Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,039 --> 00:00:04,060
- Morning.
- Morning.
2
00:00:04,108 --> 00:00:06,596
- Can I borrow this a quick sec?
- I guess. That's kinda gross.
3
00:00:06,644 --> 00:00:08,906
Well, every time we break up,
you throw mine away.
4
00:00:08,955 --> 00:00:10,516
Next time,
I'll wrap it up in toilet paper
5
00:00:10,565 --> 00:00:11,787
and store it under the sink.
6
00:00:11,836 --> 00:00:15,038
FYI, I throw it away
because it reminds me of you!
7
00:00:15,087 --> 00:00:16,983
And how irresistible I am?
8
00:00:17,108 --> 00:00:18,650
[SPITS]
9
00:00:18,889 --> 00:00:21,410
- Love you, Cyn.
- I love you, Jann.
10
00:00:21,458 --> 00:00:23,446
[THEME MUSIC]
11
00:00:23,729 --> 00:00:26,782
Hey, can you tell me what the
weather's gonna be like today?
12
00:00:26,830 --> 00:00:28,590
[AUTOMATED VOICE]: The weatherin Calgary is sunny
13
00:00:28,638 --> 00:00:31,177
with a chance of clouds.Expect a chill.
14
00:00:32,296 --> 00:00:34,090
[DOOR SHUTS]
15
00:00:35,318 --> 00:00:36,568
You two back together?
16
00:00:36,617 --> 00:00:38,705
Let me just say this: this morning,
17
00:00:38,754 --> 00:00:41,159
we may have shared a toothbrush.
18
00:00:41,265 --> 00:00:42,646
Is that code for something?
19
00:00:42,695 --> 00:00:44,030
- No.
- We're back together.
20
00:00:44,079 --> 00:00:46,724
Deciding to share a toothbrush
comes at the worst time!
21
00:00:46,773 --> 00:00:48,168
Well, she keeps throwing mine away!
22
00:00:48,220 --> 00:00:49,965
Because I just scored Jann a single
23
00:00:50,014 --> 00:00:52,005
on the Why Am I Still Single
compilation album.
24
00:00:52,054 --> 00:00:53,764
- What's that?
- An album of singles,
25
00:00:53,813 --> 00:00:55,077
by singles for singles
26
00:00:55,126 --> 00:00:56,468
because people love being single now.
27
00:00:56,517 --> 00:00:58,533
I do miss it sometimes.
28
00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:01,095
Just keep your new
relationship status low-key
29
00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:02,529
until the single drops,
30
00:01:02,578 --> 00:01:05,408
or until you inevitably break up again.
31
00:01:05,510 --> 00:01:07,290
- Good plan.
- Really?
32
00:01:07,376 --> 00:01:08,928
Ahead of the song's official release,
33
00:01:08,977 --> 00:01:11,002
we're going to Toronto
to promote it on The Insight.
34
00:01:11,090 --> 00:01:13,202
I do love that show.
It's a guilty pleasure.
35
00:01:13,344 --> 00:01:15,301
- What do you mean?
- A guilty pleasure,
36
00:01:15,528 --> 00:01:18,387
like something you secretly
enjoy but it's kinda frivolous.
37
00:01:18,503 --> 00:01:19,950
Like sleep?
38
00:01:20,515 --> 00:01:22,472
I'm gonna start writing a new song.
39
00:01:22,521 --> 00:01:24,676
I don't even need that much time.
40
00:01:24,864 --> 00:01:26,630
I remember the feeling
41
00:01:26,679 --> 00:01:28,981
of being single like it was yesterday.
42
00:01:29,163 --> 00:01:30,813
No need. It's already done.
43
00:01:30,861 --> 00:01:32,590
What, did you use one
of my old tracks or something?
44
00:01:32,639 --> 00:01:34,599
Better, remember when you recorded
45
00:01:34,648 --> 00:01:36,075
your audiobook for your memoir?
46
00:01:36,124 --> 00:01:38,087
One time, my mom sent me to school,
47
00:01:38,136 --> 00:01:39,567
with a hotdog,
48
00:01:39,616 --> 00:01:41,340
in a thermos full of boiling water.
49
00:01:41,442 --> 00:01:44,860
Six hours later,
the wiener was not coming out.
50
00:01:44,908 --> 00:01:46,723
Ahem. Sorry.
51
00:01:46,772 --> 00:01:48,064
Just give me a second here.
52
00:01:48,112 --> 00:01:50,499
I am a hot mess. Hot, hot mess.
53
00:01:50,547 --> 00:01:52,902
Why am I single? Is that what
you're saying to yourself?
54
00:01:53,207 --> 00:01:55,567
They sampled some of your
takes to record a single,
55
00:01:55,656 --> 00:01:56,754
and it's tight.
56
00:01:56,866 --> 00:01:58,707
[ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS]
57
00:01:59,082 --> 00:02:01,310
[JANN AUTO-TUNED]: ? I am
a hot mess, I am ?
58
00:02:01,358 --> 00:02:04,090
? I am a hot mess, hot mess ?
59
00:02:04,139 --> 00:02:06,074
? Hey, why am I single? ?
60
00:02:06,123 --> 00:02:07,182
[MUSIC STOPS]
61
00:02:07,231 --> 00:02:09,352
That's not tight. That's tragic.
62
00:02:09,454 --> 00:02:12,089
- That's relative.
- Cynthia, tight or tragic?
63
00:02:12,443 --> 00:02:14,548
Well, it's definitely a departure.
64
00:02:14,642 --> 00:02:16,548
- Thank you.
- But it's oddly catchy.
65
00:02:16,603 --> 00:02:18,427
- Thank you.
- I'm just being honest.
66
00:02:18,682 --> 00:02:20,476
Well, that was your first mistake.
67
00:02:21,101 --> 00:02:23,169
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
68
00:02:26,617 --> 00:02:28,871
I didn't want milk in my cereal.
69
00:02:29,167 --> 00:02:30,664
I will have this one.
70
00:02:30,888 --> 00:02:32,441
You look tired.
71
00:02:32,490 --> 00:02:33,854
Yeah,
I was up all last night with James.
72
00:02:33,903 --> 00:02:34,980
I just didn't want to wake you.
73
00:02:35,029 --> 00:02:36,370
[MAX]: Aww.
74
00:02:36,419 --> 00:02:38,528
Can I have a spoon, please?
75
00:02:40,221 --> 00:02:41,417
World's best dad.
76
00:02:41,466 --> 00:02:43,019
Hey, I'm just living up to my title.
77
00:02:43,068 --> 00:02:45,737
Mm-hmm. "World's Sexiest Grandma."
78
00:02:45,814 --> 00:02:47,615
That's right.
79
00:02:49,284 --> 00:02:50,793
This is just cream.
80
00:02:51,206 --> 00:02:52,762
My parents are back from their cruise.
81
00:02:52,810 --> 00:02:53,948
That was a long one.
82
00:02:53,997 --> 00:02:55,800
Yeah, it was almost three months.
83
00:02:55,849 --> 00:02:57,581
I'll probably bring James
over there tomorrow,
84
00:02:57,630 --> 00:03:00,661
assuming Mom wants to see
her new grandchild.
85
00:03:00,710 --> 00:03:01,872
Well...
86
00:03:01,921 --> 00:03:03,839
Only if you're feeling
up to it. I mean, your mom can
87
00:03:03,887 --> 00:03:05,323
be exhausting.
88
00:03:05,372 --> 00:03:06,447
That is true.
89
00:03:06,496 --> 00:03:08,884
- [BOWL FALLS]
- That wasn't me!
90
00:03:08,994 --> 00:03:11,427
Can we please just get through
one meal without a spill?
91
00:03:11,476 --> 00:03:13,864
- [BOWL FALLS]
- It was me this time.
92
00:03:14,786 --> 00:03:16,104
Yeah.
93
00:03:16,324 --> 00:03:18,387
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
94
00:03:18,519 --> 00:03:21,211
[VOCALISTS HARMONIZING]
95
00:03:21,692 --> 00:03:23,454
Just be careful with the bunion.
96
00:03:23,503 --> 00:03:25,903
I haven't had it officially diagnosed,
97
00:03:25,952 --> 00:03:27,930
but I'm gonna just go with bunion.
98
00:03:27,978 --> 00:03:29,395
I went on WebMD,
99
00:03:29,444 --> 00:03:31,013
and they thought, you know,
100
00:03:31,062 --> 00:03:33,851
maybe it might be
an ingrown hair or a sixth toe.
101
00:03:33,900 --> 00:03:35,528
So thank you so much.
102
00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:37,122
Hey, thanks for coming.
103
00:03:37,171 --> 00:03:38,372
I hate going behind her back,
104
00:03:38,421 --> 00:03:39,608
but I didn't know what else to do.
105
00:03:39,656 --> 00:03:40,794
Anytime.
106
00:03:40,843 --> 00:03:42,378
It actually worked out perfectly.
107
00:03:42,426 --> 00:03:44,380
Nia's napping between
major press interviews.
108
00:03:44,428 --> 00:03:45,849
She's really in demand!
109
00:03:45,898 --> 00:03:47,263
Everyone wants a piece of her.
110
00:03:47,312 --> 00:03:48,712
- I've never seen anything like it.
- Cool.
111
00:03:48,761 --> 00:03:50,721
She's so likeable, everyone's
rooting for her to succeed.
112
00:03:50,769 --> 00:03:52,132
Yeah, OK, moving on.
113
00:03:52,757 --> 00:03:53,956
Why are we meeting here?
114
00:03:54,004 --> 00:03:55,216
[SIGHS]
115
00:03:55,265 --> 00:03:57,808
I had to go someplace
where Cale would not set foot.
116
00:03:57,857 --> 00:03:59,700
No offence, honestly,
but you know what I mean.
117
00:03:59,888 --> 00:04:02,046
If she saw us together, she'd lose it.
118
00:04:02,614 --> 00:04:04,600
You sounded panicked
on the phone. What's going on?
119
00:04:04,648 --> 00:04:07,970
Cale had me record a single
for singles about being single.
120
00:04:08,018 --> 00:04:09,716
- Very "on brand."
- OK. You're not wrong.
121
00:04:09,765 --> 00:04:12,333
But the thing is,
I had zero creative input
122
00:04:12,382 --> 00:04:15,111
and I don't even remember
recording the song!
123
00:04:15,159 --> 00:04:16,979
- Have some funny mushroom tea?
- I wish, but no.
124
00:04:17,027 --> 00:04:18,806
- Listen to this.
- [ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS]
125
00:04:18,908 --> 00:04:22,248
[JANN AUTO-TUNED]:
? It's super hot in this booth ?
126
00:04:22,499 --> 00:04:26,413
? I've got a wiener in my thermos ?
127
00:04:26,477 --> 00:04:29,398
? I'm having another hot flash ?
128
00:04:30,064 --> 00:04:33,594
? I've got a wiener in my thermos ?
129
00:04:33,643 --> 00:04:34,806
[MUSIC STOPS]
130
00:04:34,892 --> 00:04:36,465
Wow. [LAUGHS]
131
00:04:36,513 --> 00:04:39,335
- That is... Hey, that is...
- [BOTH LAUGH]
132
00:04:39,591 --> 00:04:42,130
No, that is incredibly...
133
00:04:42,179 --> 00:04:43,231
Bad?
134
00:04:43,285 --> 00:04:45,419
Like very, very sort of... terrible.
135
00:04:45,507 --> 00:04:46,833
It's kinda catchy!
136
00:04:46,882 --> 00:04:48,563
You know what? I bet you
on your way home in your car,
137
00:04:48,612 --> 00:04:49,682
you're gonna be singin' it.
138
00:04:49,731 --> 00:04:51,255
That's the hallmark of a good song.
139
00:04:51,414 --> 00:04:52,762
OK, anyway, whatever.
140
00:04:52,896 --> 00:04:53,990
What do you think I should do?
141
00:04:54,039 --> 00:04:55,209
Write something better, Jann.
142
00:04:55,315 --> 00:04:57,568
Like the kind of song you
listen to on a rainy day while
143
00:04:57,617 --> 00:04:58,895
sobbing into a tuna sandwich.
144
00:04:58,944 --> 00:05:00,404
That is really specific, Todd.
145
00:05:00,453 --> 00:05:01,680
You gotta paint the picture.
146
00:05:02,115 --> 00:05:03,926
[SIGHS] Well...
147
00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:05,365
I know where you're coming from.
148
00:05:05,414 --> 00:05:07,622
I need to write something
better than this garbage,
149
00:05:07,671 --> 00:05:09,498
so maybe I can change Cale's mind.
150
00:05:09,546 --> 00:05:10,872
Seriously, watch that bunion,
151
00:05:10,921 --> 00:05:12,818
because if it turns out to be a boil,
152
00:05:12,867 --> 00:05:15,805
you and I are both
gonna be in a lot of trouble.
153
00:05:15,853 --> 00:05:19,088
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
154
00:05:19,786 --> 00:05:23,379
[JANN PLAYS GUITAR AND SINGS]
? All that we have ?
155
00:05:23,934 --> 00:05:27,583
? Is each other ?
156
00:05:27,708 --> 00:05:31,554
? And that's all I ?
157
00:05:32,419 --> 00:05:34,857
? Ever wanted ?
158
00:05:35,588 --> 00:05:36,759
[DINGING]
159
00:05:36,808 --> 00:05:38,467
What do you say?
160
00:05:38,528 --> 00:05:39,595
It's still a no.
161
00:05:39,643 --> 00:05:41,099
OK, imagine it without Rhonda.
162
00:05:41,148 --> 00:05:42,097
No-no offence, Rhonda.
163
00:05:42,145 --> 00:05:44,263
None taken. I have
no clue what I'm doing.
164
00:05:44,312 --> 00:05:46,505
Look, it's a great song, Jann but...
165
00:05:46,554 --> 00:05:47,706
Just not for this.
166
00:05:47,755 --> 00:05:49,320
The single stays the same.
167
00:05:49,369 --> 00:05:51,140
Focus on your
appearance on The Insight.
168
00:05:51,189 --> 00:05:52,710
I'll see you at the
airport tomorrow morning.
169
00:05:52,758 --> 00:05:54,731
Oh, I meant to tell you
that my mom wants to come,
170
00:05:54,780 --> 00:05:57,243
which means Charley needs to come too.
171
00:05:57,772 --> 00:06:00,236
That song made me feel
really sad and lonely.
172
00:06:00,285 --> 00:06:01,725
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- Thank you!
173
00:06:01,774 --> 00:06:03,591
- Do you wanna hang out?
- Nope.
174
00:06:07,695 --> 00:06:09,496
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
175
00:06:12,476 --> 00:06:14,187
Thanks for bringing us along, Auntie J!
176
00:06:14,236 --> 00:06:15,882
This is gonna be so much fun.
177
00:06:15,931 --> 00:06:17,555
I appreciate your optimism.
178
00:06:17,671 --> 00:06:19,202
I love The Insight.
179
00:06:19,251 --> 00:06:21,452
It's always telling me
about the current trends.
180
00:06:21,538 --> 00:06:22,703
That's how I learned
181
00:06:22,752 --> 00:06:25,421
that mixing bold patterns
is hot this season!
182
00:06:25,470 --> 00:06:26,906
Well, I'm happy you guys are here.
183
00:06:26,955 --> 00:06:28,650
It's good to have family close...
184
00:06:28,845 --> 00:06:30,932
To use as human buffers.
185
00:06:31,116 --> 00:06:33,046
Plus, this could be
your last time on a plane.
186
00:06:33,116 --> 00:06:35,541
- Well, yours too, Sparky.
- Yeah, it could be.
187
00:06:35,589 --> 00:06:37,376
We're gonna miss our flight!
188
00:06:37,796 --> 00:06:39,358
- Here, hang onto this.
- OK.
189
00:06:39,436 --> 00:06:42,090
Mom... take one for the team.
190
00:06:42,209 --> 00:06:44,702
Get in. Get in, get in.
191
00:06:44,829 --> 00:06:47,584
Excuse me. Very elderly woman
coming through.
192
00:06:47,968 --> 00:06:50,059
- Oh, yeah.
- She's got two titanium hips.
193
00:06:50,108 --> 00:06:51,657
She's got water on the knee,
194
00:06:51,705 --> 00:06:52,898
something on her arm,
195
00:06:52,947 --> 00:06:54,132
a plate in her wrist,
196
00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:56,863
and she's obviously
quite clearly colour-blind.
197
00:06:56,947 --> 00:06:58,937
Borderline incontinent.
198
00:06:58,986 --> 00:07:01,007
Mom, dial it back!
199
00:07:01,213 --> 00:07:03,568
You don't wanna have us
put on a watch list.
200
00:07:03,874 --> 00:07:05,382
[BEEPING]
201
00:07:05,578 --> 00:07:07,703
Arms in. Arms in.
202
00:07:07,752 --> 00:07:08,883
Hi.
203
00:07:09,015 --> 00:07:11,135
- Hey. How you doing? Oh.
- [OVER PA]: This is a reminder to please
204
00:07:11,184 --> 00:07:12,729
do not leave your bags unattended.
205
00:07:12,778 --> 00:07:15,632
Any unattended bags will be
removed and destroyed.
206
00:07:15,681 --> 00:07:18,033
- Ma'am, is this your bag?
- Yes.
207
00:07:18,147 --> 00:07:20,867
I'm gonna have to open it.
I see something concerning.
208
00:07:22,002 --> 00:07:23,820
I'm gonna stop you right
there and I'm gonna tell you
209
00:07:23,869 --> 00:07:25,835
that's exactly what you think it is.
210
00:07:25,884 --> 00:07:27,459
And what do I think it is?
211
00:07:27,749 --> 00:07:30,343
It is a... pocket frother.
212
00:07:30,392 --> 00:07:32,340
I am very particular about my lattes.
213
00:07:32,389 --> 00:07:34,085
Please don't confiscate it.
214
00:07:34,134 --> 00:07:35,718
I gave it to her for Christmas.
215
00:07:35,767 --> 00:07:36,890
She's incontinent.
216
00:07:36,939 --> 00:07:38,827
- Just go.
- Yeah.
217
00:07:39,467 --> 00:07:40,773
Ruins a lot of pants.
218
00:07:41,297 --> 00:07:43,032
Grab my stuff, Charley.
219
00:07:43,123 --> 00:07:45,071
[SOFT MUSIC]
220
00:07:45,292 --> 00:07:46,542
Mom?
221
00:07:48,356 --> 00:07:49,915
Mom?
222
00:07:51,005 --> 00:07:52,055
Mother?
223
00:07:52,103 --> 00:07:53,400
- Mom!
- Oh!
224
00:07:53,455 --> 00:07:56,555
Oh, jeez! Davie, you scared
the crap out of me.
225
00:07:56,603 --> 00:07:58,890
I guess you didn't hear me
yelling your name over and over?
226
00:07:58,939 --> 00:08:01,377
I was listening to a podcast
on global warming.
227
00:08:01,426 --> 00:08:02,831
Ooh. And?
228
00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:05,252
And Grammy learned that we are...
229
00:08:05,301 --> 00:08:06,999
Doomed, doomed, doomed,
doomed, doomed, doomed!
230
00:08:07,048 --> 00:08:08,588
There's nothing stopping it.
231
00:08:08,637 --> 00:08:10,463
We've got about eight good years left.
232
00:08:10,512 --> 00:08:12,344
- Oh, well!
- So why bother with the yoga?
233
00:08:12,393 --> 00:08:14,057
Oh, I started doing it on the cruise.
234
00:08:14,106 --> 00:08:16,104
I mean, mainly just to
spend time with the instructor.
235
00:08:16,153 --> 00:08:17,676
He was really hot.
236
00:08:17,724 --> 00:08:19,322
And Dad?
237
00:08:19,371 --> 00:08:21,507
Dad find the instructor really hot?
238
00:08:21,573 --> 00:08:22,987
- [LAUGHS]
239
00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:25,471
Davie, you know your father
would never do yoga.
240
00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:26,994
Oh, of course not.
241
00:08:27,072 --> 00:08:28,865
That's fine. I'm gonna get
myself a glass of water.
242
00:08:30,126 --> 00:08:31,806
Hey, what happened
to all the family photos?
243
00:08:31,860 --> 00:08:33,563
Oh, I got sick of looking at them.
244
00:08:33,612 --> 00:08:35,547
I never liked my hair.
It never fell right.
245
00:08:36,588 --> 00:08:39,743
I got my d�cor tips from The Insight.
246
00:08:39,792 --> 00:08:40,989
Mm.
247
00:08:41,037 --> 00:08:42,991
That one right there,
that's my favourite.
248
00:08:43,582 --> 00:08:45,160
Ah, what a journey.
249
00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:47,596
- [CHUCKLES]
- So, do you, uh,
250
00:08:47,750 --> 00:08:49,928
- do you even want this?
- Yes, of course I do!
251
00:08:49,977 --> 00:08:51,126
Just put it in the drawer.
252
00:08:51,175 --> 00:08:53,093
No, no. Not that one,
the one behind you.
253
00:08:53,197 --> 00:08:54,964
Oh, the junk drawer.
254
00:08:55,185 --> 00:08:57,272
Oh, she is perfect, Davie.
255
00:08:57,320 --> 00:08:59,408
- What an angel!
- Yeah, we like her.
256
00:08:59,457 --> 00:09:01,778
Ooh. I'm your Grammy Georgie.
257
00:09:02,588 --> 00:09:03,753
I don't think you need that
258
00:09:03,802 --> 00:09:05,781
silly little hat any longer, do you?
259
00:09:06,229 --> 00:09:08,182
- [JAMES COOS]
- I'm really happy you're home.
260
00:09:08,237 --> 00:09:11,465
Aw, yeah. Me too.
If only for a few days.
261
00:09:11,514 --> 00:09:13,229
What? You're leaving again?
262
00:09:13,278 --> 00:09:14,471
I thought I told you.
263
00:09:14,520 --> 00:09:17,463
We're doing a bike trip
around the French countryside.
264
00:09:17,565 --> 00:09:19,795
Mm! We leave on Friday.
265
00:09:20,088 --> 00:09:21,658
Oh, we'll be back by Christmas.
266
00:09:21,707 --> 00:09:22,789
I mean, that is...
267
00:09:22,838 --> 00:09:25,167
If we don't extend into Italy.
268
00:09:25,215 --> 00:09:26,940
That's unbelievable.
269
00:09:26,989 --> 00:09:28,550
I mean, you already missed her birth.
270
00:09:28,599 --> 00:09:30,081
- I saw the video.
- Yeah, but
271
00:09:30,130 --> 00:09:31,344
now you're leaving again?
272
00:09:31,455 --> 00:09:33,565
You know, between you and your sisters,
273
00:09:33,614 --> 00:09:35,300
I've got nine grandbabies.
274
00:09:35,349 --> 00:09:37,229
Now, I could spend the
remainder of my good years
275
00:09:37,278 --> 00:09:38,513
wiping snotty noses,
276
00:09:38,561 --> 00:09:40,916
but I've already
done that with my own kids!
277
00:09:40,965 --> 00:09:42,893
This is my time.
278
00:09:42,942 --> 00:09:44,195
I wanna go places.
279
00:09:44,244 --> 00:09:45,924
- I wanna do things.
- Like what?
280
00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:47,963
I don't know!
Whatever I feel like doing.
281
00:09:48,012 --> 00:09:49,705
Like fawn over yoga instructors?
282
00:09:49,754 --> 00:09:52,430
- Well, if I feel like it, yes.
- Why not?
283
00:09:52,479 --> 00:09:53,761
I wanna learn to rollerblade.
284
00:09:53,810 --> 00:09:56,104
I wanna go zip lining and maybe
285
00:09:56,153 --> 00:09:58,432
I wanna try my hand at nude volleyball.
286
00:09:58,799 --> 00:10:01,174
What are you talking about?!
287
00:10:01,572 --> 00:10:04,140
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
288
00:10:08,823 --> 00:10:11,077
Sound check went well. You feel ready?
289
00:10:11,187 --> 00:10:12,682
The song is basically one line.
290
00:10:12,731 --> 00:10:14,409
- I think I got it.
- Good.
291
00:10:14,458 --> 00:10:15,699
When you're out there, just remember
292
00:10:15,747 --> 00:10:17,300
to plug the single as much as possible.
293
00:10:17,349 --> 00:10:18,682
Not my first rodeo.
294
00:10:18,807 --> 00:10:20,190
Gram and I are gonna take our seats
295
00:10:20,239 --> 00:10:21,550
in the studio audience.
296
00:10:21,599 --> 00:10:22,901
OK.
297
00:10:25,690 --> 00:10:28,213
- Mom? What are you doing?
- I'm gonna play a drinking game.
298
00:10:28,262 --> 00:10:30,158
Every time I see my face on TV,
299
00:10:30,207 --> 00:10:31,424
I'm gonna take a shot.
300
00:10:31,473 --> 00:10:32,611
Please tell me you're joking.
301
00:10:32,682 --> 00:10:35,036
- I will if you want me to.
- Just go!
302
00:10:36,068 --> 00:10:37,834
[JANN SIGHS]
303
00:10:40,883 --> 00:10:43,667
So much for human buffers.
304
00:10:43,793 --> 00:10:45,653
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS]
305
00:10:45,795 --> 00:10:48,783
Joining us now,
the one and only Jann Arden!
306
00:10:49,101 --> 00:10:50,537
[APPLAUSE AND CHEERING]
307
00:10:50,867 --> 00:10:52,634
[INAUDIBLE SPEAKING]
308
00:10:57,819 --> 00:10:59,812
[BOTH]: Hi!
309
00:11:00,039 --> 00:11:02,260
[CHARLEY]: Ah, it's Jann!
310
00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:05,972
Camera one, stay off the old
lady for obvious reasons.
311
00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:09,024
It is so great to see you!
312
00:11:09,118 --> 00:11:11,106
So good to be seen. Hey, K.D.
313
00:11:11,154 --> 00:11:12,874
- Hello.
- Holy moly!
314
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:15,043
Yeah, well, the two of you,
you're both from Calgary.
315
00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:17,312
So you must have worked together
at some point before.
316
00:11:17,360 --> 00:11:18,937
- I've always wanted to.
- No.
317
00:11:19,098 --> 00:11:21,286
Well, we just haven't found
the right project, I don't...
318
00:11:21,335 --> 00:11:22,817
I've never looked.
319
00:11:23,175 --> 00:11:24,852
OK. So Jann, why don't you fill us in
320
00:11:24,901 --> 00:11:26,595
on what you've been up to lately?
321
00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:27,589
I had my gall bladder out.
322
00:11:27,637 --> 00:11:30,094
- Oh! Wow.
- Quite a surprise. Uh...
323
00:11:30,143 --> 00:11:31,313
Interesting surgery.
324
00:11:31,362 --> 00:11:34,212
They go in laparoscopically
and they cut it off
325
00:11:34,261 --> 00:11:35,899
and they put it into a bag and they
326
00:11:35,948 --> 00:11:37,742
yank it out through your belly button
327
00:11:37,791 --> 00:11:39,376
and honestly, it's the closest
328
00:11:39,425 --> 00:11:41,538
I'll ever get to having a baby, right?
329
00:11:42,210 --> 00:11:44,414
But anyway,
thank you. I got that beautiful
330
00:11:44,472 --> 00:11:46,915
edible floral arrangement from you.
331
00:11:46,964 --> 00:11:48,810
Oh. My management must
332
00:11:48,858 --> 00:11:51,584
- have sent that to you.
- Oh. Well, it was nice.
333
00:11:51,907 --> 00:11:53,899
Is there anything else
you wanna talk about?
334
00:11:53,952 --> 00:11:55,548
Maybe more career-related?
335
00:11:55,597 --> 00:11:56,916
Huh. Uh...
336
00:11:57,033 --> 00:11:59,754
I think I've been
just doing some reassessing
337
00:11:59,802 --> 00:12:02,539
of everything and really
concentrating on self-care.
338
00:12:02,637 --> 00:12:04,624
Oh, isn't that great?
339
00:12:04,781 --> 00:12:06,902
[APPLAUSE]
340
00:12:07,076 --> 00:12:09,977
Absolutely. I mean,
when that oxygen mask drops,
341
00:12:10,026 --> 00:12:11,922
you gotta put it
on yourself first, am I right?
342
00:12:12,016 --> 00:12:13,736
- [INAUDIBLE SPEAKING]
- You're so right. So right.
343
00:12:13,805 --> 00:12:16,171
Oh, I, uh, I have a new single as well.
344
00:12:16,219 --> 00:12:18,273
Oh, we are so excited to hear about it.
345
00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:20,108
I hear it's a real, like,
departure for you.
346
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:22,010
It is not even on this planet.
347
00:12:22,058 --> 00:12:23,313
It's very departed.
348
00:12:23,362 --> 00:12:25,946
OK, well, what would you two both say
349
00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:28,956
has been the key to
your career longevity?
350
00:12:29,005 --> 00:12:31,389
- Say yes to everything.
- I'm the opposite.
351
00:12:31,438 --> 00:12:33,766
- I don't say yes to everything.
- No kidding.
352
00:12:33,815 --> 00:12:35,977
I like to choose my projects
super carefully,
353
00:12:36,026 --> 00:12:39,351
so that my most authentic self
connects with the audience.
354
00:12:39,442 --> 00:12:42,497
- Mm-hmm.
- I wanna do that too.
355
00:12:42,545 --> 00:12:45,450
- I wanna be truer to myself.
- Yeah. Otherwise, there's no point.
356
00:12:45,609 --> 00:12:47,305
- You're right.
- I know.
357
00:12:47,430 --> 00:12:49,571
That is really beautiful.
358
00:12:49,696 --> 00:12:52,665
Coming up next, Jann is gonna be
performing her new single.
359
00:12:52,714 --> 00:12:54,032
Don't go anywhere.
360
00:12:54,141 --> 00:12:55,510
[APPLAUSE AND CHEERING]
361
00:12:55,644 --> 00:12:57,578
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS]
362
00:13:00,063 --> 00:13:02,117
I'm feeling judged by you, Davie.
363
00:13:02,166 --> 00:13:04,461
Well, that's good, Mom,
because I am judging you.
364
00:13:04,510 --> 00:13:05,962
What, is it the nude volleyball?
365
00:13:06,011 --> 00:13:07,657
- Is that what you're bumping on?
- Uh-huh!
366
00:13:07,706 --> 00:13:10,828
Well, I YouTubed it and
volleyball is not that hard.
367
00:13:10,877 --> 00:13:12,102
It's not the difficult...
368
00:13:12,151 --> 00:13:14,428
Wait, where's Dad? Maybe he can
get us back on track.
369
00:13:14,477 --> 00:13:16,296
He's at his pottery class.
370
00:13:17,258 --> 00:13:19,548
Pottery? Since when?
371
00:13:19,597 --> 00:13:21,992
Since he got a crush on his teacher.
372
00:13:22,057 --> 00:13:23,600
What is this fresh hell?
373
00:13:23,649 --> 00:13:25,532
Oh God, just relax, Davie.
374
00:13:25,581 --> 00:13:27,487
We're still very much together.
375
00:13:27,557 --> 00:13:29,789
We've just loosened up a little on...
376
00:13:29,857 --> 00:13:31,993
Societal constructions.
377
00:13:32,042 --> 00:13:33,946
It makes it all much more interesting.
378
00:13:33,995 --> 00:13:35,436
What's the point of
being interesting now?
379
00:13:35,484 --> 00:13:36,588
You're 70.
380
00:13:36,637 --> 00:13:38,095
Well, it's now or never.
381
00:13:38,244 --> 00:13:39,602
Yeah, I guess. I'm sorry.
382
00:13:39,651 --> 00:13:42,891
- It's just been a lot.
- It's OK. Good girl.
383
00:13:42,939 --> 00:13:45,894
James isn't the best sleeper.
Work's been slow.
384
00:13:46,168 --> 00:13:49,617
And Nora's... moved back in with us.
385
00:13:51,814 --> 00:13:53,968
Do you want to see
my pictures from Burning Man?
386
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,938
Oh... I'd rather die.
387
00:13:57,006 --> 00:13:59,240
Well, that's not really
the spirit of Burning Man.
388
00:13:59,334 --> 00:14:01,224
I'm trying to tell you something here.
389
00:14:01,273 --> 00:14:03,027
All right. What?
390
00:14:04,456 --> 00:14:07,246
I'm overwhelmed.
391
00:14:08,561 --> 00:14:10,435
And I need my Mom.
392
00:14:10,610 --> 00:14:12,404
Oh, Davie, I didn't realize.
393
00:14:12,460 --> 00:14:13,654
I'm...
394
00:14:13,703 --> 00:14:15,752
You know,
you've always been so self-sufficient.
395
00:14:16,129 --> 00:14:17,694
Well, I mean,
it's just everything seems to be
396
00:14:17,743 --> 00:14:20,099
a bit of a grind right
now and there's just...
397
00:14:20,467 --> 00:14:22,638
There's just no end in sight.
398
00:14:22,828 --> 00:14:24,162
You know what you need?
399
00:14:24,272 --> 00:14:27,123
- Oh, God. What?
- A holiday.
400
00:14:27,982 --> 00:14:29,804
With what time?
401
00:14:29,914 --> 00:14:32,549
- What money?
- All right. You just hold on.
402
00:14:36,365 --> 00:14:38,348
- On the fridge.
- Ah!
403
00:14:39,552 --> 00:14:41,883
And... here.
404
00:14:42,138 --> 00:14:43,537
What's this?
405
00:14:43,631 --> 00:14:46,162
A few months ago, we had all
the locks changed in the house
406
00:14:46,211 --> 00:14:48,165
because your sisters kept
dropping by with all their kids
407
00:14:48,214 --> 00:14:50,985
for free babysitting, but I want you...
408
00:14:51,034 --> 00:14:53,895
- To have these.
- Why?
409
00:14:54,027 --> 00:14:56,006
We'll be away, so you can come here
410
00:14:56,055 --> 00:14:58,474
whenever you need
to decompress. You can...
411
00:14:58,883 --> 00:15:00,347
Have a boys night. You can...
412
00:15:00,396 --> 00:15:02,704
Play video games.
You can use the hot tub.
413
00:15:02,849 --> 00:15:04,810
- Say what? You got a hot tub?
- Yup.
414
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:07,342
- And it's clothing optional.
- Ah...
415
00:15:07,687 --> 00:15:09,588
That's neat.
416
00:15:11,561 --> 00:15:13,481
I love you, Davie.
417
00:15:14,623 --> 00:15:16,261
I love you too, Mom.
418
00:15:16,404 --> 00:15:18,052
Come-Oh! [LAUGHS]
419
00:15:18,100 --> 00:15:19,868
How often do you clean
the water in that hot tub?
420
00:15:20,427 --> 00:15:24,325
Here to perform her new hit,
"Hot Mess," Jann Arden!
421
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:28,044
- [APPLAUSE AND CHEERING]
- [INAUDIBLE SPEAKING]
422
00:15:31,930 --> 00:15:34,865
[ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS]
423
00:15:41,991 --> 00:15:43,778
? ?
424
00:15:44,429 --> 00:15:45,732
I'm-I'm so sorry.
425
00:15:45,781 --> 00:15:47,682
I'm so sorry.
Can we just stop the track?
426
00:15:47,730 --> 00:15:49,017
Can we just stop the tr...
427
00:15:49,105 --> 00:15:51,830
I'm so sorry. I, uh,
428
00:15:51,968 --> 00:15:53,063
I'm just not feeling it.
429
00:15:53,112 --> 00:15:55,890
You know,
in the spirit of-of-of self-care,
430
00:15:55,938 --> 00:15:57,725
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
What is happening?
431
00:15:57,773 --> 00:15:59,946
I'm, uh, I'm gonna do a song
432
00:15:59,995 --> 00:16:02,188
that I actually kind of like
and that I'm proud of.
433
00:16:02,237 --> 00:16:04,927
Oh, hell no.
434
00:16:07,697 --> 00:16:09,234
So...
435
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:10,950
Hope you like it.
436
00:16:11,531 --> 00:16:13,547
? Take your coat ?
437
00:16:13,663 --> 00:16:17,386
? And shoes off ?
438
00:16:19,304 --> 00:16:21,782
? Come and sit ?
439
00:16:21,831 --> 00:16:23,665
? Beside me ?
440
00:16:26,128 --> 00:16:28,983
? We could talk ?
441
00:16:29,633 --> 00:16:31,367
? For hours ?
442
00:16:33,676 --> 00:16:37,172
? Or we could just ?
443
00:16:37,313 --> 00:16:39,314
? Do nothing ?
444
00:16:41,851 --> 00:16:47,570
? Four billion people surround us ?
445
00:16:49,662 --> 00:16:52,770
? So many souls ?
446
00:16:52,858 --> 00:16:57,415
? Lose their way ?
447
00:16:57,659 --> 00:17:00,562
? All that we have ?
448
00:17:00,822 --> 00:17:04,247
? Is each other ?
449
00:17:04,340 --> 00:17:08,281
? And that's all I ?
450
00:17:08,362 --> 00:17:10,887
? Ever wanted ?
451
00:17:10,997 --> 00:17:12,817
? Yeah, yeah ?
452
00:17:12,939 --> 00:17:16,361
? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ?
453
00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:21,110
? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ?
454
00:17:21,329 --> 00:17:23,150
[APPLAUSE AND CHEERING]
455
00:17:24,247 --> 00:17:25,647
Thanks, everybody.
456
00:17:25,945 --> 00:17:28,479
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS]
457
00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:34,639
? The Insight ?
458
00:17:39,450 --> 00:17:41,287
That crap you pulled
was way out of line.
459
00:17:41,380 --> 00:17:43,935
Maybe you're still not clear
on the definition of self-care.
460
00:17:44,124 --> 00:17:45,247
I'm well aware,
461
00:17:45,296 --> 00:17:46,349
but what you need to understand
462
00:17:46,398 --> 00:17:47,700
is what you did wasn't self-care.
463
00:17:47,749 --> 00:17:48,794
It was self-ish.
464
00:17:48,843 --> 00:17:50,466
Sadly, that's kind of your zone.
465
00:17:50,515 --> 00:17:51,948
Oh, you are way off base.
466
00:17:51,996 --> 00:17:53,848
I think I'll walk this time.
467
00:17:53,897 --> 00:17:55,185
- Whoa!
- Not happening.
468
00:17:55,234 --> 00:17:57,536
Your feeble frame is
my ticket to more legroom
469
00:17:57,585 --> 00:17:59,036
and an upgraded snack.
470
00:17:59,085 --> 00:18:00,723
- You're the selfish one.
- No, I'm not.
471
00:18:00,772 --> 00:18:03,022
Hey, Cale, so they didn't
have any gluten-free options,
472
00:18:03,071 --> 00:18:04,124
- so I...
- Then keep looking!
473
00:18:05,529 --> 00:18:07,382
This isn't over.
474
00:18:07,498 --> 00:18:08,899
[OVER PA]: This is
your pre-boarding call
475
00:18:08,947 --> 00:18:11,085
for Flight 223 to Calgary,
476
00:18:11,134 --> 00:18:13,069
Flight 223 to Calgary.
477
00:18:13,334 --> 00:18:14,929
If you'll excuse me,
478
00:18:15,131 --> 00:18:18,978
my sad, tired geriatric
of a mom needs me.
479
00:18:21,264 --> 00:18:23,302
- Hey.
- Hi.
480
00:18:23,698 --> 00:18:25,076
How did it go with your mom?
481
00:18:25,170 --> 00:18:26,716
Oh, as expected.
482
00:18:26,764 --> 00:18:28,358
Uh-oh.
483
00:18:28,615 --> 00:18:30,357
Yeah. She means well,
484
00:18:30,406 --> 00:18:32,022
but it's just crazy how Nora's
485
00:18:32,071 --> 00:18:34,069
so involved with the kids and
486
00:18:34,118 --> 00:18:35,787
wants to spend as much
time as she can with us.
487
00:18:35,836 --> 00:18:38,016
And then there's my mom, who's...
488
00:18:38,076 --> 00:18:40,613
toying with the idea
of joining a nudist colony.
489
00:18:40,678 --> 00:18:41,756
- Again?
- Yeah.
490
00:18:41,805 --> 00:18:43,139
It seems cyclical, doesn't it?
491
00:18:43,188 --> 00:18:45,842
Well,
your mom's always been a bit of a flake.
492
00:18:45,891 --> 00:18:49,305
I mean,
maybe that is why you are so reliable.
493
00:18:49,442 --> 00:18:50,538
Awesome.
494
00:18:50,587 --> 00:18:53,092
I love being Mr. Reliable
Caregiver Man.
495
00:18:53,141 --> 00:18:55,037
It's very, very sexy.
496
00:18:55,086 --> 00:18:56,153
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
497
00:18:56,202 --> 00:18:58,415
Is it as sexy as this...
498
00:18:59,936 --> 00:19:02,852
this sculpture of chanterelles
my dad made in pottery class?
499
00:19:03,068 --> 00:19:05,161
Well, it doesn't look
a lot like a mushroom.
500
00:19:05,225 --> 00:19:06,842
You know what?
You're right. It does not.
501
00:19:06,891 --> 00:19:08,686
Please hide that in the garbage.
502
00:19:08,735 --> 00:19:10,352
Oh, OK. Done.
503
00:19:10,966 --> 00:19:12,248
You need a break.
504
00:19:12,297 --> 00:19:13,319
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
505
00:19:13,368 --> 00:19:14,513
What'd you have in mind?
506
00:19:14,562 --> 00:19:16,998
Why don't I get her in her crib,
507
00:19:17,047 --> 00:19:19,156
and then you and I hop in the shower?
508
00:19:19,216 --> 00:19:21,874
Or... I lay down
509
00:19:21,923 --> 00:19:23,209
and you make out with me.
510
00:19:23,258 --> 00:19:26,055
- Oh! Done.
- [DAVE CHUCKLES]
511
00:19:29,830 --> 00:19:31,731
[PHONE RINGING]
512
00:19:33,959 --> 00:19:36,381
- Oh, hey.
- Jann, I caught the show.
513
00:19:36,443 --> 00:19:38,657
- The song was amazing!
- You liked it?
514
00:19:38,706 --> 00:19:40,330
I'm glad you worked it out with Cale.
515
00:19:40,397 --> 00:19:41,811
Boarding pass?
516
00:19:42,844 --> 00:19:44,842
Yeah, um, singing the song
517
00:19:44,891 --> 00:19:46,295
was more of a spontaneous
518
00:19:46,344 --> 00:19:47,905
off-the-cuff kind of
a thing. I didn't...
519
00:19:47,967 --> 00:19:49,748
I didn't really run it past Cale.
520
00:19:50,427 --> 00:19:52,639
- Oh, one of those?
- One of what?
521
00:19:52,717 --> 00:19:54,085
Open to the picture page.
522
00:19:54,134 --> 00:19:55,304
I called it 'Janning-it'.
523
00:19:55,352 --> 00:19:57,540
Never thought I'd say this
but poor Cale.
524
00:19:57,588 --> 00:19:59,909
Those weren't my favourite
moments managing you.
525
00:19:59,957 --> 00:20:01,828
Oh, come on!
526
00:20:02,114 --> 00:20:04,097
It's frustrating because I can't
527
00:20:04,146 --> 00:20:06,457
manipulate Cale the
way I could with you.
528
00:20:06,506 --> 00:20:09,034
- What do you mean?
- I got you to write my memoir, Todd!
529
00:20:09,083 --> 00:20:10,300
In my memory, I offered.
530
00:20:10,349 --> 00:20:11,621
Plus, you gave me the dedication.
531
00:20:11,669 --> 00:20:14,323
- You gave it to yourself!
- In my memory, you offered.
532
00:20:14,371 --> 00:20:16,621
Yeah, I'll be home soon, Cynthia.
533
00:20:16,731 --> 00:20:19,007
- I love you.
- I love you too, Jann!
534
00:20:20,344 --> 00:20:22,150
- Have a nice flight.
- Thank you.
535
00:20:22,848 --> 00:20:24,450
We're scheduled to film a music video
536
00:20:24,499 --> 00:20:25,856
for the single in the next few days.
537
00:20:25,905 --> 00:20:27,138
Can I assume you will actually
538
00:20:27,187 --> 00:20:28,427
follow through on the plan this time?
539
00:20:28,475 --> 00:20:29,393
Yes, yes!
540
00:20:29,442 --> 00:20:32,611
- This is my verbal confirmation.
- OK, good.
541
00:20:32,660 --> 00:20:34,106
Now,
I'm gonna get on that plane and watch
542
00:20:34,155 --> 00:20:35,826
four episodes of Deadliest Catch.
543
00:20:35,875 --> 00:20:37,496
Self-care.
544
00:20:38,194 --> 00:20:40,278
Hang on, I'm gonna ride you
down the ramp, Mom!
545
00:20:40,327 --> 00:20:41,764
Woohoo!
546
00:20:42,944 --> 00:20:45,085
I'm having one of the
worst hot-flashes of my life.
547
00:20:45,134 --> 00:20:46,913
You could fry eggs on my stomach.
548
00:20:46,962 --> 00:20:48,538
I'm like a human Crock-Pot.
549
00:20:48,587 --> 00:20:50,280
Is there AC in here?
550
00:20:51,256 --> 00:20:54,967
Water is, is literally running
like a river thought my boobs.
551
00:20:55,016 --> 00:20:56,827
My God,
it's going down the crack of my arse.
552
00:20:57,257 --> 00:20:58,819
Can I get electrocuted in here?
553
00:20:58,868 --> 00:21:00,264
Is there any air?
554
00:21:00,313 --> 00:21:02,272
Hello? There is no AC in here.
555
00:21:03,382 --> 00:21:05,030
Jesus Christ!
556
00:21:05,085 --> 00:21:07,217
I just need someone
in here to pull a sleeve.
557
00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:09,733
Could I get someone
in here to pull a sleeve?
558
00:21:10,171 --> 00:21:14,171
synced & corrected by PopcornAWH
www.addic7ed.com
559
00:21:15,114 --> 00:21:16,412
I'm bring my A game.
560
00:21:16,461 --> 00:21:18,144
I'm getting botox.
I'm getting a blowout.
561
00:21:18,193 --> 00:21:19,716
I'm doing the whole works.
562
00:21:20,013 --> 00:21:21,128
Really?
563
00:21:21,755 --> 00:21:23,278
?
564
00:21:24,084 --> 00:21:25,918
Look at my bum!
565
00:21:26,020 --> 00:21:28,087
Can't talk now Max, I'm covered
in balls.
566
00:21:28,396 --> 00:21:31,391
Don't really know how to do a robot.
567
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:32,490
Oh!
568
00:21:32,539 --> 00:21:34,292
I don't want to do it.
569
00:21:34,348 --> 00:21:36,282
What if I have gas.
570
00:21:36,332 --> 00:21:40,882
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
40841
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.