subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for The Girl Next Door-English

Afrikaans

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bengali

Bosnian

Bulgarian

Catalan

Cebuano

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian Download

Czech

Danish

Dutch

English

Esperanto

Estonian

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi Download

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Khmer

Korean

Kurdish (Kurmanji)

Kyrgyz

Lao

Latin

Latvian

Lithuanian

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam Download

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Nepali

Norwegian

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese

Punjabi

Romanian

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Sesotho

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhala

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Telugu

Thai

Turkish

Ukrainian

Urdu Download

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Odia (Oriya)

Kinyarwanda

Turkmen

Tatar

Uyghur

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:40,006 --> 00:00:42,406 How do you want me? 2 00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:46,972 Oh, that's good. Yeah, just... Just get comfortable. 3 00:00:49,983 --> 00:00:51,814 I'm a little nervous. 4 00:00:52,018 --> 00:00:53,576 You're doing great. 5 00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:59,288 A little to the right there, gorgeous. 6 00:00:59,492 --> 00:01:02,859 - Okay. Like this? - Oh, that a girl. 7 00:01:08,168 --> 00:01:10,636 Yeah. Okay. 8 00:01:10,837 --> 00:01:12,862 - You ready? - Yeah. 9 00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:15,541 - You're blushing, Dorothy. - Don't blush, Kathy. 10 00:01:15,775 --> 00:01:17,504 Oh, Kathy. 11 00:01:18,511 --> 00:01:21,002 Okay, and big smile. 12 00:01:21,781 --> 00:01:23,112 Kathy Regan. 13 00:01:23,316 --> 00:01:25,045 I will always remember... 14 00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:27,113 ...the game against Fairfield. 15 00:01:27,320 --> 00:01:29,185 That one final kick. 16 00:01:29,389 --> 00:01:31,983 State champion, senior year. 17 00:01:32,392 --> 00:01:34,019 Hunter McCaffrey. 18 00:01:34,427 --> 00:01:35,985 I will always remember... 19 00:01:36,196 --> 00:01:38,960 ...all the great times with the dirty dozen... 20 00:01:39,165 --> 00:01:41,395 ...and macking all the honeys. 21 00:01:42,535 --> 00:01:44,366 Cindy K. Tina B. 22 00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:46,698 Michelle H. Goddamn! 23 00:01:46,906 --> 00:01:48,396 Just too many to remember. 24 00:01:49,542 --> 00:01:53,137 I'll always remember lacrosse champions. 25 00:01:54,180 --> 00:01:56,375 All the glory days with the boys. 26 00:01:56,583 --> 00:01:57,914 I will always remember... 27 00:01:58,618 --> 00:02:00,415 ...the math-club madmen... 28 00:02:01,621 --> 00:02:03,589 ...making the perfect fake ID's... 29 00:02:04,090 --> 00:02:06,320 ...which lasted six seconds 30 00:02:07,727 --> 00:02:10,195 - Troy Cochran. - Troy Cochran. 31 00:02:10,396 --> 00:02:11,886 - Troy gives good head. - Fuck you! 32 00:02:12,265 --> 00:02:13,755 I'll always remember... 33 00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:15,559 Seniors! 34 00:02:15,835 --> 00:02:17,996 ...the senior prank. 35 00:03:23,269 --> 00:03:26,727 Matthew Kidman. I will always remember... 36 00:03:33,479 --> 00:03:35,344 YEARBOOK MEMORIES FORM SENIORS ONLY! 37 00:03:35,548 --> 00:03:37,982 NAME: MATTHEW KIDMAN I'll always remember... 38 00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:50,495 Yeah, well, I told you I wanted to try out. 39 00:03:54,300 --> 00:03:56,427 We'd like to honor a student... 40 00:03:56,536 --> 00:03:59,835 ...who has shown outstanding leadership. 41 00:04:00,940 --> 00:04:02,703 We have no doubt that he will be one... 42 00:04:02,809 --> 00:04:04,538 ...of the great politicians in Washington. 43 00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:06,041 Georgetown UNIVERSITY 44 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:09,875 The award for the brightest leader... 45 00:04:09,983 --> 00:04:11,974 ...of tomorrow, Matthew Kidman. 46 00:04:14,754 --> 00:04:17,018 - I'm in! I'm in! - Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 47 00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:19,916 Georgetown! They gave it to you! 48 00:04:58,097 --> 00:04:59,724 Hey, Jenny. 49 00:05:01,901 --> 00:05:04,096 Yeah, dude, come on. 50 00:05:14,647 --> 00:05:17,115 SENIOR PROM DO YOU HAVE THE FEVER?! 51 00:05:18,751 --> 00:05:21,379 - Do you have the fever? - No. 52 00:05:22,288 --> 00:05:24,085 Why? Do you? 53 00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:26,782 I don't know. Maybe. 54 00:05:27,627 --> 00:05:29,254 How about you? 55 00:05:29,629 --> 00:05:31,563 I just gotta fuck something. 56 00:05:31,764 --> 00:05:34,358 I said, everybody say, "Ho!" 57 00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:41,538 You know what I say? 58 00:05:41,741 --> 00:05:45,643 I say, this prom is gonna be off the hook! Do you feel me? 59 00:05:51,918 --> 00:05:54,614 Security's gonna be tight. Get wasted before you show up. 60 00:05:56,055 --> 00:05:57,750 That's enough! 61 00:05:57,990 --> 00:06:00,458 That's enough. I can wait. 62 00:06:00,660 --> 00:06:03,254 I can wait, people. 63 00:06:04,497 --> 00:06:07,364 Now, it is your student-council president... 64 00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:09,935 ...who has a few announcements to make. 65 00:06:12,071 --> 00:06:13,436 Thanks, Mr. Salinger. 66 00:06:18,344 --> 00:06:20,608 All right, how you doing? 67 00:06:22,615 --> 00:06:25,516 Okay, let's start off with Operation Get Samnang. 68 00:06:25,718 --> 00:06:27,777 Sam Young, baby! 69 00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:30,185 Yeah. 70 00:06:31,124 --> 00:06:35,083 Well, we did it. We raised the 25,000 dollars... 71 00:06:35,294 --> 00:06:38,422 ...so now we can bring the genius Samnang out of Cambodia... 72 00:06:38,631 --> 00:06:40,599 ...and bring him here to study at Westport. 73 00:06:43,202 --> 00:06:47,036 Speaking of which, Samnang sent us a new tape. 74 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:49,071 Show that shit! 75 00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,609 Show it! 76 00:06:53,179 --> 00:06:55,841 Hi, everyone, it's Samnang. 77 00:06:57,817 --> 00:06:59,648 Sam Young! 78 00:06:59,852 --> 00:07:03,652 I am very excited to be coming soon. Are you excited? 79 00:07:08,194 --> 00:07:11,721 I told my class that I am coming to America. They were sad. 80 00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:13,364 I am so happy. 81 00:07:13,566 --> 00:07:16,000 - I wanna bang you! - Go, Cougars! 82 00:07:31,217 --> 00:07:33,845 How do they just skip class every day and go to the beach? 83 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,251 Because they just don't care. 84 00:07:47,733 --> 00:07:49,132 Let's go with them. 85 00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:52,934 - Seriously, let's just do it. - Why? 86 00:07:53,372 --> 00:07:55,840 Because, I mean, we never do anything. 87 00:07:56,042 --> 00:07:59,011 I mean, we're graduating. We should be going nuts right now. 88 00:07:59,212 --> 00:08:00,543 Let's just do something. 89 00:08:00,746 --> 00:08:02,771 I am doing something, I'm going to class. 90 00:08:03,182 --> 00:08:05,173 Klitz, you already got into Yale. 91 00:08:05,284 --> 00:08:06,842 I mean, it doesn't matter anymore. 92 00:08:07,053 --> 00:08:08,520 Yeah, Klitz, you pussy. 93 00:08:08,721 --> 00:08:11,519 - Well, why don't you go? - Yeah, come on. Let's go. 94 00:08:11,724 --> 00:08:13,624 Beach is for fags, man. 95 00:08:13,826 --> 00:08:16,386 - The beach is for fags? - Yeah. 96 00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:20,464 You know what? You guys are fags. 97 00:08:25,204 --> 00:08:26,466 Everyone to the beach! 98 00:08:28,407 --> 00:08:30,898 Let's go! Lock them and load them, dude. 99 00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:33,542 WESTPORT HIGH SCHOOL 100 00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:36,805 Fuck it. 101 00:08:55,735 --> 00:08:57,396 SCHOOL SECURITY 102 00:08:57,603 --> 00:09:00,333 Personal power means the ability to act... 103 00:09:00,439 --> 00:09:03,135 ...the ability to take action. 104 00:09:03,342 --> 00:09:05,242 STOP CHECK-OUT WITH SECURITY 105 00:09:05,444 --> 00:09:08,072 Three steps to personal power are necessary for results. 106 00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:09,839 Here's number one step to personal power. 107 00:09:09,949 --> 00:09:12,509 It's called energy. Energy. 108 00:09:12,752 --> 00:09:15,516 When you wake up feeling really lethargic, really lousy... 109 00:09:15,755 --> 00:09:17,985 ...do you usually jump up and go...? 110 00:09:27,199 --> 00:09:28,496 Oh, shit. 111 00:09:48,988 --> 00:09:51,388 Hey! Pull it over! 112 00:09:53,092 --> 00:09:55,026 Pull it over! Pull... 113 00:10:26,058 --> 00:10:27,582 Oh, well, you're home early. 114 00:10:27,827 --> 00:10:30,057 I postponed yearbook. I gotta work on my speech 115 00:10:30,262 --> 00:10:32,594 - Hi, Mr. Peterson. - Mr. President. 116 00:10:32,832 --> 00:10:34,732 - Mrs. Peterson. - Congratulations. 117 00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:37,835 - Oh, thank you. - Congratulations. Georgetown. 118 00:10:38,037 --> 00:10:40,870 Wow, you must be flying. 119 00:10:41,073 --> 00:10:41,937 It's cool. 120 00:10:42,041 --> 00:10:43,440 What's the speech you're working on? 121 00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:46,441 Oh, it's for this scholarship I need to get so I can... 122 00:10:46,545 --> 00:10:48,672 ...actually go to Georgetown. 123 00:10:48,881 --> 00:10:50,405 It's pretty expensive. 124 00:10:50,616 --> 00:10:52,607 What kind of scholarship is it? 125 00:10:52,607 --> 00:10:53,378 What do they give it for? 126 00:10:53,586 --> 00:10:58,182 It's for the student who best demonstrates moral fiber. 127 00:10:58,391 --> 00:11:00,256 Oh, moral fiber. Well, that's... 128 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,288 - Oh, I'm sure you'll get it. - Thanks. I mean, I hope so. 129 00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:04,895 I mean, there's some stiff Competition... 130 00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:07,431 ...and they only pick one of us... 131 00:11:07,633 --> 00:11:11,069 ...so I'll just have to blow them away with my speech. 132 00:11:14,306 --> 00:11:17,969 Okay, so why do I deserve this scholarship? 133 00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:20,145 1. MAKE EYE CONTACT 2. BE CHARMING 3. JFK! 134 00:11:20,379 --> 00:11:22,904 ...can do for you but what you can do..." 135 00:11:23,015 --> 00:11:25,609 John F. Kennedy once said, "Ask not what 136 00:12:00,486 --> 00:12:01,919 Look, I don't know who she is. 137 00:12:02,121 --> 00:12:05,284 I'm just saying that this girl was unbelievable. 138 00:12:05,491 --> 00:12:07,823 I mean, she was like this angel. 139 00:12:08,027 --> 00:12:11,622 I mean, she had this smile. I mean, you should have seen it. 140 00:12:11,831 --> 00:12:15,096 - So did you bang her? - Oh, yeah, yeah. I banged her. 141 00:12:15,301 --> 00:12:16,928 That's what a man does, okay? 142 00:12:17,136 --> 00:12:20,105 - Yeah. Okay, Eli. - Good. 143 00:12:23,509 --> 00:12:25,340 Oh, my God. She's so hot. 144 00:12:25,544 --> 00:12:28,445 - What channel, dude? - No, the girl next door. 145 00:12:28,647 --> 00:12:30,274 I can see her through my window. 146 00:12:30,483 --> 00:12:31,711 How's the rack? 147 00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:35,212 - God, who is this girl? - How's the rack? 148 00:12:35,454 --> 00:12:37,115 - Hold on. Relax. - No. You relax. 149 00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:39,314 Be a man and go over there. 150 00:12:39,525 --> 00:12:40,992 Okay. Say what? 151 00:12:41,193 --> 00:12:43,787 I don't know. Get off your ass and do something. Fuck! 152 00:12:48,834 --> 00:12:50,529 - Hey, what are you doing? - What? 153 00:12:50,736 --> 00:12:52,567 Hey, dude, seriously, I told you... 154 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:54,933 ...it really freaks me out when you watch that while... 155 00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:56,337 ...you're talking to me. 156 00:12:56,542 --> 00:12:58,840 Just learn to like it. 157 00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:06,844 Oh, my God. 158 00:13:07,052 --> 00:13:09,350 What? Matt, what? 159 00:13:09,555 --> 00:13:10,886 Matt! 160 00:13:17,062 --> 00:13:19,155 Dude, what the fuck?! 161 00:13:38,517 --> 00:13:39,916 Shit! 162 00:14:10,449 --> 00:14:12,610 - Yes? - I'm sorry. 163 00:14:14,286 --> 00:14:17,016 - Dan. - What's going on? 164 00:14:17,556 --> 00:14:18,250 Matthew! 165 00:14:19,291 --> 00:14:21,555 Matthew, come down here. 166 00:14:33,138 --> 00:14:35,629 - What are you doing up there? - Nothing. 167 00:14:35,841 --> 00:14:37,809 Come down here. 168 00:14:45,317 --> 00:14:46,614 This is Danielle. 169 00:14:46,819 --> 00:14:50,778 You know Mrs. Clark from next door. Danielle's her niece. 170 00:14:51,457 --> 00:14:53,857 Danielle just told us something very interesting. 171 00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:58,422 Mrs. Clark is in Africa for two weeks with her church group. 172 00:14:58,631 --> 00:14:59,928 Did you know that? 173 00:15:01,367 --> 00:15:03,835 Anyway, Danielle just came in from Los Angeles... 174 00:15:04,036 --> 00:15:06,834 ...and she's housesitting while her aunt's away. 175 00:15:07,039 --> 00:15:08,563 Why don't you show her around. 176 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,083 Such a long road, you know. 177 00:15:29,561 --> 00:15:32,792 - What are we doing? - Did you like what you saw? 178 00:15:33,132 --> 00:15:35,191 What are you talking about? 179 00:15:37,169 --> 00:15:40,468 Okay, I saw you for, like, an instant. 180 00:15:40,673 --> 00:15:42,163 - An instant? - Yeah. 181 00:15:42,374 --> 00:15:43,864 It was no big deal. 182 00:15:45,511 --> 00:15:50,210 No, no, it was... It was a big deal, but it's just that... 183 00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:52,213 I didn't... 184 00:15:55,054 --> 00:15:56,885 I'm sorry. 185 00:15:57,089 --> 00:15:58,681 I'm sorry. 186 00:16:00,225 --> 00:16:01,920 So, what are we gonna do about this? 187 00:16:03,729 --> 00:16:05,890 I mean, I said I was sorry. 188 00:16:10,102 --> 00:16:11,501 What? 189 00:16:11,704 --> 00:16:13,069 You saw me... 190 00:16:15,407 --> 00:16:17,739 Yeah, right, like I'm gonna strip right here? 191 00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:22,871 Are you serious? 192 00:16:26,085 --> 00:16:27,780 No. 193 00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:31,551 No. No, never gonna happen. 194 00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:36,557 The whole package. 195 00:16:36,762 --> 00:16:38,354 No, come on, this is good enough. 196 00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:43,265 Jesus! Come on, will you relax? 197 00:16:45,604 --> 00:16:47,265 Frigging psycho. 198 00:16:54,780 --> 00:16:57,044 There. You happy now? 199 00:17:02,287 --> 00:17:03,549 Yep. 200 00:17:05,491 --> 00:17:08,051 Hey! Wait! 201 00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:10,729 No! 202 00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:14,727 Jesus. Sorry. 203 00:17:23,442 --> 00:17:25,569 You're an asshole. It's not funny. 204 00:17:25,778 --> 00:17:27,746 It's a little funny. 205 00:17:30,749 --> 00:17:32,182 Come on. 206 00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:34,614 Let me in. Let me in. 207 00:17:46,398 --> 00:17:48,025 It's not funny. 208 00:17:48,267 --> 00:17:49,962 It's a little funny. 209 00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:04,249 So, what else do you do besides torture people? 210 00:18:06,351 --> 00:18:08,683 - Seriously, what's your story? - I don't know. 211 00:18:09,788 --> 00:18:11,483 I kind of just quit my job. 212 00:18:12,491 --> 00:18:15,324 I want to start over. Maybe go to college. 213 00:18:20,732 --> 00:18:25,465 So are you here alone or what? 214 00:18:25,671 --> 00:18:27,798 - What? - Just ask. 215 00:18:33,312 --> 00:18:36,543 Do you have a boyfriend? 216 00:18:37,449 --> 00:18:38,916 No. 217 00:18:41,253 --> 00:18:44,848 Aren't you gonna ask me if I have a girlfriend? 218 00:18:46,825 --> 00:18:48,087 No.01:18:45.04\01:18:46.13 Okay. 219 00:18:48,327 --> 00:18:51,387 So you're about to graduate. You must be going nuts right now. 220 00:18:53,198 --> 00:18:54,529 Yeah. 221 00:18:54,733 --> 00:18:58,999 I mean, it's just been off the hook, you know? 222 00:18:59,204 --> 00:19:00,831 - Really? - Yeah. 223 00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,338 So, what's the craziest thing you've done lately? 224 00:19:04,543 --> 00:19:07,034 Oh, I mean, it's hard to tell, you know, because we... 225 00:19:07,246 --> 00:19:09,806 I've just done so much nuts stuff. I mean... 226 00:19:10,349 --> 00:19:13,216 It's just off the hook, off the walls. I mean... 227 00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:16,012 You haven't done anything, have you? 228 00:19:17,256 --> 00:19:18,518 No. 229 00:19:19,458 --> 00:19:22,222 It's kind of... It's kind of been my problem lately. 230 00:19:22,427 --> 00:19:24,861 Come on, there's gotta be something. 231 00:19:25,664 --> 00:19:27,188 What about your girlfriend? 232 00:19:30,102 --> 00:19:31,364 Okay. 233 00:19:31,570 --> 00:19:34,562 We can figure this out. You just need a girl. 234 00:19:34,940 --> 00:19:36,908 What kind of girl? 235 00:19:38,410 --> 00:19:40,105 Definitely someone cute. 236 00:19:40,646 --> 00:19:42,375 Definitely. 237 00:19:43,315 --> 00:19:45,875 Someone who can make him laugh. 238 00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:50,584 But he also needs someone who's gonna push him. 239 00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:53,958 Someone who's gonna make him do... 240 00:19:54,059 --> 00:19:55,959 ...things he never thought he could do. 241 00:19:56,762 --> 00:19:59,663 Like stripping in the middle of the street? 242 00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:25,381 - Well, thanks for the ride. - No problem. 243 00:20:33,298 --> 00:20:35,095 Well... 244 00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:37,827 ...good night. 245 00:20:38,036 --> 00:20:39,435 Good night. 246 00:20:44,676 --> 00:20:45,665 "Good night"? What are you, gay? 247 00:20:47,846 --> 00:20:50,838 - I would have nailed her. - Ok, you wouldn't have nailed her. 248 00:20:51,049 --> 00:20:53,313 - Whatever, dude. - And, you know, secondly... 249 00:20:53,518 --> 00:20:56,214 ...you know, the vibe was not right. 250 00:20:56,455 --> 00:20:59,720 The vibe wasn't right? She comes to your house and makes you strip. 251 00:20:59,958 --> 00:21:02,449 What does she have to do, sit on your face? 252 00:21:03,462 --> 00:21:05,020 Come on, bitch. 253 00:21:05,731 --> 00:21:08,928 - Damn. Should have kissed her. - Are you okay? Dude? 254 00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,863 All right, you all have this graph, correct? 255 00:21:13,071 --> 00:21:15,471 Good. Let's move along then. 256 00:21:15,741 --> 00:21:17,402 Now, it's a very simple equation here. 257 00:21:17,509 --> 00:21:19,875 Somebody give me the answer to this. 258 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:25,147 All right, if no one knows the answer to this... 259 00:21:26,685 --> 00:21:29,552 Looking at this calculation, what does this make us think of? 260 00:21:34,726 --> 00:21:36,557 Questions on this? 261 00:22:03,088 --> 00:22:06,922 Good news, ladies and gentlemen. Pop-quiz time. 262 00:22:51,103 --> 00:22:54,231 That's Samnang Sok. He's this complete genius. 263 00:22:54,439 --> 00:22:56,430 So we raised all this money for him... 264 00:22:56,541 --> 00:22:58,600 ...to come here and study at our school. 265 00:22:58,810 --> 00:23:02,007 - Who's "we"? - Well, I mean, I did... 266 00:23:02,214 --> 00:23:04,739 ...but he could be the next Einstein, you know. 267 00:23:05,484 --> 00:23:07,475 You know, he could cure cancer. 268 00:23:15,894 --> 00:23:17,623 Let's go. 269 00:23:22,100 --> 00:23:24,193 So, what do you wanna do? 270 00:23:27,372 --> 00:23:28,634 What? 271 00:23:31,643 --> 00:23:33,008 I'm not stripping again. 272 00:23:33,979 --> 00:23:35,640 Come on. 273 00:23:50,028 --> 00:23:51,791 Danielle! 274 00:23:53,198 --> 00:23:54,722 Come on. Where are you going? 275 00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:10,614 Hey, come on, let's get out of here. 276 00:24:11,383 --> 00:24:13,578 How do you know no one's home? 277 00:24:13,785 --> 00:24:15,309 - I don't. - Come on. 278 00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:17,044 Seriously, this is nuts. 279 00:24:28,567 --> 00:24:30,000 Oh, boxers. 280 00:24:30,569 --> 00:24:35,006 I always wear boxers. You just caught me on a weird day. 281 00:24:46,785 --> 00:24:50,448 So, what's the craziest thing you've done lately? 282 00:24:53,592 --> 00:24:54,957 This is right up there. 283 00:25:07,973 --> 00:25:09,907 Oh, my God. 284 00:25:12,777 --> 00:25:14,574 - That's Mr. Salinger. - Who? 285 00:25:14,779 --> 00:25:16,713 That's my principal. Seriously, let's go. 286 00:25:18,517 --> 00:25:21,042 - It's not funny. - It's a little funny. 287 00:25:23,788 --> 00:25:25,551 Hey. 288 00:25:27,959 --> 00:25:29,984 Just go with it. 289 00:25:50,348 --> 00:25:53,283 Dude, I'm kind of uncomfortable watching this with you. 290 00:25:53,485 --> 00:25:55,919 Dude, learn to like it. 291 00:26:01,293 --> 00:26:02,920 I'm all wet. Can I come in? 292 00:26:09,834 --> 00:26:12,997 Hey, guys. This is Danielle. 293 00:26:13,204 --> 00:26:16,332 You must be Eli. And Klitz. Right. 294 00:26:16,541 --> 00:26:18,441 Hey, come on, we're all going out. 295 00:26:18,643 --> 00:26:23,307 - Can I use your bathroom first? - Oh, it's over here to the left. 296 00:26:29,421 --> 00:26:32,151 - Dude. - I know. 297 00:26:32,357 --> 00:26:34,120 Dude. 298 00:26:34,326 --> 00:26:35,691 I know. 299 00:26:51,209 --> 00:26:53,302 - Dude, what are we doing here? - Yeah, I know. 300 00:26:53,511 --> 00:26:54,910 Guys, seriously, it's gonna get... 301 00:26:55,013 --> 00:26:56,844 ...broken up, like, any second now, right? 302 00:26:58,717 --> 00:27:00,014 Guys? 303 00:27:12,631 --> 00:27:14,724 - Get the fuck out of here! - Sorry. 304 00:27:27,379 --> 00:27:29,006 Go. 305 00:27:29,848 --> 00:27:32,715 - So, what do you wanna do? - Let's just chill. 306 00:27:32,917 --> 00:27:34,680 Hi, guys. 307 00:27:36,721 --> 00:27:39,747 - Is this your party? - No, it's a friend of mine's. 308 00:27:40,158 --> 00:27:42,388 - I'm Hunter. - Danielle. 309 00:27:42,594 --> 00:27:44,391 This is Matthew. 310 00:27:44,596 --> 00:27:46,826 - Hey, Matt, what's up? - What's up? 311 00:27:47,499 --> 00:27:49,057 Can I get you something to drink? 312 00:27:49,634 --> 00:27:50,965 - Yeah. - Hey, man, what's up? 313 00:27:51,169 --> 00:27:52,966 - Can you come here for a second? - Yeah. 314 00:27:53,171 --> 00:27:55,230 No, it's cool. They're pals. 315 00:27:56,141 --> 00:27:57,403 What's up? 316 00:27:57,609 --> 00:28:00,271 Yeah, man, this party's getting kind of full, bro. 317 00:28:00,478 --> 00:28:03,811 - Yeah, so? - So you're gonna have to take off. 318 00:28:04,015 --> 00:28:06,415 - Really? - Yeah. 319 00:28:08,253 --> 00:28:11,086 Okay, but I'm with her. I mean... 320 00:28:11,289 --> 00:28:13,257 Oh, it's cool, dude. She's taken care of. 321 00:28:17,529 --> 00:28:19,292 There's the door. 322 00:28:43,788 --> 00:28:45,585 Yo, man! 323 00:28:45,790 --> 00:28:48,156 When's Samsung getting here? 324 00:28:48,359 --> 00:28:50,919 - Samnang. - Yeah! 325 00:28:51,696 --> 00:28:53,095 I love him. 326 00:28:53,298 --> 00:28:57,462 Dude, I'm gonna do that little guy when he gets here. 327 00:28:57,669 --> 00:28:59,432 Hard. 328 00:29:00,805 --> 00:29:03,035 Cool, dude. I'm sure he'll like that. 329 00:29:03,241 --> 00:29:05,471 Sam Young! 330 00:29:09,380 --> 00:29:10,972 Excuse me. 331 00:29:26,765 --> 00:29:29,632 - Dude. - I know. 332 00:30:08,573 --> 00:30:11,474 - What? - You're coming with me. Right now. 333 00:30:12,811 --> 00:30:15,371 Everybody out. Let's move. 334 00:30:19,417 --> 00:30:24,218 I said out, minions! Move! Move! Faster, you little maggots. 335 00:30:26,758 --> 00:30:29,750 - So how's everything going? - Fine. 336 00:30:29,961 --> 00:30:32,521 Is everything, you know, okay at home? 337 00:30:32,730 --> 00:30:34,527 All right, what? 338 00:30:35,099 --> 00:30:36,862 Perhaps you should have a seat. 339 00:30:37,068 --> 00:30:39,502 Perhaps you should bite me. 340 00:30:40,071 --> 00:30:41,766 Perhaps. 341 00:30:44,776 --> 00:30:46,266 Matthew... 342 00:30:46,477 --> 00:30:49,446 ...we live in a crazy, mixed-up world. 343 00:30:49,647 --> 00:30:53,014 Crazy, but, oh, so beautiful. 344 00:31:11,169 --> 00:31:13,228 Excellent, grasshopper. 345 00:31:13,438 --> 00:31:17,067 And now for the final task of your training. 346 00:31:21,379 --> 00:31:24,246 You're gonna need a harder piece of wood than that, cowboy. 347 00:31:25,650 --> 00:31:28,448 - That's not her. - Yeah, it is. 348 00:31:37,662 --> 00:31:40,256 - Oh, no. - Oh, yeah. 349 00:31:49,741 --> 00:31:52,642 Matt! Matt! Dude, you're missing the best part. 350 00:31:55,213 --> 00:31:56,874 Fuck! Fuck! 351 00:31:59,050 --> 00:32:00,677 Settle down, tiger. I know. I know. 352 00:32:00,885 --> 00:32:02,944 It's not funny. Seriously, get away from me. 353 00:32:03,154 --> 00:32:05,554 - Dude, don't mess this up. - Mess what up? 354 00:32:05,757 --> 00:32:07,384 Matt, she's a porn star, okay? 355 00:32:07,625 --> 00:32:10,389 Take her to a motel room and bang her like a beast. 356 00:32:10,628 --> 00:32:12,323 Eli, I like this girl. 357 00:32:12,530 --> 00:32:15,328 And you can still like her with your penis inside her. 358 00:32:15,934 --> 00:32:18,129 I'm telling you, you're gonna regret this. 359 00:32:18,336 --> 00:32:20,566 What would JFK do? You know he'd tap that ass. 360 00:32:20,772 --> 00:32:22,797 Eli, I'm never gonna see her again. 361 00:32:22,907 --> 00:32:24,135 Oh, you know what? Fine. 362 00:32:24,342 --> 00:32:25,741 - Fine. - Fine! 363 00:32:26,577 --> 00:32:27,737 Goddamn it, Matt. 364 00:32:27,845 --> 00:32:30,973 I swear to God, if you don't fuck her, I'll kill myself! 365 00:32:31,182 --> 00:32:37,052 Matt, please. Please, Matt. Fuck her for me. For me! 366 00:32:49,067 --> 00:32:51,501 - Oh, Marci, you're so funny. - Oh, thanks. 367 00:32:54,605 --> 00:32:57,199 - I just saw you naked. - What? 368 00:32:57,408 --> 00:32:59,899 Don't worry, honey, you were only 2 days old. 369 00:33:00,111 --> 00:33:02,204 - Let's see what else we have. - Why are you here? 370 00:33:02,413 --> 00:33:03,880 I just came here to say hi. 371 00:33:04,816 --> 00:33:06,443 Hi. 372 00:33:06,684 --> 00:33:08,174 Look at this one of him. 373 00:33:16,995 --> 00:33:18,519 Hey, buddy. 374 00:33:19,197 --> 00:33:22,064 - That one's the best. - It is. He looks so adorable. 375 00:33:22,266 --> 00:33:24,359 He looks really... Oh, that's such a good one. 376 00:33:24,569 --> 00:33:27,299 - Here you go, Danielle. - Oh, thanks. 377 00:33:35,113 --> 00:33:37,411 - Thattagirl. - This is a cute one. 378 00:33:37,615 --> 00:33:39,446 Oh, who's your daddy? 379 00:33:39,917 --> 00:33:43,148 So you were going to school in Los Angeles? 380 00:33:43,354 --> 00:33:46,118 For a while. But then I started working on other things. 381 00:33:46,324 --> 00:33:48,588 Oh, what kind of things? 382 00:33:50,762 --> 00:33:52,059 Let me show you. 383 00:34:01,339 --> 00:34:02,636 Jesus! 384 00:34:07,278 --> 00:34:09,610 - Are you okay? - Yeah, I don't know, I... 385 00:34:10,381 --> 00:34:11,973 I don't feel so good. 386 00:34:16,654 --> 00:34:19,145 What can I do to make you feel better? 387 00:34:34,172 --> 00:34:35,935 I think I'm feeling a lot better now. 388 00:34:36,174 --> 00:34:39,109 - We can go out another night. - No, we're going out tonight. 389 00:34:39,677 --> 00:34:42,009 - You sure? - Positive. 390 00:34:46,084 --> 00:34:48,814 - I don't know if I can do this. - Yes, you can. 391 00:34:49,020 --> 00:34:51,853 But tonight, be the man. 392 00:34:52,490 --> 00:34:55,516 First off, act like you don't even like her. 393 00:34:55,726 --> 00:34:58,320 - Hey. - Hey. 394 00:34:58,529 --> 00:35:03,159 Second, get her drunk. Really drunk, okay? 395 00:35:03,401 --> 00:35:05,961 That way the true porn star will come out in her. 396 00:35:09,340 --> 00:35:12,776 Here, I... I got us something. 397 00:35:15,813 --> 00:35:17,838 Bourbon? 398 00:35:18,049 --> 00:35:21,348 - Are you trying to get me drunk? - No, what? 399 00:35:21,552 --> 00:35:25,420 - I thought you like to rock. - "Like to rock?" 400 00:35:26,023 --> 00:35:28,583 Last and most important... 401 00:35:28,826 --> 00:35:31,056 ...always be touching her, Matt. 402 00:35:31,262 --> 00:35:33,856 That tells her you came here to get down tonight. 403 00:35:37,602 --> 00:35:39,661 What are we doing? 404 00:35:40,838 --> 00:35:42,738 Just chilling. 405 00:35:46,844 --> 00:35:48,744 Hey, look. 406 00:35:49,213 --> 00:35:50,510 MOTEL Glen Capri 407 00:35:53,384 --> 00:35:59,016 Maybe we should get a room. 408 00:36:00,057 --> 00:36:01,547 Okay. 409 00:36:08,566 --> 00:36:10,557 Here it is. 410 00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:32,455 This is... This is really nice. 411 00:36:32,823 --> 00:36:34,757 TV. 412 00:36:35,259 --> 00:36:36,658 Air conditioner. 413 00:36:37,528 --> 00:36:39,758 Got a little lamp there. 414 00:36:40,631 --> 00:36:42,724 Is that Monet? 415 00:36:46,704 --> 00:36:48,433 What? 416 00:36:48,906 --> 00:36:52,103 - What are you thinking? - What are you thinking? 417 00:36:55,146 --> 00:36:56,443 I don't know. 418 00:37:06,724 --> 00:37:08,316 Do you wanna fuck me? 419 00:37:15,933 --> 00:37:18,026 Come here. 420 00:37:35,353 --> 00:37:36,945 How do you want me? 421 00:37:38,689 --> 00:37:40,179 Why are you doing this? 422 00:37:41,392 --> 00:37:43,053 What? 423 00:37:43,694 --> 00:37:45,355 This. 424 00:37:47,198 --> 00:37:49,666 Isn't this what you want? 425 00:37:50,001 --> 00:37:53,027 To fuck a porn star in a cheap motel room? 426 00:37:58,042 --> 00:38:00,636 So this is what you think of me. 427 00:38:03,080 --> 00:38:05,048 - Danielle, wait. I'm sorry. - Let me guess. 428 00:38:05,249 --> 00:38:06,841 You saw a tape, and you thought: 429 00:38:07,051 --> 00:38:09,349 "What the hell? She does it for a living, right?" 430 00:38:09,553 --> 00:38:12,818 - Eli told me to do it. - Oh, now that's a mature response. 431 00:38:13,057 --> 00:38:16,220 - Why didn't you just tell me? - Because I didn't want to, okay? 432 00:38:19,263 --> 00:38:22,027 Because I loved the way you looked at me. 433 00:38:23,501 --> 00:38:26,868 God, do you have any idea how...? 434 00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:29,763 Forget it. 435 00:38:30,007 --> 00:38:33,465 - Hold on. - Fuck you. 436 00:38:47,725 --> 00:38:49,716 ONLY 9 DAYS LEFT! SAMNANG 437 00:38:54,832 --> 00:38:56,595 You're done. 438 00:39:02,773 --> 00:39:04,070 WHY DO I DESERVE THIS SCHOLARSHIP? 439 00:39:20,858 --> 00:39:26,421 Look, I'm an idiot, okay? I saw the tape, and I freaked out. 440 00:39:26,664 --> 00:39:29,428 Hi. I'm coming in. Can I come in? 441 00:39:30,868 --> 00:39:32,802 Look, I've just been crazy lately. 442 00:39:33,003 --> 00:39:36,404 I mean, the whole scholarship thing, you know, I mean... 443 00:39:36,607 --> 00:39:38,268 It's killing me, you know? 444 00:39:38,509 --> 00:39:41,273 But I'm not even thinking about that. 445 00:39:41,512 --> 00:39:45,846 The only thing I care about is you, you know? 446 00:39:46,083 --> 00:39:48,677 All I want is just for us to go back to normal again. 447 00:39:48,886 --> 00:39:51,912 It's a real nice place you got here, D. 448 00:39:53,090 --> 00:39:54,990 I... 449 00:40:07,204 --> 00:40:08,796 Can we... 450 00:40:09,507 --> 00:40:12,271 ...talk about this later? - Yeah. 451 00:40:14,712 --> 00:40:16,145 Sure. 452 00:40:33,030 --> 00:40:34,327 I like that. 453 00:40:35,166 --> 00:40:38,033 - What? - What you said in there. 454 00:40:38,502 --> 00:40:39,867 Thanks. 455 00:40:45,276 --> 00:40:46,641 Kelly. 456 00:40:47,645 --> 00:40:49,203 Matthew. 457 00:40:54,285 --> 00:40:56,515 - So you're friends with D, huh? - Yeah. 458 00:40:57,087 --> 00:41:00,853 Well, we're- We're kind of going out. 459 00:41:03,594 --> 00:41:08,224 Look at you. You are a forest fire. 460 00:41:09,033 --> 00:41:10,694 - Are we going? - Yeah. 461 00:41:11,235 --> 00:41:12,532 You coming with us? 462 00:41:12,770 --> 00:41:15,364 - Where are you going? - Can't. He's got school tomorrow. 463 00:41:15,806 --> 00:41:17,865 No, no, I'm cool. Like, where are we going? 464 00:41:45,970 --> 00:41:47,870 Hey, there. What can I get for you? 465 00:41:47,972 --> 00:41:49,940 We'll get two Scotch rocks and... 466 00:41:50,140 --> 00:41:53,803 Make it three. Actually, I'll have a Long Island iced tea. 467 00:41:57,481 --> 00:41:58,948 So, what grade are you in, man? 468 00:41:59,049 --> 00:42:01,882 I'm a senior. But I'm about to graduate. 469 00:42:02,086 --> 00:42:04,247 Congratulations. What's next? 470 00:42:04,655 --> 00:42:06,088 Georgetown, hopefully. 471 00:42:06,624 --> 00:42:09,184 - Matthew wants to be president. - Really? 472 00:42:09,426 --> 00:42:10,916 - That's great, man. - Yeah. 473 00:42:11,161 --> 00:42:13,186 How do you two know each other? 474 00:42:13,797 --> 00:42:16,197 How do we know each other? 475 00:42:16,734 --> 00:42:20,568 - We used to work together. - So you're, like, an actor? 476 00:42:21,539 --> 00:42:24,167 No. Strictly producer. 477 00:42:24,375 --> 00:42:28,277 But D and I also used to go out. Excuse me a sec. 478 00:42:30,180 --> 00:42:31,442 So you guys went out? 479 00:42:33,751 --> 00:42:35,241 Thank you. 480 00:42:35,452 --> 00:42:37,443 Look, can we just talk? 481 00:42:38,255 --> 00:42:39,517 Talk. 482 00:42:41,025 --> 00:42:43,152 I don't know if this is really the place. 483 00:42:43,394 --> 00:42:47,990 - Why? What's wrong with it? - No, nothing. It's fine, you know. 484 00:42:48,198 --> 00:42:50,132 It's one of my favorites. 485 00:42:55,072 --> 00:42:57,370 Hey, you got one for me? 486 00:43:06,317 --> 00:43:08,046 - What are you doing? - What? 487 00:43:08,285 --> 00:43:09,775 Here. 488 00:43:11,355 --> 00:43:13,516 And you turn it like so: 489 00:43:20,164 --> 00:43:24,396 - Hey, where are you going? - The bathroom. Is that okay? 490 00:43:24,602 --> 00:43:26,399 Yeah. 491 00:43:29,673 --> 00:43:32,005 So you're really into her, huh? 492 00:43:32,209 --> 00:43:36,305 Hey. I get it, man, believe me. She's gorgeous. 493 00:43:36,814 --> 00:43:39,180 I just think you'd want someone more your age. 494 00:43:39,617 --> 00:43:44,145 - She's my age. - Yeah, I meant experience-wise. 495 00:43:44,355 --> 00:43:46,016 No offense. 496 00:43:47,224 --> 00:43:49,818 Don't worry about it. I'm gonna take care of you. 497 00:43:51,762 --> 00:43:54,162 Oh, my God. That's Mr. Peterson. 498 00:43:54,398 --> 00:44:55,485 That's my dad's friend. 499 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 He comes over all the time with his wife. 500 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 Really? 501 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 Hey, Peterson. 502 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 What? Dude, what are you doing, man? 503 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 Yeah, you. Get over here. 504 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 Goddamn, Peterson, haven't seen your black ass in ages. 505 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 - Do I know you? - What the fuck's your problem? 506 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 - I... - Just fucking with you, man. 507 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 Hey, you know my friend Matty here, right? 508 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 - Matthew. Hi. - Peterson, this is Matty's first time. 509 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 Why don't you buy him a dance. 510 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 So did you hear about that scholarship yet? 511 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,485 No, big dinner's on Thursday. 512 00:44:55,485 --> 00:44:55,654 So, what's it for again? 513 00:44:55,893 --> 00:44:57,952 The scholarship. 514 00:44:59,129 --> 00:45:01,120 It's for... 515 00:45:01,331 --> 00:45:03,492 ...moral fiber. 516 00:45:06,270 --> 00:45:09,103 Me? A Teenage Daddy? 517 00:45:09,339 --> 00:45:11,864 Who is this guy? Is he a porn producer? 518 00:45:11,975 --> 00:45:14,000 Klitz, shut up. Now, the strippers. 519 00:45:14,211 --> 00:45:17,578 When you get a lap dance, were they cool with you grabbing their ass? 520 00:45:17,781 --> 00:45:19,840 Dude. I'm trying to talk about Danielle here. 521 00:45:20,050 --> 00:45:22,610 Fine. Selfish bitch. 522 00:45:22,820 --> 00:45:26,756 For teenagers, sexual intercourse can be dangerous. 523 00:45:26,990 --> 00:45:28,582 Jesus, what hack made this? 524 00:45:28,826 --> 00:45:31,624 I could make a better sex-ed film with my mom. 525 00:45:31,829 --> 00:45:33,626 Why don't they update this thing? 526 00:45:33,964 --> 00:45:36,125 Special events, such as your senior prom... 527 00:45:36,333 --> 00:45:39,496 ...place added pressure on young teens to lose their virginity... 528 00:45:39,703 --> 00:45:42,171 ...and also engage in unprotected sex. 529 00:45:42,439 --> 00:45:44,168 9 months later... 530 00:45:45,709 --> 00:45:47,506 - Hello? - Hey, Bob. 531 00:45:47,711 --> 00:45:48,905 We're all going to the creek tonight. 532 00:45:49,012 --> 00:45:51,913 It's gonna be a gas. You're coming, right? 533 00:45:52,082 --> 00:45:54,175 I can't, guys. 534 00:45:55,152 --> 00:45:58,280 I have a baby now. 535 00:45:59,690 --> 00:46:01,954 Because of prom. 536 00:46:02,392 --> 00:46:03,984 Dude. 537 00:46:05,696 --> 00:46:08,927 - What? - Yeah, right. 538 00:46:09,466 --> 00:46:13,562 - You guys ever thought about it? - No. 539 00:46:15,205 --> 00:46:17,196 I just think you guys would be really hot. 540 00:46:17,407 --> 00:46:19,170 - You girls are 18, right? - I am. 541 00:46:19,376 --> 00:46:21,367 - I will be in a month. - Really? 542 00:46:21,612 --> 00:46:23,978 - You ever been photographed? - A couple of times. 543 00:46:24,181 --> 00:46:26,547 Hey, you guys know Matty? 544 00:46:26,784 --> 00:46:29,651 I hung with him last night. Guy's the tits. 545 00:46:30,187 --> 00:46:32,451 Here's my man. 546 00:46:33,023 --> 00:46:36,049 - How you doing? - What's up, fellas? 547 00:46:38,929 --> 00:46:41,898 Matty, you didn't tell me you got some serious burners... 548 00:46:41,999 --> 00:46:43,023 ...at your school here. 549 00:46:43,233 --> 00:46:45,098 Oh, shut up. You did not say that 550 00:46:45,302 --> 00:46:48,032 Hey, you know who's got the killer bud? 551 00:46:50,040 --> 00:46:52,565 This fucker right here. 552 00:46:54,044 --> 00:46:56,342 - What are you talking about? - Yeah, come on. 553 00:46:56,547 --> 00:46:58,344 Yeah, you have some? 554 00:46:58,549 --> 00:47:00,039 Yeah, come on. 555 00:47:00,417 --> 00:47:03,045 - Holy shit. - You guys should party. 556 00:47:03,287 --> 00:47:05,380 - Can l...? - All right, we're out. 557 00:47:05,622 --> 00:47:07,715 - Hold on a sec. - Where are you guys going? 558 00:47:07,925 --> 00:47:10,018 - We got things to do. - Do you wanna hang out? 559 00:47:10,227 --> 00:47:14,027 - Hop in, fellas. - Aren't you gonna photograph us? 560 00:47:16,967 --> 00:47:18,764 Always leave them wanting more. 561 00:47:18,969 --> 00:47:20,732 Punch it! 562 00:47:36,420 --> 00:47:39,719 Man, there is some talent here. 563 00:47:40,457 --> 00:47:43,392 You get those girls together with those ass-bags there... 564 00:47:43,594 --> 00:47:45,892 ...shoot them humping at, like, a football... 565 00:47:45,996 --> 00:47:48,396 ...game or at a prom, that video would sell. 566 00:47:48,599 --> 00:47:50,590 Fuck, I'm good! 567 00:47:50,801 --> 00:47:54,965 How do I get these ideas? It's like a gift, you know? 568 00:47:55,172 --> 00:47:56,605 It's like I can't control it. 569 00:48:00,611 --> 00:48:04,274 So, what are we doing, man? 570 00:48:08,118 --> 00:48:10,416 You know, you really didn't have to come with me. 571 00:48:10,621 --> 00:48:14,352 It's cool. I like running errands. 572 00:48:15,692 --> 00:48:18,991 So you raised 25 G's just to bring this Chinese guy over. 573 00:48:19,196 --> 00:48:21,323 No, he's Cambodian. 574 00:48:21,698 --> 00:48:25,156 Okay, so that's 25,000 total deposited... 575 00:48:25,369 --> 00:48:27,929 ...into the Operation Get Samnang account. 576 00:48:28,305 --> 00:48:30,637 Hey, so you raised all the money you needed. 577 00:48:30,841 --> 00:48:32,468 - Congratulations. - Thanks. 578 00:48:32,676 --> 00:48:34,837 So is this Samnang really as smart as they say? 579 00:48:35,045 --> 00:48:37,878 Well, he did teach himself calculus without even using... 580 00:48:37,981 --> 00:48:39,471 ...his textbooks, so... 581 00:48:39,683 --> 00:48:43,585 Those crazy little fuckers, man. They sure know their numbers. 582 00:48:46,189 --> 00:48:49,784 Jeannie, this is my... This is my student advisor. 583 00:48:49,784 --> 00:49:02,304 They really compliment your coloring. 584 00:49:02,304 --> 00:49:02,304 Oh, you're Mr. Salinger? 585 00:49:02,304 --> 00:49:02,304 Just here to make sure everything's up to par. Wow. 586 00:49:02,304 --> 00:49:02,304 - What? - I love those earrings. 587 00:49:02,304 --> 00:49:02,304 Oh, thank you. 588 00:49:02,506 --> 00:49:04,497 Thanks. I just got back from Cabo. 589 00:49:04,741 --> 00:49:06,140 - Did you? - Yeah. 590 00:49:06,343 --> 00:49:09,141 Okay, well, we gotta go. Thanks, Jeannie. 591 00:49:10,447 --> 00:49:12,540 Man, what were you doing...? 592 00:49:12,783 --> 00:49:14,842 There's a bar, you sit with the people. 593 00:49:14,952 --> 00:49:15,850 You have been there. 594 00:49:16,053 --> 00:49:18,146 - See? I knew it. - No, no. 595 00:49:18,355 --> 00:49:21,483 - This guy is unbelievable. - You. 596 00:49:30,867 --> 00:49:33,495 - Where you guys going? - Vegas, baby. 597 00:49:33,704 --> 00:49:38,607 We got the convention. Gotta press the flesh, meet the fans. 598 00:49:38,809 --> 00:49:41,710 So that's it? You're just going back? 599 00:49:41,912 --> 00:49:43,903 I don't belong here. 600 00:49:44,114 --> 00:49:47,743 What do you...? What do you mean? What about starting over? 601 00:49:48,385 --> 00:49:49,750 This is what I am. 602 00:49:53,390 --> 00:49:56,154 All right, D, let's roll. 603 00:50:14,077 --> 00:50:17,604 - Dude, it's not your fault. - No, it is my fault. 604 00:50:18,115 --> 00:50:21,243 If I hadn't been such a dick and taken her to that motel room... 605 00:50:21,451 --> 00:50:23,817 Yeah, it was a little forward, don't you think? 606 00:50:24,988 --> 00:50:26,478 - Dude. - What? 607 00:50:26,723 --> 00:50:29,385 Matt, the point is, she made her decision. 608 00:50:29,860 --> 00:50:32,260 There's nothing you can do about it now. 609 00:50:37,467 --> 00:50:38,900 Yeah, there is. 610 00:50:46,343 --> 00:50:47,640 - Hey, Dad? - Don't wait up. 611 00:50:47,844 --> 00:50:50,108 - I'll be late tonight. - I'll watch it tomorrow. 612 00:50:50,313 --> 00:50:53,578 - Shark Week is all week long. - God, I just wanna bang hot chicks. 613 00:51:05,762 --> 00:51:11,860 LAS VEGAS WELCOMES THE ADULT FILM CONVENTION 614 00:51:41,865 --> 00:51:44,663 - Move it. - Sorry. 615 00:51:45,602 --> 00:51:46,899 Big smile. 616 00:51:49,005 --> 00:51:50,973 - Sasha! - Sasha! 617 00:51:57,547 --> 00:52:00,516 - Yo, man, no press. - No, no. No, I'm not press. 618 00:52:00,917 --> 00:52:02,407 I'm still in high school, okay? 619 00:52:02,519 --> 00:52:04,419 This is for my high school video yearbook. 620 00:52:04,621 --> 00:52:05,918 I swear to God. 621 00:52:09,526 --> 00:52:10,993 That's right, bitch. 622 00:52:17,334 --> 00:52:18,892 Jesus, is that her? 623 00:52:19,136 --> 00:52:20,398 Athena. 624 00:52:40,991 --> 00:52:42,891 Give me a second, guys. 625 00:52:43,126 --> 00:52:44,753 - Athena! - Athena! 626 00:52:44,995 --> 00:52:47,225 - Danielle. - Athena! Athena! 627 00:52:47,430 --> 00:52:49,523 - Danielle. - Come on! Athena, right here! 628 00:52:49,733 --> 00:52:53,191 - Work it, Athena. - You are so hot, Athena. 629 00:52:55,939 --> 00:53:00,273 - Look, I'm sorry. I had to come. - Asshole, I'm next. 630 00:53:01,144 --> 00:53:03,908 - I feel like this is all my fault. - Who is this guy? 631 00:53:04,814 --> 00:53:08,716 - Will you at least look at me? - Bend over. 632 00:53:08,952 --> 00:53:11,420 You're the best thing that ever happened to me, okay? 633 00:53:11,655 --> 00:53:13,555 - Me too! - Oh, Danielle. 634 00:53:13,790 --> 00:53:15,655 He's so sweet. 635 00:53:19,129 --> 00:53:20,653 Danielle. 636 00:53:20,931 --> 00:53:23,399 Nice job, dickwad. 637 00:53:23,633 --> 00:53:26,261 - Danielle. - Hey, man, get me out of this thing. 638 00:53:26,469 --> 00:53:28,096 - Take me with you, dude. - Danielle. 639 00:53:28,305 --> 00:53:30,865 Just leave me alone, please. 640 00:53:31,274 --> 00:53:33,242 Danielle. 641 00:53:34,711 --> 00:53:38,112 - Danielle, Danielle. - Hugo, hi. 642 00:53:38,315 --> 00:53:40,875 Look at you. You look fantastic. 643 00:53:43,987 --> 00:53:46,251 Just starting out, and everyone knows your name. 644 00:53:46,456 --> 00:53:47,980 No, they don't. 645 00:53:48,191 --> 00:53:50,523 - So how's Kelly treating you? - Okay. 646 00:53:50,727 --> 00:53:52,752 Just okay? 647 00:53:52,996 --> 00:53:55,123 Danielle, what do we know? 648 00:53:55,966 --> 00:53:59,766 What do we know? We know that you should be with me. 649 00:53:59,970 --> 00:54:03,929 At the top. Where the air is crisp. 650 00:54:04,140 --> 00:54:06,165 - Nice tan. - Kelly. 651 00:54:06,376 --> 00:54:09,277 - What do we say? - Fuck you. 652 00:54:10,680 --> 00:54:12,511 Always with the big words. 653 00:54:12,716 --> 00:54:16,447 Danielle, where the air is crisp. 654 00:54:18,321 --> 00:54:21,484 - What does that mean? - Nothing. He's just being Hugo. 655 00:54:22,058 --> 00:54:24,720 Matty. What are you doing here? 656 00:54:26,963 --> 00:54:30,023 Look, Kelly, no offense, but I really don't think Danielle... 657 00:54:30,233 --> 00:54:31,666 ...wants to be here right now. 658 00:54:36,339 --> 00:54:39,706 Matthew, please just go home, okay? 659 00:54:41,745 --> 00:54:43,576 Hey, D. 660 00:54:45,015 --> 00:54:48,507 I'm sorry, man. Come on. Let's get out of here. 661 00:54:52,756 --> 00:54:54,348 What's up? 662 00:54:55,425 --> 00:54:57,325 It's not cute anymore. 663 00:54:57,527 --> 00:54:59,757 - What? - Stop filling her head with that... 664 00:54:59,996 --> 00:55:03,488 - Do not piss me off. - Hey, I thought we were friends. 665 00:55:04,901 --> 00:55:07,062 Friends don't fuck with each other's business. 666 00:55:07,270 --> 00:55:10,171 And that's what this is, my fucking business. 667 00:55:13,243 --> 00:55:14,608 What? 668 00:55:15,745 --> 00:55:17,906 What are you gonna do? 669 00:55:21,318 --> 00:55:26,221 Yeah, that's what I thought. Stay the fuck away from her. 670 00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:32,856 Matt, seriously, man, it's 2:00 in the morning. 671 00:55:33,063 --> 00:55:36,590 What about your thing tomorrow? Okay, the scholarship dinner? 672 00:55:37,167 --> 00:55:39,863 Sorry, I gotta do this. 673 00:55:45,442 --> 00:55:48,900 Oh, by the way, if things get bad, just bolt, okay? 674 00:55:49,112 --> 00:55:51,137 What? What do you mean, "if things get bad"? 675 00:55:51,348 --> 00:55:52,645 Just bolt. 676 00:55:53,483 --> 00:55:54,245 Wait, what's he talking about? 677 00:55:58,588 --> 00:56:00,818 You wanna get me a drink? No, I'm just kidding. 678 00:56:13,169 --> 00:56:14,466 Hi. 679 00:56:20,110 --> 00:56:21,509 Dude... 680 00:56:21,711 --> 00:56:23,303 ...am I ugly? 681 00:56:23,780 --> 00:56:28,114 What? No. No, man, you're fine. Just relax. 682 00:56:28,318 --> 00:56:30,115 No, I'm ugly. I know it. 683 00:56:32,389 --> 00:56:35,916 - So, what do you guys do? - I get freaky. 684 00:56:38,661 --> 00:56:41,289 - We're directors. - Really? 685 00:56:41,531 --> 00:56:44,557 Would you guys ever wanna use me in one of your movies? 686 00:56:45,902 --> 00:56:47,529 Hell, yeah, we'll use you. 687 00:56:47,737 --> 00:56:51,764 Baby, I'll do things to you I wouldn't do to a farm animal. 688 00:56:52,008 --> 00:56:55,774 - What the fuck did you just say? - Honey. These guys are directors. 689 00:56:55,979 --> 00:56:58,641 - And they wanna use me. - Use you? 690 00:56:58,848 --> 00:57:01,646 Guys, this is my boyfriend, Mule. 691 00:57:04,721 --> 00:57:06,154 Hi, Mule. 692 00:57:10,360 --> 00:57:11,725 Let's do it. 693 00:57:12,829 --> 00:57:16,128 Man, you gotta use my girl, bro. She's so good. 694 00:57:16,332 --> 00:57:18,027 I am. I really am. 695 00:57:18,501 --> 00:57:21,834 - You wanna give her a throw? - Yeah, try me out. 696 00:57:22,772 --> 00:57:24,899 No, you know, no, I'm okay, though, thank you. 697 00:57:25,141 --> 00:57:27,666 Well, come on. At least feel her tits. 698 00:57:28,711 --> 00:57:31,009 I'm okay. I can't. Thank you, though. 699 00:57:31,714 --> 00:57:34,615 Fuck it. I'll feel one. 700 00:57:45,795 --> 00:57:47,228 We're all set for tomorrow. 701 00:57:47,330 --> 00:57:51,232 Athena will be there, ready to shoot. Right, babe? 702 00:57:52,302 --> 00:57:56,568 Not bad, huh? Suckers cost me 6 grand. 703 00:57:56,773 --> 00:58:00,231 Yo, Mule, what the hell are you doing? 704 00:58:00,743 --> 00:58:05,442 Steel, check it out, man. These guys are directors. 705 00:58:05,782 --> 00:58:07,010 Man, these punks ain't directors. 706 00:58:07,116 --> 00:58:10,017 They're in high school, you idiot. 707 00:58:12,188 --> 00:58:14,281 Okay, here's the thing... 708 00:58:21,965 --> 00:58:24,263 Oh, shit! 709 00:58:27,103 --> 00:58:28,968 - Come on, Klitz, come on. - Get off. 710 00:58:38,748 --> 00:58:40,773 Matty, time to go, time to go. Time to go. 711 00:58:40,984 --> 00:58:43,043 - What happened? - It got bad. Bolt. Bolt! 712 00:58:43,419 --> 00:58:45,546 - Dude, wait up. - Fuck you, dude! 713 00:58:53,129 --> 00:58:54,118 Excuse me. 714 00:58:54,230 --> 00:58:57,461 I just wanna let you know, I know who you really are. 715 00:59:00,036 --> 00:59:02,732 And you're better than this. 716 00:59:39,876 --> 00:59:41,776 IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY DREAM... 717 00:59:42,879 --> 00:59:44,813 Yeah? 718 00:59:52,155 --> 00:59:53,554 Need a ride to school? 719 00:59:57,927 --> 01:00:01,624 It's all you now. I mean, now you can do whatever you want. 720 01:00:02,832 --> 01:00:04,663 Why do you believe in me so much? 721 01:00:05,535 --> 01:00:07,503 I don't know. Maybe I'm stupid. 722 01:00:12,375 --> 01:00:16,038 - Good luck tonight. - Thanks. 723 01:00:17,080 --> 01:00:19,412 - Bye. - Bye. 724 01:00:35,264 --> 01:00:36,822 Will you go to prom with me? 725 01:00:39,435 --> 01:00:40,925 What? 726 01:00:46,342 --> 01:00:48,674 I would love to. 727 01:00:52,081 --> 01:00:55,346 Now for the scientific explanation. Anybody? 728 01:00:55,551 --> 01:00:57,382 JOHN F. KENNEDY once said: ASK NOT... 729 01:00:59,722 --> 01:01:01,917 That's your speech? 730 01:01:02,759 --> 01:01:04,454 Yeah. 731 01:01:04,927 --> 01:01:07,054 You ready for tonight? 732 01:01:08,264 --> 01:01:10,425 Hey, don't worry, man. You're gonna be great. 733 01:01:10,967 --> 01:01:12,730 I have to be. 734 01:01:25,148 --> 01:01:26,911 That bitch can't just run away because... 735 01:01:27,016 --> 01:01:28,881 ...she don't wanna fuck on film anymore. 736 01:01:29,085 --> 01:01:30,712 May I help you? 737 01:01:32,655 --> 01:01:35,146 - Get up. - Okay, okay. 738 01:01:43,666 --> 01:01:45,896 Stay in school. 739 01:01:49,505 --> 01:01:52,338 Look, I have the most important dinner of my life tonight... 740 01:01:52,542 --> 01:01:54,066 ...so wherever we're going, you know... 741 01:01:54,177 --> 01:01:56,077 ...we just have to be home by 6. 742 01:01:56,279 --> 01:01:58,474 Just so you know. 743 01:02:00,283 --> 01:02:02,649 Here he comes. 744 01:02:04,687 --> 01:02:07,247 - It's a cool ride, huh? - Yeah, if you're a fag. 745 01:02:07,457 --> 01:02:10,585 - Jesus! - It's cool, it's cool. 746 01:02:11,160 --> 01:02:12,525 Get in. 747 01:02:24,707 --> 01:02:27,505 - Where are we going? - I thought you were cool, man. 748 01:02:27,710 --> 01:02:29,837 I tried to be your friend, and what do you do? 749 01:02:30,046 --> 01:02:31,775 - You fuck me. - I didn't fuck you. 750 01:02:31,981 --> 01:02:34,449 She didn't show up on set because of what you said. 751 01:02:34,650 --> 01:02:36,140 Now I'm out 30 grand. 752 01:02:37,520 --> 01:02:41,422 - Guess who's paying me back. - What? I don't have 30 grand. 753 01:02:41,657 --> 01:02:44,455 - Get your folks to help. - They don't have that kind of money. 754 01:02:44,660 --> 01:02:50,462 Look, Kelly, I'm a problem solver, all right? This is what I do. Okay? 755 01:02:50,666 --> 01:02:54,727 Let's just... Let's just think outside of the box here. 756 01:02:55,238 --> 01:02:57,433 Look, she'll get a job, I'll keep mowing... 757 01:02:57,540 --> 01:03:00,168 ...lawns, and over time we'll pay it down. 758 01:03:00,376 --> 01:03:03,004 You know? This can work. We can do this. 759 01:03:03,212 --> 01:03:05,680 It'll be like a payment plan. 760 01:03:13,289 --> 01:03:16,156 - You really care about her, huh? - Yeah, I really do. 761 01:03:16,359 --> 01:03:19,851 Yeah, I don't know. If I'm gonna do this payment-plan thing... 762 01:03:20,062 --> 01:03:22,326 ...I need a show of good faith, you know? 763 01:03:22,565 --> 01:03:26,023 - Something concrete. - Well, like what? 764 01:03:28,204 --> 01:03:29,535 A blowjob. 765 01:03:31,874 --> 01:03:34,104 No. I told you she's not gonna do that anymore. 766 01:03:35,044 --> 01:03:37,069 Who said anything about her? 767 01:03:40,783 --> 01:03:44,742 Yeah, we're definitely outside the box now, huh? 768 01:03:45,588 --> 01:03:50,025 Now, you gotta ask yourself, how far are you willing to go? 769 01:03:52,328 --> 01:03:54,922 How much do you really care about her? 770 01:04:00,102 --> 01:04:01,729 I'm joking, man. 771 01:04:04,407 --> 01:04:05,772 Relax. 772 01:04:07,410 --> 01:04:10,379 - Damn. Do I look gay to you? - No, but, Jesus... 773 01:04:18,654 --> 01:04:19,780 You wanna be president? 774 01:04:19,889 --> 01:04:22,255 Let me tell you the first rule of politics: 775 01:04:22,458 --> 01:04:26,792 Always know if the juice is worth the squeeze. 776 01:04:26,996 --> 01:04:29,965 You know what that means? It means you don't steal my girl... 777 01:04:30,166 --> 01:04:32,532 ...unless you're ready to accept the consequences. 778 01:04:38,341 --> 01:04:40,571 All right, I'm sorry, okay? 779 01:04:43,579 --> 01:04:46,480 That's gonna swell up like a bitch. Here, take this. 780 01:04:50,720 --> 01:04:53,188 I'm telling you, it's gonna hurt like shit. 781 01:04:59,395 --> 01:05:05,356 I'm sorry I got upset. I felt taken advantage of. 782 01:05:05,801 --> 01:05:09,328 Look, I'm not gonna be a dick. I know she loves you. 783 01:05:09,605 --> 01:05:11,869 I'm gonna leave you guys alone. 784 01:05:11,974 --> 01:05:14,135 But now you're doing something for me. 785 01:05:24,754 --> 01:05:27,382 Remember that ass-bag, Hugo, from the convention? 786 01:05:27,657 --> 01:05:29,887 We used to be partners a long time ago. 787 01:05:30,126 --> 01:05:33,095 One day, I had this killer idea to make films set... 788 01:05:33,195 --> 01:05:34,093 ...in real-life situations. 789 01:05:34,330 --> 01:05:37,390 You know, Real World porn. 790 01:05:37,633 --> 01:05:40,500 I told the idea to Hugo. He says he'll think about it. 791 01:05:40,703 --> 01:05:42,796 And what does that motherfucker do? 792 01:05:43,005 --> 01:05:46,566 Takes my best girl, starts his own company with my idea... 793 01:05:46,776 --> 01:05:49,108 ...and the guy makes millions. 794 01:05:49,345 --> 01:05:50,573 It's not the money that pisses me off. 795 01:05:50,680 --> 01:05:52,875 I mean, fuck, it does piss me off... 796 01:05:53,082 --> 01:05:55,050 ...but that's not it. It's the perception. 797 01:05:55,251 --> 01:05:58,084 Everybody thinks Hugo's the genius. It was my idea. 798 01:05:58,287 --> 01:06:02,053 It's like he's Simon, and I'm Garfunkel. 799 01:06:02,858 --> 01:06:07,192 Look at me, man. I'm fucking Garfunkel. 800 01:06:10,166 --> 01:06:15,263 - Look, seriously, I can't do this. - Don't be a pussy. Nobody's home. 801 01:06:20,276 --> 01:06:23,677 - Why do you want this thing so bad? - Because it should've been mine. 802 01:06:23,913 --> 01:06:26,211 - I'll grab it and leave. - You don't understand... 803 01:06:26,415 --> 01:06:28,349 ...I have to be at a dinner in an hour. 804 01:06:28,451 --> 01:06:30,351 My whole life depends on it. 805 01:06:30,553 --> 01:06:32,282 You want me out of Danielle's life? 806 01:06:32,388 --> 01:06:33,616 Yes, I do. 807 01:06:33,823 --> 01:06:36,348 - Then let's go. - But wait, seriously. 808 01:06:36,559 --> 01:06:38,618 Sometimes, if you wanna do something good... 809 01:06:38,828 --> 01:06:40,728 ...you gotta do something bad. 810 01:06:40,830 --> 01:06:43,264 Yeah, but this is breaking and entering. 811 01:06:43,466 --> 01:06:45,866 This is politics. 812 01:06:50,206 --> 01:06:51,639 Hey. 813 01:06:51,841 --> 01:06:54,605 After this, we're cool, okay? 814 01:06:56,846 --> 01:06:59,280 You're all right, man. 815 01:07:27,043 --> 01:07:28,704 Yes. 816 01:07:29,011 --> 01:07:30,774 I'd like to report a robbery. 817 01:07:40,189 --> 01:07:42,350 AVN BEST PICTURE 1999 "CHITTY CHITTY GANG BANG" 818 01:07:42,558 --> 01:07:43,820 HUGO POSH PRODUCER 819 01:07:44,894 --> 01:07:47,294 Bang me. 820 01:07:49,265 --> 01:07:50,926 Cradle the balls. 821 01:08:03,512 --> 01:08:06,140 Stop! Stop! Help me! 822 01:08:06,382 --> 01:08:08,976 Help! Oh, fuck! 823 01:08:13,522 --> 01:08:15,285 Wait! 824 01:08:15,491 --> 01:08:16,822 Come on! 825 01:08:35,878 --> 01:08:37,812 Okay, so what time does the dinner start? 826 01:08:38,013 --> 01:08:39,344 Six o'clock. 827 01:08:39,548 --> 01:08:42,483 - Why? What time is it now? - 6:30. 828 01:08:42,718 --> 01:08:45,050 - Oh, my God. - Dude, don't worry, all right? 829 01:08:45,254 --> 01:08:47,518 We'll get there. You know what? Try and... 830 01:08:47,723 --> 01:08:51,591 - Dude, what are you doing? - I don't know. I just... 831 01:08:52,595 --> 01:08:54,426 ...feel so good. 832 01:09:03,272 --> 01:09:05,240 Oh, my God. 833 01:09:06,842 --> 01:09:08,935 I just feel so weird. 834 01:09:09,145 --> 01:09:11,443 Don't worry. Ecstasy is not that bad. 835 01:09:11,714 --> 01:09:14,683 - What? - Kelly likes dosing people with E. 836 01:09:15,751 --> 01:09:18,219 Oh, my God. Am I gonna die? 837 01:09:18,420 --> 01:09:22,447 No, no, no. It's okay, Matt. You're gonna be fine. I promise. 838 01:09:22,725 --> 01:09:26,388 You're such a good friend, Klitzy. I love you. 839 01:09:26,629 --> 01:09:28,722 I love you so much. 840 01:09:30,132 --> 01:09:32,066 This is gonna be amazing. 841 01:09:33,469 --> 01:09:35,334 Wait a second. 842 01:09:35,571 --> 01:09:37,436 Oh, my God. 843 01:09:37,640 --> 01:09:39,631 WELCOME TO THE SHERIDAN SCHOLARSHIP BANQUET 844 01:09:42,178 --> 01:09:44,772 You don't understand. It's really kicking in right now. 845 01:09:44,980 --> 01:09:47,107 Just try not to talk so much, okay? 846 01:09:47,216 --> 01:09:49,116 Talk so much? I'm giving a speech. 847 01:09:49,318 --> 01:09:51,411 - It's okay. Just go with it. - Wait, wait. 848 01:09:51,620 --> 01:09:52,587 In a few minutes, we'll begin the speeches, and we hope... 849 01:10:02,765 --> 01:10:04,426 Thank you again for coming to what... 850 01:10:04,533 --> 01:10:07,434 ...promises to be a very eventful evening. 851 01:10:10,005 --> 01:10:11,666 Matthew Kidman? 852 01:10:15,911 --> 01:10:17,242 My competition. 853 01:10:17,446 --> 01:10:20,779 - Hey, what's up, Ryan? - Jesus, what happened to you? 854 01:10:20,983 --> 01:10:23,474 Just living life, my man. 855 01:10:23,686 --> 01:10:25,620 Mina, how are you? 856 01:10:25,821 --> 01:10:27,755 Okay. Just a little nervous. 857 01:10:27,957 --> 01:10:30,289 But you're a little temptress, though, aren't you? 858 01:10:37,666 --> 01:10:39,327 Hey, buddy. How you doing? 859 01:10:39,535 --> 01:10:42,595 Hey. Thanks a lot, thanks a lot. 860 01:11:06,762 --> 01:11:09,128 Hey, there's the big daddy. 861 01:11:09,365 --> 01:11:11,925 Matthew, what has been going on with you? 862 01:11:12,167 --> 01:11:13,862 Some serious shit. 863 01:11:14,103 --> 01:11:16,970 But, Jesus, man, it's good to see you. 864 01:11:17,206 --> 01:11:19,504 Will you excuse us, please? 865 01:11:21,210 --> 01:11:22,541 Oh, my God. Am I blowing it? 866 01:11:22,745 --> 01:11:24,542 Just try and control yourself. 867 01:11:24,747 --> 01:11:28,012 - Just breathe, okay? - All right. 868 01:11:32,921 --> 01:11:35,481 I have learned a lot from my teachers. 869 01:11:36,592 --> 01:11:39,959 But my best teacher has always been my mother... 870 01:11:40,195 --> 01:11:42,857 ...a woman who worked three jobs trying to support me... 871 01:11:43,065 --> 01:11:45,192 ...ever since I was a little ni�a. 872 01:11:45,401 --> 01:11:48,370 I will never forget the day she said to me: 873 01:11:51,607 --> 01:11:54,371 And that is why I have always tried to answer the call... 874 01:11:54,576 --> 01:11:56,237 ...of the great John F. Kennedy... 875 01:11:56,445 --> 01:12:00,040 ...who urged us to "Ask not what your country"... 876 01:12:09,658 --> 01:12:11,523 Let's see here... 877 01:12:11,727 --> 01:12:13,957 I can't speak a foreign language... 878 01:12:14,163 --> 01:12:15,494 ...so that's out. 879 01:12:15,731 --> 01:12:19,565 And l... I certainly can't quote J.F.K. Now... 880 01:12:19,768 --> 01:12:22,293 ...can I, Ryan? You know what? 881 01:12:22,538 --> 01:12:25,564 It's funny, I have this whole speech prepared... 882 01:12:25,774 --> 01:12:28,299 ...and I've been practicing for weeks... 883 01:12:28,544 --> 01:12:30,375 ...but you know what? 884 01:12:30,579 --> 01:12:32,046 I'm just gonna go with it. 885 01:12:35,150 --> 01:12:37,710 Moral fiber. 886 01:12:37,920 --> 01:12:40,548 So, what is moral fiber? I mean... 887 01:12:40,756 --> 01:12:44,123 It's funny, I used to think it was always telling the truth... 888 01:12:44,326 --> 01:12:45,918 ...doing good deeds. 889 01:12:46,128 --> 01:12:48,596 You know, basically being a fucking Boy Scout. 890 01:12:50,432 --> 01:12:52,798 But lately, I've been seeing it differently. 891 01:12:54,203 --> 01:12:56,103 Now I think that moral fiber's about... 892 01:12:56,305 --> 01:12:58,603 ...finding that one thing you really care about. 893 01:12:59,875 --> 01:13:01,365 That one special thing that means more... 894 01:13:01,477 --> 01:13:03,843 ...to you than anything else in the world. 895 01:13:05,614 --> 01:13:06,911 And when you find her... 896 01:13:08,283 --> 01:13:11,480 ...you fight for her. You risk it all. 897 01:13:12,020 --> 01:13:15,820 ...your future, your life... 898 01:13:15,820 --> 01:13:15,820 You put her in front of everything... 899 01:13:16,024 --> 01:13:17,651 ...all of it. 900 01:13:18,594 --> 01:13:22,257 And maybe the stuff you do to help her isn't so clean. 901 01:13:22,998 --> 01:13:24,659 You know what? It doesn't matter. 902 01:13:26,969 --> 01:13:29,062 Because in your heart you know... 903 01:13:29,905 --> 01:13:31,964 ...that the juice is worth the squeeze. 904 01:13:34,510 --> 01:13:36,808 That's what moral fiber's all about. 905 01:14:00,569 --> 01:14:03,367 First, I'd just like to commend the candidates on... 906 01:14:03,472 --> 01:14:05,633 ...their impressive remarks. 907 01:14:06,742 --> 01:14:09,905 This year was a very tough decision. 908 01:14:10,345 --> 01:14:14,679 And as much as we'd love to give you all scholarships, we can't. 909 01:14:15,050 --> 01:14:18,315 And so I am proud to announce the winner... 910 01:14:18,520 --> 01:14:20,647 ...of this year's Sheridan scholarship: 911 01:14:26,061 --> 01:14:28,723 Ryan Winger. 912 01:15:09,505 --> 01:15:11,370 Oh, God, what happened? 913 01:15:12,407 --> 01:15:14,102 Yeah, I slipped. 914 01:15:14,309 --> 01:15:16,903 Listen, Jeannie, Samnang's coming on Monday. 915 01:15:17,112 --> 01:15:19,546 - I know. How exciting. - Yeah. 916 01:15:19,748 --> 01:15:21,716 So I'm gonna need to close out the account. 917 01:15:21,950 --> 01:15:23,577 What do you mean? 918 01:15:23,785 --> 01:15:26,219 I mean I'm gonna need to close out the account. 919 01:15:26,421 --> 01:15:29,288 - But it's already closed. - What are you talking about? 920 01:15:29,525 --> 01:15:32,426 Your teacher came by yesterday and cleared out the account. 921 01:15:32,661 --> 01:15:33,992 Who? What... What teacher? 922 01:15:34,229 --> 01:15:35,890 Your student advisor. Mr. Salinger. 923 01:15:35,998 --> 01:15:37,898 The one you were with the other day. 924 01:15:38,133 --> 01:15:41,466 Mr. Salinger? What are you...? 925 01:15:51,380 --> 01:15:53,575 Cambodia 926 01:15:53,815 --> 01:15:56,340 Samnang, what's wrong, my son? 927 01:15:56,785 --> 01:15:58,810 That Matthew Kidman. 928 01:15:59,021 --> 01:16:04,186 He fucked me, Mom. He fucked me so bad. 929 01:16:04,393 --> 01:16:05,985 Son of a bitch. 930 01:16:09,298 --> 01:16:10,595 Oh, my God. 931 01:16:11,066 --> 01:16:12,658 - What's wrong? - Jeannie... 932 01:16:13,635 --> 01:16:15,364 ...didn't you ask for ID or anything? 933 01:16:16,471 --> 01:16:19,372 You said he was your student advisor. 934 01:16:19,474 --> 01:16:20,771 Oh, my God. 935 01:16:23,011 --> 01:16:25,377 - Jeannie, where are you going? - To get the manager. 936 01:16:25,647 --> 01:16:27,137 No, hold on. Wait, wait, wait. 937 01:16:28,183 --> 01:16:29,445 Matthew, what's going on? 938 01:16:29,985 --> 01:16:31,680 Look... 939 01:16:32,487 --> 01:16:34,512 ...that guy wasn't my student advisor. 940 01:16:35,857 --> 01:16:38,849 No, I know, I know. I can get the money back. 941 01:16:39,061 --> 01:16:42,792 We just need to keep this between me and you for now, okay? 942 01:16:43,398 --> 01:16:46,526 That's a great blouse, by the way. Have you lost weight? 943 01:16:46,868 --> 01:16:48,665 No? No, wait, wait. 944 01:16:49,805 --> 01:16:51,033 Jeannie. 945 01:16:52,674 --> 01:16:55,575 You think about this. This is your fault too. Right? 946 01:16:55,811 --> 01:16:58,302 You didn't ask for ID. You didn't do anything. 947 01:16:58,547 --> 01:17:00,515 And I saw you flirting with him too... 948 01:17:00,616 --> 01:17:01,708 ...all right? So unprofessional. 949 01:17:01,917 --> 01:17:03,851 You'll lose your job over this. 950 01:17:03,952 --> 01:17:05,214 Don't threaten me, you little shit. 951 01:17:05,420 --> 01:17:07,354 I could give a fuck about you and your rice boy. 952 01:17:07,456 --> 01:17:08,821 I'm not getting fired. 953 01:17:09,057 --> 01:17:11,924 Okay, okay. I'm sorry. Just... Please, I... 954 01:17:12,127 --> 01:17:14,322 Just... No one can ever find out about this. 955 01:17:14,529 --> 01:17:17,327 If this gets out, I'll be expelled. My life will be over. 956 01:17:17,566 --> 01:17:19,363 If that money isn't back by Monday... 957 01:17:19,468 --> 01:17:21,436 ...I wouldn't worry about being expelled. 958 01:17:21,637 --> 01:17:23,298 I'd worry about going to jail. 959 01:17:25,574 --> 01:17:27,041 - Jeannie... - Hi, Jeannie. 960 01:17:27,242 --> 01:17:29,073 Hi, Martin. 961 01:17:38,787 --> 01:17:40,084 BANK MANAGER 962 01:17:57,506 --> 01:17:59,599 Matthew, what's wrong? 963 01:17:59,808 --> 01:18:03,471 Matt, is there something you want to talk about? 964 01:18:04,079 --> 01:18:06,741 Matthew, honey, what is it? 965 01:18:13,689 --> 01:18:16,749 - Hi. - Come here. 966 01:18:24,199 --> 01:18:26,360 I'm in so much trouble. 967 01:18:39,014 --> 01:18:42,108 I can't believe we're even thinking about this. 968 01:18:45,120 --> 01:18:47,953 Well, if you need that kind of money by Monday... 969 01:18:48,724 --> 01:18:50,214 Yeah... What are we doing? 970 01:18:50,325 --> 01:18:52,156 I mean, I can't get you involved in this. 971 01:18:52,427 --> 01:18:54,292 I want to do it. 972 01:18:54,663 --> 01:18:56,290 Why? 973 01:18:58,233 --> 01:19:00,258 Moral fiber. 974 01:19:02,337 --> 01:19:02,803 I'm in. 975 01:19:02,904 --> 01:19:04,701 You haven't heard the whole plan yet. 976 01:19:04,940 --> 01:19:06,202 Doesn't matter. 977 01:19:06,441 --> 01:19:08,375 Fuck film school. 978 01:19:08,577 --> 01:19:12,104 This is gonna be huge. This is gonna be my calling card. 979 01:19:13,715 --> 01:19:15,649 - No. - Klitzy... 980 01:19:15,851 --> 01:19:17,648 - No way. - Klitz... 981 01:19:17,853 --> 01:19:20,788 ...you know I wouldn't ask for this unless I really needed it. 982 01:19:21,022 --> 01:19:23,456 Matt believe me, I want to help you, but... No. 983 01:19:23,692 --> 01:19:25,717 - We'll get expelled and... - Klitz, shut up. 984 01:19:25,961 --> 01:19:28,225 Do me a favor, okay? 985 01:19:28,463 --> 01:19:31,990 Take a look at us, okay? Take a good look at us. 986 01:19:32,701 --> 01:19:35,067 Do you know what we are, the three of us? 987 01:19:37,973 --> 01:19:42,137 - What? - We're a fucking tripod. 988 01:19:42,377 --> 01:19:44,572 - A tripod? - Yeah. 989 01:19:44,780 --> 01:19:46,509 And you know what that means? 990 01:19:46,715 --> 01:19:50,446 That means that if you kick out one of our legs, then we all fall. 991 01:19:52,521 --> 01:19:54,045 Come on, baby. 992 01:19:58,994 --> 01:20:00,757 Fuck. 993 01:20:02,564 --> 01:20:04,464 I know it was you, Klitzy. 994 01:20:07,502 --> 01:20:10,062 - Where is she? - Oh, there they are. Hey. 995 01:20:12,207 --> 01:20:14,072 - Hey! - Hi, Danielle. 996 01:20:15,877 --> 01:20:17,708 Hi. 997 01:20:17,913 --> 01:20:19,710 - Hey, let's get our luggage! - Yeah. 998 01:20:19,915 --> 01:20:21,678 - Yeah! - All right? 999 01:20:22,050 --> 01:20:24,041 - I'll be there in a minute. - Okay! 1000 01:20:45,040 --> 01:20:47,770 So if I pull this off, I get the 25 grand on Sunday? 1001 01:20:47,976 --> 01:20:51,639 Kid, you pull this off I'll take care of your little Samsung. 1002 01:20:51,746 --> 01:20:52,804 Samnang. 1003 01:20:53,048 --> 01:20:54,379 Whatever. 1004 01:20:54,583 --> 01:20:56,278 Have a nice prom, kid. 1005 01:20:59,855 --> 01:21:03,018 - All right, minions, over here. - Good luck. 1006 01:21:13,802 --> 01:21:15,633 Relax, relax. 1007 01:21:15,837 --> 01:21:17,896 You know what? Go wait in the car. Go. 1008 01:21:22,811 --> 01:21:24,472 Jesus. 1009 01:21:27,215 --> 01:21:30,810 Gentlemen, these are your prom dates, April and Ferrari. 1010 01:21:31,653 --> 01:21:35,749 Ladies, we have Eli and Klitz. 1011 01:21:36,691 --> 01:21:38,181 Your name is Klitz? 1012 01:21:39,127 --> 01:21:40,617 With a K. 1013 01:21:40,996 --> 01:21:44,830 Okay, get a two-shot. Minions. All right, guys, get closer. 1014 01:21:45,033 --> 01:21:48,696 Yeah, that's right. Show me the love. Oh, feel it. Feel it! 1015 01:21:48,904 --> 01:21:50,599 - Nice. - Eli? 1016 01:21:50,805 --> 01:21:53,000 Do those girls go to your school? 1017 01:21:53,742 --> 01:21:55,266 Actually, no. 1018 01:21:55,510 --> 01:21:56,943 Mrs. Kidman... 1019 01:21:57,145 --> 01:22:01,343 ...they're porn stars. - Oh, yeah, right. 1020 01:22:16,765 --> 01:22:18,665 You look... 1021 01:22:19,401 --> 01:22:20,993 You... You look really nice. 1022 01:22:21,836 --> 01:22:23,326 Thanks. 1023 01:22:23,538 --> 01:22:25,972 You really do, hon. You look so beautiful. 1024 01:22:26,207 --> 01:22:27,538 Really? 1025 01:22:27,742 --> 01:22:29,107 Thanks. 1026 01:22:48,096 --> 01:22:49,688 WELCOME TO THE SENIOR PROM 1027 01:23:17,926 --> 01:23:19,416 What are all these cameras for? 1028 01:23:20,428 --> 01:23:22,157 For video yearbook. 1029 01:23:46,421 --> 01:23:49,982 So, what should we do? Should we start setting up? 1030 01:23:50,225 --> 01:23:52,921 Yeah, look, we just gotta keep this low-key, okay? 1031 01:23:53,128 --> 01:23:54,459 Okay. What are you gonna do? 1032 01:23:56,364 --> 01:23:57,991 I'm gonna get our actors. 1033 01:24:01,002 --> 01:24:04,130 - Dude, make sure they can act. - Yeah, all right. 1034 01:24:04,339 --> 01:24:07,740 - Just get out of here, okay? - Hey, I got this taken care of. 1035 01:24:07,942 --> 01:24:10,968 You just show this little lady a good time tonight, all right? 1036 01:24:11,179 --> 01:24:13,647 - Minions, let's move. - Wait. So, what are we doing? 1037 01:24:13,848 --> 01:24:15,110 Relax, relax. 1038 01:24:20,155 --> 01:24:22,146 Come on, play it cool, play it cool. 1039 01:24:37,405 --> 01:24:39,373 Look, they're coming to you. 1040 01:24:40,341 --> 01:24:41,638 I, Matt. 1041 01:24:41,843 --> 01:24:43,811 - What's up? - What's up? 1042 01:24:44,412 --> 01:24:48,143 - Can we talk to you for a second? - Dude, I'm with my girl here. 1043 01:24:49,217 --> 01:24:51,276 - Sorry, man. - Should we come back? 1044 01:24:51,486 --> 01:24:53,750 No, I'll leave you guys alone. 1045 01:25:07,168 --> 01:25:07,862 What's up? 1046 01:25:07,969 --> 01:25:09,869 Hey, man, what's up with those girls? 1047 01:25:10,105 --> 01:25:13,700 - What about them? - Are they, like...? 1048 01:25:14,943 --> 01:25:16,274 Are they porn stars? 1049 01:25:17,112 --> 01:25:19,512 - Yeah. - Shit. 1050 01:25:20,815 --> 01:25:22,578 I knew I recognized them. I knew it. 1051 01:25:23,718 --> 01:25:25,777 - Can we meet them? - Yeah. 1052 01:25:29,057 --> 01:25:31,525 How'd you boys like to be in a movie? 1053 01:25:31,759 --> 01:25:33,556 - What are these? - Your scripts. 1054 01:25:33,761 --> 01:25:35,558 Sign the release form at the top. 1055 01:25:35,763 --> 01:25:38,095 Come on, you guys, wait up! 1056 01:25:41,102 --> 01:25:42,399 PHOTO RELEASE 1057 01:25:46,574 --> 01:25:47,871 Are these our actors? 1058 01:25:48,643 --> 01:25:50,611 Just these two. 1059 01:25:50,845 --> 01:25:52,745 What about me, dude? 1060 01:25:52,947 --> 01:25:56,610 Sorry, bro. Party's all full. 1061 01:25:58,486 --> 01:25:59,953 Gentlemen. 1062 01:26:04,425 --> 01:26:08,259 As an artist, I want it to come from a truthful place. 1063 01:26:09,130 --> 01:26:12,031 Holy shit. 1064 01:26:15,003 --> 01:26:17,767 - Ferrari. Ferrari. Focus. Listen. - Oh, okay. 1065 01:26:17,972 --> 01:26:20,031 - Are we...? - No, I can do this. Don't worry. 1066 01:26:20,241 --> 01:26:22,209 Think Meryl Streep, Sophie's Choice. 1067 01:26:31,786 --> 01:26:33,083 Hey. 1068 01:26:33,288 --> 01:26:34,755 Hey. 1069 01:26:39,928 --> 01:26:42,453 Next location! Come on, move! 1070 01:26:42,697 --> 01:26:45,257 Move, move, move! Let's go! 1071 01:26:52,006 --> 01:26:54,099 - I gotta be in this. - Shut up. Take this. 1072 01:27:10,191 --> 01:27:12,159 Oh, come on! Take the pain! 1073 01:27:12,360 --> 01:27:13,850 Take the pain! Get up. Come on! 1074 01:27:17,632 --> 01:27:19,293 May I have a word with you? 1075 01:27:20,969 --> 01:27:23,403 - What's up? - I found this in the hallway. 1076 01:27:24,138 --> 01:27:25,435 Do you know what this is? 1077 01:27:26,140 --> 01:27:27,368 No, what is it? 1078 01:27:27,475 --> 01:27:29,807 Looks like a release form for something. 1079 01:27:30,945 --> 01:27:32,776 Yeah, I don't know what it is. 1080 01:27:35,016 --> 01:27:36,984 Have a good night. 1081 01:27:55,169 --> 01:27:56,636 You're strong. 1082 01:27:56,838 --> 01:27:58,362 You're firm. 1083 01:27:58,573 --> 01:28:00,837 But you have a secret. 1084 01:28:01,042 --> 01:28:03,033 Show that to me. 1085 01:28:16,591 --> 01:28:18,456 Thank you. 1086 01:28:18,993 --> 01:28:20,824 For what? 1087 01:28:21,229 --> 01:28:23,254 I never went to prom. 1088 01:28:45,153 --> 01:28:47,121 Excuse me, sir? 1089 01:28:47,789 --> 01:28:49,120 We have a problem. 1090 01:28:51,759 --> 01:28:54,057 - What's wrong? - Derek didn't work out. 1091 01:28:54,429 --> 01:28:56,795 - What happened? - Let's just say he wasn't strong... 1092 01:28:57,031 --> 01:28:58,726 ...or firm. 1093 01:28:58,933 --> 01:29:01,094 Guys, I can't work like this. 1094 01:29:01,302 --> 01:29:03,429 Okay, relax. We'll just get somebody else. 1095 01:29:03,638 --> 01:29:04,332 There is nobody else. 1096 01:29:04,439 --> 01:29:06,737 I thought everyone's dying to be in this. 1097 01:29:06,974 --> 01:29:09,135 Not this scene. 1098 01:29:11,546 --> 01:29:12,808 All right. 1099 01:29:13,047 --> 01:29:15,242 This is the key scene. 1100 01:29:15,450 --> 01:29:18,510 If we don't get this, Hugo's not gonna buy it. 1101 01:29:19,253 --> 01:29:21,721 Yeah, well, somebody's gotta step up. 1102 01:29:21,923 --> 01:29:24,824 - Why are you looking at me? - Because you're doing it. 1103 01:29:25,093 --> 01:29:27,391 Whoa, whoa, Mr. L-Just-Wanna-Bang-Hot-Chicks. 1104 01:29:27,595 --> 01:29:29,790 Here's your first chance. 1105 01:29:30,264 --> 01:29:32,164 Klitz, I can't act and direct, okay? 1106 01:29:32,367 --> 01:29:33,732 Oh, okay, fine. I'll direct. 1107 01:29:33,935 --> 01:29:35,562 - You're a director now? - Yeah, I am. 1108 01:29:35,770 --> 01:29:37,601 Okay, Spielberg, what lens will you use? 1109 01:29:37,839 --> 01:29:39,272 - It's a video camera. - So? 1110 01:29:39,507 --> 01:29:42,237 Dude, you don't need to change the lens on a video camera. 1111 01:29:42,443 --> 01:29:45,412 You know what? Take this camera and shove it up your ass! 1112 01:29:45,613 --> 01:29:47,342 I'll do it. 1113 01:29:50,017 --> 01:29:51,609 I'll do it. 1114 01:29:52,620 --> 01:29:54,918 You guys have been great, but this is my mess. 1115 01:29:55,123 --> 01:29:57,091 - I'll clean it up. - Matt. Matt. 1116 01:29:57,291 --> 01:29:59,782 Your face is gonna be in this. Think about that. 1117 01:30:32,560 --> 01:30:35,461 - Come here, baby. - Let's... 1118 01:30:36,364 --> 01:30:38,195 Picture's up, people. 1119 01:30:50,945 --> 01:30:52,310 Are you ready, hon? 1120 01:30:52,513 --> 01:30:53,810 Yeah. 1121 01:30:54,015 --> 01:30:55,846 Okay, let's do this. 1122 01:31:04,158 --> 01:31:05,989 And... 1123 01:31:06,227 --> 01:31:07,694 ...action. 1124 01:31:11,566 --> 01:31:13,761 What the hell is going on in here? 1125 01:31:17,171 --> 01:31:19,139 - Nobody move! - Oh, shit. 1126 01:31:19,373 --> 01:31:21,136 Who is in charge of this? 1127 01:31:22,777 --> 01:31:24,506 I asked you people a question! 1128 01:31:24,745 --> 01:31:26,770 Who is in charge here?! 1129 01:31:40,728 --> 01:31:42,286 Fuck it. 1130 01:32:12,793 --> 01:32:15,455 All right, everybody, take five. 1131 01:32:16,597 --> 01:32:17,894 What's wrong? 1132 01:32:18,099 --> 01:32:19,760 I can't do this. 1133 01:32:19,967 --> 01:32:21,559 What happened? 1134 01:32:33,548 --> 01:32:35,641 What are you gonna do? 1135 01:32:38,185 --> 01:32:40,244 I don't know. Doesn't matter. 1136 01:32:44,325 --> 01:32:46,259 No. 1137 01:32:46,460 --> 01:32:48,121 I'll do it. 1138 01:32:48,796 --> 01:32:50,423 Klitz, it's cool. You don't have to- 1139 01:32:50,531 --> 01:32:51,998 No, no, I'm doing it. 1140 01:32:53,034 --> 01:32:54,626 Why? 1141 01:32:55,403 --> 01:32:57,598 Because we're a fucking tripod. 1142 01:32:58,973 --> 01:33:01,942 All right, here we go, people. Picture's up. 1143 01:33:03,377 --> 01:33:06,369 Listen, I know this is unprofessional... 1144 01:33:06,581 --> 01:33:08,606 ...but I think you're really cute. 1145 01:33:08,816 --> 01:33:10,477 Yeah, right. 1146 01:33:11,485 --> 01:33:13,476 I'm serious. 1147 01:33:14,288 --> 01:33:15,755 Really cute. 1148 01:33:16,557 --> 01:33:17,819 How we doing, Klitzy? 1149 01:33:19,660 --> 01:33:21,127 Fucking great, man. 1150 01:33:21,329 --> 01:33:22,660 Let's do this. 1151 01:33:23,030 --> 01:33:25,123 And action! 1152 01:34:15,950 --> 01:34:17,542 See you guys. 1153 01:34:19,920 --> 01:34:21,911 Good night, guys. 1154 01:34:27,161 --> 01:34:28,685 So... 1155 01:34:28,896 --> 01:34:31,421 ...what's the craziest thing you've done lately? 1156 01:35:47,174 --> 01:35:49,142 - Hello? - We're dead. 1157 01:35:49,376 --> 01:35:51,640 - Eli? - Dude, the tape's not here. 1158 01:35:51,846 --> 01:35:53,108 - I can't find it. - What? 1159 01:35:53,314 --> 01:35:56,545 Dude, I'm not kidding, okay? I've looked everywhere, okay? 1160 01:35:56,817 --> 01:35:57,613 All right, calm down. 1161 01:35:57,718 --> 01:35:59,618 No, dude, you calm down! It's gone! 1162 01:35:59,854 --> 01:36:02,516 - What do you mean it's gone? - I mean it's freaking gone. 1163 01:36:03,023 --> 01:36:04,854 Somebody stole it! 1164 01:36:05,092 --> 01:36:06,354 Jesus Christ! 1165 01:36:06,460 --> 01:36:07,950 Matthew, could you come in here? 1166 01:36:13,701 --> 01:36:15,862 This is Mr. Simon. 1167 01:36:17,872 --> 01:36:20,966 He says he has something very important to discuss with us. 1168 01:36:25,112 --> 01:36:26,443 Why don't you sit down. 1169 01:36:30,117 --> 01:36:32,312 Actually, if you don't mind... 1170 01:36:32,553 --> 01:36:34,817 ...may I have a word with the boy alone first? 1171 01:36:36,490 --> 01:36:38,014 Sure. 1172 01:36:47,034 --> 01:36:48,262 So how was prom? 1173 01:36:51,238 --> 01:36:53,001 - That's mine. - You know, we were fine. 1174 01:36:53,207 --> 01:36:56,370 But now you go and do this? This was my idea. 1175 01:36:56,577 --> 01:36:58,374 Now I'm really gonna fuck your shit up. 1176 01:36:59,446 --> 01:37:01,073 I'm gonna need that back. 1177 01:37:04,785 --> 01:37:06,184 Take it from me. 1178 01:37:09,790 --> 01:37:11,690 Yeah... 1179 01:37:11,892 --> 01:37:13,860 ...what are you gonna do? 1180 01:37:15,896 --> 01:37:17,261 I don't have to do anything. 1181 01:37:17,965 --> 01:37:19,728 Hugo Posh will. 1182 01:37:19,934 --> 01:37:22,869 Yeah, he's my partner on this, 50-50. 1183 01:37:23,838 --> 01:37:26,306 So could I please have my tape back? 1184 01:37:26,574 --> 01:37:28,371 Fuck you! 1185 01:37:29,410 --> 01:37:31,935 Fuck you. I'm taking your half then. 1186 01:37:32,146 --> 01:37:35,775 No. That money's going to Samnang. The money you stole from him. 1187 01:37:35,983 --> 01:37:39,316 You say that like I care. I don't give a shit. 1188 01:37:39,553 --> 01:37:41,384 You're giving me your half. 1189 01:37:41,822 --> 01:37:43,949 And if I don't? 1190 01:37:44,625 --> 01:37:45,922 Showtime. 1191 01:37:52,499 --> 01:37:55,093 - Okay. - "Okay," what? 1192 01:37:56,604 --> 01:37:58,469 Show them the tape. 1193 01:37:58,772 --> 01:38:00,433 I'm not fucking around. 1194 01:38:02,076 --> 01:38:04,044 I just don't care anymore. 1195 01:38:05,980 --> 01:38:07,447 This... 1196 01:38:07,648 --> 01:38:10,276 ...is gonna be interesting. 1197 01:38:14,121 --> 01:38:16,646 Dan, Marci, Mr. Salinger... 1198 01:38:16,891 --> 01:38:19,985 ...would you mind joining me in the living room for a second? 1199 01:38:20,194 --> 01:38:21,661 Great. 1200 01:38:29,003 --> 01:38:32,666 Matthew, is there anything you want to say before we watch this? 1201 01:38:36,543 --> 01:38:38,636 Okay, then. On with the show. 1202 01:38:42,149 --> 01:38:44,276 Hello. I'm April. 1203 01:38:44,485 --> 01:38:46,043 And I'm Ferrari. 1204 01:38:46,253 --> 01:38:49,882 You may recognize us as stars of the adult entertainment industry. 1205 01:38:50,157 --> 01:38:52,387 And today we're taking time out to talk about... 1206 01:38:52,493 --> 01:38:54,154 ...a very important subject. 1207 01:38:54,361 --> 01:38:55,885 - Sex. - Sex. 1208 01:38:57,031 --> 01:38:59,397 Special events such as senior prom... 1209 01:38:59,500 --> 01:39:00,660 ...place added pressure on young teens... 1210 01:39:00,868 --> 01:39:03,803 ...to lose their virginity and engage in unprotected sex. 1211 01:39:04,038 --> 01:39:06,472 I know I lost my virginity at my senior... 1212 01:39:06,573 --> 01:39:08,473 ...prom. When'd you lose yours, April? 1213 01:39:08,676 --> 01:39:11,645 - When I was 10. - Moving on. 1214 01:39:11,879 --> 01:39:14,347 In this video, we'll go through. 1215 01:39:14,448 --> 01:39:15,972 ...everything from kissing to foreplay. 1216 01:39:16,183 --> 01:39:19,983 And for our finale, we'll show you how to put a condom on properly... 1217 01:39:20,187 --> 01:39:22,348 ...using a real person. 1218 01:39:22,456 --> 01:39:25,050 No cucumbers or bananas in this video. 1219 01:39:25,292 --> 01:39:27,351 So for those of you naughty boys... 1220 01:39:27,461 --> 01:39:29,122 ...expecting to see a raunchy porn video... 1221 01:39:29,563 --> 01:39:32,623 ...you might as well turn this off now... 1222 01:39:32,866 --> 01:39:34,527 ...because you're not gonna see sex. 1223 01:39:34,735 --> 01:39:36,225 What the fuck is this shit? 1224 01:39:36,470 --> 01:39:39,200 You're gonna see sex education. 1225 01:39:41,475 --> 01:39:43,033 The ELI EXPERIENCE presents 1226 01:39:44,445 --> 01:39:47,676 ADULT EDUCATION Sex Education for the 21st Century 1227 01:39:50,718 --> 01:39:52,777 This is interesting, Matthew. 1228 01:39:56,290 --> 01:39:57,587 Yeah. 1229 01:39:57,791 --> 01:40:00,157 Yeah, I think it's a great idea. 1230 01:40:03,564 --> 01:40:06,863 Well, you remember those sex-ed films back in our day. 1231 01:40:07,401 --> 01:40:10,768 Well, I'll tell you, if they were anything like this... 1232 01:40:10,971 --> 01:40:14,065 ...we sure would've paid more attention, don't you think? 1233 01:40:15,776 --> 01:40:17,903 I think it's atrocious. 1234 01:40:20,981 --> 01:40:22,278 But... 1235 01:40:22,483 --> 01:40:24,246 ...the hell with it. 1236 01:40:25,519 --> 01:40:27,885 The kids today are so goddamn screwed up... 1237 01:40:28,088 --> 01:40:31,057 ...maybe this is the only way you can reach them. 1238 01:40:34,094 --> 01:40:36,392 You just might have something here, Matthew. 1239 01:40:36,964 --> 01:40:38,727 I think it's pretty wild. 1240 01:40:39,967 --> 01:40:41,901 This could really sell, don't you think? 1241 01:40:43,337 --> 01:40:45,567 How'd you come up with such an idea, Matthew? 1242 01:40:47,007 --> 01:40:48,304 What can I say? 1243 01:40:49,777 --> 01:40:51,836 It's like a gift, you know? 1244 01:40:52,746 --> 01:40:54,805 It's like I can't control it. 1245 01:40:58,886 --> 01:41:00,148 We've Only. Just Begun. 1246 01:41:03,557 --> 01:41:04,819 YEARBOOKS TODAY! 1247 01:41:05,025 --> 01:41:08,688 Courtney Booth. I will always remember late nights in Cabby... 1248 01:41:08,896 --> 01:41:10,693 Eric Zierdal. I'll always remember... 1249 01:41:10,898 --> 01:41:12,126 Kurt Kilgore. I will... 1250 01:41:12,332 --> 01:41:13,390 Joseph Croft. 1251 01:41:13,500 --> 01:41:16,162 I will always remember wrestling and the great memories we had. 1252 01:41:16,370 --> 01:41:19,498 Matthew Kidman. I will always remember... 1253 01:41:21,909 --> 01:41:24,434 ...the three legs of the tripod. 1254 01:41:24,845 --> 01:41:28,246 I'm here with Hugo Posh, the producer of Adult Education... 1255 01:41:28,482 --> 01:41:31,747 ...the hottest-selling sex-education video ever made... 1256 01:41:31,985 --> 01:41:34,749 ...being utilized in classrooms across the globe. 1257 01:41:34,988 --> 01:41:39,220 Hugo, you're known primarily as a hard-core pornographer, correct? 1258 01:41:39,426 --> 01:41:40,757 My business partner. 1259 01:41:40,994 --> 01:41:42,325 Let me break it down for you 1260 01:41:42,529 --> 01:41:45,692 See, Hugo Posh isn't just tits. He isn't just ass. 1261 01:41:46,733 --> 01:41:50,692 I mean, yes, he is those things, but Hugo Posh is also heart. 1262 01:41:51,205 --> 01:41:53,002 What an ass-bag. 1263 01:41:53,707 --> 01:41:55,299 THE JUICE WAS WORTH THE SQUEEZE 1264 01:41:55,742 --> 01:41:57,835 Fucking kid. 1265 01:41:58,045 --> 01:41:59,842 My student advisor. 1266 01:42:00,047 --> 01:42:02,038 All right, people. 1267 01:42:02,583 --> 01:42:04,016 Let's make some fucky-fucky. 1268 01:42:04,218 --> 01:42:07,016 Now, Hugo, you and your partner have made millions on this. 1269 01:42:07,221 --> 01:42:08,984 So who is this silent partner? 1270 01:42:10,390 --> 01:42:13,359 Well, he prefers to remain anonymous. 1271 01:42:20,968 --> 01:42:23,903 You better cure cancer, kid. 1272 01:42:24,104 --> 01:42:25,799 The next Einstein. 1273 01:42:26,140 --> 01:42:28,005 All right. Yeah, next question. 1274 01:42:29,143 --> 01:42:31,202 - All right. - Eli's calling card. 1275 01:42:31,411 --> 01:42:33,538 - How about you, buddy? - Yeah, Mr. Brooks... 1276 01:42:33,747 --> 01:42:35,840 ...why did you decide to skip film school? 1277 01:42:36,083 --> 01:42:37,914 Don't you think you're a little young? 1278 01:42:38,018 --> 01:42:39,315 Shut the fuck up! 1279 01:42:39,553 --> 01:42:41,043 Next question! Faster! 1280 01:42:41,288 --> 01:42:43,688 I got the tape! Can you see? I got the tape! 1281 01:42:45,759 --> 01:42:47,693 For our finale, I will now demonstrate... 1282 01:42:47,794 --> 01:42:48,692 ...the proper technique... 1283 01:42:48,896 --> 01:42:50,420 ...for putting a condom on the real thing. 1284 01:42:50,531 --> 01:42:52,362 Is my volunteer ready? 1285 01:42:52,566 --> 01:42:54,397 Klitz's big debut. 1286 01:42:54,635 --> 01:42:56,535 Shut up, shut up! Here he is, here he is. 1287 01:43:04,144 --> 01:43:06,840 Jesus, look at that guy. 1288 01:43:07,681 --> 01:43:10,445 He is huge. 1289 01:43:15,122 --> 01:43:18,489 My own scholarship to Georgetown. 1290 01:43:23,130 --> 01:43:25,758 And of course, I'll never forget... 1291 01:43:25,966 --> 01:43:27,297 ...the girl next door. 1292 01:43:35,275 --> 01:43:37,300 As for me... 1293 01:43:38,111 --> 01:43:40,579 ...l'm just going with it. 1294 01:43:40,579 --> 01:44:00,579 Text Fix & Ripp Bj�rn 0 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.moviesubtitles.org 93637