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1
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♪ ♪
2
00:00:08,349 --> 00:00:09,847
[WOMAN]: Is that a mullet?
3
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Oh, anything with a unibrow
goes in the No Pile.
4
00:00:13,880 --> 00:00:15,731
We're not gonna have
any pictures of me from, like,
5
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- age 8 to 13.
- [LAUGHING]
6
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Oh, my Lord. This is so embarrassing.
7
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Oh, God!
8
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[LAUGHING]: When was that?
9
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This was 1982, Mom.
10
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- Remember, we went to Niagara Falls?
- Right.
11
00:00:31,290 --> 00:00:32,614
That is also the year,
12
00:00:32,663 --> 00:00:34,271
you permed my hair
at the kitchen table.
13
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:36,130
It feels hot, Mom.
14
00:00:36,179 --> 00:00:38,542
I'm following the instructions.
15
00:00:38,725 --> 00:00:40,280
♪ ♪
16
00:00:40,447 --> 00:00:41,860
Oh, yes.
17
00:00:41,908 --> 00:00:44,262
This took me four years to grow out.
18
00:00:45,073 --> 00:00:49,051
Mom, this has got to be 30 years ago.
19
00:00:49,107 --> 00:00:51,251
Oh, my gosh!
20
00:00:52,852 --> 00:00:54,673
[BOTH]: ♪ Sister, mother, warrior girl ♪
21
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:56,148
♪ Taking on the whole wide world. ♪
22
00:00:56,197 --> 00:00:59,211
♪ We got lessons to bestow ♪
♪ G-i-r-l go-go-go ♪
23
00:00:59,259 --> 00:01:02,118
♪ Go, girls, go Go, girls, go ♪
24
00:01:02,197 --> 00:01:04,282
No, that's not the song.
25
00:01:04,548 --> 00:01:06,902
- Well, I wasn't in Go Girls.
- [NORA]: You were.
26
00:01:06,951 --> 00:01:09,253
You quit after three hours.
27
00:01:09,302 --> 00:01:10,864
Maybe this girl wasn't going anywhere.
28
00:01:10,913 --> 00:01:12,290
Well, I loved it.
29
00:01:12,338 --> 00:01:13,964
I went through all
the badges so quickly,
30
00:01:14,013 --> 00:01:16,306
they had to make a
new one: know-it-all.
31
00:01:16,355 --> 00:01:17,896
Figures.
32
00:01:18,075 --> 00:01:20,521
Do you think
I'll ever go camping again?
33
00:01:20,592 --> 00:01:22,517
Realistically, Mom, probably not.
34
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Jann!
35
00:01:24,150 --> 00:01:26,084
♪ Aaah ♪
36
00:01:28,258 --> 00:01:30,282
Hey, guys! Happy Friday!
37
00:01:30,331 --> 00:01:32,122
So I wanna hear your suggestions:
38
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what should I do this weekend?
39
00:01:33,665 --> 00:01:36,409
Oh! We're going camping.
40
00:01:36,545 --> 00:01:38,639
- Oh, you are?
- We...
41
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The whole family.
42
00:01:39,829 --> 00:01:41,574
Oh... yeah. I wasn't
43
00:01:41,623 --> 00:01:43,665
really looking for
suggestions from you,
44
00:01:43,714 --> 00:01:45,281
but I will take a couple of
45
00:01:45,330 --> 00:01:46,719
those powdered beer packets.
46
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You're coming.
47
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I found the most beautiful campsite.
48
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How beautiful?
Like 100 likes beautiful,
49
00:01:52,215 --> 00:01:54,014
or like 500 likes beautiful?
50
00:01:54,063 --> 00:01:57,135
Like sliding into DMs beautiful.
51
00:01:57,446 --> 00:01:59,004
Do you even know what that means?
52
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- Not really, no.
- I do.
53
00:02:02,255 --> 00:02:04,172
OK, so you're coming.
54
00:02:04,924 --> 00:02:06,803
Well, people want to see me go camping.
55
00:02:06,852 --> 00:02:08,486
I guess I'm going.
56
00:02:08,661 --> 00:02:10,482
- Hey, going where?
- Camping.
57
00:02:10,625 --> 00:02:12,963
WE are going camping.
58
00:02:13,084 --> 00:02:14,670
It's a little late in the season,
isn't it?
59
00:02:14,719 --> 00:02:16,113
It's supposed to snow on Sunday.
60
00:02:16,162 --> 00:02:17,971
Yep, and it's not optional.
61
00:02:18,099 --> 00:02:19,549
Alright, cool.
62
00:02:19,869 --> 00:02:21,056
Cool!
63
00:02:21,113 --> 00:02:22,760
We found that. Picture on the fridge.
64
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Mom's coming too.
65
00:02:24,200 --> 00:02:26,262
Oh, my God! You look so...
66
00:02:26,509 --> 00:02:28,621
Weird, but happy.
67
00:02:28,963 --> 00:02:30,219
I'm happy if you're happy.
68
00:02:30,268 --> 00:02:32,924
♪ Go, go, girl! Go, go, go, girl ♪
69
00:02:32,981 --> 00:02:35,531
♪ G-i-r-l-s Go and... ♪
70
00:02:35,731 --> 00:02:36,964
♪ Go, girl ♪
71
00:02:37,394 --> 00:02:39,828
Yeah, so that's still
totally not the song.
72
00:02:39,877 --> 00:02:41,901
Whatever, Max. It's
very close to what the song was.
73
00:02:41,950 --> 00:02:44,382
So have you and Cyn
been roped into this spontaneous,
74
00:02:44,430 --> 00:02:46,145
yet totally not optional camping trip?
75
00:02:46,194 --> 00:02:47,476
I'm actually looking forward to it,
76
00:02:47,525 --> 00:02:49,174
'cause it will get me out
of couples counselling.
77
00:02:49,223 --> 00:02:50,407
Snuggle time!
78
00:02:50,456 --> 00:02:53,075
You're watching
your favourite Netflix show now.
79
00:02:53,124 --> 00:02:54,678
Very nice. Super.
80
00:02:54,933 --> 00:02:56,983
Super. Super. FIRE!
81
00:02:57,032 --> 00:02:58,366
THERE'S A FIRE!
82
00:02:58,415 --> 00:03:01,209
- Run! Save the baby!
- I have my baby!
83
00:03:01,258 --> 00:03:03,004
- Give me the baby.
- Protect the baby!
84
00:03:03,053 --> 00:03:04,828
Don't smother. Good.
85
00:03:05,896 --> 00:03:08,153
Camping over counselling?
You are so mature.
86
00:03:08,202 --> 00:03:09,951
I know you are but what am I?
87
00:03:10,323 --> 00:03:12,945
Oh! What am I eating?
88
00:03:12,994 --> 00:03:14,619
Dehydrated paella.
89
00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:18,666
Holy!
90
00:03:18,715 --> 00:03:19,884
Terrible! [JANN SPITTING]
91
00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:21,753
- OK...
- OK. Dave,
92
00:03:22,395 --> 00:03:24,235
- you're on pyre duty.
- Pyre?
93
00:03:24,284 --> 00:03:26,015
OK, guys, so...
94
00:03:26,064 --> 00:03:27,973
I got all your suggestions
to go camping,
95
00:03:28,022 --> 00:03:30,749
so that's what I am doing this weekend.
96
00:03:30,798 --> 00:03:32,336
Let me know what you think
I should pack
97
00:03:32,385 --> 00:03:34,624
in the comments down below.
98
00:03:35,538 --> 00:03:38,122
And, Jann, you're on provisions.
99
00:03:38,407 --> 00:03:40,705
- You mean food?
- It's provisions.
100
00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:42,541
Yes, but that's food, no?
101
00:03:42,590 --> 00:03:44,070
- Still provisions.
- [JANN]: You mean food.
102
00:03:44,118 --> 00:03:45,777
Just get the food, Jann.
103
00:03:45,936 --> 00:03:47,805
♪ ♪
104
00:03:52,061 --> 00:03:53,617
No way. Pick a favourite.
105
00:03:53,666 --> 00:03:54,948
Pick a favourite kid.
106
00:03:54,997 --> 00:03:56,987
I don't negotiate with tiny terrorists.
107
00:03:57,100 --> 00:04:00,500
- Pick one.
- [GIRLS LAUGHING]
108
00:04:03,977 --> 00:04:06,112
And the terrorists have won.
109
00:04:07,184 --> 00:04:08,466
- Mom?
- Hmm?
110
00:04:08,514 --> 00:04:09,981
I have a surprise for you.
111
00:04:11,069 --> 00:04:14,335
- [NORA GASPING]
- I found these in my camping supplies!
112
00:04:14,408 --> 00:04:17,058
- Maxi!
- Can we wear them camping?
113
00:04:17,540 --> 00:04:19,582
[BOTH]: Go, girls, go!
114
00:04:19,684 --> 00:04:21,034
[CHUCKLING]
115
00:04:21,083 --> 00:04:22,881
Oh, my God! No, no!
Mom, put your shirt back on!
116
00:04:23,167 --> 00:04:24,389
Oh, I'm sorry.
117
00:04:24,438 --> 00:04:26,351
I completely forgot I
wasn't wearing a bra.
118
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- Hmmm...
- ♪ ♪
119
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[NORA]: Come on, girls.
120
00:04:36,584 --> 00:04:37,708
- Let's get to work!
- Okay.
121
00:04:37,757 --> 00:04:40,765
It's cold. You know, it's not
too late to change your mind.
122
00:04:40,956 --> 00:04:42,777
Don't be such a stick in the mud.
123
00:04:43,237 --> 00:04:45,372
Stick in the snow.
124
00:04:46,686 --> 00:04:49,040
[INAUDIBLE SPEAKING]
125
00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:50,909
Oh, look!
126
00:04:51,083 --> 00:04:54,147
The Jann and Cynthia
psycho theatre has begun.
127
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:56,082
Not necessarily.
128
00:04:56,131 --> 00:04:58,630
She could just be singing
the theme song to Ghostbusters.
129
00:04:58,877 --> 00:05:01,406
[BABY CRYING]
130
00:05:01,455 --> 00:05:03,907
Still, camping over
counselling? Come on.
131
00:05:03,956 --> 00:05:06,124
- Camping over everything!
- Yeah, yeah.
132
00:05:06,172 --> 00:05:07,487
It's not because I don't think
133
00:05:07,536 --> 00:05:09,342
- your feelings are valid!
- Oh, really?
134
00:05:09,391 --> 00:05:12,021
I just think you're totally
wrong and completely off base!
135
00:05:12,070 --> 00:05:14,345
- You're ridiculous!
- You are delusional!
136
00:05:14,655 --> 00:05:16,307
What are you two fighting about now?
137
00:05:16,356 --> 00:05:18,268
The average serving size
of peanut butter.
138
00:05:19,168 --> 00:05:20,455
- Right.
- Is it really hot out here?
139
00:05:20,504 --> 00:05:22,324
I feel like I'm having a hot flash.
140
00:05:22,562 --> 00:05:23,935
Give me the keys to the car.
141
00:05:23,984 --> 00:05:25,193
I need the AC.
142
00:05:25,242 --> 00:05:27,433
I am burning up! I'll be just a minute.
143
00:05:27,482 --> 00:05:28,813
[BOTH]: Take your time.
144
00:05:28,861 --> 00:05:31,216
- [NORA]: All secure.
- [GIRL]: OK, Gram.
145
00:05:31,418 --> 00:05:33,885
- What are you doing?
- I'm orienting the tents
146
00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:35,754
due east so that we can
wake up with the sun!
147
00:05:36,353 --> 00:05:39,539
- Ah, thanks, Ma.
- Look at you.
148
00:05:39,806 --> 00:05:41,893
[YOUNG GIRL 1]:
Oh, I got my hands all dirty.
149
00:05:41,941 --> 00:05:43,701
[YOUNG GIRL 2]: Let's
gather up some of these leaves.
150
00:05:43,749 --> 00:05:45,163
[NORA]: Ah, good idea.
151
00:05:45,234 --> 00:05:47,370
♪ ♪
152
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Aaaah...
153
00:05:56,844 --> 00:06:00,114
- Aah.
- Unbelievable.
154
00:06:00,390 --> 00:06:01,803
Brachythecium rivulare?
155
00:06:01,852 --> 00:06:04,522
Close, but no. Fontinalis Antipyretica.
156
00:06:04,630 --> 00:06:06,711
- Of course.
- [NORA]: Mm-hmm.
157
00:06:07,053 --> 00:06:09,674
- Which means...
- It's edible!
158
00:06:09,754 --> 00:06:12,333
- Yeah, it is.
- Yeah. Hoohoo!
159
00:06:12,627 --> 00:06:15,078
- Unbelievable.
- Come on, catch it.
160
00:06:15,127 --> 00:06:16,499
Not so close!
161
00:06:16,690 --> 00:06:19,851
Auntie J doesn't like balls
near her face, remember?!
162
00:06:19,900 --> 00:06:20,968
Hey, guys!
163
00:06:21,017 --> 00:06:22,803
So according to the poll,
164
00:06:22,852 --> 00:06:24,034
this is the makeup look that you
165
00:06:24,083 --> 00:06:25,451
wanted me to go camping in.
166
00:06:25,500 --> 00:06:27,321
- It is...
- [GIRLS LAUGHING]
167
00:06:27,475 --> 00:06:29,367
...the Pumpkin Spice palette
168
00:06:29,416 --> 00:06:31,247
and I highly recommend it.
169
00:06:31,342 --> 00:06:33,262
Hmm... needs something.
170
00:06:33,484 --> 00:06:34,580
- Salt.
- Hmm,
171
00:06:34,629 --> 00:06:36,614
I didn't expect it to be so sharp.
172
00:06:37,217 --> 00:06:39,333
In taste and texture.
173
00:06:39,512 --> 00:06:41,595
Now, what I think I'm tasting is...
174
00:06:41,676 --> 00:06:42,802
Blood.
175
00:06:45,533 --> 00:06:47,025
[CYNTHIA SIGHING]
176
00:06:47,302 --> 00:06:49,928
- You want a beer?
- Oh, absolutely.
177
00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:55,300
You know, I think this could be fun.
178
00:06:55,348 --> 00:06:57,138
Come to Mama!
179
00:06:58,551 --> 00:07:00,537
[GRUNTING AND SIGHING]
180
00:07:00,730 --> 00:07:02,276
What a waste!
181
00:07:02,435 --> 00:07:04,070
Son of a bowling ball!
182
00:07:04,197 --> 00:07:06,059
- [GRUNTING]
- [BANJO MUSIC]
183
00:07:06,138 --> 00:07:07,794
Uh-oh!
184
00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:10,930
Oh! Ah...
185
00:07:13,961 --> 00:07:15,906
Ugh!
186
00:07:16,245 --> 00:07:19,133
Oh... Ah, ah, ah, oh,
187
00:07:19,284 --> 00:07:21,953
ohhh... Ah!
188
00:07:28,981 --> 00:07:31,184
Ah, oh!
189
00:07:31,384 --> 00:07:32,920
Oh my God!
190
00:07:33,252 --> 00:07:36,640
Ah! Geez!
191
00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:40,145
Ah! Ah.
192
00:07:40,470 --> 00:07:43,139
Oh... God.
193
00:07:47,084 --> 00:07:48,872
Wilderness safety!
194
00:07:48,921 --> 00:07:51,867
OK. So, if you see a bear...
195
00:07:51,916 --> 00:07:54,392
You stop it, drop it and roll it!
196
00:07:54,441 --> 00:07:56,376
OK, so that's for a fire.
197
00:07:56,864 --> 00:07:58,951
You don't want to roll a bear.
198
00:07:59,048 --> 00:08:00,798
OK, but if you do see a bear,
199
00:08:00,847 --> 00:08:02,834
you must avoid eye contact.
200
00:08:02,882 --> 00:08:04,505
No. If you see a bear,
201
00:08:04,554 --> 00:08:06,695
you should look it dead in the eye.
202
00:08:06,744 --> 00:08:08,074
Now, if you see a cougar...
203
00:08:08,123 --> 00:08:10,525
Well, if you see a cougar,
you're already dead.
204
00:08:11,778 --> 00:08:13,336
I mean, they stalk their prey,
205
00:08:13,385 --> 00:08:14,899
and then by the time you see it,
206
00:08:14,948 --> 00:08:16,928
it's already ripping out your jugular.
207
00:08:18,654 --> 00:08:20,235
Max, come on.
208
00:08:20,377 --> 00:08:23,121
OK. Possibly your carotid artery.
209
00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:25,256
Alright, why don't we lay off
the violent-death speech?
210
00:08:25,304 --> 00:08:27,379
But it's how you
earn the Bravery badge.
211
00:08:27,428 --> 00:08:28,726
Yeah, OK.
212
00:08:29,473 --> 00:08:32,464
Who wants some advice
that doesn't involve death?
213
00:08:32,829 --> 00:08:34,672
What's the point, Dave?
214
00:08:34,932 --> 00:08:37,139
"Leaves of three, let it be."
215
00:08:37,188 --> 00:08:39,406
Thought weed was legal now!
216
00:08:39,868 --> 00:08:42,065
If a plant has three leaves,
it's poison ivy.
217
00:08:42,114 --> 00:08:44,303
But general rule is stay
away from anything in threes.
218
00:08:44,352 --> 00:08:46,344
It's never as fun as you think
it's gonna be, kids.
219
00:08:46,392 --> 00:08:48,337
OK. Thank you for that.
220
00:08:48,386 --> 00:08:50,930
Maybe you could go to the
car and get the provisions.
221
00:08:56,429 --> 00:08:57,766
Jann...
222
00:08:57,886 --> 00:09:00,711
- Could you get the provisions?
- Kind of busy right here, Max.
223
00:09:01,761 --> 00:09:03,315
Fine. Cynthia,
224
00:09:03,364 --> 00:09:06,359
can you help me get the provisions?
225
00:09:06,662 --> 00:09:07,765
[HANDLE JANGLING]
226
00:09:07,814 --> 00:09:09,845
It's locked. We need the keys.
227
00:09:09,975 --> 00:09:12,384
It's OK. It's a simple matter
of going through my pockets.
228
00:09:12,473 --> 00:09:14,150
They're definitely here.
229
00:09:18,772 --> 00:09:20,860
That is a surprising amount of garbage.
230
00:09:20,909 --> 00:09:22,014
Are these my pants?
231
00:09:22,063 --> 00:09:23,712
I don't think these are my pants!
232
00:09:25,631 --> 00:09:27,185
You locked the keys in the car!
233
00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,846
Nooo!
234
00:09:29,544 --> 00:09:31,285
The provisions!
235
00:09:31,868 --> 00:09:33,736
That means food!
236
00:09:36,805 --> 00:09:37,924
Wow!
237
00:09:37,973 --> 00:09:39,700
You locked the keys in the car!
238
00:09:41,082 --> 00:09:42,229
I feel,
239
00:09:42,278 --> 00:09:43,499
like this is an example
240
00:09:43,548 --> 00:09:45,315
of you not paying attention
to things that matter
241
00:09:45,364 --> 00:09:48,110
and as a result, I feel pissed.
242
00:09:48,237 --> 00:09:51,009
Ok, cool. I see what you're doing
there. You're using therapy language.
243
00:09:51,670 --> 00:09:53,271
Cynthia, I hear you,
244
00:09:53,432 --> 00:09:55,520
and I really appreciate your feelings.
245
00:09:56,438 --> 00:09:57,700
- Thank you.
- BUT I would not
246
00:09:57,749 --> 00:09:59,018
be serving my own spirit,
247
00:09:59,067 --> 00:10:00,732
if I didn't express
248
00:10:00,781 --> 00:10:02,738
just how much this is your fault!
249
00:10:02,787 --> 00:10:04,358
You were the one driving the car,
therefore
250
00:10:04,407 --> 00:10:05,763
the keys are your responsibility!
251
00:10:05,812 --> 00:10:07,134
You got back in the car
252
00:10:07,183 --> 00:10:08,349
to turn on the air conditioning.
253
00:10:08,398 --> 00:10:09,961
I have a medical condition!
254
00:10:10,147 --> 00:10:11,203
I'll call Rhonda;
255
00:10:11,252 --> 00:10:12,774
she's been breaking into cars since,
256
00:10:12,823 --> 00:10:14,147
the early nineties.
257
00:10:14,196 --> 00:10:15,489
We don't have any food?
258
00:10:15,538 --> 00:10:16,901
Guys, guys,
259
00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:19,037
this is not a problem, OK?
260
00:10:19,085 --> 00:10:21,745
Mom and I, we will just
forage for food!
261
00:10:21,794 --> 00:10:23,354
- [NORA]: Fantastic!
- Oh, my God.
262
00:10:23,403 --> 00:10:25,385
We're all gonna die.
263
00:10:25,751 --> 00:10:28,196
OK, I'm giving you
two hours for your little adventure,
264
00:10:28,245 --> 00:10:29,645
and then I'm gonna
take our insufferable,
265
00:10:29,693 --> 00:10:31,501
angry children for McNuggets.
266
00:10:31,602 --> 00:10:32,776
- Yeah.
- Let's go, Mom.
267
00:10:32,856 --> 00:10:35,259
[BOTH]: Go, girls, go!
268
00:10:35,604 --> 00:10:38,838
- Girls, be gone!
- [JANN]: Can't with those two.
269
00:10:41,388 --> 00:10:45,197
Cynthia, can you please
come with me into the woods?
270
00:10:45,620 --> 00:10:46,767
Why?
271
00:10:46,848 --> 00:10:48,744
Because all the stress has triggered
272
00:10:48,793 --> 00:10:50,268
something, and my body is
273
00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:52,136
on the doorstep of a situation.
274
00:10:52,453 --> 00:10:54,806
Is it the stress or is it
the three bags of turkey jerky?
275
00:10:54,854 --> 00:10:56,328
I am gonna crap my pants;
276
00:10:56,377 --> 00:10:57,722
can you not come and protect me
277
00:10:57,771 --> 00:10:59,994
from having my
carotid artery ripped off?
278
00:11:00,065 --> 00:11:02,280
- Fine.
- None of this feels good.
279
00:11:02,812 --> 00:11:06,091
Hey, guys! So, update, my tent is up.
280
00:11:06,174 --> 00:11:07,737
Here's the rest of the camp.
281
00:11:07,895 --> 00:11:10,236
A lot of work
to be done still, obviously.
282
00:11:10,334 --> 00:11:12,156
Say hi, Dave!
283
00:11:12,544 --> 00:11:14,413
- Dave?
- [BANJO MUSIC]
284
00:11:19,250 --> 00:11:20,576
I thought this was urgent.
285
00:11:20,625 --> 00:11:22,463
- What's wrong with right here?
- It's too exposed.
286
00:11:22,512 --> 00:11:24,216
We need to go deeper.
287
00:11:24,427 --> 00:11:25,714
This is a joke.
288
00:11:25,818 --> 00:11:28,799
FYI, no one LOLs at IBS.
289
00:11:29,893 --> 00:11:31,424
I love this.
290
00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:34,753
The water, fishing with my girl.
291
00:11:34,802 --> 00:11:37,344
Haha! It's been a great day so far.
292
00:11:38,570 --> 00:11:40,594
This is a place to be just us
293
00:11:40,643 --> 00:11:43,562
and the quiet beauty of nature.
294
00:11:43,740 --> 00:11:45,682
Am I gonna dig or do you wanna do it?
295
00:11:46,044 --> 00:11:47,436
This is super private.
296
00:11:47,572 --> 00:11:49,799
- [NORA]: Oh, look who it is!
- Don't cross it.
297
00:11:50,025 --> 00:11:51,925
[NORA]: What are they up to?
298
00:11:51,974 --> 00:11:53,186
Not to be too graphic,
299
00:11:53,235 --> 00:11:55,633
but the toilet paper was a "provision"
300
00:11:55,682 --> 00:11:57,871
and it too is locked in the car.
301
00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:00,545
I'm trying to remain the
slightest bit attracted to you.
302
00:12:00,679 --> 00:12:02,339
Everybody poos, Cynthia!
303
00:12:02,971 --> 00:12:04,629
Is... is this happening?
304
00:12:04,710 --> 00:12:07,177
Uh... I think so.
305
00:12:07,272 --> 00:12:09,092
[GRUMBLING]
306
00:12:09,285 --> 00:12:12,483
I can never not see that.
307
00:12:12,766 --> 00:12:14,687
Oh, my God, I think
I'm having a hot flash!
308
00:12:14,736 --> 00:12:17,141
- Don't look at me!
- No problem!
309
00:12:17,292 --> 00:12:19,962
- [GRUMBLING]
- [JANN]: Oh, God.
310
00:12:21,300 --> 00:12:23,286
Leaves of three...
311
00:12:23,335 --> 00:12:24,388
Oh, Jesus!
312
00:12:24,437 --> 00:12:26,144
- Yep.
- [JANN]: What's happening?
313
00:12:26,193 --> 00:12:27,715
We're surrounded by poison ivy!
314
00:12:27,764 --> 00:12:28,818
We have to get out of here!
315
00:12:28,867 --> 00:12:30,878
I am past the point of no return!
316
00:12:30,927 --> 00:12:32,331
What?! Put your pants on!
317
00:12:32,380 --> 00:12:35,015
I told you these aren't my pants!
318
00:12:35,064 --> 00:12:37,108
Oh! I can't stop!
319
00:12:37,649 --> 00:12:39,518
What the hell?
320
00:12:41,894 --> 00:12:43,170
Girls...
321
00:12:43,925 --> 00:12:45,264
Why is the wood wet?
322
00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:47,402
- It was dirty.
- We washed it!
323
00:12:47,602 --> 00:12:49,319
What did I tell you
about being helpful?
324
00:12:49,466 --> 00:12:51,663
[CHILDREN]: That it makes
your life more difficult.
325
00:12:51,712 --> 00:12:53,841
That it makes my life more difficult.
326
00:12:53,890 --> 00:12:55,460
Did we bring any sunscreen?
327
00:12:55,508 --> 00:12:56,800
[JANN]: Hey, you guys!
328
00:12:56,849 --> 00:12:57,862
[GIRLS SCREAMING]
329
00:12:57,910 --> 00:12:59,135
Oh, my God!
330
00:12:59,184 --> 00:13:01,774
Don't go into the woods,
it's not worth it.
331
00:13:01,958 --> 00:13:04,020
- Am I getting the Jimmy eye?
- Getting?
332
00:13:04,069 --> 00:13:06,100
It's safe to say you got.
333
00:13:06,383 --> 00:13:08,381
- Is this a hive?
- I think it is!
334
00:13:08,430 --> 00:13:10,563
Oh, my God, I have a hive!
I can't handle this!
335
00:13:10,612 --> 00:13:11,834
I can't swallow properly!
336
00:13:11,883 --> 00:13:13,644
That's weird because
I'm about to throw up.
337
00:13:13,693 --> 00:13:14,944
Hey, Dave, in the chaos,
338
00:13:14,993 --> 00:13:16,574
we may have accidentally left
339
00:13:16,623 --> 00:13:17,874
your shovel out there.
340
00:13:17,923 --> 00:13:20,017
I had to go and I dug a hole!
341
00:13:20,065 --> 00:13:21,953
I'm losing vision! I can't see!
342
00:13:22,002 --> 00:13:23,715
I can't handle this! I have a hive!
343
00:13:23,764 --> 00:13:26,152
Honestly, guys,
did anybody bring any sunscreen?
344
00:13:26,201 --> 00:13:28,129
[JANN]: I'm losing vision, people!
345
00:13:28,178 --> 00:13:30,302
- [JANN]: I am losing sight
- Am I in hell?
346
00:13:30,438 --> 00:13:34,700
We got three trout
and some blueberries.
347
00:13:39,225 --> 00:13:41,906
Not one thing has been done.
348
00:13:42,685 --> 00:13:44,025
Now, hold on.
349
00:13:44,105 --> 00:13:46,224
No help, wrong kind of help
350
00:13:46,282 --> 00:13:47,697
and need psychological help!
351
00:13:47,746 --> 00:13:48,987
- Are you talking to me?
- [DAVE]: Yes!
352
00:13:49,035 --> 00:13:50,984
- I'm in therapy!
- You owe me a shovel!
353
00:13:51,033 --> 00:13:52,318
You can shove it right up your...
354
00:13:52,367 --> 00:13:53,975
OK. OK.
355
00:13:54,138 --> 00:13:56,198
Clearly, nobody wants to be here.
356
00:13:56,320 --> 00:13:58,043
[MAX AND NORA]: I do.
357
00:13:58,140 --> 00:14:00,426
- You're the only ones.
- OK.
358
00:14:00,560 --> 00:14:02,072
Fine. I'm done trying.
359
00:14:02,121 --> 00:14:04,401
Just pack it up and we can all go home!
360
00:14:04,486 --> 00:14:05,576
Cool!
361
00:14:05,625 --> 00:14:08,279
Hey, guys! So camping was fun,
what should I do next?
362
00:14:08,414 --> 00:14:10,208
OK, look, I'm surrounded by children,
363
00:14:10,257 --> 00:14:11,315
- I'm doing...
- I just...
364
00:14:11,364 --> 00:14:13,451
Give me a minute. I just need a minute.
365
00:14:17,283 --> 00:14:20,492
- [SPLASHING]
- OK, guys,
366
00:14:20,663 --> 00:14:22,199
let's get going!
367
00:14:22,407 --> 00:14:23,944
[JANN]: None of you care,
but I can't see.
368
00:14:23,993 --> 00:14:25,226
Am I following her?
369
00:14:25,852 --> 00:14:29,541
♪ ♪
370
00:14:31,654 --> 00:14:33,726
[BIRD CALLING]
371
00:14:35,067 --> 00:14:37,562
Hey! Can you slow down a little bit?
372
00:14:37,785 --> 00:14:40,114
My equilibrium is really off
because of this...
373
00:14:40,209 --> 00:14:41,440
Aggressive Jimmy eye.
374
00:14:41,489 --> 00:14:43,994
I don't know,
I don't really see a difference
375
00:14:44,043 --> 00:14:45,618
between that and your regular eye.
376
00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:46,691
Look a little bit closer.
377
00:14:46,740 --> 00:14:49,009
There has to be a
slight difference here!
378
00:14:49,200 --> 00:14:50,955
I can see this eye
379
00:14:51,004 --> 00:14:52,777
getting bigger with this eye.
380
00:14:52,825 --> 00:14:55,009
I have no peripheral vision.
381
00:14:55,081 --> 00:14:56,366
At all.
382
00:14:57,520 --> 00:15:01,052
How is it that everyone
in the family hates camping?
383
00:15:01,344 --> 00:15:03,062
I mean, here I thought it was gonna be
384
00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:05,069
Mom's last camping trip and,
385
00:15:05,253 --> 00:15:07,770
I don't know,
now I'm realizing it could also be mine.
386
00:15:07,819 --> 00:15:08,969
That's not necessarily true;
387
00:15:09,018 --> 00:15:11,420
your next husband could love camping.
388
00:15:12,670 --> 00:15:14,851
Doesn't it just seem like
everything's changing all at once?
389
00:15:14,900 --> 00:15:16,201
Uh, yeah, 50 minutes ago,
390
00:15:16,250 --> 00:15:17,941
I could see out of both eyes, Max.
391
00:15:18,938 --> 00:15:21,554
I have absolutely no depth perception.
392
00:15:22,085 --> 00:15:23,147
Oh! Were you trying to...?
393
00:15:23,196 --> 00:15:24,275
What were you trying to do?
394
00:15:24,323 --> 00:15:26,917
- Trying to shake your hand.
- Right.
395
00:15:26,966 --> 00:15:28,973
I just wanted this camping trip
396
00:15:29,022 --> 00:15:30,505
to feel like the old days.
397
00:15:30,584 --> 00:15:32,030
Seems like the older we get,
398
00:15:32,079 --> 00:15:33,714
the harder a bunch of stuff becomes.
399
00:15:35,098 --> 00:15:36,152
[SIGHING]
400
00:15:36,201 --> 00:15:39,289
I think this Go Girl,
needs a little hug.
401
00:15:39,338 --> 00:15:41,590
No. It's just your eye
just looks really sticky,
402
00:15:41,639 --> 00:15:43,114
and I don't want it near my hair.
403
00:15:43,163 --> 00:15:44,562
It's gonna crust over.
404
00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:46,624
- It will crust over.
- Great, but when it does,
405
00:15:46,673 --> 00:15:48,466
we'll do it then, when it crusts.
406
00:15:48,515 --> 00:15:49,807
I think I need some cream
407
00:15:49,856 --> 00:15:51,344
- or something.
- Yeah, probably.
408
00:15:57,369 --> 00:15:59,189
Hey! Welcome back!
409
00:15:59,726 --> 00:16:00,913
GREAT NEWS:
410
00:16:00,962 --> 00:16:02,639
the girls and I found a
decent amount of food
411
00:16:02,688 --> 00:16:05,457
by "foraging" through the minivan,
so...
412
00:16:06,361 --> 00:16:07,890
fish and chips are on the menu.
413
00:16:08,028 --> 00:16:10,769
- Fish stinks.
- I'm not eating that.
414
00:16:10,860 --> 00:16:13,002
Girls, please,
you're crushing Daddy's soul.
415
00:16:13,310 --> 00:16:16,513
This is great, guys. Thank you.
416
00:16:24,383 --> 00:16:27,805
- ♪ Amazing Grace ♪ - No.
417
00:16:27,925 --> 00:16:29,447
How rude!
418
00:16:29,496 --> 00:16:33,144
I'm sorry I had such high
expectations of this camping trip.
419
00:16:33,484 --> 00:16:35,331
I just wanted it to be perfect
420
00:16:35,380 --> 00:16:36,918
like it was when I was a kid.
421
00:16:36,967 --> 00:16:38,218
Perfect?
422
00:16:38,267 --> 00:16:40,084
It was never perfect, Max.
423
00:16:40,350 --> 00:16:42,666
Well, they always ended in disaster.
424
00:16:42,928 --> 00:16:44,888
- Really?
- Really.
425
00:16:44,952 --> 00:16:47,933
I don't remember a year
where Jann didn't get the trots.
426
00:16:48,091 --> 00:16:49,960
Have I not been through enough today?
427
00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:52,178
And three years in a row,
428
00:16:52,227 --> 00:16:53,801
someone needed stitches.
429
00:16:53,894 --> 00:16:56,248
That was me. That was always me.
430
00:16:56,415 --> 00:16:59,258
And in '88, two tents caught on fire.
431
00:16:59,307 --> 00:17:01,319
- [CYNTHIA LAUGHING]
- That was not me.
432
00:17:01,368 --> 00:17:03,051
That was that kid, Pyro Pete.
433
00:17:03,100 --> 00:17:04,328
Whatever happened to him?
434
00:17:04,377 --> 00:17:06,760
He was so hot!
435
00:17:08,058 --> 00:17:10,782
I guess I just remember the good stuff.
436
00:17:11,384 --> 00:17:13,358
I think you remember it fondly
437
00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:15,436
because we were all together.
438
00:17:21,347 --> 00:17:24,929
♪ Amazing Grace ♪
439
00:17:25,136 --> 00:17:27,865
- No!
- This is so disrespectful.
440
00:17:27,913 --> 00:17:29,969
- People pay for that.
- Jann, you're forcing it.
441
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,136
- You're forcing it!
- How does that even make sense?
442
00:17:32,184 --> 00:17:34,538
- Car's unlocked!
- [GIRLS SCREAMING]
443
00:17:35,387 --> 00:17:38,057
[GIRLS]: Let's make s'mores!
444
00:17:39,376 --> 00:17:42,971
This campsite has at least
27 violations.
445
00:17:43,104 --> 00:17:44,587
You're a lifesaver, Rhonda.
446
00:17:44,636 --> 00:17:46,475
Could be more,
I'm just getting started.
447
00:17:46,524 --> 00:17:47,904
[DAVE]: Eh, you're doing fine work.
448
00:17:47,953 --> 00:17:50,191
Jann, are you wearing makeup?
449
00:17:50,274 --> 00:17:52,354
♪ ♪
450
00:17:52,436 --> 00:17:54,061
[JANN]: ♪ I used to think ♪
451
00:17:54,110 --> 00:17:57,581
♪ That I was a good girl ♪
452
00:18:01,568 --> 00:18:03,388
♪ I used to think ♪
453
00:18:03,437 --> 00:18:07,298
♪ That the world was fair ♪
454
00:18:11,256 --> 00:18:14,830
♪ Things have gone just a little bit ♪
455
00:18:14,996 --> 00:18:18,097
♪ Crazy ♪
456
00:18:20,673 --> 00:18:23,120
[JANN]: ♪ Don't think I belong ♪
457
00:18:23,397 --> 00:18:26,067
♪ Anywhere ♪
458
00:18:30,187 --> 00:18:32,997
Guess we're gonna need
more therapy sessions, huh?
459
00:18:33,045 --> 00:18:34,545
You're still into it?
460
00:18:34,594 --> 00:18:36,787
I'm so happy to hear that.
461
00:18:37,120 --> 00:18:38,869
Of course I'm still into it.
462
00:18:39,092 --> 00:18:41,064
I'm not giving up on us.
463
00:18:41,130 --> 00:18:42,731
Me either.
464
00:18:42,941 --> 00:18:45,009
We have a lot of stuff to work through,
465
00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:47,332
but I love you.
466
00:18:47,806 --> 00:18:50,476
- I love you too.
- Oooh.
467
00:18:51,944 --> 00:18:53,373
Then we need each other.
468
00:18:53,422 --> 00:18:56,062
God, we do need each other,
especially right now
469
00:18:56,111 --> 00:18:58,145
'cause my back is so goddamn itchy.
470
00:18:58,273 --> 00:19:00,169
I just gotta get over.
471
00:19:00,248 --> 00:19:04,323
Oh yeah! That feels so damn great!
472
00:19:04,810 --> 00:19:10,367
♪ Amazing Grace ♪
473
00:19:10,415 --> 00:19:11,577
[EVERYONE ELSE]: No!
474
00:19:11,626 --> 00:19:13,513
[JANN]: I've had about enough
of that negativity.
475
00:19:13,601 --> 00:19:16,084
To be honest. Goodnight.
476
00:19:17,089 --> 00:19:19,721
- Do you want a little hug?
- Oh, that's OK.
477
00:19:19,770 --> 00:19:21,579
- Go Girl wants a bit of a hug?
- I don't want to
478
00:19:21,627 --> 00:19:23,714
hurt your eye. It seems
like it's pretty tender.
479
00:19:24,198 --> 00:19:27,184
Hmm, there is
some eye liquid on your shirt.
480
00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:30,359
Oh, good, thank you. Thanks so much.
481
00:19:30,408 --> 00:19:32,523
Never put anything bigger
than an elbow in your eye.
482
00:19:32,571 --> 00:19:34,706
- What did you put in there?
- Kneecap.
483
00:19:34,973 --> 00:19:36,527
- Do you know what this is?
- What?
484
00:19:36,575 --> 00:19:38,929
I got a contact lens
stuck in there in '78.
485
00:19:38,977 --> 00:19:41,599
I knew it the whole time.
I once went in with tweezers,
486
00:19:41,647 --> 00:19:43,467
but I just... I was actually pulling
487
00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:45,713
on my real retina.
488
00:19:45,903 --> 00:19:48,272
Oh, you shouldn't pull
on your retina, should you?
489
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:51,208
Don't play with your retina. I'm pretty
490
00:19:51,256 --> 00:19:53,077
- if I stand like this.
- Yeah, you're
491
00:19:53,125 --> 00:19:54,945
pretty from that right side now.
492
00:19:54,993 --> 00:19:58,463
This is Tinder,
and this is what you actually get.
493
00:19:58,730 --> 00:20:00,818
♪ I am cool and I'm wise ♪
494
00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:03,220
♪ And I'm larger than your life ♪
495
00:20:03,268 --> 00:20:05,356
♪ I am bigger than the sun
Watch me burning ♪
496
00:20:05,404 --> 00:20:07,539
♪ To the end of all time ♪
497
00:20:07,806 --> 00:20:09,894
♪ I'll be fine
Watch me breaking through ♪
498
00:20:09,942 --> 00:20:13,097
♪ The finish line, finish line ♪
499
00:20:13,145 --> 00:20:17,368
♪ I am an army ♪
500
00:20:18,173 --> 00:20:19,503
♪ I don't do what I'm told ♪
501
00:20:19,802 --> 00:20:23,802
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