Original subtitles

A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES

I'm on my own here! What a shitty team!

- Here. - Yes, go on, shoot!

Hello.

Hi!

- Hi. - Right, you're Lisa. I'm Folke's mum.

- Folke. The new boy. - Oh yes, that's right!

- He seems really sweet. - Thanks.

- Has he settled in OK? - Well...

- Is he having a hard time? - Well, I...

I think it's a bit rowdy in class.

We were actually just talking about that.

Yes... It feels like it started off quite well

at the beginning of term, but then it...

Eddie's had a bit of a tough time, and it's come out in the classroom.

But he's a really lovely boy! Maybe it was too much for him when you got married.

- Or what do you think? - I don't know.

- Congratulations, by the way. - It was so beautiful.

Was the weather nice?

Eddie, let's go, sweetheart!

Happens all the time.

Dinner time!

- You know Ellen Söderberg? - At KPMG, right?

When she remarried, everyone thought that Björn would freak out,

but he mostly seemed relieved. The kids were really pissed off though.

Kids become little moralists when it comes to divorce.

- No, not Eddie. Bye. - Let go!

- Can I play for a bit longer? - No.

Let go! Let go, you bitch!

THE BONUS FAMILY

Hey...

Sweetie, what's wrong? Did something happen?

- I don't want a bloody assistant. - What?

- What do you mean? - I don't want a bloody supervisor.

They're telling me I'm getting an assistant. I don't want one.

Hey...

- I'm glad you could make it. - We didn't really have a choice.

I was only joking.

- Did you have a good summer? - It was lovely! Nice and quiet.

- Nice and quiet. - Was it nice and quiet for Eddie too?

Eddie's doing great! It was his best summer ever. It's lovely to see him.

It's lovely to see how much they grow during the summer, and not just...

They mature, get older, and take on responsibility. He's...

But you must have noticed that in the classroom, Sofie.

Definitely, all children mature over the summer, so...

- Especially Eddie. - But with a new term ahead of us,

we were wondering what your plan is for Eddie.

- Plan? - In regard to getting extra support.

- You mean an assistant? - Yes.

Eddie doesn't want an assistant!

I don't see the problem. Things are fine, as I understand it.

- Fine...? - That's our understanding, isn't it?

That it's getting better, and he's more focused during class and less disruptive.

- Right, Sofie? - Sure, some of the time, Lisa.

But he still takes up a lot of my focus,

and I don't feel that I have enough time for the other children.

Maybe you need an assistant.

If you're struggling to focus...

- Do you have to crack jokes? - Maybe it wasn't a joke.

Brilliant.

- Step outside if you need to. - It wouldn't help.

Filip!

What was so brilliant?

That he turned it around and implied that the big problem is you, Sofie.

Hold on. "The big problem." Do you mean Eddie?

It's Sofie. In this scenario, Sofie is the one who needs an assistant.

I'd like to see that.

Filip, we have to move on.

- Let's pull ourselves together and... - No!

We don't need an assistant. Eddie doesn't want it, neither do we.

- We're done here, let's go. - Hey...

Why don't we...? We have a lot to discuss.

- Sorry, I've calmed down now. - Should we make another appointment?

For next week?

Contact the parents and tell them that we won't be getting an assistant.

- Sure, I'll deal with it. - Great.

Right...

- Bianca! What are you doing? - My dance clothes are in Eddie's locker.

- In Eddie's locker? - Yes.

- Does he borrow them? - No, Mum always gets confused.

- And when I move to Dad's... - Why not live with just one of them?

- There's no point. - Why not?

I don't want to bring it up, they'll make a big deal about it.

- But who do you want to live with? - Dad.

- Why not your mum? - Her new husband's a control freak.

Eddie's getting more and more annoying, and the baby's crying every night.

- I can't stand it. - It's better than my house.

- It's always dead silent. - Sounds bloody heavenly.

Look. Isn't that your mum?

How the hell can he say that Eddie's the big problem? It's crazy!

- That's not what he said... - It's such an exaggeration.

Yes, he was intense last year, but he's so much calmer now. It's bloody retarded!

- You have to talk to her. - No, she'll be really upset.

Who cares? It's your life. It's important, isn't it? Go and talk to her.

Do it, it's important. I'll get your stuff from the locker.

- OK. - Where is it?

- Mum! - Hi, sweetie!

- Can we go for a coffee? - Of course!

- Is there any food? - Yes, have a sandwich.

There's cheese in the fridge. Glad you're eating more now that you're training.

But, mum, I don't want to go to training.

- Come on, William. - My leg's really sore.

No, you walked normally just then.

You don't see how I walk, you're always on your computer!

This bad attitude of yours isn't something I'm keen on.

Martial arts is silly, and you think so as well.

You can't give up this easily. Dad's spent lots of money.

I can come with you if you like. Do you want cheese on your sandwich?

- William! - No, you don't need to watch over me.

I have to make sure that nobody hurts my little darling again. Cheese?

Yes.

There. What a lovely surprise this was. There you go.

- No, thanks. - But you love cinnamon rolls.

I'm good.

Listen. Don't feel bad that we're spending time together without Dad.

- But... - He pulls this feel-bad-for-me-face.

- Just ignore it. - OK.

He wants you to do things on your own. I know he's happy about this.

Just let it go. Do you understand? Good.

I think this is lovely.

Did you want to talk about anything in particular?

No.

- Have you got a new boyfriend? - No!

OK, sorry.

- How's the dancing going? - Well.

- Are you throwing them in? - I think so.

It's fine.

Ow!

What are you doing? Tantra or forest yoga?

-Not exactly. -What the hell's tantra?

- Come off it, you know what tantra is. - Get down.

- You have to take care of the fruit. - I don't know, do you?

Isn't nuclear waste more important? They're my plums, you don't live here.

When this is your house, part of the deal is to take care of the fruit.

That's the way it is, and that's the way it's always been.

This is exactly the kind of stuff I wanted to avoid. That's why I moved to a flat.

- Did something happen to your knee? - It was just a bit painful.

- Why didn't you tell me? - Because you always make a fuss!

- Calm down! Do you want a massage? - Please!

Can I speak to my son?

How did the meeting about Eddie go?

It went well. Well, I don't know. It was a bit chaotic.

Do you have to make...compote? Can't you make pie that we actually eat?

- We do both. - Make pie.

- Ask Gugge. - No, make pie.

You've chewed on it!

- I feel really bad right now. - Don't.

But I do. I feel wretched, actually. I'm overcome by self-loathing.

You can't think like that. You can't control laughter, it's instinctive.

I'm not talking about that, I'm talking about this.

My whole life I've promised myself to never jump on the exercise bandwagon.

Now I'm doing it.

- So we'll go easy. - No!

The whole point of exercise is to exert yourself. Let's do it.

Take it easy, wait for me.

Hello.

- Look, you've made friends already. - He's the new boy at school.

- This isn't for me. - Can't you take it?

- Hi, William. How's your leg? - It's OK.

Hi. I'm Anders, Folke's dad.

He's just started in...William's class.

- Hi, I'm Katja. - So William likes martial arts too?

Not exactly. I had to drag him here, but they need exercise.

- They do get quite a bit of screen time. - Are you kidding me?

- I'm handing this in. - I'll see you at the meeting.

- What meeting? - With the parents at school.

- Didn't you get the email? - About a parents' meeting?

No, it's just some parents meeting up because of...

- It's to do with this rowdy boy in class. - The rowdy boy?

- Eddie? - Exactly. He's difficult.

We're going to work together to see if we can get rid of him.

Without speaking to his parents? Pretty aggressive move.

Right, a bit.

But from what I hear, he's a bit of a lost cause.

- So you're getting rid of him. Nice. - I don't... Well, we're new to the class.

- Could you forward that email to me? - Sure, I'll do it now.

- Great. - But don't tell Branco.

No, I was just...

Do you want a bit more? A refill?

- Well-deserved. - Yes, we ran at least 500 metres.

- Everything's relative. - No, not length. Length's a distance.

It's a constant, a measurement. We ran 800 metres,

because we started over there. I can see it.

For me, it's not about length. It's a betrayal. A betrayal of myself.

- Which I now have to compensate for. - Clever.

I'll start breaking my promises too, so I can drink more compensatory beer.

It doesn't work like that. You're knowingly deceiving yourself.

You should punish yourself by not drinking when you should be allowed to.

Leave it!

- Majvor at the school is doing just that. - What?

Leaving. The head wanted some new blood, so she's retiring early.

- How nice for her. - Don't you get what this means?

- Her position will be available. - Deputy head? No thanks.

The only thing worse than arguing with students is arguing with teachers.

Think about your wallet.

Patrik, you'd be perfect for the job.

Really? Thanks.

You're perfectly warped.

- Warped? - You're conventional.

You have rules, structure, and grids. You're good at that,

but in that you've got something else as well, something more diffuse.

You're not quite an intellectual slut, but something along those lines.

- Right. Thanks. - This is inside information.

So keep it to yourself. But apply.

I'm not just saying that so I'll get to see your lovely little face next door.

It would be awesome. We could foliate the inside of the doors.

We could catch glimpses of each other all day in these diffuse reflections.

It would be awesome. A deputy head should be able to push that through.

- It might even be the first thing you do. - Something's up, I have to go.

- Do you want to talk about it? - No.

- Patrik? Can I have your beer? - Sure.

Thanks.

One, two, three, four...

Hey, Mum! Come on.

- Hello? - That's crazy! Who did you speak to?

Don't try to get more out of me, I've told you all I know.

Thanks for telling me.

I'm a bit surprised myself. I've been a bit distracted recently.

Who initiated the meeting? That new dad?

I don't know, ask Katja. Calm down, so we can think about what to do.

They're not going to make Eddie change schools!

Charyot. Kyung ye. Well done, hit the showers!

- Take care. - Keep trying.

- Hi. - Nice to see you.

I almost felt a bit invisible there.

When it's time for learning, I focus on the kids.

So when is it time for yearning?

- You must yearn for me a little bit. - You're funny.

- Thanks. - You use a lot of prehistoric words.

Yearning... Is that a fishing term?

You hit the nail on the head there.

- Has that fucking dad left? - Hi.

- Where is he? - I don't know, let's go outside.

Wait outside while I talk to William.

Why don't you just talk to the school? It's their duty to deal with this.

- We did, and it wasn't a good idea. - Why not?

Can you please just send me that email?

- Done. I have to get William. - Thank you.

You have to report it, it's a crime.

It's not a crime to have a meeting.

But surely the school can't allow it. It's bullying!

- The school doesn't know anything. - Patrik knows.

- Maybe he can talk to them. - Don't get Patrik involved.

- But he works there, he could stop it. - I don't want to.

- Why not? - Because I can't talk to him about this.

- What, did he say anything? - I just don't want to.

No! I have to hang the laundry out to dry.

- What, now? - Yes. This is upsetting me.

- You've got a sore knee, don't bother. - Who else would do it?

Go on then, if you really have to.

- Martin, listen to me. Seriously. - I don't want to hang the laundry out.

It's not about that, it's about Eddie.

Why don't you just throw a little party? Give them some wine and cheese.

Invite them all! Spoil them! I promise they'll...

- What are you talking about? - They'll spoil you back, give and take.

This is a really serious meeting about Eddie, our son.

Do you remember the old man who wouldn't cut the tree down?

We gave him some wine, and what happened? He agreed.

- He was an alcoholic. - OK, he might have been.

But he was cool. After a few drinks, he was lovely.

I feel empty.

- What should we say to them? - I don't know. We could just kill them.

No, seriously.

I guess we'll have to say that we've worked out a plan with the school.

Right, but we don't have a plan.

Well, we did actually speak to them, even if it didn't go that well.

We have to make the parents understand that they can't do this on their own.

It's a vigilante group against an 11-year-old.

- It's crazy. - Yes, it is.

The school should deal with this, and we should discuss it with them.

- Good. You say that, and I'll kill them. - No! You're going to stay calm.

We have to stay calm, so the parents realise that they're the crazy ones.

Yes.

God, this is the most messed-up thing I've ever experienced.

Hi. What's happening?

We're just trying to sort out our schedules and stuff.

- OK. Are you eating with us? - No, I'm going home to Patrik and Lo.

- But thank you, sweetie. - Fish. Would you like fish?

You'll be OK for a while, right?

Come on, don't look so glum. You know I have meetings at awkward times.

How urgent can it be to have a roundabout put in?

Really urgent. People drive in them, ambulances need to get through...

- Hello? - Did you hear more about the meeting?

- What meeting? - The one about Eddie.

I've already told you all I know.

Look, there's no need to sound quite so irked.

- Hello, Katja? - Was that Dad?

Yes. It was about Eddie, and apparently half of the world needed to get involved.

I have to go. There's lots of ice cream. I'll be back in a couple of hours. Bye.

- Do you like P. C. Jersild? - Sorry?

P. C. Jersild.

I thought you asked if I like PCs.

OK, so these aren't your books?

No, not those. They belong to Robin.

He doesn't still live at home, does he?

I'm the only one who lives here. Everyone else has moved out.

Do you want a biscuit?

No.

You might have to do a karate throw if I'm going to...

I don't do karate.

- I'm sure you know another type of throw. - Are you brave enough?

You and William seem so fragile.

You've really got a lot of cushions here. A bed, maybe...

They forgot their toothbrushes when they moved.

Come here, gorgeous. You can have one too if you like.

If there hadn't been a million other ones, that would've been really sweet.

- What about Lo? - Lo?

- We can't take her to the meeting. - You're not going to the meeting.

- I thought you said we were going. - Martin and I.

- I think it'll help if I come along. - No, I don't want you there.

I don't know where you stand in this. Sorry, but that's how I feel.

You know exactly where I stand. I'm on your side.

- I mean, I do think that... - That Eddie should have an assistant.

That's what you think.

Sweetie, are you still awake? I'm home.

You can go to sleep now.

There.

- Have you been to training? - Of course not, silly.

You smell like Branco.

I haven't been to training. Go to sleep.

Sweet dreams.

- Do you want another sandwich? - No, I'm stuffed.

- You don't need to leave yet. - I'm gaming.

15 minutes, max.

- Dad? - Yes?

I've been thinking about where to live. Can I stay with you full-time?

Sure thing. Mi casa moussaka, or whatever the Greeks said.

Thanks, that's great.

Did something happen?

No, I just don't like moving around all the time.

- Have you talked to your mum? - Can you do it for me?

No, no way!

I need your help. You need to babysit Eddie tonight, I've got a meeting.

- Are you going on a date? - What? Definitely not.

OK, listen.

- Don't tell Eddie. - I won't.

Some psycho parents want to remove him from the school.

He doesn't want an assistant, so they want to get rid of him.

- They're trying to force him out. - That's fucked up!

- Yes. - What do you mean, he doesn't want to?

- He doesn't want an assistant. - It's not up to him, he's just a kid.

If it was up to him, he wouldn't even go to school.

- OK, but do you want to babysit or not? - What for? He won't leave his game.

Don't bother then.

Why do people complain about gaming? It's the babysitter of the year.

Someone said ADHD, but I don't think so.

- Stay calm, OK? - Sure.

- It's for Eddie. - I know.

On Dr. Phil last week, there was a similar kid who was really difficult.

I saw that too, but it's not the kid's fault, it's the parents'.

Hello! Here we are, surprise guests.

Are you having a party? We weren't invited.

Maybe you don't invite white trash, or whatever you called us.

Hello?

Hi. What's going on?

I just needed to get something.

- What are you doing tonight? - Nothing.

OK. I really need to go to the shop, so could you watch Lo for half an hour?

- She's asleep. - I can't, I have to go.

You just said you weren't doing anything tonight.

Please.

- I don't have the energy. - To watch TV while she sleeps?

- But... OK, for 500 kronor. - Are you crazy?

You charge 1,000 an hour to babysit your own sister?

- She's my half-sister, actually. - I'll give you 100.

- It's really good money. - 200.

OK. 200 if you stay for at least an hour. I don't want to rush back.

- I'm not changing dirty nappies. - No, she's asleep!

- Just so you know. - Good.

- You didn't want an assistant, right? - We're working with the school on this.

We'll sort this out with them, not...

Wait. The school's saying that you don't want to deal with it.

Why are you so rude? You heard her.

You're the one who's rude.

Is it any wonder? You set up a meeting and didn't invite us. That's rude.

- What did you and the school agree on? - Her husband works at the school.

So we have someone on the inside.

Just answer the question. What have you agreed on?

It's all-out war in there, but it's quite entertaining.

Two crazy parents have a difficult kid who's ruining things for other kids.

Just tell us what's been agreed.

No, because I don't work at the school. Do I look like I do?

Lisa, can I just ask you something? Isn't it...

Don't Lisa me, you cunt!

There's no reason to call each other names...

What should I call someone who goes behind my back and acts like a cunt?

- Calm down. - Sorry, I didn't realise it was you.

Good, now you can hear what your wife sounds like.

She's been my wife too, and I know exactly what she sounds like.

We were married for 14 years.

She might not use proper formal words that you approve of,

but they mean something. Always.

It's gone really quiet over there. Nice.

Can we have a sensible discussion?

That's hard to do when someone's attacking you with profanities.

You're using profanities while we're here to talk about our children.

Yes, the school's taking care of that, isn't that right, Patrik?

What? Yes. Yes, we are.

OK, how?

I can't go into details, but we're working on it.

No, please do. As parents of the children affected by this, we'd like to know.

I know, and all I can say right now is that we're discussing it internally.

- I don't believe that for a second. - You think we're lying. Fucking idiot!

- Calm down. - What is she saying? I am calm!

Let's go. We're not getting anywhere. They're morons, the lot of them.

- Bye. - Bye-bye.

These chips are so good.

- Lovely to get some family time with you. - Sure, when it suits you.

- What did you say? - Sure, when it suits you.

- What do you mean? - When it suits you, we have family time.

- Whenever I want it, you have a meeting. - Oh, William...

I sometimes have to go to meetings in the evenings, you know that.

Are you upset about something else? Is it the training that you don't like?

What if I say you don't have to do it any more?

Will you stop going as well?

I'm full. Thanks for dinner.

I'm glad that you came by.

When you said that thing about the school, they listened.

I'm not sure how I feel about it. Your question caught me off guard.

You did great! You didn't miss a beat.

- Where's Lo? - With Bianca.

- I need to get back to Eddie. - I can give you a lift.

Are you sure?

I'll take my bike.

Hi! What happened? I've called a thousand times.

I didn't bring my phone.

How long does it take to cycle four blocks?

What happened? Come and sit down.

What is it?

I went back to talk to them.

No, no, no, Patrik...

I felt pressured when Martin forced me to confirm your lies.

- OK, and? - I felt like I was risking my job.

So you'd rather risk Eddie?

You don't even have a bloody job, you're on paternity leave.

What did you tell them exactly? Tell me!

- Can you listen to me? - Yes, tell me.

I finally got them to agree to stop trying to get rid of Eddie,

if we get him an assistant.

What the fuck did you do?!

- You'll wake Lo up. - He doesn't want one!

You should be grateful. I've saved Eddie. They would've kept trying to push him out!

- You really don't get it. - What don't I get?

He doesn't want this, Patrik! So much is wrong here, I don't know where to start!

- Don't call me Patrik! - It's your name!

- Don't say it like that, I hate it! - God, you're sick in the head.

I am? I've saved Eddie, who's caused all sorts of trouble!

We're done here. Thank you, and good night!

Sorry.

I'm sorry for saying that Eddie has caused trouble.

I know you want to protect him, but an assistant would be good for him.

It's not about the assistant.

It's about the fact that you should be on my side and loyal to me.

Honey, I am loyal to you.

- No, you're not. - Yes, I am.

Do you think I want to argue like this?

I would love to stop, but I can't, because I am loyal,

and because you need to know that you can't just be mates with your kids.

Do you understand?

- Can you please sleep in our bed? - No, I'm sleeping here tonight.

Then I'll sleep here too.

He means well, he just crossed the line big time.

Hello?

Well...

Patrik might be right.

Maybe he does need an assistant.

But Eddie doesn't want one! He says he would feel like an idiot.

Let's go eat.

He's only a little kid. Maybe he can't make those decisions.

I'm going to lunch.

I understand it could be a good thing, it's not that.

But it feels horrible to force him.

I could have done with someone who helped me when I was little,

with the bullying and all that crap.

- Were you bullied? - No, I was the bully.

God, you're sick!

I was a bloody asshole.

I could have done with someone who told me it wasn't OK.

Then maybe I, not to mention my poor victims, would have felt better today.

You're sick too.

Sickeningly gorgeous.

You are. Sad but true.

I have to go, or I'll get fired.

Right, who'd be brave enough to fire you?

I'll speak to you later.

Hi, sweetie. Nice to see you.

- No. - What's wrong?

What was that? You were kissing another woman.

- It was just Anja. - What do you mean?

- Anja, my ex-wife. - She seemed more like a wife than an ex.

- Are you jealous? - Should I be?

Listen. She's the mother of my children and means a lot to me.

- But how much? - We don't have sex any more.

Let's go upstairs.

What do you mean "don't have sex any more"?

- I only have sex with you. - So why mess around with your ex?

- She's important to me. - Then get back together with her.

- She's still got her toothbrush, perfect. - All divorces don't end in war.

- Like you and... - Patrik.

Right. Anja is an amazing woman. I'm certain you'd like her.

Thanks. I already have one bonus family I don't want.

I don't really know how I feel about us any more.

This is just too messy. See you around.

Hi, sweetie. How are you?

I'm fine, but I need to talk to you about something. Is this a good time?

- Of course, I always have time for you. - I hope you won't get upset.

OK, penalty!

Oops, sorry.

- How did it go? Was she OK with it? - I think so.

- What about you? - It went well.

He got a bit pissed off, but I just had to be firm.

- Well done, Dad. - Thanks.

- OK, take it easy, Messi. - What do you mean, "Messi"?

The king is Zlatan.

Hey, Eddie... If Zlatan was an assistant, would you like to have him?

Definitely, Zlatan rules.

But if you could choose anyone? Wolverine, Batman...?

I'm not five. If I'm having an assistant, it has to be a real person who's good.

OK, that's fine. We'll get someone good. The best.

Right?

No!

You're not reading that one.

You want to watch a film?

What's wrong?

Have you been crying?

Bianca just called. She wants to live with Martin.

Temporarily, but still... She'll leave home soon.

Did she say why?

She doesn't like going back and forth, which I can understand, but...

Me too! She's nearly 17.

Yes, but I think there are other elements here that are tough on her.

- I get that. - I feel like the worst mum in the world.

You're the best mum in the world.

We've decided to get Eddie an assistant.

Really? When did you make that decision?

Martin said it was a good idea, and I think I agree.

What? This is exactly what you wanted!

So when I suggest it, you give me hell, and when he says it, it's sensible?

- That feels a bit crap, to be honest. - It just had to sink in.

No, you don't trust me, because I'm not his real dad.

I'm sorry. That's not what I mean.

Hi. Things got a bit weird last time,

but I thought maybe we could have a chat and see...

- Who was that? - Jennifer.

- The cunt? - Did I say that?

- You said "cunt" twice. - God, I actually did.

Subtitles: Monika Stewart

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0