Original subtitles

[military drum cadence]

[military march music]

? ?

[playing Anchors Aweigh]

? ?

- RIGHT FACE!

[helicopter rumbling]

- TEN...HUT!

- "DEAREST SWEET...

"THOUGHTFUL,

"UNDERSTANDING JANE,

I KNOW YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS, SWEETHEART..."

"BUT HERE GOES ANYWAY."

[deep breath]

"YOU MAY RECALL,

"YOU AND I WERE TO BE MARRIED

"A YEAR AGO LAST JUNE."

"AS I DIDN'T TURN UP FOR THE WEDDING

"AND SO MUCH TIME HAS GONE BY,

"I CAN IMAGINE YOU HAVE BEEN WONDERING--

"HA HA--

"WHAT HAPPENED.

"IT ALL BEGAN ONE DAY

DURING A ROUTINE MISSION IN THE FAR PACIFIC."

- [over radio] MANDRAKE 1-7 TO WINGDING.

I HAVE AN ANGEL 1-6.

REQUEST NEW COORDINATES FOR POSITION FIX,

INDICATING 3-4-0,

HEADING 2-7-2.

FIRE WARNING LIGHT ON.

FIRE WARNING LIGHT ON?

SMOKE AND FIRE FROM STARBOARD SIDE!

ESTIMATED POSITION, 300 MILES WEST OF PORT MORESBY.

MAYDAY! MAYDAY!

EJECTING, OUT.

OH!

WHOA!

[plane whistling]

[panting]

SURVIVAL KIT.

AH, BOY.

narrator: "SURVIVAL AT SEA AND LIKE IT!"

- OH, BOY.

narrator: "CHAPTER ONE: DOWN AT SEA.

"ALL RIGHT, MISTER, LET'S TAKE STOCK OF THE SITUATION.

"FIRST THING WE'VE GOT TO REMEMBER IS RELAX.

"DON'T PANIC.

"TRY TO ACHIEVE A CHEERFUL,

"CONSTRUCTIVE FRAME OF MIND AT ALL TIMES.

"NOW LET'S CHECK OUT THE SUPPLIES

"IN YOUR WATERPROOF SURVIVAL KIT.

"HERE WE GO.

WATER FLASK." - YEAH.

RIGHT.

narrator: "FISH HOOKS."

- OW! MM!

narrator: "NYLON CORD."

- A-FFIRMATIVE.

narrator: "COMPASS."

- YEAH.

narrator: "SHAMMY CLOTH."

- ALL RIGHT.

Narrator: "DYE MARKER, SIGNALING MIRROR,

WATERPROOF MERCURY FLASHLIGHT--"

- NO, HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT. narrator: OH.

- OKAY.

narrator: "FLARES,

"WHISTLE,

"SUN VISOR,

BAILING SPONGE."

- ROGER.

narrator: "SOLAR STILL FOR MAKING DRINKING WATER,

"SUNBURN OINTMENT,

"FABRIC PATCHING KIT,

"AIR PUMP,

KITCHEN MATCHES."

- HOLD IT. HOLD IT.

I DON'T SEE ANY AIR PUMP.

narrator: "CONCERNING AIR PUMP,

SEE ASTERISK AT BOTTOM OF PAGE."

"ASTERISK. AIR PUMP, DISCONTINUATION OF.

"DUE TO INEFFICIENT PERFORMANCE OF AIR PUMP IN SURVIVAL KIT,

"THEY ARE NO LONGER IN USE.

USE YOUR LUNGS."

- OKAY, HOW ABOUT SOME FOOD?

narrator: "EACH KIT HOLDS SIX TINS

"OF CONCENTRATED FOOD TABLETS,

"EACH UNIT ROUGHLY THE NUTRITIONAL EQUIVALENT OF...

[chuckles] A THANKSGIVING TURKEY DINNER."

- HMM!

narrator: "FIRST, HOWEVER, A WORD OF WARNING.

TAKE NO MORE THAN ONE TABLET OF EACH..."

- OR THEY'LL HANG IN YOUR CHEST LIKE A LEAD BALLOON.

[hiccups]

narrator: "OR THEY MAY CAUSE SOME INTERNAL DISTRESS."

- [hiccups]

"H," "H," "H," "H."

[hiccups]

THAT'S GREAT.

NOTHING LISTED FOR HICCUPS. [hiccups]

WHAT CAN I TAKE? [hiccups]

PUT A SHOPPING BAG ON YOUR HEAD.

THAT'S NO GOOD. NO SHOP--[hiccups]

NO SHOPPING BAG.

WHAT ELSE? [hiccups]

FRIGHTEN YOURSELF.

ALL RIGHT.

UH...LOOK OUT!

THERE'S AN OCTOPUS IN THE BOAT!

[hiccups]

THERE'S ANOTHER ONE.

WHAT ELSE?

STAND ON YOUR HEAD AND HOLD YOUR BREATH.

[hiccups]

OKAY, I'LL STAND ON MY HEAD IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN.

[hiccups]

[hiccups]

I DON'T THINK THIS IS GONNA [hiccups] WORK.

A SAIL!

HEY, SAIL! AHOY!

OVER HERE, SAIL!

LOOKS LIKE A CHINESE JUNK.

HEY! HERE!

AMERICAN!

HEY! HURRY UP!

CHOP-CHOP!

OH, NICE CHINESE SAILOR

MAKE AMERICAN BOY VERY HAPPY.

HEY! [hiccups]

HEY, OVER HERE, SAILBOAT!

YOU'RE NOT A SAILBOAT!

YOU'RE A SHARK.

YOU'RE A SHARK!

HEY! NO, GO BACK!

GO BACK! NO! GET OUT OF HERE!

WHOA! [shark scrapes raft]

narrator: "SHARKS ARE ALL COWARDS AT HEART.

"CHANCES ARE, A WELL-PLACED BLOW

"ON THE SENSITIVE AREA AROUND HIS NOSE

WILL SEND HIM PACKING."

- A BLOW ON THE NOSE?

YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING.

narrator: "A WELL-PLACED BLOW ON THE NOSE!"

- OKAY.

COME AND GET YOUR WELL-PLACED BLOW.

AAH!

OH! OH!

AH, THIS ISN'T IN THE MANUAL, BUT COME AND GET IT!

HA HA HA!

HA! A WELL-PLACED BLOW ON THE NOSE, HUH?

PUT THAT IN YOUR MANUAL NEXT TIME.

[escaping air squealing]

AAH!

[air squealing]

AAH!

[inflation tube squeaking]

[escaping air squealing]

[hiccups]

[hiccups]

[squealing diminishes]

[sputtering]

[hiccups]

[blowing]

[hiccups]

[sputtering]

AAH!

[inflation tube squeaks]

"AND THAT, DEAR JANE, IS HOW I DISCOVERED

A NEW WAY TO GET RID OF THE HICCUPS."

"THE FINAL LEAK WAS PATCHED,

"AND AFTER A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF TWISTING AND TURNING,

I MANAGED TO FALL ASLEEP."

[shark scraping]

[shark scraping]

"EVERYTHING MIGHT HAVE BEEN ALL RIGHT

IF IT WASN'T FOR MY OLD PROBLEM--"

"SLEEPWALKING."

AAH!

[grunts] [helmet crunches]

YOU COME BACK, YOU GET MORE OF THE SAME!

"NOW I WAS IN REAL TROUBLE.

"EVERYTHING--FOOD, WATER,

EVERYTHING I NEEDED TO SUSTAIN LIFE, WAS GONE."

"FOUR DAYS LATER.

"NO FOOD,

"NO WATER.

"THE SUN BEAT DOWN RELENTLESSLY.

"EVEN THE SHARK HAD RUN OUT ON ME.

NOT A SIGN OF LIFE ANYWHERE."

narrator: "IF YOU SHOULD RUN OUT OF PROVISIONS, DON'T PANIC.

"MAN HAS BEEN KNOWN TO LIVE OVER 70 DAYS WITHOUT FOOD.

"HOWEVER, AND MARK THIS WELL,

MAN DOES REQUIRE WATER."

"MORE THAN FOUR DAYS WITHOUT WATER,

"AND THE HUMAN MACHINE

WILL FIND ITSELF IN EXTREME DIFFICULTY."

[thunder booming]

- WATER.

HEY.

HEY, RAIN.

SOAK IT UP.

HEY! HEY, RAIN!

[laughing]

RAIN!

SAVE THE RAIN!

BEAUTIFUL RAIN! [laughing]

I'VE GOT RAIN!

I'VE GOT BEAUTIFUL RAIN!

HEY, SAVE THE BEAUTIFUL RAIN!

I'M SINKING!

GET RID OF THE BEAUTIFUL RAIN!

GET RID OF THE RAIN!

GET RID OF THE RAIN! OH!

[grunts]

[Hawaiian music playing]

[people chattering]

- HEY.

OOH.

[chuckling]

YOU'LL HAVE TO EXCUSE MY APPEARANCE.

I HAD A ROUGH NIGHT.

I MUST LOOK A SIGHT.

[wind whistling]

[birds calling]

narrator: "CHAPTER 10: ALONE ON AN ISLAND.

"WELL, WE MADE IT, DIDN'T WE?

"SO KNOCK OFF LYING THERE, MISTER, AND MOVE IT.

LOTS OF THINGS TO DO! UPSA-DAISY! IN THE--"

[narrator's voice muffled and gurgling]

- SHUT UP!

"ONCE I MADE MY PLIGHT KNOWN TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD,

I FELT BETTER."

"THE NEXT MOST PRESSING THOUGHT: WHERE WAS I?

"I MADE A CRUDE SEXTANT

AND TOOK A NOON SIGHT ON THE SUN."

ACCORDING TO MY CALCULATIONS, I AM SOMEWHERE BETWEEN...

ELMIRA, NEW YORK, AND MUNCIE, INDIANA.

YA--

"NIGHT WAS COMING ON NOW.

"WITH PALM FRONDS AND STICKS

"AND MY PONCHO FROM THE DINGHY,

I BUILT A SNUG LITTLE SHELTER."

OH, BOY, AM I LOOKING FORWARD TO A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP.

WELL, AS CONFUCIUS SAY,

"WHEN IN SOUP, MIGHT AS WELL ENJOY FLAVOR."

BOY. TOO MUCH!

[wind blowing]

[thunder booming]

[thunder booming]

[pancho creaking] OH.

[sputtering]

NO!

OW!

OH OH! AH-OOH!

OOH!

"THE DAYS BEGAN TO PASS.

"STILL NOT A GLIMPSE OF A PLANE OR SHIP.

"NOT A SIGN OF LIFE ANYWHERE,

"SAVE FOR BIRDS AND SMALL ANIMALS.

"TRYING TO CONSERVE MY OLD CLOTHES

"BEFORE THEY BECAME HOPELESS TATTERS,

"I FASHIONED NEW ONES OUT OF THE MATERIALS AT HAND.

"NOTHING PRETENTIOUS, A WARM-WEATHER ENSEMBLE.

"PLEATED HAT OF PALM,

"ANTI-SUNSTROKE ACCESSORY,

"AND A JACKET CUT ALONG SIMPLE LINES.

A DEEP, PLUNGING 'V' IN FRONT AND LACED SIDES."

[birds squawking]

LET'S SEE.

MAY, JUNE, JULY.

7, 14, 21...

22ND, 23RD, 24TH.

ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER NUT.

JULY 25TH.

? HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ?

? HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LIEUTENANT CRUSOE ?

? HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ? ?

HMM!

[jungle creature vocalizing]

"DRIVEN BY LONELINESS AND CURIOSITY,

"I RESOLVED TO EXPLORE THIS LONELY ISLAND,

IF IT WAS AN ISLAND."

"STILL NO SIGN OF ANOTHER HUMAN BEING.

IT WAS ALMOST AS IF I WERE THE FIRST PERSON ON EARTH."

"I GUESS I ALWAYS KNEW IT WOULD HAPPEN SOMEDAY.

"DEAR, YOU NEVER KNEW MY FATHER.

"HIS NAME WAS JOE CRUSOE.

"POP WAS A FRUSTRATED STREETCAR MOTORMAN

"BACK IN KANSAS CITY, KANSAS,

"WHO ALWAYS WANTED TO RUN AWAY TO SEA.

"HE NEVER MADE IT,

"BUT HE STUCK ME WITH THE NAME ROBINSON.

WHY COULDN'T DAD HAVE NAMED ME DWIGHT OR LYNDON?"

[wind whistling]

"IT WAS INDEED AN ISLAND.

"NOW I KNEW FOR CERTAIN.

I WAS ALONE."

"I TOOK A NEW DIRECTION HOMEWARD,

"COMING UPON A PART OF THE SHORE

"THAT WAS UNKNOWN TO ME.

"AT FIRST, I PAID SCANT ATTENTION

"BECAUSE I WAS TOO BUSY FEELING SORRY FOR MYSELF.

THEN I SAW IT."

[foreboding Japanese music playing]

? ?

[hatch creaking]

[hatch thuds]

HELLO?

HELLO!

UH, WAR OVER.

ME...ME A FRIEND OF SESSUE HAYAKAWA.

OKAY?

HELLO?

ANYBODY HERE?

[imitating sonar] BOOP-BOO-BOO-BOOP.

BOOP-BOO-BOO-BOOP.

[chuckles]

I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THIS.

BOOP-BOO-BOO-BOOP.

BOOP-BOO-BOOP.

OW.

HELLO!

[metal creaking]

[creaking]

[squeaks]

[metal creaking]

[heart beating]

[clattering]

[metal scraping]

[scrapes]

AAH!

[metal creaking]

[footsteps]

WHAT? OH, I...

HELLO. HA.

OH. [laughs] THAT'S ...

[hands thud] MMM!

UH, HELLO THERE.

[laughs] UH...

CAPTAIN NEMO, I PRESUME, HUH?

I MEAN, YOU PROBABLY NEVER READ

20,000 LEAGUES UNDER THE...

I SURE ADMIRE THAT GUN YOU GOT THERE.

BET SOMETHING LIKE THAT

COULD BLOW A HOLE BIG ENOUGH TO...

UH...

MIND IF I HAVE A LOOK AT IT?

UH, THAT'S-- IT'S NOT AN AMERICAN-MADE--

[bullet ricocheting]

[shatters]

- [blows]

[gunshot]

[shrieking, whimpering]

- WELL, THERE, THERE, BUDDY.

IT'S OKAY NOW.

HEY, LISTEN, HOW'D YOU GET HERE ANYWAY?

LISTEN, WHO ARE YOU?

HUH?

A FELLOW AMERICAN!

OH, BOY. IF YOU ONLY KNEW HOW GLAD I AM TO SEE YOU.

WHAT'S THIS?

"ASTRO-CHIMP FLOYD?

"PROJECT MERCURY.

"DISCOVERER OF BEARER

PLEASE NOTIFY NAVY DEPARTMENT, WASHINGTON, D.C."

AN ASTRO-CHIMP.

WELL, SIR, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING,

WHAT AN HONOR IT IS FOR ME TO MEET YOU.

IN MY BOOK, YOU'RE ONE OF THE GREAT HEROES OF OUR TIME.

HEY, YOU MIND IF I LOOK AROUND IN HERE?

"OF COURSE, HE COULDN'T ANSWER,

"BUT I COULD ALMOST FIGURE IT OUT FOR MYSELF.

"IT WAS YEARS SINCE THE CHIMP PROGRAM

"ON SPACE PROBES WAS PHASED OUT.

"FLOYD PROBABLY LANDED OUT OF RECOVERY RANGE,

"FLOATED TO SHORE IN A SPACE CAPSULE,

"BROKEN OUT, AND MANAGED SOMEHOW TO SURVIVE.

"AFTER ALL, WHY SHOULDN'T HE SURVIVE?

"FLOYD WASN'T JUST ANY ANIMAL.

"THE NAVY SELECTED THESE CREATURES ORIGINALLY

"FOR THEIR HIGH DEGREE OF ADAPTABILITY.

"AND AS I RECALL,

"THE I.Q.s OF THOSE ASTRO-CHIMPS COMPARED FAVORABLY

WITH, SAY, THOSE OF YOUR AVERAGE NAVAL ENSIGN."

OH, BOY!

A JAPANESE SUPERMARKET!

WAIT A MINUTE. LET'S NOT LOSE OUR HEADS HERE.

I DON'T NEED COMIC BOOKS.

I DON'T NEED THE GAS MASK, EITHER.

I DON'T NEED...

WHATEVER THAT IS.

NOW, LET'S DO IT THE WAY ROBINSON CRUSOE

DID IT HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO.

STILL MAKES SENSE.

YOU TAKE THINGS OFF THE SHIP

IN THE ORDER OF THEIR IMPORTANCE.

A STORM COULD COME ALONG AND TAKE THE BOAT

RIGHT OFF THE REEF AND SINK IT IN DEEP WATER.

TOOLS.

NEED PLENTY OF TOOLS.

CANDLES.

BLANKETS.

OH, CAN I USE BLANKETS.

GOSH, THESE LITTLE JAPANESE HOUSES ARE SURE CUTE.

THEY'RE SIMPLE, TOO.

HEY, FLOYD, I'LL BET WE COULD BUILD ONE OF THEM.

LET'S SEE.

"WE STRIPPED THE SUBMARINE OF TOOLS AND MATERIALS,

"AND BORROWING SOMEWHAT

"FROM THE TINKER TOY SCHOOL OF ARCHITECTURE,

"WE FINISHED IN A COUPLE OF WEEKS.

"IT LOOKED A LITTLE LIKE A DOLLHOUSE WITH A HANGOVER,

BUT WE WERE PROUD OF IT."

"WE NOW HAVE A NEW ADDITION TO THE HOUSEHOLD.

"A LITTLE MYNAH BIRD

"CAME BY WHILE WE WERE FINISHING THE HOUSE,

AND IT SEEMS HE HAS ATTACHED HIMSELF TO US."

- [chirps]

- HELLO, JANE.

- NO, NO.

UH, ME ROB, YOU JANE.

- ME ROB, YOU JANE.

- NO, LET'S GET THIS STRAIGHT.

JANE.

GET THAT? REMEMBER? JANE.

- REMEMBER? JANE.

REMEMBER? JANE.

- NEVER MIND. WE'LL WORK ON IT LATER.

[Floyd chattering]

- OH, FLOYD, THAT'S VERY PRETTY.

JUST PUT IT OVER HERE.

ANYPLACE IS ALL RIGHT.

VERY PRETTY!

"I MUST CLOSE NOW, SWEETHEART,

AS I WANT TO CATCH THE OUTGOING TIDE."

"I'LL BE WRITING EVERY DAY NOW.

ALL MY LOVE, ROB."

- REMEMBER? JANE.

REMEMBER? JANE.

- YOU BET YOUR BEADY, LITTLE BLACK EYES

I'LL REMEMBER JANE.

THAT GIRL IS ONE IN A MILLION.

BE BACK IN A MINUTE, FLOYD.

I'M GONNA GO DOWN AND MAIL A LETTER.

- REMEMBER? JANE.

- [whistling]

ONWARD, O MISSIVE OF LOVE,

THROUGH WIND AND RAIN AND SLEET AND SNOW,

THE MAIL MUST GO THROUGH.

[water flushing]

[whistling]

[shells clacking]

ALL RIGHT. I'LL CALL YOU.

LET ME SEE YOU BEAT THREE PRETTY LITTLE GEISHAS.

ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.

THREE SAMURAI BEAT THREE GEISHAS.

GO ON. TAKE 'EM.

[bird squawks]

OH, BOY!

- AH, SHUT UP!

- SHUT UP. DEAL.

- GOTTA GO PLAY A GAME OF SKILL WITH A DUMB ANIMAL.

- AWK! SHUT UP AND DEAL.

SHUT UP AND DEAL.

- HAVE I GOT A SURPRISE FOR YOU COME THANKSGIVING.

- SHUT UP AND DEAL!

- WONDER WHAT THIS STUFF IS WE GOT OFF THE SUBMARINE?

LOOKS LIKE SOME KIND OF A JAPANESE SOFT DRINK.

- OH, BOY.

OH, BOY.

OH!

[bottle fizzes]

- IT'S NOT BAD.

KUMQUAT COLA OR SOMETHING.

- OH, BOY! [squawks]

- A LITTLE FOR YOU AND A LITTLE FOR ME.

OKAY, BUDDY BOY, HERE WE GO.

I DEAL AGAIN.

[fizzing]

OKAY.

I OPEN FOR TWO CLAMS.

AND FOR PETE'S SAKE, FLOYD,

DON'T GO APE WITH THE BETTING.

IT ALWAYS SPOILS THE GAME.

OKAY, HOW MANY CARDS?

NOW, COME ON, FLOYD!

I'M TRYING TO TEACH YOU THE GAME.

A FULL HOUSE.

ALL RIGHT. LUCKY.

[drink fizzing]

[imitating Boris Karloff] WATCH THIS ONE.

[chuckles]

MMM.

COME ON, FLOYD. BOTTOMS UP.

CHUG-A-LUG.

HOW MANY CARDS?

ALL RIGHT, WISE GUY.

OKAY, WISE GUY.

I'LL PLAY THESE...

AND I'LL BET 'EM ALL. [shells rattling]

READ THEM AND WEEP.

NOT AGAIN.

ALL RIGHT, TAKE IT ALL.

GO ON, TAKE IT ALL!

HOPE YOU'RE...

HOPE YOU'RE PROUD OF YOURSELF.

DO YOU-- DO YOU KNOW SOMETHING,

MY FINE, HAIRY YOUNG FRIEND?

[slurring] YOU KNOW SOMETHING?

YOU PLAY POKER LIKE A WOMAN.

YOU KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE A WOMAN DOESN'T KNOW

WHAT CARDS SHE'S PLAYING, EITHER,

AND SHE ALWAYS WINS.

AND I'LL TELL YOU WHY SHE ALWAYS WINS.

- REMEMBER? JANE. [squawks]

REMEMBER? JANE.

- FLOYD, DID I EVER SHOW YOU A PICTURE OF MY FIANCEE?

THIS IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL CREATURE

IN THE WHOLE WORLD, FLOYD.

ISN'T SHE LOVELY?

I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU ASTRO-- [hiccups]

ASTRO-CHIMPS EVER HAD A LADY FRIEND, HUH?

I MEAN, YOU JUST NEVER HAD ONE.

ALL THAT RIGOROUS FLIGHT TRAINING AND--AND, UH...

REGULAR...REGULAR HOURS

AND NO DAMES,

STRICT...STRICT RULES.

OH, FLOYD, SHE'S LOVELY.

SHE'S--SHE'S IN SHOW BUSINESS, I SEE, HUH?

OH, FLOYD, HOW YOU MUST MISS HER.

FLOYD?

FLOY--FLOYD, A TOAST.

A TOAST WITH THIS DELICIOUS JAPANESE SOFT DRINK.

TO OUR LADIES FAIR...

WHERE E'ER THEY ARE, MAY BE.

FROM--FROM THEIR LONELY,

LOYAL SAIL--UH, BOYS.

[sniffling]

FLOYD, YOU LOOK TERRIBLE.

I BETTER PUT YOU TWO TO BED.

YOU KNOW, YOU SHOULDN'T--

YOU SHOULDN'T BREAK TRAINING LIKE THAT, FLOYD.

JUST A MINUTE, FLOYD.

[bottle fizzes and whistles]

MM.

YOU KNOW SOMETHING, FLOYD?

THEY OUGHT TO BOTTLE THIS STUFF.

[bird squawks]

- CAW! CAW! CAW!

FLOYD, A TOAST.

TO THE UNITED STATES NAVY

AND TO THE WORLD IN GENERAL,

WHEREVER THEY MAY BE.

[lullaby playing]

? ?

- COCK-A-DIDDLE-DOO!

AWK! COCK-A-DIDDLE-DOO!

COCK-A-DIDDLE-DOO!

COCK-A-DIDDLE-DIDDLE!

COCK-A-DIDDLE-DIDDLE- DIDDLE-DIDDLE!

- OOH.

- COCK-A-DIDDLE-DOODLE! AWK!

IT'S NOT "COCK-A-DIDDLE-DOODLE."

IT'S "COCK-A-DOODLE-DO."

"COCK-A-DOODLE-DO."

HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU?

- COCK-A-DOODLE-DO!

COCK-A-DOODLE-DO! [squawks, laughs]

COCK-A-DOODLE-DO!

[squawking and laughing]

- OH, THAT WAS A GREAT IDEA...

- COCK-A-DOODLE-DO!

TRAINING THE BIRD TO BE AN ALARM CLOCK.

OH!

[whistles]

- [chattering]

- MMM.

KUMQUAT COLA.

[thuds] AH!

[gasps]

AH!

WHY DON'T YOU LEAD OFF?

YOU GO OFF FIRST. HERE.

NOW, REMEMBER, KEEP YOUR HEAD...

WATCH YOUR GRIP. WATCH YOUR GRIP.

THAT--NO, THAT'S ALL WRONG.

YOU LIFTED YOUR HEAD...

NICE SHOT.

LOUSY FORM AND A NICE SHOT.

SOMETIMES IT'S JUST LUCK.

OOH!

- [chattering]

[laughing]

- OH, DON'T GET FUNNY.

JAPANESE CLUBS ARE A LITTLE SHORT FOR ME, FLOYD.

- [loudly groans]

- OHH.

OH, THAT'S A GREAT LIE, THAT IS.

RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF A FOOTPRINT.

FLOYD, YOUR FOOTPRINTS ARE ALL OVER THE PLACE.

HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU

TO RAKE OVER YOUR FOOTPRINTS

WHEN YOU WALK THROUGH A SAND TRAP?

IT'S ONE OF THE CARDINAL RULES OF PLAYIN' GOLF.

YOU REPLACE YOUR DIVOTS AND YOU...

YOU KNOW SOMETHING?

THAT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE YOUR FOOTPRINT.

[chuckles] FLOYD, I'M SORRY.

IT'S ONE OF MINE.

LOOK AT THIS.

[chuckles]

ACTUALLY, IT'S A LITTLE, UH...

LITTLE SMALL FOR MINE, ISN'T IT?

FLOYD...

WE'RE NOT ALONE.

[whispering] COME ON!

STAY CLOSE TO ME, FLOYD.

WHY'D IT GET SO QUIET ALL OF A SUDDEN?

- [screeches]

- COME ON, LET'S GO.

THAT MEANS EVERYBODY, SAILOR.

- [hooting] - COME ON!

- [whimpering]

- SEE, FLOYD? IT'S ALL RIGHT.

JUST AN ORDINARY DARK, TERRIFYING CAVE.

- [screams]

- AAH! OWW!

[thud]

- AAH!

- HEY! BE CAREFUL!

YOU'RE GONNA HURT SOMEBODY!

- [chattering]

[screeching]

- OW! OW! OW! OW! OW!

OW!

[Rob groans]

NOW, LISTEN.

JUST CALM DOWN.

I'M NOT-- I'M NOT GONNA HURT YOU.

SEE? I'M NOT GONNA HURT YOU. JUST--

THAT'S IT.

I'M NOT GONNA HURT YOU.

NOW, WAIT. DON'T, DON'T.

HEY!

DON'T STAND THERE, YOU DUMB APE!

WE'RE NOT PLAYIN'!

- [grunting]

- WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?

OW! [girl straining]

- ALL RIGHT... [panting]

NOW, I TURN YOU LOOSE, YOU GONNA BE GOOD?

ALL RIGHT.

NOW, JUST--JUST STAY CALM.

SEE?

NOTHING TO BE UPSET ABOUT.

JUST BE CALM.

THAT'S IT.

ALL NICE. NICE NOW.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

THAT'S RIGHT. ME TOURIST.

ALL SMILES. SEE TEETH?

BOY, YOU KNOW SOMETHING?

YOU'RE AS STRONG AS A MAN.

- [growls]

- OH, BOY!

DOGGONE IT! WATCH IT!

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?

[girl growls]

- OW!

QUIT! OW!

"SO HERE, MY DEAR, WAS THE DILEMMA.

"I COULDN'T TURN HER LOOSE.

"POOR, WILD THING

"ONLY SEEMED TO HAVE THIS ONE FIXED IDEA IN HER MIND.

"SHE SIMPLY WANTED TO KILL ME,

"SO I HAD TO KEEP HER.

"I'M SURE YOU UNDERSTAND.

I HAD TO KEEP AN EYE ON HER FOR MY OWN PROTECTION."

[laughs] I SURE TIED MYSELF A KNOT THERE.

THERE IT IS.

OKAY, NOW...

NO MORE FUNNY STUFF, HUH?

THERE.

SEE?

YOUR FRIEND ROB NO HURT.

UH...YOU HUNGRY?

WANT, UH, FOOD?

KAU KAU?

YOU THIRSTY? WANT WATER?

DRINK?

YEAH.

"LIKE ALL WILD THINGS,

"I KNEW, SOONER OR LATER,

SHE'D RESPOND TO A LITTLE HUMAN KINDNESS."

HEY! TAKE IT EASY!

HEY! THAT'S DANGEROUS! [Floyd screeching]

HEY! HERE WE GO! LADY, WATCH IT!

OKAY.

WE KNOW HOW TO DIE IN KANSAS CITY.

JUST MAKE IT QUICK.

- [crying]

- LISTEN, IF YOU DON'T MIND MY SAYING SO,

YOU SEEM A LITTLE ERRATIC.

- [sobbing]

- HEY, WHAT'S THE MATTNOW?

[girl sobbing]

- HEY, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

WHAT DID I DO?

LOOK...

YOU--YOU LIVE THIS ISLAND?

YOU GROW UP HERE?

WHERE...WHERE HOUSE?

WHERE YOU SLEEP, HUH?

- [sobbing]

- YOU--YOU COME, UH...

YOU COME ACROSS WATER?

YOU PADDLE ON BOAT HERE?

YOU--YOU LIVE OTHER ISLAND?

YOU--YOU ALL ALONE?

NOW WE'RE GETTIN' SOMEWHERE.

YOU GOT, UH...

YOU GOT A FATHER?

[Floyd hooting]

- PLEASE STAY OUT OF THIS, FLOYD.

I'M TRYING TO FIND OUT SOMETHING.

HOO-HOO-HOO--OH.

I'VE BEEN AROUND THAT CHIMP TOO LONG.

WHO IS YOUR FATHER?

YOUR FATHER, UH, FISHERMAN?

FATHER FISH?

UH, FATHER RAISE COCONUT?

UM...

FATHER HAVE TRADING POST?

MAKE BOATS. FATHER MAKE BOATS?

YOUR FATHER'S A MONKEY?

FATHER'S A...HE, UH...

A CHIEF, HUH? FATHER, CHIEF!

OH, YEAH. BIG CHIEF.

YEAH.

UH, IS HE A NICE FELLA?

HE NOT NICE FELLA.

HIM, UH...

UH, MAYBE CANNIBAL?

YOU KNOW, UH...

CANNIBAL. - [laughs]

- [laughs] WELL, THAT'S GOOD.

UH, SHE SAYS HER FATHER'S A HEADHUNTER.

[laughing]

WHY YOU COME THIS ISLAND?

YOU...

YEAH, YOU--YOU FATHER.

YEAH.

HE SAY YOU...

YOU...

UH, S--UM...

YOU, UM...

OH! MARRY!

YOU MARRY! YEAH.

YOU MARRY...

UH, A GUY OTHER ISLAND?

AND HE'S UGLY, YEAH.

UGLY GUY FROM OTHER ISLAND.

YOU FATHER...

HE GET, UH, BRACELETS,

YEAH, NECKLACES, AND...

OH-HO, HE GETS PAID FOR THIS.

HE GETS MONEY. UH-HUH.

YOU...YOU SAY NO.

YOU SAY BIG NO.

YOU SAY NO,

YOU WANT TO MARRY, UH...

YOU WANT TO MARRY...

THE CHIMP?

YOU WANT TO MARRY, UH,

TALL. TALL.

BIG, YEAH.

BIG FELLA WITH A-- THAT SMILES A LOT.

YEAH, A LOT OF TEETH. UH-HUH.

BUT...WAIT.

YOU FATHER, HE...

HE SEND YOU TO THE...TO SEAGULLS.

NO, THE-- SEND YOU TO THE...

THE SHARKS.

I GOT THAT, YEAH.

BUT WAIT.

FATHER...

CHANGED HIS HEAD.

CHANGED-- CHANGED HIS MIND!

FATHER CHANGED HIS MIND. YEAH?

HE PADDLED YOU...

TO THIS ISLAND.

WELL, WHY?

HE BRING YOU TO SEE...

A BIG...

FRANKENSTEIN.

NO, YOU SEE THE BIG, GREEN GIANT. NO.

- OOH!

- OOH! TURN YOU INTO STONE.

- NO. KABUNA. KABUNA!

- WHO'S KABUNA?

- KABUNA EVIL GOD OF ISLAND.

KILL, KILL! BIG HOO!

ALL FINISH UP.

- THE BIG STONE FACE WHERE I FOUND YOU, HUH?

WELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY...

YOU SPEAK ENGLISH.

- OH, YES.

SPEAK ENGLISH PLENTY GREAT.

FLUENTLY.

- WHY DID YOU KEEP IT SUCH A BIG SECRET?

WE WOULDN'T HAVE HAD TO GO THROUGH THAT OTHER STUFF.

- I LIKE OTHER STUFF. GOOD GAME.

A JOY FOR ME.

MOST TIME, I CATCH SAD LIFE.

MUST MAKE UP GOOD THINGS.

- OH, YOU MAKE UP THINGS, HUH?

LIKE ABOUT YOUR FATHER A BAD CHIEF

AND SENDING YOU HERE TO DIE.

- OH, NO. ALL TRUE. FATHER ALL BAD.

THROW ALL WIVES, NOISY DAUGHTERS KAU KAU TO SHARK.

LAUGH. HA HA HA HA!

- WAIT. HIS OWN WIVES AND DAUGHTERS?

- WHY NOT? GOT PLENTY LEFT.

- AND HE BROUGHT YOU HERE TO DIE?

- YES. KABUNA GET ME.

KILL, KILL. MASH, MASH.

I DIE OR FINISH UP.

- OH, FOR...

JUST BECAUSE YOU WON'T MARRY SOME DUMB CLUCK!

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE THE RIGHT TO MARRY WHOM SHE WANTS.

- WOMAN GOT WHAT? - RIGHTS.

- WHAT'S A MATTER WORD, "RIGHTS"?

- WELL, IT'S SOMETHING WOMEN HAVE WHERE I COME FROM.

THEY, UH... THEY DO WHAT THEY WANT.

- [chuckles]

FATHER BELONG ME BE CROSSIN' COCONUT,

HE HEAR YOU SING OUT THIS "RIGHTS."

- WELL...[chuckles]

I'M NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO MEETING YOUR FATHER.

HE NOT COME ALONG THIS SIDE BY AND BY, HUH?

- NO. - OH, GOOD.

HEART BELONG ME TICK-TOCK MUCH BETTER.

LOOK, I DON'T LIKE TO KNOCK SOMEBODY ELSE'S FAMILY,

BUT THIS FATHER OF YOURS SOUNDS LIKE A...

- HE NOT FRIGHT ME.

- WELL, I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING.

HE FRIGHT ME. MM-HMM.

BOY, WHAT AM I GONNA DO WITH YOU?

- NOTHING CAN DO.

FATHER AND KABUNA WORK TOGETHER.

PLENTY SMART.

- ANYWAY, YOU STAY HERE TONIGHT.

OH, EVERYTHING'S OKAY.

I'LL SLEEP OUTSIDE.

YOU SEE, EVERYTHING'S OKAY.

I'M PRACTICALLY MARRIED ANYWAY.

WAIT A MINUTE. HERE, I'LL SHOW YOU

A PICTURE OF, UH, MY GIRL.

[laughs]

THERE. LOOK AT THAT.

BEAUTIFUL, ISN'T SHE?

- EWW. LOOKS SICK.

WHERE GIRL COLOR GO?

- OH, WELL, SHE'S WHAT WE CALL A BLOND.

THEY HAVE MORE FUN, YOU KNOW. [laughs]

FLOYD.

NOW, DON'T WORRY.

I'LL LEAVE FLOYD HERE TO GUARD YOU.

YOU GOT THE PICTURE, FLOYD?

I AM APPOINTING YOU OFFICIAL PROTECTOR.

NOBODY, AND I REPEAT, NOBODY

GETS IN HERE TO BOTHER THAT YOUNG LADY TONIGHT...

AND THAT INCLUDES ME.

NIGHT.

JANE WOULD BE PROUD OF ME.

TAKES A LOT OF CHARACTER TO WALK AWAY

FROM A BEAUTIFUL NATIVE GIRL LIKE THAT.

I GUESS AT HEART, I'M JUST A GOOD, WHOLESOME KID.

GOOD, WHOLESOME, STUPID KID.

[wind whistling]

HAMMOCK DOESN'T LOOK TOO BIG TO ME.

[thunder rumbling]

[thunder booming]

[rain falling]

[thunder booming]

AW, DON'T TELL ME IT'S GONNA...

AW!

[wind howling]

AW, NUTS! AW!

[thunder booming]

OH, HI, BOY.

THAT-A-BOY. THAT'S THE WAY TO STAND A WATCH.

WHAT...

CUT THE CLOWNING, FLOYD! IT'S JUST ME! COME...

LOOK, STUPID, I JUST WANNA

GET A BLANKET OR SOMETHING 'CAUSE IT'S RAINING!

I'M NOT GOING IN THERE TO STAY. NOW, COME ON!

FLOYD, HAVE A HEART.

I'M FREEZIN OUT HERE.

ALL I WANNA DO IS GET THAT BLANKET THERE.

GO ON, FLOYD! PLEASE!

BOY, IF THAT ISN'T TYPICAL.

YOU GIVE A CHIMP A LITTLE AUTHORITY,

AND THEY WANT TO TAKE OVER.

THANKS A LOT!

I'D LIKE TO PUT YOU BACK IN ORBIT.

DUMB MONKEY.

[fabric tearing]

"BUT, UH, AFTER THE FIGHT WAS OVER,

"WE CAME TO TERMS.

"AND SO, MY DEAR,

"THAT'S HOW YOUR VERY OWN

"LIEUTENANT ROBIN CRUSOE MET HIS MAN FRIDAY,

"EXCEPT SHE WAS A GIRL.

"I NAMED HER

'WEDNESDAY.'"

- WEDNESDAY. AWK!

- "DON'T GET THE IDEA

"SHE'S ONE OF THOSE...

GORGEOUS ISLAND GIRLS."

- ISLAND.

- "SHE'S JUST A PLAIN LITTLE THING, ACTUALLY."

- YOU WRITE SCRITCH-SCRATCH ALONG HER?

- OH, YES, UH, TWICE A DAY.

- WHAT HER NAME?

- WHO?

- REMEMBER? JANE.

- UH, REMEMBER JANE.

JANE! THAT'S HER NAME. JANE.

SHE'S A REAL LOVELY LITTLE LADY.

- HMM!

[bird cackles]

DEAREST JANE.

DEAREST JANE. AWK.

- "ANYWAY, THE REAL PROBLEM ISN'T WEDNESDAY.

"IT'S TANAMASHU,

"THAT OLD HEADHUNTER FATHER OF HERS.

"MEANTIME, ALL MY LOVE.

HURRIEDLY, ROB."

- DEAR JANE. REMEMBER JANE. AWK.

- ? GO TELL AUNT RHODY ?

? GO TELL AUNT RHODY ?

? SHE'S REALLY UNCLE FRED ? ?

[tank flushes]

IT'S HIM! TANAMASHU!

WEDNESDAY!

TANAMASHU'S COMING!

THAT NUTTY FATHER OF YOURS, HE'S COME!

WE'VE GOTTA BLOW OUT OF HERE!

FLOYD, WILL YOU PUT DOWN THAT SILLY COMIC BOOK?

WE'LL HIDE IN THE JUNGLE!

WEDNESDAY, WHERE YOU GOIN'?

GIVE ME YOUR HAND. - [chattering]

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!

- [chattering] - FLOYD, COME ON!

- [chattering]

[women conversing indistinctly]

- I DON'T LIKE THE LOOKS OF THIS.

- [hooting]

- WELL, I MEAN, I LIKE THE LOOKS OF IT,

BUT I DON'T LIKE THE LOOKS OF IT.

[women conversing excitedly]

- SO?

SO LET'S GET OUTTA HERE!

[lighthearted orchestral music]

COME ON, FLOYD!

? ?

HEE-YA!

- [laughing]

[lighthearted orchestral music]

? ?

[giggling]

- OH, BOY.

[deep breath]

- [laughing]

- [coughing]

[Rob gasps]

WHO ARE YOU?

- SORRY.

THESE ALL SISTERS-COUSINS BELONG ME.

- OKAY, YOU CAN TELL FUN TIME

SISTERS AND COUSINS TO GET OUT OF THE WAY

IF THEY DON'T WANT TO SEE AN INNOCENT MAN DROWN.

- ONE MOMENT.

SISTERS-COUSINS ALL MUST RUN FOR LIVES!

WAS ALL MY FAULT.

I NOT GO MARRIAGE

WITH UGLY, BAD SNAKE ISLAND CHIEF.

FATHER BELONG ME CATCH CRAZY!

FATHER PLENTY CROSS.

KILL, KILL! BIG HOO!

BEGIN TO THROW ALL DAUGHTERS-COUSINS

KAU KAU TO SHARK.

- I'M DROWNING! YOU GOTTA BELIEVE ME.

I'M VE--VERY SINCERE.

- ONE MOMENT!

I TELL SISTERS-COUSINS, WOMAN GOT RIGHTS!

- GAH! MY WHOLE--

MY WHOLE LIFE PASSING IN FRONT OF MY EYES!

[gasps]

- WOMAN GOT RIGHTS, YOU SAY!

- OKAY, OKAY, WOMEN GOT--.

WOMEN GOT RIGHTS. [gasps]

- SO WE NOT GO NOW.

- YOU JUST SAID YOUR FATHER'S GONNA

KAU KAU EVERYBODY TO THE SHARKS.

- BUT FATHER GOT TO CATCH FIRST.

FIRST WE FIGHT!

- [gasps] FIGHT? FIGHT?

WEDNESDAY, YOU'RE OUT OF YOUR MELANESIAN MIND!

YOU CAN'T FIGHT!

- WE TRY.

SISTERS-COUSINS FIGHT GOOD, PROBABLY.

- [gasps and coughs]

- YOU BE OUR CHIEF.

- ME?

- WELL, CHIEF, ADMIRAL, GENERAL. WHAT IS WORD?

- THE WORD'S--[blows] THE WORD'S NO!

- [gurgling and spitting]

- [hooting]

[women singiAnchors Aweigh] - "FOLLOWING A BRIEF PERIOD

"OF BRAINWASHING,

"I DECIDED TO ACCEPT THEIR OFFER

AND MAKE THE BEST OF IT."

all: ? UNTIL WE MEET ONCE MORE ?

? WE WISHING YOU A HAPPY ?

? VOYAGE HOME ? [whistle blows]

- COMPANY, HALT!

NOW HEAR THIS!

IN MY BOOK, LADIES,

THERE'S JUST ONE WAY TO DO THINGS,

AND THAT IS THE NAVY WAY.

all: [giggling]

- THE ENTIRE EFFICIENCY OF A FIGHTING MACHINE

IS BASED ON JUST ONE THING.

DISCIPLINE.

- [giggling]

- DISCIPLINE, DISCIPLINE,

[stick snaps] DISCIPLINE!

all: [giggling]

- WE SHAPE UP OR SHIP OUT!

ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE IF WE CAN FORM A LINE ALONG HERE.

ON THE DOUBLE!

ALL RIGHT, LADIES. SHAPE UP!

OH, THAT'S ENOUGH SHAPING UP.

I SAID, THAT'S-- AT EASE!

ADMIRAL HONEY,

THEY ALREADY AT EASE, THANK YOU.

FEEL FINE.

LIKE YOU PLENTY.

- THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.

NEVER MIND.

- [giggling]

- ALL RIGHT, SAILOR, WIPE THAT SMILE OFF YOUR FACE.

I SAID WIPE IT OFF!

- OKAY, HONEY. [laughing]

- YOU MEAN "SIR."

- OKAY, HONEY, SIR.

[women giggling]

SMARTEN UP, SAILOR. SMARTEN UP.

all: [giggling]

- ALL RIGHT, BELAY THAT GIGGLING!

SAILORS DO NOT GIGGLE!

WHAT-- WELL, THANK YOU.

WAIT A MINUTE. NO.

WAIT A MINUTE. LET'S NOT CONFUSE THE RELATIONSHIP

BETWEEN AN OFFICER AND ENLISTED PERSONNEL.

LADIES, DISCIPLINE IS VERY IMPORTANT HERE!

COME ON! WILL YOU KNOCK IT OFF?

KNOCK IT... COMPANY, DISMISSED!

- [laughing]

- IT'S GONNA BE A VERY TOUGH WAR.

- HMM, NOT MUCH GOOD-LOOKING HOUSE.

- THAT DOESN'T MATTER.

WHAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT IS THAT WE GET OUR BATTLE STRATEGY

VERY CLEARLY IN OUR MINDS.

- OKAY, ADMIRAL HONEY.

YOU BOSS.

- YEAH. ALL RIGHT.

WHERE DOES FATHER USUALLY LAND HIS CANOES?

- ALWAYS HERE.

ALWAYS TAKE THIS PATH TO KABUNA HERE.

- WHAT DOES FATHER DO AT KABUNA?

- THEY DO GOOD BUSINESS.

FATHER STAND TO KABUNA.

FATHER SAY...

[deep voice] "I, TANAMASHU, HERE.

WHAT GREAT GOD KABUNA GOT TO SAY?"

AND KABUNA SAY,

"YOU GOOD CHIEF, TANAMASHU.

"KABUNA LIKE YOU PLENTY.

"TELL PEOPLE TO BRING YOU BEST FISH,

"BRING YOU PRETTY NEW GIRLS,

"THROW OLD WIVES KAU KAU TO SHARK.

THIS MAKE KABUNA PLENTY HAPPY."

- SOUNDS A LITTLE FISHY TO ME.

YOU MEAN, PEOPLE HEAR KABUNA SAY THIS?

- OH, NOT PEOPLE.

PEOPLE NOT HEAR.

KABUNA SPEAK ONLY TO FATHER. ONLY FATHER HEAR.

- OH! ONLY FATHER HEAR, HUH?

[chuckling]

I THINK I KNOW THAT BIT.

- WHAT'S THE MATTER, "BIT"?

- I MAY JUST VISIT KABUNA MYSELF.

I MAY OUTSMART FATHER.

- [laughs]

YOU OUTSMART FATHER?

- WEDNESDAY, ALL DUE RESPECT TO YOUR FATHER,

BUT HE IS, AFTER ALL, JUST A SAVAGE.

ON THE OTHER HAND, I AM GRADUATED WITH HONORS

FROM ONE OF THE FINEST TECHNICAL SCHOOLS

IN THE UNITED STATES.

NOW, IN ALL HONESTY,

WHO DO YOU THINK IS GOING TO OUTSMART WHO? WHOM?

- FATHER.

YOU GOT SOME OTHER PLAN, ADMIRAL HONEY?

- [sighs] WELL, AS A LAST RESORT,

I MEAN ONLY AS A LAST RESORT,

WE MAY HAVE TO FIGHT, MAKE A BIG HOO-HOO.

- THIS GOOD TYPE PLAN.

ALL SISTERS-COUSIN LIKE TO MAKE BIG HOO-HOO!

- OKAY, BUT, REMEMBER, WE HOO-HOO

ONLY IN THE CASE OF EMERGENCY.

SOMEONE MAY GET HURT IF WE HOO-HOO,

AND I'M AFRAID I KNOW WHO.

AHEM.

ALL RIGHT, YOU YOUNG PEOPLE, LET'S GET TO WORK.

SNAP IT UP!

[snap] MM-HMM.

- COUSIN, TAKE TOPSIDE. PLENTY HURRY.

- WHAT'S THE MATTER THIS THING?

- DON'T KNOW.

ADMIRAL HONEY SAY MOVE IT, WE MOVE.

NOW COME ALONG, SISTERS-COUSINS,

ON YOUR TOES! GUNG-HO!

NOW, MOVE OUT, MOVE OUT. COME ON.

- WHAT'S THE MATTER THIS?

MAYBE CANDY STICK.

YOU THINK?

- MAYBE CANDY, MAYBE NOT.

- HEY, WATCH IT!

HEY, THOSE ARE FLARES!

EXPLOSIVE.

[whistles, imitates explosion]

THEY'RE--

JUST TAKE THEM UP TOPSIDE.

DON'T FOOL AROUND.

- COME ALONG, SISTERS-COUSINS, NOW ON YOUR TOES!

GUNG-HO! NOW, MOVE OUT!

COME ON, MOVE OUT.

[equipment humming]

- WELL, HERE GOES.

[generator rumbling]

HEY! HEY, I DID IT!

I GOT THE GENERATOR WORK--

[thud] OW! OH, BOY.

[women giggling]

- STOP HORSIN' AROUND!

THIS THING IS DANGEROUS!

STOP IT!

AH!

HEY, AWAY FROM THE WATER!

THAT WIRE'S HOT!

SWEETIE, THAT LINE RUNS BACK TO THE GENERATOR.

YOU STEP IN THE WATER WITH THE JUICE TURNED ON,

[laughs] YOU'LL LIGHT UP LIKE A ROMAN CANDLE.

I MEAN, YOU SHOOT OFF, UH, SPARKS.

YOU KNOW, I MEAN, BIG SMOKE.

- THANK YOU.

YOU ARE PRETTY NICE YOURSELF.

- YEAH.

[pump humming]

HEY! - [laughs]

- SO FAR, SO GOOD.

- LIKE YOU SAY, SO FAR, SO GOOD.

- YEAH...

YEAH.

WEDNESDAY, I DO NOT LIKE THIS.

- SISTERS-COUSINS TAKE GOOD CARE OF ADMIRAL HONEY.

- FOR YOUR INFORMATION, ADMIRALS DON'T GET CARRIED

AROUND ON LITTERS BY GIRLS,

AT LEAST NOT IN WARTIME.

- WELL, LADIES GOT TO RESPECT,

GOT TO LOOK UP TO ADMIRAL HONEY.

RIDE IN LITTER, SAVE FACE,

ALSO FEET.

- IT'S NOT MY FACE I'M WORRIED ABOUT.

- [chattering]

- FLOYD, NO, NO.

GET DOWN FROM THERE.

YOU DO IT LIKE THIS.

I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WERE THE BIG BRAIN.

NO, YOU IDIOT! STAY BACK!

- [shrieking]

- [laughing]

DON'T GET SORE AT ME.

WHY DIDN'T YOU WATCH WHAT YOU WERE DOIN'?

WELL, MAYBE WE'VE LEARNED A LITTLE LESSON NOW.

YO-OH!

MOVE IT OUT.

PERISCOPE SECURE AND WORKIN'.

NOW, LET'S SEE--

FLARES.

TWELVE CASES.

SMOKE BOMBS, SIX.

OXYGEN TANK, ONE.

SMOKE MASKS.

TWO.

FIRST-AID KIT.

FIRST-AID KIT, ONE.

FLAMETHROWER, ONE.

O-KAY.

- [chatters]

- AND... FIRE EXTINGUISHER,

CARBON-DIOXIDE SPRAY TYPE.

NICE EFFECT.

OKAY, BATTERY PACKS, SIX.

EXTRA SPOOL OF WIRE, DOUBLE 14-GAUGE, TWO.

WATER VALVE INSTALLED AND WORKIN'.

AND THAT'S ABOUT IT.

MM-MM.

[amplifier humming]

[blows]

HELLO, HELLO.

TESTING, ONE, TWO, THREE. TESTING.

[blows]

HELLO.

HOW NOW BROWN COW.

[humming louder]

HELLO, BROWN COW.

ONE, TWO, THREE. TESTING.

[over loudspeaker] TESTING.

WOOF-WOOF. HELLO, MAX.

HELLO. HELLO.

HELLO. HMM! HELLO!

HOW NOW BROWN COW.

'ROUND THE RUGGED ROCK THE RAGGED RASCAL RAN.

SISTER SUSIE SELLS SEASHELLS BY THE SEASHORE.

[whispering] SOFT.

WHAT LIGHT IN YON' WINDOW BREAKS?

[over loudspeaker] IT IS THE EAST,

AND JULIET IS THE SUN.

SEE HOW SHE LEANS HER CHEEK UPON HER HAND.

WOULD THAT I WERE A GLOVE.

YOU READ...

[chuckles] SORRY, FOLKS.

KABUNA A LITTLE HAMMY THERE.

[laughs]

OKAY.

KABUNA SAY DAUGHTER OF TANAMASHU SPEAK!

GO AHEAD, WEDNESDAY. THAT'S YOUR CUE. SPEAK.

- OKAY.

I, DAUGHTER OF TANAMASHU, SPEAK.

- PROCEED! KABUNA LISTEN!

- I SAY WOMAN GOT RIGHTS.

- OKAY!

- I SAY WOMAN GOT RIGHT TO TALK.

- THAT'S RIGHT!

- I SAY WOMAN GOT RIGHT TO CHOOSE FIRST-CHOP FELLA!

[cheering]

I SAY TANAMASHU NO GOOD.

[cheering]

I LOVE TANAMASHU.

HE MY FATHER, BUT HE NO GOOD.

WE GIVE HIM BIG SQUEEZE!

[cheering]

- KABUNA GOT TO GO ALONG WITH DAUGHTER OF TANAMASHU.

DAUGHTER PLENTY OKAY.

KABUNA SAY WOMAN GOT RIGHTS.

- HEY!

- WOMAN GOT RIGHTS TO TALK.

- HEY!

- GOT RIGHTS TO CHOOSE FIRST-CHOP FELLA.

- HEY!

- TANAMASHU PLENTY TOUGH? OKAY.

THE BIGGER THEY ARE, THE HARDER THEY FALL.

AND THE TEAM THAT WON'T BE BEATEN,

CAN'T BE BEATEN.

[cheering]

ALL RIGHT, NOW GO OUT THERE

AND WIN ONE FOR OLD KABUNA!

[cheering]

all: ? ANCHOR AWEIGH, ME BOY ?

? ANCHOR AWEIGH... ? ?

[women giggling]

[giggling]

- ALL RIGHT. WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE?

THERE'S NOBODY IN THOSE LOOKOUT STATIONS OUT THERE!

THERE'S A WAR GOING ON, YOU KNOW?

COME ON! EVERYBODY MOVE IT BACK TO THEIR WORK!

ON THE DOUBLE!

- SORRY. MY FAULT.

- WELL, A FINE COMBAT FORCE THIS IS.

THERE'S NOBODY ON THOSE LOOKOUT POSTS.

EVERYBODY'S IN THERE PLAYING LAUGH AND GIGGLE

WHILE TANAMASHU QUIETLY SNEAKS IN HERE

AND CUTS OUR THROATS.

- WEDNESDAY SORRY.

- WELL, WE GOTTA RUN A TIGHT SHIP AROUND HERE.

LOOK, I AM TRYING AWFULLY HARD

TO KEEP A GRASP ON THE...

REALITIES.

HOW ABOUT WEDNESDAY FIX YOU BREAKFAST, ADMIRAL HONEY?

- WELL, OKAY.

I'LL WRITE MY LETTER.

- OKAY. YOU WRITE, I FIX.

"DEAR..."

UH...

"DEAR...

DEAR..."

"MY UNDYING LOVE, YOUR JANE."

JANE, JANE. THAT'S IT.

JANE. WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH ME?

OH, HONEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S COME...

OOH.

JANE?

I GOTTA GET OFF THIS ISLAND PRETTY SOON.

[groans]

"DEAR OLD JANE."

UH, "DEAREST JANE..."

- TANAMASHU.

TANAMASHU COME! TANAMASHU!

[straining to blow shell]

- "AS THE DAYS WEAR ON,

I CAN'T HELP FEELING MORE AND MORE..."

- TANAMASHU! TANAMASHU COME!

TANAMASHU!

TANAMASHU! TANAMASHU COME!

[screaming]

- TANAMASHU COME!

SOUND THE ALARM!

- SOUND THE ALARM!

[sheet metal clanging]

- "THIS IS IT.

"9:22 A.M.

"TANAMASHU SIGHTED.

"IF YOU DON'T HEAR FROM ME AGAIN,

"YOU'LL KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.

LOVE, ROB."

TANAMASHU COME! SOUND THE ALARM!

SOUND THE ALARM!

- TANAMASHU COME! [tray crashes]

- TANAMASHU COME! WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP!

[bird whistling and whooping]

[Floyd hooting]

BAD ENOUGH I GOTTA BE STRANDED

IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SOUTH PACIFIC

WITHOUT A BUNCH OF HYSTERICAL WOMEN.

ADMIRAL I HAD TO BE WITH MY BIG MOUTH.

CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NAVY TO COME AND GET ME.

[banging, screaming] - TANAMASHU COME!

[bird whistling]

- [blows]

[whistle blows]

ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY!!

EVERYBODY REMEMBER YOUR BATTLE TRAINING NOW!

REMEMBER YOUR TRAINING! LET'S NOT LOSE OUR HEADS!

HEY, UH, ADMIRAL HONEY'S

NOT GONNA LET ANYTHING HAPPEN TO ANYBODY!

I GOTTA GET A HOLD OF MYSELF.

ALL RIGHT, NOW! BATTLE ALERT!

BATTLE PLAN "A." [stammers]

[whistle blows]

ALL RIGHT, NOW, PLAN "A" FOR ABLE

IS UNDER OPERATION RIGHT NOW.

UNIT COMMANDERS, YOU GET YOUR MEN IN THEIR POSITIONS.

YOUR WOMEN!

UH, WEDNESDAY, GET MY--MY BINOCULARS.

OKAY? NOW GET YOUR WEAPONS, EVERYBODY.

[groans]

I WANNA WISH EVERYBODY A LOT OF GOOD LUCK,

AND KEEP YOUR SPIRITS UP.

KEEP YOUR COMMUNICATIONS OPEN.

ALL RIGHT.

UH, MOVE OUT! MOVE OUT!

[women shouting]

UH, WEDNESDAY!

WEDNESDAY, YOU GO--

YOU, UH-- YOU GO WITH ME.

NOW, REMEMBER, WE HOLD TO PLAN "A,"

UNLESS I SIGNAL.

NO VIOLENCE.

WE'RE GONNA NEGOTIATE.

UH, TALK-TALK.

- OKAY, OKAY,

BUT TALK-TALK STILL LOUSY IDEA.

YOU DON'T KNOW FATHER.

- WHICH ONE IS DAD?

YOU KNOW, I CAN'T HELP WONDERING

IF YOU'RE BEING FAIR TO YOUR FATHER.

- FATHER UNDER UMBRELLA.

- HE CAN'T BE AS BAD AS YOU'RE PAINTING HIM.

[thud]

- WHAT FATHER DOING NOW?

- [speaking native language]

- CHANGING A TIRE.

ALL RIGHT, GET READY.

GO ON.

- [speaks native language]

women: ? ANCHOR AWEIGH, ME BOY ?

? ANCHOR AWEIGH ? - [speaking native language]

all: ? FAREWELL TO COLLEGE, BOY ?

? WE SAIL ON BREAK OF DAY, DAY, DAY, DAY ?

? THROUGH OUR LAST NIGHT ? - HUH?

? ASHORE ?

? DRINK TO THE FOAM ?

? UNTIL WE MEET ONCE MORE ?

? WE WISHING YOU A HAPPY VOYAGE HOME ? ?

- [speaking native language]

[speaking native language]

[speaking native language]

[speaking native language]

BAD DAUGHTER!

YOU! [speaks native language]

both: [speaking native language]

- GRAB BAD DAUGHTER!

- ONE MOMENT, PLEASE.

BAD DAUGHTER GOT RIGHT TO TALK.

ALL WOMEN GOT RIGHTS.

- WHY?

WHY BAD DAUGHTER WANT RIGHT TO TALK?

WHAT'S THE MATTER, HUH?

GET EVERYONE MIX UP! [laughs]

WELL, EVERYTHING IS OKAY.

NO, WOMAN DON'T GOT TO NEED RIGHT TO TALK.

GREAT KABUNA SAY THIS.

- GREAT KABUNA NOT SAY THIS.

GREAT KABUNA SAY, "NO, NO, NO! WOMAN GOT RIGHTS!"

- KABUNA SAY, "NO, NO, NO, NO"?

HOW YOU KNOW?

- KABUNA TELL ME THIS.

- [laughing]

GREAT KABUNA TELL HER THIS!

EVERYONE KNOW KABUNA SPEAK ONLY TO TANAMASHU!

- KABUNA SPEAK TO ME.

- MAYBE. [chuckling]

MAYBE SO.

HOW ABOUT WE ALL GO KABUNA, HMM?

EVERYONE SEE KABUNA SPEAK ONLY TANAMASHU!

MAYBE GREAT KABUNA SPEAK BAD DAUGHTER, TOO.

OKAY, WE GO?

- OKAY.

- OKAY, WE GO.

WE HAVE FEAST, GOOD TIME, DANCING!

TALK ABOUT WOMAN RIGHTS TO GREAT KABUNA.

MAYBE THROW BAD DAUGHTER KAU KAU TO SHARK.

SHARKS GOT RIGHTS, TOO, EH?

[laughing]

[speaking native language]

[speaking native language]

- BOY, HE'S WALKIN' RIGHT INTO IT.

[Tanamashu speaking native language]

- COME ON, FLOYD!

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU? WILL YOU LET GO?

I CAN TALK TO YOU LATER. COME ON, FLOYD.

GOTTA GO.

IT'S VERY IMPORTANT, FLOYD!

I GOTTA GET OVER TO KABUNA-AAH!

FLOYD, GET ME DOWN FROM HERE! - [laughing]

- [speaking native language]

- KABUNA SPEAK TANAMASHU,

THEN WE DIE, ALL FINISHED UP.

- EVERYTHING OKAY.

KABUNA OKAY.

HE WITH US, REMEMBER?

- FLOYD! THIS IS NO TIME FOR GAMES!

LET GO!

AW, COME ON, FLOYD!

- [chattering]

- O MIGHTY KABUNA, TANAMASHU GIVE YOU GREETINGS.

GREETINGS...

KABUNA.

HUH?

MIGHTY KABUNA,

BAD DAUGHTER WISH YOU SPEAK.

YOU LIKE THIS?

UH-HUH.

BAD DAUGHTER,

GREAT KABUNA SAY SPEAK OKAY.

- GREAT KABUNA, SPEAK TO ME.

SPEAK SO NOT ONLY I HEAR,

NOT ONLY FATHER HEAR,

BUT EVERYONE HEAR.

- OKAY, FLOYD, I'M LOOSE. YOU CAN LET GO NOW.

OHH!

- [hooting]

- SPEAK OF TANAMASHU.

SPEAK OF WOMAN GOT RIGHTS.

SPEAK OF ALL THINGS.

WE WAIT PATIENTLY, GREAT KABUNA.

THIS IS WHAT ROB HONEY CALL "CUE."

WOOF-WOOF.

- WOOF-WOOF?

- GREAT KABUNA, MAYBE ONE WORD?

MAYBE SMALL WHISPER?

- AH!

KABUNA PRETTY SMART, EH?

both: [laughing]

- GRAB WOMAN!

[screaming]

- [laughing]

- [over loudspeaker] JUST A MINUTE, CHARLIE!

HOLD IT!

- HUH?

- DROP THOSE GIRLS!

TANAMASHU, LISTEN!

KABUNA NOW SPEAK TO ALL PEOPLE.

[whispering] KEEP IT UP, FLOYD.

KABUNA SAY WOMAN GOT RIGHTS!

- WHAT'S THE MATTER HERE?

THIS NOT KABUNA VOICE!

NO!

ONLY TANAMASHU CAN HEAR KABUNA VOICE!

- NOT TRUE!

KABUNA PLENTY TIRED TANAMASHU PUT WORDS IN MOUTH.

- TANAMASHU THINK MAYBE THIS SOME KIND OF TRICK.

WHY GREAT KABUNA SPEAK WHITE MEN FASHION, EH?

- KABUNA SPEAK MANY TONGUES.

SPEAK WITH FLAMING TONGUE OF ANGER!

- [gasps]

[shouting in native language]

[overlapping shouts]

- KABUNA SPEAK WITH ICY BREATH OF CONTEMPT!

- [grunting]

[women giggling, Tanamashu shivering]

- WHAT YOU SAY NOW, BAD CHIEF TANAMASHU?

- I SAY YOU FAKE!

- WHAT YOU CALL KABUNA, KABUNA CALL YOU DOUBLE!

- I SAY YOU ONE BIG FINISH-UP LIAR!

- GET ON THE WATER, FLOYD.

NOW YOU MAKE KABUNA PLENTY MAD.

GET THE WATER.

COME ON, FLOYD. TURN IT ON!

[water whooshing]

[Tanamashu groans]

[shouting in native language]

- [laughing] RIGHT ON TARGET!

POUR IT ON! KEEP IT COMIN'!

MORE PRESSURE, FLOYD!

DON'T BE AFRAID OF IT!

[hose creaking]

- OOH!

[creaking]

- HEY! NO! WHOA!

AAH AAH AAH!

- AHH!

- OH, ROB!

- FLOYD!

FLOYD!

- AH-HA-AHH!

- FLOYD, TURN IT DOWN!

- [shouting indistinctly]

- FLOYD!

HEY, FLOYD! TURN IT DOWN!

- [screams]

- AAH! AAH!

- [groans]

OOH!

- HEY!

NO!

AAH!

DOWN, YOU IDIOT!

DOWN! - [screeching]

- WHOA!

TURN IT DOWN!

[whistle blows]

GO ON! GET OUT OF HERE!

PLAN "B"!

ALL RIGHT, YOU GUYS.

YOU WANT KABUNA GET TOUGH? HUH?

BACK!

[laughs]

- [growling]

- HOLD IT! HOLD IT.

KABUNA WATCH EVERY MOVE.

- GRAB HIM! GET HIM!

- FLOYD.

FLOYD, TURN ON THE WATER. - [muttering native language]

- [laughing]

- HOLD IT! HOLD IT.

FLOYD! TELL KABUNA HIT THE WATER!

- [hooting]

[hoots]

[hooting]

[chattering]

- [mutters]

- YOU DARE DEFY GREAT GOD KABUNA?

[grunts] BACK!

GREAT KABUNA, TURN ON THE WATER!

ANYBODY, HIT THE WATER!

DON'T BOTHER ME, FLOYD. I'M BUSY.

[coughs]

- [growls]

[warriors muttering]

- [muttering]

- [explosions]

- [screeching]

[flares whistling] - HEY!

LOOK OUT! BACK!

[ricochets and explosions]

OW!

CUT IT OUT, WILL YA?

KABUNA SAY HE READY TO BLOW!

- [grunting] - AAH!

- [screaming]

RUN! GO!

- I TOUGH CHIEF TANAMASHU!

TANAMASHU NEVER RUN!

[ricochets]

- [groans]

- [straining] LET GO!

- [speaking native language]

- AAH!

[whistling and explosions]

- AAH! WAIT!

WAIT FOR ME!

TANAMASHU...ALWAYS RUNS!

WAIT! WAIT!

[traps springing]

WHERE?

WHERE EVERYBODY GO?

WHAT'S THE MAT-- [gasps]

- [laughing]

- [shouting in native language]

[shouting in native language]

HUH?

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

[shouting in native language]

[water gurgling]

[shouting in native language]

- HE MY FATHER. I PULL.

- OKAY.

- [screaming and muttering in native language]

[shouting in native language]

[groans]

[shouting in native language]

[muttering in native language]

- OOH!

- [sighs]

[speaking native language]

HEY!

[shouting in native language]

[shouting in native language]

[screaming]

[shouting in native language]

[gasps]

[whistle blows]

[Tanamashu crying]

- YOU, UH, HAVE ENOUGH?

YOU SAY UNCLE?

- [crying, speaking native language]

- FATHER SAY UNCLE.

[rumbling]

[explosion]

LOOK!

KABUNA SMILE!

[native drums playing, women shouting]

? ?

- HEY.

VERY GOOD, OKAY.

- OH, THANK YOU.

SAY, UH, TANAMASHU, UH,

I'M SORRY ABOUT THOSE BOATS.

- OH.

- WELL, IT MUST TAKE A LONG TIME

TO HOLLOW OUT ONE OF THOSE THINGS.

- [speaking native language]

- YEAH.

- KUAGA,

- KA-WA-WA?

- KWAGIKA.

- OH, KWALIGI.

[laughing]

[women shouting]

- YOU KNOW, SHE IS A WONDERFUL GIRL.

- [grunts]

- SHE'S GONNA MAKE SOME HEADHUNTER

A GREAT LITTLE WIFE SOMEDAY.

- [laughs]

SURE! SURE, GO!

GO DANCE WITH BAD DAUGHTER!

GO! [laughs]

- [laughs] HEY!

[Tanamashu laughing]

HEY! WISE GUY DANCE OKAY!

[laughing]

WISE GUY DANCE PRETTY GOOD MARRIAGE DANCE!

[laughing]

- MARRIAGE DANCE?

UH, NO, NO. WAIT A MINUTE.

PLEASE, PLEASE.

- TANAMASHU DON'T LOSE DAUGHTER, NO!

TANAMASHU GOT WISE-GUY SON!

[laughing]

- AAH!

[Tanamashu laughing, drums stop]

- OH, I'M-- I'M TERRIBLY SORRY.

I--I...

UM, LOOK, I DIDN'T MEAN...

UM, WEDNESDAY, I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU.

I MEAN, SHE--

SHE'S A CHIEF'S DAUGHTER.

WELL, I MEAN, YOU KNOW THAT.

? UM-DIDDLE-DIDDLE, UM-DIDDLE-AY ?

? UM-DIDDLE-DIDDLE, UM-DIDDLE-EE ? ?

- IF YOU DAUGHTER TANAMASHU, GO GET HIM!

[laughing]

- OKAY, I DO.

- [laughing]

- MMM!

[helicopter hovering]

CHOPPER!

HEY!

HELP! HELP!

HEY! HELP!

HELP! HEY!

HEY! HELP!

HELP! COME ON!

YOU DUMB...COME ON! CAN'T YOU READ?

AAH!

HELP! YA-- COME ON!

HEY!

COME ON! COME ON! THE NATIVES ARE AFTER ME!

- HEY, THERE'S A GUY DOWN THERE

PUTTING OUT A DISTRESS SIGNAL.

- YEAH? WELL, TAKE IT EASY. YOU KNOW THE RULES.

DON'T MEDDLE WITH THE AFFAIRS OF THE NATIVES.

- I DON'T THINK THIS GUY IS A NATIVE.

AND THOSE GIRLS LOOK LIKE THEY'RE GONNA CREAM HIM!

- GIRLS? - WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO?

- LET'S CHECK IT OUT.

- HEY! HEY!

AAH! THEY'RE COMING!

LOOK! LOOK! THEY'RE GONNA KILL ME!

YOU GUYS, LOOK OVER THERE!

HELP! I'M NAVY!

LOOK, I'M NAVY! OH, PLEASE HURRY!

THEY'RE COMIN'! [makes slashing sounds]

HELP!

- OKAY, I'M HOOKED UP.

- HURRY! HURRY!

AAH! HURRY UP!

OHH!

HEY!

OOH!

- HAUL HIM UP!

- TAKE IT UP!

- WATCH IT!

- I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE,

BUT I SURE DO ADMIRE YOUR STYLE.

THOSE CHICKS WEREN'T ABOUT TO LET YOU GO.

- HEY, DON'T I KNOW YOU?

CRUSOE. LIEUTENANT CRUSOE.

- YEAH. LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

THOSE GIRLS--

OH, WAIT! WE GOTTA GO BACK.

BACK?

YOU'VE GOTTA BE OUT OF YOUR SKULL.

THOSE PEOPLE ARE DANGEROUS.

- I'M SORRY. WE'VE GOT TO.

THERE'S ANOTHER GUY BACK THERE

MORE IMPORTANT THAN I AM.

- LOWER AWAY!

- BE RIGHT BACK!

FLOYD!

FLOYD, WHERE ARE YA?

FLOYD?

GET OUT OF THERE, YOU COWARD.

BOY, A BIG HERO YOU TURNED OUT TO BE.

WE GOTTA MOVE.

THAT GIRLS' OLYMPIC TEAM IS COMING--THEY GOT SPEARS!

COME ON. THEY WANNA KILL US, BOY. MOVE!

YOU WANNA BE AN APE-SKIN RUG?

- [hooting]

- COME ON! COME ON!

FLOYD, GET UP THERE!

GO ON! GET UP. GET UP, FLOYD!

TAKE IT UP!

[helicopter straining]

TAKE IT UP!

WEDNESDAY, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!

TAKE IT UP!

WEDNESDAY!

WEDNESDAY, I DON'T DESERVE YA!

GOOD-BYE, WEDNESDAY!

[spear whooshes]

GOOD-BYE, WEDNESDAY.

[whoosh]

"AND THAT'S JUST ABOUT THE WAY IT WAS, DEAR."

"WE HAD A GREAT RECEPTION ON THE CARRIER.

"OF COURSE, IT WASN'T FOR ME.

"IT WAS ALL FOR FLOYD,

"OUR NATION'S FIRST HERO OF OUTER SPACE.

THEY'D BEEN SEARCHING FOR HIM FOR YEARS."

- WELCOME ABOARD, LIEUTENANT.

WELL, FLOYD, I'M DELIGHTED TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

YOU MUST HAVE HAD SOME EXPERIENCE.

- SIR, I KNOW YOU'RE VERY ANXIOUS

TO HEAR ABOUT THE WHOLE STORY.

THE WHOLE THING STARTED--

- UH, LATER, LIEUTENANT, IF YOU DON'T MIND.

EXCUSE ME.

FLOYD, I'VE GOT SOME PEOPLE I WANT YOU TO MEET,

AND THEN WE'VE GOT A LOT OF THINGS TO DO.

- THE PRESIDENT'S ON THE PHONE, SIR.

HE WANTS TO TALK TO HIM.

- CAPTAIN? SIR?

I'D LIKE TO GIVE YOU A FULL REPORT.

IT'S REALLY AN INTERESTING STORY.

I WAS FLYING ABOUT 16--

- HEY, MISTER.

HEY, MISTER, THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD OUTFIT YOU GOT ON THERE.

MIND IF I TAKE A PICTURE TO SEND MY GIRL?

- NO, FINE. GO AHEAD.

- SAY, WHAT ARE YOU,

SOME KIND OF A HERMIT OR SOMETHING?

- I'M GLAD YOU ASKED THAT.

YOU KNOW, THIS WHOLE THING STARTED

OH, SOME MONTHS AGO.

I WAS FLYING ALONG ABOUT 16,000 FEET, I'D SAY.

- SAY, EXCUSE ME, WILL YA, MACK? THEY'RE TAKING THE CHIMP AWAY,

AND I WANT TO GRAB A PICTURE OF HIM.

OH, GO AHEAD.

[military march music]

? ?

"ANYWAY, DEAR, THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT HAPPENED.

"I'LL BE HOME SOON.

ALL MY LOVE, ROB."

Captioning by CaptionMax