Original subtitles

Read the incantation, helpy!

Oh!

Helpy!

Read! Now!

Bah!

I...

...Can't...

...Read!

Ha!

Agh!

Ah!

Get in this library

And don't come out until you can!

Ah!

Read!

Oh, great and knowledgeful lore-mastra,

Bestow upon my helpy your knowing how to read.

Sound it out, helpy.

Ta-thu... The...

Read the words in front of you

That I'm pointing to on the page.

Thh! Thhh! Thhhh!

Thhhhhh! Th!

That's good enough, helpy.

The rest of my head book is too advanced

And horrible for you,

For it holds all knowledge.

And records all history as it happens

Up to the minute, even now!

But helpy want to read more.

You will need to practice makes perfect.

You can take any book from the library

To practice with at home.

But I don't have a home.

Any book in the library!

Ohhh.

Eh...

Hey, kid! Whoa!

Read me!

I don't know.

Don't judge a book by its horns

And locked in a cage.

I am a good read.

Take my word for it.

"der... Nood... Reed."

Hey, "read"!

That book is right.

come on.

Read me.

Aah!

Okay!

"read... Teh... Wooords...

Unlish... Eval..."

Ah!

Ah! Ah!

Well, I found my book.

Oh, good job. Where is it?

Over there.

Check me out!

I am chap-tor!

- Wha? - Wha?

The tome of terror!

- What? - The en-psycho-pedia of pain!

- Wha-a-a-a-a? - The pages of rages!

- No! - World domination edition!

Chap-tor?!

What is that? A book?

An evil one.

Eons ago, he was read from

And led an uprising, enslaving humanity!

And he's doing it all over again.

That's the ancientest trick in the book!

Helpy, did you read from chap-tor?

Mm, I don't know.

My memory's a little fuzzy.

Well, maybe this will help you remember.

Hmm? Still a little fuzzy.

Ah! Aah!

You spineless humans and thing are all that stand in my way

From world domination again!

Agh!

I'll throw the me at you!

Grovel before this novel!

- Agh! - Aah!

we mustn't let him out.

Literal! Literary! Lockdown!

- Ah! - It's got to be here.

I must use reading to read how

Chap-tor was defeated the last time!

Reading? I can help with that.

You've done enough reading!

Oh, reading takes too long!

There is one other way.

You must enter the book

And see how chap-tor was defeated the last time.

It will be a quest for knowledge

And dangerous!

You had me at "dangerous."

Page!

Portal!

Ha! No!

Wha?

I am an evil book

Taking over your body with mind control.

Page! Portal! Appear!

Ahh!

Hurry, tigtone!

Aah!

Libraries will be prisons for books no more!

Rise, my leather-bound brethren!

We have been shelved for too long.

We are the authors of our own destiny,

Written in blood!

Vengeance is overdue!

Gahhhh!

Ahhhhh!

Okay, here I go!

Tigtone!

I will find out how to stop chap-tooooor!

You protect the head booook!

I'll be baaaack...

To stop chap-toooor!

That book holds the unlocking spell.

Book it!

Ahhhhhh!

Ah!

Ah-ha! This looks good.

Invade their borders!

Burn their barns!

Kill their nobles!

Chap-tor is an evil warlord!

A warrior from the sky,

Here to free us from the evil chap-tor.

That's for you to do

And me to find out how.

Good idea, tigtone!

We will free ourselves from the evil chap-tor.

Time to relax and see how this all plays out.

Yah! Ah!

Ha-ha-ha! Get 'em, boys.

Guh!

Aaah!

Ahhh!

Ha!

This is it!

I'm about to find out how they are defeating chap-tor!

Aah!

Aah!

Wait. What happened?

What happened to the exact moment in history

I needed to witness?

Gone!

I don't know how,

But this must be helpy's fault!

Aah!

I will make you to read the unlocking spell.

ohhhh!

I never read words that big before.

Sound it out.

You can do it, you dunce!

Can't... Read...

Too... Many...

Letters... I believe in you!

Or else!

Oh... unna... That's it, you fool.

Uh... unlo... unlock...

Oh, no! Helpy's trying to read again.

I all know what happened the last time that happened.

Helpy!

Do not!

Read!

Oh, it's no use.

Why did I ever make helpy learn to read?

Wait.

If this book contains all history, even now,

Then it contains all history even then!

Time to tear through this book!

Ahhhhhhhh!

Ahhhhh!

I must skip ahead to the final chap-tor!

Sound it out, helpy.

Ta-thu... The...

Read the spell and get us out of this joint.

Read the words in front of you

That I'm pointing to on the page!

Thh! Thhh! Thhhh!

Ahhhhhh!

Ahhhhhhhhh! Ah!

Never let helpy learn to read!

Do what tigtone says!

I never learned how to read!

But you read me earlier.

I never did.

You have no knowledge over me!

Ahh, a textbook ending.

Aah!

Ah!

No reading!

Ugh. Time to do what I should've done a long time ago...

...Keep him out of reach

From grubby, little, purple hands.

Helpy, sometimes not reading is a thing you can do.

"dear journal,

In the end it turns out that knowledge is not power.

Not ever power is power.

Only tigtone is power.

And that is me, journal.

Only me is power!"

I thought you couldn't read.

I can't, but I can write.

What are you writing?

A ransom note.

Hee-hee-hee-hee. Ahh! Ahh!

"dear anubhiss, we have kidnapped your son.

And don't bother writing back because I cannot read."

Noooooooooooooooooo!

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