Original subtitles

SONG: ♪ Volare... ♪

MAN: ..nation-building project...

KEVIN RUDD: ..new infrastructure of the 21st century.

WOMAN: If there is a buzzword in this Budget, it's 'nation-building'.

ANTHONY ALBANESE: Major infrastructure projects right around the country.

MAN 2: Real projects, real money.

MAN 3: A transformational vision for the infrastructure of the 21st century.

TONY ABBOTT: I want to be known as the infrastructure prime minister.

-Nation-building... -Nation-building for recovery.

-..nation-building program... -..nation-building...

-Nation-building. -Nation-building.

SONG: ♪ We can sing in the glow of... ♪

MAN: And if you would assure Mr Tseow

that we are mindful of his concerns

regarding the timing of the agreement

and flexible as to its implementation.

(MAN ON TELEPHONE SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

(MAN 2 ON TELEPHONE SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

INTERPRETER: Very good.

And that we look forward to meeting him in person.

INTERPRETER: What date is this meeting?

Oh, the date? The date is the...

The date is the, um... have it here!

It's the 8th of the 8th, so a very auspicious date for...

..with the... the 8 is, um...

Is that date OK?

(INTERPRETER SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

(MR TSEOW SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

INTERPRETER: He says yes.

(MUTTERS) He said more than that, didn't he?

OK. Well, we look... Thank you for your time.

-Thank you. -BOTH: Thank you.

Wow. That was hard work. What have we got next?

-Canberra. -Nice to speak to someone in English.

-Yes, it will. -Will that be all?

Oh, yes! Thank you. Sorry.

I'm onto it. Hugh?

OK, we need to really fast-track

that memorandum of understanding for the Chinese.

Jim. Sorry, he's just on some conference calls.

-Did you want me to grab him? -No, no, no.

It looks serious. I just wanted to...run something past you.

-What do you reckon? -Wow.

-Is that the development? -Come up a treat, hasn't it?

-It sure has! -Yeah.

Just one little hiccup. Or bit of a blip.

-A hiccup or a blip? -Hugh.

More of a mix-up.

Just inside the front cover,

first paragraph down.

"This integrated urban environment

"will boast leisure precincts,

"parklands and dynamic open spaces

"in addition to its very own community gardens."

-Stop. -I have.

That's the bit. 'Community gardens'.

-That was never in our draft. -(LAUGHS) I know!

Then how did it get there?

I guess someone upstairs was trying to pump things up,

got a little carried away.

Well, let's just delete it.

-This has not been released? -Not to everyone.

Is that the blip?

I mean, there's 10 different gallery levels...

Have you got a spare charger?

-I can get you mine. -Not for a laptop, for a phone.

-Actually, can I... -No, hang on.

-Can I call you back? -I think I've got it.

-When do you board? -All good.

I'll call you in two minutes. Sorry about this. Sorry.

-Is something wrong? -Just received this.

OK, I know what you're gonna say.

There's sensitivities involved - we're Nation Building Australia

and we've got a huge Chinese investment.

-Is that with the Chinese? -Shanghai Syndicate.

Tseow Holdings.

-Hmm. Didn't see that. -What are you worried about?

-Have you looked at it? -I negotiated it.

-Closely. -(SIGHS) What have we missed?

No, you're not seeing the wood for the trees, Tony. The logo.

What about it?

You got a $4 billion public-private investment deal

and you're gonna use that logo?

-(SNORTS) Don't think so. -Sorry, what's the wood?

Actually, what's the trees?

-Jim! -It slipped through the net.

This is what the drafting process is for.

You add stuff, we add stuff. You look at ours, we look at yours.

We run it past the developer, we all agree,

and then it gets released.

-You're saying we missed a step? -You added a community garden!

It's a couple of swings and a seesaw.

That's a community playground.

Then what's a community garden?

They're like big vegetable patches.

What for?

So people can grow their own produce.

Why would you do that?

It's supposed to foster

a sense of neighbourhood, social cohesion.

That rings a bell, social... What was it again?

Cohesion.

-That's the phrase the interviewer used! -What?

When he was talking to the Planning Minister

about it on the radio.

-The radio? -Radio National.

But the response was amazing.

Inbox full, people applauding us.

Wanted to get involved.

And Stephanie Alexander - two missed calls.

I don't think there's a place for a community garden.

There must be somewhere

we can squeeze in a couple of tomato plants.

(SIGHS) Maybe I...

I tell you what - I'll leave it with you.

I can't even bring myself to look at it.

Rhonda, I just hung up on a federal minister.

Good, because we need to get on top of this.

We're nation-builders. For God's sake!

It looks like we're still building the Snowy.

-What's wrong with it? -Everything!

The font, the colours. Tell me one thing it does well.

-It says who we are. -Disagree.

-It doesn't speak to me. -It's a logo.

I deal with a lot of departments,

and this is the sort of thing everyone's getting right,

whereas I look at this, and what do I hear?

Nothing.

-What do you want it to say? -"Hey, you!"

"Get excited, get ready,

"because Australia's being built!"

OK, well, I'll take that...

"So get out of the way, because the future's now. Bang!"

-OK. You done? -Bang.

OK, well, I'll make a note to think about it.

-No, we need to jump on this. -Yep. Sure. Definitely.

-Yes? -That minister phoned back.

Oh, great. What line is she on?

No, I told her you were busy. And I didn't quite get her name.

-I know her name. -Phew! (LAUGHS)

-Can you get her back online? -She would have boarded by now.

HUGH: We could put it here.

-That's a roundabout. -Sorry, I just saw green.

-In front of the apartments? -No, that's the promenade.

What about behind?

I think that puts it in the shade.

-So? -What would you grow?

Mushrooms?

What about here?

Uh, that is a car park.

Put the car park underground and the gardens on top.

-It's a little expensive. -Then put the gardens underground.

-In order to grow what? -Mushrooms.

-Can we forget about mushrooms? -Truffles.

-What about here? -What is it?

-It's green. -It's not a roundabout.

-Thanks for joining us... -Joining us now with details..

MAN: The gardens are offering local residents...

WOMAN: It's a vibrant community garden.

WOMAN 2: ..a community garden project that's different...

WOMAN 3: ..gardening's a bit old-fashioned...

-Privileged to be part of it. -The backyard of the future.

MAN 2: We need the rain, true,

but you need to keep the topsoil, don't you?

Yeah. No, that was loud and clear.

Yes, no, that was loud and clear as well.

Sorry, if I could just... Hello? Hello?

How's it going?

-Uh, good. Yeah, just spoke to Garry Bennett. -Oh, great.

-The property developer for the Woolarong... -I know who he is.

And I told him about the community garden.

Yep. What did he say?

Want it with or without the swearwords?

Without.

Uh, point one.

"It's the dumbest beeping idea I've ever heard."

Two. "Tell her she's beeping crazy." I think that's you.

"Listen, you beeping redheaded twerp" - I think that's me -

"why would people buying luxury beeping penthouses

"want to grow a beeping lettuce?"

And then he became really angry.

Right.

-Karnsten? -Karsten!

-Karnsten. -Karsten.

Oh, sorry. We did meet before, didn't we?

Karlsten's here. Yep.

-Tony? -Yep?

Karnsten's here for Rhonda's logo meeting.

Oh, no. Can Scotty do it? I'm not in.

-But you are. -But he doesn't know that.

Um, he does.

I should check these things, shouldn't I?

-Yeah. Let's make this really quick. -Gotcha.

Actually, if I'm not back in 10, come and get me.

What do I say?

Say there's an urgent phone call, something like that.

OK, got it. Gotcha.

Oh, and that minister from the other day rang back.

Why didn't you come and tell me?

You were in a meeting with Scotty. I got her name.

I know her name! In future, come and tell me.

Right. But check if you're in first.

-Karsten. -Tony!

-Welcome back. -Scotty.

-All done? -How good are these?

Tony, I know how you like to get these things really moving,

so I've got them all set up and ready to go.

So this should not take more than an hour or two.

Right, I'll stop you there. I like that one.

-I don't. -I do. -None of these are ours.

-Sorry? -They're copyrighted. -Can't we change it a little?

I think that's a bit dangerous.

Mmm, sounds dangerous. We're trying to make a decision.

-Are those ours? -I will get to these.

-I like that one. -Tony, if you wanna take a seat.

Yeah, it speaks to me. It says all the things I need to hear.

-"Bam! Hey, you!" -No, I'm not hearing that.

Quick decision?

OK, well, just take a seat and we'll...

Alright. If I get called away, that one.

You fucking idiots.

It was added by someone in another office.

-Bit of a blip. -This is no blip.

-Then it's a hiccup. -What were they thinking?

They were hoping a small garden might add a village feel.

-Village?! -Sort of an added feature.

Have you seen our apartments?

Do they look like they wanna be growing tomatoes?

Uh, lemons, maybe? Or limes, for the cocktails?

-Modern, elegant, inner-urban chic. -Yeah.

And you wanna put a compost heap in the middle.

Or round the back, depending on shade.

-You're fucking kidding me. -It wouldn't have to be large.

-Inner-urban chic. -Gotcha.

-Good. -But if we found the right location...

Listen, the only vegetables

I wanna see within a half-mile of my apartments

are gonna be sitting on the shelf of the IGA, got it?

You clueless work-experience clowns.

I think that was point four.

Whereas this one really speaks to the future.

You know, elements of building and construction.

It's very...it's very bold.

-Um, Tony? -Yes?

I was just saying that this one speaks to the future.

Yeah, I hear that. But they're all so good.

Maybe we should just go through them one more time.

-KARSTEN: Good idea. -Tony, sorry to interrupt.

-Phone call for you. -Oh, OK. Is it urgent?

Yes, yes. It's urgent.

-Who is it? -Um...

-That company? -Why don't I speak to them?

No, no, I'd better speak to them.

-Which company was it? -Um...

-But it's urgent? -Yes!

Why don't you take it in here, then?

-Great idea, Karsten. -It's absolutely fine.

I will wait outside. It sounds important. I'll wait outside.

L'extérieur.

I should have thought of a name, shouldn't I?

Oh, is this related to the... Ooh! You fooled me!

Can he see me?

-Yep. -OK.

Let's finish this meeting asap.

And, Scotty, you ride shotgun on it.

This organisation is on the verge of an investment coup

and we're currently redesigning logos!

Are you speaking to me or the person on the phone?

-Person on the phone is fake! -Ah, fooled me again!

-I need you to keep a lid on this bullshit. -Got it.

OK, let's get him back in, knock this on the head.

-I'm on a plane in three hours. -Oh, yeah? On a plane.

-No, a real one. -Got me again.

MAN: These gardens are a great way for residents to meet...

WOMAN 2: About time developers thought about the community.

WOMAN 3: It's like that Jamie Oliver thing where you teach..

MAN 2: Everyone should have their own garden,

even if you live in an apartment.

-It's good for everyone. -Put people ahead of profit.

-What's that? -For you.

From Gardens Australia.

"Enjoy this selection of produce

"from one of our very own community gardens."

I just think we might have gone in a little half-cocked.

We announce half-cocked ideas all the time!

-Is this a carrot? -Uh, I think so.

-Why is it purple? -It might be organic.

-Jim. -What's the problem?

Uh, where to put it.

-What about here? -That's a roundabout.

-What about here? -It's a bit small.

It doesn't have to be big.

-We could use baby carrots, micro herbs. -Jim.

Even those little bonsai cucumbers. Problem solved.

-There is another problem. -What's that?

The developer's refusing to have it anywhere near his apartments.

Is that what he said?

His actual words were "If you bleeping well

"try and put a bleeping garden..."

-That's fine, Hugh. -Alright, what about over here?

-That's a Costco. -There? -Jim, please stop pointing.

-What's here? -Unplanned zone.

-Let's plan it. -It's years down the track.

We don't even know what's going there.

-A community garden. -For what community?

-This one. -That's 3km away. -So?

The whole idea of a community garden

is that it's near the community.

They can get a shuttle bus. A community shuttle bus!

Jim, it won't work.

Well, I was saving this.

But Jamie Oliver's people - they wanna talk.

-Oh, wow. -This thing's away.

-What about there? -That's water. -Oh.

TONY: Sorry, Katie, am I gonna have lunch with them as well?

No, but Mr Tseow and his assistant,

Mr Tsiong, of the syndicate, will drop by here.

-After the lunch. -Yes.

And will there be a translator?

'Cause last time, we stood around nodding and smiling.

-It was kind of awkward. -There'll be a translator.

-OK, fine. I'm going in now. -Got it.

-Now, Karsten! Congratulations. -Ah, Tony.

Thank you. Thank you. Wait, you haven't seen it yet.

-Yeah, but it's done? -Oh, yes, yes. Ready to go.

Special thanks have to go to Scotty,

who has been a great source of assistance.

-Where is Scotty? -Gone to get more mood boards.

No, let's get this over with. Let's knock it on the head.

Alright, well...

Before I reveal anything,

we didn't wanna get too far away from the original logo.

No - wanted to make it more of an evolution.

Exactly, but I hope you agree

that all the elements are still very much here.

I'll keep that in mind. But let's...

-Tony? -Yes.

Allied International Proprietary Limited are on the phone.

-Yes, but I'll speak to them in five minutes. -It's urgent.

Yes, but in five minutes, I'll speak to them.

No time. It's really urgent.

I'll quickly speak to them.

No-one leave.

Allied International.

Why would you wanna put it here?

It's not locked in.

We're just scoping out some general possibilities.

-A community garden? -Yes.

-Here? -Yes!

But for what community?

Uh, the Woolarong Urban Development.

-Way over there? -There might be a shuttle bus.

But, surely, if you're gonna...

Yeah, we just need to know the sort of potential problems

that one might encounter if we were to choose here.

-Here? -Yes, Marni!

Sorry. I just need an overview.

-You got a pen? -Yes.

Sorry about that, Karsten. All good.

-That's alright. Take a seat. -No, not this time. Reveal away.

-Scotty's not back yet. -Yep. Let's go.

Will Allied International call back?

-Let's go. -OK.

-Bravo, maestro. -Merci.

-Where's our name? -Didn't need it.

-On a logo? -Uh-uh.

-Not when you've got something that strong. -Thank you.

I thought the whole point was to tell people who we are.

Tell him, Karsten.

The more you write,

the more words and letters that you use,

the less you actually say.

This way, the logo does all the talking.

OK. And what is it saying at the moment?

Listen to it. Yeah?

Might need someone to speak on its behalf.

I'm gonna play you the soundscape.

What?

-(ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYS) -It's saying...

One idea - nation-building -

through a prism - your organisation -

endless possibilities.

Bam! I hear that. Loud and clear.

Yeah, but at least have our letters - NBA.

Aha!

N...B...A.

But I don't want people playing 'Where's Wally?' with...

Could we just have the soundscape off...

Actually, Karsten, can you just give us five minutes alone here?

-Can do. -Allied International...

Tell them to stop calling, please.

OK? Thank you.

HUGH: Sorry, was that problem three or four?

Uh, four.

OK, so your gardens are in. Who's gonna run 'em?

-Five. -The residents?

The residents live in another postcode.

-Who's gonna manage the place? -Six.

-A manager? -You need a committee.

You need constitution, governance, rules.

-Sorry, slow down. Seven. -So your garden's in.

What are you gonna do about security?

I'll make this Part B.

-Sorry? -How are you gonna protect it?

-Scarecrow? -From people.

You know, pinching crops, dumping rubbish, vandals.

You need fencing, 24-hour lighting.

We're running a garden, not a witness protection scheme.

Just letting you know the problems.

-And it's been very helpful. -I'm not finished.

Do you understand how a prism works?

Rhonda, I do. I just don't like the logo.

-What don't you like about it? -Everything.

The cost, the hassle, the prismy thing.

Look, I've let you had your play.

I don't think it should be our logo.

-(SCOFFS) It's a bit late to say that now. -What?

Karsten's logo's short-listed for a National Design Award.

How?! He only just unveiled it.

Submitted a couple of weeks ago, got the good news this morning.

-It's very exciting. -What's it got to do with us?

Just the sort of heat we need. There's a buzz now.

People wanna learn "Who are the prism people?

"The people in the prism - who are they?"

They certainly won't learn that from the logo, Rhonda!

Really? People in the prism, ideas come out.

We've finally got something that's speaking

and you wanna go back to the old logo.

It's not the old logo, it's the current logo! It's on the wall!

I don't understand you. I do not understand.

You know what? Have your logo.

Rebrand everything. I don't care.

I've got a huge deal I'm trying...

As long as this is the last I have to deal with it, fine.

-Fine. -Fine.

OK - say we resolve

all the issues you've mentioned.

Where you gonna park the shuttle bus?

We'll find a place. Assume it's resolved.

But after all that, is there anything

to stop us from putting a garden here?

-Guess not. -Good.

Once you've tested the soil.

"Soil testing."

Amy, it's Tony.

-Hello, Tony. -My swipe card's not working.

-Where are you? -Here. At the door.

Oh! Oh, I'll let you in.

TONY: Thank you.

I don't know what's wrong with it.

-We're getting new swipe cards. -Why?

So they have the new logo on them.

That is a tail wagging a dog.

-I thought it was a triangle with a fan. -No.

-(POWER TOOL BUZZES) -What the hell's going on?

They'll only be here a few days.

I knew this would happen. When do we get the new swipe cards?

-As soon as you get your photo taken. -(GROANS)

You need two passport-size photos

looking straight ahead, not smiling.

TONY: I won't be.

Preliminary soil report.

And...good news?

-No. -You're smiling.

Am I? I shouldn't be.

-TONY: Katie! -KATIE: Yeah?

I can't retrieve my emails. Is your email down?

-Yes, it is. -Do you know why?

-Yes. -Why?

We're offline for a few hours while they update the website.

-What's wrong with it? -Nothing.

-Then why are we updating it? -'Cause it's got the old logo.

Oh, did you ring the Foreign Minister's chief of staff back?

-No. When did he ring? -I emailed you.

-Emails are down! -(LAUGHS) Oh, yeah.

When you get it, make sure you call,

'cause I marked it 'urgent'.

-I'll call him now. -Oh, you need the number!

-Yes! -Yes. OK. Uh...

It's on one of these.

WOMAN: Zinc, mercury, magnesium...

HUGH: Yeah, I think there used to be a factory there.

What did they make, multivitamins?

No, I think it was batteries.

-What's 'Pb'? -That'd be lead.

-Oh, is it? What's 'Cd'? -Uh, cadmium.

-Oh, thank you. -Yes, thank you.

-This can't be right. -It's from the lab.

So, basically, we can't grow vegetables in that soil.

You can. You just can't eat them.

But that's the whole idea, to eat them.

Then you have to dig up the soil.

Can you imagine how expensive that would be?

-Yeah. -Hugh, you're smiling again.

Am I? I shouldn't be.

Thank you. What's that smell?

Oh, um...the paint.

-Where is everyone? -Downstairs until they finish here.

I've got the Chinese coming in half an hour!

And you've got that meeting with Mr Tseow.

That's the Chinese, Amy.

-It's the same meeting. -Oh, that explains so much!

I need these new documents

formatted and printed before they arrive.

-Shall I take them downstairs? -No, print them here.

-We can't. -I thought we were back online.

We are, but the printer needs to be reconfigured.

-What? -Because of the new logo.

When the rainbow comes out of the house,

it can't deal with all the colours.

It's actually an idea going through a prism and then...

-Oh, that's clever. -Amy!

-Go downstairs? -Yes, please.

Have you got your passport photos?

-I'll get them. -Apparently you can smile now.

Not gonna happen, Amy.

(KNOCK AT DOOR)

Hang on. Hang on.

-Excuse me! Mate! -Yeah?

Someone at your door.

Oh, shit, they're early.

I just...

-Welcome. -(MAN INTERPRETS)

The... It's...

(ALARM BLARES)

Sorry. I just... It's an alarm that...

It's a... I'll try and turn it off.

Once again, my sincerest apologies

for that mix-up earlier

with the smell and the noise and...

(SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

(SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

He wishes to know the significance of your sign.

-Oh, the logo? -Logo?

Oh, yes, logo.

He wants to know why there is

an explosion coming out of the teepee

and is it a cannonball?

Oh, no, it's an idea going through a prism - that's us -

and breaking into many possibilities.

Ah. (TRANSLATES)

Oh. (SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

Uh, he says that he prefers the old one.

(LAUGHS) You know what? I agree with him.

Anyway, a very productive meeting,

and we'll keep you up to date as the project firms up.

(TRANSLATES)

-(SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE) -TONY: Ah.

He says thank you

and he has been honoured to have had your time.

Oh, very kind. Scotty, have you got some of my cards?

Um, still waiting on the printers with the new logo.

-OK. Some of the old cards? -Thrown out.

-Grab the Post-it notes? -Yes.

-Just 'Tony'. Number. -'Tony'.

-Are you 6-1... -1-6.

Thank you.

Very honoured.

-We'd have to excavate the entire site. -Done.

-Then dispose of the contaminated soil. -Done.

Jim, have you thought of the cost?

Have you thought of the blowback if we stop?

All of that interest, all of those retweets -

it'll just take one photo

of Stephanie Alexander looking sullen

and the tweet tide will turn.

And you can forget about Jamie Oliver visiting.

-Is Jamie Oliver visiting? -Teaming up with local youth.

Gonna make a TV show where they open a cafe

using only inner-city produce.

Well, that's the other problem - even with site remediation,

we can't guarantee anything will be safe for human consumption.

They could end up having lead poisoning.

-That takes years to show up. -Jim.

It's an 8-week series. Jamie Oliver!

-OK, here's one possibility. -Yes.

Don't tweet. You haven't heard it.

-Just a draft. -Mm.

-(JIM PUTS PHONE DOWN) -We build the gardens. No.

-Draft? -But... No.

In stages. First stage - soil testing.

-Haven't we already done that? -We need time.

-Oh, yes. -More testing.

Followed by a scoping study,

maybe more testing.

OK, and how long do you think all this might take?

How long do you want?

Couple of years.

But we still say the garden's going in.

Absolutely. I mean, we're just trying to get it right.

But there could be some issues down the track.

There's definitely going to be some issues.

-A few blips. -I can say we're going ahead?

There are some big names here.

-Go for it. -Great.

Slow-food movement will be happy.

Couldn't get any slower!

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

-Morning, Amy. -Morning.

I'm actually warming to it.

-Mmm! All done. -Ah!

And it works downstairs as well.

Great. That's great. Well done.

Oh, and Katie wanted to see you first thing.

Ah! Beauty.

-More good news? -Yeah. -Are they the cards? -Yep.

Oh, they don't look that bad, actually.

They're embossed - it was a little more expensive,

but Rhonda felt it reflected us.

Something about the trees and wood.

Can you send a couple to Mr Tseow and his interpreter

when we get the memorandums of understanding done?

We need to get them done as soon as possible.

-We've been asked to hold off on that. -Can't do that.

-Just for a day or two. -Who asked? -Amy. -Amy?

Well, not Amy. The legal department called...

-What legal department? -Ours.

-They just need to check something. -What?

Something about it being too close to another logo.

Oh, you're kidding me.

Do you know a band named Pink Floyd?

(MUTTERS) Yes.

They had an album, 'Dark Side of the...Prism'?

(MUTTERS) Yep.

Is THAT something to do with the trees and the wood?

I'll send the proper cards through

when we get the teepee with the cann...the explos...

..on the prism on the...

When the new cards come through, we'll send them.

(TRANSLATES)

-Are we still locked in? -Yes.

-OK. Where are the painters? -They went to lunch.

OK.

Would you like a Post-it note?

Oh, please. Please.

'Tony'. Same again. 'Tony'.

-1-6. -1-6.

Would you like email?

No, just the call, I think, will be better.

Thank you.

And, sir, in the back. One for you?

-Sorry, 1-6. -1-6.

If you're calling from China,

you gotta...

-+61, drop the 0. -Oh.

-Yeah, I'll fix that. -Sorry about that. I'll take it.

That's...that's the updated card.

(SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

And it's free after 9:00 too.

(SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE)

Or use Viber, if you're on Viber.

(SPEAKS CHINESE LANGUAGE) Viber. Viber.