048
00:47:19,587 --> 00:47:21,755
Do not tell me. He...
1049
00:47:21,756 --> 00:47:23,465
Oh.
1050
00:47:23,466 --> 00:47:25,508
Oh, hell, yeah.
1051
00:47:25,509 --> 00:47:27,552
Alright, BaseCampers,
all you guys out there,
1052
00:47:27,553 --> 00:47:30,263
I know you must be
kind of confused and stuff.
1053
00:47:30,264 --> 00:47:31,890
But do not worry.
Spread the word.
1054
00:47:31,891 --> 00:47:37,645
Because this... this right
here, this is an official takeover.
1055
00:47:37,646 --> 00:47:39,981
Alright, you guys,
I'm redirecting the feed
1056
00:47:39,982 --> 00:47:41,983
- to my channel.
- [ Keyboard clacking ]
1057
00:47:41,984 --> 00:47:44,152
Oh, guys, what's up?
1058
00:47:44,153 --> 00:47:46,988
Hey, guys, hey, guys.
1059
00:47:46,989 --> 00:47:49,532
Honestly, guys, the thing that
I always wondered about is,
1060
00:47:49,533 --> 00:47:52,452
like, if all these swags
are free for Bobby,
1061
00:47:52,453 --> 00:47:55,080
then, like, how do
they know his size?
1062
00:47:55,081 --> 00:47:56,623
Is it just me, or is it, like...
1063
00:47:56,624 --> 00:47:58,541
It must be just pure
guessing game.
1064
00:47:58,542 --> 00:47:59,667
[ Chuckles ]
1065
00:47:59,668 --> 00:48:01,544
[ Cellphone chimes ]
1066
00:48:01,545 --> 00:48:03,129
Fucking dad's texting me.
1067
00:48:03,130 --> 00:48:05,632
- [ Cellphone chimes ]
- Fuck.
1068
00:48:05,633 --> 00:48:07,759
Anyways, tonight's gonna
be crazy with, like, the gun
1069
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:10,470
and killing Jessie Adams,
and I might even wear this...
1070
00:48:10,471 --> 00:48:13,140
- [ Cellphone chimes ]
- Fuck.
1071
00:48:13,849 --> 00:48:16,226
Dad is texting me again.
1072
00:48:16,227 --> 00:48:17,727
[ Cellphone chimes ]
1073
00:48:17,728 --> 00:48:19,479
[ Groans ]
1074
00:48:19,480 --> 00:48:22,982
Okay, this deadbeat is
trying to fuck up "The Lesson."
1075
00:48:22,983 --> 00:48:24,692
Jessie Adams' show
is in like two hours,
1076
00:48:24,693 --> 00:48:26,236
and this douche is texting me
1077
00:48:26,237 --> 00:48:28,321
and he wants me to go to
this deejay show with him.
1078
00:48:28,322 --> 00:48:29,948
- Pbht!
- [ Cellphone chimes ]
1079
00:48:29,949 --> 00:48:33,284
DJ... DJ uNo.
1080
00:48:33,285 --> 00:48:34,995
[ Cellphone chimes ]
1081
00:48:37,665 --> 00:48:40,334
Wait, you guys know who this is?
1082
00:48:41,127 --> 00:48:43,878
What, you guys like DJ uNo?
1083
00:48:43,879 --> 00:48:46,464
Yeah dude. You stupid?
1084
00:48:46,465 --> 00:48:49,927
Take us to uNo right fuckin now.
1085
00:48:51,846 --> 00:48:53,096
It's open.
1086
00:48:53,097 --> 00:48:54,806
It was open.
1087
00:48:54,807 --> 00:48:56,350
Wasn't open.
1088
00:48:57,351 --> 00:48:58,561
KURT: Fucking late.
1089
00:49:00,020 --> 00:49:01,229
Hello, dude.
1090
00:49:01,230 --> 00:49:03,648
Get in the car. I'm in a hurry.
1091
00:49:03,649 --> 00:49:05,191
Plastic? Really?
1092
00:49:05,192 --> 00:49:06,526
KURT: Get in the car.
1093
00:49:06,527 --> 00:49:08,154
Such a rookie move.
1094
00:49:11,198 --> 00:49:12,574
Thanks for the ride.
1095
00:49:12,575 --> 00:49:15,201
You're really coming
through in the clutch.
1096
00:49:15,202 --> 00:49:18,163
Whoa, you're not
gonna let your dad
1097
00:49:18,164 --> 00:49:19,873
get his fucking
seat belt on, bro?
1098
00:49:19,874 --> 00:49:22,125
KURT: Sorry, we don't have
time, and I'm charging you.
1099
00:49:22,126 --> 00:49:24,252
Go on your Spree
app and request a ride.
1100
00:49:24,253 --> 00:49:26,880
- What?
- Do you think this is for free?
1101
00:49:26,881 --> 00:49:29,007
Seriously? [ Scoffs ]
1102
00:49:29,008 --> 00:49:30,383
Can you imagine me charging you
1103
00:49:30,384 --> 00:49:32,719
for every meal I
fucking gave you?
1104
00:49:32,720 --> 00:49:34,762
I wonder what that
would account to.
1105
00:49:34,763 --> 00:49:36,181
One cheeseburger?
1106
00:49:36,182 --> 00:49:38,725
Because Mom pretty much
took care of everything.
1107
00:49:38,726 --> 00:49:40,518
Ohhh.
1108
00:49:40,519 --> 00:49:43,938
So you want to get into details
about me and your mother?
1109
00:49:43,939 --> 00:49:46,733
Because I got fucking details
1110
00:49:46,734 --> 00:49:49,612
we can get into about
me and your mother.
1111
00:49:52,573 --> 00:49:55,743
I like the fucking
cameras and the lights.
1112
00:49:56,660 --> 00:49:58,078
Action.
1113
00:49:59,163 --> 00:50:01,372
Do they change color?
1114
00:50:01,373 --> 00:50:02,249
No.
1115
00:50:02,250 --> 00:50:03,750
Well, they should.
1116
00:50:03,751 --> 00:50:05,001
Red light.
1117
00:50:05,002 --> 00:50:07,003
What the fuck?
1118
00:50:07,004 --> 00:50:09,672
What the fuck is that?
1119
00:50:09,673 --> 00:50:11,383
Dumbass.
1120
00:50:12,760 --> 00:50:14,719
[ Coughs ]
1121
00:50:14,720 --> 00:50:15,762
Fuck this.
1122
00:50:15,763 --> 00:50:18,389
Hey, hey, hey, what the fuck?
1123
00:50:18,390 --> 00:50:19,891
What the fuck was that?
1124
00:50:19,892 --> 00:50:22,644
The BPAs, bro, they're not good.
1125
00:50:22,645 --> 00:50:26,231
The BPA from the plastic
seeps into the water.
1126
00:50:26,232 --> 00:50:29,442
You're gonna get fucking
estrogen in your testes.
1127
00:50:29,443 --> 00:50:33,279
I'm getting a lot of anti-BPA
activism on my networks.
1128
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:35,448
- On your networks?
- Yeah, on my networks.
1129
00:50:35,449 --> 00:50:36,492
Oh.
1130
00:50:37,785 --> 00:50:40,161
Where's that mixtape
we made of those beats?
1131
00:50:40,162 --> 00:50:41,413
I don't know.
1132
00:50:41,956 --> 00:50:44,165
What the fuck is this?!
1133
00:50:44,166 --> 00:50:45,584
It's a fucking gun.
1134
00:50:46,126 --> 00:50:49,128
Kurt, Kurt, I told
you about guns,
1135
00:50:49,129 --> 00:50:51,673
- me and guns, all my stories.
- I know.
1136
00:50:51,674 --> 00:50:54,842
I thought we were on the same
page about gun control, Kurt.
1137
00:50:54,843 --> 00:50:56,344
Listen, I have a gun, alright.
1138
00:50:56,345 --> 00:50:59,389
- I'm smart, unlike you, okay?
- That's crazy.
1139
00:50:59,390 --> 00:51:00,640
No, it's not crazy.
1140
00:51:00,641 --> 00:51:02,267
You're gonna
fuckin' kill yourself.
1141
00:51:02,268 --> 00:51:04,018
No, you don't know
what this job's like.
1142
00:51:04,019 --> 00:51:05,812
- Put that fucking gun away.
- You don't know... No.
1143
00:51:05,813 --> 00:51:08,648
You don't know what
type of thug or gangbanger
1144
00:51:08,649 --> 00:51:10,024
is gonna get in
the back of my car.
1145
00:51:10,025 --> 00:51:11,359
KRIS: Kurt, Kurt, Kurt, Kurt.
1146
00:51:11,360 --> 00:51:14,070
There's a police officer.
Put away your gun.
1147
00:51:14,071 --> 00:51:15,655
Put it down. Put it
down. Put it down.
1148
00:51:15,656 --> 00:51:17,407
It's my fucking gun.
I use it for safety.
1149
00:51:17,408 --> 00:51:18,659
Kurt, Kurt, Kurt, the...
1150
00:51:19,994 --> 00:51:21,869
The police officer. Oh, my God.
1151
00:51:21,870 --> 00:51:24,998
[ Siren wailing ]
1152
00:51:24,999 --> 00:51:26,625
Ah.
1153
00:51:30,004 --> 00:51:31,713
Why do you have a gun?
1154
00:51:31,714 --> 00:51:33,214
What the fuck?
1155
00:51:33,215 --> 00:51:34,882
Another red light.
And a fucking gun.
1156
00:51:34,883 --> 00:51:38,678
Why are you fiending through
my shit anyway, you junkie?
1157
00:51:38,679 --> 00:51:40,471
Kurt, amigo.
1158
00:51:40,472 --> 00:51:43,851
Are you trying to downgrade
my confidence before my set?
1159
00:51:44,727 --> 00:51:48,062
Well, yeah, I found
your baggies today.
1160
00:51:48,063 --> 00:51:49,772
Wait, what?
1161
00:51:49,773 --> 00:51:52,567
Yeah, I was helping Mom
move some shit for the house.
1162
00:51:52,568 --> 00:51:54,902
And behind a dresser,
shoved in the wall,
1163
00:51:54,903 --> 00:51:56,195
there were your baggies.
1164
00:51:56,196 --> 00:51:57,530
Yeah, you must have
been so fucking high
1165
00:51:57,531 --> 00:51:59,198
that you put them
there and then you just,
1166
00:51:59,199 --> 00:52:01,243
I don't know, must
have forgotten.
1167
00:52:03,537 --> 00:52:05,038
Classic.
1168
00:52:05,039 --> 00:52:07,373
KRIS: Come on, Kurt.
Can we just have some fun?
1169
00:52:07,374 --> 00:52:09,250
Some real fucking fun.
1170
00:52:09,251 --> 00:52:14,088
Not, like, an unboxing
tutorial video fun.
1171
00:52:14,089 --> 00:52:15,965
Real fun.
1172
00:52:15,966 --> 00:52:18,676
If you don't rock out with
your fucking cock out tonight,
1173
00:52:18,677 --> 00:52:22,430
uNo is never gonna tag
you on her socials, alright?
1174
00:52:22,431 --> 00:52:27,477
You better get a
personality pronto, dude.
1175
00:52:27,478 --> 00:52:32,107
'Cause right now, Kurt's
World is fucking wack.
1176
00:52:32,733 --> 00:52:36,611
Yo, we're at Club Dirt,
calm before the storm.
1177
00:52:36,612 --> 00:52:38,404
Tell all your friends
get down here.
1178
00:52:38,405 --> 00:52:40,698
We got bottle service.
1179
00:52:40,699 --> 00:52:43,661
We got Winston and
Bernardo in the house.
1180
00:52:44,745 --> 00:52:45,745
Yeah.
1181
00:52:45,746 --> 00:52:48,456
Here he is. Here's my boy.
1182
00:52:48,457 --> 00:52:50,375
What do you
think? It's nice, huh?
1183
00:52:50,376 --> 00:52:53,294
Uh, breaking news,
Dad. This is a strip club.
1184
00:52:53,295 --> 00:52:55,505
This is not a dance club.
1185
00:52:55,506 --> 00:52:57,256
Well, you know, they
gave me a residency.
1186
00:52:57,257 --> 00:53:00,760
Every other Friday, so I'm not
gonna look a gift in the mouth.
1187
00:53:00,761 --> 00:53:02,929
KURT: I don't care,
Dad. How about I'm clear?
1188
00:53:02,930 --> 00:53:05,348
This place feels sad to me.
1189
00:53:05,349 --> 00:53:08,017
Oh, yeah, all the empty poles.
1190
00:53:08,018 --> 00:53:10,728
- KURT: That's not what I mean.
- It is sad.
1191
00:53:10,729 --> 00:53:13,606
But it costs more
to get girls here.
1192
00:53:13,607 --> 00:53:15,191
It's gonna be fun. Come on, bro.
1193
00:53:15,192 --> 00:53:16,442
KURT: St-Stop. Where's uNo?
1194
00:53:16,443 --> 00:53:18,987
[ Speaking native language ]
1195
00:53:19,738 --> 00:53:22,281
- KURT: Just be fucking cool.
- Brittany.
1196
00:53:22,282 --> 00:53:23,992
KURT: That is my hat.
1197
00:53:24,660 --> 00:53:26,953
[ Speaking native language ]
1198
00:53:26,954 --> 00:53:29,038
KURT: You can't...
I don't think you...
1199
00:53:29,039 --> 00:53:32,125
Hey, uNo. Hi.
1200
00:53:32,126 --> 00:53:33,209
Okay.
1201
00:53:33,210 --> 00:53:36,505
[ Speaking native language ]
1202
00:53:39,967 --> 00:53:40,967
[ Smooching ]
1203
00:53:40,968 --> 00:53:42,135
[ Chuckles ]
1204
00:53:42,136 --> 00:53:43,428
"Follow me."
1205
00:53:43,429 --> 00:53:45,347
Her necklace says "Follow me."
1206
00:53:45,931 --> 00:53:47,223
Hey, uNo.
1207
00:53:47,224 --> 00:53:48,474
Thank you so much.
1208
00:53:48,475 --> 00:53:50,059
You know, Kris. Remember?
1209
00:53:50,060 --> 00:53:52,228
This is my son, Kurt.
He's a big fan of yours.
1210
00:53:52,229 --> 00:53:53,479
KURT: What's up?
I'm a musician, too.
1211
00:53:53,480 --> 00:53:54,772
And I just also
want to say to you,
1212
00:53:54,773 --> 00:53:57,024
congratulations on
all your followers.
1213
00:53:57,025 --> 00:54:00,570
He'd love it if you
tagged him on your social.
1214
00:54:00,571 --> 00:54:02,155
- He's...
- Oh, no, no offense,
1215
00:54:02,156 --> 00:54:05,658
but I cannot do that on the
same night as a deejay set.
1216
00:54:05,659 --> 00:54:06,577
Oh, okay.
1217
00:54:06,578 --> 00:54:08,286
Sorry, bro. We tried.
1218
00:54:08,287 --> 00:54:10,288
- It was nice, though.
- KURT: Hey, listen, uNo.
1219
00:54:10,289 --> 00:54:14,041
Uh, influencer to influencer,
and I know it's a huge ask,
1220
00:54:14,042 --> 00:54:16,002
but if you could just, like,
pop me onto your story,
1221
00:54:16,003 --> 00:54:18,463
I got a huge audience
watching right now.
1222
00:54:18,464 --> 00:54:21,507
And everybody loves you,
and it would just be huge.
1223
00:54:21,508 --> 00:54:23,384
- You are live right now?
- KURT: I'm live.
1224
00:54:23,385 --> 00:54:25,094
I actually have a
brand that could go viral,
1225
00:54:25,095 --> 00:54:27,263
and you would really
push me over the edge.
1226
00:54:27,264 --> 00:54:28,598
- What do you think?
- Okay.
1227
00:54:28,599 --> 00:54:30,516
KURT: Yeah? You
don't... You don't mind?
1228
00:54:30,517 --> 00:54:32,268
What's your name?
1229
00:54:32,269 --> 00:54:34,729
KURT: It's KurtsWorld96.
1230
00:54:34,730 --> 00:54:38,232
Okay? Say hi to everyone.
1231
00:54:38,233 --> 00:54:40,276
Hi.
1232
00:54:40,277 --> 00:54:41,444
- KURT: Sick.
- KRIS: Dope, dope.
1233
00:54:41,445 --> 00:54:43,529
Okay, 90...
1234
00:54:43,530 --> 00:54:46,365
KURT: 96. K-U-R-T-S-W-O-R-L-D.
1235
00:54:46,366 --> 00:54:48,242
- Got it, got it, got it.
- KURT: Okay.
1236
00:54:48,243 --> 00:54:49,243
- Got it.
- Yeah.
1237
00:54:49,244 --> 00:54:50,787
Kurt got got.
1238
00:54:50,788 --> 00:54:53,289
And just to let you know,
uNo, I still haven't gotten...
1239
00:54:53,290 --> 00:54:56,042
Hey, why is the
Club Dirt so empty?
1240
00:54:56,043 --> 00:54:58,377
The promoter's not
working hard enough?
1241
00:54:58,378 --> 00:55:00,046
Oh, no, no, no, no.
1242
00:55:00,047 --> 00:55:02,673
They'll start coming in
about halfway through my set.
1243
00:55:02,674 --> 00:55:05,343
They just... They come
out late sometimes.
1244
00:55:05,344 --> 00:55:06,719
- You know.
- Yeah.
1245
00:55:06,720 --> 00:55:08,888
But there'll be plenty
of people for you.
1246
00:55:08,889 --> 00:55:11,724
And I still haven't gotten
that notification quite yet.
1247
00:55:11,725 --> 00:55:14,310
So when that goes through,
though, I will let you know.
1248
00:55:14,311 --> 00:55:16,730
It's alright. You tried, bro.
1249
00:55:19,233 --> 00:55:21,901
She ain't gonna tag
u bro. She lyin. LUL.
1250
00:55:21,902 --> 00:55:23,569
KRIS: How do you
like Los Angeles?
1251
00:55:23,570 --> 00:55:25,363
UNO: Yeah, it's good.
1252
00:55:25,364 --> 00:55:27,323
Do you know where is taco truck?
1253
00:55:27,324 --> 00:55:29,242
Honestly, you guys?
1254
00:55:29,243 --> 00:55:32,078
You guys fucking suck,
and I predicted this.
1255
00:55:32,079 --> 00:55:34,914
-Oh, come on, Kurt. Sorry
-Have a good night, honestly.
1256
00:55:34,915 --> 00:55:37,792
You guys don't know how
much... Important this day is to me.
1257
00:55:37,793 --> 00:55:39,377
I don't know what to say, guys.
1258
00:55:39,378 --> 00:55:41,671
Bobby cam is canceled
because it was not lucky to me.
1259
00:55:41,672 --> 00:55:45,550
And honestly, you
guys led me astray.
1260
00:55:45,551 --> 00:55:48,094
Let's just move on. I'm
not angry at anybody.
1261
00:55:48,095 --> 00:55:49,136
I don't have to harbor a...
1262
00:55:49,137 --> 00:55:50,639
[ Knock on window ]
1263
00:55:52,724 --> 00:55:54,517
UNo?
1264
00:55:54,518 --> 00:55:56,769
Oh, do you know
where something is?
1265
00:55:56,770 --> 00:55:58,646
KURT: Uh, do I know
where something is?
1266
00:55:58,647 --> 00:56:00,940
Oh, you know Los
Angeles taco truck?
1267
00:56:00,941 --> 00:56:02,859
There... There's a lot of
taco trucks in Los Angeles.
1268
00:56:02,860 --> 00:56:06,571
Okay, take me
to L.A. taco truck.
1269
00:56:06,572 --> 00:56:08,531
- And I will tag you, really.
- What time...
1270
00:56:08,532 --> 00:56:10,449
I'm kind of in a
hurry? What time is it?
1271
00:56:10,450 --> 00:56:11,993
I don't know.
1272
00:56:11,994 --> 00:56:14,203
- I mean, what do you...
- Okay, I'm in a hurry, too.
1273
00:56:14,204 --> 00:56:17,416
Need to take pictures
at L.A. taco truck.
1274
00:56:20,127 --> 00:56:22,504
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
1275
00:56:24,423 --> 00:56:26,925
- KURT: Okay, are we good?
- UNO: No.
1276
00:56:30,679 --> 00:56:32,848
- [ Camera shutter clicks ]
- Okay.
1277
00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:35,641
KURT: Alright, cool.
1278
00:56:35,642 --> 00:56:37,685
Great. Okay, want
to get some food?
1279
00:56:37,686 --> 00:56:40,022
- UNO: Yeah.
- KURT: Okay.
1280
00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:43,775
Well, hey, what are you doing?
1281
00:56:45,819 --> 00:56:47,528
You don't want to come?
1282
00:56:47,529 --> 00:56:50,489
I don't want to
wait line. You go.
1283
00:56:50,490 --> 00:56:52,491
Me? Okay.
1284
00:56:52,492 --> 00:56:53,868
What do you want?
1285
00:56:53,869 --> 00:56:56,245
Just, like, a... Like, a
carne asada burrito?
1286
00:56:56,246 --> 00:56:58,832
Get me most famous.
1287
00:56:59,499 --> 00:57:01,375
What does that
mean? Like, nachos or...
1288
00:57:01,376 --> 00:57:02,668
Get me most famous.
1289
00:57:02,669 --> 00:57:04,003
Okay, then you're
gonna tag me, right?
1290
00:57:04,004 --> 00:57:05,713
You're gonna tag me after that?
1291
00:57:05,714 --> 00:57:08,132
- Yes, I already make a promise.
- Okay, I know.
1292
00:57:08,133 --> 00:57:10,843
I'm just checking because
you can't always count...
1293
00:57:10,844 --> 00:57:12,179
I told...
1294
00:57:19,186 --> 00:57:21,687
Hey, I'm... I'm sorry.
Hey, do you know...
1295
00:57:21,688 --> 00:57:24,649
Do you know what, like...
What's the thing to get?
1296
00:57:24,650 --> 00:57:26,108
I'm not sure.
It's my first time.
1297
00:57:26,109 --> 00:57:28,527
KURT: Okay, yeah.
Me too, me too.
1298
00:57:28,528 --> 00:57:30,154
Yeah. It's... Yeah, I heard...
1299
00:57:30,155 --> 00:57:34,534
But I've heard the carne
asada fries frigging slap.
1300
00:57:35,994 --> 00:57:39,164
You want... Say something.
1301
00:57:39,831 --> 00:57:43,542
You got a lot of people
looking at the back of your head.
1302
00:57:43,543 --> 00:57:45,086
[ Chuckles ]
1303
00:57:45,087 --> 00:57:48,005
Hey, everyone, my
name's Daisy, and I'm 23.
1304
00:57:48,006 --> 00:57:50,591
KURT: Whoa. I'm
23. That's crazy.
1305
00:57:50,592 --> 00:57:52,927
That's, like... That's,
like, fate, right.
1306
00:57:52,928 --> 00:57:55,012
- So you're a streamer?
- KURT: Bull's-eye, yeah.
1307
00:57:55,013 --> 00:57:57,181
I'm actually... I'm
here with a deejay.
1308
00:57:57,182 --> 00:57:59,767
A Korean... Yeah,
she's a Korean deejay.
1309
00:57:59,768 --> 00:58:01,060
- Where?
- KURT: She's in the car.
1310
00:58:01,061 --> 00:58:02,436
She just keeps it
on the down-low.
1311
00:58:02,437 --> 00:58:03,729
She's famous.
1312
00:58:03,730 --> 00:58:05,940
She actually got
famous from a sex tape.
1313
00:58:05,941 --> 00:58:08,109
But, yeah, it's like... It's
like I have experience.
1314
00:58:08,110 --> 00:58:11,195
Like, I've... Like, I've done
some, like, sex tapes myself.
1315
00:58:11,196 --> 00:58:13,072
And it's like when I
put them out there,
1316
00:58:13,073 --> 00:58:14,573
I always feel like
I have a real, like,
1317
00:58:14,574 --> 00:58:16,075
huge boom in my numbers.
1318
00:58:16,076 --> 00:58:18,077
It's like I could, like, make
a sex tape at any time.
1319
00:58:18,078 --> 00:58:20,705
I could feel like I'm
making a sex tape tonight.
1320
00:58:20,706 --> 00:58:22,581
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
1321
00:58:22,582 --> 00:58:24,000
You get what I'm saying?
1322
00:58:24,001 --> 00:58:25,668
- [ Camera shutter clicks ]
- I'm just gonna go.
1323
00:58:25,669 --> 00:58:27,086
KURT: Okay, yeah, that's cool.
1324
00:58:27,087 --> 00:58:30,131
DAISY: Hi. One carne
asada burrito, please.
1325
00:58:30,132 --> 00:58:31,757
- WOMAN: $4.25.
- Also, like, if...
1326
00:58:31,758 --> 00:58:33,300
If you want to hang at
the Jessie Adams show,
1327
00:58:33,301 --> 00:58:37,596
like, you... you know... You
know who's gonna be there.
1328
00:58:37,597 --> 00:58:40,266
- You... You are?
- Yeah.
1329
00:58:40,267 --> 00:58:42,518
Fuck Daisy right now!
1330
00:58:42,519 --> 00:58:43,728
Kurt's World.
1331
00:58:43,729 --> 00:58:45,146
WOMAN: Thank
you. Muchas gracias.
1332
00:58:45,147 --> 00:58:46,981
- DAISY: Alright.
- KURT: Think about it.
1333
00:58:46,982 --> 00:58:48,566
- DAISY: Have fun at the show.
- KURT: Yeah, see you later.
1334
00:58:48,567 --> 00:58:50,943
Okay, bye-bye. Kurt's World.
1335
00:58:50,944 --> 00:58:54,238
Hey, four tacos with each meat.
1336
00:58:54,239 --> 00:58:56,782
And then the carne
asada fries, please.
1337
00:58:56,783 --> 00:58:58,617
- Ahh!
- WOMAN: How many fries?
1338
00:58:58,618 --> 00:59:00,037
Just one. Thank you.
1339
00:59:01,496 --> 00:59:03,330
- Ahh.
- [ Can tab opens ]
1340
00:59:03,331 --> 00:59:05,124
I'm gonna drink some of this.
1341
00:59:05,125 --> 00:59:07,878
- [ Slurps ]
- [ Coughing ]
1342
00:59:12,215 --> 00:59:15,927
You're the worst
streamer of all time.
1343
00:59:17,429 --> 00:59:19,222
Alright, get... get in the...
1344
00:59:24,811 --> 00:59:26,980
[ Police radio chatter ]
1345
00:59:36,615 --> 00:59:38,158
[ Window whirs ]
1346
00:59:39,576 --> 00:59:40,827
[ Bottle thuds, window whirs ]
1347
00:59:42,829 --> 00:59:44,914
OFFICER: Fuck's this guy doing?
1348
00:59:44,915 --> 00:59:46,999
Friday nights. You
got to love them.
1349
00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:49,502
Hi. What's up guys?
1350
00:59:49,503 --> 00:59:51,171
It's... It's Kurt.
1351
00:59:52,506 --> 00:59:54,840
Welcome to Kurt's World.
1352
00:59:54,841 --> 00:59:58,094
- Want to check it out?
- Yeah.
1353
00:59:58,095 --> 01:00:00,513
UNo asked me to do a takeover.
1354
01:00:00,514 --> 01:00:02,015
So that's what's up.
1355
01:00:03,767 --> 01:00:05,268
[ Knock on window ]
1356
01:00:06,853 --> 01:00:08,979
[ Window whirring ]
1357
01:00:08,980 --> 01:00:11,357
- Hey, can I help you, Officer?
- Yeah, everything alright today?
1358
01:00:11,358 --> 01:00:14,193
- Uh, we've seen better nights.
- Mm-hmm.
1359
01:00:14,194 --> 01:00:16,112
My girlfriend, she had a
little bit too much to drink.
1360
01:00:16,113 --> 01:00:18,697
I pulled over.
It's not a big deal.
1361
01:00:18,698 --> 01:00:20,366
She's okay, you know.
1362
01:00:20,367 --> 01:00:22,785
I'm just giving her some food,
sober her up, get her home.
1363
01:00:22,786 --> 01:00:24,703
OFFICER: License
and registration, please.
1364
01:00:24,704 --> 01:00:26,665
Of course. Uh...
1365
01:00:29,668 --> 01:00:32,379
- She's just sleeping.
- Mm-hmm.
1366
01:00:33,380 --> 01:00:34,713
You a Spree driver?
1367
01:00:34,714 --> 01:00:36,715
Uh, yeah, yeah.
1368
01:00:36,716 --> 01:00:39,135
Uh, yeah, not...
Not tonight, though.
1369
01:00:39,136 --> 01:00:42,054
No, no, I'm just hanging...
Just hanging with my girl, yeah.
1370
01:00:42,055 --> 01:00:44,349
OFFICER: But you
have driven today?
1371
01:00:45,183 --> 01:00:47,601
No, I-I don't... I don't
work on weekends.
1372
01:00:47,602 --> 01:00:51,063
OFFICER: [ Chuckles ] Friday's
a weekday, last I checked.
1373
01:00:51,064 --> 01:00:53,858
Alright, Kurt, can I have
you step out the car slowly
1374
01:00:53,859 --> 01:00:55,442
and show us both
your hands, please?
1375
01:00:55,443 --> 01:00:58,112
- Is that necessary?
- OFFICER: Yes, sir, it is.
1376
01:00:58,113 --> 01:01:00,157
Kurt, please step
out the car, please.
1377
01:01:01,825 --> 01:01:04,743
Okay, that's not good, buddy.
1378
01:01:04,744 --> 01:01:06,662
I just close it?
1379
01:01:06,663 --> 01:01:08,164
OFFICER: Yeah, go ahead.
1380
01:01:08,165 --> 01:01:10,124
Just go ahead and
stand in front of the car.
1381
01:01:10,125 --> 01:01:11,959
- Sorry.
- Yeah, don't worry about it.
1382
01:01:11,960 --> 01:01:13,586
We're gonna do a
standard sobriety test here.
1383
01:01:13,587 --> 01:01:16,088
So I'm gonna need you to
stand with your feet together
1384
01:01:16,089 --> 01:01:17,715
and your arms to your
side like this, please.
1385
01:01:17,716 --> 01:01:20,426
And when we start, I'm gonna
ask you to lift your right foot,
1386
01:01:20,427 --> 01:01:22,136
point your toe,
and count like this.
1387
01:01:22,137 --> 01:01:23,888
One, one thousand,
two, one thousand,
1388
01:01:23,889 --> 01:01:25,556
three, one thousand,
four, one thousand.
1389
01:01:25,557 --> 01:01:28,100
- Alright?
- Let's go, buddy.
1390
01:01:28,101 --> 01:01:30,436
One, one thousand,
two, one thousand,
1391
01:01:30,437 --> 01:01:31,937
three, one thousand,
1392
01:01:31,938 --> 01:01:34,106
four... four, one thousand,
five, one thousand.
1393
01:01:34,107 --> 01:01:35,941
OFFICER: Should we
make him touch his nose?
1394
01:01:35,942 --> 01:01:37,026
- Jake, shut up.
- KURT: Seven, one thousand,
1395
01:01:37,027 --> 01:01:38,277
eight, one thousand.
1396
01:01:38,278 --> 01:01:40,446
Hey, your
girlfriend's pretty hot.
1397
01:01:40,447 --> 01:01:42,740
- KURT: Eleven, one thousand.
- [ Gasps ]
1398
01:01:42,741 --> 01:01:45,284
- She's awake now.
- What the fu...
1399
01:01:45,285 --> 01:01:46,493
[ Gunshot ]
1400
01:01:46,494 --> 01:01:48,621
Jesus fucking Christ.
1401
01:01:48,622 --> 01:01:50,040
[ People screaming ]
1402
01:01:53,627 --> 01:01:56,670
Officer down. I need backup.
1403
01:01:56,671 --> 01:01:59,966
[ Siren wailing in distance ]
1404
01:02:00,759 --> 01:02:02,344
KURT: Thank you, God.
1405
01:02:07,307 --> 01:02:10,976
WOMAN: Any units in the vicinity
of 105 westbound at Inglewood.
1406
01:02:10,977 --> 01:02:13,021
[ Siren wailing ]
1407
01:02:18,235 --> 01:02:20,111
Oh, fuck.
1408
01:02:21,488 --> 01:02:23,406
[ Horns honking ]
1409
01:02:25,825 --> 01:02:27,576
[ Laughs ] Whoa.
1410
01:02:27,577 --> 01:02:29,370
[ Tires screech ] Whoa.
1411
01:02:29,371 --> 01:02:32,791
[ Police radio chatter ]
1412
01:02:34,292 --> 01:02:36,168
- What is he doing?
- Tell me you got that.
1413
01:02:36,169 --> 01:02:37,753
- I got that. I got that.
- Did you get that?
1414
01:02:37,754 --> 01:02:40,256
If you guys had told me
that this is what "The Lesson"
1415
01:02:40,257 --> 01:02:41,882
would be like before,
I would have n...
1416
01:02:41,883 --> 01:02:43,759
I could have
never believed that.
1417
01:02:43,760 --> 01:02:46,012
This is crazy.
1418
01:02:47,931 --> 01:02:49,808
[ Sirens wailing ]
1419
01:02:56,523 --> 01:02:58,649
[ Horns honking ]
1420
01:02:58,650 --> 01:03:00,859
- Oh, my God.
- Whoa.
1421
01:03:00,860 --> 01:03:02,152
[ Police radio chatter ]
1422
01:03:02,153 --> 01:03:04,363
KURT: I got to lose these cops.
1423
01:03:04,364 --> 01:03:07,616
[ Tires screeching ]
1424
01:03:07,617 --> 01:03:09,035
[ Thudding ]
1425
01:03:19,379 --> 01:03:22,589
Do... Are you seeing all
these homeless people?
1426
01:03:22,590 --> 01:03:23,632
It's pathetic.
1427
01:03:23,633 --> 01:03:25,676
[ Horn honking ]
1428
01:03:25,677 --> 01:03:28,220
Zero social-media presence.
1429
01:03:28,221 --> 01:03:30,264
They don't even care
that the whole world
1430
01:03:30,265 --> 01:03:32,224
doesn't even know
that they exist.
1431
01:03:32,225 --> 01:03:34,059
If I ran over their tent
and killed them all,
1432
01:03:34,060 --> 01:03:35,979
no one would
even care right now.
1433
01:03:37,147 --> 01:03:38,397
Yes.
1434
01:03:38,398 --> 01:03:39,773
Cops can't stop me.
1435
01:03:39,774 --> 01:03:41,150
Dad can't stop me.
1436
01:03:41,151 --> 01:03:42,568
Mom can't stop me.
1437
01:03:42,569 --> 01:03:43,736
Bobby can't stop me.
1438
01:03:43,737 --> 01:03:45,738
The homeless can't stop me.
1439
01:03:45,739 --> 01:03:47,031
What's up?
1440
01:03:47,032 --> 01:03:49,993
Guys, I'm starting
to feel unstoppable.
1441
01:04:01,713 --> 01:04:03,088
[ Laughter ]
1442
01:04:03,089 --> 01:04:06,008
Pumpkin emoji, pumpkin
emoji, pumpkin emoji.
1443
01:04:06,009 --> 01:04:07,426
Birthday hat emoji.
1444
01:04:07,427 --> 01:04:09,219
I just think... I think
it's all fucking...
1445
01:04:09,220 --> 01:04:11,930
I this it's like... I think parents
are doing it on purpose.
1446
01:04:11,931 --> 01:04:13,265
You have to call them.
1447
01:04:13,266 --> 01:04:14,933
You have to call
them to figure it out.
1448
01:04:14,934 --> 01:04:17,311
That's what they're... It's like
all they want is a phone call.
1449
01:04:17,312 --> 01:04:20,397
So they send you these
weird-ass coded text messages.
1450
01:04:20,398 --> 01:04:23,692
It's like, "You're getting
the phone call, Mom."
1451
01:04:23,693 --> 01:04:25,612
[ Light laughter ]
1452
01:04:28,490 --> 01:04:31,075
Fucking porn is crazy.
1453
01:04:31,076 --> 01:04:33,118
You know, I always
think about, like,
1454
01:04:33,119 --> 01:04:36,622
who are these people who
are, like, commenting on porn?
1455
01:04:36,623 --> 01:04:38,290
Do you know what I mean?
1456
01:04:38,291 --> 01:04:40,959
Like, they've got to,
like, fucking, like, sign up
1457
01:04:40,960 --> 01:04:43,295
to be like, "Who's she?
1458
01:04:43,296 --> 01:04:45,839
Where is this place?
I like this apartment."
1459
01:04:45,840 --> 01:04:50,302
I think it's bad that I fucking
beat off to this shit so much.
1460
01:04:50,303 --> 01:04:54,265
But I don't have a
profile. It's just porn.
1461
01:04:56,226 --> 01:04:57,644
MAN: Where's Jessie?
1462
01:04:58,770 --> 01:05:01,397
Alright, well, I guess
that's enough about me.
1463
01:05:01,398 --> 01:05:03,107
WOMAN: All eyes on me!
1464
01:05:03,108 --> 01:05:07,319
What do you say we bring up
our final performer of the night?
1465
01:05:07,320 --> 01:05:09,322
[ Cheers and applause ]
1466
01:05:10,407 --> 01:05:11,865
You know her.
1467
01:05:11,866 --> 01:05:14,660
Her holiness of hashtags.
1468
01:05:14,661 --> 01:05:17,788
The reaper of reposts.
1469
01:05:17,789 --> 01:05:20,249
The queen of all social media.
1470
01:05:20,250 --> 01:05:23,168
She's the reason you
guys bought your tickets
1471
01:05:23,169 --> 01:05:25,254
three weeks in
advance, I'm sure.
1472
01:05:25,255 --> 01:05:28,632
Please welcome the amazing,
1473
01:05:28,633 --> 01:05:33,512
the sexy, the hilarious
Jessie fucking Adams.
1474
01:05:33,513 --> 01:05:34,638
Give it up.
1475
01:05:34,639 --> 01:05:35,682
[ Cheers and applause ]
1476
01:05:41,479 --> 01:05:43,523
Hello, everyone.
1477
01:05:44,649 --> 01:05:47,901
Thank you, thank
you. Thank you, Miles.
1478
01:05:47,902 --> 01:05:49,778
Wow, what you
lack in personality
1479
01:05:49,779 --> 01:05:51,613
you really make up for in puns.
1480
01:05:51,614 --> 01:05:52,823
[ Laughter ]
1481
01:05:52,824 --> 01:05:55,576
Give it up for white guys, huh?
1482
01:05:55,577 --> 01:05:57,828
Yeah.
1483
01:05:57,829 --> 01:05:59,204
Can't live with them,
1484
01:05:59,205 --> 01:06:02,040
and, well, there they
are all over the place.
1485
01:06:02,041 --> 01:06:05,461
I'm so glad you think I'm
hilarious and sexy, Miles.
1486
01:06:05,462 --> 01:06:07,963
Thank you. That means
a lot coming from a guy
1487
01:06:07,964 --> 01:06:11,091
whose ideal woman
is a hentai body pillow.
1488
01:06:11,092 --> 01:06:12,634
[ Laughter ]
1489
01:06:12,635 --> 01:06:15,929
Let's redirect back to
me. This is my show.
1490
01:06:15,930 --> 01:06:19,141
And I am the real Jessie Adams.
1491
01:06:19,142 --> 01:06:21,143
[ Cheers and applause ]
1492
01:06:21,144 --> 01:06:24,855
We got the Joke Bros in
the house from Chicago.
1493
01:06:24,856 --> 01:06:26,816
Hell, yeah.
1494
01:06:27,650 --> 01:06:31,695
Yeah, we're going out live to a
million neck beards right now.
1495
01:06:31,696 --> 01:06:35,407
Wow, such a big
show, so many eyeballs.
1496
01:06:35,408 --> 01:06:37,701
I should probably
play it safe, right?
1497
01:06:37,702 --> 01:06:38,994
- CROWD: No.
- No?
1498
01:06:38,995 --> 01:06:40,829
You don't want
me to play it safe?
1499
01:06:40,830 --> 01:06:45,210
I mean, why would I? I
am the real Jessie Adams.
1500
01:06:45,919 --> 01:06:48,545
- Are you ready?
- Yeah.
1501
01:06:48,546 --> 01:06:51,256
All eyes on me. I
want to be seen.
1502
01:06:51,257 --> 01:06:53,509
CROWD: All eyes on
me I want to be seen.
1503
01:06:53,510 --> 01:06:56,512
I said, all eyes on
me I want to be seen.
1504
01:06:56,513 --> 01:06:58,555
ALL: All eyes on
me I want to be seen.
1505
01:06:58,556 --> 01:07:01,433
JESSIE: Great. Get your
phones out like we do every time.
1506
01:07:01,434 --> 01:07:03,310
This is our
favorite part, right?
1507
01:07:03,311 --> 01:07:07,273
You trying to see me?
You trying to see me?
1508
01:07:07,941 --> 01:07:10,192
You got me in focus?
1509
01:07:10,193 --> 01:07:12,236
You got me in that good light?
1510
01:07:12,237 --> 01:07:13,570
WOMAN: I got you.
1511
01:07:13,571 --> 01:07:14,821
Do I look good?
1512
01:07:14,822 --> 01:07:16,698
Thank you, baby.
1513
01:07:16,699 --> 01:07:18,617
So if you follow
me on social media,
1514
01:07:18,618 --> 01:07:21,119
you probably know I had
to put some skeezy bozo
1515
01:07:21,120 --> 01:07:23,789
in his place during
a Spree ride today.
1516
01:07:23,790 --> 01:07:24,957
He was the one who was all like,
1517
01:07:24,958 --> 01:07:26,625
"Come on, girl,
give me a smile."
1518
01:07:26,626 --> 01:07:30,045
Ugh. I mean, that's not breaking
news to any woman in this room.
1519
01:07:30,046 --> 01:07:31,463
We go through that every day.
1520
01:07:31,464 --> 01:07:33,674
- WOMAN: Fuck that guy.
- Right? Fuck that guy.
1521
01:07:33,675 --> 01:07:36,802
He was a date-rape
drug in a person.
1522
01:07:36,803 --> 01:07:38,262
[ Laughter ]
1523
01:07:38,263 --> 01:07:42,307
And I was angry at this
guy, but then I got sad.
1524
01:07:42,308 --> 01:07:45,644
Because of the
driver, the Spree driver.
1525
01:07:45,645 --> 01:07:49,314
He was all like, "How'd
you get such a big following?
1526
01:07:49,315 --> 01:07:51,817
We should share tips."
1527
01:07:51,818 --> 01:07:54,152
And then he was kind
of, like, soft begging,
1528
01:07:54,153 --> 01:07:57,155
like, "Oh, please,
Lord, tag me."
1529
01:07:57,156 --> 01:08:01,118
- [ Laughter ]
- And it was so sad and pathetic.
1530
01:08:01,119 --> 01:08:04,997
And it was just like me.
1531
01:08:04,998 --> 01:08:08,417
I went to my granny's house
after, my... my safe place,
1532
01:08:08,418 --> 01:08:10,377
like, my pre-show sanctuary.
1533
01:08:10,378 --> 01:08:13,171
And I could not shake that
ride. Like, I was so pissed.
1534
01:08:13,172 --> 01:08:14,590
And I was thinking
about that guy
1535
01:08:14,591 --> 01:08:16,383
and that "please tag me" energy.
1536
01:08:16,384 --> 01:08:19,344
And I was like, "Ugh,
God, that was pure me."
1537
01:08:19,345 --> 01:08:22,472
Like, he was me. I've
done that shit before.
1538
01:08:22,473 --> 01:08:24,766
And then I just, like,
reckoned with myself.
1539
01:08:24,767 --> 01:08:27,227
For the last two years, I've
been saying, "All eyes on me."
1540
01:08:27,228 --> 01:08:31,690
Now I finally have what I want,
and I am creeped the fuck out.
1541
01:08:31,691 --> 01:08:33,317
I'm serious.
1542
01:08:33,318 --> 01:08:35,861
It's like whether you
have 20 million followers
1543
01:08:35,862 --> 01:08:40,365
or 20 followers, we're all being
watched and judged and hated.
1544
01:08:40,366 --> 01:08:41,908
And you love it, you love it.
1545
01:08:41,909 --> 01:08:44,202
You need it. You're
all addicted to it.
1546
01:08:44,203 --> 01:08:45,787
And you're addicted
to other people.
1547
01:08:45,788 --> 01:08:46,997
You're not doing you.
1548
01:08:46,998 --> 01:08:49,082
You're doing somebody
else for somebody else.
1549
01:08:49,083 --> 01:08:51,668
How are we supposed to
know who we are as people
1550
01:08:51,669 --> 01:08:53,880
if we're just hamming
it up all the time?
1551
01:08:55,423 --> 01:08:58,175
Okay, I can read the energy.
1552
01:08:58,176 --> 01:09:01,554
It's very quiet in this room.
I can hear a long-held fart.
1553
01:09:02,347 --> 01:09:05,891
And I'm sure you're like,
"Jessie, why so serious?
1554
01:09:05,892 --> 01:09:07,184
Where are the jokes?"
1555
01:09:07,185 --> 01:09:08,769
We're living in it.
1556
01:09:08,770 --> 01:09:12,272
You, me, that Spree driver,
we're all punking ourselves.
1557
01:09:12,273 --> 01:09:14,232
And that's why when
I wake up tomorrow,
1558
01:09:14,233 --> 01:09:15,275
I'm going cold turkey.
1559
01:09:15,276 --> 01:09:17,069
No more social media for me.
1560
01:09:17,070 --> 01:09:18,612
- [ Crowd groans ]
- Okay.
1561
01:09:18,613 --> 01:09:20,906
Those are the devils on my
shoulder trying to hold me down.
1562
01:09:20,907 --> 01:09:24,159
Do we have any
angels in the house?
1563
01:09:24,160 --> 01:09:26,787
Do I have any
angels in the house?
1564
01:09:26,788 --> 01:09:29,706
- [ Cheers and applause ]
- So you ready for your log-off?
1565
01:09:29,707 --> 01:09:33,251
- #KurtMegaFail.
- You want me to smash this shit?
1566
01:09:33,252 --> 01:09:35,212
You ready? Are
you ready for this?
1567
01:09:35,213 --> 01:09:38,256
Okay, all eyes on this, bitch!
1568
01:09:38,257 --> 01:09:39,883
[ Cheers and applause ]
1569
01:09:39,884 --> 01:09:41,344
Yeah!
1570
01:09:43,179 --> 01:09:46,557
[ Cheering ]
1571
01:09:53,147 --> 01:09:54,481
[ Microphone thuds ]
1572
01:09:54,482 --> 01:09:57,484
MILES: Hell, yeah, Jessie.
1573
01:09:57,485 --> 01:10:00,237
That was crazy
cool. I got all that shit.
1574
01:10:00,238 --> 01:10:01,947
That was tight.
1575
01:10:01,948 --> 01:10:03,115
Miles, get out of my face.
1576
01:10:03,116 --> 01:10:04,116
MILES: Hey, come on.
1577
01:10:04,117 --> 01:10:06,076
This is a historical moment.
1578
01:10:06,077 --> 01:10:08,704
Jessie Adams off social
media. I got to document this.
1579
01:10:08,705 --> 01:10:10,664
Why don't you pay me on
time? That would be historic.
1580
01:10:10,665 --> 01:10:12,374
I hooked us up. Joke Bros, baby.
1581
01:10:12,375 --> 01:10:14,042
- God.
- Joke Bros in here.
1582
01:10:14,043 --> 01:10:17,796
Miles Manderville. Jessie
motherfucking Adams.
1583
01:10:17,797 --> 01:10:19,339
- That...
- I got to get some air.
1584
01:10:19,340 --> 01:10:22,300
- Get the fuck out of my way.
- Okay. Jesus.
1585
01:10:22,301 --> 01:10:25,304
We're in this! Fuck, yeah!
1586
01:10:30,977 --> 01:10:32,687
[ Cellphone chimes ]
1587
01:10:45,283 --> 01:10:47,702
[ Car door opens ]
1588
01:10:51,497 --> 01:10:52,789
[ Car door closes ]
1589
01:10:52,790 --> 01:10:54,207
Are you Kurt?
1590
01:10:54,208 --> 01:10:56,001
I'm Kurt. That's me.
1591
01:10:56,002 --> 01:10:57,378
Okay.
1592
01:10:58,087 --> 01:10:59,421
Yeah, that's me.
1593
01:10:59,422 --> 01:11:01,006
Don't you recognize
my name? Kurt Kunkle?
1594
01:11:01,007 --> 01:11:02,674
MILES: I just want to
say I've known Jessie
1595
01:11:02,675 --> 01:11:03,842
for, like, over five years,
1596
01:11:03,843 --> 01:11:05,343
and she has
always been killing it.
1597
01:11:05,344 --> 01:11:06,720
This is not a sur... Come on.
1598
01:11:06,721 --> 01:11:08,638
You still fixated
on that 700 bucks?
1599
01:11:08,639 --> 01:11:10,140
- Come on, Jessie.
- Fixated?
1600
01:11:10,141 --> 01:11:11,683
You owe me 700 bucks.
1601
01:11:11,684 --> 01:11:13,143
- And put the fucking phone down.
- MILES: Do you have any idea
1602
01:11:13,144 --> 01:11:14,936
how many people are
watching this, Jessie?
1603
01:11:14,937 --> 01:11:16,354
I'm not gonna
lose this audience.
1604
01:11:16,355 --> 01:11:18,106
What's up, people?
1605
01:11:18,107 --> 01:11:21,318
[ Slow music playing ]
1606
01:11:21,319 --> 01:11:23,696
Do sumthin.
1607
01:11:25,740 --> 01:11:28,241
You got a dash cam
and everything, huh?
1608
01:11:28,242 --> 01:11:31,454
Yes. You can never be too safe.
1609
01:11:45,676 --> 01:11:47,470
Yeah, I got one, too.
1610
01:11:48,346 --> 01:11:50,514
MILES: Come on, we
should be fucking celebrating.
1611
01:11:50,515 --> 01:11:52,098
Celebrating what?
1612
01:11:52,099 --> 01:11:55,352
MILES: The... The fact that
your set is gonna go viral.
1613
01:11:55,353 --> 01:11:58,230
All the right people
saw that, Jessie.
1614
01:11:58,231 --> 01:11:59,773
You're made. I would...
1615
01:11:59,774 --> 01:12:01,942
I would... I would
kill for that, Jessie.
1616
01:12:01,943 --> 01:12:04,820
Honestly, that was...
That was crazy.
1617
01:12:04,821 --> 01:12:08,031
- Let me buy you a drink.
- Fine.
1618
01:12:08,032 --> 01:12:09,449
[ Zipper closes ]
1619
01:12:09,450 --> 01:12:11,409
KURT: Pretty
fucking cool, right?
1620
01:12:11,410 --> 01:12:12,911
Okay, just so you know,
1621
01:12:12,912 --> 01:12:15,872
I'm not the crazy driver
driving around tonight.
1622
01:12:15,873 --> 01:12:17,875
[ Laughs ]
1623
01:12:20,795 --> 01:12:22,880
[ Laughs ]
1624
01:12:29,262 --> 01:12:30,763
I know.
1625
01:12:32,265 --> 01:12:34,140
MILES: Dang, Jessie,
you're getting a little drunk.
1626
01:12:34,141 --> 01:12:37,185
- Can I take you home?
- No. Just order me a Spree.
1627
01:12:37,186 --> 01:12:38,436
MILES: No doubt.
1628
01:12:38,437 --> 01:12:41,273
Uh, weird. Spree's down.
1629
01:12:41,274 --> 01:12:43,775
You know I could just give
you a ride in my car, right?
1630
01:12:43,776 --> 01:12:45,944
Oh, my God, no.
You're too drunk to drive.
1631
01:12:45,945 --> 01:12:47,612
You're not killing
me in your death trap.
1632
01:12:47,613 --> 01:12:49,614
- MILES: It's not like that.
- Just order us a GoGo.
1633
01:12:49,615 --> 01:12:51,616
- MILES: Order us? Okay.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1634
01:12:51,617 --> 01:12:53,159
We go... We going to...
We going to my place?
1635
01:12:53,160 --> 01:12:55,996
- Or what's happening here?
- No, go to my place.
1636
01:12:55,997 --> 01:12:57,664
Oh, damn, okay.
1637
01:12:57,665 --> 01:13:00,125
Uh, alright, yeah.
1638
01:13:00,126 --> 01:13:02,460
Get a GoGo for sure.
1639
01:13:02,461 --> 01:13:06,464
Sweet. Yeah, there's one...
There's one down the block.
1640
01:13:06,465 --> 01:13:07,674
What kind of car is it?
1641
01:13:07,675 --> 01:13:10,093
MILES: It's a white coupe.
1642
01:13:10,094 --> 01:13:11,636
Okay, cool.
1643
01:13:11,637 --> 01:13:13,847
MILES: Alright, cool. Alright.
1644
01:13:13,848 --> 01:13:15,765
Give me... Give me one second.
1645
01:13:15,766 --> 01:13:18,476
I'm live-streaming all
night, by the way, folks.
1646
01:13:18,477 --> 01:13:20,479
- Alright.
- Okay.
1647
01:13:21,814 --> 01:13:23,982
- What's up, Miles?
- Nice one, Miles.
1648
01:13:23,983 --> 01:13:25,775
MILES: Hey, what's
up? Hey, yo, hey, Je...
1649
01:13:25,776 --> 01:13:27,402
Excuse me. Hey, Jessie, wait up.
1650
01:13:27,403 --> 01:13:28,445
[ Door closes ]
1651
01:13:28,446 --> 01:13:29,988
Jessie!
1652
01:13:29,989 --> 01:13:32,782
- Jessie, wait up!
- JESSIE: Drive, drive, drive.
1653
01:13:32,783 --> 01:13:35,493
MILES: Oh, sucks.
1654
01:13:35,494 --> 01:13:37,705
- MAN: Nice one, Miles.
- Fuck you.
1655
01:13:40,291 --> 01:13:42,710
[ Slow music playing ]
1656
01:13:44,503 --> 01:13:46,379
JESSIE: Wait, what
address did he give you?
1657
01:13:46,380 --> 01:13:48,340
375 South Hobart.
1658
01:13:48,341 --> 01:13:50,593
- Okay, good.
- Good.
1659
01:13:56,349 --> 01:13:59,727
Hey.
1660
01:14:01,395 --> 01:14:03,438
Hey.
1661
01:14:03,439 --> 01:14:05,608
What, man? I'm
about to pass out.
1662
01:14:06,525 --> 01:14:10,029
I liked your set tonight. It
was... It was inspirational.
1663
01:14:10,529 --> 01:14:11,738
- You saw it?
- Hell, yeah.
1664
01:14:11,739 --> 01:14:13,657
I was there. It was awesome.
1665
01:14:13,658 --> 01:14:15,575
Jessie, I think you're
actually a genius.
1666
01:14:15,576 --> 01:14:17,160
JESSIE: Thanks, man.
1667
01:14:17,161 --> 01:14:19,371
I'm so glad you didn't take
that water bottle earlier.
1668
01:14:19,372 --> 01:14:20,790
That would have been...
1669
01:14:21,540 --> 01:14:23,042
What water?
1670
01:14:24,001 --> 01:14:27,045
The water from
earlier. Seat pouch.
1671
01:14:27,046 --> 01:14:28,631
Left side.
1672
01:14:30,549 --> 01:14:33,094
Wait Ku... Kurtis?
1673
01:14:34,553 --> 01:14:36,013
Try again.
1674
01:14:37,473 --> 01:14:38,765
- Kurtis?
- Kurt.
1675
01:14:38,766 --> 01:14:41,059
- Kurt.
- Kurt's World, remember?
1676
01:14:41,060 --> 01:14:43,228
- Squirt's World, yeah, yeah.
- Follow me.
1677
01:14:43,229 --> 01:14:45,063
KurtsWorld96.
1678
01:14:45,064 --> 01:14:46,524
Uh...
1679
01:14:47,566 --> 01:14:49,567
- Okay, this is really weird.
- Yeah.
1680
01:14:49,568 --> 01:14:51,569
Isn't this weird? I
know. It's amazing.
1681
01:14:51,570 --> 01:14:54,614
I just, like... I pick you up
today, and then I go online.
1682
01:14:54,615 --> 01:14:57,492
I buy a ticket to
support you, and it's like,
1683
01:14:57,493 --> 01:14:59,161
what are the odds?
1684
01:15:00,413 --> 01:15:03,915
I mean, uh, okay.
1685
01:15:03,916 --> 01:15:06,042
- Thanks for your support.
- Totally.
1686
01:15:06,043 --> 01:15:07,627
Uh...
1687
01:15:07,628 --> 01:15:08,920
Did you like the set?
1688
01:15:08,921 --> 01:15:10,964
I didn't mean to
rag on you that hard.
1689
01:15:10,965 --> 01:15:12,590
- Rag on me?
- Yeah.
1690
01:15:12,591 --> 01:15:14,092
Sticks and stones, Jessie Adams.
1691
01:15:14,093 --> 01:15:16,261
No, no, no, no, no.
I'm fine. I liked it.
1692
01:15:16,262 --> 01:15:17,512
I liked all what you did.
1693
01:15:17,513 --> 01:15:19,806
Because when you
were talking up there,
1694
01:15:19,807 --> 01:15:22,851
I realized inside me, it
was like this activator.
1695
01:15:22,852 --> 01:15:25,603
And it, like... Whoa,
all of a sudden,
1696
01:15:25,604 --> 01:15:28,189
the things that you were saying,
I realized they were in my head,
1697
01:15:28,190 --> 01:15:30,108
but I just had not
thought them yet.
1698
01:15:30,109 --> 01:15:32,777
- Okay, yeah.
- And that to me...
1699
01:15:32,778 --> 01:15:35,113
That to me... That's
not gonna work.
1700
01:15:35,114 --> 01:15:36,281
What?
1701
01:15:36,282 --> 01:15:38,783
That's not gonna work, Jessie.
1702
01:15:38,784 --> 01:15:40,118
Hee hee hee.
1703
01:15:40,119 --> 01:15:42,913
Your phone, you broke it
during the set, remember?
1704
01:15:43,956 --> 01:15:45,248
- Yeah, I remember.
- Of course.
1705
01:15:45,249 --> 01:15:46,791
Oh, my gosh, how
could you forget?
1706
01:15:46,792 --> 01:15:48,460
How could I forget?
How could anyone forget?
1707
01:15:48,461 --> 01:15:51,504
Oh, my gosh, I had this, like,
crazy breakthrough today, too.
1708
01:15:51,505 --> 01:15:53,965
JESSIE: Why are we going
east? We need to be going west?
1709
01:15:53,966 --> 01:15:55,258
You know what I'm
all about now, Jessie?
1710
01:15:55,259 --> 01:15:57,302
I'm all about love.
I'm a man of love.
1711
01:15:57,303 --> 01:15:59,262
You can just... just pull
over here and let me out.
1712
01:15:59,263 --> 01:16:00,472
Okay, just listen to me.
1713
01:16:00,473 --> 01:16:02,307
I'm just trying to, like,
make myself heard by you.
1714
01:16:02,308 --> 01:16:04,100
So, like, check this out.
1715
01:16:04,101 --> 01:16:06,686
Love is more
powerful than anything.
1716
01:16:06,687 --> 01:16:08,772
That's something that I figured
out back there at the show.
1717
01:16:08,773 --> 01:16:09,981
- It's like love...
- Just let me out, man.
1718
01:16:09,982 --> 01:16:12,484
- Just please...
- love is more powerful
1719
01:16:12,485 --> 01:16:13,777
than anything.
1720
01:16:13,778 --> 01:16:15,195
- You know what I mean?
- No.
1721
01:16:15,196 --> 01:16:16,821
It could break down
any sort of barrier
1722
01:16:16,822 --> 01:16:18,406
between any type of person.
1723
01:16:18,407 --> 01:16:22,285
It's like, man, how can
something that's so powerful
1724
01:16:22,286 --> 01:16:23,953
also just be such a
good branding tool?
1725
01:16:23,954 --> 01:16:25,163
Kurt, please let
me out of the car.
1726
01:16:25,164 --> 01:16:26,831
Do you know what
I mean? And it's like
1727
01:16:26,832 --> 01:16:29,334
imagine the audience
that you and me could get
1728
01:16:29,335 --> 01:16:31,377
if we just plussed our
audiences together.
1729
01:16:31,378 --> 01:16:32,837
Oh, my gosh, can you
imagine the numbers...
1730
01:16:32,838 --> 01:16:34,631
You are freaking
me out right now.
1731
01:16:34,632 --> 01:16:36,007
From a leaked sex tape?
1732
01:16:36,008 --> 01:16:37,842
- That would be unbelievable.
- What?
1733
01:16:37,843 --> 01:16:39,260
And it's like having sex?
1734
01:16:39,261 --> 01:16:41,012
We're beyond having
sex at that point.
1735
01:16:41,013 --> 01:16:42,514
We're, like, making love.
1736
01:16:42,515 --> 01:16:45,058
Like, real love, though,
not, like, disingenuine love.
1737
01:16:45,059 --> 01:16:46,559
- It's cool, right?
- Where are we going?
1738
01:16:46,560 --> 01:16:48,019
I'm taking you home.
1739
01:16:48,020 --> 01:16:49,813
This is not the way to
my fucking house, Kurt.
1740
01:16:49,814 --> 01:16:51,689
Oh, no, not your home.
1741
01:16:51,690 --> 01:16:53,067
My home.
1742
01:16:55,111 --> 01:16:56,237
My home.
1743
01:17:15,965 --> 01:17:18,342
[ Turn signal clicking ]
1744
01:17:21,262 --> 01:17:22,470
[ Grunts ]
1745
01:17:22,471 --> 01:17:24,223
[ Tires screeching ]
1746
01:17:25,224 --> 01:17:27,517
[ Choking ]
1747
01:17:27,518 --> 01:17:28,726
Aah!
1748
01:17:28,727 --> 01:17:31,272
[ Tires screeching ]
1749
01:17:42,575 --> 01:17:44,784
Aah! Let go!
1750
01:17:44,785 --> 01:17:46,077
- [ Kurt grunts ]
- [ Punch lands ]
1751
01:17:46,078 --> 01:17:48,247
[ Breathing heavily ]
1752
01:17:52,918 --> 01:17:54,753
What is wrong with you?
1753
01:18:01,427 --> 01:18:05,014
Didn't you listen to me? I
said I'm all about love now.
1754
01:19:01,570 --> 01:19:03,030
Okay.
1755
01:19:19,505 --> 01:19:21,882
Sorry, Jessie.
1756
01:19:50,828 --> 01:19:52,955
[ Car dings ]
1757
01:19:57,042 --> 01:19:59,210
Can't believe you
got out of the car bro
1758
01:19:59,211 --> 01:20:01,213
what a fucking dumb-ass.
1759
01:20:08,345 --> 01:20:09,388
Shit.
1760
01:20:10,556 --> 01:20:13,599
- [ Tires screech ]
- [ Breathing heavily ]
1761
01:20:13,600 --> 01:20:15,394
Oh, my God.
1762
01:20:26,447 --> 01:20:28,365
Run.
1763
01:20:40,753 --> 01:20:42,254
[ Screams ]
1764
01:20:49,386 --> 01:20:50,888
Aah!
1765
01:20:51,472 --> 01:20:52,598
[ Door opens ]
1766
01:20:56,643 --> 01:20:58,937
[ Screaming ]
1767
01:21:00,647 --> 01:21:02,982
Why are you doing this?
1768
01:21:02,983 --> 01:21:06,111
Jessie, we could have
been a power couple!
1769
01:21:08,947 --> 01:21:11,617
No! Aah!
1770
01:21:15,913 --> 01:21:17,247
[ Door closes ]
1771
01:21:33,180 --> 01:21:35,431
Sis you're doing frickin great!
1772
01:21:35,432 --> 01:21:37,600
Whoever the fuck is
watching this, you are sick!
1773
01:21:37,601 --> 01:21:40,520
What is wrong with you?
This is not a fucking TV show.
1774
01:21:40,521 --> 01:21:42,438
If you know where
we are, call the cops.
1775
01:21:42,439 --> 01:21:44,023
[ Clattering ]
1776
01:21:44,024 --> 01:21:45,483
Shit.
1777
01:21:45,484 --> 01:21:48,904
Shit, shit, shit, shit,
shit, shit, shit, shit.
1778
01:21:49,822 --> 01:21:52,199
What the hell happened here?!
1779
01:21:53,826 --> 01:21:55,993
Who are you?
1780
01:21:55,994 --> 01:21:58,746
What did you do?
1781
01:21:58,747 --> 01:21:59,997
I-I didn't do anything.
1782
01:21:59,998 --> 01:22:01,791
You're really
fucked up right now.
1783
01:22:01,792 --> 01:22:04,503
And I'm sorry if you're
drunk or high or...
1784
01:22:05,379 --> 01:22:07,130
I'm gonna have to call the cops.
1785
01:22:07,131 --> 01:22:08,381
Call them! Tell
them the address!
1786
01:22:08,382 --> 01:22:10,426
There's a fucking
psycho running around.
1787
01:22:12,344 --> 01:22:16,222
Oh, my God. Oh, my God, Angela.
1788
01:22:16,223 --> 01:22:18,683
Did you do this?
Did you kill her?
1789
01:22:18,684 --> 01:22:20,101
What did you do to her?
1790
01:22:20,102 --> 01:22:22,980
[ Grunting ]
1791
01:22:25,441 --> 01:22:28,192
Why don't you just kill me, too?
1792
01:22:28,193 --> 01:22:31,070
Angela's dead. Nobody
showed up to my set.
1793
01:22:31,071 --> 01:22:33,698
So come on! Take me out.
1794
01:22:33,699 --> 01:22:35,617
- [ Gunshot ]
- Ah!
1795
01:22:37,995 --> 01:22:40,038
Kurt.
1796
01:22:41,165 --> 01:22:43,208
Did you do this?
1797
01:22:43,959 --> 01:22:46,043
Did you kill your mother?
1798
01:22:46,044 --> 01:22:47,712
Thanks, Kurt.
1799
01:22:47,713 --> 01:22:49,422
Shit, almost forgot.
1800
01:22:49,423 --> 01:22:51,048
Mom.
1801
01:22:51,049 --> 01:22:52,884
Tell me you didn't
kill your mother.
1802
01:22:52,885 --> 01:22:54,470
KURT: Hey, Mom.
1803
01:22:55,304 --> 01:22:57,598
[ Woman screaming ]
1804
01:22:59,808 --> 01:23:01,058
No.
1805
01:23:01,059 --> 01:23:02,894
Kurt, seriously.
1806
01:23:02,895 --> 01:23:05,063
[ Gunshots ]
1807
01:23:18,660 --> 01:23:20,537
[ Gunshot ]
1808
01:23:22,247 --> 01:23:23,414
[ Gunshot ]
1809
01:23:23,415 --> 01:23:24,832
[ Engine sputtering ]
1810
01:23:24,833 --> 01:23:25,917
[ Gunshot ]
1811
01:23:25,918 --> 01:23:27,126
[ Engine sputtering ]
1812
01:23:27,127 --> 01:23:29,087
[ Engine starts ]
1813
01:23:31,673 --> 01:23:33,050
[ Crash ]
1814
01:23:41,391 --> 01:23:43,477
[ Tires screeching ]
1815
01:23:49,608 --> 01:23:50,651
[ Grunting ]
1816
01:24:00,786 --> 01:24:04,248
[ Breathing heavily ]
1817
01:24:06,166 --> 01:24:07,751
[ Gearshift clicks ]
1818
01:24:14,508 --> 01:24:16,676
KURT: Wow.
1819
01:24:16,677 --> 01:24:17,843
Thanks for watching.
1820
01:24:17,844 --> 01:24:21,765
And hopefully a lot
of you now follow me.
1821
01:24:23,934 --> 01:24:26,269
What a crazy day for me.
1822
01:24:26,270 --> 01:24:30,399
Jessie please go
see if Kurt is still alive.
1823
01:24:33,235 --> 01:24:35,945
So many emotions.
1824
01:24:35,946 --> 01:24:39,533
Highs and lows.
1825
01:24:40,534 --> 01:24:44,621
And here we are, the
end of "The Lesson."
1826
01:24:52,671 --> 01:24:55,506
I really hope you guys
learned something.
1827
01:24:55,507 --> 01:24:59,511
I mean, I know you
learned something.
1828
01:25:02,180 --> 01:25:04,141
And as for me?
1829
01:25:10,314 --> 01:25:12,524
[ Grunting ]
1830
01:25:15,193 --> 01:25:17,404
50,000 people watching.
1831
01:25:22,159 --> 01:25:24,369
I guess I got what I wanted.
1832
01:25:29,541 --> 01:25:32,376
♪ Doo-doo doo-doo-doo
doo-doo-doo ♪
1833
01:25:32,377 --> 01:25:35,338
Grab a selfie with him! YOLO!
1834
01:25:35,339 --> 01:25:37,298
♪ Doo-doo-doo
doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo ♪
1835
01:25:37,299 --> 01:25:39,842
♪ Love him, I love
him, I love him ♪
1836
01:25:39,843 --> 01:25:41,719
♪ And where he
goes I'll follow ♪
1837
01:25:41,720 --> 01:25:44,055
♪ I'll follow, I'll follow ♪
1838
01:25:44,056 --> 01:25:47,308
♪ I will follow him ♪
1839
01:25:47,309 --> 01:25:52,271
♪ Follow him
wherever he may go ♪
1840
01:25:52,272 --> 01:25:56,108
♪ There isn't an
ocean too deep ♪
1841
01:25:56,109 --> 01:25:59,904
♪ A mountain so high
it can keep me away ♪
1842
01:25:59,905 --> 01:26:01,489
Looks like someone fucked up
1843
01:26:01,490 --> 01:26:04,867
and put your girl in
a fancy hotel. What?
1844
01:26:04,868 --> 01:26:06,744
- ♪ Follow him ♪
- [ Laughter ]
1845
01:26:06,745 --> 01:26:09,872
♪ Ever since he touched
my hand, I knew ♪
1846
01:26:09,873 --> 01:26:11,916
All eyes on me! I
want to be seen!
1847
01:26:11,917 --> 01:26:15,419
♪ That near him I
always must be ♪
1848
01:26:15,420 --> 01:26:18,506
♪ And nothing can
keep him from me ♪
1849
01:26:18,507 --> 01:26:21,759
♪ He is my destiny ♪
1850
01:26:21,760 --> 01:26:23,010
♪ Destiny ♪
1851
01:26:23,011 --> 01:26:25,846
♪ I love him, I love
him, I love him ♪
1852
01:26:25,847 --> 01:26:28,057
♪ And where he
goes I'll follow ♪
1853
01:26:28,058 --> 01:26:30,059
♪ I'll follow, I'll follow ♪
1854
01:26:30,060 --> 01:26:31,644
♪ He'll always be my true love ♪
1855
01:26:31,645 --> 01:26:33,604
♪ My true love, my true love ♪
1856
01:26:33,605 --> 01:26:35,564
♪ From now until forever ♪
1857
01:26:35,565 --> 01:26:37,608
♪ Forever, forever ♪
1858
01:26:37,609 --> 01:26:39,652
♪ I will follow him ♪
1859
01:26:39,653 --> 01:26:43,781
But the thing about me is
that I'll continue to find Kurt.
1860
01:26:43,782 --> 01:26:45,741
I will continue
to dig until I get...
1861
01:26:45,742 --> 01:26:48,744
Until I get the...
Until I get real Kurt.
1862
01:26:48,745 --> 01:26:51,706
And that's why you're...
That's why you'll subscribe.
1863
01:26:51,707 --> 01:26:56,585
♪ It can keep me away ♪
1864
01:26:56,586 --> 01:27:00,632
♪ Away from my love ♪
1865
01:27:01,341 --> 01:27:04,468
♪ I love him, I love
him, I love him ♪
1866
01:27:04,469 --> 01:27:06,429
♪ And where he
goes I'll follow ♪
1867
01:27:06,430 --> 01:27:08,389
♪ I'll follow, I'll follow ♪
1868
01:27:08,390 --> 01:27:10,307
♪ He'll always be my true love ♪
1869
01:27:10,308 --> 01:27:12,268
♪ My true love, my true love ♪
1870
01:27:12,269 --> 01:27:14,228
♪ From now until forever ♪
1871
01:27:14,229 --> 01:27:16,230
♪ Forever, forever ♪
1872
01:27:16,231 --> 01:27:18,023
♪ I will follow him ♪
1873
01:27:18,024 --> 01:27:19,692
♪ Follow him ♪
1874
01:27:19,693 --> 01:27:24,488
♪ Follow him
wherever he may go ♪
1875
01:27:24,489 --> 01:27:28,701
♪ There isn't an
ocean too deep ♪
1876
01:27:28,702 --> 01:27:31,996
♪ A mountain so
high it can keep ♪
1877
01:27:31,997 --> 01:27:35,458
♪ Keep me away ♪
1878
01:27:35,459 --> 01:27:39,378
♪ Away from my love ♪
1879
01:27:39,379 --> 01:27:41,297
♪ And where he
goes I'll follow ♪
1880
01:27:41,298 --> 01:27:43,174
♪ I'll follow, I'll follow ♪
1881
01:27:43,175 --> 01:27:45,092
♪ I know I'll always love him ♪
1882
01:27:45,093 --> 01:27:46,677
♪ I love him, I love him ♪
1883
01:27:46,678 --> 01:27:47,845
Hey, guys, what's up?
1884
01:27:47,846 --> 01:27:49,180
It's Kurt here
from Kurt's World.
1885
01:27:49,181 --> 01:27:50,765
♪ I'll follow, I'll follow ♪
1886
01:27:50,766 --> 01:27:52,641
♪ I know I'll always love him ♪
1887
01:27:52,642 --> 01:27:54,560
♪ I love him, I love him ♪
1888
01:27:54,561 --> 01:27:56,353
♪ And where he
goes I'll follow ♪
1889
01:27:56,354 --> 01:27:59,733
[ Up-tempo music plays ]
1890
01:29:02,337 --> 01:29:03,587
[ Volume decreases ]
1891
01:29:03,588 --> 01:29:05,715
[ Volume increases ]
1892
01:29:27,737 --> 01:29:30,615
[ Down-tempo music plays ]
1893
01:29:32,617 --> 01:29:36,412
♪ Goodbye, dream world ♪
1894
01:29:36,413 --> 01:29:41,001
♪ Go root my dreams ♪
140095
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