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1
00:00:06,777 --> 00:00:08,777
Tony, I've got
a great idea for what
we can do this Saturday!
2
00:00:08,779 --> 00:00:10,739
I bet we're thinking
the same thing!
3
00:00:10,741 --> 00:00:13,511
Art museum.
Go bowling.
4
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:16,394
Okay, you know
I love going bowling
with you
5
00:00:16,387 --> 00:00:20,347
and eating hot wings
while inhaling
shoe disinfectant,
6
00:00:20,351 --> 00:00:22,351
but we just
went bowling
last weekend.
7
00:00:22,353 --> 00:00:24,603
Because the weekend before
we went to The Met.
8
00:00:24,595 --> 00:00:29,155
Which, by the way,
had nothing to do
with the actual Mets!
9
00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:31,630
Yeah, I'm sorry you had
to walk around the museum
with a baseball mitt,
10
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:33,032
but I did buy
you peanuts.
11
00:00:34,805 --> 00:00:36,205
So, you want to
grab some lunch?
12
00:00:36,207 --> 00:00:37,767
As nice as
that sounds, I can't.
13
00:00:37,768 --> 00:00:40,268
I'm stuck training
some new doorman named Vic
14
00:00:40,271 --> 00:00:41,671
who probably can't
tell "push" from "pull"
15
00:00:41,672 --> 00:00:43,212
Is that really
a problem?
16
00:00:43,214 --> 00:00:44,384
You'd be surprised.
17
00:00:44,375 --> 00:00:47,075
Look at the hinges people.
Look at the hinges!
18
00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:51,419
Yo, Tony, it's me,
your new doorman!
19
00:00:55,426 --> 00:00:58,126
Uh-oh.
20
00:00:58,129 --> 00:01:01,259
I'm Vicky Montesano,
Theresa's little sister.
21
00:01:01,262 --> 00:01:03,492
You probably don't
recognize me since
I lost the braces
22
00:01:03,494 --> 00:01:06,104
and had the nostril
reduction surgery.
23
00:01:06,097 --> 00:01:07,397
Better, see?
24
00:01:09,700 --> 00:01:13,370
Holy cannoli!
Little Vicky?
25
00:01:13,374 --> 00:01:17,754
Now I remember! I can still
picture you in your
Catholic school uniform!
26
00:01:17,748 --> 00:01:20,778
(CHUCKLES)
Okay, you can stop
doing that now.
27
00:01:22,683 --> 00:01:24,123
Hi, I'm Vic.
28
00:01:24,115 --> 00:01:26,185
Tony and me
go way back.
29
00:01:26,187 --> 00:01:29,117
Hi, I'm Jessie.
Tony and I go out.
30
00:01:30,861 --> 00:01:32,721
They're going to snap
him like a wishbone.
31
00:01:34,665 --> 00:01:38,625
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh
32
00:01:38,629 --> 00:01:42,399
♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie
33
00:01:42,403 --> 00:01:45,843
♪ It feels like a party
every day
34
00:01:45,836 --> 00:01:49,406
♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie
35
00:01:49,410 --> 00:01:53,110
♪ But they keep on pulling
me every which way
36
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:56,323
♪ Hey Jessie, hey Jessie
37
00:01:56,317 --> 00:01:59,817
♪ My whole world is changing
Turning around
38
00:01:59,820 --> 00:02:02,750
♪ They got me going crazy
Yeah, they're shaking
the ground
39
00:02:02,753 --> 00:02:07,603
♪ But they took a chance
on the new girl in town
40
00:02:07,598 --> 00:02:11,128
♪ And I don't want to let them
down, down, down
41
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:11,801
♪ Hey Jessie
42
00:02:14,405 --> 00:02:15,665
♪ Hey Jessie
43
00:02:18,169 --> 00:02:21,769
♪ It feels like a party
every day
44
00:02:21,772 --> 00:02:24,782
♪ Hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, Jessie ♪
45
00:02:35,426 --> 00:02:37,356
What are you guys making?
46
00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:38,488
Toast.
47
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:42,590
And my doctor
wonders why I'm tense.
48
00:02:42,593 --> 00:02:44,573
He says my stress levels
are somewhere between
49
00:02:44,565 --> 00:02:47,865
"Getaway Driver"
and "Shark Whisperer."
50
00:02:47,868 --> 00:02:51,868
Bertram, if you are serious
about getting healthier,
maybe we can help you.
51
00:02:51,872 --> 00:02:54,512
Really?
Aw, I'm touched
that you care.
52
00:02:54,505 --> 00:02:57,475
Hey, we don't want anything
to happen to the guy
who buys our food.
53
00:02:59,250 --> 00:03:01,810
And we care.
(CHUCKLES)
54
00:03:01,812 --> 00:03:05,362
Well, anything you guys
come up with will
better than my plan
55
00:03:05,356 --> 00:03:05,956
which is to buy,
bigger pants.
56
00:03:10,221 --> 00:03:10,861
Do they make
bigger pants?
57
00:03:16,597 --> 00:03:18,227
Hey, girls.
58
00:03:18,229 --> 00:03:19,529
Vic, why don't
you go sort the mail?
59
00:03:19,530 --> 00:03:22,470
You got it.
60
00:03:22,473 --> 00:03:24,413
If I get a paper cut
will you kiss it and
make it feel better?
61
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:28,276
There's a first aid kit.
62
00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:30,680
Vic is doing
great. I mean,
63
00:03:30,681 --> 00:03:33,541
she's really fitting in.
64
00:03:33,544 --> 00:03:36,754
Especially into her uniform.
Really shows off her...
65
00:03:36,747 --> 00:03:38,247
Epaulets.
66
00:03:38,249 --> 00:03:40,719
VIC: Tony, can
you give me a hand?
67
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,821
Sure, Vic.
(GASPS)
68
00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:44,603
I forgot it was
catalog day!
69
00:03:44,595 --> 00:03:47,295
Lift with your legs!
70
00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:51,430
Jessie, aren't
you worried about this?
71
00:03:51,432 --> 00:03:52,862
Of course not!
72
00:03:52,863 --> 00:03:55,743
They're gonna be
in that little room
together, lifting...
73
00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:57,006
With their legs!
74
00:03:58,339 --> 00:04:01,609
Look, I totally
trust Tony.
75
00:04:01,612 --> 00:04:03,872
Now let's go to
the park and pray.
I mean, play.
76
00:04:07,648 --> 00:04:10,548
Meditation can help
you reduce your stress.
77
00:04:10,551 --> 00:04:11,851
Begin by clearing
your mind.
78
00:04:16,457 --> 00:04:17,627
(TV BLARING)
79
00:04:18,989 --> 00:04:22,359
I said clear your mind,
not the DVR.
80
00:04:22,363 --> 00:04:24,573
But I want to watch
Extreme Crafting Death Match.
81
00:04:24,565 --> 00:04:27,795
I love when
they do battle in
the Yarn Barn.
82
00:04:28,899 --> 00:04:31,569
No! Now, concentrate
on your breathing.
83
00:04:31,572 --> 00:04:34,412
In through your nose,
84
00:04:34,405 --> 00:04:36,275
out through your mouth.
85
00:04:38,979 --> 00:04:40,009
(GAGGING)
86
00:04:41,952 --> 00:04:44,662
Oh, what is that
horrible smell?
87
00:04:44,655 --> 00:04:47,055
Perhaps you relaxed
a little too much.
88
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:52,961
(GAGS)
Okay,
89
00:04:52,963 --> 00:04:55,503
there's no bigger
fan of sitting and
doing nothing than me,
90
00:04:55,496 --> 00:04:57,026
but I can't take
this awful stench!
91
00:04:58,929 --> 00:05:01,329
What is that awful aroma?
92
00:05:01,332 --> 00:05:02,872
(SNIFFING)
(COUGHING)
93
00:05:06,036 --> 00:05:07,706
Luke,
94
00:05:07,708 --> 00:05:09,908
why are you spreading
your stench?
95
00:05:09,910 --> 00:05:13,710
Because your mumbo jumbo
is not going to help Bertram
get rid of his stress.
96
00:05:13,714 --> 00:05:16,624
Oh, so you think you
have a better idea?
97
00:05:16,617 --> 00:05:18,747
Always.
98
00:05:18,749 --> 00:05:21,889
What Bertram needs
is exercise. You know,
to work up a sweat.
99
00:05:21,892 --> 00:05:25,932
Smells like you have
worked up enough
for both of you!
100
00:05:25,926 --> 00:05:27,096
It's a gift!
101
00:05:32,463 --> 00:05:33,903
Jessie,
102
00:05:33,904 --> 00:05:35,774
remember you told me
about a guy you dated
in high school
103
00:05:35,766 --> 00:05:36,906
named Ted Hoover?
104
00:05:36,907 --> 00:05:39,707
Sure, he's the only guy
I ever dumped.
105
00:05:39,710 --> 00:05:41,370
You dumped him?
106
00:05:41,372 --> 00:05:42,942
What kind of horrific,
troll beast was he?
107
00:05:44,945 --> 00:05:48,845
He wasn't a troll.
He was just
108
00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:50,679
a heavy, hairy
in the wrong places,
109
00:05:50,681 --> 00:05:53,121
slightly smelly
toll booth attendant
at our local bridge.
110
00:05:54,925 --> 00:05:58,955
Oh, my gosh,
he might actually
have been a troll.
111
00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:01,829
Well, I went on
FacePage and found
his profile pic.
112
00:06:01,832 --> 00:06:04,572
He's changed.
And he's in town.
113
00:06:04,565 --> 00:06:07,135
So I invited him
over so you can
make Tony jealous.
114
00:06:07,137 --> 00:06:10,667
(SCOFFS) That won't work,
not unless Ted
has changed a lot.
115
00:06:10,671 --> 00:06:12,371
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
116
00:06:16,807 --> 00:06:17,907
Jessie!
117
00:06:17,908 --> 00:06:20,478
Ted?
You've changed a lot!
118
00:06:23,914 --> 00:06:28,524
If he's the troll,
I'm crossing that
bridge every day.
119
00:06:28,519 --> 00:06:30,389
Yeah, after you
broke up with me,
120
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,390
I started working out
and losing weight.
121
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,702
Plus, I, uh, got
the hump removed.
122
00:06:35,696 --> 00:06:38,826
I was gonna say,
who did your hump work?
'Cause it looks fantastic!
123
00:06:40,501 --> 00:06:43,071
I'm Zuri.
Hug me.
124
00:06:43,634 --> 00:06:46,044
Okay.
125
00:06:46,036 --> 00:06:48,506
Sorry. When Zuri
sees something she
wants, she goes for it.
126
00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:50,409
(GRUNTS)
127
00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:52,981
So, Ted,
128
00:06:52,983 --> 00:06:55,953
are you in town for
some kind of International
Handsome Man Convention?
129
00:06:58,519 --> 00:07:00,049
Zuri, that's just silly.
130
00:07:00,050 --> 00:07:02,920
Ooh, no, she's right.
I'm a model now,
131
00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:05,603
and the IHMC is
great for networking.
132
00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:11,028
Well, you guys obviously
have a lot to catch up on.
133
00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:13,461
Right, so we should
go to lunch.
134
00:07:13,464 --> 00:07:15,544
Through the lobby.
Past the doorman.
135
00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:17,606
Okay, however
you get to the street.
136
00:07:21,472 --> 00:07:24,042
Great plan, Emma.
137
00:07:24,044 --> 00:07:26,924
How did Jessie ever
keep a man before us?
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
138
00:07:26,917 --> 00:07:27,977
She didn't.
139
00:07:27,978 --> 00:07:29,148
Oh, right.
140
00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:42,490
Twelve minutes.
Not bad for a mile.
141
00:07:42,493 --> 00:07:44,843
You were running
the 100 yard dash!
142
00:07:46,096 --> 00:07:49,196
And you stopped
at a hot dog cart.
143
00:07:49,199 --> 00:07:49,969
Now let's do
some chin-ups.
144
00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:52,470
(GROANING)
145
00:07:58,779 --> 00:07:59,779
Okay, your turn.
146
00:07:59,780 --> 00:08:02,250
You've got
to be kidding.
147
00:08:02,252 --> 00:08:03,852
We could do
some more running.
148
00:08:03,854 --> 00:08:04,724
Upsy daisy!
149
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:09,058
(STRAINING)
(METAL CREAKING)
150
00:08:10,991 --> 00:08:12,561
Just a moment.
151
00:08:15,796 --> 00:08:17,066
(GROANS)
152
00:08:17,067 --> 00:08:18,897
Bertram, are you okay?
153
00:08:18,899 --> 00:08:20,699
No, I need some ice.
154
00:08:23,173 --> 00:08:25,683
Maybe the snow cone
guy will let me
sit on his cart.
155
00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:30,708
Well, well, well.
156
00:08:30,711 --> 00:08:33,641
Can someone
not handle his
fitness bit-ness?
157
00:08:33,644 --> 00:08:37,094
Please never say
"bit-ness" again.
158
00:08:37,688 --> 00:08:39,148
Hey...
159
00:08:39,149 --> 00:08:41,249
Did you sabotage
this bar?
Maybe.
160
00:08:41,251 --> 00:08:45,561
Just like your foul
underarm odor ruined
my meditation session.
161
00:08:45,556 --> 00:08:47,756
Because it
was pointless!
162
00:08:47,758 --> 00:08:50,898
My plan for Bertram
will work.
163
00:08:53,003 --> 00:08:54,913
Maybe.
164
00:08:59,209 --> 00:09:01,909
(BOTH LAUGHING)
165
00:09:01,912 --> 00:09:04,882
Hey, Tony.
Look who dropped by.
My ex-boyfriend, Ted.
166
00:09:04,875 --> 00:09:06,645
Try to keep calm.
167
00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:08,747
Don't fly into
a jealous rage.
168
00:09:09,620 --> 00:09:11,020
Hey, Ted.
169
00:09:11,021 --> 00:09:12,951
Nice boots.
Ah, thanks, man.
170
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:15,964
Well.
That was a letdown.
171
00:09:17,287 --> 00:09:19,627
Don't worry,
I got this.
172
00:09:20,691 --> 00:09:24,671
Fight! Fight!
Fight! Fight!
(MUFFLED)
173
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:31,198
Now, to be hypnotized,
just concentrate
on this watch
174
00:09:31,201 --> 00:09:33,741
as I count
backwards from three.
Three...
175
00:09:33,744 --> 00:09:34,914
This is so stupid.
Two.
176
00:09:34,905 --> 00:09:37,975
Don't you have to be
weak-minded for
this to work?
177
00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:39,008
One.
(SNORING)
178
00:09:40,781 --> 00:09:42,651
Yes.
Yes, you do.
179
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:48,064
From now on, you will
no longer enjoy
the taste of apple pie,
180
00:09:48,058 --> 00:09:52,258
butter, chocolate,
donuts, egg creams,
French fries...
181
00:09:52,262 --> 00:09:57,332
Toffee cake,
upside-down cake,
vanilla cake,
182
00:09:57,327 --> 00:09:59,767
or anything
that ends in
"whiz."
183
00:10:00,871 --> 00:10:02,101
No whiz.
184
00:10:03,934 --> 00:10:05,984
Very good.
185
00:10:05,976 --> 00:10:07,976
I will now bring you out
of your trance with
the ring of a bell.
186
00:10:10,310 --> 00:10:13,040
As soon as
I find the bell.
187
00:10:13,043 --> 00:10:17,193
Stay put. Do not give me
the Freudian slip!
(LAUGHS)
188
00:10:17,187 --> 00:10:19,047
Oh, hypnotism humor.
189
00:10:20,821 --> 00:10:22,091
Tough room.
190
00:10:27,828 --> 00:10:30,798
(IMITATING RAVI)
Whenever someone
says "Bertram,"
191
00:10:30,801 --> 00:10:34,871
you will act like a cat,
until someone says
your name again.
192
00:10:34,865 --> 00:10:36,735
This hypnotic suggestion
was brought to you by Ravi.
193
00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:44,372
Ah, there it is.
Silly me.
194
00:10:45,075 --> 00:10:46,175
(RINGING)
195
00:10:47,678 --> 00:10:49,318
So, how do
you feel, Bertram?
196
00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:50,680
Meow.
197
00:10:56,787 --> 00:10:57,757
What is the matter, Bertram?
198
00:10:59,329 --> 00:11:02,059
Nothing.
I feel great.
199
00:11:03,964 --> 00:11:05,274
'Sup, Bertram?
200
00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:06,765
(HISSING)
201
00:11:09,199 --> 00:11:11,239
Cat got your tongue?
202
00:11:11,241 --> 00:11:12,671
Luke, what did you do?
203
00:11:14,845 --> 00:11:16,175
Stop it, Bertram!
204
00:11:18,248 --> 00:11:20,678
Why am I cutting
your kurta?
205
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,910
Because Luke exploited
your hypnotic state
206
00:11:22,913 --> 00:11:24,723
to make you act
like a cat!
207
00:11:24,715 --> 00:11:27,685
Because you
sabotaged all
my exercise sessions!
208
00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,917
What are you guys
talking about?
209
00:11:29,920 --> 00:11:31,690
Well, Luke and I
210
00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:33,321
disagreed about how
to help you manage
your stress.
211
00:11:33,323 --> 00:11:38,073
And I guess we kind
of got carried away trying
to prove who was right.
212
00:11:38,068 --> 00:11:40,298
What?
213
00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:42,930
I thought you guys
really cared about me,
214
00:11:42,933 --> 00:11:45,083
obviously I was wrong.
215
00:11:45,075 --> 00:11:46,975
We're really sorry...
216
00:11:46,977 --> 00:11:48,037
Bertram.
217
00:11:48,038 --> 00:11:49,108
Meow.
218
00:11:58,348 --> 00:12:00,088
(TED LAUGHING)
219
00:12:00,090 --> 00:12:00,450
You know what,
Jessie, I am having
a really great time.
220
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:02,791
Not for long.
221
00:12:05,495 --> 00:12:07,725
So, what's it like
being a male model?
222
00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,797
Awesome!
223
00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:11,800
These runway shows pay
you a fortune to walk
around, wear clothes,
224
00:12:11,802 --> 00:12:15,072
and look good,
which I was totally
doing anyway!
225
00:12:16,366 --> 00:12:18,506
You know, I can't
talk to Tony
about fashion.
226
00:12:18,508 --> 00:12:22,368
He thinks an ankle boot
is something you wear when
you're under house arrest.
227
00:12:22,372 --> 00:12:23,912
Oh, whoa. Don't move.
228
00:12:23,914 --> 00:12:24,954
You've got a ladybug
on your shoulder.
229
00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:27,045
You know those
are good luck, right?
230
00:12:32,983 --> 00:12:34,223
Apparently, not for me.
231
00:12:34,224 --> 00:12:36,994
Here, take my jacket.
No, really, I'm...
232
00:12:36,987 --> 00:12:37,987
Whoa.
233
00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:41,028
Uh. I mean,
234
00:12:41,031 --> 00:12:43,791
no, I'm arm enough.
Warm! Warm enough!
235
00:12:45,535 --> 00:12:47,095
Oh, man!
236
00:12:47,097 --> 00:12:48,367
If Jessie's mindless
babbling can't
ruin this date,
237
00:12:48,368 --> 00:12:51,038
what hope do I have?
238
00:12:52,873 --> 00:12:55,953
Zuri, don't you have
anything better to do
than watch us eat?
239
00:12:55,946 --> 00:12:58,076
I'm eight.
I've got nothing
but time,
240
00:12:58,078 --> 00:13:02,948
and according to
my teacher, a very
poor attitude.
241
00:13:02,953 --> 00:13:04,383
So, where's
your girlfriend?
242
00:13:04,384 --> 00:13:06,824
Off having lunch
with some hunky hayseed.
243
00:13:06,817 --> 00:13:10,057
I've never said this
about anyone before,
244
00:13:10,060 --> 00:13:11,820
but I think he may
have better hair
than me.
245
00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:15,333
No way!
246
00:13:15,325 --> 00:13:17,565
And if she likes
that guy more than you,
she's nuts!
247
00:13:17,567 --> 00:13:20,097
You're perfect!
Jessie doesn't think so.
248
00:13:20,100 --> 00:13:21,370
She says
I spend too much
time bowling.
249
00:13:21,371 --> 00:13:24,071
What?
How dare she!
250
00:13:24,074 --> 00:13:28,114
Bowling is
the national sport
of Brooklyn!
251
00:13:28,108 --> 00:13:31,108
After running from
the cops.
(BOTH LAUGH)
252
00:13:31,111 --> 00:13:32,141
And remember what
your grandma always
used to say.
253
00:13:32,142 --> 00:13:35,092
"Sorry, I had cabbage"?
254
00:13:35,085 --> 00:13:38,915
Yeah, but also,
"L'amore non trovare
un difetto...
255
00:13:39,389 --> 00:13:41,289
"L'amore cieco."
256
00:13:41,291 --> 00:13:46,001
They're bonding
in Italian?
Mamma mia, it's go time!
257
00:13:47,958 --> 00:13:49,158
(BARKING)
258
00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:53,431
TONY: Aw, man!
259
00:13:53,433 --> 00:13:54,873
My meatball sub
got munched by a mutt!
260
00:13:54,865 --> 00:13:59,365
Darn! Guess your
cozy little lunch
is ruined.
261
00:13:59,369 --> 00:14:01,169
Better get back
to work, Tony.
262
00:14:01,171 --> 00:14:03,311
Oh, here, Tone, we can just
share my pasta.
263
00:14:05,575 --> 00:14:08,375
You were supposed
to take the pasta, too!
264
00:14:08,378 --> 00:14:10,048
I am so disappointed
in you guys.
265
00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:11,920
(WHINING)
266
00:14:17,127 --> 00:14:18,227
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
267
00:14:20,230 --> 00:14:23,060
Good afternoon,
Miss Prescott. Delivery.
268
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:25,473
(GLASS SHATTERING)
269
00:14:26,897 --> 00:14:28,597
There goes
my stained glass
window kit.
270
00:14:30,540 --> 00:14:32,300
What's wrong with you?
271
00:14:32,302 --> 00:14:35,212
Nothing's wrong.
How was your lunch
with G.Q. McCowboy?
272
00:14:36,476 --> 00:14:37,546
Aha!
273
00:14:37,547 --> 00:14:39,507
You're jealous that
I had lunch with Ted.
274
00:14:39,509 --> 00:14:41,909
I didn't have time to
be jealous, because
I was having lunch with Vic.
275
00:14:41,912 --> 00:14:44,282
What do you think
about that?
276
00:14:44,284 --> 00:14:47,094
I think she seems like
a very nice girl.
277
00:14:47,087 --> 00:14:50,017
I'm sure she has
a heart as big
as her hair.
278
00:14:50,020 --> 00:14:51,590
Aha! You're jealous!
279
00:14:51,591 --> 00:14:53,121
Oh, please, I'm not
that immature.
280
00:14:53,123 --> 00:14:54,623
You can be friends
with anyone you want.
281
00:14:54,624 --> 00:14:57,374
Thanks, I will.
In fact, why don't
we all be very mature
282
00:14:57,367 --> 00:14:59,627
and have dinner together?
One big sophisticated
group of friends.
283
00:14:59,629 --> 00:15:02,569
Fine by me.
We'll have it
at my place.
284
00:15:02,572 --> 00:15:03,902
I'll use the good china.
285
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:07,243
You mean styrofoam?
Yes, I mean styrofoam.
286
00:15:07,237 --> 00:15:08,137
Excellent.
I look forward to it.
287
00:15:08,138 --> 00:15:09,638
As do I.
288
00:15:15,145 --> 00:15:19,385
Sorry, I need you to sign
for that package.
Oh, right yeah!
289
00:15:27,998 --> 00:15:28,698
(ELEVATOR DINGS)
290
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:31,660
Hey.
291
00:15:31,661 --> 00:15:34,061
How did your follow-up
doctor's appointment go?
292
00:15:34,064 --> 00:15:35,644
Like you guys care.
293
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:39,305
Oh, we do!
And we really
want to apologize.
294
00:15:39,309 --> 00:15:41,539
All we wanted to do
was see who could
help you the most.
295
00:15:41,541 --> 00:15:43,271
So, when you think
about it,
296
00:15:43,273 --> 00:15:45,653
we only hurt you
because we
care too much.
297
00:15:47,377 --> 00:15:49,717
That makes no sense.
298
00:15:49,719 --> 00:15:52,449
But I guess
I forgive you.
299
00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:55,662
Thank you!
So, what did
your doctor say?
300
00:15:55,655 --> 00:16:00,285
He said thanks to you two,
my stress levels are even
higher than before,
301
00:16:00,290 --> 00:16:02,190
so he gave me
a new prescription.
302
00:16:02,192 --> 00:16:03,662
To meditate?
To exercise?
303
00:16:03,663 --> 00:16:05,173
Neither.
304
00:16:05,165 --> 00:16:08,295
"Stay 50 feet away
from children
at all times."
305
00:16:08,298 --> 00:16:10,668
Doctors' orders.
306
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,441
But...
Back up.
307
00:16:13,443 --> 00:16:15,113
Back up.
308
00:16:15,105 --> 00:16:16,645
Back. Back. Back.
Back. Back. Back.
Back. Back. Back. Back.
309
00:16:21,381 --> 00:16:23,651
Hello?
It's cold out here!
310
00:16:23,653 --> 00:16:26,693
So, work up
a sweat exercising.
311
00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:30,116
Or, meditate
until you believe
you're warm.
312
00:16:30,120 --> 00:16:31,420
(CHUCKLING)
313
00:16:35,665 --> 00:16:38,025
Anyone want
another Panini?
314
00:16:38,028 --> 00:16:39,328
(SIZZLING)
315
00:16:40,770 --> 00:16:45,000
No, thanks.
My last one was
a little linty.
316
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:46,614
This is a real
nice apartment, Tone.
317
00:16:46,606 --> 00:16:49,606
And your neighbors
are so friendly!
318
00:16:49,609 --> 00:16:52,239
Even the muggers
have manners.
319
00:16:52,242 --> 00:16:54,742
Yeah, it's always nice
to hear "please" before
someone takes your wallet.
320
00:16:56,786 --> 00:16:58,216
I'm glad
you like it, Vic.
321
00:16:58,218 --> 00:17:00,388
Some people
don't appreciate it.
322
00:17:00,390 --> 00:17:03,150
Just because it doesn't
have fancy things
like a doorman
323
00:17:03,153 --> 00:17:08,333
or air conditioning
or a way to escape
in the event of a fire.
324
00:17:08,328 --> 00:17:10,498
Well, excuse me for
thinking you shouldn't
live in a neighborhood
325
00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:12,700
called Murdertown.
326
00:17:12,702 --> 00:17:14,362
It's not called
"Murdertown!"
327
00:17:14,364 --> 00:17:16,674
It's "The Historic
Murdertown District."
328
00:17:18,668 --> 00:17:21,108
Hey, you got
a little something.
329
00:17:24,174 --> 00:17:25,684
Hey, Ted, you got
a little something, too.
330
00:17:29,479 --> 00:17:31,549
Oh, ow!
Oh, whoa!
What's the matter?
331
00:17:31,551 --> 00:17:34,651
Oh, I think
I just cut myself
on your cheekbones.
332
00:17:39,329 --> 00:17:41,059
Okay, something's
wrong here.
333
00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:42,690
Why would
you say that, Ted?
334
00:17:42,692 --> 00:17:45,402
There's nothing wrong with
my girlfriend obsessing over
her supermodel ex.
335
00:17:45,395 --> 00:17:47,065
Or with my boyfriend
taking hours
336
00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:49,766
to teach his beautiful
protegee how to
open a ding-dang door!
337
00:17:51,201 --> 00:17:53,141
You've never
understood my work!
338
00:17:53,143 --> 00:17:55,283
Opening doors is an art!
339
00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:56,645
No, it's not! It's something
we all do to keep from
running into walls!
340
00:17:58,778 --> 00:18:02,648
Oh, look, Tony left
the oven open!
341
00:18:02,652 --> 00:18:04,382
Don't close it.
That's the central heating.
342
00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:07,164
(CRASHING)
(GROANS)
343
00:18:08,818 --> 00:18:11,418
What are you two
doing here?
344
00:18:11,421 --> 00:18:14,091
Keeping you
and Tony from making
a huge mistake!
345
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:15,303
We're in this
relationship, too,
you know!
346
00:18:15,295 --> 00:18:17,595
Okay, I haven't been
this confused since
347
00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:20,567
that modeling shoot for
reversible underwear.
348
00:18:20,570 --> 00:18:22,830
I still don't know if
I had them on inside out.
349
00:18:24,174 --> 00:18:26,414
You're lucky
you're pretty.
350
00:18:26,406 --> 00:18:29,476
Very pretty.
351
00:18:29,479 --> 00:18:31,709
Jessie, may I speak with
you in the living room?
Absolutely.
352
00:18:36,816 --> 00:18:38,416
Why are you acting
this way?
353
00:18:38,418 --> 00:18:39,888
What way?
I'm not acting in a way!
354
00:18:39,889 --> 00:18:42,319
If anyone's acting
in a way, it's you!
355
00:18:42,322 --> 00:18:44,692
Well, if you don't like
the way I act, maybe you
should just go out with Ted!
356
00:18:46,856 --> 00:18:48,496
Maybe I should!
357
00:18:48,498 --> 00:18:49,628
He and I have
a lot more in
common than we do.
358
00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:52,599
And if you think
I don't understand you,
359
00:18:52,602 --> 00:18:54,232
why don't you
just go out
with Vic?
360
00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:55,444
Done!
361
00:18:55,435 --> 00:18:58,465
Whoa, Tony, hold
your hair gel!
362
00:18:58,468 --> 00:19:00,368
I did want
to date you,
363
00:19:00,370 --> 00:19:02,770
but now that I see
what a jealous mook
you are, forget about it.
364
00:19:04,474 --> 00:19:06,484
And Jessie, you didn't
seem so interested
365
00:19:06,476 --> 00:19:09,146
when I looked like
a "before" picture.
(SIGHS)
366
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:12,618
Plus, you dumped
me by texting my mom!
367
00:19:12,622 --> 00:19:15,432
I wanted you to hear
it from someone
who actually cared about you!
368
00:19:16,386 --> 00:19:19,226
I'm not making
it better, am I?
369
00:19:19,229 --> 00:19:21,759
Yikes, that is
a bad way
to dump someone.
370
00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:24,761
And that's coming from
a girl who was once
literally dumped...
371
00:19:24,764 --> 00:19:25,704
Out of the back
of a truck.
372
00:19:28,638 --> 00:19:30,798
That is no way
to treat a lady.
373
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:32,370
Hey,
374
00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:35,412
you want to let these
guys duke it out
and go grab some fro-yo?
375
00:19:35,405 --> 00:19:36,805
Okay!
376
00:19:36,806 --> 00:19:39,746
I know a great,
cheap place on
the corner.
377
00:19:39,749 --> 00:19:41,949
We just got to duck
the police tape.
378
00:19:41,951 --> 00:19:44,411
Sweet. Oh, and
don't worry about money.
379
00:19:44,414 --> 00:19:47,294
When you're as pretty
as me, you never
have to pay for stuff.
380
00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,520
I did not see
that coming.
381
00:19:53,893 --> 00:19:57,633
Okay, you guys obviously
need your privacy.
382
00:19:57,627 --> 00:19:58,667
We'll wait in
the bathroom.
383
00:20:02,572 --> 00:20:03,772
(SIGHS)
Jessie,
384
00:20:03,773 --> 00:20:07,583
what are we doing?
This isn't us.
385
00:20:07,577 --> 00:20:09,307
Well, it wasn't us.
386
00:20:09,309 --> 00:20:10,379
But,
387
00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:11,840
the truth is,
388
00:20:11,841 --> 00:20:13,741
things just haven't
been the same lately.
389
00:20:15,785 --> 00:20:19,485
Have you felt that too?
Actually, yeah.
390
00:20:19,489 --> 00:20:21,649
I used to love doing
things I hate with you.
391
00:20:21,651 --> 00:20:23,751
Me too!
392
00:20:23,753 --> 00:20:26,763
But now I have to fight the
urge to throw your bowling
ball through a windshield!
393
00:20:26,756 --> 00:20:31,526
And if I have to watch a movie
with subtitles one more time,
I'll puke in my popcorn!
394
00:20:31,531 --> 00:20:32,701
If I want to read,
I'll pick up a comic book!
395
00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:36,944
So...
396
00:20:37,867 --> 00:20:40,937
I guess the spark
is kind of gone.
397
00:20:43,012 --> 00:20:44,272
Kind of.
398
00:20:47,647 --> 00:20:49,677
Look, the truth is,
I was attracted to Ted.
399
00:20:50,350 --> 00:20:51,780
Do you hate me?
400
00:20:53,523 --> 00:20:55,793
Actually, no.
401
00:20:55,785 --> 00:20:58,255
Because if I'm being
honest, I had feelings
for Vic, too.
402
00:20:58,257 --> 00:21:00,387
(SIGHS)
403
00:21:01,531 --> 00:21:06,041
So, what do we do now?
404
00:21:06,035 --> 00:21:10,765
I don't know.
I mean, if we're
noticing other people,
405
00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:13,670
maybe it's a sign
that we should see
other people.
406
00:21:13,673 --> 00:21:17,013
And maybe even
date 'em.
407
00:21:17,006 --> 00:21:18,876
I guess that's what you...
That's what I meant
when I said...
408
00:21:20,710 --> 00:21:21,680
So...
409
00:21:22,782 --> 00:21:23,782
Are we breaking up?
410
00:21:25,955 --> 00:21:28,455
I guess so.
411
00:21:29,389 --> 00:21:31,359
(SIGHS)
412
00:21:31,361 --> 00:21:33,891
And I will
always love you.
413
00:21:33,893 --> 00:21:36,003
I'll always love you, too.
414
00:21:35,995 --> 00:21:37,995
Friends, right?
Absolutely!
415
00:21:38,928 --> 00:21:40,568
Friends.
Always.
416
00:21:41,571 --> 00:21:43,071
(BLOWING NOSES)
417
00:21:43,072 --> 00:21:43,932
(SOBBING HYSTERICALLY)
418
00:21:43,933 --> 00:21:46,483
How could you
do this to us?
419
00:21:46,476 --> 00:21:49,436
I feel like I've been
kicked in the gut!
420
00:21:49,439 --> 00:21:52,009
And you couldn't
have sprung for two-ply?
421
00:21:54,884 --> 00:21:58,894
Girls, come here,
it'll be okay.
422
00:21:58,888 --> 00:22:01,518
Look, soon, this will all
be just another one
of my break-up stories
423
00:22:01,521 --> 00:22:04,051
that I tell over
and over and over.
424
00:22:04,053 --> 00:22:06,403
(BOTH SOBBING HYSTERICALLY)
425
00:22:06,396 --> 00:22:08,056
Okay, I get it.
426
00:22:08,057 --> 00:22:10,857
This may be the wrong
time to mention this,
427
00:22:10,860 --> 00:22:13,400
but there's definitely
something swimming
in this toilet.
428
00:22:13,403 --> 00:22:15,373
(SQUEAKING)
(ALL SCREAM)
429
00:22:18,708 --> 00:22:21,668
So, Ted and Vic
ended up together,
430
00:22:21,671 --> 00:22:24,841
Tony and I broke up,
and to top it all off,
431
00:22:24,844 --> 00:22:25,784
I had to fish a rat
out of the toilet!
432
00:22:27,877 --> 00:22:31,547
Still sounds like one
of your better dates.
433
00:22:31,551 --> 00:22:35,051
Sympathetic as always,
but thanks you for
listening, Bertram.
434
00:22:35,655 --> 00:22:37,385
Meow.
435
00:22:39,589 --> 00:22:41,989
Okay, you can stop
listening now!
436
00:22:41,991 --> 00:22:43,531
What is wrong with
you, Bertram?
437
00:22:45,735 --> 00:22:47,065
I'm sorry, you were
saying something?
438
00:22:48,798 --> 00:22:51,538
Maybe I should start
confiding in Emma.
32577
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