Original subtitles

FN P90 personal defense weapon.

Ideal for close-quarter combat,

capable of penetrating body armor.

Yeah. All right, pal. You're on the Shopping Channel.

I know this bit.

Back a pace. I need a wider visual.

So I guess you know what this is.

Shit.

I know it's not loaded.

You sure?

Pretty sure.

Should we find out?

Man, on comms: Jesus, mate. Have you got a death wish?

Heh heh heh.

I never carry guns and ammo together.

It's like taking a fox and a chicken across a river.

- What? - It's a brain teaser.

You got a fox, a chicken, and a bag of grain.

You've got to transport the chicken...

Yeah, yeah. I don't really give a shit

about foxes and chickens.

What else you got?

Wait here.

Man: What's happened? Did he I.D. you?

Couldn't I.D. his own arse in a hall of mirrors,

but thanks for looking out for me... mate.

John, listen, about earlier, back at your house,

what you think you saw.

John: Shut it. He's coming back.

Ahem.

Mossberg 500 12-guage pump-action shotgun.

This is your all-American classic.

Man, on comms: Keep your cool, John.

If we crack this, we're one step closer to the top.

Dealer: 14-inch barrel...

firing range of up to 40 meters.

tactical red dot sight.

Oh, and cheese.

Did you say, "Cheese"?

Yeah. I said, "Cheese,"

for your camera, Detective Inspector Major.

Carver, cover's blown! It's a setup!

Shit! Major, move! John, move!

Unh!

I ain't leaving without answers!

- Who set me up? - Don't know.

Carver: Major, I'm coming! Get out of there!

Give me a name!

Abort it!

Woman: I'm sorry, DI Carver.

Your partner was an excellent officer.

You two were the best team on the force.

In a way, it's like you've both died.

Yes, boss.

We'll name something after him, something important

like a helicopter or a canteen,

a birdbath, whatever.

Kelly.

John. Woman: I'm sorry, Mrs. Major.

Your husband was an excellent officer.

Carver: I think she just wants to be left on her own, boss.

Of course.

Can someone get rid of this corpse?

What are the stats?

84% suitability.

Do it.

All right, mate. From Judy in the office.

She was too upset to bring them, so she asked me to.

I mean, I paid for these,

so from Judy from me.

Sorry, John.

You know, I should have come sooner.

I just felt so guilty about... agh!

- Fucking hell! - Hello, Roy!

Aah! Aah! Aah!

What the fuck?

Oh, I thought you'd say, "Jesus,"

so I could go "Nope, but we both

came back from the dead!"

- Jesus! - The moment's gone now.

But I saw you die, John. I have you CPR.

I felt your blood running through me fingers

when I tried to get your heart going.

I'm the best cop in the unit, mate.

- They had to bring me back. - They? Who they?

The geeks. The techie bots.

Oh, my God!

No. Not him, you tool. He's flying a plane.

Her. They rebuilt me with computers.

Uh, she'll explain all the science bit.

So are you, like... like a robot?

I'm the same DI Major who's been saving your arse

for the last 10 years.

I've just been augmented.

- What's that mean? - What, the word augmented?

I don't know. They all keep using it.

I should probably check

- Does your wife know? - What augmented means?

No! That you're back from the dead, you dickhead.

I thought you could help me tell her.

You two always got along.

Anyway, the boss wants to see us.

Ssst. Zzzt. Zzzt. Zzzt. Zzz. Zzz.

Fucking hell.

I'm only kidding. Ha ha ha!

So, uh, why do you feel guilty?

Huh? Major: Well, back there,

you said you felt guilty.

What for?

Oh, nothing.

You feel guilty about nothing?

It's a normal psychological reaction, isn't it,

when someone dies.

- Is it? - Yeah. Yeah.

Oh.

What's with the birdbath?

Appreciate the flowers, Judy, but I'm not dead.

I'm not Judy.

John Major, it's good to have you back.

Same to you, boss.

This place was nothing without you.

You're the best cop in the unit.

Compared to you, the rest of the people in here

are worse than shit.

Boss, I still don't get any of this.

I saw this man die.

I was chief pallbearer at his funeral.

We had to stage a funeral for cover.

It was Gracie in the coffin.

What, I buried the sniffer dog?

Full police honors.

It's what she would have wanted Roy.

Well, why didn't you tell me this was happening?

You know, you must have at least needed

permission from his wife.

The only permission we need is this guy's.

Do we have your permission, John?

- Hell, yeah! - Hell, yeah!

Look. It's the first time this procedure's been tried.

We had to keep it under wraps in case it went tit-shaped.

Carver: Procedure? What Procedure?

What... what did you do?

Dr. Parfit will explain.

She's an American.

Parfit: Subject sustained irreparable damage

to several organs.

These we transplanted with replacements cloned

from stem cells.

Now for the higher cortical areas,

we pioneered a technique

of fusing artificial intelligence modules

with the subject's preexisting neural networks.

- Hmm. - You put computers in his head?

- So he is a robot? - No.

Yes!

So is he, like, what, part robot?

Parfit: He's 90% human, 10% nonorganic matter.

Major: Let's just say I'm 150% human.

Let's not say that.

So does that mean he can't get hurt,

he can't die?

Damn right it does!

No. It does not mean that.

Oh, fuck!

Yeah. Thanks for clearing all that up.

Boss: Look. It's simple. He was dead,

she brought him back, now he's better.

It's not brain surgery.

Well, technically, it is brain surgery...

Major: Blah, blah, blah. Listen.

I've got unfinished business out there,

so let's find the guy who shot me

and nail his head to his arse.

Easy, tiger. That investigation's

in the capable hands of DIs Gilbert and Ryle.

- Yeah! - Hey, hey!

And we need to check you're in full working order

before we let you loose on the streets.

A trial period.

Besides, you've got other things to deal with.

- Hmm? - Your wife.

Kelly knows I'm alive. They sent an officer.

So she knows she attended the funeral

of an English Springer Spaniel?

- Yeah. - Then you're right then.

Nowt to worry about.

Probably baked you a cake.

You look more nervous than me. What's up?

You all right?

Here.

Mate, it's really good to have you back.

You know, losing you was... was hard.

Well, I'm back now, so everything's fine.

Yeah, but it must... It must be weird for you,

you know, dying and then coming back part AI.

- How does it feel? - It's like...

you know when you go to sleep

and then you wake up

and you're awake again?

- Yeah. - It's kind of like that.

Ahh. So listen. What happened to the case

we were working on, Operation Blue Finch?

Closed down after you got shot.

But it's the reason I got shot.

Find my killer, and we crack Blue Finch.

Just before it happened, Kristof, that dealer,

he said something to you.

The wire went down, and I couldn't catch it.

Do you remember what he said?

I remember a name.

I don't know exactly where it came from,

but it's very clear in my mind.

OK. That's good. Go on.

Blumenthal, Heston Blumenthal.

- That's a TV chef. - Is it?

Oh. Maybe it's not him then.

Do you remember anything else from that night?

The last thing I remember was earlier on.

You came out to our place. We had Chinese.

Not relevant.

I had a blazing row with Kelly,

stormed off to the pub.

Always...

No. That's not important.

I didn't come home for hours, and when I did,

you car was still in the driveway,

and I remember thinking, "I mean, that's weird.

What's he still doing here?"

John, John, John, you're focusing on the wrong thing.

Focus on the shooting.

- Rick Stein. - Also a TV chef.

- Gino D'Acampo? - Chef.

Ken Hom!

Look. Maybe we should leave this for now, eh?

Yeah.

Major: I mean, that's weird. What's he still doing here?

Hi, honey.

I'm home.

You look fantastic considering.

- Considering what? - The grief.

The grief? The grief.

Well, it's, um... it's, um, been a difficult year, so...

Wait. Hello, you.

- Oh, I'm back now. - I should go.

Kelly: No, God. Roy.

Carver: You've got a lot to talk about.

No. Please... please stay.

I'll get some more wine.

Major: Yeah.

Ah. Go and give her a hand, yeah?

What the fuck are we gonna do?

Well, I don't know, Roy. I don't know.

Does he know about us? Does he remember that night,

the night?

No. I think we'd know if he remembered.

Is he the same as before?

- Yeah. He's a bit of a knob. - And?

Did you manage to hide all me stuff?

Oh, God, yes. It's all bagged up.

It's in the shed.

- Oh, my God! - Oh.

Something's been going on here.

You've extended the kitchen.

Yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes.

There was a payout after you got shot,

so I... there was... I did that,

and I... I... I also, um, converted the loft, as well.

Major: Oh. You have been keeping busy.

Where's the wine then?

Refrigerator: You're running low on butter and hummus.

Ooh! Pinot grigio. Got the same wine always buys.

You see, augmented. Nothing gets past me.

Refrigerator: Thank you, Roy. Enjoy your wine.

Major: You take this through.

I'll grab me bag from the car.

Your bag?

Yeah. It's just a few bits.

We'll have to do a proper clothes shop

on the weekend.

Lost a little bit of weight getting shot.

No. No, no, John. You didn't think

you're just gonna move straight back in, did you?

- Well, this is my house. - I know it is, sweetheart.

I think... I think I... we just need

a little bit more time.

Time? I've been dead a year.

How much more time to you need?

I know. Exactly, you've been dead a year,

and, you know, it ripped my life apart,

and then today, they tell me that you're alive

but you're part computer.

It's a lot to take in.

I understand.

- How about tomorrow? - No.

- Day after? - No, John.

- Oh. - We just need to get to know

each other again.

We don't. I'm still me,

the same man that you married,

just with new wiring, improvements really.

Think of me as like... Oscar Pistorius.

That's probably not the reference

I would have gone for personally.

No?

- What went wrong? - Kelly doesn't want me back!

She didn't say that, John.

What do you mean what went wrong?

You're the Silicon Valley genius.

He's meant to be perfect.

But he's a work in progress, a prototype.

I need you to monitor him for abnormal behavior,

subtle things that only you would notice.

You sure you didn't have any bits left over

when you finished rewiring him?

Balls to this, Carver!

I've got no home, no wife.

Let's go and find the bastard who shot me!

Is he gonna be OK?

He better be.

We don't want this project shut down.

What do you mean shut down?

Just don't overstress him

and watch out for any unusual responses.

And try not to get him wet.

Got him.

Look. This fella's a small-time drug dealer.

He doesn't know nothing about the shooting.

He was at the deal, all right?

He's connected somehow, whether he knows it or not.

But he was questioned a year ago.

Yeah. By Gilbert and Ryle, not by me.

All right, but look. This is unofficial,

so tread softly.

Roger that.

Open up, Cleasby! It's judgment day! Oi!

Get out of my flat! Major: Oh, sorry.

Man: I'll call the police!

- Wrong door. - Yeah. It's that one.

Cleasby!

Jesus!

No... but we both came back from the dead!

Ohh!

But you're dead!

You got shot, and you died.

Don't believe everything you see on the news, Cleasby.

It wasn't on the news.

Oh. Wasn't it?

Well, in the papers then.

We got some questions for you, Cleasby.

Or online, and let's face it.

That's where most people are getting their news these days.

I answered you questions already.

I shouldn't have been there.

I'm drugs, not guns.

Carver: Look. It's all connected,

and you know it is.

Tell us who's supplying the product these days.

Amazon Prime.

Answer the question, Cleasby, or live to regret it.

- Is that a threat? - Oh, no, my friend.

That's not a threat. That's a promise.

Except a promise to do harm is a threat.

That's the word threat means, so technically, it's...

Yeah, I suppose. It's... well, then yes, it's a threat!

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Look. We know you're just a low-level, little scut.

We want someone important.

Take us to your supplier.

Sorry. I'm fully stocked. I don't need to...

Ohh! What the fuck?

Major, what are you doing?

I'm simply disposing of the drugs.

Well, why didn't you put them down a sink then

for Christ's sake?

Good one. Yeah. I was gonna do that anyway.

What?

Looks like you're out of stock, Cleasby.

Time for a trip to the wholesaler.

Are you all right?

Yeah. You're forgetting that narcotics

don't affect me anymore.

- Are you sure? - I'm pretty sure, yeah.

Unh.

- Pretty sure? - 99.9%, which is 999,

which is the number of the police,

which is the upside down of 666,

which is the number of the Beast,

which is the bad guys!

OK.

I don't like this. This is bad.

Carver, on comms: OK, Cleasby. When the supplier's here,

just act natural.

Stop touching your ear.

This is a nice parcark.

Ha ha ha! I said parcark.

I meant to say parcark.

So why did I say parcark?

Because you're very high on drugs.

I am not high on drugs! Ehn.

Carver: OK. Then something's been lost

in all this AI, digital bullshit,

and you've come back a really crap copper.

OK. It's the drugs, but I got us the result.

Cleasby's meeting his supplier, and we... we're gonna nail him!

Cleasby, on comms: OK. He's here. Can you hear me?

He's coming.

Ehhn.

Carver: We are nailing no one.

You... ugh... fuck... are staying...

- Hoo! - Staying in the car.

I hope you just said in the car.

Don't touch anything.

I fucking mean it.

Roy.

Oh, shit.

Cannabis. Supplier: Yeah.

Carver: Hey, softlad?

Major: Yeah!

Get him! Go, Roy!

Listen. I don't want to arrest you.

I'm working me way up the food chain here, OK?

Major: Why's he letting him go?

My God. Carver, it's you.

You've been in on this from the start.

That's why you felt guilty!

You set me up! It all makes sense!

Aah!

Security mode activated.

Someone shot my partner,

and you're gonna help me find him.

Major: Roy, I know it was you!

Is this guy with you?

Ugh!

Don't worry about him. He's just confused.

Come on, mate. Talk to me. What do you know?

Bastard!

Oh, don't worry. I won't let him lay

a finger on you.

Ugh. What'd you do that for?

I know it was you that got me shot!

You set it up, the whole thing.

That's why you left me in the car just now.

That's why you let the suspect go!

I left you in the car because you're off your head,

and I didn't let the suspects go.

You did!

Now can you let me go, please?

You bellend!

Agh!

Oh, fucking hell! Aah!

You all right, Roy?

From Judy in the office.

She was too upset to come.

How you doing? OK?

No. I died, but luckily enough,

they brought me back to life and replaced me brain

with a ZX Spectrum.

Was that a dig at me?

All right. Fair enough.

I feel bad about what's happened.

It looks worse than what it is.

There's no internal dam...

Yeah. I'm gonna stop you there, Roy.

That's not the thing I feel bad about.

The thing I feel bad about is the thing

I haven't told you yet.

Clearly, we acted without authorization

and caused a public disturbance.

- We did that? - Dennett wanted answers,

and, um... I blamed you.

- What? - Yeah.

I said you took a load of drugs,

let the suspect go, and jumped off the carpark.

Why would you do that?

Well, you heard what Dennett said.

This is a trial period. I'm on probation, Roy.

I can't tell her I screwed up.

So you told her I screwed up!

No. Well, yes, but I explained it.

You should have heard me. I really defended you.

- Oh. Thanks for that. - You're welcome.

Yeah, but just so you know, when I file

my own report, I'll be giving

a truthful account of exactly what happened.

- You can't. - Watch me.

Carver, I'm serious.

They'll switch me off.

You know, if they think I failed, I'll be...

- Terminated? - Don't take the piss.

I'm desperate.

This is your chance to make it up to me.

- Make what up? - At the birdbath,

you said you felt guilty.

Do you remember when I got shot?

You tried to save my life.

You did CPR and felt my blood on your fingers.

Well, here's your second chance,

and this time, you can save my life.

So you'll say it was you?

Just this once, but never again.

- Thank you. - Ahh.

Ooh. Ahem.

Well, um, I'll love you and leave you.

Just leave is fine.

Yeah. Couple more quick things.

I broke your car trying to hotwire it,

and I was also sick on the seat,

and you should probably get it out that carpark

because it's, like, 30 quid a day in there.

Oh, and, Carver...

it's good to be back.

Jesus.

He's leaving the hospital now.

I played dumb just like you said.

No. He never even mentioned your name, boss.

I don't think he remembers.

No. If anything, he's come back a bit shit.

I'll keep tabs, let you know

if we need to finish him... again.

You said you wanted to get back on Serious Crimes.

Not by committing one!

Have you tried switching yourself off and on again?

He's like a computer.

Oh, shit!

I thought you had your own place.

Major: I do have my own place, Kelly.

You just won't let me live in it.

Holy shit! A foot!