All language subtitles for Jessie.S01E10_2

It is 0700 hours!

Out of your cots
and hit the mess hall

for eggs Florentine
and chocolate croissants!

Okay, this rich people
food really kills
my whole military vibe.

Here's a fun fact.

When you're
blow-drying doll hair,
high is too high.

Oh. Uh, that's okay, sweetie.

Noses are
overrated anyway.
Just ask Voldemort.

Don't say his name!

Good morning, Jessie.

* Let's get this
weekend started

(SCATTING)

* Started
Started *

It's Monday.

Ugh. Wake me up
when it's Saturday.

Oh!

Hello, good family.
Who is ready to
get their learn on?

Oh, my. (CHUCKLES)
What you wearing?

It is my sherwani,
only worn on very
special occasions.

Since my tutor says
I am now ready
to start school

with Emma and Luke,
what better day
to wear it?

Maybe on a day when
your nightclub act
opens in Vegas.

Luke. That happens to be
a very beautiful,

traditional Indian
shaboopy.

Sure. Wani.

My point is that
you look really great

and I know Luke
is going to look out
for you today.

(CHUCKLES)

You better
look out for him.

How can I miss him?
He looks like
a traffic cone with hair.

Just go get dressed.

Your teachers send
enough letters home

without you showing up
in your underwear. Again.

So, what do you think
of my shoes?

I think they look like
some sort of medieval
torture device.

Pretty hurts.

And all my friends
will be wearing these
in a few months.

How do you know?

Because
I'm wearing them now.

It's my duty
to help the
fashion challenged.

Well, you'll just have
to do your duty in flats.

(CHUCKLES)
You said doody.

Get dressed.

* Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh

* Hey Jessie, hey Jessie

* It feels like a party
every day

* Hey Jessie, hey Jessie

* But they keep on pulling
me every which way

* Hey Jessie, hey Jessie

* My whole world is changing
Turning around

* They got me going crazy
Yeah, they're shaking
the ground

* But they took a chance
on the new girl in town

* And I don't want to let them
down, down, down

* Hey Jessie

* Hey Jessie

* It feels like a party
every day

* Hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, Jessie *

Okay, so you have History,
then Math, then Shop.

Just so you know,
Shop doesn't
involve shopping.

I learned that
the hard way.

Thank you,
but do not worry.

I have this
school thing wired.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

Fire! Fire! I will save
my new school.

That was
the school bell.

Not the "act like
an idiot" bell.

Oh, right. What does
the idiot bell sound like?

Because I want
to be prepared.

I think you're prepared.

Class is starting.
I gotta hustle.

Room 312, please.

Ravi K. Ross,
pleased to meet you.

Cheerio, fellow pupil.

Would you like to see
a picture of my lizard?

Ravi, dial it down.

I'm just trying
to make friends,

but nobody seems
to notice me.

Oh, they're noticing.

Look. I'm in a hurry,
so here's what
you need to do.

Find one main friend,
meet all his friends,

and bam, you're popular.

Oh, I see.

Hello, friend.

Gosh. Oh, I wish
it could be me,

but unfortunately,
this school has a policy

against kids in
different grades
socializing.

I'm in sixth
and you're in fifth.
Just wouldn't be natural.

(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)

Fire, class,
or idiot bell?

Class. Go.

Luke. Dale Davenport's back
and now so is my nervous rash.

I thought he was
suspended for a week.

Well, yeah, he was
supposed to be,

but the lunch lady was
too scared to testify.

Okay. Just calm down
and don't make eye contact.

Uh, right.

I'm feeling kind of thirsty.
Give me that.

Forty-five grams of sugar?
You want me to be
all jittery in class?

Tomorrow, you better
bring me some carrot juice.

And bring some
for yourself, too.
Your body is a temple.

Don't make me
knock it down.

Did you make
eye contact?

No, I stopped
at the nostrils.
They were so flared.

And he had bats
in the cave.

Why can't we just use
Mom's credit card
to buy me a new doll?

Because you appreciate
things more when you
work for them.

You think whining for
something isn't work?

I threw a four-day tantrum
to get that doll.

I cried off two pounds.

That's impressive.
But selling homemade lemonade
is an American tradition.

Plus, it's an easy way
for kids to get pocket money.

So are ATMs.
Can't we just
build one of those?

No. You're going to earn
the money for that doll.

How much is it, anyway?
Like 20, 30 bucks?

Two hundred.

What?

Two-fifty
if you want an outfit.

(GASPS)
That doll dresses
better than I do.

You said it, I didn't.

There. How does that look?

Is that supposed to be
my handwriting?

Because I know
which way my "E's" go.

It's adorable.
Adorable sells.

I got your adorable
right here.

You're right.
Who could say
no to that face?

Hi, Mrs. Chesterfield.
Lemonade?

No.

Come on. How do you expect
a little girl to make money
in the big city?

Do what I did. Marry it.

Okay, Chesterfield
doesn't count.

She only drinks
human blood.

Oh. Lemonade, Officer?

Half off for
New York's finest.

Don't be throwing
discounts around
willy-nilly.

Wait.

What is it?

It's a ticket
for not having
a vendor's permit.

Great job, Officer.
You're keeping the streets
safe from lemonade.

Maybe you'll get promoted
to the snow cone task force.

(LAUGHS)

Uh-oh, he's coming back.

Run!

Hi, brother.

No.

What are you doing here?

I'm here to seek admission
to your clique.

Ravi, I told you,
the grades can't mix.

At school.
But this is not school.

(CHUCKLES)
Why is that kid dressed
like a marshmallow?

This is a cricket uniform.

Dragon fire peppers, anyone?

They are hotter than
Selena Gomez.

I love you, Go Go.

I'm gonna have to pass.

Okay, your loss.

But it is
a six-hour match,

so do not complain
when you get peckish.

Now, I'm going to go
hammer in the wickets.

Wicket? Cricket?
That kid can stick it.

How do you even know him?

(STUTTERS)
I don't, really.

He's my dad's friend's
cousin's dog's neighbor.

RAVI: Wickets are almost in.

(METAL CLANGS)

(WATER SPRAYING)

Oh, no, you busted
a sprinkler pipe!

Oh, great, Luke.

Your dad's friend's
cousin's dog's neighbor
just flooded our field.

Let's go, guys.

(WATER SLOSHING)

Hello? Guys?

Are we now playing
hide-and-go-seek?

I'm afraid they are
now playing
hide from the geek.

You know, this is
actually better.

We're out of the sun,
no bus fumes...

And the fuzz
can't hassle us.

Hey, Emma.
Are you limping?

No. I'm not limping.
I'm dancing.

Good thing prom is
four years away.

All right. Do not
worry, Zuri, we'll have
your $200 in no time.

That's 280 with the ticket.

Yes, I can do math.

I wasn't sure after
seeing your spelling.

Zuri, hit me with a double.

I wish to drown
my sorrows in lemonade.

Ravi, you're soaking wet.
What happened?

I was trying to mingle
and there was
an irrigation mishap.

It is not easy
being the new kid.

Mmm, tell me about it.
I was a military brat.

Well, (CHUCKLES)
I wasn't a brat.
I was precious.

Is this going
to take a while?

Because this wet uniform
is starting to chafe.

Okay, the point is,
the adult in me wants
to say just be yourself

and everything will be fine.

But the teenager in me
knows that being yourself

can sometimes be
a one-way ticket
to Swirlyville.

Ooh, Swirlyville.
It sounds like
a magical place

where everyone gets
frozen yogurt.

No, a swirly is
a toilet shampoo.

So, no sprinkles?

Sometimes.

Maybe you could find
someone you admire
and try and be like them.

Maybe I could.
Thank you, Jessie.

I know exactly what
I am going to do.

Oh, really? Oh, great.
'Cause I was just
sort of winging it there.

Good evening,
Miss Chesterfield.

Ugh. You cannot
sell lemonade
in my building, Bessie.

It is completely
inappropriate.

Hello, Bertie. Ha-ha!

You want some fries
with that shake?

I hate to turn down fries,
but I'm gonna go with no.

(LAUGHS) Tease.

(CHUCKLES)

(SIGHS)

Why are you still here?

Please, Mrs. Chesterfield,
let Zuri have her
lemonade stand.

Do you have to crush
a little girl's spirit?

(LAUGHS) Well,
if I don't, who will?

It's for a really
good cause.

Which is?

I need a new doll!

Hmm, that sounded
a lot less selfish
in my head.

Strange little girl,
let this be
a lesson to you.

When life gives you lemons,
do not make lemonade.

Now go peddle
your swill elsewhere.

That woman needs to
lay off the haterade.

What is crack-a-lackin',
dog pound?

Ravi, what are you doing?
And why are you
wearing my clothes?

I'm emulating
my chosen role model,

homeslice.

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

Hip-hop, straight-up
with a side of sizzle.

(MIMICS SIZZLING)

Ravi. Ravi, Ravi.
Don't look at that kid.

You mean the behemoth
with the lame mustache?

Did someone just
call me a he-moth?

We meant no offense.

It was just good-natured
banter betwixt chums.

Just for that,
you can all treat me
to lunch today.

Is this processed?

No, I think it's baloney.
Please don't hurt me.

I don't have to.
The nitrates will
get you first.

It's organic.

It better be.
Hey, lunch lady,
you didn't see nothing.

Thanks a lot, Ravi.

I truly apologize, brother.

You know what?
We may be
brothers at home,

but outside the house,

just pretend
you don't know me.

So now would be
a bad time to return
your underpants?

(SCREAMS)

Hello, sister.

Ravi. why are you
hiding in my locker?

I have incurred the wrath
of a muscle-bound goon,

and Luke says we are
no longer brothers at school.

Ravi, that is not okay.

If it was, I would
have disowned Luke
a long time ago.

Pardon me.
My ride is here.

(GASPS)

Oh. Hi, Jessie.

What are you doing here?

You forgot your
Edgar Allan Poe book.

I read one of
the stories on the bus.

What is it with this guy
and dead chicks?

So, is there anything
you'd like to tell me?

Nope.
Thanks for the book.
See you at home.

Emma, you're eight inches
taller than when you
left this morning.

Now, step out of the bag
and explain yourself.

Well, the thing is...

Luke told Ravi
they're not
brothers anymore.

See you.

(SCREAMS)

Are you okay?

Luke, don't even think
about going anywhere.

Emma, I told you
not to wear those
shoes at school.

Now, hand them over.

Come here.

Okay, okay,
you were right.

I've had to go to the nurse
three times this week

with blisters
and bunions and bruises.

Oh, my.

And no one's followed
my fashionHmm.d, anyway.

(GASPS)
I stand corrected.

Looking good,
Nurse Nancy.

Now, let's talk
about that pantsuit.

Okay, now about
you and Ravi.

Listen, you never
turn your back on family.

Especially my family,
'cause they're all
packing heat.

But Ravi embarrassed me.

A lot.

Oh, yeah? You think
I'm not embarrassed

when my grandpa
drives around
in his pick-up truck

lip-synching
to Katy Perry?

How about when
my Aunt Ruby wears

a "Don't mess with
Texas" belly shirt
to Thanksgiving?

Every single year.

Ew!

With family,
it's all about loyalty.

Okay, okay, I got it.

Good. Well, that worked.

And I didn't even have
to bring up my Uncle Randy
and his jump-roping ferrets.

What's up, dudes?
Has anyone seen
Ravi around?

Yeah, I saw him earlier,
riding around
on the janitor's cart.

Face it, Luke,
this kid's weirder than
the Boiled Egg Twins.

(GASPS)

Hey, you got any
smart comments
for me today?

Scientists have
recently discovered
subatomic particles

that can go faster
than the speed of light

which threaten
to undermine Einstein's
theory of relativity.

Too smart?

The speed of my fist
is about to
threaten your teeth.

(IMITATING RAVI'S ACCENT)
Wait. I am the one

who insulted
your womanly mustache.

No, it was me.

It was me, I tell you.

Clearly, you are not
smart enough to recognize
a phony Indian accent.

I insist you pummel me.

Works for me.

(SCREAMS)

No. Leave my
little brother alone.

ALL: Ooh!

Or else what, troll bait?

Or else I'm going
to break your
mouth-breathing face.

(GROoh.NG)

(NERVOUS LAUGHTER)

Multi-grain!
Don't mind if I do.

(SCREAMS)
It burns! Water! Water!

(ALL LAUGHING)

Ravi, what was
in that sandwich?

Just bread, mayonnaise,
and Indian
dragon fire peppers.

One of the hottest
peppers in the world.

(SCREAMS)
My tongue, it's melting!

Yes, yes,
it has that effect.

Wait until
the seeds kick in.

(SCREAMS) It burns.

And the seeds kicked in.

(SCREAMS)

(CHUCKLES)

Mmm. Delicious.

That was awesome.

But how do you
eat that without
screaming in pain?

Where I come from,
people sleep on
beds of nails

and walk on hot coals.

This is nothing.

Thanks, Bro.
And I'm sorry
if I acted like a jerk.

You did,
but I forgive you.

Hey, want to come
hang out with me
and my friends?

Thank you, but I have
a prior engagement.

You are looking
at the new

recording secretary
of the reptile club.

Hey, that's cool.

(ALL PANTING)

That ghastly little girl
kept us all hostage

in a moving sauna.

(EXCLAIMS)

Oh, never mind.

There you are, Zuri.
Why is it so hot in here?

I find the space heater
really moves product.

That's basically extortion.

But I made $300.

Who says crime
doesn't pay?

Let's go get you that doll.

I can't. With the ticket,
the space heater,

and this super-cute
bathing suit,

I think I'm still short.

Ugh.

Strange little girl,

I told you no more
selling lemonade
in the building.

Yes, ma'am.
I know I was wrong,

so to make up for it,
I'm giving away free cookies.

Really? That Bessie
didn't make those, did she?

No, they're Ravi's
secret recipe.

(CHUCKLES) I shouldn't.

Oh, well. I did
power walk today.

To the Falafel Hut.
(LAUGHS)

How dare you judge me!

My arm's getting tired.

Well, if you insist.

They're dragon fire
chocolate chip.

Mmm. (CHUCKLES)

Mmm.

Hot. Hot.

So hot!

Hotter than
Anderson Cooper!

(BABBLING)

(SCREAMS) I need water!

Water won't help.
What you need is milk.

Milk for sale.
Milk for sale.
Ten dollars a cup.

(GASPING)

I can't believe I wasted
all that time on lemonade.

(GASPS)

Hey. Those are my shoes!

Oh, relax.
I'm just borrowing them
until you're 18.

Let me show you
how it's done.

Take notes.

Whoa!