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1
00:00:01,175 --> 00:00:02,698
ADULT ADAM: Back in the '80s,
2
00:00:02,872 --> 00:00:06,093
the first day of school wasn't exactly magical for me.
3
00:00:06,267 --> 00:00:08,617
Yep, getting bullied, hazed,
and generally tortured
for being a geek
4
00:00:08,791 --> 00:00:10,140
had become a tradition.
5
00:00:10,314 --> 00:00:12,055
But this year felt different.
6
00:00:12,229 --> 00:00:14,753
Adam? More like, A-Damn!
7
00:00:14,927 --> 00:00:16,755
I changed up my look
over the summer,
8
00:00:16,929 --> 00:00:18,105
and it did not go unnoticed.
9
00:00:18,279 --> 00:00:21,891
Yo, Big Adam! AFG!
10
00:00:22,065 --> 00:00:23,719
Wow, so many new nicknames
and none of them insulting
11
00:00:23,893 --> 00:00:25,329
or about
my gentleman's cankles.
12
00:00:25,503 --> 00:00:26,635
Party at my place
in an hour.
13
00:00:26,809 --> 00:00:28,419
Uh, pretty sure we still
have school in an hour,
14
00:00:28,593 --> 00:00:29,681
but I love the invite.
15
00:00:29,855 --> 00:00:32,162
There's the prettiest girl
in school.
16
00:00:32,336 --> 00:00:34,599
Aww! Well, I think
you're the prettiest boy
in school.
17
00:00:34,773 --> 00:00:36,645
My mom does say
I have a long torso
like Cheryl Tiegs.
18
00:00:36,819 --> 00:00:38,560
I know she does.
[SIGHS]
19
00:00:38,734 --> 00:00:39,778
See you at lunch.[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
20
00:00:39,952 --> 00:00:42,825
What in the Oprah Show
Miracle Makeover is this?
21
00:00:42,999 --> 00:00:45,436
Mr. Glascott.
How was your summer?Terrible.
22
00:00:45,610 --> 00:00:47,743
As you know,
guidance counseling
isn't very lucrative,
23
00:00:47,917 --> 00:00:50,485
so I took a summer job mowing
the local golf course.
24
00:00:50,659 --> 00:00:51,834
I saw two alligators.
25
00:00:52,008 --> 00:00:55,098
I had a magical summer
with my foxy girlfriend.
26
00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:56,926
Thanks for asking.I didn't.
27
00:00:57,100 --> 00:00:58,319
Why do you look
so different?
28
00:00:58,493 --> 00:01:00,364
Did somebody finally punch
those glasses off your face?
29
00:01:00,538 --> 00:01:02,192
I got contact lenses.
30
00:01:02,366 --> 00:01:04,847
And is that a salon job?Nope. Just the sun.
31
00:01:05,021 --> 00:01:06,805
I thought you were allergic
to God's warm life-giver.
32
00:01:06,979 --> 00:01:08,894
Turns out
that was just avocados.
33
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:12,376
It's all so effortless
and stylish.
34
00:01:12,550 --> 00:01:15,510
As if you are no longer
afraid of the world
and everything in it.
35
00:01:15,684 --> 00:01:16,989
That's probably
the self-defense class
I took with my mom.
36
00:01:17,164 --> 00:01:18,600
It was quite a summer.
37
00:01:18,774 --> 00:01:20,384
Well, a gator took
one of my sport loafers,
38
00:01:20,558 --> 00:01:21,951
so we all got things.
39
00:01:22,125 --> 00:01:23,039
♪♪♪♪
40
00:01:23,213 --> 00:01:24,649
Hey.
41
00:01:24,823 --> 00:01:26,216
Sorry, sir.
We'll be on our way.
42
00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:28,000
Dave Kim, it's me.
Adam.
43
00:01:28,175 --> 00:01:29,741
Oh, I didn't recognize you
with your healthy posture.
44
00:01:29,915 --> 00:01:31,830
Yep. Turns out confidence
and self-worth
45
00:01:32,004 --> 00:01:33,876
are better than
any orthopedic shoe.
46
00:01:34,050 --> 00:01:36,618
Sounds like you and Brea
had a great summer,
but we missed you.
47
00:01:36,792 --> 00:01:38,359
Sorry about that,
but we're back
together now,
48
00:01:38,533 --> 00:01:40,187
and we're seniors!
We rule!
49
00:01:40,361 --> 00:01:42,058
Do we? My briefcase
already smells
like the garbage
50
00:01:42,232 --> 00:01:43,973
the cool kids
make me put in it.
51
00:01:44,147 --> 00:01:44,974
You really need
to get a backpack.
52
00:01:45,148 --> 00:01:47,019
Mad-man Ad-man!
53
00:01:47,194 --> 00:01:48,630
I see you found
a new crop of
freshmen to haze.
54
00:01:48,804 --> 00:01:50,240
I'll take this one.
55
00:01:50,414 --> 00:01:52,634
Stop! You know me.
Our moms work
at the same firm.
56
00:01:52,808 --> 00:01:54,853
What's happening?What's happening
is you're cool.
57
00:01:55,027 --> 00:01:56,377
Oh, come on, Dave Kim.
58
00:01:56,551 --> 00:01:58,509
It's Adam Goldberg,
a classic nerd.
59
00:01:58,683 --> 00:02:00,032
"Nanu-nanu."
60
00:02:00,207 --> 00:02:02,644
"Goonies never say die."
"Wax-on wax-off."
61
00:02:02,818 --> 00:02:05,255
You hang out with the jocks,
you're dating Brea Bee,
62
00:02:05,429 --> 00:02:07,475
and the sun dances
on your hair like
Christmas morning.
63
00:02:07,649 --> 00:02:09,085
Face it, you're cool.Please.
64
00:02:09,259 --> 00:02:11,218
There's no difference
between you and me.
65
00:02:11,392 --> 00:02:13,742
Trash day.This turtleneck
is a classic!
66
00:02:13,916 --> 00:02:15,918
They don't make it in
"tickle me pink" anymore!
67
00:02:17,789 --> 00:02:19,443
♪♪ I'm twisted up inside
68
00:02:19,617 --> 00:02:22,490
♪♪ But nonetheless
I feel the need to say
69
00:02:25,536 --> 00:02:27,277
♪♪ I don't know the future
70
00:02:27,451 --> 00:02:30,715
♪♪ But the past keeps getting
clearer every day ♪♪
71
00:02:30,889 --> 00:02:32,152
ADULT ADAM: It was fall
1980-something,
72
00:02:32,326 --> 00:02:33,849
and with school starting,
73
00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:35,459
my mom was getting
used to being alone.
74
00:02:35,633 --> 00:02:38,027
Looks like it's just you
and me, wet curds.
75
00:02:38,201 --> 00:02:39,420
Hey, I'm here, too.
76
00:02:39,594 --> 00:02:41,944
I just miss our little
munchkins so much.
77
00:02:42,118 --> 00:02:44,686
Oh, the summer's raced by,
we've barely seen them,
78
00:02:44,860 --> 00:02:46,383
and soon they'll be
back at school.
79
00:02:46,557 --> 00:02:47,297
We really did it.[DOOR CLOSES]
80
00:02:47,471 --> 00:02:48,777
Hey. We're back.
81
00:02:48,951 --> 00:02:50,779
And you'll never leave me,
and you'll age backwards
82
00:02:50,953 --> 00:02:51,910
till you're little babies,
83
00:02:52,084 --> 00:02:53,260
and we'll start
all over again?
84
00:02:53,434 --> 00:02:55,087
What a haunting thought
so early in the day.
85
00:02:55,262 --> 00:02:57,002
We went to the driving range
to hit golf balls.
86
00:02:57,177 --> 00:02:58,482
I nailed the guy
87
00:02:58,656 --> 00:02:59,396
in the ball-tractor
nine times.
88
00:02:59,570 --> 00:03:00,919
You were throwing them
at him, Bar.
89
00:03:01,093 --> 00:03:02,443
Ha! He has a bad job,
and I made it worse.
90
00:03:02,617 --> 00:03:04,140
But why aren't you
at your summer jobs?
91
00:03:04,314 --> 00:03:06,011
Mine ended.
92
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:08,057
The manager at Hickory Farms
questioned my work ethic.
93
00:03:08,231 --> 00:03:09,406
At least that's what I heard.
I wasn't there.
94
00:03:09,580 --> 00:03:11,539
And my summer job
said the pool
95
00:03:11,713 --> 00:03:13,280
would be safer
without me.
96
00:03:13,454 --> 00:03:15,325
There's a whole week
before you go back to college.
97
00:03:15,499 --> 00:03:18,067
[GASPS] That means
my babies are back.
98
00:03:18,241 --> 00:03:19,503
Whoa. We aren't
babies anymore.
99
00:03:19,677 --> 00:03:22,376
Damn right. I do
all kinds of adult stuff.
100
00:03:22,550 --> 00:03:24,508
Just the other day, I said,
"I agree to disagree."
101
00:03:24,682 --> 00:03:25,857
I was there.
He used it wrong.
102
00:03:26,031 --> 00:03:27,685
I agree to disagree.Oh! Nice!
103
00:03:27,859 --> 00:03:29,339
Well, until college
starts again,
104
00:03:29,513 --> 00:03:31,036
you're not gonna need
any of that stuff.
105
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:34,126
All you need is your mama.
106
00:03:34,301 --> 00:03:37,521
Starting with a three-meat
breakfast fit for a king!
107
00:03:37,695 --> 00:03:39,044
Hey, I'm the king!
108
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,829
Quiet, Murray.
109
00:03:41,003 --> 00:03:43,571
Our babies need their
essential fats and nitrates.
110
00:03:43,745 --> 00:03:47,139
Yes! Bacon and links
and pancake dippers?
111
00:03:47,314 --> 00:03:49,054
Is this a breakfast pizza
for one?
112
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,752
Yeah, this one.
113
00:03:50,926 --> 00:03:53,276
Dipper to Barry,
Dipper to Barry,
114
00:03:53,450 --> 00:03:55,757
we're ready to land
in the hangar.
115
00:03:55,931 --> 00:03:57,280
The hangar
is my mouth!
116
00:03:57,454 --> 00:03:58,455
[LAUGHS]
117
00:03:58,629 --> 00:04:00,457
Look at you two go.
118
00:04:00,631 --> 00:04:02,546
Just a minute ago, you were
independent young adults,
119
00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:03,808
and now your
mommy's flying food
120
00:04:03,982 --> 00:04:04,983
around your face,
and what is this?
121
00:04:05,157 --> 00:04:06,724
Just rubbing
my baby's tootsies.
122
00:04:06,898 --> 00:04:08,639
Mm! Get in there.
Little circles.
123
00:04:08,813 --> 00:04:10,859
I'm sorry, Mrs. G.,
but aren't you worried that,
124
00:04:11,033 --> 00:04:12,817
if you treat them like babies,
they'll regress into babies?
125
00:04:12,991 --> 00:04:14,776
That's the dream. [SIGHS]
126
00:04:14,950 --> 00:04:16,995
My schmoos are back
in my sweet bosom.
127
00:04:17,169 --> 00:04:17,996
It's gross,
but it was a long year.
128
00:04:18,170 --> 00:04:19,520
Let me have this.
129
00:04:19,694 --> 00:04:21,522
Don't screw this up
for us, Schwartz,
130
00:04:21,696 --> 00:04:22,697
just because
you don't have a mom.
131
00:04:22,871 --> 00:04:24,133
I have a mom.
132
00:04:24,307 --> 00:04:25,569
Her name is Linda,
and you know her well.
133
00:04:25,743 --> 00:04:26,744
I-I'm just saying maybe
134
00:04:26,918 --> 00:04:27,745
you should pump
the brakes a little
135
00:04:27,919 --> 00:04:29,399
before this gets weird.
136
00:04:29,573 --> 00:04:31,575
[CHUCKLES] She's really
poppin' my toe knuckles.
137
00:04:31,749 --> 00:04:33,316
Now I get why
you married her, Dad.
138
00:04:33,490 --> 00:04:35,710
Yeah, I'm really
living the dream.
139
00:04:35,884 --> 00:04:37,625
ADULT ADAM: While Barry
and Erica were moving
backwards,
140
00:04:37,799 --> 00:04:39,583
I was looking forward
to seeing my old friends.
141
00:04:39,757 --> 00:04:40,889
What's up, nerds?
142
00:04:41,063 --> 00:04:43,065
I mean, fellow nerds.
143
00:04:43,239 --> 00:04:44,675
I mean, who wants
to play the sequel
144
00:04:44,849 --> 00:04:46,764
we've all been waiting for,
Super Mario 2?
145
00:04:46,938 --> 00:04:48,157
We beat that months ago.
146
00:04:48,331 --> 00:04:49,550
We're on Super Mario 3now.
147
00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:50,725
There's an S.M.3?
148
00:04:50,899 --> 00:04:52,335
Not in America.
149
00:04:52,509 --> 00:04:53,554
But my brother's teaching
English in Japan,
150
00:04:53,728 --> 00:04:55,425
and he sent over a copy.
151
00:04:55,599 --> 00:04:57,253
We've been learning
Japanese all summer
to get ready for it.
152
00:04:57,427 --> 00:04:58,559
You need to know
Japanese to play?
153
00:04:58,733 --> 00:05:01,301
[SPEAKING JAPANESE]
154
00:05:01,475 --> 00:05:02,389
[LAUGHTER]
155
00:05:02,563 --> 00:05:04,042
Wow, I really missed a lot.
156
00:05:04,216 --> 00:05:05,174
You really did, dude.
157
00:05:05,348 --> 00:05:06,610
Well, I'm here now,
158
00:05:06,784 --> 00:05:08,395
and I'm excited to fully hang
with my nerd herd.
159
00:05:08,569 --> 00:05:09,613
I don't know why
I keep insulting you.
160
00:05:09,787 --> 00:05:11,311
Whoa, this school
has computers?
161
00:05:11,485 --> 00:05:12,964
Ready for lunch?
162
00:05:13,138 --> 00:05:14,270
We're tailgating
in the student parking lot.
163
00:05:14,444 --> 00:05:15,184
Oh, is there
a football game
this week?
164
00:05:15,358 --> 00:05:17,099
Nah.
165
00:05:17,273 --> 00:05:19,841
Hey, guys, any interest
in supporting athletics kinda?
166
00:05:20,015 --> 00:05:22,844
You seriously think we'd pick
a non-sanctioned barbecue
167
00:05:23,018 --> 00:05:25,281
over soaring through
the 8-bit skies with Mario?
168
00:05:25,455 --> 00:05:27,544
He can fly in this one?
169
00:05:27,718 --> 00:05:30,634
Any interest in playing
a video game starring
an Italian plumber?
170
00:05:30,808 --> 00:05:32,332
Does it have extreme violence
and/or extreme nudity?
171
00:05:32,506 --> 00:05:33,420
You can throw a turtle.
172
00:05:33,594 --> 00:05:34,682
No, thank you.
173
00:05:34,856 --> 00:05:36,379
Turtles are
God's creatures.
174
00:05:36,553 --> 00:05:38,163
It's okay. I'll just
catch you later, Ad.
175
00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:39,513
♪♪♪♪
176
00:05:39,687 --> 00:05:41,079
My life is ruined!
177
00:05:41,253 --> 00:05:43,212
Whatever it is,
look on the bright side.
178
00:05:43,386 --> 00:05:44,822
You can still
digest cheese.
179
00:05:44,996 --> 00:05:47,172
Will you take this
seriously?
180
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:50,262
I came back from summer
looking like a bronze
Ricky Schroder,
181
00:05:50,437 --> 00:05:52,177
and now the popular kids
want me bad.
182
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:53,570
While I don't
entirely follow,
183
00:05:53,744 --> 00:05:55,442
that does not sound
like a problem.
184
00:05:55,616 --> 00:05:56,878
Are you kidding?
185
00:05:57,052 --> 00:05:59,620
I belong on the hood of a car
in a Whitesnake video!
186
00:05:59,794 --> 00:06:01,448
You do have a nice way
about you.
187
00:06:01,622 --> 00:06:03,580
And now all my old friends
have moved on without me.
188
00:06:03,754 --> 00:06:04,712
Welcome to my world.
189
00:06:04,886 --> 00:06:06,409
Why are you wrapped up
like that?
190
00:06:06,583 --> 00:06:08,716
Mom swaddled me for warmth.
191
00:06:08,890 --> 00:06:11,196
But now is the time
for cold, harsh truths.
192
00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:13,285
Your old friendships
are dead.
193
00:06:13,460 --> 00:06:16,724
They can't relate
to what you and I are...
Kings among men.
194
00:06:16,898 --> 00:06:17,768
But I like
my old friendships.
195
00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:19,422
Better than
the awesome new ones?
196
00:06:19,596 --> 00:06:20,815
I don't know.
It's just different.
197
00:06:20,989 --> 00:06:22,469
I hear you.
198
00:06:22,643 --> 00:06:24,035
When I got back
from the war,
199
00:06:24,209 --> 00:06:26,995
my banjo buddies could not
relate to my army buddies.
200
00:06:27,169 --> 00:06:30,433
Eventually, we had
to find a mutual joy.
201
00:06:30,607 --> 00:06:32,696
Turns out it was
banana cream pies.
202
00:06:32,870 --> 00:06:34,219
That's it!
203
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:35,482
If I want everyone
to be friends,
204
00:06:35,656 --> 00:06:37,092
I just have to find
common ground!
205
00:06:37,266 --> 00:06:39,399
I just told you,
banana cream pies.
206
00:06:39,573 --> 00:06:41,313
I-I'll give it five
more minutes, but thanks!
207
00:06:41,488 --> 00:06:43,620
Aw, damn it!
I need to be re-swaddled.
208
00:06:43,794 --> 00:06:46,231
My arms got out! Mom!
209
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:48,277
ADULT ADAM: Thanks to Pops,
I had the perfect way
to bring my pals together.
210
00:06:48,451 --> 00:06:51,411
Meanwhile, my mom's friends
were bonding over literature.
211
00:06:51,585 --> 00:06:53,717
I'm so glad we started
this book club.
212
00:06:53,891 --> 00:06:56,067
We're such intellectuals.
213
00:06:56,241 --> 00:06:58,722
Can we call it a book club
when we're just reading
a magazine?
214
00:06:58,896 --> 00:07:00,681
It's my week, Ginzy,
so open your People.
215
00:07:00,855 --> 00:07:02,900
Well, I love the part
where Harry Hamlin
216
00:07:03,074 --> 00:07:03,858
is sexiest man alive.
217
00:07:04,032 --> 00:07:05,599
What a twist!
218
00:07:05,773 --> 00:07:08,819
Mommy! I dropped a Popsicle on
the dog, and I need a new one.
219
00:07:08,993 --> 00:07:10,908
A red one this time.
220
00:07:11,082 --> 00:07:13,258
Also, you need to wash
Lucky and the carpet
and a bunch of other stuff.
221
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:14,738
ERICA: Not before
you deal with this.
222
00:07:14,912 --> 00:07:16,479
I slept on the clothes
you folded,
223
00:07:16,653 --> 00:07:17,262
so they need
to be ironed.
224
00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:18,960
I was here first!
225
00:07:19,134 --> 00:07:21,049
And I changed my mind,
I want purple.
226
00:07:21,223 --> 00:07:24,705
Okay. One purple Popsicle
and a pile of pleated pants,
pronto.
227
00:07:24,879 --> 00:07:26,271
There you go,
have fun with it.
228
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:27,925
Um, what's happening here?
229
00:07:28,099 --> 00:07:29,710
Oh, uh, Barry, Erica,
and Mrs. G are trapped
230
00:07:29,884 --> 00:07:31,189
in this cycle
of codependence
231
00:07:31,363 --> 00:07:32,843
that's growing worse
by the hour.
232
00:07:33,017 --> 00:07:34,802
I call it
the "Great Regression,"
but I'm open to pitches.
233
00:07:34,976 --> 00:07:37,195
Here's a pitch.
Shut your dumb hole.
234
00:07:37,369 --> 00:07:38,806
Bevy! That's my son!
235
00:07:38,980 --> 00:07:41,678
Okay, but I only get my babies
for one week this summer.
236
00:07:41,852 --> 00:07:43,027
I'm making
the most of it.
237
00:07:43,201 --> 00:07:44,551
Beverly, they're adults,
238
00:07:44,725 --> 00:07:46,466
and you deserve to have
an adult relationship.
239
00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:48,555
I've developed one
with my boys,
240
00:07:48,729 --> 00:07:50,034
and it's one of the things
I'm most proud of.
241
00:07:50,208 --> 00:07:51,514
Well, I know
it's not your hedges.
242
00:07:51,688 --> 00:07:52,776
You never returned
my clippers!
243
00:07:52,950 --> 00:07:55,300
Okay, this magazine club
is over.
244
00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:57,346
Uh, I've got babies
to tend to. Come on.
245
00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:58,478
ADULT ADAM: And tend
to them she did.
246
00:07:58,652 --> 00:07:59,348
Mommy!
247
00:08:00,392 --> 00:08:01,568
My carrots are too big.
248
00:08:01,742 --> 00:08:03,744
Over the next week,
Barry got more helpless.
249
00:08:03,918 --> 00:08:05,789
Now they're too small.
250
00:08:05,963 --> 00:08:07,922
Throw 'em out
and start over with Kit Kats.
251
00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:10,228
Erica got lazier...
252
00:08:10,402 --> 00:08:11,882
I'm gonna take this
in your bed
253
00:08:12,056 --> 00:08:13,667
'cause I spilled
the last bowl in mine.
254
00:08:13,841 --> 00:08:16,626
...until finally
it all became too much.[SIGHS]
255
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,541
You want me to come running
when you ring a bell?
256
00:08:18,715 --> 00:08:19,977
This bell.
257
00:08:20,151 --> 00:08:22,414
I just figured
I'm tired of shouting
258
00:08:22,589 --> 00:08:24,286
and you're tired
of not responding to me
quickly enough.
259
00:08:24,460 --> 00:08:25,548
Wait. I want a Mom bell.
260
00:08:25,722 --> 00:08:27,985
Oh, get your own!
This is my Mom bell.
261
00:08:28,159 --> 00:08:29,291
Not for long.
262
00:08:29,465 --> 00:08:30,858
Mommy! Help![BELL RINGING]
263
00:08:31,032 --> 00:08:32,207
Are you not hearing
this horrible loud ringing?
264
00:08:32,381 --> 00:08:34,296
It's really unpleasant!
265
00:08:34,470 --> 00:08:36,211
ADULT ADAM: While my mom
realized her kids
were out of control,
266
00:08:36,385 --> 00:08:39,040
I was trying to take control
of my social life.
267
00:08:39,214 --> 00:08:40,911
Thanks for coming.
How are the refreshments?
268
00:08:41,085 --> 00:08:42,347
He took my Capri Sun.
269
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:43,871
Only to wash down
your cookie.
270
00:08:44,045 --> 00:08:45,046
Why are we here?
271
00:08:45,220 --> 00:08:46,874
I was about to ask
the same thing.
272
00:08:47,048 --> 00:08:49,354
There are like
ten other rooms
in this house, Dad.
273
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,400
You can go anytime.You called my bluff.
274
00:08:51,574 --> 00:08:54,490
We're here to find
common ground
between all my friends.
275
00:08:54,664 --> 00:08:56,666
JC, you're
the epitome of cool.
276
00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,276
It's obvious, but I do like
to hear it out loud.
277
00:08:58,450 --> 00:09:00,540
A-And, Dave Kim,
you're the epitome of...
278
00:09:00,714 --> 00:09:02,063
What? Say it.
279
00:09:02,237 --> 00:09:05,066
I'll say it.
Loser. Putz. Schmuck.
280
00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:09,113
Dork. Doof. Dink.
Schmo. Dingus. Goober.
281
00:09:09,287 --> 00:09:11,115
We get it, Don Rickles.Dorf.
282
00:09:11,289 --> 00:09:13,727
Anyway, help me find
the overlap between
both of your interests.
283
00:09:14,989 --> 00:09:16,425
JC: Ew, bro! Uh-uh.
284
00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:17,992
His circle shouldn't
touch my circle.
285
00:09:18,166 --> 00:09:19,907
But maybe it can.
286
00:09:20,081 --> 00:09:21,386
JC, what's something
you think is fun?
287
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:22,953
Shoving a twerp
in a locker
288
00:09:23,127 --> 00:09:24,259
and then pouring Pepsi
in the slots.
289
00:09:24,433 --> 00:09:25,565
It was a Mr. Pibb.
290
00:09:25,739 --> 00:09:26,391
I know what I poured.
291
00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:29,046
Let's keep trying.
292
00:09:29,220 --> 00:09:30,918
ADULT ADAM: So we set out
to list everything cool kids
and geeks like.
293
00:09:31,092 --> 00:09:32,136
Falkor The Luck Dragon.
294
00:09:32,310 --> 00:09:33,660
Casually mooning
an old-folks bus?
295
00:09:33,834 --> 00:09:36,184
The peaceful din
of an empty room.
296
00:09:36,358 --> 00:09:38,186
Creating a woman
in a computer program
to give you compliments.
297
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:40,144
Throwing javelins at trees.
298
00:09:40,318 --> 00:09:42,407
Guests who know
when they've outstayed
their welcome.
299
00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:44,496
Video games. Comics.
Star Wars.
300
00:09:44,671 --> 00:09:46,847
Great white sharks.
Snow leopards.
Kodiak bears!
301
00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:48,326
What is this again?
302
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,198
We're naming apex predators.No, we're not.
303
00:09:50,372 --> 00:09:52,722
Eventually, we found
tons of stuff in common.
304
00:09:52,896 --> 00:09:55,899
We got pizza,
Arnold Schwarzenegger,
and bumper cars.
305
00:09:56,073 --> 00:09:57,988
But here's the test.
306
00:09:58,162 --> 00:10:02,471
JC, how would you feel about
eating pizza with Dave Kim
307
00:10:02,645 --> 00:10:05,692
while talking about Arnold
and bumper cars?
308
00:10:05,866 --> 00:10:07,607
It's not terrible.That's the spirit!
309
00:10:07,781 --> 00:10:08,825
And Dave Kim?
310
00:10:08,999 --> 00:10:10,174
I guess I'm open to it.
311
00:10:10,348 --> 00:10:12,133
We did it!
Best friend punch!
312
00:10:12,307 --> 00:10:13,177
DAVE KIM: Ow!This is for school?
313
00:10:17,007 --> 00:10:18,835
ADULT ADAM: It was lunchtime,
314
00:10:19,009 --> 00:10:21,577
and Operation
Make All My Friends
Be Friends was a go.
315
00:10:21,751 --> 00:10:24,667
Aha! Sweet!
New giant cool-kid table.
316
00:10:24,841 --> 00:10:27,627
Actually, JC,
this is a combined table
for all my friends.
317
00:10:27,801 --> 00:10:29,454
I believe you already
know Dave Kim.
318
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,456
Oh, yeah! The guy
with all the birds!
319
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:32,588
Not even a little.
320
00:10:32,762 --> 00:10:33,850
It's something
to talk about.
321
00:10:34,024 --> 00:10:36,679
And while
you're catching up...
Pizza?
322
00:10:36,853 --> 00:10:38,507
[LAUGHS]
323
00:10:40,465 --> 00:10:42,293
Adam, w-why are you
trying so hard
324
00:10:42,467 --> 00:10:43,730
to bring everyone
together?
325
00:10:43,904 --> 00:10:45,645
I love spending time
with you and your friends,
326
00:10:45,819 --> 00:10:47,168
but I miss
my old friends.
327
00:10:47,342 --> 00:10:48,996
There's got to be a way
I can have it all,
328
00:10:49,170 --> 00:10:50,214
like Melanie Griffith
in Working Girl.
329
00:10:50,388 --> 00:10:52,390
That's sweet.
And weird.
330
00:10:52,564 --> 00:10:54,436
Yeah, how's that pepperoni
treating you?
331
00:10:54,610 --> 00:10:56,743
I didn't get a slice.
I just got elbowed
in the head.
332
00:10:56,917 --> 00:10:58,570
Corbett, did you take
four slices?
333
00:10:58,745 --> 00:11:00,616
It's the only way
to make a double-decker
pizza sandwich.
334
00:11:00,790 --> 00:11:02,139
Can we just go now?
335
00:11:02,313 --> 00:11:04,098
Yes! Thanks for asking.
336
00:11:04,272 --> 00:11:05,534
No! We're bonding.
337
00:11:05,708 --> 00:11:07,405
And it's time
for phase two.
338
00:11:07,579 --> 00:11:09,059
How about
that Terminator?[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
339
00:11:09,233 --> 00:11:10,757
Pretty cool, right?Schwarzenegger rules.
340
00:11:10,931 --> 00:11:12,019
I have a Terminatorbedspread.
341
00:11:12,193 --> 00:11:13,760
Nice, Bird Guy.
342
00:11:13,934 --> 00:11:15,457
From now on, I'm gonna
call you "Bedspread."
343
00:11:15,631 --> 00:11:16,719
It's working!
344
00:11:16,893 --> 00:11:18,068
You know,
I like Arnold's muscles.
345
00:11:18,242 --> 00:11:19,766
They remind me
of my muscles.
346
00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:22,682
I like the theme
of the movie...
Explosions.
347
00:11:22,856 --> 00:11:24,596
You think the theme
of Terminatoris explosions?
348
00:11:24,771 --> 00:11:27,599
And sending your dad
back in time to bone your mom.
349
00:11:27,774 --> 00:11:28,949
The theme is that everybody
has the ability
350
00:11:29,123 --> 00:11:30,472
to defeat their own fate.
351
00:11:30,646 --> 00:11:33,214
Don't tell me how to interpret
narrative motifs.
352
00:11:33,388 --> 00:11:34,781
Adam, maybe it's time
to call this?
353
00:11:34,955 --> 00:11:37,218
Or maybe it's time
for more snacks.
354
00:11:37,392 --> 00:11:39,873
[AS ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER]
I'll be back with more pizza.
355
00:11:40,047 --> 00:11:42,005
Wait. Was that your Arnold
Schwarzenegger impression?[LAUGHTER]
356
00:11:42,179 --> 00:11:43,267
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
I can do better.
357
00:11:43,441 --> 00:11:45,008
I'd hope so.
'Cause that sucked.
358
00:11:45,182 --> 00:11:46,706
Now say Arnold's line
from Commando.
359
00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:49,970
[AS ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER]
Remember when I said
I'd kill you last? I lied.
360
00:11:50,144 --> 00:11:52,450
[LAUGHTER]Wha... That's
so terrible.
361
00:11:52,624 --> 00:11:54,801
You shame
the Austrian people.
362
00:11:54,975 --> 00:11:56,759
Well, you kind of
brought them together.
363
00:11:56,933 --> 00:11:59,893
[IN NORMAL VOICE] Not how
I pictured it happening,
but a win's a win.
364
00:12:00,067 --> 00:12:02,025
ADULT ADAM: While
my bad impression
had good results,
365
00:12:02,199 --> 00:12:04,549
my mom's bad habits
had only gotten worse.
366
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:06,464
Ginzy, I need to borrow
your Cuisinart.
367
00:12:06,638 --> 00:12:08,205
I-I can't in good conscience.
368
00:12:08,379 --> 00:12:09,424
I'll find it.
369
00:12:09,598 --> 00:12:11,034
♪♪♪♪
370
00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:13,123
What the...
371
00:12:13,297 --> 00:12:15,299
Your child knows
how to vacuum?
372
00:12:15,473 --> 00:12:18,085
Try and stop me.
The home is a reflection
of all of us.
373
00:12:18,259 --> 00:12:20,609
Barry and Erica just keep
throwing Nerds candies
374
00:12:20,783 --> 00:12:23,090
in my path
so I'm never quite done.
375
00:12:23,264 --> 00:12:25,483
Look, Mom, the pears ripened,
just like you promised!
376
00:12:25,657 --> 00:12:26,571
Well, what are you
waiting for?
377
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,704
Core those suckers
and make a cobbler!
378
00:12:28,878 --> 00:12:30,662
Oh, way ahead of ya.
Already preheating
the oven to "yum."
379
00:12:30,837 --> 00:12:32,012
Chad cooks?
380
00:12:32,186 --> 00:12:33,535
We cook together.
381
00:12:33,709 --> 00:12:36,059
I find it's a great time
for us to catch up
and reconnect.
382
00:12:36,233 --> 00:12:38,061
Speaking of, how's your
tennis elbow, Mom?
383
00:12:38,235 --> 00:12:39,628
Oh, much better.
Thanks for asking, hon.
384
00:12:39,802 --> 00:12:41,499
[CHUCKLES] I meant
to ask an hour ago.
385
00:12:41,673 --> 00:12:44,024
Life moves so fast.
[CHUCKLES]
386
00:12:44,198 --> 00:12:46,287
Damn it, I want this.
Tell me how.
387
00:12:46,461 --> 00:12:48,811
Wait. You're asking me
for parenting advice?
388
00:12:48,985 --> 00:12:50,944
I know it's insane,
389
00:12:51,118 --> 00:12:54,643
but I thought I wanted
my children to be
babies forever.
390
00:12:54,817 --> 00:12:56,863
But now I know
what I want
391
00:12:57,037 --> 00:12:59,604
is to have adult,
respectful relationships,
392
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:01,258
like the kind you have
with your kids.
393
00:13:01,432 --> 00:13:04,131
Well, right now,
you're indulging
their every whim,
394
00:13:04,305 --> 00:13:05,828
and they're taking
advantage of you.
395
00:13:06,002 --> 00:13:09,092
You need to set limits,
establish rules,
396
00:13:09,266 --> 00:13:11,138
and most of all,
give them some
responsibilities.
397
00:13:11,312 --> 00:13:14,402
But Barry
says responsibilities
hurt his hugging arms.
398
00:13:14,576 --> 00:13:17,231
The next time
he says that,
you say,
399
00:13:17,405 --> 00:13:20,103
"The seed you plant today
becomes a flower tomorrow."
400
00:13:20,277 --> 00:13:22,845
I don't care about
gardening, Ginzy.
401
00:13:23,019 --> 00:13:24,716
That's why I threw out
your gardening gloves.
402
00:13:24,891 --> 00:13:26,588
Then when they act out,
you say,
403
00:13:26,762 --> 00:13:28,546
"Let's reconnect
after you've calmed down."
404
00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:30,548
Look...[CHUCKLES]
405
00:13:30,722 --> 00:13:32,333
...here's a list
of helpful phrases.
406
00:13:32,507 --> 00:13:35,162
"I appreciate
your understanding"?
407
00:13:35,336 --> 00:13:39,862
"Let's approach this from
a place of mutual respect"?[MOUTHING]
408
00:13:40,036 --> 00:13:42,691
"This feels like
a learning opportunity."
409
00:13:42,865 --> 00:13:44,127
This crap works?
410
00:13:44,301 --> 00:13:45,259
See for yourself.
411
00:13:45,433 --> 00:13:46,695
Mm. Just 'cause.
412
00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:49,654
[SHUDDERS]
I'm borrowing this instead.
413
00:13:49,829 --> 00:13:52,309
ADULT ADAM: As my mom
planned to steer her kids
in a new direction,
414
00:13:52,483 --> 00:13:54,877
I knew one more thing
that would drive my friends
closer together.
415
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:57,401
Who's ready
for bumper cars?
416
00:13:57,575 --> 00:14:00,317
Not me.
My mom was recently in
a minor car accident.
417
00:14:00,491 --> 00:14:01,884
This brings it all back.
418
00:14:02,058 --> 00:14:04,408
Aw, I'll be right here,
Bedspread. [CHUCKLES]
419
00:14:04,582 --> 00:14:06,889
Look at them.
The best of friends.
420
00:14:07,063 --> 00:14:08,499
I really did it.
421
00:14:08,673 --> 00:14:10,719
Are you sure bumper cars
are a good idea?
422
00:14:10,893 --> 00:14:12,677
Seems like kind of
a violent activity
423
00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:14,505
for groups that
are notoriously unkind
to each other.
424
00:14:14,679 --> 00:14:17,378
Violently delightful.
Everyone loves bumper cars.
425
00:14:17,552 --> 00:14:19,859
ADULT ADAM: But this
wasn't bumper cars.
426
00:14:20,033 --> 00:14:21,425
It was a full-blown
demolition derby.
427
00:14:21,599 --> 00:14:23,384
Hey! Take it easy!
428
00:14:23,558 --> 00:14:25,995
She's showing weakness!
Bash her more!Hey!
429
00:14:26,169 --> 00:14:29,172
Turns out bringing cool kids
and geeks together
was bumpier than I expected.
430
00:14:29,346 --> 00:14:31,522
JC, you know me!
I'm Bedspread!
431
00:14:31,696 --> 00:14:32,741
Sorry, bro.
432
00:14:34,699 --> 00:14:36,223
This is just assault.
433
00:14:36,397 --> 00:14:38,355
Guys, stop!
We're all friends here!
434
00:14:38,529 --> 00:14:40,009
But we're clearly not.
435
00:14:40,183 --> 00:14:42,446
I felt my brain
bang against my skull!
436
00:14:42,620 --> 00:14:44,971
I thought it would be fun
for all the people in my life
to come together.
437
00:14:45,145 --> 00:14:46,189
[SCOFFS]
Maybe for you.
438
00:14:46,363 --> 00:14:47,190
What are you doing?
439
00:14:47,364 --> 00:14:49,192
Making it easier
for you.
440
00:14:49,366 --> 00:14:51,020
Just be with them
'cause you're definitely
not one of us.
441
00:14:53,762 --> 00:14:55,024
There, there.
442
00:14:55,198 --> 00:14:56,983
ADULT ADAM: While my plan
hit a roadblock,
443
00:14:57,157 --> 00:14:59,637
my mom was ready
for a new path
with Barry and Erica.
444
00:14:59,811 --> 00:15:01,117
[BELL RINGS]Mommy! Her foot
touched my foot!
445
00:15:01,291 --> 00:15:02,945
Is there a problem?
446
00:15:03,119 --> 00:15:05,600
There wasn't until Barry
interrupted my basement nap.
447
00:15:05,774 --> 00:15:08,298
Yeah, because I also prefer
to nap underground.
448
00:15:08,472 --> 00:15:09,778
It's called "groundhog style,"
and it's everything to me.
449
00:15:09,952 --> 00:15:11,301
So get your own couch!
450
00:15:11,475 --> 00:15:13,390
Oh, good idea.
Mom, get me another couch.
451
00:15:13,564 --> 00:15:15,915
ADULT ADAM: This was it.
452
00:15:16,089 --> 00:15:18,874
My mom could either keep
indulging her terrible kids
or take Ginzy's approach.
453
00:15:19,048 --> 00:15:21,007
I understand your request,
454
00:15:21,181 --> 00:15:23,705
but I'm confident you can
take care of it yourself.
455
00:15:23,879 --> 00:15:25,663
That's the opposite
of what I want.
456
00:15:25,837 --> 00:15:27,622
Just haul
the upstairs couch
down here.
457
00:15:27,796 --> 00:15:30,712
I bet it would be
even more satisfying
if you did it yourself.
458
00:15:30,886 --> 00:15:32,453
Why would I want
to move a couch?
459
00:15:32,627 --> 00:15:33,889
That sounds heavy
and boring.
460
00:15:34,063 --> 00:15:35,804
Geez, Mom, just shove it
down the stairs.
461
00:15:35,978 --> 00:15:37,284
Gravity does
most of the work.
462
00:15:37,458 --> 00:15:39,677
I can see this is
frustrating for you.
463
00:15:39,851 --> 00:15:41,810
Let's revisit
when you've calmed down.
464
00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:44,421
I'll be calm
when I have my couch.
465
00:15:44,595 --> 00:15:45,945
Why are you being
like this?
466
00:15:46,119 --> 00:15:49,165
Because I am trying to have
an adult relationship.
467
00:15:49,339 --> 00:15:50,862
Adult to adult,
468
00:15:51,037 --> 00:15:52,821
take the cushions off first,
it'll make it a lot lighter.
469
00:15:52,995 --> 00:15:55,737
I know I've indulged you,
but I want something
different now.
470
00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:57,478
I want to talk as equals.
471
00:15:57,652 --> 00:15:59,697
Maybe while one of you
vacuums the stairs
472
00:15:59,871 --> 00:16:01,830
and the other one
bakes a pear cobbler.
473
00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:03,701
Oh, now I want you
to make a cobbler.
474
00:16:03,875 --> 00:16:05,442
With ice cream.
And cookies.
475
00:16:05,616 --> 00:16:06,661
And drizzle on
some fudge.
476
00:16:06,835 --> 00:16:08,184
That's not even
a cobbler anymore.
477
00:16:08,358 --> 00:16:09,011
You'll figure it out.
478
00:16:10,708 --> 00:16:11,927
Get the [BLEEP]
out of my house.
479
00:16:12,101 --> 00:16:13,276
Whoa!Whoa!
480
00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,104
And go where?
481
00:16:15,278 --> 00:16:18,542
That sounds like a problem
you adults can figure out
yourselves.
482
00:16:19,848 --> 00:16:21,719
It doesn't matter
what's on top!
483
00:16:21,893 --> 00:16:22,764
It's still a cobbler!
484
00:16:22,938 --> 00:16:26,289
Ow!
485
00:16:26,463 --> 00:16:29,379
ADULT ADAM: After failing
to bring my friends together,
I ended up friendless.
486
00:16:29,553 --> 00:16:31,381
It was shaping up to be
the worst school year ever.
487
00:16:31,555 --> 00:16:33,557
Gah! You're so quiet.
488
00:16:33,731 --> 00:16:35,081
I learned to be quiet
on the golf course.
489
00:16:35,255 --> 00:16:37,387
Any noise screws up
people's backswings
490
00:16:37,561 --> 00:16:39,650
and alerts swamp monsters
to your location.
491
00:16:39,824 --> 00:16:41,000
I hope you were
compensated well.
492
00:16:41,174 --> 00:16:42,523
Nope. So, what's
your deal?
493
00:16:42,697 --> 00:16:44,742
I lost all
my old dorky friends
494
00:16:44,916 --> 00:16:46,657
'cause I'm wildly
cool now.
495
00:16:46,831 --> 00:16:50,270
Adam, you will always
and forever be a nerd.
496
00:16:50,444 --> 00:16:51,227
Can I say that?I'm not loving it.
497
00:16:51,401 --> 00:16:53,099
Still, come with me.
498
00:16:53,273 --> 00:16:54,491
♪♪♪♪
499
00:16:54,665 --> 00:16:56,145
Climb this rope.
500
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:58,495
How's a demonstration
of my physical dominance
gonna help?
501
00:16:58,669 --> 00:17:00,106
Humor me.
502
00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:02,412
Whatever.
See you at the top.
503
00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:05,067
ADULT ADAM: Sure,
I'd never reached
the top before,
504
00:17:05,241 --> 00:17:07,200
but this year was different.
505
00:17:07,374 --> 00:17:09,941
I'd come a long way
from being an unathletic,
scrawny geek.
506
00:17:10,116 --> 00:17:12,335
I could dominate this rope.
I was a legend.
507
00:17:12,509 --> 00:17:13,902
Am I there?
508
00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:14,468
You're right where
you should be.
509
00:17:16,470 --> 00:17:17,906
I don't get it.
510
00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:19,690
If I'm not ripped,
why did the mailman say,
511
00:17:19,864 --> 00:17:20,778
"Looking good,
little man"?
512
00:17:20,952 --> 00:17:22,824
Yeah, he's just a weirdo.
513
00:17:22,998 --> 00:17:26,828
Wait, so if I'm not as buff
and rad as I thought I was
514
00:17:27,002 --> 00:17:29,787
and I'm not a dork
anymore, what am I?
515
00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:31,354
You're a little bit
of everything.
516
00:17:31,528 --> 00:17:33,052
Now I'm super confused.
517
00:17:33,226 --> 00:17:35,097
In high school,
you feel like
518
00:17:35,271 --> 00:17:37,360
you can only be one thing
or belong to one group.
519
00:17:37,534 --> 00:17:39,188
But as you get older,
520
00:17:39,362 --> 00:17:42,148
you can be lots of things
to lots of people.
521
00:17:42,322 --> 00:17:44,628
And once you realize that,
the whole world opens up
for you.
522
00:17:46,804 --> 00:17:49,677
So I can have cool friends
and nerd friends?
523
00:17:49,851 --> 00:17:51,809
You can even have friends
that are guidance counselors.
524
00:17:51,983 --> 00:17:54,377
I'd like that.
Thanks, John.
525
00:17:54,551 --> 00:17:55,596
Nope. Go back.
526
00:17:55,770 --> 00:17:57,641
That does not make
my ears feel good.
527
00:17:57,815 --> 00:17:59,948
ADULT ADAM:
As Mr. Glascott reminded me
I could be anything,
528
00:18:00,122 --> 00:18:02,385
my mom was scared
she'd only ever be one thing.
529
00:18:02,559 --> 00:18:05,388
Any idea why
Erica's sitting out
on the front lawn
530
00:18:05,562 --> 00:18:06,694
and Barry's
up in a tree?
531
00:18:06,868 --> 00:18:07,869
I kicked them out.
532
00:18:08,043 --> 00:18:09,479
Eh, works for me.
533
00:18:09,653 --> 00:18:13,222
I was trying to end
the Great Regression,
534
00:18:13,396 --> 00:18:15,398
but Ginzy's phrases
didn't work,
535
00:18:15,572 --> 00:18:18,009
and then they refused
to make me a cobbler
536
00:18:18,184 --> 00:18:19,663
when I wouldn't move
a couch.
537
00:18:21,883 --> 00:18:24,668
I have no idea what
any of that means,
but I do know that
538
00:18:24,842 --> 00:18:26,670
when our children
stay home too long,
they turn into morons.
539
00:18:26,844 --> 00:18:28,368
And it's my fault.
540
00:18:28,542 --> 00:18:30,674
Our whole relationship
is based on me
541
00:18:30,848 --> 00:18:32,981
indulging them
their entire lives.
542
00:18:33,155 --> 00:18:35,592
'Cause I thought
that's what a good mama did.
543
00:18:35,766 --> 00:18:37,377
But now that
they're older, I just...
544
00:18:37,551 --> 00:18:38,900
I want something more.
545
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:41,250
Tell 'em that.
546
00:18:41,424 --> 00:18:43,034
I tried,
but it didn't work,
547
00:18:43,209 --> 00:18:44,688
and then I threw them out
on the street.
548
00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:47,038
Well, then keep trying.
549
00:18:47,213 --> 00:18:50,781
You deserve to have
the relationship
you want with your kids.
550
00:18:50,955 --> 00:18:53,610
You think?I know.
551
00:18:53,784 --> 00:18:57,092
Now, go outside and get Barry
before he falls on his head.
552
00:18:57,266 --> 00:19:00,095
[MARSHALL CRENSHAW'S
SOMEDAY, SOMEWAYPLAYS]
553
00:19:00,269 --> 00:19:03,272
ADULT ADAM: Sometimes,
we can indulge the people
we love so much
554
00:19:03,446 --> 00:19:04,578
it's hard to see
we're holding them back.
555
00:19:05,883 --> 00:19:07,711
Hey.
556
00:19:07,885 --> 00:19:09,278
♪♪ I can't bear
to hear you cry...
557
00:19:09,452 --> 00:19:10,627
Look, I'm sorry
I kicked you out.
558
00:19:10,801 --> 00:19:11,715
We're sorry, too.
559
00:19:12,803 --> 00:19:14,762
You do so much for us,
560
00:19:14,936 --> 00:19:16,633
and it was wrong to take
advantage of your love.
561
00:19:16,807 --> 00:19:18,853
You will always be
my babies.
562
00:19:19,027 --> 00:19:20,115
♪♪ Someday, someway...
563
00:19:20,289 --> 00:19:21,682
But I'd really like
to try something new.
564
00:19:21,856 --> 00:19:23,031
♪♪ Someday, someway...
565
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:25,294
Way ahead of you.[SIGHS]
566
00:19:25,468 --> 00:19:28,254
I cut down most
of the Kremps' pear tree
while we were homeless.
567
00:19:28,428 --> 00:19:30,517
You mind if we chat
while we make you
a cobbler?
568
00:19:30,691 --> 00:19:32,301
Yeah, like,
what's your story?
569
00:19:32,475 --> 00:19:37,045
My story is that I am
the luckiest mom
in the world.
570
00:19:37,219 --> 00:19:39,090
♪♪ Is take the love
you've brought my way... ♪♪
571
00:19:39,265 --> 00:19:41,441
ADULT ADAM: Sure,
it can be scary
to change something
572
00:19:41,615 --> 00:19:43,573
that's been the same
for a long time.
573
00:19:43,747 --> 00:19:45,880
Oh, hey.
Come to invite us
to group dodgeball?
574
00:19:46,054 --> 00:19:47,708
Or a wedgie tournament?
575
00:19:47,882 --> 00:19:49,840
Or throw my glasses
in that long urinal
576
00:19:50,014 --> 00:19:51,755
where you sometimes touch
shoulders with strangers?
577
00:19:51,929 --> 00:19:53,975
I'm really sorry
for forcing you
to do things
578
00:19:54,149 --> 00:19:55,455
you weren't
comfortable with.
579
00:19:55,629 --> 00:19:58,022
But you all mean
the world to me,
580
00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:00,764
and I guess what
I'm trying to say is...
581
00:20:02,636 --> 00:20:04,246
[SPEAKING JAPANESE]
582
00:20:14,561 --> 00:20:16,258
[IN ENGLISH] Oh, man,
I just learned the one thing.
583
00:20:16,432 --> 00:20:18,826
You'll catch up.[BOTH CHUCKLE]
584
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,524
ADULT ADAM: In the end,
when we change who we are,
585
00:20:21,698 --> 00:20:25,093
it doesn't mean
we lose who we were
or who we care about.
586
00:20:25,267 --> 00:20:26,877
And through
all those changes,
587
00:20:27,051 --> 00:20:29,967
the people who love us
will always be there.
588
00:20:30,141 --> 00:20:32,318
Truth is,
we never stop growing up.
589
00:20:32,492 --> 00:20:35,321
Everyone just does it
at their own speed.
590
00:20:35,495 --> 00:20:37,148
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS] Yeah, I'd come a long way
since I was a freshman.
591
00:20:37,323 --> 00:20:38,976
It was my senior year,
592
00:20:39,150 --> 00:20:41,196
and it was gonna be different
for all of us.
593
00:20:41,370 --> 00:20:43,372
But one thing was for sure...
594
00:20:43,546 --> 00:20:45,635
I couldn't wait
for the adventure to begin.
595
00:20:49,117 --> 00:20:50,161
Come on, Adam.
596
00:20:50,336 --> 00:20:51,337
[BELL DINGS]
597
00:20:51,511 --> 00:20:53,295
♪♪♪♪
598
00:20:55,732 --> 00:20:57,952
Hey, notice
anything different?
599
00:20:58,126 --> 00:20:59,562
You're wearing roller skates?
600
00:20:59,736 --> 00:21:01,085
Inspired by your
radical change,
601
00:21:01,260 --> 00:21:02,522
I decided
to change myself.
602
00:21:02,696 --> 00:21:04,785
Now I'm Mr. Glascott
603
00:21:04,959 --> 00:21:06,482
the roller-skating
guidance counselor.
604
00:21:06,656 --> 00:21:07,309
Check out my moves.
605
00:21:09,790 --> 00:21:10,486
That's okay, I guess.
606
00:21:10,660 --> 00:21:11,922
You guess?
607
00:21:12,096 --> 00:21:13,750
It took me three days
to learn that.
608
00:21:13,924 --> 00:21:15,404
I just don't see
how roller-skating
609
00:21:15,578 --> 00:21:16,753
is gonna help you relate
to students any better.
610
00:21:16,927 --> 00:21:18,277
Watch and learn.
Give me a little help here.
611
00:21:19,669 --> 00:21:22,150
[SCREAMS]
612
00:21:22,324 --> 00:21:25,153
Super-cool guidance counselor
coming through!
613
00:21:25,327 --> 00:21:27,373
That's why you start
with a necklace.
47550
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