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♪ Into the Dark 2x06 ♪
Crawlers
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- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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Hey, guys.
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So I know my channel's been
off the radar for a while,
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and no, I wasn't
abducted by lizard people
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or sent to that top
secret CIA prison island,
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which by the way totally exists.
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I've just had to lay low for a while
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'cause, well, I think
the feds are watching me.
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And like, I mean, yeah,
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of course they're watching everybody,
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but I'm talking like
special ops task force
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kind of watching.
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And normally, I'd just lay low
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till the heat's off,
but... well, sometimes,
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the truth is more important than safety.
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So here goes.
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Okay.
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It all happened a year ago.
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St. Patrick's Day, actually.
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Coincidentally, the same day that
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a meteor crashed into
our town back in the '70s.
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It was supposed to just be
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a night of college kids getting drunk,
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but a lot of people died,
like, a lot of people.
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You little fucker, come on.
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Welcome to Emerald Springs
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Did I mention we love St. Patrick's Day?
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Yeah, Chicago has the
whole green river thing,
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but we do more of a green
river of puke thing.
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What else would you expect from
a town full of college kids?
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Or, as I call them, "customers"?
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Officer Sullivan, what's your 10 20?
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Yo, this is ridiculous.
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I could literally arrest
every single person
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on this street right now.
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Don't have enough
cells to hold them all.
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Just let them celebrate.
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Fuck me. You call this celebrating?
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I don't know what to tell you, rookie.
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You shoulda seen last year.
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A whole pledge class took green
shits on the courthouse lawn.
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You're fucking with me, right?
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Luck of the Irish, man.
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Shamrock shithole.
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Hey, Sullivan, just
make it through tonight
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and beers are on me, all right?
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Yeah, I don't think
I'm gonna be drinking
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for a while.
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All right, I'm gonna
head towards the college.
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Okay, after that, why don't you catch up
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with the Massacre?
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Just play babysitter and
make sure they don't all die.
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Let's go, kids.
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Evening, ladies.
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Word.
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Wow.
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Swing and a miss, Officer Fuckboy.
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Shit.
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Fuck.
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Better be drunk or high.
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Are you all right there?
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Are you okay there?
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The hell happened to your clothes, man?
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Okay.
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All right, hey.
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- What happened?
- Oh... hey... take it easy, yeah?
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You take something, hm?
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Drugs?
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Hey, are you... are you a student here?
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Say something, man.
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Okay, I know what you're thinking.
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And no, it's not zombies.
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People always think it's zombies,
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but they have a totally
different pathology.
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Just... you'll see.
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What the fuck?
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Like I said,
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it's gonna be a fucking crazy night.
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No fucking way!
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You ever heard of
the porcupine's dilemma?
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It's the one about those little guys
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who wanna cuddle up for warmth
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but they just keep poking each other.
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It basically means
getting close to people
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hurts like a bitch.
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This is Misty,
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and she's smack-dab in the middle of
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her own prickly situation.
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Up until a few weeks ago,
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she and Chloe were besties.
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At least, that's what she thought.
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_
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Happy St. Paddy's Day!
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_
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This is why I don't bother with friends.
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Too much baggage and very little upside.
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If there's anything my mom taught me,
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it's family first, yourself second,
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and fuck everyone else.
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But Misty's one of those normal girls
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who likes having people around.
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She's hoping that they
can patch things up
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the good old-fashioned way:
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binge drinking.
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Hey, what's up, Misty?
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And what better way
than an all-night pub crawl?
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They call this one the Massacre
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because nobody makes it out alive.
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Figuratively speaking, of course.
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You waitin' on this
motherfuckin' bartender?
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Stank.
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I'm waiting like 30 minutes for a shot.
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You know what?
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Fuck this, motherfuckers,
I'm the bartender now.
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Heads back, mouths open.
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One for you, two for you, cutie.
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Hey! And one for me.
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And here's the self-proclaimed
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master of ceremonies, Chloe.
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She loves to be the center of attention,
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and on a night like tonight,
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that's not necessarily a good thing.
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Misty and Chloe have
been attached at the hip
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since freshman year.
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But some shit went down a few weeks ago,
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and when Misty really needed a friend,
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Chloe was nowhere to be found.
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I mean, I'd kick her to the curb,
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but Misty's loyal.
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Or, I dunno, maybe just pathetic.
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Sláinte!
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Let's go!
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Hey, Chlo!
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Misty!
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You made it, girl!
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Oh, shit.
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That's amazing.
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That's fuckin' hilarious.
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Yeah, I think I'm finally ready to get
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out the house again.
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- I'm glad.
- Guess who?
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Um, probably some thirsty-ass nerd
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that won't stop following me around?
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More like the person who
just saved your dumb ass
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from getting locked out later.
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You dropped these at the last bar.
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- You're my hero.
- I know.
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I love you so much.
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Misty, do you know Yuejin?
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She just transferred
here from New York City!
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She's fancy!
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No, I don't think...
I don't think we've met.
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We have. I'm in three of your classes.
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Meet Yuejin.
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She is kind of a bitch,
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always down for a good time,
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and has a closet full of
clothes in Chloe's size.
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All the makings of a brand-new sidekick.
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Weird.
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You're gonna love her.
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She's the third Musketeer.
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Oh yeah.
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Misty's definitely being replaced.
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Great!
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Welcome to the group.
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Thanks.
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By the way,
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I promise I'm in the story.
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Just wait.
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For the queen of the bar.
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Sorry, they told me to say that.
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Who did?
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- Fucking gross.
- Who, Aaron?
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Wait, you know Aaron already?
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Yeah. I go here.
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Aaron Hamilton.
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President of Beta Sigma Eta.
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He and the rest of these walking boners
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call themselves the Wolf Pack.
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Barf.
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Supposedly, they throw the best parties,
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but they've also got a reputation,
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the bad kind.
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Chloe.
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- What are you doing?
- Huh?
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- Chloe!
- What?
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No... ugh, no, Misty, he's
not like sexually harassing me
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or something.
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Aaron is a sex offender.
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Okay? And that pigfuck next to him,
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his name is Michael,
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- and you guys don't...
- We're not gonna do this
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tonight, Misty, okay?
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I'm not gonna ruin our St. Patrick's Day
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by drinking a roofied
green martini at 10:05 p.m.
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Bye-bye.
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Chloe!
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Oh my God.
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00:12:08,891 --> 00:12:10,416
But we do have to take a picture.
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- Of what?
- Of us!
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While we're so cute,
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before we're tear-streaked
vomit goblins.
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- Yeah!
- Okay.
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00:12:17,152 --> 00:12:19,137
Yeah, we haven't taken
one in a long time.
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00:12:19,138 --> 00:12:20,538
Yeah. Will you take it, please?
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00:12:20,539 --> 00:12:22,491
No, no, no, all of us.
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00:12:22,492 --> 00:12:23,545
Yeah.
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00:12:23,546 --> 00:12:24,629
And you have the longest arms,
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you should be the one to take it.
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Okay.
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00:12:29,432 --> 00:12:31,686
Yeah, St. Paddy!
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00:12:31,687 --> 00:12:33,899
- What? Who's "Drug Dealer"?
- _
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00:12:33,900 --> 00:12:35,109
Oh, I need this.
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00:12:35,110 --> 00:12:36,236
For real?
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I'm actually "Drug
Dealer" in your phone?
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00:12:38,743 --> 00:12:40,494
See? What'd I tell ya?
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00:12:40,495 --> 00:12:41,915
Yours truly.
219
00:12:41,916 --> 00:12:45,280
- Get in this pic!
- No, no, hard pass.
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00:12:45,281 --> 00:12:46,431
The more selfies you take,
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00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:48,123
the more data AI has
to create deep fakes
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00:12:48,124 --> 00:12:51,516
with your images.
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00:12:51,517 --> 00:12:53,395
So.
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00:12:53,396 --> 00:12:54,564
Anyway, uh...
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00:12:54,565 --> 00:12:55,901
let's get this underway, yeah?
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00:12:55,902 --> 00:12:57,220
- Yeah, yeah.
- Cool.
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00:12:57,221 --> 00:12:58,823
Uh, actually, maybe
you wanna go somewhere
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00:12:58,824 --> 00:13:00,326
less public?
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00:13:00,327 --> 00:13:02,915
It's St. Patrick's Day,
nobody gives a shit.
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00:13:05,750 --> 00:13:08,528
All right, here's a little pick-me-up...
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00:13:08,529 --> 00:13:09,647
Okay.
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00:13:09,648 --> 00:13:12,760
... for the Queen of the Crawl.
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00:13:12,761 --> 00:13:15,498
- Thanks.
- Thanks!
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00:13:15,499 --> 00:13:17,191
Who wants Adderall?
235
00:13:17,192 --> 00:13:19,053
Gonna be a long fuckin' night.
236
00:13:19,054 --> 00:13:20,826
Hey, over here!
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00:13:22,579 --> 00:13:24,457
Hey.
238
00:13:24,458 --> 00:13:26,336
You ever open one of those things up?
239
00:13:26,337 --> 00:13:28,142
They got like tiny
little microchips in there
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00:13:28,143 --> 00:13:30,219
that track your location, habit of use,
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00:13:30,220 --> 00:13:31,806
conversations, everything.
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00:13:31,807 --> 00:13:34,311
Isn't your phone doing that anyway?
243
00:13:34,312 --> 00:13:36,481
No.
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00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:37,542
Whoa.
245
00:13:37,543 --> 00:13:38,760
Who are you?
246
00:13:38,761 --> 00:13:40,120
I'm a local caregiver.
247
00:13:40,121 --> 00:13:41,522
It's my job to stay woke.
248
00:13:41,523 --> 00:13:44,092
Yeah, so I'm obviously
not like these princesses.
249
00:13:44,093 --> 00:13:45,751
I actually grew up in this town,
250
00:13:45,752 --> 00:13:47,838
and some of us need
to work for a living.
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00:13:47,839 --> 00:13:49,257
Plus, your girl here's off the grid,
252
00:13:49,258 --> 00:13:53,015
so that sort of limits
the professional options.
253
00:13:53,016 --> 00:13:56,313
But you can call me Shauna.
254
00:13:56,314 --> 00:13:57,983
It's a weird-ass holiday.
255
00:13:57,984 --> 00:13:59,737
I know, as if white people didn't have
256
00:13:59,738 --> 00:14:02,617
enough days on the calendar
to act like complete morons.
257
00:14:02,618 --> 00:14:04,496
If you wanna have some real fun,
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00:14:04,497 --> 00:14:06,782
I have this organic weed that's grown
259
00:14:06,783 --> 00:14:08,128
out by the clover fields,
260
00:14:08,129 --> 00:14:10,376
so it's laced with radiation
from that meteor that landed
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00:14:10,377 --> 00:14:11,844
there 40 years ago.
262
00:14:11,845 --> 00:14:13,807
That's a true story. Back in the '70s,
263
00:14:13,808 --> 00:14:15,852
this huge rock crashed
on the edge of town
264
00:14:15,853 --> 00:14:17,773
and my mom swears it
was actually carrying
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00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:19,902
larval stage
extraterrestrial metamorphs.
266
00:14:19,903 --> 00:14:21,655
The whole thing is a
big government cover-up,
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00:14:21,656 --> 00:14:26,373
but... I'm getting ahead of myself.
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00:14:26,374 --> 00:14:28,920
Oh, I got something Irish for you.
269
00:14:28,921 --> 00:14:30,924
Oh, you're serious.
270
00:14:30,925 --> 00:14:32,677
Yeah.
271
00:14:32,678 --> 00:14:36,435
Mm, I'm good, no thanks.
272
00:14:36,436 --> 00:14:37,520
Okay.
273
00:14:37,521 --> 00:14:40,401
Cool, uh... well, I'm gonna go,
274
00:14:40,402 --> 00:14:43,031
see if my sales pick up.
275
00:14:43,032 --> 00:14:44,492
Keep an eye out.
276
00:14:44,493 --> 00:14:46,163
- For what?
- For what?
277
00:14:46,164 --> 00:14:48,292
The end of the world!
278
00:14:50,672 --> 00:14:52,258
The end of the world!
279
00:14:53,486 --> 00:14:56,264
Listen up, you drunk motherfuckers.
280
00:14:56,265 --> 00:14:59,211
It's time for the tournament to begin.
281
00:15:01,825 --> 00:15:03,518
And we'll begin as we always do
282
00:15:03,519 --> 00:15:06,380
with a little game I like to call
283
00:15:06,381 --> 00:15:08,040
the Troubles.
284
00:15:15,149 --> 00:15:16,801
What's the Troubles?
285
00:15:16,802 --> 00:15:18,578
You'll see.
286
00:15:23,512 --> 00:15:26,625
Get in there, girl!
287
00:15:26,626 --> 00:15:28,820
Focus, focus...
288
00:15:28,821 --> 00:15:30,597
That's it!
289
00:15:30,598 --> 00:15:31,957
Yes, bitch, yes!
290
00:15:31,958 --> 00:15:33,609
You're getting it, you're getting it.
291
00:15:37,308 --> 00:15:40,104
Wait... anarchy, anarchy!
292
00:15:40,105 --> 00:15:41,231
Switch sides, switch sides.
293
00:15:41,232 --> 00:15:42,734
You have to go to the other side.
294
00:15:42,735 --> 00:15:44,362
Bitch, go to the other side!
295
00:15:44,363 --> 00:15:45,740
Why? Where?
296
00:15:48,121 --> 00:15:50,624
Okay, go!
297
00:15:50,625 --> 00:15:52,838
That's it, that's it, that's it!
298
00:15:54,133 --> 00:15:56,595
Get on your knees! You're a leprechaun!
299
00:15:59,728 --> 00:16:03,359
We got it! Pot of gold!
Throw your cups! Pot of gold!
300
00:16:08,369 --> 00:16:11,082
She's cool, right?
301
00:16:11,083 --> 00:16:13,880
Yeah, she's okay.
302
00:16:13,881 --> 00:16:15,967
That's high praise coming from you.
303
00:16:18,139 --> 00:16:21,729
You should come to
New York City with us.
304
00:16:21,730 --> 00:16:23,607
- What?
- For spring break.
305
00:16:23,608 --> 00:16:26,112
Her dad has a penthouse or
something in Central Park.
306
00:16:26,113 --> 00:16:28,283
It's gonna be fun.
307
00:16:28,284 --> 00:16:29,661
What happened to Cancun?
308
00:16:29,662 --> 00:16:32,291
I don't know, Cancun's
kinda like played-out, and
309
00:16:32,292 --> 00:16:33,669
I didn't know if that'd be your vibe
310
00:16:33,670 --> 00:16:35,506
'cause of your funk.
311
00:16:35,507 --> 00:16:38,303
- My funk?
- Yeah.
312
00:16:38,304 --> 00:16:40,031
Thought you weren't
in the mood to party.
313
00:16:40,032 --> 00:16:41,134
Chloe!
314
00:16:41,135 --> 00:16:42,750
Michael drugged me.
315
00:16:42,751 --> 00:16:45,150
I don't know what
happened to me that night.
316
00:16:45,151 --> 00:16:47,363
But I know that there
was something in my drink,
317
00:16:47,364 --> 00:16:48,741
I know that for a fact,
318
00:16:48,742 --> 00:16:51,538
and I know that Michael
didn't just tuck me into bed
319
00:16:51,539 --> 00:16:53,417
and watch me sleep.
320
00:16:53,418 --> 00:16:57,174
Shit, I'm sorry if I've been in a funk.
321
00:16:57,175 --> 00:16:59,178
Yeah, well that's all I mean.
322
00:17:03,312 --> 00:17:05,065
You don't believe that
happened to me, do you?
323
00:17:05,066 --> 00:17:06,568
Of course I do.
324
00:17:06,569 --> 00:17:08,238
Yeah, I keep hearing you say that,
325
00:17:08,239 --> 00:17:09,314
but I don't see it.
326
00:17:09,315 --> 00:17:11,327
Well, I just don't know
what to do about it.
327
00:17:11,328 --> 00:17:12,873
All I can think to do is be positive,
328
00:17:12,874 --> 00:17:15,627
which I'm doing, but it
doesn't seem to be helping.
329
00:17:15,628 --> 00:17:18,258
Plus, the Beta guys aren't all bad.
330
00:17:18,259 --> 00:17:20,095
And I've been hanging
out with Yuejin lately,
331
00:17:20,096 --> 00:17:22,516
which... I don't mean
that in a weird way,
332
00:17:22,517 --> 00:17:24,052
like instead of you.
333
00:17:24,053 --> 00:17:25,432
No, that's great, I get it.
334
00:17:25,433 --> 00:17:27,586
Actually, keep doing that, yeah.
335
00:17:27,587 --> 00:17:29,489
You just keep hanging
with your new best friend
336
00:17:29,490 --> 00:17:32,386
and staying positive, okay?
337
00:17:32,387 --> 00:17:34,499
Misty.
338
00:17:34,500 --> 00:17:36,503
Girl!
339
00:17:55,416 --> 00:17:57,670
Is everything okay in there?
340
00:18:37,710 --> 00:18:39,337
Come on, St. Patrickses.
341
00:18:39,338 --> 00:18:41,591
Get those fucking snakes out of Ireland.
342
00:18:41,592 --> 00:18:44,941
Winner gets shots!
343
00:18:44,942 --> 00:18:46,343
No, dude, look.
344
00:18:46,344 --> 00:18:48,705
Everybody knows that the
first moon landing was faked.
345
00:18:48,706 --> 00:18:50,984
It's, like not even a conspiracy.
346
00:18:50,985 --> 00:18:53,156
It's just a cover-up for the real shit.
347
00:18:53,157 --> 00:18:56,329
For example, did you know
that Paul McCartney died
348
00:18:56,330 --> 00:18:57,958
in 1968 from a car wreck
349
00:18:57,959 --> 00:19:00,352
and they replaced him with a lookalike?
350
00:19:00,353 --> 00:19:01,922
Also, Avril Lavigne.
351
00:19:01,923 --> 00:19:05,555
Look it up.
352
00:19:05,556 --> 00:19:06,976
Can I have an Irish coffee, please?
353
00:19:06,977 --> 00:19:09,605
Sure thing.
354
00:19:09,606 --> 00:19:10,984
How's your night going?
355
00:19:11,987 --> 00:19:14,365
I'm not making any sales tonight.
356
00:19:14,366 --> 00:19:16,327
There's a weird spell over the town,
357
00:19:16,328 --> 00:19:17,621
it's very unusual.
358
00:19:17,622 --> 00:19:21,254
- Mm. Illuminati?
- Or aliens.
359
00:19:21,255 --> 00:19:22,355
Ah.
360
00:19:22,356 --> 00:19:25,093
You know, some do say
Saint Patrick was an alien.
361
00:19:25,094 --> 00:19:26,746
That doesn't make sense, though.
362
00:19:26,747 --> 00:19:29,149
Why? Do you not believe?
363
00:19:29,150 --> 00:19:31,482
Okay, the myth is Saint
Patrick drove the snakes
364
00:19:31,483 --> 00:19:32,736
out of Ireland, right?
365
00:19:32,737 --> 00:19:35,490
But since there weren't
actually any snakes in Ireland,
366
00:19:35,491 --> 00:19:38,329
shouldn't your little
conspiracy theory be
367
00:19:38,330 --> 00:19:42,004
"Saint Patrick saved
Ireland from aliens",
368
00:19:42,005 --> 00:19:44,383
not that he was an actual alien?
369
00:19:46,388 --> 00:19:48,349
This is my impressed face.
370
00:19:48,350 --> 00:19:53,026
Drink it in, because you
will not see it very often.
371
00:19:53,027 --> 00:19:55,155
Whatever, okay, I... I don't know.
372
00:19:55,156 --> 00:19:56,867
All I know is that there's something off
373
00:19:56,868 --> 00:19:58,161
with the group dynamics.
374
00:19:58,162 --> 00:19:59,663
When dealing with alien invasions,
375
00:19:59,664 --> 00:20:01,042
you always wanna pay attention
376
00:20:01,043 --> 00:20:02,377
to the subtle things.
377
00:20:02,378 --> 00:20:04,312
Sure, this looks like normal late stage
378
00:20:04,313 --> 00:20:05,550
adolescent fuckery,
379
00:20:05,551 --> 00:20:07,554
but something lurking
just beneath the surface
380
00:20:07,555 --> 00:20:09,391
is askew.
381
00:20:09,392 --> 00:20:11,187
It's a drug dealer thing.
382
00:20:11,188 --> 00:20:12,481
I can feel it.
383
00:20:12,482 --> 00:20:16,531
I'm not in a group, so
it's easy for me to see.
384
00:20:16,532 --> 00:20:19,680
Tell me about it.
385
00:20:19,681 --> 00:20:21,123
So you've noticed it too?
386
00:20:21,124 --> 00:20:22,609
Yeah.
387
00:20:22,610 --> 00:20:24,052
No... I mean no.
388
00:20:24,053 --> 00:20:27,435
I don't know, maybe it's
just the holiday, whatever.
389
00:20:36,196 --> 00:20:38,199
Oh my God.
390
00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:39,911
Actually, you're right.
391
00:20:39,912 --> 00:20:42,082
Something is wrong.
392
00:20:42,083 --> 00:20:44,587
You know, my mom did see the meteor
393
00:20:44,588 --> 00:20:46,215
that landed here on St. Patrick's Day
394
00:20:46,216 --> 00:20:48,344
in 197... okay.
395
00:20:51,978 --> 00:20:54,065
Oh, sorry!
396
00:20:54,066 --> 00:20:55,401
Fuck!
397
00:20:55,402 --> 00:20:57,780
- Yuejin?
- Yeah, it's me.
398
00:20:57,781 --> 00:20:59,575
They're making me wear
this mask because I lost.
399
00:20:59,576 --> 00:21:01,329
I don't even know what
game I was playing.
400
00:21:01,330 --> 00:21:02,916
All right, just one second,
401
00:21:02,917 --> 00:21:04,210
I just wanna talk to Chloe real quick.
402
00:21:04,211 --> 00:21:06,464
Yeah. Will you just tell her
that I'm going to the next spot?
403
00:21:06,465 --> 00:21:07,549
I gotta get out of here,
404
00:21:07,550 --> 00:21:10,347
these fucking games are killing me.
405
00:21:12,251 --> 00:21:14,027
Sorry, sorry.
406
00:21:14,028 --> 00:21:15,805
Hey.
407
00:21:15,806 --> 00:21:17,261
Oh, hi.
408
00:21:17,262 --> 00:21:18,989
Did you see Chloe over
there a minute ago?
409
00:21:18,990 --> 00:21:21,870
Yeah, she just left with some dude.
410
00:21:21,871 --> 00:21:24,500
- Aaron?
- I don't know his name.
411
00:21:24,501 --> 00:21:27,089
College guys only talk to
me if they want to buy drugs.
412
00:21:27,090 --> 00:21:29,555
Guess he's a good boy.
413
00:21:29,556 --> 00:21:30,956
No, that's impossible.
414
00:21:30,957 --> 00:21:33,351
Well, I mean, unless he's
buying from Whiskey Dave,
415
00:21:33,352 --> 00:21:35,563
but his shit's mostly baby laxative,
416
00:21:35,564 --> 00:21:37,567
so it's basically not
doing drugs at all.
417
00:21:37,568 --> 00:21:38,946
No, no, no, I mean it's impossible that
418
00:21:38,947 --> 00:21:41,617
she would leave with that creep.
419
00:21:41,618 --> 00:21:42,996
I don't know what to tell you.
420
00:21:42,997 --> 00:21:45,517
Maybe you don't know your friend
as well as you thought you did.
421
00:21:46,734 --> 00:21:51,349
Oh, shit! Speak of the devil.
422
00:21:51,350 --> 00:21:54,171
Chloe Willis, hey girl.
423
00:21:54,172 --> 00:21:55,572
Your friend's looking for you.
424
00:21:55,573 --> 00:21:57,900
Now that I think
about it, you are kinda cute.
425
00:21:57,901 --> 00:21:58,986
- What is it?
- Oh yeah?
426
00:21:58,987 --> 00:22:00,479
- A little bit.
- I don't know.
427
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:03,871
Butt-dial, maybe?
428
00:22:03,872 --> 00:22:05,290
Chlo?
429
00:22:05,291 --> 00:22:06,877
Well, maybe your friends
just wanted me for themselves.
430
00:22:06,878 --> 00:22:08,671
- I'm pretty sure...
- Chloe?
431
00:22:08,672 --> 00:22:11,928
- Do you always...
- Uh, hey!
432
00:22:11,929 --> 00:22:13,181
Hello?
433
00:22:13,182 --> 00:22:14,768
That's my phone!
434
00:22:16,547 --> 00:22:19,480
Chloe, where are you?
435
00:22:19,481 --> 00:22:21,508
Hey. Have you seen Chloe?
436
00:22:21,509 --> 00:22:24,245
Stop it! We are in...
437
00:22:24,246 --> 00:22:25,839
Chlo, where are you?
438
00:22:25,840 --> 00:22:27,240
Hey, what the hell?
439
00:22:27,241 --> 00:22:29,603
- Come on, whoa!
- It's Misty!
440
00:22:32,174 --> 00:22:33,305
Hey.
441
00:22:33,306 --> 00:22:35,058
Have you guys seen Chloe?
442
00:22:35,059 --> 00:22:36,185
No.
443
00:22:37,560 --> 00:22:39,252
Sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry.
444
00:22:39,253 --> 00:22:41,320
Chloe, fuck! Sorry.
445
00:22:46,331 --> 00:22:47,582
Quit fucking following me
446
00:22:47,583 --> 00:22:48,836
and let go of me.
447
00:22:48,837 --> 00:22:50,566
- Let's go.
- Let go of me.
448
00:22:50,567 --> 00:22:51,800
I said let go of me.
449
00:22:51,801 --> 00:22:53,703
I'm not playing anymore, let go of me.
450
00:22:53,704 --> 00:22:55,146
Chloe, listen to my voice.
451
00:22:55,147 --> 00:22:56,632
I'm right here and
I'm not leaving, okay?
452
00:22:56,633 --> 00:22:58,200
Just tell me where you are!
453
00:22:58,201 --> 00:22:59,899
- Get off of me!
- Stop fighting.
454
00:22:59,900 --> 00:23:01,444
Stop and let go of me!
455
00:23:01,445 --> 00:23:03,699
Help! Let go of me!
456
00:23:03,700 --> 00:23:05,703
Let go of me! Help!
457
00:23:05,704 --> 00:23:06,788
Help!
458
00:23:06,789 --> 00:23:10,044
_
459
00:23:16,183 --> 00:23:17,601
Chloe!
460
00:23:25,718 --> 00:23:28,122
_
461
00:23:28,123 --> 00:23:29,458
Hey! What the fuck?
462
00:23:29,459 --> 00:23:30,753
Gimme back my phone.
463
00:23:30,754 --> 00:23:32,715
Fuck. Fuck, she's gone.
464
00:23:32,716 --> 00:23:35,763
- That fuckhead took her, fuck!
- Okay, okay, slow down.
465
00:23:35,764 --> 00:23:37,390
Fuck, that fuckhead!
466
00:23:37,391 --> 00:23:38,977
Fuck! She was flirting
with him in the bar,
467
00:23:38,978 --> 00:23:40,981
and then... and look.
468
00:23:40,982 --> 00:23:42,944
- What, she's a Gemini?
- She doesn't just
469
00:23:42,945 --> 00:23:44,234
drop her phone! Fuck!
470
00:23:44,235 --> 00:23:46,638
Okay, calm down.
471
00:23:46,639 --> 00:23:48,140
Can I please just have my phone back?
472
00:23:48,141 --> 00:23:50,124
Fuck your phone, are you kidding?
473
00:23:50,125 --> 00:23:52,379
Okay, uh, do you wanna call the cops?
474
00:23:52,380 --> 00:23:54,132
Because if you do, I
can't really be here,
475
00:23:54,133 --> 00:23:56,262
due to all the, you know, drug dealing.
476
00:23:56,263 --> 00:23:58,641
- Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
- Look.
477
00:23:58,642 --> 00:24:00,896
I don't have Prozac
because it's not really
478
00:24:00,897 --> 00:24:03,526
the business model, but here, take this.
479
00:24:03,527 --> 00:24:06,817
- What? No!
- It's Xanax, you need to calm down.
480
00:24:06,818 --> 00:24:08,440
- Oh man.
- All right, look, look,
481
00:24:08,441 --> 00:24:09,663
listen... hey, listen,
482
00:24:09,664 --> 00:24:11,292
I know what a panic attack
looks like, all right?
483
00:24:11,293 --> 00:24:13,797
Just trust me. Take this.
484
00:24:19,935 --> 00:24:21,655
I'd call the cops but I can't.
485
00:24:21,656 --> 00:24:22,773
Why not?
486
00:24:22,774 --> 00:24:24,276
I take it you've never
dealt with the cops
487
00:24:24,277 --> 00:24:26,781
in a situation like this before.
488
00:24:26,782 --> 00:24:28,659
I try not to, but yes,
489
00:24:28,660 --> 00:24:30,627
I have dealt with the
cops a time or two.
490
00:24:30,628 --> 00:24:31,970
That's not what I mean!
491
00:24:31,971 --> 00:24:33,920
Fuck! If I call 9-1-1
and tell them I saw
492
00:24:33,921 --> 00:24:36,300
a drunk frat guy flirting
with my drunk friend at a bar,
493
00:24:36,301 --> 00:24:38,429
they're gonna tell me
that's what college kids do.
494
00:24:38,430 --> 00:24:40,516
If I tell them I actually
didn't see anything
495
00:24:40,517 --> 00:24:42,062
and I have no idea where they went,
496
00:24:42,063 --> 00:24:43,690
they're gonna start
calling me "young lady"
497
00:24:43,691 --> 00:24:45,318
and asking if I've been drinking too
498
00:24:45,319 --> 00:24:47,748
or taking some of the drugs
you just gave me, for example.
499
00:24:47,749 --> 00:24:48,825
True.
500
00:24:48,826 --> 00:24:51,813
It is hard to get people to
believe what they don't see,
501
00:24:51,814 --> 00:24:56,220
and by the time they do,
it's usually too late.
502
00:24:56,221 --> 00:24:57,414
Oh shit.
503
00:24:57,415 --> 00:24:58,774
Oh my God, no!
504
00:24:58,775 --> 00:25:00,431
He probably took her back
to that ratfuck cesspool
505
00:25:00,432 --> 00:25:02,227
- of a frat house.
- Okay.
506
00:25:02,228 --> 00:25:06,174
So do you wanna go and
check if she's there?
507
00:25:06,175 --> 00:25:07,301
Shit.
508
00:25:07,302 --> 00:25:09,807
No, I would, but...
509
00:25:09,808 --> 00:25:11,309
no, no, I can't.
510
00:25:11,310 --> 00:25:14,065
If I...
511
00:25:14,066 --> 00:25:16,069
Fuck. I'm sorry.
512
00:25:16,070 --> 00:25:19,450
It's fine.
513
00:25:19,451 --> 00:25:22,958
I'm guessing you've been there before?
514
00:25:29,346 --> 00:25:31,349
So this is when I should have just said,
515
00:25:31,350 --> 00:25:32,476
"Have a great night!
516
00:25:32,477 --> 00:25:33,855
Good luck finding your horrible friend",
517
00:25:33,856 --> 00:25:35,406
and gone back to my normal life
518
00:25:35,407 --> 00:25:37,111
of not dealing with other people's shit.
519
00:25:37,112 --> 00:25:39,490
But, fuck! Look at this crying mess.
520
00:25:39,491 --> 00:25:41,470
I mean, I'm tough, but
I'm not made of stone.
521
00:25:41,471 --> 00:25:42,914
Plus, business was slow
522
00:25:42,915 --> 00:25:44,900
and the Beta boys are always
willing to pay double,
523
00:25:44,901 --> 00:25:47,841
so what the hell.
524
00:25:47,842 --> 00:25:50,597
Um, mm-kay, fine.
525
00:25:50,598 --> 00:25:52,726
I'm coming with you.
526
00:25:52,727 --> 00:25:54,062
I'm coming with you. Let's go.
527
00:25:56,610 --> 00:25:57,944
Wait.
528
00:26:02,705 --> 00:26:05,250
Oh, good. The Beta
boys are still getting smashed
529
00:26:05,251 --> 00:26:06,629
on the pub crawl.
530
00:26:10,512 --> 00:26:11,513
You coming?
531
00:26:14,395 --> 00:26:18,395
Hey, what happened here?
532
00:26:19,154 --> 00:26:22,034
I don't remember.
533
00:26:22,035 --> 00:26:23,495
It's kinda part of the problem?
534
00:26:23,496 --> 00:26:24,873
You know, you can't file a police report
535
00:26:24,874 --> 00:26:28,004
if you don't know what
you're filing it about.
536
00:26:28,005 --> 00:26:31,136
I just... I woke up here once, and...
537
00:26:35,478 --> 00:26:39,903
... all I know is nothing good
happens in that house, so.
538
00:26:39,904 --> 00:26:43,160
Yeah. I've heard the stories.
539
00:26:43,161 --> 00:26:45,749
- No one listened.
- Okay.
540
00:26:45,750 --> 00:26:50,257
Well... I believe you.
541
00:26:50,258 --> 00:26:54,258
And I'm not scared of
shit in this world, so...
542
00:26:55,895 --> 00:26:57,438
Come on.
543
00:26:57,439 --> 00:26:59,275
Let's go get your friend.
544
00:27:02,658 --> 00:27:05,705
Uh, yeah, hi. Believe women, it's 2020.
545
00:27:05,706 --> 00:27:07,667
And besides, no one ever listens to me
546
00:27:07,668 --> 00:27:08,920
when I say shit,
547
00:27:08,921 --> 00:27:11,174
so I know how fucking infuriating it is.
548
00:27:26,455 --> 00:27:27,833
Okay, where are the bedrooms?
549
00:27:27,834 --> 00:27:30,087
Through there.
550
00:27:33,929 --> 00:27:35,723
What is that?
551
00:27:38,437 --> 00:27:39,606
Shauna.
552
00:27:42,572 --> 00:27:44,198
Shauna!
553
00:28:00,356 --> 00:28:03,486
Can I help you girls?
554
00:28:03,487 --> 00:28:04,698
Michael.
555
00:28:04,699 --> 00:28:06,492
The biggest asshole of them all.
556
00:28:06,493 --> 00:28:09,121
Apparently, his dad's
some bigshot lawyer
557
00:28:09,122 --> 00:28:11,127
so he thinks he can
get away with anything.
558
00:28:11,128 --> 00:28:14,760
Can you believe he specifically
asked for roofies once?
559
00:28:14,761 --> 00:28:16,220
Fucking moron.
560
00:28:16,221 --> 00:28:17,700
I sold him a bottle of Tic Tacs
561
00:28:17,701 --> 00:28:20,395
and I said they were
horse tranquilizers.
562
00:28:20,396 --> 00:28:22,524
Well, well, well.
563
00:28:22,525 --> 00:28:24,487
Misty Carpenter.
564
00:28:24,488 --> 00:28:26,157
It's great to see you again.
565
00:28:26,158 --> 00:28:28,135
I been meaning to have
a civilized conversation
566
00:28:28,136 --> 00:28:30,123
with you about some of the
things that you said about me.
567
00:28:30,124 --> 00:28:32,044
No, dude, we're looking for Aaron.
568
00:28:32,045 --> 00:28:33,714
Very important matters.
569
00:28:33,715 --> 00:28:35,008
Well, he's busy.
570
00:28:35,009 --> 00:28:36,260
Where is he?
571
00:28:36,261 --> 00:28:37,889
He's upstairs.
572
00:28:37,890 --> 00:28:39,517
Uh, afraid I can't let you do that.
573
00:28:39,518 --> 00:28:41,145
Why not?
574
00:28:41,146 --> 00:28:45,655
- Like I said, he's busy.
- All right, dude, look.
575
00:28:45,656 --> 00:28:47,157
You like Molly?
576
00:28:47,158 --> 00:28:49,663
Here you go.
577
00:28:49,664 --> 00:28:50,873
- You're good.
- Great.
578
00:28:50,874 --> 00:28:53,169
Not her.
579
00:28:53,170 --> 00:28:57,554
I need to clear up a few things
before we welcome you back here.
580
00:29:04,526 --> 00:29:06,070
How about now?
581
00:29:11,081 --> 00:29:12,291
Fine.
582
00:29:15,758 --> 00:29:17,009
Misty!
583
00:29:19,766 --> 00:29:22,771
You ever wanna grab a coffee and chat,
584
00:29:22,772 --> 00:29:24,398
just let me know.
585
00:29:41,601 --> 00:29:45,733
God, we should burn this place
to the fucking ground.
586
00:29:47,863 --> 00:29:49,616
Aaron, open the door.
587
00:29:53,959 --> 00:29:56,588
What is it, what do you hear?
588
00:29:56,589 --> 00:29:59,218
We need to open this door.
589
00:29:59,219 --> 00:30:03,101
Wait... move, move, move.
590
00:30:03,102 --> 00:30:05,480
Fuck.
591
00:30:05,481 --> 00:30:07,819
You just carry that with you?
592
00:30:07,820 --> 00:30:09,113
Mama taught me a thing or two
593
00:30:09,114 --> 00:30:10,365
over the years.
594
00:30:10,366 --> 00:30:12,267
And one of them was that Boy Scouts
595
00:30:12,268 --> 00:30:16,502
aren't the only ones who
should always be prepared.
596
00:30:16,503 --> 00:30:18,883
This isn't the first
lock I've had to pick.
597
00:30:35,166 --> 00:30:37,629
Jesus Fuck, you gotta untie me.
598
00:30:40,218 --> 00:30:41,260
Where's Chloe?
599
00:30:41,261 --> 00:30:42,850
We need to get out of
here right now, okay?
600
00:30:42,851 --> 00:30:44,753
Not until you tell
me what you did with her.
601
00:30:44,754 --> 00:30:46,946
Did with... what the
fuck are you talking about?
602
00:30:46,947 --> 00:30:48,389
Aaron, I saw you with her.
603
00:30:48,390 --> 00:30:49,653
- Who?
- Chloe!
604
00:30:49,654 --> 00:30:52,407
- Idiot.
- I don't know where Chloe is!
605
00:30:52,408 --> 00:30:53,661
You guys saw us leave the pub
606
00:30:53,662 --> 00:30:55,288
after she poured her
fucking drink on the ground.
607
00:30:55,289 --> 00:30:57,292
Right, and then you came ba...
608
00:30:57,293 --> 00:30:59,046
I saw you talking to her!
609
00:30:59,047 --> 00:31:01,425
I have no idea what
you're talking about.
610
00:31:01,426 --> 00:31:03,548
I've been tied to this bed
for the past couple hours.
611
00:31:03,549 --> 00:31:05,156
Look at my leg. Look at my leg!
612
00:31:05,157 --> 00:31:07,018
I'm lucky to be alive.
613
00:31:07,019 --> 00:31:08,462
Fucking get me out!
614
00:31:08,463 --> 00:31:10,965
All right, I am sick of this shit, okay?
615
00:31:10,966 --> 00:31:12,155
I saw what I saw.
616
00:31:12,156 --> 00:31:14,282
I know the cops
probably won't believe me
617
00:31:14,283 --> 00:31:16,581
but I don't know what else to do.
618
00:31:16,582 --> 00:31:18,585
Oh no... wait, wait... hey, wait.
619
00:31:18,586 --> 00:31:19,921
Wait! Wait!
620
00:31:19,922 --> 00:31:21,327
Hey, you, you!
621
00:31:21,328 --> 00:31:23,731
Okay, hi. We left, all right?
622
00:31:23,732 --> 00:31:24,806
You saw us leave the pub.
623
00:31:24,807 --> 00:31:26,026
Okay, you can ask anyone downstairs.
624
00:31:26,027 --> 00:31:28,939
We came back here right after.
I wasn't with Chloe.
625
00:31:28,940 --> 00:31:32,780
It is strange how
you got here so quickly.
626
00:31:32,781 --> 00:31:34,325
- Yes, yes!
- Hi.
627
00:31:34,326 --> 00:31:36,412
I need to report a kidnapping.
628
00:31:36,413 --> 00:31:37,915
- Fuck!
- Yeah.
629
00:31:37,916 --> 00:31:39,711
At the Beta Sigma Eta house on campus.
630
00:31:39,712 --> 00:31:41,548
When's the last time that you saw me?
631
00:31:41,549 --> 00:31:43,719
I don't know, like,
what, 15 minutes ago?
632
00:31:43,720 --> 00:31:44,795
And in that time,
633
00:31:44,796 --> 00:31:46,432
I got back here, I tied
myself to this bed and
634
00:31:46,433 --> 00:31:47,634
bit out a chunk of my own leg?
635
00:31:47,635 --> 00:31:49,063
- They're on their way.
- Great.
636
00:31:49,064 --> 00:31:50,440
I need to report that I was attacked
637
00:31:50,441 --> 00:31:52,436
- by some crazy fucking bitch!
- You know what?
638
00:31:52,437 --> 00:31:54,296
Just start from the beginning, okay?
639
00:31:54,297 --> 00:31:55,490
How did this happen?
640
00:31:57,142 --> 00:31:58,376
Wait.
641
00:31:58,377 --> 00:32:00,052
You said that you saw
somebody at the pub
642
00:32:00,053 --> 00:32:01,491
15 minutes ago that looked like me?
643
00:32:01,492 --> 00:32:03,364
Not someone who looked
like you, asshole,
644
00:32:03,365 --> 00:32:05,679
it was you.
645
00:32:05,680 --> 00:32:07,224
Okay.
646
00:32:07,225 --> 00:32:10,105
Okay, this is gonna sound crazy.
647
00:32:10,106 --> 00:32:11,942
I brought a girl home from the pub...
648
00:32:11,943 --> 00:32:14,363
not fucking Chloe...
649
00:32:14,364 --> 00:32:17,244
and she was apparently
650
00:32:17,245 --> 00:32:21,628
into some really kinky shit.
651
00:32:21,629 --> 00:32:23,715
Things got really rough.
652
00:32:23,716 --> 00:32:25,260
You know?
653
00:32:25,261 --> 00:32:27,890
Little playful nibble here and there,
654
00:32:27,891 --> 00:32:30,019
and then she just bit into my leg.
655
00:32:31,481 --> 00:32:34,486
I looked down and there's a
fucking chunk of my leg gone.
656
00:32:38,245 --> 00:32:41,668
And there was something
weird in her eyes.
657
00:32:41,669 --> 00:32:44,256
What do you mean?
658
00:32:44,257 --> 00:32:47,722
It was like a... it
was like a green cloud.
659
00:32:50,645 --> 00:32:53,483
And it freaked me out,
so I kicked her off me.
660
00:32:55,279 --> 00:32:56,656
Right.
661
00:32:56,657 --> 00:32:59,495
So where is she now?
662
00:32:59,496 --> 00:33:01,165
Well, this is the crazy part.
663
00:33:03,378 --> 00:33:08,513
She was on the ground and
made this insane fucking sound.
664
00:33:08,514 --> 00:33:11,811
Like bones breaking.
665
00:33:11,812 --> 00:33:15,819
And then she got up, and I swear to God,
666
00:33:15,820 --> 00:33:17,823
she suddenly looked like...
667
00:33:19,703 --> 00:33:21,205
You?
668
00:33:21,206 --> 00:33:23,167
Yeah. Like me.
669
00:33:24,922 --> 00:33:27,374
I fucking knew it, I
fucking... I told you,
670
00:33:27,375 --> 00:33:29,338
I told you there was
something in the air tonight.
671
00:33:29,339 --> 00:33:30,339
Are you serious right now?
672
00:33:30,340 --> 00:33:31,810
- You don't actually be...
- Okay.
673
00:33:31,811 --> 00:33:34,022
This... thing, where did it go?
674
00:33:34,023 --> 00:33:36,026
My boys had started
knocking on the door,
675
00:33:36,027 --> 00:33:38,072
probably from all the commotion.
676
00:33:38,073 --> 00:33:41,203
It got scared and it
went out the window.
677
00:33:41,204 --> 00:33:44,209
This is when shit gets real.
678
00:34:10,054 --> 00:34:11,890
What did I tell you?
679
00:34:11,891 --> 00:34:14,061
What did I tell you!
680
00:34:14,062 --> 00:34:17,943
Not zombies, no... fucking aliens.
681
00:34:17,944 --> 00:34:21,200
Right? I mean, we've been
saying this the whole time.
682
00:34:21,201 --> 00:34:22,776
And it wasn't really the right time
683
00:34:22,777 --> 00:34:23,794
to revel in it, you know,
684
00:34:23,795 --> 00:34:26,586
but man, did it feel good to be right.
685
00:34:26,587 --> 00:34:28,849
And I know Misty was still all concerned
686
00:34:28,850 --> 00:34:32,171
about finding Chloe, but
alien invasion happening,
687
00:34:32,172 --> 00:34:35,854
and we were right in the middle of it!
688
00:34:35,855 --> 00:34:37,733
And that's when I realized,
689
00:34:37,734 --> 00:34:41,741
oh fuck, we were right
in the middle of it.
690
00:34:41,742 --> 00:34:44,114
Tonight just took a hard freakin' turn
691
00:34:44,115 --> 00:34:46,794
from rescue mission
to fight for survival.
692
00:34:46,795 --> 00:34:49,032
Now, trust, I've been
training for survival
693
00:34:49,033 --> 00:34:50,091
my whole life.
694
00:34:50,092 --> 00:34:52,220
But even if I could save myself,
695
00:34:52,221 --> 00:34:54,057
could I save two princesses,
696
00:34:54,058 --> 00:34:55,226
a frat guy,
697
00:34:55,227 --> 00:34:57,732
and a still missing,
possibly dead party girl?
698
00:34:57,733 --> 00:35:02,073
Well, that was a different
fucking story altogether.
699
00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:09,667
Because Jessica, she's got
the bottom but not the top,
700
00:35:09,668 --> 00:35:11,467
you know?
701
00:35:11,468 --> 00:35:15,668
Little bit of this, little bit of that.
702
00:35:16,528 --> 00:35:19,024
- Oh shit.
- Yeah.
703
00:35:19,025 --> 00:35:22,155
It's okay, fellas, relax.
704
00:35:22,156 --> 00:35:25,495
St. Patrick's Day, I'm
not here to ruin the party.
705
00:35:25,496 --> 00:35:27,290
Is there something we can
help you with, Officer?
706
00:35:27,291 --> 00:35:29,419
Why are you guys still
hanging around here?
707
00:35:29,420 --> 00:35:31,381
You guys should be out partying!
708
00:35:31,382 --> 00:35:33,010
Don't you like to party?
709
00:35:35,349 --> 00:35:37,978
- We like to party.
- That's good.
710
00:35:37,979 --> 00:35:39,397
Gotta follow tradition.
711
00:35:39,398 --> 00:35:41,026
Get wasted.
712
00:35:41,027 --> 00:35:42,613
Trash the town!
713
00:35:42,614 --> 00:35:44,032
Yeah, we're just...
714
00:35:44,033 --> 00:35:47,163
we're just waiting for Aaron.
715
00:35:47,164 --> 00:35:49,167
You guys should head out now.
716
00:35:49,168 --> 00:35:51,548
He'll catch up with you.
717
00:35:51,549 --> 00:35:52,883
It's cool.
718
00:35:52,884 --> 00:35:55,806
- We'll just wait for Aaron.
- No, you should go now.
719
00:36:03,280 --> 00:36:05,449
- Come on.
- Yeah.
720
00:36:05,450 --> 00:36:07,036
Yeah, all right.
721
00:36:07,037 --> 00:36:09,040
We will, uh... we'll go now.
722
00:36:09,041 --> 00:36:10,544
There we go.
723
00:36:10,545 --> 00:36:11,546
St. Patrick's Day.
724
00:36:11,547 --> 00:36:13,675
I'm your cool aunt tonight, let's go.
725
00:36:13,676 --> 00:36:15,177
You left your drugs.
726
00:36:15,178 --> 00:36:17,766
Just... don't look.
727
00:36:17,767 --> 00:36:20,062
All right.
728
00:36:25,909 --> 00:36:27,285
Please just untie me.
729
00:36:27,286 --> 00:36:29,916
I'm kinda bleeding out here
and I really need to pee.
730
00:36:29,917 --> 00:36:31,335
Yes, finally.
731
00:36:31,336 --> 00:36:32,838
Hi, hey.
732
00:36:32,839 --> 00:36:34,967
Anyone care to explain to
me what's going on here?
733
00:36:34,968 --> 00:36:36,554
He kidnapped our friend.
734
00:36:36,555 --> 00:36:38,474
Kinda looks like the other way around.
735
00:36:38,475 --> 00:36:39,977
- No...
- Who's your friend?
736
00:36:39,978 --> 00:36:41,880
- Chloe Willis.
- And where is she?
737
00:36:41,881 --> 00:36:44,561
- Ask him!
- I'm the one that got attacked, sir.
738
00:36:44,562 --> 00:36:46,464
Look at me.
739
00:36:46,465 --> 00:36:48,559
- Who did that?
- He claims that he did.
740
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:50,999
- That's not what I said.
- Okay, um, officer?
741
00:36:52,587 --> 00:36:53,913
I believe that we are in the midst
742
00:36:53,914 --> 00:36:55,737
of an alien invasion
in which imposters are
743
00:36:55,738 --> 00:36:57,972
rapidly replacing the
citizens of this town.
744
00:37:01,981 --> 00:37:04,234
That's interesting.
745
00:37:04,235 --> 00:37:06,739
It sounds a little far-fetched.
746
00:37:06,740 --> 00:37:07,992
Sure you guys aren't just drunk
747
00:37:07,993 --> 00:37:09,494
like everyone else in this town?
748
00:37:09,495 --> 00:37:13,712
Something lurking
just beneath the surface.
749
00:37:13,713 --> 00:37:15,089
Fucking askew.
750
00:37:15,090 --> 00:37:17,218
- No. No, no, no, no!
- Okay. Can you please just
751
00:37:17,219 --> 00:37:18,888
untie me, sir?
752
00:37:18,889 --> 00:37:20,016
No!
753
00:37:20,017 --> 00:37:21,978
Um, excuse me, sorry,
what are you doing?
754
00:37:21,979 --> 00:37:23,480
- I'm gonna untie him.
- Thank you.
755
00:37:23,481 --> 00:37:25,526
Aren't you gonna like investigate
756
00:37:25,527 --> 00:37:27,155
or something?
757
00:37:27,156 --> 00:37:29,008
I'm taking him to the station.
758
00:37:29,009 --> 00:37:30,117
What?
759
00:37:30,118 --> 00:37:31,661
Why am I being arrested, for what?
760
00:37:31,662 --> 00:37:32,916
Just standard procedure.
761
00:37:32,917 --> 00:37:35,129
How is it standard procedure?
I didn't do anything.
762
00:37:35,130 --> 00:37:36,381
Excuse me, officer, sir.
763
00:37:36,382 --> 00:37:39,093
Um, Aaron actually
isn't our main concern.
764
00:37:39,094 --> 00:37:41,475
We just wanna find my
friend Chloe Willis.
765
00:37:41,476 --> 00:37:42,895
We'll be on the lookout for her.
766
00:37:42,896 --> 00:37:45,233
It's a small town, I'm
sure she'll turn up.
767
00:37:45,234 --> 00:37:46,301
No, no, no, you don't understand.
768
00:37:46,302 --> 00:37:47,842
Chloe... Chloe literally doesn't...
769
00:37:47,843 --> 00:37:48,907
Hey, hey, hey.
770
00:37:55,295 --> 00:37:58,300
Dude, can you at least
let me put my clothes on?
771
00:37:58,301 --> 00:38:01,289
Okay, look, so what I
was trying to tell you earlier
772
00:38:01,290 --> 00:38:03,435
about the meteor that
landed here in 1978?
773
00:38:03,436 --> 00:38:05,739
- It was on St. Patrick's Day.
- Shut up!
774
00:38:05,740 --> 00:38:07,641
I don't wanna hear about
some fucking conspiracy theory
775
00:38:07,642 --> 00:38:08,947
right now, I'm talking about Chloe!
776
00:38:08,948 --> 00:38:10,032
I know that!
777
00:38:10,033 --> 00:38:11,304
I am too.
778
00:38:11,305 --> 00:38:15,336
I'm talking about her and
Aaron and this entire town.
779
00:38:15,337 --> 00:38:17,296
Aren't you supposed to do
the whole Miranda thing?
780
00:38:17,297 --> 00:38:19,050
Am I under arrest?
781
00:38:19,051 --> 00:38:20,302
Hey.
782
00:38:23,309 --> 00:38:25,153
Can you please just
give me a first aid kit
783
00:38:25,154 --> 00:38:26,566
- for my wound?
- Get in.
784
00:38:30,448 --> 00:38:31,951
Fuck!
785
00:38:53,746 --> 00:38:55,206
Is that...
786
00:38:59,626 --> 00:39:01,027
Chloe, are you okay?
787
00:39:01,028 --> 00:39:02,228
Yuejin, it's Misty.
788
00:39:02,229 --> 00:39:03,598
Where's Chloe?
789
00:39:03,599 --> 00:39:04,975
We're trying to figure
that out right now,
790
00:39:04,976 --> 00:39:06,228
I was hoping you knew.
791
00:39:06,229 --> 00:39:07,480
People are losing their minds.
792
00:39:07,481 --> 00:39:10,310
I think I've seen like 12 fights
break out in the last hour.
793
00:39:10,311 --> 00:39:11,989
I just saw someone biting a person like
794
00:39:11,990 --> 00:39:13,549
a fucking zombie movie.
795
00:39:13,550 --> 00:39:17,275
No, not zombies;
they're alien imposters.
796
00:39:17,276 --> 00:39:18,336
What?
797
00:39:18,337 --> 00:39:20,130
Who is that?
798
00:39:20,131 --> 00:39:21,717
It's Shauna from the pub.
799
00:39:21,718 --> 00:39:22,886
Where are you right now?
800
00:39:22,887 --> 00:39:24,496
I'm leaving the pub crawl.
801
00:39:24,497 --> 00:39:27,108
Seriously, it's like
everyone is tripping balls
802
00:39:27,109 --> 00:39:28,230
on bath salts.
803
00:39:28,231 --> 00:39:29,608
Okay. We're at the Beta house.
804
00:39:29,609 --> 00:39:30,860
Just come meet us here.
805
00:39:30,861 --> 00:39:33,031
Okay.
806
00:39:33,032 --> 00:39:34,618
Fuck.
807
00:39:43,887 --> 00:39:45,890
Oh, fuck no.
808
00:39:52,529 --> 00:39:54,407
Wait!
809
00:40:02,550 --> 00:40:05,555
Told you he's a psycho!
810
00:40:05,556 --> 00:40:07,934
He's one of them, he attacked me.
811
00:40:07,935 --> 00:40:10,690
Look... come look.
812
00:40:13,404 --> 00:40:16,952
Holy shit.
813
00:40:16,953 --> 00:40:18,288
Fuck me.
814
00:40:21,170 --> 00:40:23,382
Yup, as I suspected.
815
00:40:23,383 --> 00:40:25,052
Imposters don't bleed red.
816
00:40:25,053 --> 00:40:27,607
Most people would be
grossed out by alien blood,
817
00:40:27,608 --> 00:40:31,272
but this is what I call
bona fide proof, y'all!
818
00:40:31,273 --> 00:40:33,443
Can somebody please just uncuff me?
819
00:40:33,444 --> 00:40:35,657
Yeah, sorry.
820
00:40:41,795 --> 00:40:43,487
Oh, fuck.
821
00:40:43,488 --> 00:40:46,533
All right, I don't know what
the fuck is going on tonight,
822
00:40:46,534 --> 00:40:48,223
but that's the second one
that tried to attack me.
823
00:40:48,224 --> 00:40:50,854
Yup, you are lucky to be alive.
824
00:40:50,855 --> 00:40:53,568
This alien imposter was out to kill you.
825
00:40:53,569 --> 00:40:55,822
I'm thinking it's because the
one who attacked you earlier
826
00:40:55,823 --> 00:40:57,116
got your DNA and became you.
827
00:40:57,117 --> 00:40:58,703
You know, that's how they operate.
828
00:40:58,704 --> 00:41:00,456
That's impossible.
829
00:41:00,457 --> 00:41:02,501
Not for aliens.
830
00:41:02,502 --> 00:41:04,715
So that's who was at the
pub with Chloe, my imposter.
831
00:41:04,716 --> 00:41:06,468
That means they got Chloe.
832
00:41:06,469 --> 00:41:08,556
Not necessarily.
833
00:41:08,557 --> 00:41:10,309
I mean, you know, he escaped,
834
00:41:10,310 --> 00:41:12,480
so it's possible she did too.
835
00:41:12,481 --> 00:41:14,735
- Hey, Misty!
- Yuejin! Over here!
836
00:41:14,736 --> 00:41:17,490
What's happening, why are the cops...
837
00:41:17,491 --> 00:41:20,830
Oh, what the fuck?
838
00:41:20,831 --> 00:41:22,584
- Yup.
- What is that?
839
00:41:22,585 --> 00:41:25,965
And why is he covered in green goo?
840
00:41:25,966 --> 00:41:27,607
Hello, what the hell's going on?
841
00:41:27,608 --> 00:41:28,846
What does it look like?
842
00:41:28,847 --> 00:41:30,767
Alien invasion, Yuejin.
843
00:41:30,768 --> 00:41:32,646
They're finally coming out from hiding.
844
00:41:32,647 --> 00:41:34,900
Is she still for real with this?
845
00:41:36,278 --> 00:41:37,739
Hey, wait, where are you going?
846
00:41:37,740 --> 00:41:39,993
I need a fucking Band-Aid.
847
00:41:54,523 --> 00:41:56,860
Okay, easy, easy.
848
00:41:58,657 --> 00:42:00,868
What do you think they want?
849
00:42:00,869 --> 00:42:02,288
Great question, but...
850
00:42:02,289 --> 00:42:04,668
I'm not really concerned
about that right now.
851
00:42:04,669 --> 00:42:07,172
It's happening whether
we want it to or not.
852
00:42:07,173 --> 00:42:08,676
Okay.
853
00:42:10,263 --> 00:42:12,057
Sorry, I just...
854
00:42:12,058 --> 00:42:14,771
This is all completely crazy.
855
00:42:14,772 --> 00:42:17,318
Like, I feel like I'm in
someone else's acid trip.
856
00:42:17,319 --> 00:42:18,403
Your acid trip.
857
00:42:18,404 --> 00:42:19,698
Hey, don't kill the messenger.
858
00:42:19,699 --> 00:42:22,161
No, it's gotta be something else.
859
00:42:22,162 --> 00:42:24,507
Aliens is just absurd.
860
00:42:24,508 --> 00:42:26,218
Okay, well, you can go take a look
861
00:42:26,219 --> 00:42:28,799
at the alien cop outside
if you want more proof.
862
00:42:28,800 --> 00:42:30,052
Oh, fuck.
863
00:42:30,053 --> 00:42:31,387
We left him outside.
864
00:42:31,388 --> 00:42:32,557
Somebody's gonna notice that.
865
00:42:32,558 --> 00:42:34,770
I think I know where we need to go.
866
00:42:34,771 --> 00:42:36,899
I think we may be able
to get some answers.
867
00:42:36,900 --> 00:42:37,942
To what?
868
00:42:37,943 --> 00:42:39,905
An alien invasion?
869
00:42:39,906 --> 00:42:41,909
And weapons.
870
00:42:41,910 --> 00:42:42,952
Weapons?
871
00:42:42,953 --> 00:42:44,706
You can never be too prepared.
872
00:42:44,707 --> 00:42:46,919
Okay...
873
00:42:48,297 --> 00:42:49,675
Hey.
874
00:42:49,676 --> 00:42:51,469
What do you think, Misty?
875
00:42:55,061 --> 00:42:57,231
I just... I told her
876
00:42:57,232 --> 00:43:00,195
to stay away from them, and I...
877
00:43:00,196 --> 00:43:02,867
I just don't get why
she didn't believe me.
878
00:43:02,868 --> 00:43:04,705
Stay away from who, the imposters?
879
00:43:04,706 --> 00:43:06,750
No.
880
00:43:06,751 --> 00:43:08,128
Aaron.
881
00:43:08,129 --> 00:43:10,298
All the guys at the pub.
882
00:43:10,299 --> 00:43:12,344
You told her to stay away from me?
883
00:43:12,345 --> 00:43:13,430
Yeah.
884
00:43:13,431 --> 00:43:17,731
You, Michael, all of you guys.
885
00:43:17,732 --> 00:43:18,983
Wow.
886
00:43:18,984 --> 00:43:22,114
So you're just...
lumping us all together?
887
00:43:22,115 --> 00:43:26,122
Well, you're, like, a
frickin' pervert mafia.
888
00:43:26,123 --> 00:43:27,499
Hey.
889
00:43:27,500 --> 00:43:29,253
I'm not Michael.
890
00:43:30,841 --> 00:43:33,971
So then why didn't you
do anything about it?
891
00:43:36,226 --> 00:43:37,269
Right.
892
00:43:37,270 --> 00:43:38,773
Wait, Misty.
893
00:43:57,895 --> 00:44:00,148
Chloe?
894
00:44:00,149 --> 00:44:02,528
Misty, you ready to go?
895
00:44:05,619 --> 00:44:07,162
Chloe?
896
00:44:32,756 --> 00:44:33,799
Shit!
897
00:44:35,011 --> 00:44:36,178
They're here!
898
00:44:37,515 --> 00:44:38,934
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait!
899
00:44:43,278 --> 00:44:44,571
Hey, wait, wait!
900
00:44:44,572 --> 00:44:45,948
Where's Aaron?
901
00:44:45,949 --> 00:44:47,827
Help! Help!
902
00:44:47,828 --> 00:44:49,789
Somebody fucking help me!
903
00:44:49,790 --> 00:44:51,542
Help! Help!
904
00:44:58,725 --> 00:45:01,980
Like I said, always be prepared.
905
00:45:04,069 --> 00:45:05,988
I think I love you.
906
00:45:05,989 --> 00:45:07,491
Gross.
907
00:45:07,492 --> 00:45:09,746
You just have a gun on you?
908
00:45:09,747 --> 00:45:12,125
Got it off the dead alien.
909
00:45:12,126 --> 00:45:13,378
I'm driving.
910
00:45:24,860 --> 00:45:26,989
Oh, shit, get down. Get down.
911
00:45:36,759 --> 00:45:38,469
Should we just go?
912
00:45:41,853 --> 00:45:44,649
No, no, just stay low.
913
00:45:47,781 --> 00:45:49,408
They don't know we're here.
914
00:45:50,662 --> 00:45:53,291
So is everybody just an alien now?
915
00:45:53,292 --> 00:45:54,627
I mean, I don't know,
916
00:45:54,628 --> 00:45:57,382
but these guys are
definitely not normal humans.
917
00:45:57,383 --> 00:45:59,888
How do you know that?
918
00:46:01,726 --> 00:46:03,604
They're loading the officer's body
919
00:46:03,605 --> 00:46:04,898
into the truck.
920
00:46:07,528 --> 00:46:10,492
How'd they know the body was here?
921
00:46:10,493 --> 00:46:12,663
They are a hive mind.
922
00:46:13,666 --> 00:46:15,795
Okay.
923
00:46:15,796 --> 00:46:17,297
I think we're good.
924
00:46:45,020 --> 00:46:48,819
God, we really are in the
middle of nowhere, aren't we?
925
00:46:48,820 --> 00:46:51,950
Can't believe people
actually live out here.
926
00:46:51,951 --> 00:46:55,456
It's a real shithole.
927
00:46:55,457 --> 00:46:57,043
Yup.
928
00:47:05,687 --> 00:47:06,980
Hey.
929
00:47:06,981 --> 00:47:10,738
Can I ask you a personal question?
930
00:47:10,739 --> 00:47:11,990
Okay.
931
00:47:11,991 --> 00:47:13,995
Are you really Irish?
932
00:47:15,624 --> 00:47:17,083
What?
933
00:47:17,084 --> 00:47:18,377
Your shirt, it says,
934
00:47:18,378 --> 00:47:21,091
"Kiss me, I'm Irish".
935
00:47:21,092 --> 00:47:22,470
Oh my God.
936
00:47:29,192 --> 00:47:30,443
Hey.
937
00:47:30,444 --> 00:47:32,304
- Dear God, what?
- Do you still think
938
00:47:32,305 --> 00:47:34,326
I'm the kind of guy who
would've kidnapped your friend?
939
00:47:34,327 --> 00:47:37,833
One hundred percent.
940
00:47:37,834 --> 00:47:41,383
I'm not like the rest of
the guys in my house.
941
00:47:42,719 --> 00:47:45,014
Aren't you, like, a
registered sex offender?
942
00:47:45,015 --> 00:47:46,267
No.
943
00:47:46,268 --> 00:47:47,728
No, no, that's a...
944
00:47:47,729 --> 00:47:50,712
that's a stupid rumor that started
945
00:47:50,713 --> 00:47:53,406
after I was arrested
for peeing in public.
946
00:47:53,407 --> 00:47:56,245
- What?
- Yeah.
947
00:47:56,246 --> 00:47:58,416
Indecent exposure
948
00:47:58,417 --> 00:47:59,752
is what they call it.
949
00:47:59,753 --> 00:48:00,796
After everything with Michael,
950
00:48:00,797 --> 00:48:03,467
I guess it was just
an easy rumor to start.
951
00:48:05,640 --> 00:48:06,766
Cool.
952
00:48:06,767 --> 00:48:09,271
I guess congratulations
for not being a rapist.
953
00:48:09,272 --> 00:48:12,235
It was actually a really
good learning experience.
954
00:48:12,236 --> 00:48:13,780
I did community service,
955
00:48:13,781 --> 00:48:16,285
I started coaching and volunteering,
956
00:48:16,286 --> 00:48:18,999
and I even changed my major
from marketing to education.
957
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:20,544
What is happening right now?
958
00:48:20,545 --> 00:48:22,005
What is this, some kind of
959
00:48:22,006 --> 00:48:24,301
12-Step-for-Misogynists thing?
960
00:48:24,302 --> 00:48:25,679
You get a chip for each woman
961
00:48:25,680 --> 00:48:27,767
you manage to convince
you're not a monster?
962
00:48:27,768 --> 00:48:29,771
Misty, I'm not a bad guy.
963
00:48:29,772 --> 00:48:31,816
No, of course not.
964
00:48:31,817 --> 00:48:33,945
You just hang out with bad guys
965
00:48:33,946 --> 00:48:36,450
and party with bad guys
966
00:48:36,451 --> 00:48:38,454
and live with bad guys,
967
00:48:38,455 --> 00:48:42,337
but, no, I'm sure you're not a bad guy.
968
00:48:47,431 --> 00:48:50,061
You know what, you're right.
969
00:48:50,062 --> 00:48:51,815
I fucked up, okay?
970
00:48:51,816 --> 00:48:56,198
I should've done
something, and I didn't.
971
00:48:56,199 --> 00:48:58,452
I need to learn from my mistakes,
972
00:48:58,453 --> 00:49:00,456
and I need to be better.
973
00:49:00,457 --> 00:49:02,670
So I hope you can forgive me.
974
00:49:12,607 --> 00:49:14,694
Thank you for saying that.
975
00:49:16,991 --> 00:49:19,704
And I know that you're not Michael.
976
00:49:24,213 --> 00:49:26,091
We're gonna find her.
977
00:49:28,096 --> 00:49:29,724
Okay.
978
00:49:50,390 --> 00:49:52,393
We needed a safe spot to lay low,
979
00:49:52,394 --> 00:49:53,855
regroup, and strategize,
980
00:49:53,856 --> 00:49:56,360
and even though it may not look like it,
981
00:49:56,361 --> 00:50:00,535
trust me, this is the safest
place in town right now.
982
00:50:19,658 --> 00:50:20,867
Mom.
983
00:50:20,868 --> 00:50:23,873
Could you get the gun
out of our faces please?
984
00:50:23,874 --> 00:50:25,126
Meet my mom.
985
00:50:25,127 --> 00:50:26,546
She never taught me how to cross-stitch,
986
00:50:26,547 --> 00:50:29,552
but I can assemble a
Beretta M9 in 10 seconds,
987
00:50:29,553 --> 00:50:31,054
blindfolded.
988
00:50:31,055 --> 00:50:34,185
Holy shit, that's your mom?
989
00:50:34,186 --> 00:50:36,816
What did you bring into my house?
990
00:50:38,696 --> 00:50:40,949
They're, um,
991
00:50:40,950 --> 00:50:43,663
friends of mine, I guess.
992
00:50:43,664 --> 00:50:45,207
You can trust them.
993
00:50:45,208 --> 00:50:47,588
We came here because...
994
00:50:47,589 --> 00:50:49,507
we need your help.
995
00:50:49,508 --> 00:50:51,763
You were right, Mama.
996
00:50:51,764 --> 00:50:54,517
About all of it.
997
00:50:54,518 --> 00:50:56,313
They're here.
998
00:51:04,581 --> 00:51:06,793
Well...
999
00:51:06,794 --> 00:51:08,462
we're all fucked.
1000
00:51:08,463 --> 00:51:11,176
I mean, the fact that
you even got this picture
1001
00:51:11,177 --> 00:51:12,428
means it's too late.
1002
00:51:12,429 --> 00:51:14,349
I've been calling this for years.
1003
00:51:14,350 --> 00:51:16,854
I told everyone about them,
1004
00:51:16,855 --> 00:51:18,858
little organisms on that meteor,
1005
00:51:18,859 --> 00:51:21,698
back on March 17th, 1978,
1006
00:51:21,699 --> 00:51:24,077
but they... they all
thought I was crazy.
1007
00:51:24,078 --> 00:51:25,246
We believe you.
1008
00:51:25,247 --> 00:51:27,960
That's why we're here,
asking for your help.
1009
00:51:27,961 --> 00:51:29,964
You don't believe me!
1010
00:51:29,965 --> 00:51:31,425
You're just all in trouble.
1011
00:51:31,426 --> 00:51:32,803
You know, that's the problem.
1012
00:51:32,804 --> 00:51:35,224
Folks need everything to make sense
1013
00:51:35,225 --> 00:51:37,103
before they believe what's happening
1014
00:51:37,104 --> 00:51:38,230
right in front of them,
1015
00:51:38,231 --> 00:51:40,736
and by then, it's too late.
1016
00:51:40,737 --> 00:51:41,863
Wow.
1017
00:51:41,864 --> 00:51:43,616
That is totally depressing
1018
00:51:43,617 --> 00:51:45,704
and unhelpful.
1019
00:51:45,705 --> 00:51:46,956
I'm ready to go.
1020
00:51:46,957 --> 00:51:48,125
Where are you off to?
1021
00:51:48,126 --> 00:51:51,131
I don't know, back to New York.
1022
00:51:51,132 --> 00:51:53,762
Stop it, we need to try.
1023
00:51:55,348 --> 00:51:57,644
Please, Ms. Shore, please.
1024
00:51:57,645 --> 00:52:00,357
Just... God, just tell
us what to do, okay?
1025
00:52:00,358 --> 00:52:02,403
My best friend is still out there.
1026
00:52:03,783 --> 00:52:05,159
Please.
1027
00:52:12,257 --> 00:52:14,010
They were as small as bugs
1028
00:52:14,011 --> 00:52:16,139
when I first observed them,
1029
00:52:16,140 --> 00:52:18,227
and it appears that, well,
1030
00:52:18,228 --> 00:52:22,360
they're finally evolving
into human size.
1031
00:52:22,361 --> 00:52:25,498
You know, them... them
shape-shifting imposters,
1032
00:52:25,499 --> 00:52:27,663
they're just taking
orders from the nest.
1033
00:52:27,664 --> 00:52:30,167
- The nest?
- They're like ants.
1034
00:52:30,168 --> 00:52:33,298
Super alien ants.
1035
00:52:33,299 --> 00:52:36,054
Once you destroy the nest,
1036
00:52:36,055 --> 00:52:37,306
they'll all come down.
1037
00:52:37,307 --> 00:52:38,433
Right.
1038
00:52:38,434 --> 00:52:40,437
They're just gonna keep
taking over human beings
1039
00:52:40,438 --> 00:52:42,568
with their kind, so they multiply.
1040
00:52:42,569 --> 00:52:44,822
You expect us to believe that?
1041
00:52:44,823 --> 00:52:46,701
That's insane.
1042
00:52:46,702 --> 00:52:48,976
The most logical explanation
1043
00:52:48,977 --> 00:52:52,796
is that this town is
infected with something.
1044
00:52:52,797 --> 00:52:53,882
Not aliens.
1045
00:52:53,883 --> 00:52:55,760
I don't expect anything
1046
00:52:55,761 --> 00:52:57,305
from you, young lady.
1047
00:52:57,306 --> 00:53:00,311
And you seem the type that's
too smart for her own good.
1048
00:53:00,312 --> 00:53:02,064
Okay, look, let's just say
1049
00:53:02,065 --> 00:53:05,070
that there's a nest somewhere.
1050
00:53:05,071 --> 00:53:06,699
How do we destroy it?
1051
00:53:28,744 --> 00:53:29,995
There's some C4
1052
00:53:29,996 --> 00:53:31,874
in that backpack on the third shelf.
1053
00:53:31,875 --> 00:53:33,878
- C4?
- What?
1054
00:53:33,879 --> 00:53:35,840
How else are you gonna blow up the nest?
1055
00:53:35,841 --> 00:53:38,972
I don't think we know where the nest is.
1056
00:53:38,973 --> 00:53:40,224
Do we?
1057
00:53:40,225 --> 00:53:41,351
- Oh!
- Sorry.
1058
00:53:41,352 --> 00:53:42,729
No, we haven't seen it yet.
1059
00:53:42,730 --> 00:53:45,067
Okay, well, when the meteor first hit,
1060
00:53:45,068 --> 00:53:46,236
it was in some field
1061
00:53:46,237 --> 00:53:48,115
next to that old,
abandoned Miller warehouse.
1062
00:53:48,116 --> 00:53:49,367
The Miller warehouse?
1063
00:53:49,368 --> 00:53:51,371
That's the last stop for
the pub crawl tonight.
1064
00:53:51,372 --> 00:53:52,833
They're probably already there.
1065
00:53:52,834 --> 00:53:54,252
That's why this is happening.
1066
00:53:54,253 --> 00:53:55,880
The aliens are defending themselves
1067
00:53:55,881 --> 00:53:57,383
against a bunch of drunk assholes
1068
00:53:57,384 --> 00:53:58,594
showing up at the nest,
1069
00:53:58,595 --> 00:54:00,598
and the nest must be
inside that warehouse.
1070
00:54:01,768 --> 00:54:04,105
Is something funny?
1071
00:54:04,106 --> 00:54:05,232
Yeah!
1072
00:54:05,233 --> 00:54:07,111
This whole thing.
1073
00:54:07,112 --> 00:54:08,530
Everything we've seen tonight,
1074
00:54:08,531 --> 00:54:11,231
all these nonsense theories
you guys are coming up with.
1075
00:54:11,232 --> 00:54:13,498
I know what I know,
and I saw what I saw.
1076
00:54:13,499 --> 00:54:16,004
So if you're not interested
in what I have to say,
1077
00:54:16,005 --> 00:54:17,758
then you can kindly fuck off
1078
00:54:17,759 --> 00:54:19,343
out of my house, young lady.
1079
00:54:19,344 --> 00:54:21,891
You know what, it's not a bad idea.
1080
00:54:21,892 --> 00:54:23,895
- I should go.
- Where?
1081
00:54:23,896 --> 00:54:27,111
Anywhere not here.
1082
00:54:27,112 --> 00:54:29,013
I don't know what's going on,
1083
00:54:29,014 --> 00:54:30,407
but we're just asking for trouble
1084
00:54:30,408 --> 00:54:31,660
if we go to that warehouse
1085
00:54:31,661 --> 00:54:32,996
and join back up with the pub crawl.
1086
00:54:32,997 --> 00:54:35,125
Yuejin, we have to find Chloe,
1087
00:54:35,126 --> 00:54:37,171
and we need all the
help that we can get,
1088
00:54:37,172 --> 00:54:40,010
so cut this shit out.
1089
00:54:40,011 --> 00:54:42,641
You really don't get it, Misty.
1090
00:54:42,642 --> 00:54:44,435
Yeah, I'm not gonna stick around
1091
00:54:44,436 --> 00:54:46,941
for this hillbilly, E.T. bullshit.
1092
00:54:46,942 --> 00:54:49,947
- Good luck with the nest.
- Yuejin!
1093
00:54:49,948 --> 00:54:51,533
Yuejin!
1094
00:54:55,458 --> 00:54:57,963
All right, let's gear up.
1095
00:54:59,884 --> 00:55:01,637
Hey.
1096
00:55:01,638 --> 00:55:03,808
You sure you're ready for this?
1097
00:55:03,809 --> 00:55:06,020
I don't think we have a choice.
1098
00:55:11,908 --> 00:55:14,831
Fucking Podunk town.
1099
00:55:41,593 --> 00:55:42,969
Oh, shit.
1100
00:55:44,306 --> 00:55:46,685
Where'd you get that?
1101
00:55:46,686 --> 00:55:48,188
Dead alien.
1102
00:55:49,859 --> 00:55:51,444
Yuejin, what the fuck?
1103
00:55:51,445 --> 00:55:52,488
What happened?
1104
00:55:52,489 --> 00:55:53,991
Hey, wait!
1105
00:55:53,992 --> 00:55:55,703
I changed my mind.
1106
00:55:55,704 --> 00:55:57,498
I'm coming with you guys.
1107
00:55:57,499 --> 00:55:58,500
What happened?
1108
00:55:58,501 --> 00:56:00,128
One of them chased me.
1109
00:56:00,129 --> 00:56:03,886
I got away, but, fuck, that was stupid.
1110
00:56:03,887 --> 00:56:05,389
You were right.
1111
00:56:05,390 --> 00:56:07,142
We should stick together.
1112
00:56:08,605 --> 00:56:10,399
Welcome back.
1113
00:56:10,400 --> 00:56:11,902
All right.
1114
00:56:11,903 --> 00:56:14,532
You guys ready to party?
1115
00:56:14,533 --> 00:56:17,246
You don't have to tell me twice.
1116
00:56:17,247 --> 00:56:18,916
Let's do this.
1117
00:56:22,507 --> 00:56:23,968
I'll be back, you know.
1118
00:56:23,969 --> 00:56:26,014
I know you will.
1119
00:56:26,015 --> 00:56:27,767
You gonna be okay here?
1120
00:56:42,297 --> 00:56:43,674
What the...
1121
00:56:51,816 --> 00:56:55,573
What'd you say happen to
that guy who chased you again?
1122
00:56:55,574 --> 00:56:57,660
I guess he just took off.
1123
00:57:01,418 --> 00:57:03,213
What?
1124
00:57:03,214 --> 00:57:04,825
- We clear?
- Yeah.
1125
00:57:04,826 --> 00:57:06,678
Then fuck it. Let's just go.
1126
00:57:16,658 --> 00:57:19,203
Okay, so we find the nest,
1127
00:57:19,204 --> 00:57:21,332
blow it up, save Chloe...
1128
00:57:21,333 --> 00:57:23,712
and the world?
1129
00:57:23,713 --> 00:57:25,174
No big deal.
1130
00:57:29,075 --> 00:57:30,901
Okay, so at this point,
1131
00:57:30,902 --> 00:57:32,605
we are armed, slightly buzzed,
1132
00:57:32,606 --> 00:57:34,985
and ready to kick some alien ass.
1133
00:57:34,986 --> 00:57:36,613
Oh, in case you're wondering,
1134
00:57:36,614 --> 00:57:38,576
the nest is the physical nexus
1135
00:57:38,577 --> 00:57:40,580
of the metamorph psionic neural net.
1136
00:57:40,581 --> 00:57:43,627
Like, uh, alien Wi-Fi.
1137
00:57:43,628 --> 00:57:45,840
The shared brain that controls them all.
1138
00:57:45,841 --> 00:57:47,594
At least that was the theory.
1139
00:57:47,595 --> 00:57:48,971
Nobody had ever seen it before,
1140
00:57:48,972 --> 00:57:50,508
but if it existed,
1141
00:57:50,509 --> 00:57:52,812
which we were, like,
98% sure that it did,
1142
00:57:52,813 --> 00:57:54,816
aliens would totally keep
it hidden because it's,
1143
00:57:54,817 --> 00:57:57,614
like, a kill switch
for their entire army.
1144
00:57:57,615 --> 00:57:58,699
Luckily, though,
1145
00:57:58,700 --> 00:58:00,076
neural energy has a limited range,
1146
00:58:00,077 --> 00:58:01,705
so we knew that it couldn't be far.
1147
00:58:01,706 --> 00:58:04,335
But, uh, as we were driving around town,
1148
00:58:04,336 --> 00:58:07,592
we started to realize that we
might be running out of time.
1149
00:58:07,593 --> 00:58:10,013
Normally there'd be
kids all over the place,
1150
00:58:10,014 --> 00:58:12,769
running around, drinking, making out,
1151
00:58:12,770 --> 00:58:15,273
puking, making out
again with puke breath,
1152
00:58:15,274 --> 00:58:18,864
but it was just... empty.
1153
00:58:18,865 --> 00:58:20,868
Like a ghost town.
1154
00:58:20,869 --> 00:58:22,120
Best I figured,
1155
00:58:22,121 --> 00:58:24,668
most of them had already been replaced.
1156
00:58:24,669 --> 00:58:27,507
Ipso facto, dead.
1157
00:58:59,529 --> 00:59:01,575
Shauna?
1158
00:59:01,576 --> 00:59:03,829
You okay?
1159
00:59:03,830 --> 00:59:05,708
Yeah.
1160
00:59:05,709 --> 00:59:07,294
Are you sure?
1161
00:59:10,076 --> 00:59:11,136
I don't know.
1162
00:59:11,137 --> 00:59:12,429
Part of me should be happy
1163
00:59:12,430 --> 00:59:14,433
because me and my mom were fucking right
1164
00:59:14,434 --> 00:59:15,876
the entire time,
1165
00:59:15,877 --> 00:59:17,779
but I'm also kind of freaking out
1166
00:59:17,780 --> 00:59:20,571
because us being right
means that people are dying
1167
00:59:20,572 --> 00:59:22,951
and the world might end.
1168
00:59:23,828 --> 00:59:25,706
That's pretty dark.
1169
00:59:25,707 --> 00:59:26,959
Yeah.
1170
00:59:34,850 --> 00:59:36,227
What?
1171
00:59:36,228 --> 00:59:38,607
You really care about her, don't you?
1172
00:59:38,608 --> 00:59:41,112
Chloe?
1173
00:59:41,113 --> 00:59:42,615
She's my best friend.
1174
00:59:42,616 --> 00:59:44,451
Best friend?
1175
00:59:44,452 --> 00:59:48,752
Hmm, so then what happened
these last few weeks?
1176
00:59:49,839 --> 00:59:50,965
It was just...
1177
00:59:50,966 --> 00:59:54,597
the whole thing with me and Michael.
1178
00:59:58,188 --> 01:00:00,233
I just remember telling Chloe about it
1179
01:00:00,234 --> 01:00:04,074
the next morning and...
1180
01:00:04,075 --> 01:00:07,080
and I couldn't tell if
she believed me or not.
1181
01:00:10,129 --> 01:00:11,882
But that's just Chloe.
1182
01:00:13,135 --> 01:00:15,639
She never really takes
anything seriously,
1183
01:00:15,640 --> 01:00:20,649
and life is just fun and carefree.
1184
01:00:22,278 --> 01:00:23,781
Hmm.
1185
01:00:23,782 --> 01:00:26,118
Sounds like...
1186
01:00:26,119 --> 01:00:29,291
Chloe made the right choice.
1187
01:00:29,292 --> 01:00:31,797
- Excuse me?
- Well, I can't blame her.
1188
01:00:31,798 --> 01:00:33,226
You're a glutton for punishment
1189
01:00:33,227 --> 01:00:35,136
who surrounds herself
with drama and psychosis,
1190
01:00:35,137 --> 01:00:38,336
like a conspiracy theorist
and her mom, for example.
1191
01:00:38,337 --> 01:00:40,015
- Yuejin, chill!
- Hey, fuck you!
1192
01:00:40,016 --> 01:00:42,251
You don't know anything
about me and Chloe.
1193
01:00:42,252 --> 01:00:45,156
In fact, I don't know how
Chloe ever put up
1194
01:00:45,157 --> 01:00:46,534
with your bullshit.
1195
01:00:46,535 --> 01:00:47,995
Stop the car.
1196
01:00:47,996 --> 01:00:49,164
What?
1197
01:00:50,417 --> 01:00:52,003
Stop the car!
1198
01:00:59,687 --> 01:01:01,438
- What the fuck, Misty?
- Get out!
1199
01:01:01,439 --> 01:01:02,817
Hey, what's going on?
1200
01:01:02,818 --> 01:01:05,154
- This bitch is an alien.
- What are you talking about?
1201
01:01:05,155 --> 01:01:06,323
She sees an alien,
1202
01:01:06,324 --> 01:01:07,577
lives to tell about it,
1203
01:01:07,578 --> 01:01:09,142
and then there's... there's no evidence
1204
01:01:09,143 --> 01:01:10,809
of this so-called alien
when we get outside
1205
01:01:10,810 --> 01:01:13,087
- because she's one of them!
- She's just pissed off
1206
01:01:13,088 --> 01:01:15,383
because Chloe's replacing her
with me as her number one.
1207
01:01:15,384 --> 01:01:16,427
Oh, fuck off!
1208
01:01:16,428 --> 01:01:18,014
Okay, this is crazy, you guys.
1209
01:01:18,015 --> 01:01:19,182
Is it though?
1210
01:01:19,183 --> 01:01:20,785
She did disappear for a while
1211
01:01:20,786 --> 01:01:22,450
and came back with
this brand new attitude,
1212
01:01:22,451 --> 01:01:23,901
and we've seen weirder shit tonight.
1213
01:01:23,902 --> 01:01:25,194
It's because I was trying to avoid
1214
01:01:25,195 --> 01:01:26,530
going on a suicide mission.
1215
01:01:26,531 --> 01:01:28,490
Oh, so then what happened?
Why are you here now?
1216
01:01:28,491 --> 01:01:30,204
And how do we know
that you're not an alien?
1217
01:01:30,205 --> 01:01:31,332
You and your mom?
1218
01:01:31,333 --> 01:01:32,984
How do we know that you
guys didn't just roofie
1219
01:01:32,985 --> 01:01:34,964
this whole town with your radiated weed?
1220
01:01:34,965 --> 01:01:37,052
What the fuck did you just
say about me and my family?
1221
01:01:37,053 --> 01:01:38,429
- All right, come on.
- Guys.
1222
01:01:38,430 --> 01:01:40,224
There's an easy way to settle this.
1223
01:01:43,440 --> 01:01:45,318
We're all gonna prick our fingers,
1224
01:01:45,319 --> 01:01:47,865
and everyone who bleeds red is human.
1225
01:01:50,580 --> 01:01:52,123
I'll do it.
1226
01:01:57,093 --> 01:01:58,219
All right.
1227
01:01:58,220 --> 01:01:59,584
I appreciate the support, Aaron,
1228
01:01:59,585 --> 01:02:00,861
but we all know that you're human
1229
01:02:00,862 --> 01:02:03,104
because of the gaping
flesh wound on your leg.
1230
01:02:03,105 --> 01:02:05,441
Oh, yeah, right, right, okay.
1231
01:02:05,442 --> 01:02:07,863
So, who's next?
1232
01:02:07,864 --> 01:02:09,449
Since you're the one accusing people,
1233
01:02:09,450 --> 01:02:11,621
- why don't you go?
- Fine by me.
1234
01:02:23,987 --> 01:02:25,179
See, she took us
1235
01:02:25,180 --> 01:02:26,860
to that creepy old hoarder's house,
1236
01:02:26,861 --> 01:02:29,493
a woman who, by the
way, conveniently told us
1237
01:02:29,494 --> 01:02:31,326
to blow up a warehouse party
1238
01:02:31,327 --> 01:02:33,272
based on some bullshit story
1239
01:02:33,273 --> 01:02:34,416
about the nest or whatever?
1240
01:02:34,417 --> 01:02:36,045
Well, maybe you don't
want us going to the nest
1241
01:02:36,046 --> 01:02:37,631
because you're a
shit-sucking alien fuck!
1242
01:02:37,632 --> 01:02:38,967
And maybe you're as crazy
1243
01:02:38,968 --> 01:02:40,637
- as your fucking mama is.
- Fuck you!
1244
01:02:40,638 --> 01:02:42,098
Okay, Shauna, just show her
1245
01:02:42,099 --> 01:02:43,267
that you have human blood.
1246
01:02:43,268 --> 01:02:44,729
Give me the fucking knife.
1247
01:02:50,658 --> 01:02:53,537
I'll show you the truth.
1248
01:02:53,538 --> 01:02:55,667
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, hey!
1249
01:02:55,668 --> 01:02:58,882
- Oh my God!
- Fuck!
1250
01:02:58,883 --> 01:03:00,552
Oh, look at that.
1251
01:03:00,553 --> 01:03:02,263
Not an alien.
1252
01:03:05,437 --> 01:03:07,398
Don't let her get the bag!
1253
01:03:24,893 --> 01:03:27,272
Oh, man.
1254
01:03:27,273 --> 01:03:28,274
Fuck.
1255
01:03:28,275 --> 01:03:30,946
Fuck, let's go, let's go.
1256
01:03:30,947 --> 01:03:32,783
Come on.
1257
01:03:32,784 --> 01:03:34,452
Okay.
1258
01:03:47,354 --> 01:03:49,734
And then there were three.
1259
01:04:07,979 --> 01:04:09,857
This is the place?
1260
01:04:09,858 --> 01:04:13,072
Yup, this is where it all started.
1261
01:04:13,073 --> 01:04:14,951
Do you think we're too late?
1262
01:04:14,952 --> 01:04:16,996
Only one way to find out.
1263
01:04:18,375 --> 01:04:19,501
Oh my God.
1264
01:04:20,755 --> 01:04:22,006
Shit.
1265
01:04:23,260 --> 01:04:24,511
What do you think, aliens?
1266
01:04:24,512 --> 01:04:25,764
I think they're just drunk.
1267
01:04:25,765 --> 01:04:27,141
Well, should we warn them?
1268
01:04:27,142 --> 01:04:29,020
Yeah.
1269
01:04:29,021 --> 01:04:31,859
Hey! Don't go in there!
1270
01:04:31,860 --> 01:04:33,404
Fuck you!
1271
01:04:33,405 --> 01:04:35,283
Well, they're dead.
1272
01:04:50,773 --> 01:04:53,027
So, do we think Chloe's here?
1273
01:04:53,028 --> 01:04:54,989
It's the end of the crawl.
1274
01:04:54,990 --> 01:04:56,617
She has to be.
1275
01:05:06,429 --> 01:05:07,931
All right, once we find the nest,
1276
01:05:07,932 --> 01:05:09,560
I'll plant the charges and set the timer
1277
01:05:09,561 --> 01:05:10,562
for five minutes.
1278
01:05:10,563 --> 01:05:12,148
Aaron, you pull the fire alarm.
1279
01:05:12,149 --> 01:05:13,400
Everybody will evacuate,
1280
01:05:13,401 --> 01:05:15,446
and we'll bounce before
we're blown to bits.
1281
01:05:15,447 --> 01:05:17,408
So, what are the rules of engagement
1282
01:05:17,409 --> 01:05:19,287
for humans and/or aliens?
1283
01:05:19,288 --> 01:05:21,766
- Rules of engagement?
- Chill out, Ramboner.
1284
01:05:21,767 --> 01:05:24,420
Just assume everyone's
an alien, all right?
1285
01:05:24,421 --> 01:05:25,764
Punch or stun them with weapons
1286
01:05:25,765 --> 01:05:27,303
if they get too close or aggressive.
1287
01:05:27,304 --> 01:05:29,809
What if it's Chloe?
1288
01:05:29,810 --> 01:05:31,395
No exceptions.
1289
01:05:35,571 --> 01:05:36,781
All right, y'all.
1290
01:05:36,782 --> 01:05:38,660
Last chance to pull
the ripcord and bail.
1291
01:05:38,661 --> 01:05:39,954
No way, José.
1292
01:05:39,955 --> 01:05:42,083
We're in this together now.
1293
01:05:44,965 --> 01:05:46,968
Yeah, let's do this.
1294
01:06:00,746 --> 01:06:03,375
Um, where is everyone?
1295
01:06:03,376 --> 01:06:05,463
Did they just go home?
1296
01:06:05,464 --> 01:06:06,506
Fuck.
1297
01:06:06,507 --> 01:06:08,302
Maybe everyone's already an alien,
1298
01:06:08,303 --> 01:06:09,805
and these people are too wasted
1299
01:06:09,806 --> 01:06:11,099
to realize that they're next.
1300
01:06:11,100 --> 01:06:14,481
This is the lamest pub crawl ever.
1301
01:06:14,482 --> 01:06:16,819
Do you guys see Chloe?
1302
01:06:16,820 --> 01:06:18,363
Hey, hey, where are you going?
1303
01:06:18,364 --> 01:06:19,700
I'm just looking, I just wanna...
1304
01:06:19,701 --> 01:06:21,119
No, come on, we gotta stay focused
1305
01:06:21,120 --> 01:06:22,330
and stay together.
1306
01:06:22,331 --> 01:06:24,000
Let's keep going.
1307
01:06:28,009 --> 01:06:29,845
What's up, bro?
1308
01:06:29,846 --> 01:06:32,643
What the fuck, Michael?
1309
01:06:32,644 --> 01:06:34,270
What the fuck is this?
1310
01:06:39,741 --> 01:06:41,117
What?
1311
01:06:41,118 --> 01:06:43,539
I thought you said no exceptions.
1312
01:06:52,892 --> 01:06:54,143
It's red.
1313
01:06:54,144 --> 01:06:55,396
He's not an alien.
1314
01:06:55,397 --> 01:06:56,774
Either way...
1315
01:06:56,775 --> 01:06:58,527
Come on.
1316
01:07:05,375 --> 01:07:07,295
Okay, well,
1317
01:07:07,296 --> 01:07:09,550
I mean, it wouldn't just
be out here in the open
1318
01:07:09,551 --> 01:07:12,138
for everyone to see it, so...
1319
01:07:20,573 --> 01:07:22,325
Weird alien goo dripping
1320
01:07:22,326 --> 01:07:25,331
from an unknown source above us.
1321
01:07:25,332 --> 01:07:27,543
It's probably up there.
1322
01:07:29,423 --> 01:07:30,884
All right.
1323
01:07:30,885 --> 01:07:32,804
Let's check it out.
1324
01:08:00,360 --> 01:08:02,113
Jesus Christ.
1325
01:08:02,114 --> 01:08:03,950
- Oh my God.
- Wow.
1326
01:08:11,633 --> 01:08:14,930
How did your mom predict all this?
1327
01:08:14,931 --> 01:08:17,686
She first discovered
them when the meteor hit,
1328
01:08:17,687 --> 01:08:20,859
and then she spent her
entire life researching.
1329
01:08:20,860 --> 01:08:22,904
Nobody believed her.
1330
01:08:22,905 --> 01:08:25,284
Everybody just thought
she was, like, wasted
1331
01:08:25,285 --> 01:08:27,371
'cause it happened on St. Patrick's Day.
1332
01:08:27,372 --> 01:08:28,624
Once we destroy this thing,
1333
01:08:28,625 --> 01:08:30,377
all the aliens will die, right?
1334
01:08:30,378 --> 01:08:33,049
Well, that's the theory.
1335
01:08:34,511 --> 01:08:36,181
Well, let's blow this shit up
1336
01:08:36,182 --> 01:08:37,934
and get the hell outta here.
1337
01:08:40,566 --> 01:08:43,153
Whoa. You sure you
know what you're doing?
1338
01:08:43,154 --> 01:08:45,449
Yeah, yeah. Me and Mom
used to blow up cars
1339
01:08:45,450 --> 01:08:46,952
at the junkyard all the time.
1340
01:08:46,953 --> 01:08:48,455
I was like six,
1341
01:08:48,456 --> 01:08:50,167
but I still remember the process.
1342
01:08:50,168 --> 01:08:51,921
That's really reassuring.
1343
01:08:58,392 --> 01:09:00,939
- She's here!
- Who?
1344
01:09:00,940 --> 01:09:02,441
Chloe, Chloe, she's down below.
1345
01:09:02,442 --> 01:09:04,780
No, no, no, no, no,
do not go down there,
1346
01:09:04,781 --> 01:09:06,659
no exceptions!
1347
01:09:06,660 --> 01:09:08,328
Chloe, Chloe!
1348
01:09:11,460 --> 01:09:14,800
- Chloe?
- Misty!
1349
01:09:14,801 --> 01:09:15,969
Dude!
1350
01:09:17,180 --> 01:09:19,100
Holy shit!
1351
01:09:19,101 --> 01:09:22,064
Chloe, I'm sorry
for walking away from you
1352
01:09:22,065 --> 01:09:24,009
at the pub and leaving you alone...
1353
01:09:24,010 --> 01:09:25,947
You won't believe the shit
that's happened to me tonight.
1354
01:09:25,948 --> 01:09:28,118
First of all, Aaron attacked me.
1355
01:09:28,119 --> 01:09:29,705
Did you... did you not hear me?
1356
01:09:29,706 --> 01:09:31,876
Aaron attacked me, he's a psycho.
1357
01:09:31,877 --> 01:09:33,713
Girl, it is a long story,
1358
01:09:33,714 --> 01:09:36,677
but just believe me, that was not Aaron.
1359
01:09:39,851 --> 01:09:43,983
Ugh, you are nasty.
1360
01:09:43,984 --> 01:09:46,362
What are you made out of?
1361
01:09:46,363 --> 01:09:48,252
All right, timer's set.
1362
01:09:48,253 --> 01:09:49,745
We have five minutes
to get back to the car.
1363
01:09:49,746 --> 01:09:51,205
Whoa, whoa, wait, what are you doing?
1364
01:09:51,206 --> 01:09:52,249
Don't fucking touch it!
1365
01:09:52,250 --> 01:09:54,337
You just tripped some alien alarm.
1366
01:09:56,091 --> 01:09:57,384
Oh my God.
1367
01:09:57,385 --> 01:09:58,638
Fuck, you are such an idiot.
1368
01:09:58,639 --> 01:10:00,642
We really have to go now, come on.
1369
01:10:05,653 --> 01:10:07,529
No, no, no, it was for sure Aaron,
1370
01:10:07,530 --> 01:10:09,533
and he for sure attacked me.
1371
01:10:11,246 --> 01:10:12,373
What was that?
1372
01:10:12,374 --> 01:10:15,253
What the fuck kind of noise?
1373
01:10:17,217 --> 01:10:19,512
- What is happening...
- Hey, hey, hey.
1374
01:10:19,513 --> 01:10:21,767
Hi, uh, timer's set,
we gotta go right now.
1375
01:10:21,768 --> 01:10:23,144
Oh, no, no, no, no!
1376
01:10:23,145 --> 01:10:24,898
Hey, you found Chloe.
1377
01:10:24,899 --> 01:10:26,735
Get the fuck away from me.
1378
01:10:26,736 --> 01:10:27,779
- Chloe...
- What?
1379
01:10:27,780 --> 01:10:28,781
Okay, Chloe,
1380
01:10:28,782 --> 01:10:31,285
- Aaron didn't attack you.
- What?
1381
01:10:31,286 --> 01:10:33,114
Misty, I know what happened.
1382
01:10:33,115 --> 01:10:34,516
This is not your made-up bullshit.
1383
01:10:34,517 --> 01:10:36,421
Wait, wait, how do
you know she's not an alien?
1384
01:10:36,422 --> 01:10:37,423
I'm sorry, what?
1385
01:10:37,424 --> 01:10:38,634
Here, here, check her blood.
1386
01:10:38,635 --> 01:10:40,137
What did he say?
1387
01:10:41,432 --> 01:10:43,376
It's okay, it's me, it's me, okay?
1388
01:10:43,377 --> 01:10:45,325
I know this doesn't make
sense at all right now,
1389
01:10:45,326 --> 01:10:46,692
but this is something that we have to do
1390
01:10:46,693 --> 01:10:48,571
to make sure, just trust me.
1391
01:10:48,572 --> 01:10:50,532
I'm not gonna let you cut me!
1392
01:10:50,533 --> 01:10:51,952
You're fucking crazy!
1393
01:10:51,953 --> 01:10:53,530
I knew you were fucking mental!
1394
01:10:53,531 --> 01:10:54,916
Hey, hey, hey, last chance.
1395
01:10:54,917 --> 01:10:56,545
If I get to the car and
you guys aren't there,
1396
01:10:56,546 --> 01:10:57,964
I swear to fuck I am taking off.
1397
01:10:57,965 --> 01:10:59,425
The bomb's gonna go off any minute now.
1398
01:10:59,426 --> 01:11:01,429
- Now there's a bomb?
- Yes, a bomb!
1399
01:11:01,430 --> 01:11:03,516
And Aaron just let every alien in town
1400
01:11:03,517 --> 01:11:04,561
know that we're here.
1401
01:11:04,562 --> 01:11:06,147
We gotta go now. Get to the fire alarm.
1402
01:11:06,148 --> 01:11:07,942
We need to get everyone out of here.
1403
01:11:07,943 --> 01:11:09,696
Chloe, are you kidding?
1404
01:11:09,697 --> 01:11:12,076
Get away from me, psycho!
1405
01:11:15,793 --> 01:11:17,712
Oh, shit!
1406
01:11:48,107 --> 01:11:50,110
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
1407
01:11:50,111 --> 01:11:52,489
Fuck, Aaron! What are you doing?
1408
01:11:52,490 --> 01:11:54,076
Um, I'm saving you.
1409
01:11:54,077 --> 01:11:55,830
Which way is the exit?
1410
01:11:55,831 --> 01:11:57,709
It's that way, come on.
1411
01:12:07,771 --> 01:12:09,356
Chloe!
1412
01:12:14,159 --> 01:12:16,495
Let her go.
1413
01:12:16,496 --> 01:12:18,541
Get the fuck off me.
1414
01:12:21,256 --> 01:12:24,136
Oh, I'm gonna kill the fuck outta you.
1415
01:12:25,264 --> 01:12:27,769
Fuck, Michael, get off of me!
1416
01:12:27,770 --> 01:12:30,775
Let me go, you psycho fucker!
1417
01:12:34,115 --> 01:12:36,435
Get the fuck off me!
1418
01:12:37,498 --> 01:12:39,500
Fuck, did you just bite me?
1419
01:12:41,380 --> 01:12:42,924
Fucking psycho.
1420
01:12:47,685 --> 01:12:49,061
Misty?
1421
01:12:49,062 --> 01:12:50,815
Holy fuck!
1422
01:12:50,816 --> 01:12:52,569
Oh, fuck.
1423
01:12:54,322 --> 01:12:55,448
Shoot that thing!
1424
01:12:55,449 --> 01:12:56,910
Shoot it, it bit me, it bit me!
1425
01:12:56,911 --> 01:12:59,279
I don't even know what
the fuck is happening,
1426
01:12:59,280 --> 01:13:00,417
and no, I did not!
1427
01:13:00,418 --> 01:13:02,839
Don't move, I will
kill you both if I have to.
1428
01:13:02,840 --> 01:13:05,051
Um, guys, the clock
is kinda ticking here.
1429
01:13:05,052 --> 01:13:06,555
Well, dude, you better hurry up.
1430
01:13:06,556 --> 01:13:08,182
Which one is it?
1431
01:13:08,183 --> 01:13:10,646
- Misty, it's me.
- Misty...
1432
01:13:10,647 --> 01:13:12,567
You gotta believe me.
1433
01:13:12,568 --> 01:13:15,196
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!
1434
01:13:15,197 --> 01:13:16,407
Fuck.
1435
01:13:23,715 --> 01:13:25,718
Hey, Chloe?
1436
01:13:26,971 --> 01:13:28,724
Do you trust me?
1437
01:13:28,725 --> 01:13:29,976
What?
1438
01:13:29,977 --> 01:13:32,732
To do this, to choose the right one.
1439
01:13:32,733 --> 01:13:34,736
Do you trust me?
1440
01:13:34,737 --> 01:13:36,364
Of course I trust you.
1441
01:13:36,365 --> 01:13:38,117
You're my best friend.
1442
01:13:40,874 --> 01:13:42,877
And what about you?
1443
01:13:44,757 --> 01:13:47,094
Am I your best friend?
1444
01:13:47,095 --> 01:13:49,348
I don't fucking know!
I just don't want to die.
1445
01:13:49,349 --> 01:13:50,433
Please don't kill me.
1446
01:13:50,434 --> 01:13:52,062
Please don't kill me!
1447
01:14:03,085 --> 01:14:04,713
Let's go.
1448
01:14:06,592 --> 01:14:07,885
Okay.
1449
01:14:30,640 --> 01:14:34,229
Misty, how did you know it was me?
1450
01:14:36,903 --> 01:14:39,406
I knew my Chloe wouldn't lie to me.
1451
01:14:39,407 --> 01:14:42,162
You only care about yourself, so...
1452
01:14:42,163 --> 01:14:45,794
I knew that you wouldn't just...
1453
01:14:45,795 --> 01:14:48,007
tell me what I wanted to hear.
1454
01:14:51,557 --> 01:14:53,184
Oh, shit!
1455
01:14:55,189 --> 01:14:56,691
Goodbye, aliens!
1456
01:14:56,692 --> 01:14:58,069
Peace out, bitches!
1457
01:14:58,070 --> 01:14:59,321
- Woo!
- Woo!
1458
01:15:02,036 --> 01:15:03,037
Yes!
1459
01:15:04,583 --> 01:15:06,460
So they're all dead now, right?
1460
01:15:06,461 --> 01:15:07,588
- Yup.
- Okay.
1461
01:15:07,589 --> 01:15:08,991
Can I at least take you to dinner?
1462
01:15:08,992 --> 01:15:10,052
Nope.
1463
01:15:10,053 --> 01:15:11,805
Okay, how about coffee?
1464
01:15:11,806 --> 01:15:13,307
Maybe.
1465
01:15:14,770 --> 01:15:16,940
So, as you can probably guess,
1466
01:15:16,941 --> 01:15:18,401
Misty unfollowed Chloe
1467
01:15:18,402 --> 01:15:20,321
and hasn't looked back.
1468
01:15:20,322 --> 01:15:22,660
And as hard as it is to believe,
1469
01:15:22,661 --> 01:15:25,290
her and I have actually
gotten kinda close.
1470
01:15:25,291 --> 01:15:28,045
I mean, she's still a princess, but...
1471
01:15:28,046 --> 01:15:29,966
she's actually kinda cool.
1472
01:15:29,967 --> 01:15:32,220
And Aaron?
1473
01:15:32,221 --> 01:15:35,101
Well, he's still a doofus,
1474
01:15:35,102 --> 01:15:38,357
but we've been kind of
hanging out a lot lately,
1475
01:15:38,358 --> 01:15:40,361
and... I don't know.
1476
01:15:40,362 --> 01:15:43,702
Definitely not putting
labels on it or anything.
1477
01:15:43,703 --> 01:15:46,123
So, anyways,
1478
01:15:46,124 --> 01:15:48,377
that is the story of
how me and my friends
1479
01:15:48,378 --> 01:15:51,258
managed to stop an alien invasion.
1480
01:15:51,259 --> 01:15:52,553
Wild, right?
1481
01:15:52,554 --> 01:15:55,475
I mean, me, friends.
1482
01:15:55,476 --> 01:15:57,605
Of course, the feds showed up after
1483
01:15:57,606 --> 01:15:59,358
with, like, tons of questions
1484
01:15:59,359 --> 01:16:00,986
and not so subtly implied
1485
01:16:00,987 --> 01:16:03,075
that this was all highly top secret,
1486
01:16:03,076 --> 01:16:07,123
and "snitches get stitches"
and all that, but...
1487
01:16:07,124 --> 01:16:09,461
well, fuck it.
1488
01:16:09,462 --> 01:16:10,881
There might be more nests out there,
1489
01:16:10,882 --> 01:16:12,718
and it's not like those G-men did much
1490
01:16:12,719 --> 01:16:14,137
to stop the last one.
1491
01:16:14,138 --> 01:16:15,599
Alan Moore once said that,
1492
01:16:15,600 --> 01:16:18,354
"The truth of the world
is that it's chaotic.
1493
01:16:18,355 --> 01:16:22,905
The truth is not some finely
tuned conspiracy theory.
1494
01:16:22,906 --> 01:16:26,621
The truth is something
far more frightening.
1495
01:16:26,622 --> 01:16:28,290
Nobody is in control.
1496
01:16:28,291 --> 01:16:31,046
The world is rudderless".
1497
01:16:31,047 --> 01:16:33,008
Well, bitches,
1498
01:16:33,009 --> 01:16:36,390
these broadcasts are your instructions.
1499
01:16:36,391 --> 01:16:38,519
Seek and destroy.
1500
01:16:38,520 --> 01:16:40,273
Consider me your rudder.
1501
01:16:46,161 --> 01:16:48,749
Well, shit.
1502
01:16:48,750 --> 01:16:50,794
Mom, they're back!
1503
01:16:50,795 --> 01:16:52,548
Get your shotgun!
1504
01:17:09,332 --> 01:17:10,918
You just have to believe me,
1505
01:17:10,919 --> 01:17:13,840
that was not Aaron.
1506
01:17:13,841 --> 01:17:15,176
Cut.
1507
01:17:15,177 --> 01:17:17,138
Pretty sure it was Aaron.
1508
01:17:17,139 --> 01:17:19,685
- Maybe it was.
- It looked like Aaron.
1509
01:17:24,947 --> 01:17:26,825
You guys ready to party?
1510
01:17:26,826 --> 01:17:28,327
You don't have to tell me twi...
1511
01:17:28,328 --> 01:17:29,538
Let me take that again.
1512
01:17:30,583 --> 01:17:33,170
Sorry.
1513
01:17:33,171 --> 01:17:36,093
Guys, you can't laugh for every one.
1514
01:17:36,094 --> 01:17:39,432
You don't have to tell me twice.
1515
01:17:57,219 --> 01:17:59,222
Cut. Nailed it!
1516
01:18:01,436 --> 01:18:04,107
Wow, you're just lumping us all...
1517
01:18:12,374 --> 01:18:13,877
Chloe!
1518
01:18:13,878 --> 01:18:15,004
Sorry.
1519
01:18:15,005 --> 01:18:17,133
I don't know what that was.
1520
01:18:22,646 --> 01:18:24,649
How do we know that you
guys didn't just roofie
1521
01:18:24,650 --> 01:18:27,528
this town with your radiated m...
1522
01:18:27,529 --> 01:18:29,407
Fucking fuck my life.
1523
01:18:29,408 --> 01:18:30,869
That's okay, it's okay.
1524
01:18:30,870 --> 01:18:32,288
I'm so sorry, guys.
1525
01:18:43,228 --> 01:18:44,270
Cut.
1526
01:18:44,271 --> 01:18:45,523
I don't know what just happened.
1527
01:18:45,524 --> 01:18:46,901
I don't know what just happened.
1528
01:18:56,170 --> 01:18:57,666
- What?
- You should come
1529
01:18:57,667 --> 01:19:00,511
to New York with us for spring break.
1530
01:19:03,435 --> 01:19:04,562
What?
1531
01:19:07,569 --> 01:19:09,446
Seatbelts, everybody!
1532
01:19:24,060 --> 01:19:25,937
Wow, I think I love you.
1533
01:19:25,938 --> 01:19:27,941
I love you!
1534
01:19:27,942 --> 01:19:29,152
Holy shit!
1535
01:19:29,153 --> 01:19:30,697
You're my dream woman.
1536
01:19:30,698 --> 01:19:32,330
Fuck, you almost shot me,
1537
01:19:32,331 --> 01:19:33,857
but I'm really turned on right now
1538
01:19:33,858 --> 01:19:36,259
and I'm probably bleeding out
and that's probably why, but...
1539
01:19:45,102 --> 01:19:47,480
- What?
- So sorry, can we...
1540
01:19:47,481 --> 01:19:49,317
Sorry, can we start over?
1541
01:19:49,318 --> 01:19:50,987
Oh my God, what the fuck?
1542
01:19:52,116 --> 01:19:54,745
She laughs every time I look at her.
1543
01:19:54,746 --> 01:19:55,997
Okay.
1544
01:20:04,348 --> 01:20:05,684
The fuck?
1545
01:20:05,685 --> 01:20:07,604
Cut.
1546
01:20:12,114 --> 01:20:13,867
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
1547
01:20:23,846 --> 01:20:25,765
Pot of gold, throw your cup!
1548
01:20:25,766 --> 01:20:27,603
- What?
- What?
1549
01:20:49,021 --> 01:20:50,857
Well...
1550
01:20:50,858 --> 01:20:52,653
We're all fu...
1551
01:20:54,783 --> 01:20:56,034
Falafel.
105559
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