Original subtitles

SO, YOU KNOW, PROM'S COMING UP.

AND I THINK ME AND YOU HAVE SOMETHING REALLY SPECIAL.

( sighs )

AND I'D REALLY BE HONORED

IF YOU'D BE MY DATE TO THE PROM.

OH, AUSTIN.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

THAT'S HOW YOU'RE GOING TO ASK PIPER TO THE PROM?

BOR-ING.

WHAT WAS WRONG WITH THAT?

IT'S ALL ABOUT THE BIG ASK.

YOU HAVE TO ASK HER IN A MEMORABLE WAY.

SOMETHING BIG. SOMETHING ROMANTIC.

YEAH, LIKE WHEN JACE ASKED ME.

WE WERE VIDEOCHATTING WHILE HE WAS JUMPING OUT OF AN AIRPLANE,

AND HE WOULDN'T OPEN HIS PARACHUTE

UNTIL I SAID YES.

SEE? ROMANTIC.

I'VE ALWAYS DREAMT ABOUT HOW I WAS GOING TO BE ASKED TO PROM.

FLOWERS, VIOLIN MUSIC,

MY DATE ON A WHITE HORSE DRESSED AS A KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR.

BOR-ING.

I CAN'T BELIEVE GAVIN HASN'T ASKED YOU YET.

YOU KNOW, PROM'S ONLY A COUPLE OF WEEKS AWAY.

HE WILL. I'M SURE HE'S JUST TRYING

TO FIGURE OUT SOMETHING EXTRA SPECIAL.

AUSTIN! WHERE'S THE EGG?

RELAX. IT'S RIGHT HERE.

AH!

NO, WAY! A ZALIEN EGG?!

YEP. I'M ABOUT TO ASK CARRIE TO GO TO PROM.

ON OUR FIRST DATE, WE SAW "ZALIEN 12: TEARS OF THE DEAD."

I'M GOING TO RECREATE THE FINAL SCENE

WHERE THE BABY ZALIEN KING POPS HIS HEAD OUT OF AN EGG.

BUT INSTEAD OF EATING CARRIE'S DELICIOUS BRAIN,

I'M GOING TO ASK HER TO BE MY DATE TO PROM.

( sighing )

HERE COMES CARRIE. GET IN THE EGG.

HAS ANYONE SEEN MY DEZZIE?

- CARRIE! - ( screams )

KARATE CHOP!

CARRIE! THAT'S DEZ.

"TEARS OF DEAD." FIRST DATE.

PROM. GO WITH?

I'D LOVE TO GO TO PROM WITH YOU.

YAY!

( theme music playing )

♪ WHEN THE CROWD WANTS MORE ♪

♪ I BRING ON THE THUNDER ♪

♪ 'CAUSE YOU'VE GOT MY BACK ♪

♪ AND I'M NOT GOING UNDER ♪

♪ YOU'RE MY POINT, YOU'RE MY GUARD ♪

♪ YOU'RE THE PERFECT CHORD ♪

♪ AND I SEE OUR NAMES TOGETHER ON EVERY BILLBOARD ♪

♪ WE'RE HEADED FOR THE TOP, WE'VE GOT IT ON LOCK ♪

♪ WE'LL MAKE 'EM SAY "HEY!" ♪

♪ AND WE'LL KEEP ROCKIN' ♪

♪ OH, THERE'S NO WAY I COULD MAKE IT WITHOUT YA ♪

♪ DO IT WITHOUT YA, BE HERE WITHOUT YA ♪

♪ IT'S NO FUN WHEN YOU'RE DOING IT SOLO ♪

♪ WITH YOU IT'S LIKE, "WHOA," YEAH, AND I KNOW ♪

♪ I OWN THIS DREAM ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I GOT YOU WITH ME ♪

♪ THERE'S NO WAY I COULD MAKE IT WITHOUT YA ♪

♪ DO IT WITHOUT YA, BE HERE WITHOUT YA. ♪

HEY, ALLY. DID--

NO, GAVIN DIDN'T ASK ME TO PROM YET.

YOU DON'T KNOW I WAS GOING TO ASK YOU THAT.

THEN WHAT WERE YOU GOING TO ASK ME?

GAVIN PROM THING.

SO, AUSTIN, DID YOU ASK--

NO, I DIDN'T ASK PIPER YET.

BUT I CAME UP WITH A GREAT WAY TO DO IT.

I'M NOT TELLING ANYONE 'CAUSE I DON'T WANT

HER TO FIND OUT... DEZ.

I CAN KEEP A SECRET.

I NEVER TOLD ANYBODY YOU SLEEP WITH A LAVENDER EYE PILLOW.

YOU JUST TOLD ALLY.

RELAX, IT'S NOT LIKE I TOLD HER

ABOUT YOUR LADYBUG NIGHT LIGHT.

GUESS WHO DOESN'T HAVE A DATE TO PROM.

- OH, NO. - WHAT HAPPENED?

DID YOU AND JACE BREAK UP?

NO, BUT HIS LEG BROKE UP.

HE WAS TRYING TO DO A SKATEBOARD TRICK

WHILE RIDING A MOTORCYCLE.

- AWESOME. - COOL.

NOW HE CAN'T GO TO PROM WITH ME.

- HORRIBLE. - THAT'S TERRIBLE.

LOOKS LIKE YOU AND ALLY

ARE GOING TO BE THE ONLY TWO PEOPLE NOT GOING TO PROM.

OH, I'M GOING. JUST NOT WITH JACE.

SO THEN ALLY'S THE ONLY ONE NOT GOING?

THEY'RE HAVING A COUPLES' DANCE CONTEST,

AND THE WINNERS GET $1,000.

ONCE I FIND A DATE WHO CAN DANCE,

THAT'S GOING TO BE ME.

OH HO HO, I DON'T THINK SO.

ME AND CARRIE ARE GOING TO WIN.

WAIT-- AUSTIN, ARE YOU ENTERING

THE PROM DANCE COMPETITION?

NO. IT WOULDN'T BE FAIR.

COOL. OH HO HO HO HO!

I DON'T THINK SO.

ME AND CARRIE ARE GOING TO WIN.

WE'VE BEEN WORKING ON SOME PRETTY FLASHY MOVES.

WHAT.

I CAN'T LOSE.

I WANT TO USE THE PRIZE MONEY TO FLY TO ALBUQUERQUE

AND SURPRISE JACE.

THAT'S SWEET, BUT WON'T HE BE UPSET

YOU'RE GOING TO PROM WITH SOMEBODY ELSE?

YEP, VERY UPSET.

THAT'S WHY I'M TELLING HIM I'M GOING ALONE.

HE'LL NEVER FIND OUT.

AS LONG AS NOBODY SAYS ANYTHING STUPID-- DEZ.

I CAN KEEP A SECRET.

I NEVER TOLD ALLY THAT YOU THREW AWAY

THE HAT SHE GAVE YOU FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY.

( gasps )

YOU JUST TOLD HER.

YOU SAID A SEAGULL SWOOPED DOWN AND TOOK THAT HAT.

WELL, I COULDN'T SAY A BEAR TOOK IT.

'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT I SAID ABOUT THE PURSE YOU GAVE ME FOR CHRISTMAS.

ARE YOU GOING TO EAT THAT?

YOU MEAN THIS SANDWICH

THAT I'M LITERALLY PUTTING IN MY MOUTH?

YES.

OH, 'CAUSE THERE'S A BUG ON IT.

( gags )

( sighs )

ALLY, ALLY! GAVIN'S HEADING THIS WAY.

HE'S ALL DRESSED UP AND HE'S CARRYING FLOWERS.

THIS IS IT. HE'S FINALLY ASKING YOU TO PROM.

( squealing )

JUST ACT NATURAL.

OR WHATEVER THAT IS.

I'M GOING TO FILM THIS.

YOU'LL WANT TO REMEMBER THIS MOMENT FOREVER.

( squealing )

ALLY.

OH, HI, GAVIN.

I HAVE SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT TO ASK YOU.

WHATEVER COULD IT BE?

I'M SINGING TO A SICK FAN AT THE HOSPITAL,

AND I WAS WONDERING IF THESE ARE GOOD FLOWERS TO BRING.

OH. THAT'S YOUR IMPORTANT QUESTION?

OH. ( laughs ) YEAH, SURE.

THOSE FLOWERS...

THAT YOU KNOW ARE MY FAVORITE...

SHOULD DO.

I KNEW YOU'D HAVE THE ANSWER.

YOU'RE THE BEST.

HEY, WE NEED TO PLAN A BIG NIGHT OUT SOON.

I'LL EMAIL THIS VIDEO TO YOU.

I CAN'T BELIEVE GAVIN.

I KNOW.

SINGING TO A SICK FAN IS SO THOUGHTFUL.

THAT'S NOT WHAT SHE MEANT.

I DON'T THINK HE'S EVER GOING TO ASK ME TO PROM.

I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL, ALLY.

AUSTIN STILL HASN'T ASKED ME YET.

( acoustic guitar playing )

Austin: ♪ PIPER ♪

♪ I WOULD HAVE DONE THIS SOONER ♪

♪ BUT I WAS GIVEN THE TASK ♪

♪ OF FIGURING OUT ♪

♪ HOW TO DO A BIG ASK ♪

♪ I WANTED TO ASK YOU ♪

♪ IN THE PLACE WE FIRST MET ♪

♪ TO MAKE THIS MOMENT ♪

♪ SOMETHING YOU WON'T FORGET ♪

♪ IF YOU SAY NO, I'LL HAVE TO GO WITH MY MOM ♪

♪ SO PLEASE SAY YES ♪

♪ AND BE MY DATE TO THE PROM. ♪

SO WHAT DO YOU SAY?

( giggles softly )

YES.

I'LL EMAIL YOU A COPY OF THIS VIDEO.

WE'RE GOING TO HAVE SO MUCH FUN AT PROM.

I KNOW.

IT'S GOING TO BE THE MOST ROMANTIC NIGHT EVER.

( sighs )

OH! ( gags )

( both laughing )

BAD NEWS, BABE.

I KNOW WE BOTH REALLY HAD OUR HEARTS SET

ON RIDING INTO PROM ON TOP OF A GIANT ELEPHANT,

BUT MY COUSIN WON'T LET US BORROW HIS GIANT ELEPHANT.

OH!

HEY, THE IMPORTANT THING

IS THAT WE'RE GOING TO PROM--

WHICH WILL OBVIOUSLY BE THE MOST ROMANTIC,

MAGICAL NIGHT OF OUR LIVES.

( both sigh )

GUESS WHO GOT A DATE FOR PROM.

SERIOUSLY?

WHO'S THE LUCKY GUY?

- YOU'LL NEVER GUESS. - NOT SO FAST, TRISH.

( salsa music playing )

I WANT TO TELL THEM THE GOOD NEWS.

TRISH AND I ARE GOING TO PROM TOGETHER.

- WHAT? - REALLY?

CHUCK?

AND SHE ASKED ME.

- WHAT? - REALLY?

CHUCK?

HE WAS THE BEST DANCER WHO DIDN'T HAVE A DATE.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE DATING SUN HEE.

YEAH, REMEMBER THE GIRL

YOU BROKE UP WITH MY SISTER TO GO OUT WITH?

OH, I REMEMBER.

SORRY ABOUT THAT, RED.

THERE'S ONLY SO MUCH CHUCK TO GO AROUND.

CHUCK AND SUN HEE HAVE ONE OF THOSE ON AGAIN,

OFF AGAIN RELATIONSHIPS.

RIGHT NOW, WE'RE OFF AGAIN.

AND LUCKY FOR TRISHY-POO,

I TURNED DOWN FIVE OTHER PROM DATES.

( murmurs )

FIVE OTHER GIRLS ASKED THAT GUY TO PROM?

HE'S A LADIES' MAN.

WE'RE GOING TO WIN THAT DANCE CONTEST, RED.

YOU'RE WRONG, CHUCK.

'CAUSE CARRIE AND I ARE GOING TO WIN THAT DANCE COMPETITION.

OH, HO HO, NO, YOU'RE NOT.

MY DANCE MOVES ARE SO FLY--

OKAY, I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.

YOU NEED TO SAVE YOUR ENERGY

FOR DANCE PRACTICE TONIGHT, CHUCK.

YEAH.

KEEP PRETENDING THIS IS ALL ABOUT DANCING.

I THINK WE ALL KNOW THE REAL REASON

YOU ASKED ME TO PROM IS 'CAUSE YOU LIKE ME.

( clicks tongue )

( salsa music playing )

IT'S JUST ABOUT DANCING.

YOU READY TO ORDER?

I THINK I'M GOING TO START WITH SOME PROM-EGRANATE JUICE.

YOU MEAN POMEGRANATE JUICE?

WHAT DID I SAY?

PROM-EGRANATE?

( laughs ) THAT'S WEIRD.

IT'S POM. NOT PROM.

ARE YOU GOING TO BE DOING THIS ALL NIGHT?

( chuckles ) SORRY.

IT'S JUST THAT MY PROM'S ONLY A WEEK AWAY,

AND EVERYBODY ELSE HAS A DATE.

ABOUT THAT.

SEE, PROM IS ON THE SAME NIGHT

AS THIS OTHER AWESOME EVENT THAT I REALLY WANTED TO TAKE YOU TO--

THE PIG MUD RUN.

WOW.

THAT DOES SOUND AWESOME.

WHAT'S A PIG MUD RUN?

IT'S A RACE IN MY HOMETOWN

WHERE YOU CARRY A PIG THROUGH A MUDDY FIELD

WHILE PEOPLE THROW TOMATOES AT YOU.

AND I THOUGHT PROM WAS ROMANTIC.

SO WHAT DO YOU SAY?

COME WITH ME.

YOU'LL GET TO SEE MY RANCH,

AND MEET MY FAMILY.

AND HAVE TOMATOES THROWN AT YOU WHILE YOU CARRY A MUDDY PIG.

AS GREAT AS ALL THAT SOUNDS,

I REALLY WANT TO GO TO MY PROM.

WELL, MAYBE THIS WILL CHANGE YOUR MIND.

WHEN YOU CROSS THE FINISH LINE AND HOSE DOWN,

YOU GET TO EAT YOUR PIG.

YEAH.

THAT DIDN'T CHANGE MY MIND.

SO GAVIN FINALLY ASKED YOU TO PROM, HUH?

NO, INSTEAD HE ASKED HER

TO CARRY A PIG THROUGH MUD WHILE PEOPLE THROUGH TOMATOES AT HER.

I GUESS I DON'T NEED THIS DRESS ANYMORE.

I'M REALLY SORRY, HONEY. I KNOW HOW IMPORTANT PROM WAS TO YOU.

BUT ON THE BRIGHT SIDE,

NOW YOU CAN RETURN THE DRESS AND GET YOUR MONEY BACK.

YOU ALWAYS KNOW JUST WHAT TO SAY, DAD.

( chuckles )

DON'T BE TOO UPSET ABOUT PROM.

AT LEAST YOU'RE NOT GOING WITH CHUCK.

HE KEEPS SENDING ME WEIRD LOVE POEMS.

"I'M SO GLAD MY PROM DATE IS YOU,

NO ONE'S MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN MY TRISHY-POO."

AWW!

I MEAN, EW.

WE'VE RENTED OUR TUXES.

AND A LLAMA TO TAKE US TO THE PROM.

WHOO!

YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO GET A LIMO.

OH. I WAS WONDERING HOW WE WERE ALL GOING TO FIT

ON THE LLAMA.

( romantic music playing )

ALLY, IT'S HAPPENING!

OH, BOY. OH, BOY.

ALLY, I KNOW YOU'VE ALWAYS DREAMED ABOUT THIS DAY.

SO I WANT TO MAKE IT SPECIAL FOR YOU.

WILL YOU DO ME THE HONOR OF LETTING ME TAKE YOU TO YOUR PROM?

THAT'S THE PART WHERE YOU SAY "YES."

( sighs ) I CAN'T.

I'M SORRY.

( whispers )

I'M GUESSING YOU DON'T WANT A COPY OF THIS.

SO WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT?

ALL YOU'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THE LAST MONTH

IS GAVIN ASKING YOU TO PROM.

I KNOW.

IT'S JUST THAT AFTER OUR LAST TALK

I'M NOT SURE GAVIN'S RIGHT FOR ME.

BECAUSE OF THE PIG MUD RUN?

IT'S MORE THAN THAT.

HE ALSO INVITED ME TO A CHICKEN MUD RUN.

IT'S THE SAME THING.

BUT WITH CHICKENS.

SO ARE YOU GOING TO BREAK UP WITH HIM?

I DON'T KNOW.

I'M GOING TO TELL HIM TO GO TO THE PIG MUD RUN WITHOUT ME

SO I HAVE SOME TIME TO THINK.

ALL I KNOW IS I'D RATHER STAY HOME

THAN GO TO PROM WITH THE WRONG GUY.

I HEAR YOU.

I WISH I WAS GOING WITH JACE INSTEAD OF CHUCK.

HE WON'T LEAVE ME ALONE.

AND HIS POEMS ARE GETTING WORSE.

"I'VE GOT A NEW GIRL,

HER NAME IS TRISH,

I LIE AWAKE DREAMING OF OUR FIRST KISH."

THERE IS NO WAY I'M KISHING HIM.

DID YOU GET ONE WITH MY PHONE?

MAKE SURE YOU USE THE FLASH. I LOOK BETTER IN BRIGHT LIGHT.

MAKE SURE YOU GET MY GOOD SIDE.

AND MY OTHER GOOD SIDE.

TAKE ANOTHER ONE WITH MINE. I THINK I BLINKED.

OOH, LET'S DO ONE WITH SILLY FACES.

I'VE BEEN DOING SILLY FACES THE WHOLE TIME.

OKAY, WE'RE DONE.

( chuckles )

AH, I LOVE THAT DRESS, CARRIE.

THANKS, IT'S SO TIGHT I CAN'T SIT DOWN.

BUT IT WAS THE ONLY ONE I COULD FIND

IN MY FAVORITE COLOR.

SHE HAD TO STAND UP IN THE LIMO ON THE WAY OVER HERE.

GOOD THING THEY HAD A SUNROOF.

THAT EXPLAINS THE TREE BRANCH IN YOUR HAIR.

NO, I PUT THAT THERE TO HOLD MY HAIR UP.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF TRISH'S CORSAGE?

I GREW IT MYSELF.

THAT'S RIGHT. I GARDEN.

I ALSO WOODWORK.

I'M GOING TO USE MY DANCE WINNINGS TO BUY NEW TOOLS.

YOU GUYS REALLY DIDN'T NEED TO STOP BY HERE.

WE WANTED TO SEE YOU.

FEELS WEIRD GOING TO PROM WITHOUT YOU.

ARE YOU SURE YOU DON'T WANT TO COME WITH US?

YEAH, ALLY. YOU ALREADY HAVE A DRESS.

WE'LL WAIT FOR YOU TO GET READY.

SERIOUSLY? THAT COULD TAKE HOURS.

LOOK AT HER HAIR.

ALLY, DON'T LISTEN TO HIM.

YOU LOOK GREAT.

YOU ALWAYS LOOK GREAT.

UM, DID THOSE TWO USE TO HAVE A THING?

LONG STORY SHORT-- AUSTIN FIRST MET ALLY

ON AN UNSEASONABLY WARM SUMMER AFTERNOON.

AUSTIN WAS PLAYING THE DRUMS WHEN ALLY SAID,

"DON'T YOU SEE THE--"

THEY HAD A THING. IT'S OVER.

HUH. GOT IT.

YOU GOING TO BE OKAY HERE BY YOURSELF?

I'LL BE FINE.

I WANT YOU ALL TO HAVE A FUN TIME WITHOUT ME.

WE ALWAYS DO.

( dance music playing )

AWW!

I WISH ALLY WAS HERE.

SHE WOULD HAVE LOVED THIS MANATEE CANDLE.

SHE LOVES CANDLES. AND MANATEES.

ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'RE SHAPED LIKE MANATEES.

THAT'S THE FIFTH TIME YOU'VE BROUGHT UP ALLY.

IN THE LIMO, YOU KEPT ON SAYING

HOW MUCH SHE LOVES LONG CARS AND BENCH-STYLE SEATING?

WE'RE REALLY GOOD FRIENDS.

AND I FEEL BAD SHE'S NOT HERE TO ENJOY ALL THIS.

AND YOU'RE SURE THAT'S IT?

I KNOW YOU GUYS USED TO GO OUT.

THAT'S ANCIENT HISTORY.

THE POINT IS I'M WITH YOU NOW.

AND I'M REALLY HAPPY.

I'M REALLY HAPPY TOO.

HEY, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GO GET OUR PICTURE TAKEN?

GOOD IDEA.

MY HAIR LOOKS BEST AN HOUR AFTER I GEL.

( chuckles )

HEY, BABE, DO YOU WANT ME TO CUT YOUR FOOD FOR YOU?

SHE CAN'T SIT BECAUSE OF HER DRESS.

SO YOU'RE JUST GOING TO STAND ALL NIGHT?

IT'S NO BIG DEAL.

I STAND ALL THE TIME. I'M REALLY GOOD AT IT.

WAIT A MINUTE.

IF YOU CAN'T MOVE IN THAT DRESS,

- HOW ARE YOU GOING TO DANCE? - LIKE THIS.

BABE, YOU'RE THE BEST.

BUT I'M GOING TO LOSE THE COMPETITION

BECAUSE OF YOUR STUPID, BEAUTIFUL DRESS.

TRISH, I'M REALLY HAPPY YOU ASKED ME TO PROM.

WHEN SUN HEE AND I BROKE UP,

I WAS SO HURT.

BUT THEN WE GOT BACK TOGETHER, AND I FELT BETTER.

BUT THEN WE BROKE UP AGAIN.

AND I WAS SO HURT AGAIN.

( sighs )

BUT NOW, HERE YOU ARE.

AND I FEEL BETTER. AGAIN!

- JACE? - HUH?

OOH, I SAID FACE.

THERE'S SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE.

HERE, I'LL GO GET YOU A NAPKIN.

( chuckles )

JACE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

TRISH, YOU LOOK SO BEAUTIFUL.

( sighs )

I JUST WANTED TO SURPRISE YOU.

THERE'S NO WAY I WAS LEAVING MY GIRL ALONE ON PROM NIGHT.

I'M NOT ALONE.

BECAUSE YOU'RE HERE NOW.

BUT I WAS ALONE BEFORE YOU GOT HERE.

COMPLETELY, TOTALLY BY MYSELF.

WELL, I'M HERE NOW. LET'S GET SOMETHING TO DRINK.

OH, THAT'D BE NICE.

BUT YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE NICER?

YOU GETTING IT FOR ME.

AH, MIGHT BE KIND OF HARD TO CARRY A DRINK

- WITH MY CRUTCHES AND ALL, BUT-- - THANKS!

SURPRISE!

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HARD IT WAS

NOT TO TELL YOU JACE WAS COMING.

WHOO!

YOU KNEW ABOUT THIS?

YEP, FOR A WHOLE WEEK.

AND YOU SAID I COULDN'T KEEP A SECRET. HA!

YOU OKAY, HON?

I'M HANGING OUT HERE BY MYSELF

WHILE MY BEST FRIENDS ARE AT PROM.

WHY WOULDN'T I BE OKAY?

LOOK...

I GET YOU NOT WANTING TO GO TO PROM WITH THE WRONG GUY.

SO WHY DON'T YOU GO WITH ME?

I MEAN, I WENT WITH MY MOTHER TO PROM.

EW.

I MEAN, AWW!

NO, I DEFINITELY MEAN "EW."

OKAY, OKAY, BUT YOU SHOULD STILL GO.

SO YOU DON'T HAVE A DATE-- YOU COULD STILL HAVE FUN WITH YOUR FRIENDS.

MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

GO! HAVE A GREAT TIME.

I'LL EVEN PAY FOR YOUR DRESS.

- REALLY? - YEAH.

YOU KNOW WHAT--

I'M GOING TO DO IT. I'M GOING TO GO TO PROM.

SEE, THAT SMILE ON YOUR FACE

IS WORTH WAY MORE THAN--

$20.

THAT SAYS $220.

- WHAT? - THANKS, DAD.

- YOU'RE THE BEST. - WAIT.

WE MAKE SUCH A CUTE COUPLE.

THIS PICTURE CAME OUT GREAT.

I WOULD HOPE SO.

YOU MADE THAT GUY RETAKE IT 17 TIMES.

WELL, IT'S NOT MY FAULT

THAT LIGHTING MADE MY PORES LOOK HUGE.

SPEAKING OF, CAN I HAVE MY COMPACT BACK?

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

IT'S MY TURN TO GO FRESHEN UP.

I NEED YOUR HELP.

I NEED YOU TO DISTRACT JACE

SO HE DOESN'T FIND OUT ABOUT CHUCK.

OR DISTRACT CHUCK SO HE DOESN'T FIND OUT ABOUT JACE.

I DON'T CARE. JUST DISTRACT SOMEBODY.

WHY DON'T YOU JUST TELL THEM BOTH THE TRUTH?

BECAUSE JACE WILL BE ANGRY I LIED

AND CHUCK WILL BE HEARTBROKEN.

I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS,

BUT I DON'T WANT TO BREAK CHUCK'S HEART.

HUH-- PUT A DRESS ON YOU,

AND SUDDENLY YOU'RE ALL LADYLIKE.

YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT'S LIKE

TO BE AT PROM WITH ONE PERSON

WHEN THERE'S ANOTHER PERSON YOU'D RATHER BE WITH.

MM.

ACTUALLY, I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THAT'S LIKE.

TRISH, I'VE MADE A HUGE MISTAKE.

I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE WITH PIPER.

I'M SUPPOSED TO BE HERE WITH ALLY.

AND YOU'RE NOT TRISH.

YOU DON'T WANT TO BE HERE WITH MY SISTER?

PLEASE DON'T SAY ANYTHING TO PIPER.

I DON'T WANT TO RUIN HER PROM.

YOU KNOW, AUSTIN,

I'M REALLY GLAD THAT WE'RE HERE.

EVEN IF YOUR PORES ARE HUGE.

PIPER, THERE'S SOMETHING I HAVE TO TELL YOU.

NICE TUX, CHUCK.

BUT IT'S NOT AS SHARP AS MINE.

PLEASE, RED.

MY TUX IS SO SHARP,

IT COMES WITH SAFETY GOGGLES.

OH, YEAH?

MY TUX IS SO SHARP,

I GOT A PAPER CUT JUST PUTTING IT ON.

MY TUX IS SO SHARP,

JAPANESE CHEFS USE IT TO CHOP VEGETABLES

TABLESIDE.

( imitates chopping )

- HU-AH! - HA!

MY TUX IS SO SHARP,

TEACHERS WARN LITTLE KIDS NOT TO RUN WITH IT.

MY TUX IS SO SHARP,

INSTEAD OF PENCIL SHARPENERS,

PEOPLE USE "PENCIL MY-TUX-ENERS."

OKAY, THAT ONE DIDN'T MAKE ANY SENSE.

EH, I'LL ADMIT THAT ONE WAS A STRETCH.

POINT IS...

I LOOK SHARP.

NOW YOU DO.